stervrucht

[stervrucht]

不插电的路边约会

[stervrucht]

This was such a fun, incredible, amazing and spontaneous collab between the wonderfully talented @inklessletter and I. I have always loved her work so much and her lines. Sigh. I feel so incredibly honoured to have had the chance to paint her beautiful linework🩷💕✨ I hope you all love it just as much as I do. Also, please read the beautiful ficlet Inklessletter wrote to accompany it!

"Let me hate you." "That won't change a thing."

This is what happens when the amazing, unbelievably talented @stervrucht suggest that we collab (like, this morning, literally). Dropped everything to give her something to work her magic on.

At risk of being a bit too much (I warned you), let me tell you, this is the most fun I've had playing around with art in a long, LONG time. Thank you for this amazing experience, art buddy 💞

Lineart + ficlet (below) - @inklessletter

Colouring - @stervrucht

WC: 917 | Steddie, Steve's POV, Mild Hurt/Comfort, internalized homophobia.

THE CAGE

In the cage, they're always skin to skin.

Lip to lip.

In the cage, there's an obscene amount of props to change the scene whenever Steve feels like it, so they can be together in every alternative universe.

(Oh, Steve knows now a lot of alternative universes, because it's hard not to listen to him when he speaks so passionately.)

He speaks up, shares secrets, holds hands and looks straight in the eye of Eddie Munson with no fear, in the cage.

And Eddie reciprocates. He stares back right into Steve's soul and he feels like nothing but flesh and bones made to break with love words. Steve longs to be no more, no less.

In the cage.

The cage is safe, because it's secret. Nobody knows about it, not even Robin. Talking about the cage means it exists. And if it exists, then he has to do something about it. It hasn't always existed, though. There was a time where Steve wore his heart on his sleeve and, well, you know, he never got a good eye to guess how strong or delicate are the things he holds.

His heart was fine once, though. Now it's patched up, now he's more careful with it. Fragile, damaged goods that he's sure that can't afford another blow. Not even a little one.

Not even by accident.

So, the cage is impenetrable. Nobody comes in, nobody comes out except what Steve decides, and this time, the cage fits everything that can't exist with Eddie Munson out of it.

The cage is where all those feelings he can't ever express go to die, and they both bury them together. Steve and Eddie. They make art with it.

The cage is fine, the cage is safe, because everything is contained in there.

Until it's not.

Until that stupid morning he wakes up in a mess of bed sheets that feel ablaze, and he's sweaty, and half hard, and wet, and he wakes up with Eddie's name in his lips.

But hey, nobody is there to listen to it, so does a tree make a sound when there's nobody to hear it fall down?

That is no comfort, though. Not even in the slightest.

Because there's a breach in the cage, now.

He said his name and his heart is balancing on breaking branches and unstable now.

After that day, everything leaks.

He blushes, ridiculously so, when Eddie so much looks at him.

He tries not to flinch at the accidental touch, not to react to the shock wave it sends through his system, and given that Eddie is a very tactile person, it's torture.

He never looks at him in the eye. He might see the breach. The cage.

They are never alone.

Not anymore, really.

Steve avoids it, and it's getting more and more difficult to find excuses, because they see each other all the time.

He's starting to notice that Eddie knows something and Steve is freaking out. Eddie acts a bit hurt with every rejection, and good. Steve would rather Eddie thinks that he doesn't like him than to admit the truth.

But it's a loss.

The cage is the home of uninvited grief now.

Steve wonders, when he's alone, holding his heart with shaky hands, if he has the right to cry.

Hasn't cried in years.

Steve decides that he hasn't any.

Puts his heart away, broken glass, in a shelf to gather dust, though he knows he might forget about it and break it accidentally when he tries to clean his cage.

Has happened before, will happen again, because Steve is cursed.

A fight is the better choice.

Destroy the cage.

He goes to meet Eddie to be his worst self, he's got experience in that. He can be mean, no, cruel. He'll be cruel, he'll make him want not to be in the same room with him and Steve will eventually find peace.

He will be able to rest.

To fall in a dreamless sleep in what's left of what was safe once.

Yeah, he'll do that.

Only it's not that what happens.

Steve is tense, doesn't know if to punch or run. Push him against the wall because how dares Eddie to be understanding. How dares he to be considerate, and how dares he to read and listen what's coming out of the cage.

What give him the right.

How dares he to say "it's okay."

Fuck you, Eddie, it is not okay.

He's wrong.

He's delicate.

How dares he to grab his heart, he's going to crush it with those stupid, careless fingers full of stupid rough silver chunks he wears for jewelry.

Fuck you, Eddie.

He actually says that, though.

"Fuck you."

The fact that he's about to cry, now, of all times he could have done it, he's about to cry now, when his voice is shaky, and his insults don't land.

"I love you."

His heart is in pieces.

He is in pieces. Destroyed. Demolished.

"Let me hate you", is what he begs. Isn't that pathetic?

"That won't change a thing."

Eddie is touching him now and Steve is not flinching. He wants to grab his face, push him away, scream and spit on his face. Why is Eddie not seeing what Steve is trying to do here? He's just trying to survive, because he can't avoid it anymore. He's already broken.

Has been for a while now.

Outside the cage, they're now skin to skin.

Lip to lip.

[stervrucht]

Patreon | Bluesky | Instagram

'I called time, sweetheart', Eddie says, gasping like he's been working out, high intensity, he's strong. 'You OK?' Steve nods, mouth dry, eyes wet, heart fucked. Fucked. 'I'm good', he says, still got that weird juddery laughter inside, it's so fucking strange. 'I'm good, Daddy.' He fucking feels it.

'Scorpio Skies' by @azrielgreen

This is a great moment to remind you that:

a) There's a 7 days free trial on my Patreon in my highest current tier waiting for you (if only for this particular piece, ahem).

b) This is a scene of a fic that you can read here (and believe me, it's leaving bodies wherever it goes).

[stervrucht]

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quick doodle

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Chapter 4 of Eidolon is out now!

⇢ Read on AO3

For the Eddie Munson Big Bang. We are Team 001 with @fracturedarkness and @hel-s-art as artists!

Updates every monday and thursday!

Pairing: Eddie Munson/Steve Harrington

Rating: M (for now)

Words: 13.3K

Status: Ongoing

Tags: Post-Season 4, Science Fiction, Psychological Horror, Eddie Munson Lives (with a twist), Character Death Fix, Getting Together, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, like...a lot of hurt and a lot of comfort, emotional whiplash, Pining, Steve is oblivious as hell, Obsession, Happy Ending

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the wrath of the lamb

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when you start using the internet they try to warn you about all the dangers but they never mention the worst one

you'll meet so many cool, kissable people and they'll change ur life for the better in so many ways but then they live on the other side of the fucking planet

[stervrucht]

predator

another sketchy one where i wanted to try something eerie

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gay ass greg

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What would an ocean be without a monster lurking in the dark? It would be like sleep without dreams.

Will Graham surrounded by fish but he's the real catch fr fr.

Corel Painter + Photoshop

(prints of this available on my print shop!!)

[stervrucht]

Will sitting on Hannibal's desk

Hannibal 1.02 Amuse-bouche | 1.05 Coquilles | 1.08 Fromage | 2.09 Shiizakana

[stervrucht]

Commission for the bsky giveaway winner @bebopbabyy 🖤✨

Eddie comes home from prison, and his sweetheart is waiting for him at the trailer — it’s been a what? Almost two years, and he’s hungry for Steve.

[stervrucht]

Chapter 3 of Eidolon is out now!

⇢ Read on AO3

For the Eddie Munson Big Bang. We are Team 001 with @fracturedarkness and @hel-s-art as artists!

Pairing: Eddie Munson/Steve Harrington

Rating: M (for now)

Words: 9.8K

Status: Ongoing

Tags: Post-Season 4, Science Fiction, Psychological Horror, Eddie Munson Lives (with a twist), Character Death Fix, Getting Together, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, like...a lot of hurt and a lot of comfort, emotional whiplash, Pining, Steve is oblivious as hell, Obsession, Happy Ending

[stervrucht]