#i’m so alone.
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is this a safe space
#///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////#////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////#i’m so alone.#last tuesday i attempted to walk in front of a speeding car and if it wasn’t for someone nearby physically restraining me at the last second#it would have worked#i don’t have any commentary on that i’ve just been. sitting with it i suppose.#yet i still wish he hadn’t been there#i’m looking for a therapist but i need one that specializes in long term CSA and that is very expensive and very hard to find#i’m. not doing well. i can’t sleep or eat. i have no passion not even for my ocs. i do nothing all day all the time.#and the time just keeps passing.#unrelated but i may have pots and in addition to dental pain and a persistent physical heartache i feel like my body is giving up too#ive worked so hard through depression since i was eleven years old and i made such amazing progress over a decade and i feel like it’s all#been undone. i’m tired. i tried to make my life beautiful and when i succeeded i really succeeded but god i don’t want to try again#anyway i don’t want to be all woe is me so i won’t. this is just another diary entry i suppose.#it’s hard to find joy on tumblr while struggling but i love you all <33#anyways.txt
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Gregory has it best out of the new FNAF protagonists..
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf gregory#fnaf oswald#fnaf cassie#security breach#fnaf ruin#into the pit#fnaf fanart#I DREW OSWALD AGAIN 🔥#now I’m not saying Gregory had it SUPER easy#he definitely still went through a lot of harrowing stuff#BUT compared to the other two?? Gregory definitely had more of a fun time#mean when he was in the pizzaplex it was still active#he also had Glamrock Freddy with him most of the time#he basically got two new family members out of the experience#CASSIE though literally was alone#tricked by the mimic to go to an abandoned building#and may or may not of been betrayed by Gregory at the end#WHILE Oswald literally went through a Coraline like story#dude literally saw kids his age get murdered#his dad gets kidnapped and the agony creature pretends to be his dad#SO YEAH Gregory probably had the best time BAHA#I will not stop drawing all FNAF characters casually hanging out 💜#it’s always fun to do!! 🩵🩵
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“‘I just…I thought you might like to come back, one day,’ Crowley said very quietly. Aziraphale’s foot pressed against his again, and Crowley drew in a sudden breath, as if he hadn’t been breathing properly since Aziraphale had stopped touching him.”
This piece was a commission from the lovely @fellshish for their lovely friend, @alphacentaurinebula ‘s fic What Are You Doing Here? This fic is cute, funny, heartwarming, and incredibly spicy, and I’m very much looking forward to finishing it! Thank you Fells for being wonderful to work with, and happy (belated) birthday to you Alphacentauri, I’m very happy I could do this for you!
#I had the quote the fic it’s just so good#and cute#good omens#art#illustration#my art#aziraphale#crowley#ineffable husbands#good omens fanart#ALPHAAAAAAAA HAPPY BIRTHDAY#I’m so happy was asked to make art for the both of you y’all are so wonderful and nice to work with#I really hope you enjoy it#❤️❤️❤️❤️🎈🎁🎁🎈🎈🎁🎁🎁🎈🎈🎁🎁🎈🎈🎉🎊🎊🎉🎉#everyone go read the fanfic plsss#even if smut isn’t your thing the first chapter is incredibly good as a stand alone#good omens fanfiction
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It’s a little bit crazy that it’s specifically because of Mark that The Edge of Sleep was such a hard sell (per his comment here).
Apparently no one wanted to touch it, because of Mark. Because of the stereotype that Youtubers and internet creators labor under. The only reason we have it now is that it got self-published via Prime. There was no marketing for so long because no one owns it. No one was willing to take it on.
And it’s extra crazy that Mark is taking full responsibility for this and trying to overturn that exact stereotype. Not just for the many folks involved with The Edge of Sleep, not just to see Iron Lung finally get pushed through to us, but for every Youtuber, every online creator, and everyone who comes after.
Revolutions don’t happen in a day, or even in a month. But Mark asked us for one small, important goal — to start a wildfire for just thirty days.
Just thirty days.
Can you imagine how much work that Mark has been doing behind the scenes, for years? For TEOS, for Iron Lung, and before that, for In Space with Markiplier, for projects we may not even be aware of? To legitimize his own incredible work? Being constantly brushed off because he started from the bottom and built his talent with his own two hands?
Imagine how many more creators are waiting in the wings with the most incredible things, constantly told no because they’re not considered a “real” artist.
The Edge of Sleep matters so much, to so many people. It’s not the end, either. It’s the beginning of a very long uphill journey. It’s not going to be easy. It’s going to take a very long time and a lot of perseverance to see anything come out of this.
But for right now? It’s just thirty days.
Don’t lose sight of why it matters.
#teos#the edge of sleep#markiplier#mark fischbach#edge of sleep#i’m seeing so many people complain that it takes work to make change#like. yeah it’s going to take work. that’s why we aren’t doing it alone#marks been carrying this battle on his back for how long? alone? and yall can’t last two weeks?
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yeah so this was insane
#i feel like too many people reduce this interaction to jason being like ‘lol same’#but idk :/#this chapter is from jason’s pov#and leading up to it he’s like ‘people keep walking on eggshells around me bc of the the michael varus stab wound’#and he hates it so when he goes on deck to help out with the storm#everyone’s like wtf except for percy#and jason states how much he appreciated percy not treating him like a sick kid#and i feel like it’s echoed in this sentiment where jason could say so many things like#‘you should never feel that way’ ‘im here if you need anything’#but he doesn’t make percy feel alone in his desire to just…. end it all#which ik for some people that doesn’t work but you’re not a character in hoo and percy is dealing with so much guilt#and he can’t tell annabeth bc she’s a main aspect of that guilt#and he doesn’t wanna guilt her more and he feels ashamed and when he describes this he feels weird for feeling it#so having jason this tough guy be like ‘yo i understand it bc i felt the same way#that’s gotta mean a lot to percy#also insane how jason who also struggles to display vulnerability#allows it in one of few times in this moment just so percy this guy he’s supposed to be jealous about#feels comforted and not alone in his guilt and shame#and also it’s just insane how jason’s wanting to kay em ess does not get talked about AT ALL#and just seeing his mom and the pressure of new rome getting to him#like this scene is insane and i’ll never shut up about it#also ignore me i’m just finishing my reread of hoo that took all summer#jason grace#percy jackson#pjo#ashla.txt
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I don’t know how many “just make it through today”s I’ve got left.
#mentally exhausted#i dont want to be here#im losing hope#tw depressing stuff#i’m so alone#self h@rm#mental health relapse#i hate my existence#anxi4ty#deppresing quotes
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i’m just gonna come out and say it
if luke comes back in a future book, i hope percy is taller than him now.
#like a good few inches taller#if you can’t relate to this thought process then keep on scrolling#call me toxic#call me petty#call me stupid#i don’t care#i know damn well that height doesn’t matter and doesn’t make one man better than another#it doesn’t represent dominance#percy is the better man because of his bravery and his loyalty and his unwavering goodness#but i’m so loyal to percy that literally anything that gives him any sort of edge over luke gives me satisfaction#LEAVE ME AND MY PETTINESS ALONE#unless you ageee#then please join the club#i swear to gods if even one person calls me toxic or says i’m encouraging double standards i WILL delete this app and im not bluffing#THAT IS NOT WHAT THIS IS ABOUT#YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND#short kings i love you don’t even worry#this is between me and luke#and percy and luke#percy jackson#luke castellan#pjo#percabeth#heroes of olympus#percy jackson and the olympians#annabeth chase#rick riordan#riordanverse#pjo headcanons
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“buffy ended the show single :)” ok but only because her current love interest just DIED!! (he near quite literally died in her arms! in sacrifice for her!) her last words of the entire series were telling him she loves him and then saying his name in admiration. she isn’t single; she’s a widow.
#spuffy#anti cookie dough#also lol just for clarity and so they don’t come here:#anti bangel#anti-bangel#this post inspired by nothing in particular#except the ongoing women need to be alone to be strong bullshit narrative by anti feminist JW#can’t believe so much of the fandom buys that#buffy anne summers LOVES love#she values romance in her life#look at the way she talks to and looks at and touches spike in s7#and TRY to tell me she just wanted to be alone#you can’t#that’s insane troll logic#and i’m so serious fking ANTI cookie dough!!#no one is ever done baking#ever#we all grow and change our entire lives and we deserve companionship while we do that#i’m not saying buffy needed to be ready to settle down#whatever that means#but she very clearly enjoyed having spike as a partner#as evidenced by the scene IMMEDIATELY after the cookie dough speech lol#and she should get to have a romantic partner who also wants her#ie spike#obligatory fandom and shippy tags:#spuffy is endgame#you’re the one buffy#i believe in you spike#btvs#buffy the vampire slayer
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Oh right... The curse. The curse of Strahd. The curse chosen specially to torture Strahd, Strahd’s curse.
#god i’m so tired#the castle ravenloft chapter is exhausting#just by sheer volume alone#and this keeps playing in my head while I'm reading it#cos spoilers#queued post bc lazy#dming is hard#curse of strahd#strahd campaign#dnd strahd#dnd#dnd shenanigans#dnd campaign#dnd5e#d&d campaign#d&d 5e#d&d#dungeon master#dungeons and dragons#curse of strahd spoilers#cos
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Doomed by the narrative - Doomed by her parents
#I’m sorry for this#but I am so fucking angry at them right now#it was about Louis guilt it was about lestat fear of being alone#her turning wasn’t about her#interview with the vampire#iwtv#iwtv s2#iwtv spoilers#spoilers#iwtv s2 spoilers#claudia#claudia de pointe du lac#claudia de lioncourt#baby I’ll give you my surname you deserve better#lestat de lioncourt#louis de pointe du lac#jacob anderson#sam reid#isn’t having a child the most selfish of all selfish acts#delainey hayles#armand#assad zaman#iwtv edit#iwtv gifset#tvcentral#god I’m so mad#original p.#iwtv gifsets
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Those were Vanessa's friends too in the FNAF movie
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#vanessa afton#fnaf vanessa#vanessa shelly#fnaf missing children#fnaf mci#abby schmidt#fnaf movie#fnaf fanart#OKAY time for your daily angst now#I can not stop thinking about Vanessa’s story in the fnaf movie#it was my take away that the ghost kids were actually Vanessa’s friends#and that’s why she cares sm for them#she builds forts and checks up on them etc#the ghost kids even tells Abby that Vanessa is nice and they like her#SO I think those were Vanessa’s friends#and in some way she’s happy Abby can talk to them#cause she doesn’t want them to be alone#Vanessa I’m so sorry this all happened to you 🩵
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sigh i had an epiphany
book 4 is just a whole ass scooby doo episode huh
#there’s even FIVE of them#no i am unable to elaborate further#im afraid if i do i cant go back#so this is for the ones who’ll get it maybe ;;;#also i’m never gonna be over the fact that jamil MIGHT have gotten away with it if he left the prefect alone#jamil my beloved you got too overzealous#[—✦-#-✧ my art#twst art#twst#twisted wonderland#jamil viper#azul ashengrotto#jade leech#floyd leech#twst grim#twst yuu#twst yuusona#(💜) yuusha#-✦—]
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Dead boy detectives in a nutshell:
Simon: let’s fuck
Edwin: no
Cat king: let’s fuck
Edwin: no
Monty: let’s fuck <333
Edwin: ehhh
*meanwhile*
Charles: YAY!! BEST MATES!! :D
Edwin: let’s fuck
#CHAT THIS IS A JOKE I KNOW HE’S A MINOR OK#actually it wasn’t a hard no with the cat king#it was more of an ‘I find u hot but I’m a minor so pls leave me alone’ kinda thing#save dbda#dbda#dbd netflix#incorrect dead boy detectives quotes#incorrect quotes#edwin dead boy detectives#save dead boy detectives#charles dead boy detectives#dead boy detective netflix#dead boy detectives#dead boy detective agency#charles x edwin#edwin payne#edwin x charles#payneland#charles rowland#crystal palace#niko sasaki#monty the crow#cat king
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megan thee stallion is the perfect example of unbothered energy. nicki has repeatedly vagueposted about her, gone on unhinged rants about her, gone so far as to mention her dead mother (such a classless low blow), threatened her on live, and has now released the tackiest diss track in history. and what has megan done? literally nothing. she straight up ignored her, aside from that one ig story where she posted herself laughing (which was perfect btw). she is the epitome of “i will not dignify that w a response.” i love it.
#btw i was rly into megan before it became trendy now in light of her dropping hiss / the nicki debacle#nicki’s latest music has been ass anyway but it’s sad to see her behaving like this to newer rap girls#the parasocial hate is literally so intense / insane like i can’t imagine hating someone enough to be persistently harassing them like this#nicki’s a celeb so you’d think she’d know a thing or two about how dangerous it is to pit her fans on somebody else like this#unless this is all just a bid to stay relevant which i would not be surprised ab but nicki seems PRESSED.#i guess if i released something like pink friday 2 id also be feeling threatened by a new rap girl w the bars megan has#i just want her to leave my homegirl megan alone. good on megan for ignoring and living her best life. the energy i wanna emulate#i’m not usually one to play into the whole pit women against other women thing but nicki’s recent actions are so inappropriate. wild#btw megan majored in health administration in uni?? which is a major factor as to why i’m obsessed w her. anyway#text
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“I don’t regret it, Dean.” Cas says quietly. “Telling you I love you was the best moment of my life.”
“Yeah? Well, it was the worst of mine!” Dean yells, throwing his arms out to the side. There’s a moment of stricken silence where Cas’s face falls and Dean realizes how his words came across. He rushes to elaborate. “Do you know how many years I wondered if angels could feel love? Romantic love? Do you know how long I hoped that they could— that you, specifically, could? And more than that, that you would feel it towards me? I wondered all the goddamn time, Cas. And then you— you finally—“ Dean swallows past a lump in his throat, letting his arms fall back to his sides. “You finally tell me not only that you can love, but you love me. Me. And in one second, ten years of my wildest dreams came true and then were ripped away.”
Dean looks down at his feet. Clenches his jaw against the feelings threatening to choke him. He tries to take a steadying breath in through his nose but it doesn’t help him feel any better.
“Dean—“
“I didn’t think I was ever gonna see you again.” Dean confesses to his boots. “I thought I’d have to live the rest of my miserable life knowing I could’ve had you and kicking myself for being such a dumb piece of shit.” He swallows again and looks up. “I thought you were going to spend eternity not knowing that I love you, too.”
“I didn’t mean— Dean, I didn’t—“ Cas shakes his head as words fail him.
“So yeah,” Dean shrugs a little helplessly, his voice still tight with emotion. “It was the worst moment of my life. Except for every moment that came after— because every single moment from your death until you came back was the worst moment of my life. Every moment without you is. And you coming back could’ve been the best moment of my life if you hadn’t been such an ass about everything.”
There was a time, once, in the distant past where Cas’s face never betrayed any emotion. Dean could’ve scrutinized every single molecule of his expression and he wouldn’t have been able to read a goddamn thing from it. That hasn’t been the case for a long time— Cas took to emotions and humanity better than Dean did, and it was the only thing Dean had ever known.
Now, Dean can read a multitude of emotions in Cas’s expression: disbelief in the slight part of his lips, hope in the blue of his eyes, shock in the rise of his eyebrows. He can practically read every thought going through Cas’s mind as he tries to process what’s happened.
And then, there it is: acceptance in the way the corner of Cas’s mouth ticks up.
“I had no idea.” Cas answers after a moment.
“‘Course you didn’t.” Dean replies, his own mouth mirroring the small smile. “You fucked off before I got a chance to say it back.”
“I just assumed—“
“You know what they say about assuming, Cas.”
“No, I don’t.” Cas is full on smiling now, warm and full of the love Dean had only ever seen hidden in shadows of his expressions. Now it’s practically splitting his face open, spilling out of Cas like he’s finally filled up with so much of it that it’s simply impossible to keep it all in. “And frankly, I don’t care. I only care about what you have to say.”
Dean huffs out a fond laugh as he shakes his head. “Finally gonna let me do the talking, huh?”
“I’m in the mood to do some listening,” Cas’s grin is dazzling and a little cheeky, Dean wants to memorize it immediately.
He takes a step closer to Cas. And then another. Cas simply watches him approach, making no attempt to back away. His personal space is inviting and Dean enjoys stepping directly into it with no hesitation.
“Well, I might be in the mood for something other than talking.” Dean whispers, less than a foot from Cas now.
“Oh?” Cas prompts, his hand reaching across the minuscule place between them to settle on Dean’s hip.
“Yeah,” Dean murmurs, leaning in. “But just to make sure you get it through your stubborn head: I love you, Cas. And I’ll fucking kill you if you ever do something like that again.”
Dean kisses him before Cas has a chance to reply.
#idk man#these idiots just won’t leave me alone#I never write fucking little ficlets and I’ve written like five for these assholes#they just make me so insane#I’m literally not in control anymore#ficlet#destiel#deancas#supernatural#spn
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I’m so fucking disgusted with myself.
#mentally exhausted#i dont want to be here#im losing hope#tw depressing stuff#i’m so alone#self h@rm#mental health relapse#i hate my existence#anxi4ty#deppresing quotes
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