#i am very good at tl;dr

[ryttu3k]

Me: "Oh boy, a half-hour lore video on my most favourite blorbo! :D"

Youtuber: "Yeah I don't like them much."

Me: *DEEP BREATH -*

Anyway I wrote nearly a thousand words lmao. Not even as a disagreement, just an attempt to explain Why They're Like That! Reposting my comment below the cut for posterity!

"My very problematic favourite! I can understand why they may turn you off as a character, but I feel a good-sized part of their… messed-up-ness is due to the fact that they're centuries of trauma stacked in a trenchcoat.

Goratrix spending most of Myca's formative years trying to kill them? Traumatic. Being Embraced by Symeon, which, in mages, kills their Avatar, part of their SOUL? Traumatic. Being brought back to Constantinople? Traumatic on at least two levels - first, they're a native Carpathian in Constantinople, being constantly looked down upon just because of where they're born, and second, they're in the Byzantine Empire, but are most likely originally from the Bulgarian Empire. Who were sworn enemies to the Byzantine Empire, and who, over the next several years after Myca's Embrace, were systematically defeated.

And that's just in their earliest years! Then, there's 1204 and 1234. There's the intense betrayal of your own sire drugging and nonconsensually fleshcrafting you, and then being literally brainwashed into being another person altogether, and then being given to an actually insane methuselah as a plaything. The fact that Myca reacted SO strongly with terror and panic when they started remembering those dreams, and the fact that Michael knew exactly who they were while Myca themself didn't know, and the fact that they literally could not say no, indicates that, no, it wasn't 'Myca was Michael's lover', it was straight-out… that word you had to keep cutting out. Symeon buries those memories down. Okay cool great. They escape Constantinople. Good, good. They meet Ilias. They get to spend a few reasonably content decades playing with politics and being in a happy, supportive, loving relationship.

And then the torpid and disguised Dracon is dumped on them. And then they start having horrifying, impossible dreams, both of Michael and of horrifying violation by their own sire. And then they remember the events causing those dreams in full, while at the SAME TIME, Ilias is possessed by the Eldest, who uses his body to commit the worst kind of violation on Myca, leading to Ilias' death, or at least the death of his body (and on top of that, the novel pretty heavily implies that they had a mutual blood bond, so they FELT Ilias die). And that's the point that Myca changes from 'calm, polite, rather manipulative scholar and diplomat who genuinely uses Auspex more than they use Vicissitude' to, well, yeah. So what happened?

The Dracon happened. The Dracon was literally fused to them on a soul level. BJD says that they're 'freed from the maniacally bitter and self-destructive metastases' of their great-grandsire, and that pretty explicitly confirms that the Dracon had been influencing them all along. Myca was cool and analytical. The Dracon… had a temper (as Triglav found out!) and was fairly emotionally unstable, as well. That's a pretty potent combination to make someone who's very very good at analysing the best way to hurt people. On top of that, there's also Michael's 'infection', which may well have triggered when they remembered what Michael did to them in full - they've spent literal centuries under the influence of one methuselah literally fused to their soul, and another methuselah (who happens to have Presence 9 and Dominate 7) whose last words to them were to carry out his Dream. How do you even resist that?

So yeah, deeply messed up. But they have pretty decent reason to be so, being under the direct influence of two deeply messed-up methuselah, as well as all the 'regular' traumas of isolation, manipulation and betrayal by someone they loved and trusted, and the death of the love of their unlife. And that's why I love the story Dreams & Nightmares from BJD so much - it gives them another chance. A chance to actually be themself, for the first time in nearly eight hundred years, someone they haven't been since that night in the Oriol Room in 1234. Myranda Kalis/Sarro, who wrote the Dark Ages Tzimisce novel and that BJD chapter, is absolutely the best writer for Sascha, since she sees them as a PERSON who happens to have undergone unimaginable trauma, and not just a plot device for Ooh Scary stuff.

There's very much three versions of Myca/Sascha, really (four if you include their mortal years), and this is supported by the novel's epilogue, which has Dracon!Myca quite explicitly confirm to Velya that, no, they're not the same person now. There's Myca, originally from Romania, then Constantinople, then back to Romania. Kind of manipulative but nothing too outside the realm of believability for a 200-year-old Cainite. There's the Myca/Sascha who was infected by the Dracon, who committed so many atrocities (and who, let's face it, had the distinct downside of mostly being written during the WoD's most edgelordy phase. Fetus scene, I am looking at you!). And there's the Sascha that's left after the Dracon was torn away from them, who's now an entirely new person still trying to work out who the hell they are. And that's someone who we just haven't seen that much of yet, but who should, by all rights, be very different to the Sascha we've met before.

Everything we know about Sascha in the past almost isn't relevant any more. They are, quite simply, a new person now.

On a much more minor note: as far as we know, Vykos is pronounced 'vi-KOSH', and Myca as 'MEE-ka'. And that description in the wiki about how their skintone was retconned to fit their Hungarian origin is flat-out wrong, they're Romanian. The Magyars/Hungarians were actually actively invading the Carpathians at the time, and the Clan Novel Saga literally has them using ancient Romanian as their native tongue (with that scene written by Lucien Soulban, who also wrote Constantinople by Night and thus is one of Sascha's creators).

Anyway. Very long comment, haha. Like I said, they're my favourite."

...this is the second time I've answered with many hundreds of words of rambling on a question about Sascha oh dear XD;; (First time was here. I'll actually copypaste that too -)

"There are a lot of suggestions saying that they learned it in Constantinople, or from their Koldun lover, Ilias, but the timelines unfortunately don't really match up there - and Sascha explicitly knows Thaumaturgy, not Koldunic sorcery. This was definitely something they learned while in the Sabbat, most likely from the Tremere antitribu, and probably almost entirely as a 'fuck you' to Goratrix.

Pre-Embrace, they were a Mage of House Tremere, pre-Ritual of Usurpation. They were basically a prodigy, and Goratrix hated them, betraying their location to the Tzimisce in the hope that they'd kill Myca (their original name) for him, with a hell of a lot of bad blood between the Tremere Mages and the local Carpathian Tzimisce. Instead, Goratrix accidentally contacted Tzimisce in a war party from Constantinople, who, well, hated the Carpathian Tzimisce as much as the Tremere did, and Symeon took note of this Carpathian Mage and decided to Embrace them largely out of spite.

Myca was furious and traumatised, both because being Embraced as a Mage is really messed up (it kills their Avatar, which is sort of like a second self, and blocks them off from using True Magick entirely), and because they had effectively been captured by the enemy, both in a Cainite sense (with the tensions between the Carpathian and Constantinople Tzimisce) and in a mortal sense (Romania was part of the Bulgarian Empire at the time, and they were at war with the Byzantine Empire; a few years after Myca's Embrace, the Byzantine Empire would end up destroying the Bulgarian Empire, and all they could do would be watching helplessly from Constantinople as their home was destroyed).

So, Myca as a fledgling in Constantinople. They've undergone a deeply traumatic Embrace as a Mage, they've been captured by the enemy, they've watched their home destroyed from afar. And twenty years later, the Tremere, led in a ritual by Goratrix, become Cainites themselves, and start rebuilding the magic that had been stolen from Myca as a new discipline called Thaumaturgy.

So this sets up a new ambition in Myca - learn Thaumaturgy at all costs, and beat Goratrix at his own game.

This ambition is set up early, in Constantinople by Night (set around 1202), with Myca wanting to learn Thaumaturgy from Theresa Kymena (a Tremere defector). Theresa has her own stuff going on with the Salubri Achmet, so that... never really eventuates. By Transylvania Chronicles I, set in 1314, that ambition is still there: "Myca would dearly love to learn the Thaumaturgy Discipline, hoping someday to best Goratrix at the Tremere's own game." This, unfortunately, doesn't eventuate for a while - we get a full character sheet in Transylvania Chronicles II, set 1493, where their discipline spread does not include Thaumaturgy (it has, for reference, Animalism 2, Auspex 3, Celerity 2, Dominate 3, Presence 2, and Vicissitude 3).

The next character sheet we have is from Giovanni Chronicles III, set in 1882. And, by then, they have learned Thaumaturgy! Their disciplines are: Animalism 5, Auspex 5, Dominate 4, Fortitude 2, Potence 3, Thaumaturgy 4, Vicissitude 6. What happened to Celerity and Presence? We just don't know. So at some point between 1493 and 1882, they've started learning Thaumaturgy, with the most accessible source being the Tremere antitribu. When you're an infamous and well-respected Priscus in the Sabbat, I guess you can just go, "Hey, you, teach me your secrets"!

By modern nights (in Children of the Night, published 1999), their disciplines are listed as Animalism 4, Auspex 4, Celerity 2, Dominate 5, Fortitude 3, Presence 4, Thaumaturgy 5, Vicissitude 7. There is some retconning involved there (it drops Potence and restores Celerity and Presence), but does keep Thaumaturgy, and, more specifically, even includes the Paths that they know - Path of Blood 5, Lure of Flames 5, and Movement of the Mind 2.

So, tl;dr - they're over a thousand years old, which is a long time to learn disciplines. They have the means (Tremere antitribu within the Sabbat) and the motivation - their background has them wanting to learn Thaumaturgy specifically, due to their past as a Mage and their rivalry with Goratrix. They manage to achieve this some time between 1493 and 1882, and now they can make people's blood boil from within and cause giant magical fires."

[shivunin]

Hi, I just wondered what your favourite part of the Fenhawke romance was? Like, a scene/moment that really made you fall more in love with him? I love your writing so much!!

Oh, that is very kind of you to say! 💗I'm glad you enjoy the things I've written. I've really been enjoying writing for this ship, especially the past few months c:

As for your question...

Man, that's tough. I have a hard time picking one thing---I mean, *gestures to all the fic* you know? But I can narrow it down to a couple of scenes/elements:

The fact that a romanced Fenris still calls you "my friend" even after the act 2 romance scene. This is just...the bedrock of their relationship to me. Yes, that night went very poorly (understatement, I know), but at the core they are friends and he trusts Hawke in a way he's likely never had the cause or opportunity to trust someone before. I believe he never stopped loving Hawke, and it was a matter of laying those feelings out and understanding them one at a time. Romantic love not replacing platonic love or eclipsing it, but building or twining together is just... *chef's kiss* that's the good stuff.

The moment during the romance conversation in Act 3 when you can see Fenris go from hoping (painfully hoping!) that there is still some way he and Hawke can be together to actually believing it will happen. There is a shift in his body language that I could watch (and...have) over and over.

The element of choice? This is not going to be coherent, but the fact that he is learning for the first time what it means to have options and preferences, and he spends a lot of time exploring and understanding himself...and after all of that, the thing he keeps coming back to is Hawke. I think it's gorgeous. A song with refrains of pain or fear and choruses of decision and hope. He's loyal to a fault, in many ways, but understanding how much of himself exists to share and then still choosing to share it is just...man. I said this wasn't going to be coherent lol, so there you are. "If there is a future to be had..." like he doubts its existence but he's willing to chance it for Hawke. Man.

But, honestly? I've played DA2 a lot of times and never romanced another character, even though I've played through multiple romance storylines in each of the other games. I can't shake the Fenris romance. Every time I open a new playthrough, I tell myself that this is the time I'm going to romance Isabela, and every time Fenris rips that dude's heart out and I just......alright, yeah. Okay. Here we go again.

[margindoodles2407]

Something about wearing a dress and makeup and heels and doing my hair all fancy is like. Freeing. In a way. Like it's so different from my normal tshirt-jeans-workboots-bun-to-keep-my-hair-out-of-my-face vibe. But I enjoy it just as much. It's nice to be pretty

[blujayonthewing]

reading this book on urban exploration and also stumbling onto a youtuber who is doing (and explaining!) literal ancient alchemy is doing something to my brain chemistry (positive)

[the-rogue-mockingjay]

mods are asleep time to post o'ravmeric

also, bonus close up of o'ravi because she's adorable 💕:

[rosestthorns]

I wanted to get a physical copy but I just couldn't wait anymore. I caved and bought the digital to play it early.

Boy howdy, I feel like I'm about to cry. I've only played the first stage and watched the first cutscene but the amount of effort the devs put into every ounce of this opening is so abundantly clear. There was a care taken with this that it hasn't been shown in over a decade.

[indefiniteavatar]

So basically, in a case about him shoving money at someone so they shut up about him. . .he can’t shut the fuck up himself. I would say something clever and funny here, except the sad part is that this is just so normal in current politics that it’s just. . .not hilariously absurd behavior anymore? Not to say that it’s not absurd - it is beyond such, but it is just. . . predictable, I suppose.

I guess this is how I feel about politics lately? Either I get mad at everything or I try to laugh at everything and normally that works because politicians usually aren’t so tragically stupid so very often, but now I just kinda have to chuckle at the particularly eyeroll worthy things like this, and try to ignore everything else or my brain will explode.

[rahabs]

I've gotta say Hazbin Hotel is the last fandom I ever expected you to get into lol it seems so different from your usual style!

Very fair. I myself didn't expect to get into it. I found the pilot eons ago and thought it seemed fun, and then when the actual show came out to my own surprise I ended up really enjoying it.

Part of the allure is definitely the historicity of some of the characters, if that makes sense. Some are from eras of history I enjoy. I've always been big on mythology and religious lore and so Lucifer fulfills that role, while many of the characters coming from different time periods is also interesting to me. I also used to be a Supernatural girly way back when (this blog was named "gaaaaaaaabriel" for a long time and if you go back far enough in my timeline you will see the peak of my SPN days from 2011 to around 2014/2015--guess who my favourite character was), if that helps. I like the agony of immortals/high-ranking angels (and former angels). I also used to be a Hetalia girl from around 2008-2018, and I grew up with shows like Futurama, so I do appreciate fun adult animation programs and animation in general, they just never show up on here since this blog is more history-focused.

(I also never liked shows like Gravity Falls or Adventure Time or Steven Universe, though. Like, at all. My baby sister used to watch the former and I just could never get into them. I also don't like Helluva Boss--tried it and couldn't get into it. The character designs/characters/plots just weren't appealing to me. So that's just another reason for my own surprise at liking HH so much.)

To be honest, though, for the most part I am incredibly ambivalent to most of the characters. The three (or four) I'd say I'm actually interested in are Lucifer, Alastor, and Zestial (with the bonus fourth being Carmilla). I also want to see what happens with Lilith. Charlie and Vaggie and Sir Pentious are fun (Sir Pentious in particular being a former Victorian), but I'm not invested. I have negative interest in Angel Dust (part of that being how insane his fans are). Husk is incidental. Adam was fun, but I've no real interest in Lute. Etc. That said, they're all surprisingly well-written, and I've enjoyed the stories constructed around them, even if their characters don't necessarily appeal to me.

But yes! Very different from what usually appears on this blog, especially these days. I appreciate everyone for sticking with me 🖤

[reasonsforhope]

Given the misinformation that's been going around and will be going around, thought this might be helpful to some people

For a lot of reasons, I'm very good at this/at searching, to the point where I have worked as a professional fact-checker for two different publishers. So, here goes:

My Article Fact-Checking Protocol

Thorough Version

Read the full article. Keep an eye out for emotionally loaded words, and all-or-nothing language

Keep an eye out or anything that sounds too good to be true, and in contrast, anything that sounds so awful it must be true

Run the website/source through the amazing Media Bias/Fact Check. They'll tell you about a publication's bias and history of accuracy

Go to the website's home page and read through the headlines. Look at what topics they cover/prioritize, sensationalist headlines, and whether they're framing anything in a way that feels odd/off to you

Do a search related to the topic. This can be keywords, a question, or even just copy-paste the article title (Recommended: use DuckDuckGo so the results don't change based on what Google thinks they can sell you)

If multiple highly credible sources that say the same thing pop up, and there's no major societal biases that might affect the coverage of the topic in those sources (e.g. anything related to the Israel-Palestine conflict/Palestinian genocide, no matter which side), then I'm done!

If there are major societal biases, or I can't get a consensus of sufficiently credible sources, then I do some combination of:

(1) search the topic again + the words "controversy" and/or "fake"

(2) search the opposite of the topic, or do some sort of other filtered search

(3) look up a sufficiently credible news outlet with the opposite point of view of my source, and see what they have to say

(4) if it's a big enough topic, start by looking up 2 of the top national papers and 1 major paper for your region (I usually do the ones in the US, because that's where I am In the US: the LA Times, the Washington Post, and the NY Times)

Adjust "news" to "relevant type of source, e.g. tech, environmental" as relevant for all of the above options

If no red flags come up, and it's a topic I understand enough to smell huge bullshit,

Then I'm usually done!

If there are red flags, or I actually need a certain amount of detail/understanding, then it gets more complicated, but that would be a whole other thing to break down and such

or

tl;dr

Quick Version

Read the full article. Keep an eye out for emotionally loaded words, and all-or-nothing language

Keep an eye out or anything that sounds too good to be true, and in contrast, anything that sounds so awful it must be true.

If I don't know the website:

Run the website/source through the amazing Media Bias/Fact Check. They'll tell you about a publication's bias and history of accuracy

If I trust the source, but something else pinged my radar:

Do a quick web search to verify anything that sounds suspicious or too good/bad to be true (Recommended: use DuckDuckGo)

[strange-aeons]

Was rewatching the Snapewives video and realized I had something to contribute. I’m not sure if this was mentioned in the academic article but to answer the question “Why was Alan Rickman’s image was used to embody Snape?” I believe the answer is that Alan Rickman was seen sorta as a sex symbol by the demographic that made up Snapewives.

I am basing this off my mother who still says she thinks Alan Rickman was very attractive/sexy. My mother would describe herself as an intellectual and has the same ‘not like other girls’ perception of herself that many of the Snapewives seem to share. I think because Rickman usually plays charismatic villains/assholes and isn’t conventional attractive, attraction to him was something that made people feel smarter and more edgy than the mainstream. Additionally he was also in Love Actually and Sense and Sensibility which are two movies that are incredibly popular among the Snapewives demographic.

TL;DR: I do not think the Snapewives would exist if they hadn’t chosen Alan Rickman to play Snape in the movies. Because middle aged white women in the 2000s-2010s loved Alan Rickman. This is however mostly based off anecdotal evidence from my mother.

I think this is a very good hypothesis

[wetpapert0wel]

hey......what if. instead of tumblr making their own gaiaonline avi things......what if we just went to gaia online.......

[alexwilltellyouthings]

Hi queer fans of queer stuff! How are we feeling with today's TV industry? How about really bloody angry?

Look, the recent cancelation of Dead Boy Detectives is obviously personal for its fandom, but it's also one more nail in the coffin and I think we have to start doing something about it together.

I went through this with Sense8. With Our Flag Means Death. With smaller but also amazing shows like The Bastard Son and the Devil Himself. Not to mention when it's not cancelled yet but it's boycotted with seasons cut in half or zero marketing. *I am tired*.

If you are too, I ask you to join the campaign. This is specifically about increasing views and attention, not because Netflix is necessarily going to change their minds (we know that's unlikely), but because we want to prove that we exist as a group.

So even if you don't feel like actually watching right now, we ask you to give it a stream if you have a Netflix account, with headphones connected or low volume. If you don't have a Netflix account, and honestly good for you, you can help by boosting us in social media.

I do recommend Dead Boy Detectives for real, it's REALLY good, but this is more about joining forces. They want numbers, so we give them numbers in the most petty way: after they cancelled so that other networks will get interested. At the very least, the crew and creators might get some royalties and they deserve it after busting their asses for years to give us this season.

TL;DR: stream dead boy detectives as a community to shove it in their faces

[zombie-bait]

Went into The Penguin after seeing the trailer expecting Sofia Falcone to be some crazy minor antagonist who exists to just get in the way (*cue Gotham flashbacks*) and instead got a very powerful (and honestly quite justified) rendition of feminine rage motivated by betrayal, societal misogyny, gaslighting and isolation. It's very overt messaging, too. Her family, her coworkers, her friends, her city, even her therapist have all used her for their own means. You get to a point where you see that genuinely everyone in her life has fucked her over and she's not going to play by their rules anymore. And fuck, man, of course she doesn't take the high road but the one she goes down is not only satisfying but borderline righteous for the character and the audience.

On top of that, I truly cannot exaggerate how delighted I am that the show gave reasons to root for AND against both her and Oz. Neither of them are particularly good people but you completely understand where they're coming from and you find yourself wanting for them to succeed, even though one's success very much might mean the downfall of the other!! They have kind qualities alongside their cruel ones which work very well to humanize them.

With Oz, you understand what kind of person he is after only a few scenes. He will lie and schmooze his way to the top however he has to. He plays every side which puts him on the edge of danger and power constantly. Every time he's called out for not having a plan he doubles down on his confidence and acts scandalized even though he's absolutely talking out of his ass. He also takes care of his ailing mother and has spent his entire life being talked down to by anyone and everyone.

Sofia on the other hand, takes a while to unravel. And I love it. The point of her is that she's a mystery. A wild card. Slowly, you learn that she has ambitions, that she has suffered at the hands of others, that she has caused suffering with her own hands and that her family will never see her as anything but a problem. Visually, she is contrasted with Oz as smaller, frailer, younger. The narrative, like her own family, almost leads you to underestimate her. But with episode 4, the painting finally comes together. You see an ambitious young woman sharpened down into a jagged weapon and know that there is only one path left for her. You come away from the episode not feeling like she's an antagonist or a villain, but more like she's a secondary protagonist in a show that already has a fairly strong one.

tl;dr this show kinda fucks. The quality has surprised me in all the best ways possible and I'm genuinely excited to see more.

[heroesneedalancer]

Post by u/DJConvex to r/AskReddit on Nov 6, 2024:

People who work in DC for the government, what is the vibe?

Comment by u/Meduselde:

Resigned. We are generally very good about not discussing politics in the workplace but the vibe was obviously off. My more conservative colleagues who were happy Trump won were extremely respectful. There wasn't smug gloating and they were very obviously being cognizant of others' feelings even more than normal. It was extremely appreciated. Ultimately, we survived the first administration and will survive again. It's not necessarily Trump who was the problem last time, but his inexperienced senior appointees. The world isn't going to end nor do I feel democracy will crumble at his feet. It's just gonna be chaotic, and that's the worst part as a worker bee. At least with Biden we had consistent leadership and clear guidance, even if you didn't agree with it. Under Trump, your "yes man" says "no" and that's how you rotate through four SECDEFs. But as a sign of hope, it also means that even the most loyal DO say "no" sometimes, especially when businessmen are finally confronted with the realities of governance.

They chill out REAL quick on their dismantlement plans when they see the work these agencies do and what's at stake if they don't stand up for their people. It's easy to say you will dissolve or cut funding for something when you do not truly understand it. And as much as people say we can ALL be magically replaced with "yes men," even the most stone-hearted appointees recognize that the last thing you ever want is to lose the entirety of your skilled workforce. They learn it's best to get the skilled people to work towards their vision and not hire enthusiastic but stupid people to attempt the same. If they do, they risk looking inept themselves. You don't get skilled federal workers in a blue portion of the country to work for you by being a fucking Nazi. We're cranky and will make your life hell if you behave like that. I'm not talking about some sort of organized resistance movement because we feel like it. That's wrong. But just imagine hundreds of thousands pissed off at you. If that's the Deep State at work, then we aspire to be the quality of swampy Deep State your racist uncle thinks we are. If implementing dictatorship was that easy, Trump would have taken out every agency his last term and fired us all. I am actually extremely proud of the resiliency and checks and balances that the American federal government has in place to prevent most of the shit he says he can achieve by waving a magic executive wand. (He's done this once. He knows he can't. He just lets the majority of the population believe he can.) Us feds will make it, as we always have.

And we will live up to our oath to serve the Constitution, not a president. We serve every official of every party faithfully within the bounds of legalities and our oath. Working for administrations you may not like it's just a part of the job that we all recognize. Public servants at the federal level generally hold that extremely close to their heart. The ones that don't (I'm talking to YOU, WaPo "informants!") put us to shame. We're just tired, man. I can't believe it has already been four years since the last round. There's going to be some waves, no doubt, and some people definitely are going to be hurt at upper levels. But grab a Twisted Tea and buckle up. We'll at least pretend it's meant to be a roller coaster and ride it. TL;Dr Democracy is not going to die. But a drink and "thanks" would go a long way.

EDIT: Woah! I woke up this morning and am surprised by how much traction this got. I'm sad that this was the most positive thing some people had read. I'm sorry it's been that bad. I am not predicting outcomes. I have no idea how it's going to go. It's going to be bloody. But the hope I am trying to get across is that we are a resilient people and a group of (generally) good people. It will be okay, okay? The people that really make or break your daily life are those around you and your local government. Hold those around you close to your heart and always be kind. Everybody go outside, take a deep breath, eat something you love, and hug your grandma (even if she voted differently). The world is still turning and the sky is still blue. Being surrounded by spiraling anger on the internet only makes us the losers, not those we disagree with. The only thing we can do right now is wait. We have a few months to cool off! Enjoy your holidays!

EDIT 2: I think everybody has forgotten about this, but go check out the memorandum signed by the Joint Chiefs of Staff at the end of Trump's first term after January 6. The feds basically said "fuck that" when people were scared that the government was going to turn the military on them to help Trump in some way. While it was specifically addressed to our armed forces members, it was spread throughout the DOD and beyond. Partially as a result of federal workers' fear (not actually ordered, to be crystal clear) that they would be asked to turn on citizens. This sentiment was echoed across the entire government via internal emails (from Trump appointees!) as well to the civilian workforce. That's one of my proudest moments as an American and why I know we will get through it.

Emphasis mine. Link to original Reddit Post. Link to an article about the aforementioned memorandum signed by the Joint Chiefs of Staff.

Don't give up. We will get through this.

[mariana-oconnor]

Types of AO3 Summary

Option 1 - The Excerpt:

The quickest, the easiest! Find a section of your fic that contains the main premise of said fic and also showcases your writing. Copy paste that into the summary box. BOOM! Done.

Best used for any fic, unless it's so short the excerpt would be the whole fic.

Option 2 - The No Frills:

Just a description of the fic. No need for drama. No need to complicate matters. Keep it simple, keep it safe.

Example: "A short character exploration of Blorbo's thoughts after Daisy leaves."

Best used for short fics, poems and fics where the style/format is more important than the plot. Or fics that tie directly into a scene/episode from canon or another fanfic.

Option 3 - The Hook:

Draw the reader's interest by giving them a set up with no conclusion. Introduce the main character(s), introduce the status quo, describe an inciting incident, leave a question in the reader's mind.

Example: "Blorbo is a barista at a coffee shop, struggling to pay their bills, but after handsome rockstar Obrolb walks into their coffee shop they find that they have to decide whether a chance at love is worth the cost of fame."

Best used for mid to long fic where there's a strong premise and follow through. Especially good for AUs. Can be expanded for more complex plots or used multiple times in one summary for multiple characters or subplots.

Option 4 - The Sitcom One-Liner:

"The one in which [over simplified description of one of the main plotlines]" This is essentially 'boil your plot down to the very simplest statement you can, oversimplify if possible. The more bizarre or unhelpful the better.

Example: "The one in which Blorbo learns to like cake".

Best used for fics with at least a little humour in them.

Option 5 - The Rule of Three:

Three is a magic number. Find three key moments in your fic and just list them. That's it. Often ends with 'not necessarily in that order' if used for comic effect. If it's an AU, establish that quickly (i.e. 'Star NHL player Blorbo…').

Example: "Blorbo makes a friend, falls in love, and almost burns to death, not necessarily in that order."

Best used for anything, really. Three is a magic number. The human brain loves things that come in threes.

Option 6 - The Trope Lure:

Why bother describing the plot? We all know AO3 readers are here for the tropes. Similar to The Sitcom One-Liner just using tropes instead of plot. Often followed by the phrase 'that nobody asked for'.

Example: "The Space western / A/B/O / Mail Order Bride fic that nobody asked for."

Often tacked on to the end of The Hook or The Excerpt as a tl;dr.

Best used for fic that plays its tropes straight with no shame or second guessing.

Option 7 - The Pre-emptive Strike:

(Not recommended) You just wrote this fic, the self doubt is consuming you. You feel the need to apologise profusely for your existence for no apparently reason. You feel cringe, you think the fic is cringe, you want everyone to know that you think the fic is cringe in case they don't like it and judge you for it.

Example: "So I fell in love with this pairing and had to write this. It's weird and terrible. Lol! I suck at summaries! Sorry!"

Best used for no fics ever. I cannot stress this enough.

(Seriously, I am begging you, don't do this. If you're planning to use this option, rethink it and do one of the others. I guarantee you more people will want to read your fic.)

Sometimes added on to any other summary as a strange disclaimer. (srsly. don't.)

Option 8 - The Unapology:

Embrace the mayhem, embrace the deep dark depths of your soul. The opposite of The Pre-emptive Strike. A combination of The No Frills and The Trope Lure that truly gives no fucks.

You have committed crimes and you are proud of them. You know what your USP is and you're going to make sure your target market finds you. Look upon my works, ye readers, and despair!

Example: "There aren't enough tentacle fics in this pairing, so I had to write one myself!"

Best used for fics with controversial/polarising tropes with all relevant details already clearly stated in the tags.

Option 9 - The Interrogation:

What if you wrote a summary entirely in questions? What if your readers had to read the fic to discover the answers? Who knows what will happen if you do this?

Example: "What happens when Blorbo McBlorbo gets his wish and Daisy doesn't make it to the plane on time? What happens when Obrolb finds out? How will this change Daisy and Blorbo's friendship?"

Best used for... I honestly don't know. This style of summary does not vibe with me. Mystery fic maybe? Sorry guys.

Option 10 - The Multipack:

Got a bunch of shorter fics in one work? No way of summarising them all without a wall of text larger than the Great Wall of China? This one is similar to The No Frills in that you're not describing the plots themselves and similar to The Trope Lure in that often broader genres and tropes are mentioned. What links those fics? Are they all in the same fandom? The same pairing? The same challenge? Just slap that right in the summary. A chapter list with 1-2 word trope/pairing summaries can be included or not.

Example: "A collection of Blorbo/Daisy/Obrolb fics based on Tumblr prompts. Chapter 1: Regency AU Chapter 2: Werewolves vs vampires Chapter 3: Ghost!Daisy Chapter 4: Space pirates!"

Best used for (obviously) works that are compilations of fic.

Option ? - The Void:

I said The Excerpt was the quickest and easiest summary to do. I lied, well... I didn't exactly lie. What is quicker and easier than not having a summary at all? After all, that's what the tags are for.

Example:

Best used for... nothing? Write a summary, guys. Please?

[foone]

would i regret asking wtf the human domestication guide is

Probably not. And people keep asking this so I might as well give the tl;dr answer:

Human Domestication Guide is a shared setting of kink stories involving Dommy-Mommy plant-aliens who want to keep humans as pets.

It's almost universally dubcon/noncon, the protagonists are nearly always trans girls, it's heavily wish fulfillment. There's drugs (space drugs! Like regular drugs, but better) and hypnosis and a lot of kink even if there's entire stories without any "sex".

It's weird but endlessly fascinating (at least to me!) setting. It zigs in a lot of places that most erotica zags, in part because it's got this heavy wish fulfillment angle where it's just "aliens show up and they give you everything you ever wanted and then you have kinky lesbian sex" but it's also unusual just for having the protagonists being mostly trans women (and I myself am mostly a trans woman).

Anyway if you're interested in learning more, the setting has a nice wiki, and a list of Foundational Works that's a good place to get started reading it. It's a surprisingly active fandom! It's only been around a couple years and it's got nearly a thousand works on Ao3.

Sometime later I'll make a longer post that goes into some more details, or I'll release that 5 hour video essay I keep threatening to make.

One final thing: 95% of all jokes about HDG are on the word "floret". That's what the plant aliens call their pets. It means "little flower" (which is very cute!) , but it's also the word for the little bits of broccoli that you eat. So it's RIPE for shitposting and memes.