#and i do like dressing up anyway. i dunno my thoughts are complicated but also. not.

[margindoodles2407]

Something about wearing a dress and makeup and heels and doing my hair all fancy is like. Freeing. In a way. Like it's so different from my normal tshirt-jeans-workboots-bun-to-keep-my-hair-out-of-my-face vibe. But I enjoy it just as much. It's nice to be pretty

[ckret2]

Chapter 27 of human Bill Cipher trying to trick his captors into liking him, featuring a mall shopping trip that turns into this:

Also, Bill faces the most difficult ethical dilemma of his life: should he act like a big jerk to a 13-year-old.

####

As they left the cheap jewelry kiosk, Bill tapped his new dress shoe against Stan's ankle to catch his attention. "Hey. Your cut." He flipped a ring in the air.

Stan caught it and inspected the symbol on its surface. "Is that the Royal Order of the Holy Mackerel?"

"You gave your protégé your fez, I thought you might want a replacement! I know how proud you are of your lodge membership, Fisherman."

Stan admiringly studied the ring and its open-mouthed crescent fish; then the corners of his mouth turned down. "Ahhh, it wasn't my membership." He stuffed the ring in his pocket.

"No? I got one with the Fishmasons symbol if you'd like that better." Bill spun the oversized ring on one finger. It slipped off and he fumbled trying to catch it.

In the smoothest move he'd pulled all summer, Dipper caught the ring before it hit the floor. He ignored Bill's outstretched hand and inspected the complicated tool-lined diamond symbol. "Fishmasons? I thought they were called..."

"Yeah, you would," Bill scoffed. "Do you believe everything you read in The Paranoia Code? You know novels are usually fictional, right?"

"But don't masons work with stone? How does a 'fish mason' make sense?"

"If everyone knew what it meant, it wouldn't be a secret society, would it?"

Dipper gave up on prying anything more than snark out of Bill and turned toward Stan. "The Royal Order of the Holy Mackerel is associated with the Fishmasons, right?"

"Yeah," Stan said, "they're uh, sister organizations or something, I think. It's complicated."

"It's a spin-off organization," Bill said. "All Mackerels are Fishers. Once you've reached the top rank in the Fishers, you're eligible to join the Holy Mackerel."

"Yeah. What he said."

Dipper nodded. "Sooo... is it true that the Fishmasons are secretly... working with the government, or...? I mean, yeah, I read it in a book. But they've had a lot of real historical figures."

Stan snorted dismissively. "If they are, they didn't invite me to those meetings."

"Well sure. The lodge that decides politics is in D.C.," Bill lied. Dipper's head whipped around to stare at him. Ha. When they got home, Bill would have to spend some time deciding which would be the stupidest conspiracy theory rabbit holes to send Dipper down. If he played his cards right, by Thanksgiving he could have the kid spouting rubbish that would alienate half his extended family.

"Would you stop staring at me like that?" He shoved the side of Dipper's face; and, while he was distracted, grabbed back the Fisher ring to inspect its symbol. Kryptos's face. Far better drawn than Bill could do. And the thin little layer of gold atop the ring should be enough to enhance Bill's psychic signal. Maybe that would be enough to get a call through to the Nightmare Realm.

He tucked the ring in his shoe and turned to Stan. "Anyway, if you think that was good, you should see what I can do in a real jewelry store. What do you say?"

"I dunno. Jewelry shops are tricky, they're always on the lookout for shoplifters."

"They never catch teams and we've got two rambunctious kids to split their attention. I'll do the distracting, you do the lifting. When's the last time you had a gold watch that isn't cursed?"

"Nope!" Mabel, who'd been trailing behind the group with her arms crossed, finally shoved her way between Stan and Bill. "That's enough! We came here for a good time, not a crime time!"

"We came here to go shopping," Stan protested. "We're shopping!"

"Yeah, we're just getting the best discount possible."

"It's like advanced couponing."

Bill laughed. "Hey, I like that."

"No!" Mabel stood in front of them, arms and feet spread wide like a barrier. "Grunkle Stan, you should know better. You're letting—" she dropped her voice to an emphatic whisper, "Bill talk you into doing bad stuff. The whole reason you came along was to make sure he can't do that!"

Stan snapped, "Oh, like you didn't just make us stand around for an hour while you played dress up with him! Why's it okay when you play with the demon, but nobody else can make him useful?"

Mabel winced. "No, that's not... I mean..."

If this conversation went the wrong way, Stan and Mabel might both talk each other out of doing anything interesting with Bill. He'd better defuse this situation quick. "Hey, c'mon, Stanley, that's your niece. Don't be so hard on her."

There was a flicker of irritation on Stan's face directed at Bill, followed by a flicker of guilt toward Mabel, followed by him grunting and refusing to make eye contact with anyone.

That was one threat neutralized. Bill turned his grin on Mabel. "Sorry for monopolizing the trip, kid. We'll make it up to you! Fordsy got you that cute crystal bracelet, didn't he—wanna graduate to some real gemstones?"

"Hey, yeah," Stan said, immediately perking up. "You like jewelry! I can get you something with hearts or kittens. Way better than a bunch of boring rocks." Bill mentally patted himself on the back. Oh, he was so good at this. Good old sibling rivalry. Families were so easy to manipulate.

Mabel slapped her hand over the rainbow crystal bracelet mixed amidst her other bracelets. "I don't want you to get me real jewelry!" she shouted; but Stan had already set out on his new mission, with Bill trotting along just behind him. "Not if you have to steal it!"

"Relax!" Bill waved without turning around. "We're a couple of pros, you've got nothing to worry about." He elbowed Stan before he could absorb Mabel's protests. "Don't worry, once she's older she'll appreciate what a financial investment fine jewelry is. Never too early to buy a little gold. Or—well—acquire gold."

"Yeah," Stan said, "who knows when the next apocalypse is gonna be."

"Could be any day now," Bill lied.

"The only bracelet I want is this one!" Mabel waved her arm in the air, pointing at the shooting star friendship bracelet Bill had made. But Stan and Bill were too far away to care about her protests now.

Mabel's shoulders slumped. She glowered at the friendship bracelet. It didn't seem as friendly as it did when Bill gave it to her. "This whole trip was a mistake, wasn't it."

Dipper grimaced. "I didn't say it."

"You don't have to." Mabel sighed heavily. "I don't know what got into me. B—Goldie's been so nice lately, I thought he was making progress! But he's been nothing but a creep today. Guess the niceness was all an act."

"He can act nice for a long time. It took Grunkle Ford almost three years to figure out how evil he is." When Dipper concluded that this hadn't had the comforting effect he'd intended, he asked, "Do you wanna tip off security about the jewelry heist?"

Mabel sighed again. "No, I don't want Grunkle Stan to get in trouble. And if Goldie's arrested he might spill the beans to mall security. Let's just wait outside by the car."

"Yeah, all right," Dipper said. "If they don't come out in twenty minutes, we'll call Ford."

Headed the other way across the mall, Bill said, "So, a watch for you, a necklace or something for the kid, and for me... they probably don't have crowns here, so—"

"Whoa, hey, I don't remember offering to get you anything," Stan said. "I already got you fancy shoes and a bunch of clothes. We're square."

"We're no such thing. Besides, why should I help you if I'm not getting anything?" Bill asked. "Maybe earrings? Gimme a nail when we get home and I can pierce my own ears—"

His arm was wrenched backwards and he fell on his back.

Thirty feet away, Mabel yelped as she was yanked back and landed on her butt.

Bill and Mabel turned around and stared at each other.

Bill said, "Right! Forgot about that. Just—get over here."

"No!" Mabel shouted. "You get over here!"

Bill scowled. "Come on, kid. Your great-uncle and I are trying to do something here. If you don't want to come along, at least let Stanley have the other half of the bracelet—"

"I said NO!" Mabel planted her feet wide apart and tugged her wrist back as far as it could go. "You used me! You were only nice so you could go outside and I fell for it! As soon as you got what you wanted, you started acting like a huge poop face again!"

"Wow, language—"

"I'm not helping you anymore!"

Bill could feel his face heating up. "Kid, don't be ridiculous! You can't stand there forever! You're being..." selfish, irrational, petty—what word would get him what he wanted?

The pedestrian chatter over the inoffensive mall music had fallen silent. The feeling of being watched crawled over his back. (He seemed to discover another unpleasant new human bodily sensation every day.) Oh. Witnesses. There was no way the stranger in a shouting match with a little girl was coming out of this looking cool.

He could still save face if he got her uncle to do Bill's arguing for him. He turned hopefully to his new shoplifting buddy. "C'mon, she's—she's being unreasonable, right? We're talking about one watch, here."

And Bill had lost him. Stan's expression hardened. He crossed his arms and Bill flinched at the movement. "If a stupid watch is gonna upset Mabel that much..."

Families were so difficult to manipulate! Why did they have to gang up on him, it wasn't fair. He shot a furious glower at Mabel.

And then laughed, loudly enough for the rubberneckers to hear. "Okay, okay! You win. Sheesh, you look so serious. Peace talks in front of the Kidz Zone?"

Sternly, Mabel said, "Okay, but you do not get to ride the little coin-operated train."

"I wasn't gonna ask!" Bill paused. "Or the—?"

"Or the helicopter!"

Dipper called, "You haven't earned it, man."

"Fine," Bill snapped, "I didn't want to ride it." Swallow your disappointment, Cipher. Just play it cool.

When they'd rendezvoused, Bill said, "Okay, I might have gone a little overboard. Big deal. But we've been here all afternoon, we haven't eaten, I'm sure that's why everyone's so testy. Let's just swing by the food court and then get out of here."

Mabel frowned. "You're just trying to get us to stay."

"Yes. I am. So that we can eat before we go." If he ended this on a win, even a small win, that would be what everyone took away and he could call this trip progress. "Funny thing about human bodies is they need to be fed a couple times a day. Maybe you've noticed."

Dipper frowned. "Dude, you're only eating twice a day?"

"I don't question your diet, get off my back. What do you think, Stanley, feed the kids before we go?" Bill might've lost Mabel, but he had a shot at securing Stan. He could work on Mabel again once they were home. "You wanna drive home a couple of cranky teens, or a couple of cranky and hungry teens?"

Dipper snapped, "We're only cranky because of—!"

"Nah, he's right," Stan said wearily. "I'm starving. We'll grab something quick to eat."

Bill immediately perked up; but Mabel's frown deepened.

####

"I want chicken strips," Dipper said. 

Mabel said, "I'm getting pizza."

Bill said, "I want—"

"I don't care what you want," Stan said. "I'm getting a burger and you're getting the fries."

"Oh, so you want to find out what I'm like when I'm the cranky and hungry one?"

Stan grunted. "Fine. Your budget's five dollars. I really do only have a twenty."

"Fine." Bill drifted over to Mabel, who'd gotten in line in front of the food court's pizza booth. "Hey, Shooting Star—"

"Leave me alone, jerk."

"Whoa, am I not allowed to get a slice of pizza?"

Mabel didn't respond. She was glaring through the glass display window at the available pizza flavors as she waited for her turn to order. Apparently Bill interpreted that as permission to stay and look over the flavors himself. 

Standing so close to Bill Cipher when Mabel didn't want him there was like having a monster breathing down her neck. She hadn't realized how hover-y he could get until it stopped being fun. She remembered something like this from Ford's lesson on cults and con artists, how they try to get into your head by talking and talking and not giving you any time and space to breathe.

She could feel Bill's heavy gaze on the side of her face. Dipper and Stan were at the next restaurant over, but Bill stood between her and them. The chain bracelet on her wrist felt like a handcuff. She wanted to rip it off and be free of him. She wanted to go home.

"I've never had American pizza before," Bill said. "What do you think, cheese or Hawaiian?"

Mabel screwed up her face. "Ew, the one with pineapple?"

Bill's grin twitched wider. "Is that a vote for cheese, then?"

Gross, he was trying to get her to talk again. She glared at the pizza more determinedly. "Get what you want, I don't care."

Bill sighed. "Fine. You're no fun." He looked over the pizzas—standing too close—for one brief moment of heavy silence; and then, pointing between the cheese and Hawaiian, murmured to himself, "Eenie, meenie, miney..."

Mabel's whole body went stiff.

####

She felt the oppressive oven-like heat of Bill's dark floating pyramid, a too-euclidean temple built without the comfort of humans in mind, so hot that touching the walls burned your skin; and she felt a sticky sweat running down her back. She felt the constant electrical static of Bill's glowing shadowy grip around her waist. Every time she shifted and struggled, her sweater crackled and stung her. Bill's hand felt like nothing, absolutely nothing, and it was crushing and inescapable.

She could hear his voice, that forced jollity pushing to the verge of exhausted hysteria, saying, "I think I'm gonna kill one of them now just for the heck of it!"

She could see his eye like a blood red spotlight, eye like an incinerating laser, the light swallowing her and Dipper; she heard her heartbeat pounding in her ears; she saw the symbol that represented her flashing in Bill's eye, and even before he stopped she knew it would be her. 

"EENIE... MEENIE... MINEY..."

She saw his hand tremble with rage as he prepared to snap her out of existence.

"YOU!"

####

"Hey, you." Bill put a hand on Mabel's shoulder. "What are you getting? Maybe we can split two slic—"

There was a wild look in Mabel's eyes.

The moment she seized his upper arm, he knew he was ending up on the floor and it was going to hurt.

She spun her back to him, jerked him against her, and flipped him over her shoulders. It was bizarrely relaxing, that second spent floating upside-down in the air. Familiar, comforting.

And then he slammed back first on the tile floor. And it hurt.

He stared wheezing at the faraway lights until his internal organs remembered how to lung. The world was too bright; he'd lost his sunglasses. He sat up and gingerly felt the back of his head. It had cracked open, he was leaking internal organs—no. That was his hair. His head was fine.

Dizzily, he asked, "What was that for?" He shook his head to clear it. "Hey. Hey! What the heck was that for!" He grabbed the counter and got to his feet, and almost slipped back down on his first attempt. "I've been a little obnoxious but what'd I do to deserve a surprise attack out of nowhere? What, were you just waiting for a chance to get the jump on me—"

And then he saw the look on Mabel's face—the absolute unadulterated terror—in the split second before she gave a little flinch of realization and the guilt kicked in.

Baffled, he looked past her and the confused nearby mall-goers to Stan and Dipper—who thankfully didn't look angry, but they also didn't look as confused as Bill felt. They had tight-lipped white-faced looks like they understood what they'd just seen perfectly.

"What," Bill said. "What'd I do? Was it something I said?" He racked his brain. He did something that scared the dickens out of them—because all of them were giving him that look—it was three against one, something must have happened that he didn't pick up on. Something that made humans nervous that wasn't important enough for someone like him to recall?

He didn't know what.

That was it. He lost. All his work was undone, they were afraid of him again, they saw him as a threat and they'd lock him back up in the shack. There went any chance of ever seeing the outside world before his execution. There went his hopes of befriending the more pliable humans, or winning Ford back over. There went his conversations with Mabel. And he didn't even know what he did wrong.

If he killed Mabel and cut the bracelet cord, was he fast enough to escape before Stan and Dipper could react? If he lunged over the counter, could he get the pizza cutter and slit Mabel's throat before she flipped him again?

He saw a flickering glimpse of his uncoordinated scramble in the futures where he tried; the scene quickly fizzled out as he concluded it wouldn't work.

"Sorry," Mabel said. "Instinct. You know how martial arts are! You get it trained into your muscle memory, and... and... I... didn't mean to do that, that was my bad."

No less confused, Bill said, "Yeah, no, sure, it's—it's fine." He couldn't afford for it not to be "fine"; he didn't know what the other options were. "I know I cut an intimidating figure." He laughed weakly.

He couldn't apologize even if he wanted to. He didn't know what he was supposed to be apologizing for. He was still watching Mabel's face and Dipper's and Stan's for any context clues to explain what just happened.

And Mabel said, voice small and shaking, "You... don't wanna hurt us again, right?"

Bill blinked slowly at her.

It was the stupidest question he'd ever heard.

She had to know that. Everyone watching had to know that. Bill had been plotting how to hurt them again not fifteen seconds ago. He had every reason to want to hurt them—his very survival depended on finding a way to hurt them—and anyway, regardless of his intentions, obviously if he was asked he'd say "no," wouldn't he! As if he could admit to his captors that he did want to hurt them! It was such a breathtakingly stupid question that he could laugh.

He didn't laugh. He didn't point out how dumb she was for asking, or what a waste of time the question was, or remind her that they both knew there was only one answer. He didn't want to show off how effortlessly he could talk circles around humans; he didn't care about making her feel stupid.

He only wanted Mabel to stop looking at him like he terrified her.

So he said, "No. Of course I don't want to hurt you." He nodded toward Stan and Dipper, "No promises about these guys, they've been making fun of our fashion sense all afternoon, but... not you." He held up one hand, showing Mabel the friendship bracelet she'd given him with the evil eye beads. "You gave me a new job, remember?"

He'd hoped the jokey half-threat might help lighten the mood, maybe get her to smile; but she just nodded. "Okay."

Okay.

Stan shuffled his feet awkwardly. "Welp. I lost my appetite. We're going home."

####

Bill didn't care about Stan and Dipper glaring at his back as they trudged toward the exit, but Mabel walking so quietly beside him was sandpapering at his nerves. If he were back home and she were one of his usual pack of friends, he could just order her to perk up or else get out of his sight until she did—but that wouldn't work here, where he was currently not all powerful, he didn't have supreme control over everybody in the vicinity, and they did have to share a ride home. If he tried to get all imperious on her, she'd never speak to him again and Stan would probably break his skull.

What could he do to make her less nervous?

"Hey." He held out his hand to her. She gave it a quizzical look, then looked up at Bill. He said, "Can't hurt you if I can't use my hand, right? Unless you expect me to start biting."

Mabel said, "This isn't, like... a deal, is it—?"

"No! What? There's no deal, where would there be a deal?" Irritably, Bill said, "I'm just trying to help, if you don't think it's helpful then fine, whatever—"

Mabel took his hand. He shut up.

She flinched in surprise and pulled her hand back, holding the ring with the Fishmasons symbol. "I don't w..."

"I know you don't. Listen—we're all going to jail if we go back to 18th Century to return anything, but... I mean, we pass the ring kiosk on the way out, so..." Was that enough? Would that do anything?

She pushed it back into his hand. "You return it."

Irritation flared up his throat; he swallowed it down. "No problem." She was probably worried he was trying to set her up.

As they walked past the kiosk, he steered around to the side opposite the teen manning it; ran one hand over the rows of rings like he was idly inspecting the designs as he passed; and with a subtle movement, slid the stolen ring back amongst the others without pausing. He showed Mabel his empty hand to prove he'd done the deed.

As they moved passed the kiosk, she took his hand again. He squeezed hers back.

He'd find another way to get a message out to Kryptos. That dumb cheap ring probably wouldn't have worked anyway.

Dipper muttered, "You're still a threat if you have one hand free." He took Bill's other hand. They simultaneously shuddered. Never mind the being-watched feeling Bill had earlier, this was what the phrase "skin crawling" truly meant.

But Mabel immediately perked up. "Thanks, Dipper."

Oh! Sure! Thank him. Bill shot Dipper a dirty look and tightened his grip. (It wasn't even tight enough to hurt.) "I forgot how sweaty your palms are."

"Shut up."

Behind them, Stan grumbled, "I'm just glad you only have two hands."

"Hey!" Bill twisted around to give Stan an exasperated look. "Do you have any idea how much I envy you right now? This is torture. I can feel every fingerprint on these two. How come you're the only one who doesn't have to suffer."

Mabel laughed weakly. "Because Grunkle Stan never tried to end the world."

"Neither did I." He sighed exaggeratedly. "But fine—I'll take my punishment like an adult."

He'd gotten a laugh out of Mabel. That was good enough for now.

####

As soon as the car pulled around to the house side of the shack, before they'd even come to a stop, Bill unfastened his seat belt, shouldered open the door, and tumbled out into the sunlight and dirt. A couple of stolen shirts fluttered free.

"Hey!" Stan rolled down his window. "Get back—! How'd you get that door open?!"

"I never closed it!" Bill was already doing cartwheels across the grass, turned like a sunflower to catch the early evening sunbeams filtering through the trees. "I just pulled it close to the car."

"It was ajar the whole drive?!"

"A jar of what?" Bill's cartwheels were already better than the ones he'd tried earlier that day.

Mabel winced. "Sorry, Grunkle Stan, I should have checked..."

"It's not her fault!" Like heck was Bill letting Mabel get in trouble over one little door. "I'm an out-of-control agent of chaos! I'd ride home sitting on the roof if this body had the friction to stay put."

Stan snapped, "Next time, that's where I'm putting you!"

While Stan parked properly and everyone else got out, Bill got tired of cavorting and trudged up to the shack. He kicked his shiny new shoe against the wall as he waited for the Pines to let him inside.

"Glad that's over," Stan sighed. "I'm never going shopping with you again."

Yeah, sure he wasn't. Bill could work on him. Stan would want a new watch eventually.

"And I'm still starving," Stan said.

"Pizza," Bill said. Dipper and Mabel perked up like a couple of dogs that had just heard their owner say walk.

"Ehh..."

"Hawaiian," Bill added.

Stan looked considering. "I do appreciate pineapple's laid-back, tropical attitude." Dipper and Mabel groaned in disappointment.

Bill proposed, "Two pizzas."

The Pines and Bill went inside, and the door swung shut behind them.

None of the humans noticed the minuscule break Bill had kicked in the shack's unicorn hair barrier.

####

(Thanks for reading, y'all! I've been really looking forward to posting this chapter, so if you've got any comments or thoughts, I'd love to hear them!)

[feeling--pink]

Real quick I did @authenticcadence18​ ‘s DTIYS because I thought it was cute!! She has super cute art I’d highly recommend checking it out!! :D

Original under the cut btw!

[finniestoncrane]

Do u have like a ranking of the characters starting from your fav

oh gosh like as in the rogues (i hope so because that's what i'm doing now)??? i like a very specific set of rogues (although it gets bigger every day lmao) but you asked for it so i will not PUNISH YOU in ways you never even thought possible by rambling on for quite some time 💚 so anyway feel free to suggest new rogues to me or try to change my mind because i listed rogues i don't care for and ones i wanna fall in love with too u-u

ok let's start off nice and easy by saying i don't like catwoman. i find her hard to read, she's cold, she's mean and i she would make me cry. i hate her. and i also hate ra's al ghul god damn.

ANYWAY ON TO THE GOOD STUFF

Number One: The Riddler

my beloved disgusting green man 💚 there hasn't been a riddler i've met yet who i wouldn't kiss on the head and then fuck hard and long like i am obsessed with every iteration of him. you want me to rank them, i can't, but please know that arkham and capullo are up at the top fighting each other (shirtless, covered in oil, maybe kissing too i dunno, maybe not just shirtless either maybe we're talking just hanging dong, bouncing around all over the place, rubbing against each other I GOT SO DISTRACTED HOLY SHIT LMAO)

Number Two: The Penguin

just something about a silly little guy with a silly little smile and a silly little tummy that does it for me. this is very specific to farrell and gotham penguins but honestly, i've just finished reading one bad day and i'd fuck him too 💜

Number Three: Scarecrow

i want him so bad you don't even know, like i want jonathan crane to read me a book, then fuckin fear toxin me and then i want scarebeast to rail me sorry but i'm also not sorry. he also just seems like such a nice man which don't even come at me

Number Four: Two Face

such a handsome, handsome, charming, well-dressed man battling his inner (outer) demons like??? what more could you really ask for??? get you a man who can do both, be super smart and cutie and also absolutely unhinged and hot

Number Five: Harley Quinn

i struggled ranking ivy and harley but ultimately she's so cute and bubbly and fun and i want her to squish my cheeks and let me touch her butt, like i don't like margot robbie something about her bugs me but i still loved birds of prey, that's the lure of harley ;-;

Number Six: Poison Ivy

yeah yeah ivy is hot everyone knows it, yes cool eco-terrorism sure thing, but ok so also while we're here, fat ivy. fat ivy fat ivy fat ivy. i would sell my fucking organs to fill my grabby little hands with her body >:(

Number Seven: Victor Zsasz

love you chihuahua man u-u mostly gotham zsasz because he radiates mischief, just a cheeky lil guy, visiting his bub and getting ice cream with his pals, and he's so funny???

Number Eight: Victor Freeze

freeze gets to be ranked on my list PURELY because he's a mad scientist, he's nice to his wife (romantic what????) and MOSTLY because of that one shot of nathan darrows in gotham with the low-rise fucking trousers like good LORD in heaven the stranglehold that has on my clit you wouldn't believe

honourable mentions of rogues i kinda fuck with but not enough to rate or rank yet:

black mask, but absolutely the fuck not ewan mcgregor

mad hatter, i want to love you

joker, i hate him but i want to fuck him sometimes it's complicated

bane

professor pyg

hugo strange

solomon grundy

rogues i want to fuck with in future:

clock king

music meister

huntress

the creeper

batmite (what the fuck is he i love him???)

jeremiah arkham

flamingo

cluemaster

calendarman

firefly

hush

rogues i know but don't give a fuck about:

killer croc

manbat

clayface

killer moth

king shark (except i wanted to fuck him in assualt on arkham)

[inkdemonapologist]

[BatIM Call of Cthulhu Masterpost]

REMEMBER BACK WHEN WE GOT INVITED TO A MASQUERADE??? And we figured out the masquerade guests are definitely the sacrifice meant to summon their eldritch deity and that the party will probably be the location of the final ritual? ANYWAY WE’RE CRASHING THE PARTY, which means we need costumes.

The party is Alice in Wonderland themed; Sammy hasn’t read the book but got kin-assigned the March Hare by Joey, so naturally i’ve been doing nothing but drawing this loser in a dapper rabbit costume for an entire week

---

Anyway have a little smattering of out-of-context quotes from session 11

[Sammy is played by me, Joey is played by Boo (inkyvendingmachine), Henry is played by Maf (inkcryptid), Jack is played by Mochi (whatyouwantedmetosee) and Thren (haunted-hijinxer) is our GM!]

[Sammy] Sammy just has no magical powers. [Jack] YET. [Sammy] Yet. Correct. ...He doesn't want any. [GM] Half of him doesn't want any. [Sammy] That's... accurate, yeah. Half of him ALSO wants the OTHER half of him to stop having magical powers. [Jack] No Magical Girl transformation? [GM] *laughing* Is that what that is? [Jack] I'd watch a magical anime where the main character drugs themself and then becomes a weird... religious... madman! [Sammy] That does sound compelling! Maybe you should see if you can find a franchise that contains that element, and then become a big fan of it and draw a bunch of fanart for some reason. [Jack] Yeah, I dunno, I mean... it's so tiring getting into new media, I need to get a friend who will drag me into it. [Henry] And then you guys can start a roleplaying game with it and drag me into it! [GM] There's an idea! [Jack] Yeah! Someone should get on that! [GM] And if there was such a theoretical game... people might have to figure... what they're doing when they wake up!

[Sammy] We were put in a situation before where we were told that the only thing we could do was kill the host, but we found a way around it last time, [Peter] What way was that? [Sammy] Complicated.

[GM] Henry is the first to notice the apparent cultist, camping out, looking tired, trying to spot you guys. [Henry] Uh, Henry is just going to tap Sammy on the arm and point him out. [Jack] Bros! You've got to unionise! Look at these working conditions! [GM] Maybe one of these days you won't spot them, right? Hope springs eternal!

[GM] Okay, you can make an intimidate! [Sammy] Okay! *rolls* FIFTEEN IS -- this is the only thing Sammy's good at now -- fifteen is a hard success!

[Jack] I'm proud of him! [Sammy] Someone has to be.

[GM] Allison chats with everyone, and gets you into the costume room! Everyone seems relatively friendly! [Sammy] Except Sammy. Sammy doesn't seem friendly.

[Joey] My idea was, Joey would be Mad Hatter -- [Sammy] Because he needs a hat, [Joey] --Yeah, so he can have a hat -- I was thinking Sammy could be the March Hare, Jack could be White Rabbit, and then Henry could be the Dormouse, [Sammy] Yes! And then the Haiti boys are all the Mad Teaparty, which is great, because the Mad Teaparty is canonically trapped in a time loop. [Sammy] Because we tHOUGHT ABOUT THIS TOO MUCH,

[Jack] Kin-assign Pete! [GM] He's content to wear anything that looks like it fits him, as long as people aren't trying to push a co-ordinated effort. [Joey] (Pete can be Caterpillar,) [Jack] Catter-pete-lar [Sammy] Oh my goodness. Completely unnecessary. [Jack] This is a pun that Jack might make, out loud, to Pete [GM] Pete laughs, despite himself! [Sammy] I feel like, Jack would make this pun, and then Jack would be SO pleased with himself that Pete would laugh, because Jack was so happy about it. [Jack] Yeah that sounds canon. ....It IS canon!!

[Jack] You can like, actually pretend to be people who decided to come to this party to enjoy it, and not just steal and/or murder!

[Henry] I want someone on the help, because I feel like we would have more control if we had someone on the inside, [Henry] And Henry does have a very forgettable face, apparently!!

[Joey] What are the staff wearing? Target red shirt, khaki pants? [Sammy] Perfect! Everyone will fall for it! Based on my experience wearing red shirts into Target!

[GM] I guess this does mean Joey misses an opportunity to dress up Henry. [Joey] *excited gasp* Wait, wait, [GM] What? [Joey] Sorry, this has nothing to do with anything that's happening right now in the roleplay, but I just suddenly realised that (1) when Henry got married, was Joey his best man, and (2) did Joey get to pick out his tuxedo for him [Henry] UHHHH... I feel like, Henry usually defaults to Joey for outfits and stuff, but he would hesitate a bit to ask his best friend who has an obvious crush on him to help dress for his heteronormative wedding!

[Joey] There probably is at least one of the wedding photos where Joey is insistent on standing very next to Henry -- while Henry's next to Linda! -- but, [GM] ...but also, Joey is here, [Joey] But also Joey is here. [Sammy] ...absolute disaster of a man... [GM] But the tuxedos look good! [Joey] Yes. Henry was properly fitted.

[Sammy] I don't want a full-- I don't want a freakin' fursuit, because-- [Henry] (FNAF in the distance)

[Sammy] But I feel like, since both White Rabbit and March Hare are, like, dapper rabbits, they could do something like, yeah, splicer mask and also a hat. [Jack] I mean, Jack's not opposed; Jack likes hats. [Sammy] Jack absolutely should have a hat, I agree. [Jack] He's getting so many hats! So many hats, and so many boyfriends, [GM] He can't be stopped! [Jack] >:3c He shouldn't be stopped.

[GM] I'm still just stuck on the phrase "Dapper Rabbits."

[GM] If Joey and Allison are talking further away, I guess it's moot. Though Allison did see Prophet Sammy! He changed in her room. [Sammy] Well, nobody explained him to her. Sammy just showed up the next day and hoped that we wouldn't talk about it, and then we didn't! It was great. [Jack] Sammy's over here, hoping that Allison is distracted by Joey so that none of this conversation is being listened to, [Jack] MEANWHILE, smash cut to the other side of the room, where Joey is explaining SillySam,

[Joey] A lot of Joey's lack of giving information was to keep her out of it, and not paint a target on her back... but now? She has a target on her back, so... Sure! You can also sacrifice yourself, for the greater good!

[Sammy] I'm sure someone in this party will thank Allison. It won't be me. But I'm sure someone will.

[Henry] Henry's already smearing his blood on people, he's gonna agree to whatever at this point.

[Sammy] DEFINITELY not a cult, now hold still while we put this guy's weird glowing blood on you, it's fine. [Jack] Welcome to the flock!

[GM] What does this mean for Prophet Sammy's sacrificeability rating on Henry, though? Now he's potentially long-term useful... [Sammy] I mean... [Jack] The Prophet isn't here so he doesn't need to know about this! [Sammy] ...I feel like, if something has greater value, then it's an even more impressive sacrifice. That's why you sacrifice an unblemished sheep, traditionally. If it's not a blemish-- [Sammy] Like, that's most of what he was worried about, like, “does this make you not fit for sacrifice.” But if it's actually a really cool thing, ...!

[Sammy] Sammy's nervous. [Jack] Jack is also nervous. [Henry] Henry is also nervous! [Jack] Oh, that's always a good sign, [Joey] Joey's going to be confident! [Henry] ...Of course he is. [Joey] Someone has to be! [Jack]...is he "Confident" or "Confident (Fast Talk)"? [Joey] YES. That last one. [Sammy] *muttering* That's the best we got, unfortunately.

[Sammy] If Jack or Henry express nervousness, Sammy agrees with them. If Pete is nervous, then Sammy will very aggressively say that Joey knows what he's doing.

[Sammy] Allison, don't use a spell to bind people's souls together in order to avoid crunch,,, [GM] You never know when something might be handy! [Sammy] I mean, [GM] Waste not want not!

[Henry] Does Henry have to draw in blood on himself...? [GM] No, Henry has a lot of his own blood on his person.

[GM] Aw, man, Bendy should've commented on the rabbit outfits! I'm sure he'd find that hilarious. [Joey] ...why...? [GM] WHY? It's just objectively funny! No additional reason is needed!!

[Joey] Joey will go through his notes, and confer with Henry and Bendy on, okay, shall we try this, and see if we can help Bendy as well? [Henry] Henry is down to try! [GM] Bendy is worried about Henry overexerting himself. [Henry] ...Henry is down to try!

[Jack] Worst case, Jack looks at the symbol, and then he can be seeing-eye rabbit for the rest of the group!

[GM] Norman wonders what the plan is! [Henry] Bold of you to assume,

[Sammy] We're having such a good sleepover! We did a weird blood ritual, and we're braiding each other's hair~ [Joey] Having a fashion show, [Sammy] Yeah! We went out and got clothes, [Jack] Can't believe Joey called a boy, [Sammy] Gotta ask Joey about the boy he likes... wait, no, don't do that. [Jack] I'd say it's time to play seven minutes in heaven, but I think we, we did that early. [Sammy] WE DIDN'T DO A VERY GOOD JOB,

[GM] Norman wants to see how this plays out. [Joey] Okay, well, try not to get sacrificed, then, [GM] He laughs, and thanks you for the advice! [Sammy] *Hypnos Hadesgame voice* "Try not to get sacrificed, okay?"

[Henry] Allison is very helpful, and not weird at all!

[Joey] We already have the banjo case full of ritual circles, and Joey would rather have the emergency circles than Sammy carrying around bOTTLES OF INK. [Sammy] WHY, WHY WOULDN'T YOU WANT THAT TO BE HAPPENING? WHAT WOULD BE THE PROBLEM WITH THAT,

[GM] Make a sanity check! [Jack] Wait, what's happening? [Sammy] Joey was trying to think too hard.

[GM] Sammy does manage to catch that there's a little-- next to the kitchen, when you go into the place where they're serving food, there's a sign that says "Sheep Shop" over it. And there's a person wearing a sheep mask, handing out food. [Sammy] OKAY, THAT'S FINE,,, I don't feel like Sammy has actually read Through The Looking Glass, so I don't know if he knows why this is happening. I think he's just concerned. [GM] Excellent. Ideal response.

[GM] And Joey has NEVER seen the symbol EVER because he's incredible at not looking at creepy symbols! Which you wouldn't expect. [Sammy] I'm sure Joey will put this in his autobiography.

[Jack] :/ No Hashtag Gay Rights at this party,

[GM] Seems to be another party-goer; in fact, you recognise the voice! [Joey] Ohhh. Kyle -- I don't know his actual name, but -- [Sammy] (Dennis!) [GM] (Yes, that's-) [Joey] -- Kyle.

[Henry] Henry is going to try to sneak up on Moonlight while he's distracted! [GM] OH! ...Okay! He's very distracted, Sammy just screamed! [excited noises from everyone beCAUSE NO ONE EXPECTED THIS] [GM] You successfully sneak up behind him! [Henry] I'm going to grab the staff! [GM] Make a Brawl check, with advantage! [Sammy] (He has SO many limbs that don't work my dude, you got this,) [Henry] That's a success! [GM] You snatch it! [Henry] I RUN!!!

[Joey] We're just both escorting Jack, now. [Sammy] Would you say Jack is late, for a very important date? [Jack] Well YEAH, his Face Removal was scheduled like 2 dreams ago!!

[GM] He'd have to roll for it, to see if it felt familiar to his trip to Carcosa. [Jack] Extreme success! [GM] Then he would pick up that familiar feeling! [Jack] Oh, nice and homey at this party! Really nice. Nostalgic! It's been a while. [Sammy] Hm, [Jack] Maybe he should go play the piano, for old time's sake! [Sammy] NO

[aquietwritingcorner]

Flufftober 2021, Day 6: Fireman’s Carry       Word Count: 613 Author: aquietwritingcorner/realitybreakgirl Rating: T Characters: Heymans Breda, Maria Ross Warning: Summary: Maria is having a little trouble with her shoes. Breda lends a hand. Notes: This is my first time trying to write a Breda/Maria. I hope I did alright! I also borrowed a headcanon on nicknames from my friend @must-hate-dogs AO3 || ff.net

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Fireman’s Carry

“Ow! Why did I have to wear these things…”

Breda looked over to where he heard the grumble. He had been standing on the balcony of this ballroom, looking down over the gardens of the Armstrong estate, watching as people got themselves lost in the shrubbery. He had been half contemplating if he should start calling out directions to people when the words had caught his ear.

A couple of yards away Maria was standing, a hand on one of the columns as she bent to do something to her shoe. Breda thought she resplendent in her deep plumb silken dress. It had wide straps—or small sleeves? Breda didn’t know, he didn’t look that closely at women’s fashion—and a modest sweetheart neckline and clung in all the right ways. Her jewelry suited her well, too. It added to her beauty, didn’t take away from it like some of the other gaudy pieces he had seen here. Her look was a simple one, but that was because she didn’t need anything complicated to show how beautiful she was.

At least, that was what he thought.

“What’s going on, Dot?” he called out as he walked closer.

She looked up at him, still fiddling with her shoe. “Oh, Red. This is where you got off to. I was wondering.”

“Yeah, it got a bit stuff in there for me. Besides, it was a lot more fun to watch all the couples lost in the labyrinth that’s the Armstrong gardens.”

She snorted and looked up at him. “I bet it is.”

“Is there something wrong with your shoe?” he asked her with a frown.

Maria shook her head. “No, not really. I didn’t break them in like I should, and I’m not used to heels like these. They’re rubbing and it doesn’t help that I stubbed my toe. I don’t know why I’m expected to wear shoes like these, I can’t do anything in them…” her complaints trailed off into mumbles.

For a moment, Breda stood there, considering, and then, in one swoop, he bent over, picked her up in a fireman’s carry, and headed towards the stairs that led down to the gardens.

“Hey, what the—Red! Put me down!” She objected, not that he expected anything different.

“Nope, no can do,” he said.

“What do you mean, no can do, put me down!” She squirmed, trying to get him to let her go.

“Stop squirming, will you? I’m going down stairs.”

She stopped squirming, but she didn’t stop protesting. “Seriously, Breda, put me down!”

“Nuh-uh, Dot,” he said. “You were just complaining about your feet.”

“But I can walk! It’s just a stubbed toe and a couple of blisters!”

“I dunno. You are in a pretty important position. Better safe than sorry. I better carry you to the car.”

“In a fireman’s carry!?”

“I’m not carrying you like a princess across this ground and then trip because I can’t see my feet. And in that dress, there’s no way you can just ride on my back, unless you hike that dress up to your waist.” Which, actually—no, no, not the time for that. He wrenched his mind back on track. “So, a fireman’s carry makes the most sense.”

She had stilled by this point, letting him carry her over the dark grounds.

“Well… I suppose when you put it that way…” He could feel her move, almost as if she was looking back up. “That party was getting pretty dull anyway. I’m sure that we can have a lot more fun somewhere else. Especially if I can take these shoes off.”

Breda laughed. “I’m sure we can, Dot. We always do.”

[ag-celestina-gorillaz]

Daisies and Daffodolls Day 17: Book Series

Sorry I've been MIA a lot. I've been busy doing sewing stuff (next photo challenge I'll prepare a few weeks in advance). But anyways, I took a pic of Celestina in what would be her meet outfit. Celestina's story is different in many ways than other AG characters. For one thing, she's my Gorillaz OC as well, so her story involves some Gorillaz lore as well, and her story starts at age 11 in middle school in 2016 and goes to at least 2020 when she's 15. Basic outline, Celestina is a cheerful creative girl living in Orbitz Ohio. She was raised by her mom Sharon and her stepmom Mia, (they got married in 2015 when gay marriage became legal in the US), and her dad is Stuart "2-D" Pot, the lead singer of the British band Gorillaz. In her story, Celestina faces many changes, such as her Mom starting a new paramedic job, her dad returning to England to reunite with the rest of Gorillaz to record Humanz, as well as starting her first year in middle school. I'm actually planning to write a whole book, maybe more, about Celestina, and post the chapters here on tumblr. I think I'll go ahead and post the first chapter here as a preview, but I'll post the full story later, maybe with illustrations.

Summary - It's the year 2016, and Celestina is starting her first year of middle school.  While she's excited for a fresh start of the new year, she's also nervous.  School uniforms, more classes, more teachers, and new classmates.  Unfortunately, the school year starts out on a sour note, she barely shares any classes with her best friend, and in homeroom class, she gets paired up with Lucy Phillips, a cold, aloof, yet mysterious, new girl from Britain.  Meanwhile, things aren't easier at home either, her dad ends up returning to the UK to reunite with his fellow band members to record their next album, and her mom begins work at her new paramedic job.  But when Celestina begins to get close with Lucy, the new girl's iciness starts to melt, and they both learn they have more in common than they thought.  

Celestina's Family and Friends

Celestina Damon - An excitable 11 year old girl starting her first year of middle school in the year 2016.  

Sharon Damon - Celestina's mother, a practical, but cheerful, lady.  She starts working a new job as a paramedic.  

Mia Lucci - Sharon's wife and Celestina's stepmother, a funny and kind woman, she's always there when Celestina needs advice.  She runs and works at The Leaning Tower of Pizza pizzeria with her twin sister Gina.  

Stuart "2-D" Pot - Celestina's father, and lead singer of the British band Gorillaz.  He isn't quite wired like other people, but in his own 2-D way, he's very deep, and he's also got a big heart.  Despite the troubles that come with being a long distance parent, he loves Celestina immensely and tries to be in her life as much as possible.  

Kailey Green - Celestina's next door neighbor and best friend since childhood.  A smart and sweet girl, if a little awkward.  A self proclaimed theater nerd.  Often gives Celestina the nickname "Lessie".

Lucy Phillips - A new girl in Celestina's homeroom, who's family arrived from Britain.  She seems mysterious and comes off as cool and guarded, but in reality, she's a little shy, and becomes much kinder and sweeter once you get to know her.  

Chapter 1

New Year, New School, New Hope

The alarm clock on the bedside table chirped on and on as Celestina Damon slept in, nestled in her soft, pastel colored, blankets.  She was dreaming a wonderful dream; Celestina, rocking a sparkly, purple, galaxy print dress, was singing in front of a sold out crowd on her first performance.  Fans in the crowd were holding handmade signs and cheering her name.  Here she is posing for pictures with fans!  There she is signing autographs!  She finishes her last song of the show, wishing the audience a good night.  The crowd erupted into a thunderous roar of applause, fans shouting her name "Celestina!  Celestina!  Celestina! -"

"CELESTINA!!! WAKE UP!!!"  

That did it!  At the sound of her mom's voice, the young girl jolted up from her bed with a start. "Gah!" she exclaimed.  Her wavy blue hair was messy and needed brushing, and she was no longer clad in galaxy print, but rather, blue and white pajamas with panda bears printed all over.  Celestina ground the sleep out of her eyes and smashed the "stop" button on her alarm. 

"Okay, I'm awake Mom!" said Celestina, slightly irritated.  Her mom chuckled.

"Hey, if I let you have your way, you'd be asleep until lunchtime." laughed Mom.  "I told you not to stay up too late."

"I didn't stay up late!" Celestina protested, "I'm just, not used to waking up this early."  She was kinda right.  Today was the first day of the new school year, after three months of staying up and sleeping in later than usual, it can be hard to get back on a schedule.  

"Fair enough," said Mom, "but I can't always be around to make you wake up, especially now, you understand?"  Celestina nodded.  What her mom had meant was that she just got hired to work as a paramedic at a new ambulance company, which meant that some days she had to go in early.  Unfortunately, it also means that she would come home later after working many hours, some nights possibly after when Celestina was supposed to go to bed.  Luckily, today was only her orientation, which wouldn't start for a few hours, so her Mom could drop her off on her first day of school, but she was still dressed in her work uniform, black boots, navy blue pants with lots of pockets, and a wine red shirt with the ambulance's logo embolized on the left breast, and her curly blonde hair was tied up in a long ponytail.  

Speaking of uniforms.  Not only was Celestina starting her first day of school, but it's the first day of a new school, specifically, middle school.  Okay, so technically this school is a combo middle and high school, so not only does she have to deal with the 7th and 8th graders, but also all the high schoolers as well.  And all the students have to wear uniforms.  Actually, the uniform itself wasn't that bad, it was pretty cute, the top was a rich shade of purple with a white collar and ribbon, and a white pleated skirt that fell below the knees, had a "sailor suit" sorta look to it, kinda like what an anime character would wear.  All the same, Celestina couldn't understand why she just couldn't just wear her regular clothes to school, you know, like everyone did in elementary school.  Sigh, another change to have to get used to.  Mom caught Celestina eyeing her uniform.  

"Well get dressed, hon." said Mom, "And come downstairs for breakfast.  I think Mia made some chocolate chip pancakes!"  Mmm, just the thought of those pancakes made Celestina's mouth water.  

"Okay, you win." laughed Celestina, giving her mom a hug.  "I'll be down in a few."  After Mom had left the room, Celestina got dressed, brushed and pulled her long wavy blue hair into a ponytail, using a hairband with two pink poofballs on it.  Before she left to go downstairs, she looked toward the corner of her room, and saw Scratchy, her fluffy gray bunny, stirring around in her cage.  

"Hey there Scratchy!" she cooed, giving the bunny little pats.  She then slipped a little chew treat for her to play with.  "Be good while I'm at school, okay?" 

The young girl grabbed her backpack, filled to the brim with school supplies, and headed downstairs to the kitchen.  The aroma of chocolate chip pancakes and maple syrup filled the room.  Mom had seated herself at the kitchen table, eating her small stack of pancakes, and Mia, Celestina's stepmom, was busy flipping the pancakes at the stove.  Her mother, Sharon, and Mia have only been married for less than a year, but Mia has lived with Celestina and her Mom her whole life.  They probably would have married sooner had it been allowed before last year!  Mia is a pretty lady, tall, tan skin, and shiny dark brown hair, and she's a great cook.  Her and her sister Gina (Aunt Gina to Celestina), run a pizza place called Leaning Tower of Pizza.  

"Pancakes, comin' up!" shouted Mia to Celestina.  Mia still spoke with a New York accent, despite the fact that she's been living in Ohio for at least 15 years.  She served the girl her pancakes before sliding her own onto a plate.  Celestina took her breakfast to the table and poured on the sweet maple syrup.  She cut a piece and took a bite, mmmm, was so good.  Her smile fell slightly looking around the room.  She couldn't get used to the empty space at the table.  

"What's wrong?" asked Mia, noticing Celestina's frown, "Don't you like chocolate pancakes?"

"I LOVE them!" exclaimed Celestina. "I just wish Dad was here to have some."  Mia and Susan exchanged a look of understanding. 

"You miss him don't you." said Mia.  Celestina nodded. 

"Yup!" said Celestina.  It was actually more than that.  She paused a bit, trying to think of how to put it into words, "I mean, I dunno, I guess I'm also a bit worried, you know, about him leaving again."  Celestina's eyes looked down at her pancakes.  Talking about stuff like that always made her uneasy.  

Celestina's dad, her whole family life in general really, was, well, unusual to say the least.  For one thing, her parents weren't married when her mom had her, in fact, they split up shortly before Sharon found out she was pregnant.  Whatever, no biggie, there are lots of kids whose parents are like that, people who have children before they got married, or had kids and didn't stay together.  However, it was even more complicated in Celestina's case, because her mom is American and her dad is British, meaning it's harder for her to see her dad on a regular basis because he lives so far away.  Also, her dad is famous.  Celestina's father is none other than Stuart Pot, better known as 2-D, the lead singer of Gorillaz.  Yes, that 2-D!  It's been awhile since the band did any songs together though, the last album, Plastic Beach, was released when Celestina was 5, but a couple years before that, something else happened, and that's what worried Celestina.  For a short while after Celestina was born, 2-D would often call the house to say hi, sometimes even visit.  But after a visit that Dad made sometime when she was 3, he had gone on a trip somewhere, and suddenly vanished.  Her mom tried to keep calm around her when she asked where Dad was, but even as a kid, Celestina could kinda tell that her Mom was worried about him.  The sudden release of a new Gorillaz album didn't help either.  At one point, her Mom told her stories that 2-D and Murdoc Niccals, the band's foul mouthed, green skinned, bassist, were taken by pirates and trapped on an island called Plastic Beach, an island in the middle of the ocean made of garbage and spray painted pink.  Looking back, Celestina wasn't sure if this all really happened or if this was something Mom was making up, but she knew something happened that made her dad unable to contact her for awhile.  Shortly before Celestina was 8, her dad had called her on the phone for the first time in years.  

"Celestina, is that you?" said 2-D in his thick Londoner accent, "You sound so big!  How old are you now?"

"I'm gonna be 8, Dad!" answered Celestina proudly, "I'm a big kid!" 

"8!?  Wow!  You really grew up!" exclaimed 2-D, Celestina could hear the tears caught in his throat. "I've missed you so much!" 

After a brief vacation, or "holiday" as her dad called it, in Guadalupe, he visited Celestina and the family for the first time in a while, right in time for her 8th birthday.  And since then, he had been able to keep in better contact, and came to visit Celestina in person more often these last few years, as if to make up for missing out for those last 5 years.  She even got to fly with him to England one time and met her grandparents, David and Rachel Pot, for the first time at the amusement park that Grandpop had owned.  This year, 2-D stayed in the guest room for a few months, he was able to keep Celestina company during the summer while Sharon was taking paramedic classes, and Mia was working at Leaning Tower.  2-D had been helping Celestina with her budding interest in music, teaching her how to play her new blue Melodica, a small keyboard with a flute-like pipe in it.  When they weren't practicing, the father daughter duo would watch scary zombie movies, or listen to some older Gorillaz songs on Celestina's old CD player.  On June 23rd, the whole family, and a few of Celestina's friends from school, celebrated her 11th birthday with a bonfire cookout in the backyard.  It was a wonderful summer.

But all this fun and excitement of summer had to come to an end.  It was now time for school, and just as well, Dad left to go back to England, rather suddenly at that.  Somehow, one of his old band mates, Noodle, the guitarist and the only girl in the band, (and Celestina's favorite band member, next to Dad of course), ended up getting back in contact with him.  Apparently, the band was getting back together to make a new album called Humanz, which would be released sometime next year.  Like always, Celestina was sad to see him leave, but she was also worried too, maybe because a part of her is scared he would go missing again.  

Sharon put a comforting hand on Celestina's shoulder.  "It'll be okay," she reassured her daughter, "He said he's gonna text us when he arrives to meet the others.  Plus, he said you can visit him during spring break."  

"I know," nodded Celestina.  She finishes up her pancakes, thinking about everything going on.  Mom's starting a new job, Dad's going back to England, I'm starting a new year in a new school, and we have to wear uniforms!  So far so good, she thought sarcastically.  She rinsed her dirty plate in the sink and slipped on her black flats to meet Mom out in the car.

"Are we taking Kailey today?" asked Mom.  Kailey Green is Celestina's best friend and next door neighbor.  

"No, Mrs. Green wanted to take her this morning," answered Celestina, "but she's picking both of us up after school."

"Okay, good," said Mom, "let's get going, you don't wanna be late," she checks her watch "and neither do I!" she laughed.  Celestina gave Mia a hug goodbye.

"Have a good day at school, rockstar." said Mia lovingly.  "I'm coming home from Leaning Tower about an hour after you get home from school, okay girlie."

"'Kay 'kay, I got it." smiled Celestina.  She gives Mia a fist bump, complete with a little explosion sound effect.  

"You have a good day at school," then she turns to Mom "And good luck with orientation Sharon."  Mom gives Mia a loving kiss on the cheek.  

"Bye honey," said Mom grabbing her keys.  "I should be home by dinner tonight."  Celestina and her mother wave goodbye to Mia before getting in the car.  As Sharon drove on to the school, Celestina sat in her seat nervously, her breakfast doing flip flops in her stomach.  

"Are you doing okay back there?" asked Sharon, looking at her daughter in the rearview mirror.

"I dunno," she answered.  "Honestly, I'm pretty nervous.  Middle school sounds kinda scary.  All these classes, new teachers, ugh, no recess, school uniforms," she grimaced.  She had so many thoughts, so many "what-if's", that they started coming out one after another.  "What if I don't like my teachers?  What if me and Kailey don't have any classes together?  What if all the classes are too hard?  What if I get bullied by the older kids?  What if -" 

"Celestina!" said Mom suddenly, "sweetie, sweetie, it's alright." She took a deep breath before continuing, "I know this isn't something you want to hear, but I kinda know how you feel.  I was nervous starting middle school when I was your age.  And, if I'll be fully honest, I can relate to how you're feeling right now.  I'm a bit nervous starting this new job."

Celestina looked up in surprise, "You are?" she wondered.  "But you said you were excited."  Mom gave Celestina a loving smile.

"And I am," answered Sharon, "But I have so many mixed feelings.  I'm worried I won't be good enough, I'm worried the boss could be a jerk, or that I won't like my co-workers.  So many things can go wrong.  But," she paused before continuing, "There are also good things I'm looking forward to as well.  I'll be able to use the skills I worked hard learning in all these classes, I'll be able to help people, I'll be bringing home a little more money, which means we will be able to go out more often." she said with a smile.  "It's normal to be scared and nervous, it's okay in fact.  But you also have so many good things to look forward to.  Yes you have more classes, but you get to have more classes you enjoy, like music and art.  And even if you don't have any classes with Kailey, you'll always be able to see her because we're neighbors.  If you're having a problem, whether it's classes, mean kids, or even a mean teacher, you can always come to me or Mia.  I just want you to know, even if the bad things do happen, there are also a lot of good thing to come, I want you to remember that."  Celestina thought over what her mom had said.  She did have a few good points.

"I did hear that the music department puts on a school musical every year," said Celestina, feeling a bit more hopeful, "And there's all these fun clubs".  Sharon's eyes lit up.  

"See, there you go!" said Mom. 

"It just seems like so many things are changing at the same time." Celestina admitted, "it just feels so fast, I feel like I can barely take a breath."  

"I know, it sucks, it really does." said Sharon in an understanding tone.  "The funny thing is, is that the only thing that never changes, is that everything changes."

"That's so confusing to think about!" said Celestina laughing.  

"Ah, but that's the truth," said Sharon with a chuckle.  "But you know what else will never change?"

"No what?" asked Celestina.

"I'll always love you," Mom answered warmly, "The same goes for Mia, and for your dad, we will never stop loving you.  You are our child, and nothing will ever change that."  

"Aw mom, I love you too!" she exclaimed.  At that moment, Celestina's cell phone chirped with a new message.  Oops, better silence it before class, she thought, making a mental note.  But seeing who the message was from made her smile.  

"Ooh I got a text from Dad!" shouted Celestina in excitement.  The text read "i made it to studio 13 in london.  about to start recording for the new album.  I miss you already, but i'm happy to be home again.  russ, noodle and murdoc say hi.  say hi to your mum for me.  love you little panda bear."  Celestina smiled at the mention of the special nickname her dad gave her.  Attached with the message was a picture.  It was a group photo of the whole band in what looked like the inside of a recording studio.  Celestina had yet to meet the other band members in person, but she knew who they were from the music videos and interview clips on YouTube, and from a few stories from her dad.  There was Murdoc Niccals, the band's bassist, and probably the biggest troublemaker of the band.  He has an odd scrunched up nose, and green skin and black hair, sorta made Celestina think of the Gangreen Gang from The PowerPuff Girls.  Then there was Russel Hobbs, the drummer, a heavyset black man from New York, with bright white eyes lacking pupils, a result of being possessed by a demon when he was young.  He seemed to be the voice of reason in the band, and when he speaks in interviews, he has a gentle voice.  Then there was Noodle, the guitarist, and the only girl in the band.  Celestina almost didn't recognize her at first, she's so used to seeing her in the music videos back when she was a kid or a young teen, and now she's a beautiful grown up woman!  Noodle was not much older than Celestina is now when the band released their first album, and according to her dad, when they were first looking for a guitarist, Noodle traveled from Japan all the way to England, in a FedEx delivery crate, and gave such an epic explosive guitar solo, that the band ended up giving her the part on the spot.  Celestina likes to imagine that if they were the same age, she and Noodle would be great friends.  And in the middle of the pic was her dad, 2-D himself.  He's tall and wiry, the tallest of all the band members in fact, he has spikey blue hair, and due to two separate car accidents (which were Murdoc's fault), he lost his front tooth, and his eyes were injured, they now look like blank black circles.  Murdoc gave him the nickname 2-D because his black eyes made it look like he had "two dents'' in his head.  Surprisingly, her dad liked that nickname, at this point, the only people who really call him Stu anymore would be Nana and Grandpop, as well as Sharon and Mia.  People would often describe her dad as, well, not very bright, sometimes saying he's thick and calling him names like "space cadet", but Celestina doesn't like any comments like that.  To Celestina, her dad has his own 2-D way of thinking, and his creativity with making music is where he shines the best, and he's got a kind heart.  In the attached picture, all four band mates were smiling (even Murdoc), and that made Celestina happy, seeing her dad and his old friends all back together.  

"That's great!" said Mom, "What does the message say?" 

"Dad said he got to England safely, he's excited to work on songs again, and that he loves and misses me, plus he sent a pic of him and the rest of the band." said Celestina.  "Oh yeah, Dad says hi, and so does Russ, Noodle, and Murdoc."

"Aw that's awesome!" replied Mom, "See, I figured he would make it there okay.  How do the other three look?"

"Murdoc is as green as ever," Celestina replied with a laugh, "Russel pretty much looks the same, but Noodle looks so different!  She's a grown up lady!"

"Yup, I believe it," said mom with a chuckle.  "Oh man, I haven't seen her since you were a baby, she was still a teenager then.  Grown up so fast, both of you." she said with a sigh.  "It's good they seem to be doing well." She paused, thinking, "I got an idea.  We're almost there, why don't we take a few back-to-school pictures of you when we get there, and you can text them back to your dad?"

"Ooh I'd love that!" said a delighted Celestina.  She was quiet for a bit before continuing.  "Hey, I know I was sad before with Dad leaving, but, well, it's also really cool that the whole band is back together and they'll make more songs again."

"I know, I can't wait to hear them," agreed Mom, "but like I said earlier, it's okay to feel sad about missing him.  Just don't forget that there are also a lot of good things to look forward to."

"I understand," answered Celestina.  Mom had just pulled up to the school.  There it was, Orbitz Public School.  Mom was lining up to park at the entrance where the middle school classes were.  While Celestina had seen the school many times when going on errands with her mom's around town, today the building somehow seemed larger and more intimidating.  Her breath slowed down and her hands grew sweaty the closer they got to the entrance.  Mom had found a parking spot and Celestina nervously left the car, carrying her backpack.  

"This place is way bigger than South Lincoln," remarked Celestina, referring to her elementary school.  Sharon gave Celestina's hand a comforting squeeze.

"I know it's scary," said Mom. "But you got this."  Even though Celestina was still nervous, she somehow felt a bit better with her Mom hyping her up.  

"I got this!" repeated Celestina.

"You're the star of your own stage," encouraged Sharon, "You knock 'em dead!"

"I'll knock 'em dead!" repeated Celestina, feeling pumped.  "Oh yeah, let's get that picture taken to send to Dad" she remembered.  Celestina and Sharon walked around to find a spot with good lighting in the courtyard. 

"Ooh, we can take one here," said Celestina, handing the phone to her mom.  She struck an adorable Sailor Moon style peace sign pose in her new uniform with the school in view in the back.  After the picture got taken, she felt a gentle tap on her shoulder.

"Huh," said Celestina, before turning around to see her best friend, "Oh hey there Kailey!"

"Hi Lessie!" greeted Kailey, using the nickname she used for Celestina since they were little.  Kailey was wearing the same purple and white school uniform that Celestina was wearing.  She kept her short brown hair in her natural curls, and her red square glasses framed her blue eyes.  The giggly girls greeted each other with a hug, before realizing that both their moms were standing by with their phones.  

"Smile you two," said Mrs. Green.  Both girls smiled for the camera with their arms around each other.  

"Perfect!" exclaimed Sharon before handing Celestina her phone back.  Celestina then quickly sent both the pics to her dad with a special message.

"So glad you made it home safely Dad.  Mom and Mia say hi back.  Today is me and Kailey's first day of school.  Can't wait to see you again, and maybe meet the rest of the band (even Murdoc lol).  Have fun recording.  Love you lots!  We got this!"

Shortly after she sent it, her dad replied with another quick "I love you", and Kailey got Celestina's attention.

"C'mon Lessie," said Kailey, "We still need to get our schedules."

"Oh my, that's right!" exclaimed Celestina.  "We gotta get going!"  

The girls gave their Moms a quick hug and said goodbye, and headed into the school.  Celestina still felt a bit nervous, but she felt a lot better than this morning.  She headed inside the front doors of the school with Kailey, walking through the purple and white crowd of students, feeling determined to take on the day no matter what happens.  

"Celestina, you're on!" 

[stevenbasic]

“Oh good god…” I muttered to myself, scrolling to the new pic Melissa had posted, just an hour ago, “what the fuck is she doing..?” I’d finished my sad little meal, at my sad little table, and now sat on my sad little couch in my sad little apartment, and knew - despite the disquiet this post brought me - I’d need to unzip and-

<knock knock> came a rap on the door. 

Who the..?? It was 9pm, on a Tuesday night. Who would be...knocking...now?!? No one knows I’m even here unless it’s…

I dropped my phone, jumped up off the old green cushions, and tucked everything back. 

...Sheryl??

Could it be her? Here to talk? Maybe start to fix things? In a rush of anxiety, I looked about. The harsh fluorescents of the overhead room lights were off, the main illumination in the room cane from a cheap gooseneck floor lamp aside the couch, painting shadows onto the far wall. I’d cleaned up a bit...if by cleaned I meant pushed aside most of the cardboard boxes holding my roughly-packed stuff. I wanted the place to look nicer if this was indeed my newly-estranged wife but nonetheless I stepped towards the door, reaching out my hand for the knob, when I heard the voice:

“Dr JJJJJJJ….” it came, unmistakably both nasal and smoky - and then a series of new knocks, “...let us innnnnn….”

Oh no. Randi. 

My heart stopped, sank, then picked up. Randi?!? How did she know I was here?!? I hadn’t said a word to anyone in the office and now-

I looked through the peephole: 

There’s three of them!!?!

Randi, Josie and Lakshmi, all dressed up for a night out, two of them carrying what looked like trays of food, and all giggling wide-eyed in the hallway outside my “secret” apartment…not so secret anymore, I guess. I had wanted, for as long as I could, to keep this all hush-hush. I didn’t want anyone at work to know that Sheryl and I had separated, that she’d thrown me out of the house, that I’d be living for the time being in a pathetic little apartment above the office. But, it seemed, my secret was out. And if these three knew, I thought with a shiver, Melissa must-

“C’mon..!” Randi demanded, her face abruptly filling my entire view through the peephole, as she tried to gaze through it herself from the other side, “Let us in!!”

Oh Jesus. 

Knowing I shouldn’t, I found myself opening the door. “Hi, uh- how..?”

In a moment, the girls were inside: first Josie, then Lakshmi, then Randi. I was shocked as - parading past me with their party heels on - they were each at least as tall as me, Josie and Randi certainly taller. I tried to hide my dismay, and acutely felt my lost inches as they strutted into my space. Randi eyed me up and down, and aside from feeling short I suddenly also felt silly, dressed for bed already in my thin cotton shorts and grey tee shirt while they were all made up to the nines, hair and make-up. “We heard Sheryl kicked you out,” Randi said, bluntly, as she and the others glanced around the room, taking it in, in all its...meagerness, “so we brought some food.” The look on their faces, as they scanned the bare walls, the crummy furniture, was a mix of distaste (Josie), pity (Lakshmi), and amusement (Randi). “Well, I can't cook,” Randi added further, “so I just dressed up pretty.”

She certainly was, uh...dressed pretty, all three girls were. Party dresses on them all, each one smaller and tighter than the next. Randi’s, a sleekly strapless black number that ran high up her shapely thighs and showed off the top shelf of two surprisingly full breasts, was the raciest of the bunch. 

As if catching my eyes roving Randi, Josie tossed her long, silky, brown hair and spoke up. “Don’t you like Lakshmi’s dress too?” she said, “We’re taking her out dancing. I let her borrow it.” As I admired the fit of Lakshmi’s form-fitting, sleeveless minidress - orange and grey with criss-crossing stripes - Josie continued. “Mimi, show him how nice your ass looks... ” Lakshmi looked shy but obviously proud as she turned, swiveled her womanly hips in a liquid, casually sultry move, one I didn’t think she’d be capable of, and giggled. Her rear was much larger than I’d imagined, maybe just accentuated by her four-inch heels and the way her dress clung to her narrow waist. Anyway, it looked round and shapely and soft and the way it rolled...god, this is Lakshmi?? Where had she been hiding that thing??

“We’re due at the club soon…” Randi explained, obviously ignoring my near-outright leering of her friend, primping her own hair in the cheap, plastic-framed mirror on the back of the door, “...but we wanted to stop by here first...” 

“...in case you were lonely...” Josie continued, smiling at me with a mischievous glint in her eye. 

“...or hungry…” Lakshmi offered, having turned back to me with her plate of food, covered by tin foil. In the meantime Josie had placed her tray down on my little coffee table, and was competing with Randi for space in the mirror, adjusting the fit of her ensemble. From behind, both other girls were no slouches either. Josie in particular had a remarkably fine butt, high and round and obviously gym-toned. She looked coltish in her tight little dress of scalloped orange chiffon, like a girl that had just grown into her curves. 

“...but it looks like you’re just thirsty,” Randi concluded, catching me ogling Josie’s ass, our eyes now meeting in the mirror. 

I turned away as she - mocking me already with her smile - continued to primp aside Josie. 

Not knowing what to say, I looked to Lakshmi behind me, who was once again innocently gazing about the one-room apartment, such as it was. “D-don’t you girls normally do happy hour on Tuesday nights?” I awkwardly asked, steering conversation as far as I could away from myself and my...home situation.

“We do,” Randi answered, taking my attention again as we both now watched Josie struggling to straighten her too-short skirt, pulling down on its hem, “but Missy’s... going through some things. So we’re just going dancing, meeting the other girls out.”

“And, we wanted to cook for you,” Josie added, finally turning back towards me, smoothing her dress with both hands running down her youthful curves. 

“I made empanadas..!” Lakshmi chirped, causing me to turn again. The bright white teeth of her smile gleamed proudly from the rich brown of her complexion as she held her plate up, an offering. “Are you hungry now, Dr. J?” she asked, eyes wide, “We can make you a plate?”

Thinking back for the moment on the takeout styrofoam meatloaf I’d had, I answered. “n-no, I just ate,” I said, flinching as a hand was suddenly on my shoulder.

“Well, why don’t you sit down, then…” Randi purred, urging me backwards the couple steps it would take to get me back to the couch, “...the girls will put the food away.”

“My mom made this lasagna,” Josie said, “it’s really good.”

Before I knew it, I was slumped back on my couch, watching as Josie and Lakshmi had taken their trays and moved to the kitchenette in the corner, trying to find room in the half-size fridge for the meals. Randi was seated close, perched on the coffee table facing me, our knees nearly touching. 

“Your place is really nice,” Lakshmi called, rearranging the few things I had on the shelves of the fridge, making room, “I like it.”

“Th-thanks,” I offered, painfully aware of the pity in her voice, and the pitiful state I’d found myself in. It was humiliating! Here I was, their employer, a man nearly twice their age living like a shamefaced dog in his abject little den. I knew I needed to stand up for myself, exert some confidence and authority to these girls and put on a brave face, but I was still emotionally reeling from the events of these last 48 hours. How did they find out, and how much did they know, about what had happened at home?

“It’s kinda small, this place,” Josie said, finally closing the door of the refrigerator, both girls turning back towards us, “it’s your wife’s, right?”

There you go. 

“y-yeah…” I answered, hating how small my voice sounded, feeling Randi’s gaze boring into my skin as the other girls began to make their way back towards us, “sh-she bought it as an investment, y-years ago. Sh-”

“She owns the whole building, doesn’t she?” Randi asked, her tone making my skin crawl, “The offices, the parking lot, the property? And you just rent from her?”

“Well, y-yeah, sorta…” I answered, looking up now at Josie and Lakshmi, who were stepping in to stand on either side of where Randi sat, “she doesn’t really charge me...rent…”

No, I found myself thinking, she takes it from me in different ways.

“At least she made it nice for you,” Lakshmi offered warmly, gazing down at me in commiseration, “I like the furniture.”

“yeah…” I replied, looking around. The mismatched furniture, here in this apartment, was probably an afterthought of Sheryl’s, some of it likely leftover from a corporate redeco she’d overseen, some of it cheap stuff she’d had delivered wholesale. The bed was flimsy, the tiny dining table plain. The whole place was austere, to put it gently. It felt lonely, spartan...just enough to get by. This couch, though, was beginning to feel crowded. “Listen,” I began, appealing to the girls as all three now stared down at me where I sat, “how did you find ou-“

“Don’t you have any money of your own?” Josie asked, cutting me off. I noticed how, with the goose lamp aside the couch, curvy silhouettes of the standing girls were cast onto the wall, across the panel of the electric box unceremoniously situated aside the doorframe. 

“W-well, Josie, it's complicated…” 

“Complicated? How is it complicated?” Randi asked, obviously baiting me, trying to get me upset, off base, “She owns everything, you don’t. Without her you’d be homeless. It must be humiliating, being that dependent on your wife…”

“Yeah,” Josie said, biting her bottom lip in thought, all three girls regarding me with a maddening sense of pity, “Were you scared, when she kicked you out?”

“S-scared? No, I just, uh-“

“I dunno...it might be nice to be on your own for awhile,” Lakshmi added, brightly earnest, “have some space, have some freedom.”

“But you’re going to have to cook, clean...all the things she used to do for you…” Josie said, turning herself and tucking her skirt to sit, next to me on my right, on the couch. She crossed her gorgeous, bare legs, right over left, towards me. I couldn’t help but notice the muscularity of her calves, her pretty knees and thin ankles. ”We can all chip in, help out,” she offered, “Can’t we, Lakshmi?”

“Oh, for sure, yes,” Lakshmi replied, excitement in her voice as she now sat her voluptuous butt to my left, “We can help take care of you, we’re good at that.”

“Yes you poor thing…” Josie cooed, cocking her head on her long, thin neck, tucking a lock of smooth, medium-brown hair behind her left ear. She and Lakshmi both sat taller than me.

“...we’re good at a lot of things,” Randi purred as, smoothly, she lifted herself off the coffee table and turned her own shapely rear towards me, to...oh god...sit in my lap. 

Surprised at the audacity of their friend, the other two girls giggled, as my eyes goggled. What am I letting happen here?? I can’t be...sitting...like this...alone in my apartment...with three young girls…one of them on my lap...the other two nestling in closer...

Perched coquettishly on my thighs, Randi tossed her thick, darkly wavy hair over her shoulder and looked down at me with smoky eyes. ”Now that Sheryl’s kicked you out, we’re all you’ve got, aren’t we?” she pouted, taking the moment to tuck a stray lock of my own hair behind my ear, “Dr. J’s girls…”

“You poor, poor thing…” Josie cooed, left hand going to my shoulder. 

“Yes poor Dr. J…” Lakshmi followed, her soft hip pressing into mine. 

They nestled in closer, the air now filled with their perfume, the smell of their shampoo and hairspray. “Good thing you’ve got us,” Randi said, smiling wickedly at my predicament, “and we’ve got you.”

“We’ve got you…” Josie cooed softly, following her friend. 

“...we’ve got you,” Lakshmi repeated, now a mantra. 

What the fuck is happening?? I thought to myself as I felt myself sinking deeper into this cheap couch and further under the spell of these three comely girls. I can’t...I can’t do this, I knew, if indeed they had plans for me tonight, plans beyond just dropping off some empanadas and lasagna. I knew that if I was going to get back into Sheryl’s good graces, save my marriage, this was not a way to start. 

Somehow, from some deep wellspring of strength, I was able to muster my resistance, even as I felt Josie’s firm breast press against my right arm, even as I watched Lakshmi’s young, brown thighs as she crossed them towards me, even as Randi’s hand slid down the back of my neck. “uhhh...ladies,” I managed, “It’s getting late, w-we all have to be in the office tomorrow.” Was I really going to be able to do this? “Thanks for, uh, dropping by, bringing the food,” I said, “but I think you should be going...”

“Awww…so soon?” Lakshmi purred. . 

”...but we just got here…” Josie followed, plumping her lower lip in a girlish pout. 

“w-we all have to be in the office tomorrow,” I repeated, this time not sounding even half as determined. 

Randi paused, letting me squirm, hearing my indecision and knowing how hard a battle I was fighting. ”Is that really what you want?” she finally asked, her dark eyes looking confidently into mine, nicely big breasts bulging above her top right at my eye level. 

I could barely say anything, but managed to pull out a semi-convincing reply. “uhhh...y-y-yes.”

Randi chuckled, and the air in the room changed as - surprisingly - Randi was telling the girls it was time to go, as they clucked in disappointment but backed away; as they stood, straightened their dresses, and started to step towards the door. I don’t know what to call the feeling I was dealing with, roiling around my chest. Disappointment? Regret? But it seemed, at least, like they were listening to me. 

Randi, though, was still on my lap. 

The girls were taking one last look at themselves in the mirror, Lakshmi running her hands through her thick black hair, and I began to move t-

“No. You stay right there,” Randi said commandingly, left hand suddenly onto my chest, pushing me back. My eyes went wide, and before I could mount a protest, she was telling the girls, “Meet me down in the car. I’ll just be a few minutes.”

“n-no, Randi, really,” I began, again moving t-

Her right hand fell to my left thigh, grabbing my cock, pressing it into my leg through my cotton shorts. Semi-hard already, my entire body shivered and all the strength to fight fell from my body, drained suddenly away. I fell back to a slump against the couch. 

“I’ll see you in a sec,” Randi told the girls, “Dr J. here just needs a chat.”

Lakshmi and Josie both glanced our way, both chirping something casually in assent. If they noticed that their friend more or less had their boss’ penis right in her hand, they gave no sign and each fluttered a goodbye wave as they left. 

The door closed behind them. 

”Randi I think you should leave,” I said, meeting her gaze with what was the last of my resolve - only to feel that die, withering away as she squeezed me through my shorts and...god help me...I moaned. 

She smiled as she saw my eyes flutter. “Oh, I’m not going anywhere...” she replied, her hand already starting a slow rhythm, my disobedient shaft responding, already growing, “I’m staying right here.”

“Y-you can’t…” oh god...oh god….

My vision’s swimming. 

“Randi, stop…” I moaned, knowing right away I had too much arousal in my voice, “you’ve got to l-leave…”

“Oh, but Dr J…” she purred smokily, shifting herself on my lap, getting comfortable, all the while still working me, “I don’t want to leave. Remember our night in the car..?”

Oh my god if I could take that back, that drunken night in her Dodge Neon. One of the best blowjobs of my life, but the collateral damage it had done... “Y-Yeah?”

“Does your wife know about it?” she asked, simply, setting her shoulders to draw my eye.

Oh crap. “N-n-no, uh...she d-doesn’t...” My mind was struggling more and more as blood left it, abandoning me to swell into the monstrous thing that grew uncomfortably down my left thigh, under her hand. 

“Want to keep it that way?” she asked, as she saw my distress and moved me, took the effort to start to rearrange me in my shorts, pulling it up, pushing it up to my hip. 

Despite the stars that danced in front of my eyes, the pleasure that was clenching my gut into a fist, I managed to speak. “R-Randi, are you...blackmailing me?”

That made her laugh, a gravelly chortle. “Blackmail? Omigod is that what you think I’m doing?” She squeezed me again, just to see me shudder. She pushed my now rock hard dick hard into my hip, making me spasm. Then she started stroking it again, through my pajama shorts. “God, I have such power over you, don’t I…?”

At that I groaned, despite myself, certainly doing nothing to refute her.

“You love that idea, don’t you?” she mused, “You love women with power. You love that I fucking own you...just like Sheryl. I fucking own you…” With that, her hand left me, she sat up straighter - just to watch me slump, surrendering in acceptance that I was basically powerless here. My cock crawled against my flesh, sliding needy and abandoned, shifting towards me, across my hip and skin, centering itself.

“You’re owned by women and you love it,” she pushed, watching how her words just excited me more, watching now as the great mass of my unmanageable manhood tented my shorts, my taut waistband pulled away from my lower belly by its brute size, “you submissive little man…”

I was defeated, she knew it, and she could do anything she wanted with me. Defeated, and my cock was here to prove it. She watched, wide-eyed - we both did - as it slowly pushed itself up past my waistband, the head sliding just proud of the elastic, then emerging further. 

Her eyes flashed. “Oh, there we are…” she chuckled, looking down at it, “there’s my friend…” 

As if feeding on the attention, needful of more, my dick continued to grow, pushing further and further up past the waistband of my shorts, which began to slide down my shaft. The cooler air of the apartment swirled around me, onto my skin, exciting me even more.

“God fucking almighty it’s huge,” Randi marveled, as she sat back a bit to allow it space, sliding off my lap now and down onto her knees, onto the floor, still watching it. 

“R-Randi...no…”

”Speaking of us doing everything your wife used to do for you…” she hummed, ignoring me and gingerly grabbing the sides of my shorts. She pulled them down, freeing my huge stiffness completely. ”Oh god is this even bigger than before?” she marveled, smiling wickedly and readying herself, as she moved my shorts under me, pulled them down my thighs, to my knees, “Or are you just skinnier?” Her eyes were plastered, now, on the dancing, waving, wobbling thing that hovered there, as if self-willed, over my hips and belly.

My lord it did seem bigger than ever, thick veins throbbing under taut purple skin, head swollen and spongy. The thing was monstrous. 

“P-please, Randi...you don’t have t-to-”

“It’s okay...my jaw is nice and loose these days,” she said, as she settled herself more solidly on her knees, pulling my shorts all the way down so she could sneak between my thighs and - in a lurid display, opened her mouth and jaw wide...uncannily wide...for my benefit.

What the fuck?? I’ve never seen a human do that, I thought, as I saw her tongue, her teeth, the glistening pink halfway down her throat. 

Chuckling at my bewildered shock, Randi just closed her insanely big mouth and continued blithely on. “Is this going to be your first blowjob in your new apartment?” she asked, as she casually took hold of my bullish member with one soft, feminine hand, “or did anyone else sneak up here earlier?”

My vision swam again with pleasure. ”Wh-what..? What do y-y-you mean..?“

“Oh, sweetie, all the girls like you, y’know,” she began, as she idly began to stroke my shaft with her right hand, “Brittni and Bobbi, Josie...they think you’re adorable. Lakshmi was, like, all giddy on her way up the stairs here. Aubrey’s basically in love with you. Even poor chubby CiCi. They alllll want to get into your pants.”

Ugh, what? Nnh...Oh my god, no...this was too confusing, the thought of that swarm, buzzing about me, and I was oblivious. Was I surrounded, and didn’t even know it?

“And now that your wife’s kicked you out, now that you’re out on your own,” she continued, her left hand reaching under me to cup my hugely turgid sac, “now we have you all to ourselves.”

“nnnngh…” was all I could manage, as her fingers began to have their way, playing in gentle massage with my outsized testicles. 

“We can do everything she used to do for you,” she said, gravel in her voice keeping it from being a whisper, “we can tend to you, now that your wife’s not around. Would you like that?” Her soft left hand palmed me, squeezed me from below as her right urged me harder and harder and harder. She was stroking me, getting me ready. “Did she used to do this for you? Help you relax, after a long day..?”

“N-n-n-nnnngh….nnn-nnn...” I groaned, worried suddenly that soon I might come, just like this.

“No? Not really…?” she asked, wide eyed and falsely earnest, “Well then..life is better already, isn’t it?”

She leaned over, and spit onto its head, a big frothy glob that clung and began to dribble. 

We both watched as her hands played with me, spreading her saliva down, somehow controlling the beast that rose from me with her thin, delicate grip. It really was a sight, her manicured fingers in a tender fist, sliding up and down the column of my beefy hardness. As if on instinct, though, after a time, my gaze drifted behind it, to the swells of her breasts bulging from the neckline of her dress, watching them move, jiggle, fill with her breath. Images of them growing, of them becoming...oh god...hers...coalesced, and suddenly it was like the scent of Melissa’s perfume was wisping around me. I took a deep breath, any resistance I had buried and forgotten, stared at Randi’s tits, and thought back to the post Melissa had put up earlier, the invitation…

After several moments of allowing my reverie, Randi spoke again. “I know you’re thinking about her, Missy, wishing this was her,” she said. 

“n-no…” I lied.

“Haha liar,” she said, “I know you more than you think I do. You wouldn’t have lasted five seconds here with her…”

fuck…

“So I'd watch out,” Randi said, all the while still casually stroking me, “before, Melissa didn’t want to be a homewrecker...” 

I gasped as she slid two fingers further under me, exploring. 

“No, Missy didn’t like the idea of getting between two people in a marriage. Me? I never cared...I’m a fucking wrecking ball,” she continued, as I tried to keep from squirming as her fingers crept closer, “Missy, though, had her stupid standards. Now, though, now…”

She squeezed my sac, tickled my nethers. Bit her lower lip and leaned in closer. 

“Now everyone wants a piece of you.” She looked at my huge cock, brutally hard in her hand, and then up at me. I saw muscles in her throat working, her jaw flexing as she prepared herself for me and leaned in closer still. Still keeping eye contact, she rubbed her smooth cheek against my tightly stiff shaft, and told me right before she swallowed me: “But right now, tonight...this part is mine...”

==================================

[cryingcow]

Character Story - Tanimura [RGGO]

. . . Yeah, I gave up on Ryuji’s. Sorry, it was frustrating  >_<. Instead, it’s time for the Mr. Gambling Turtle!

I find it funny that Tanimura’s dad/s go to all the trouble of naming him “Masayoshi” for justice and whatnot, only for no one to ever use his first name XD But “Ma-chan” is cute tho! Also, never figured Tanimura as a detective could be so idealistic, especially when compared to someone like Yagami ┐(￣～￣)┌ .

Story: Tanimura and Date work together to solve a robbery. Tanimura learns like 3 moral lessons from his senior at the end of it, and proceeds to completely misinterpret said lessons.

Date: “Little Asia. My god, just look at this place.”

Tanimura: “Okay can you stop dissing my home now and get back to the case?”

Note: “Continental descent” just means “Chinese”. I wanted to put “mainlander” because that’s the accurate term, buuut idk if it would be more or less confusing like that esp with Westerners. (Also, the way we use “mainlander” in our country is Not Very Nice. Not sure if the connotation is the same in Japan.)

.

CHAPTER 1

.

|2010. Tanimura Masayoshi, along with Kiryu and others, uncovered and resolved a big conspiracy involving the Metropolitan Police Department. After resolving the incident, Tanimura was transferred from Community Safety Division to Criminal Investigation Division One. Life goes back to normal.|

[Mahjong Parlor]

Youth: “Damn it! Ma-chan’s probably going to win again!”

Tanimura: “Heh. I’m on a roll lately.”

Friendly Youth: “Hey, Ma-chan. Is it okay for you to be here? Didn’t you move from Community Safety to Criminal Investigation Division 1?”

Tanimura: “Well, I’m a detective who deals in murder now. They gave my achievements from the recent incident a high evaluation.”

Friendly Youth: “In that case, isn’t this bad? Then your boss will come here to yell at you . . .”

Tanimura: “Oh, you mean Date-san? Yeah, that would certainly be dangerous. I should get back to the station before he finds out.”

Friendly Youth: “One of these days, you’re going to get yourself fired . . .”

----

[Little Asia]

Mister: “Yo, Ma-chan. Playing hooky as usual.”

Tanimura: “I’m at work. Patrolling. I’m here to protect the safety of this area.”

Child: “Ma-chan, let’s play!”

Tanimura: “Sorry, I’m at work. Later~.”

Tanimura: (Well, if I play hooky too much, Date-san will find out. I should get back to the station fast.)

Tanimura: “Hm?”

Lowly Gangster: “It’s not a bad idea. And more than that, I don’t think we can wait any longer!”

Weak Middle-aged Man: “H-Hii! It-It hurts! Please stop hitting me!”

Tanimura: (That’s . . . the manager of Smile Heights Ni Hao, Hao-san . . .)

Tanimura: “Oi! What are you guys doing?!”

Lowly Gangster: “Ah?!”

Hao: “Ma-chan!”

Lowly Gangster: “Don’t butt in!! I’m working! I’m collecting this guy’s debt!”

Tanimura: “You’re a debt collector? Hao-san, how much did you borrow?”

Hao: “500,000 . . . I should have won the horse race . . . I lost a lot of money. Haha . . .”

Lowly Gangster: “The interest has ballooned to 5 million! Pay up 100,000 for this month!”

Tanimura: “Hey, stop! 500,000 to 5 million, that’s obviously an illegal interest rate!”

Lowly Gangster: “Bastard, didn’t I tell you earlier not to butt in? What are you, a cop?”

Tanimura: “. . . Tanimura of the Kamurocho Police. You do know if you keep doing that, you’ll be guilty of assault, right?”

Lowly Gangster: “What? There’s 3 of us here. Bastard, don’t think you can do anything on your own!”

Tanimura: “Well, that’s why I called backup.”

Police Officer: “Sir! I received your request for backup!”

{The policeman takes the yakuza away.}

Hao: “Tanimura-san, thank you!”

Tanimura: “Hao-san, if you can’t stop yourself from gambling, why did you have to borrow from that guy?”

Hao: “Because I thought I could win . . .”

Tanimura: “Aren’t you teaching children? A teacher shouldn’t be showing that kind of example.”

Hao: “Ah . . . you’re right. I should set a good example as a teacher.”

Tanimura: “You’re a good person, Hao-san. Isn’t it a shame you lost sight of that because of debt? I asked Mei-Fa recently, and I heard you were picking up orphans and putting them up in your apartment?”

Hao: “Yup. It wouldn’t be fair to push the children all on Omomuki-san, and I like kids anyway.”

Tanimura: “That’s good. That’s why you shouldn’t lose yourself in debt.”

Little Boy: “Ah, there you are Hao-sensei! It’s time for cram school!”

Hao: “Ah! Is it already time?”

Tanimura: “Oh, Hao-san, wait a moment. Here, take this.”

Hao: “Eh?! Money? Are you sure?”

Tanimura: “Yeah. This is the money I won from gambling. Use it to buy the children clothes and teaching materials.”

Hao: “Th-Thank you!”

Little Boy: “Hao-sensei! Let’s go! Everyone is waiting!”

Hao: “Tanimura-san! Again, thank you very much!”

Tanimura: “Go already. And don’t use it for gambling!”

{Hao leaves with the little boy.}

Tanimura: “Teaching children for free, and feeding them on top of that . . . He’s a good person. If only he didn’t have debt and a gambling habit . . .”

Date: “Are you talking about someone else? Because I know a detective who plays mahjong.”

Tanimura: “. . . guh. Date-san . . .”

Date: “I finally found you! Your paperwork isn’t finished yet, you truant demon!”

Tanimura: “Th-This time is different! I wasn’t playing hooky! In fact, I was helping people with their troubles . . .”

Date: “That’s no excuse! If a subordinate of Sudo is skipping out on work, it’s up to me to drag him back. Now, let’s go!”

Tanimura: “I understand . . .”

----

|Several days later . . .|

[Mahjong Parlor]

Tanimura: “Hehe. Oh, this tile . . . I’m on a roll today~.”

Friendly Youth: “Ma-chan, you’re skipping work again to play mahjong. You’re going to get disciplined again.”

Tanimura: “I just can’t stop. Anyway, it’s noisy outside. Is something going on?”

Friendly Youth: “I don’t know. Why are you asking me, you’re the detective. Haven’t you heard anything on your comm device?”

Tanimura: “Hm, I wonder. I was focused on something else today. Oh, this tile . . .”

Date: “Tanimura!! I knew you’d be here . . .”

Tanimura: “D-Date-san? Uh, you see . . . I wasn’t skipping . . .”

Date: “There’s been an incident.”

Tanimura: “Eh? Incident?”

Date: “A bank robbery. Happened just a while ago.”

Sudo: “A man wearing a full-faced helmet broke into the bank, stole 5 million in cash, and escaped on a scooter. It seems that he fled to Little Asia.”

Tanimura: “In Little Asia?”

Date: “You’re very familiar with Little Asia, correct? So you’ll be on this case.”

Tanimura: “. . . Understood. What did the guy look like?”

Date: “There was one perpetrator, a 170cm tall medium-sized man of continental descent.”

Tanimura: “Continental descent . . .”

Date: “There’s only one way in to enter Little Asia. All the other exits have been secured.”

Tanimura: “Wait, are you suspecting someone who lives in Little Asia?”

Date: “Given the situation, I have to be suspicious.”

Tanimura: “Is . . . that so . . .”

Date: “Why are you upset? People who are born and raised in this city can be suspects.”

Tanimura: “It’s just . . . I know everyone in Little Asia, but I don’t know anyone who’d be a thief . . .”

Date: “Hey, Tanimura . . . you know you should look at the facts and not get distracted by personal feelings, right?”

Tanimura: “Alright . . .”

.

-END-

.

CHAPTER 2

.

[Little Asia]

Date: “Little Asia. Narrow streets tangling with one another . . . Foreign signboards in a narrow space lined up in front of suspicious stores . . . It’s the perfect place to hide.”

Tanimura: “Haa. Yeah, maybe you’re right . . .”

Date: “Alright. Tanimura, now listen up.”

Tanimura: “I don’t feel like I’m suitable for this . . .”

 {Date and Tanimura presumably discuss their gameplan and go find residents to interrogate.}

Youth: “A man wearing a full-faced helmet?”

Tanimura: “Yeah, and he escaped into Little Asia on a scooter. Did you see him?”

Youth: “. . . You know, I think I did. He went inside a tobacco shop.”

Tanimura: “A tobacco shop, thank you!”

Youth: “Tanimura-san, are you suspecting one of us?”

Tanimura: “No, no. That’s not the case . . .”

Youth: “Is that true? Ren-san of the tobacco shop said he was also interrogated . . . You and that tough-looking detective are going around checking everyone’s alibi.”

Tanimura: “Tough-looking detectives . . .”

Date: “. . .”

Youth: “We may be poor, but when we’re in trouble, we help each other out. We’re not robbers.”

Tanimura: “I-I know. I don’t suspect everyone here. Thank you for giving us information. {to Date} It seems the guy went this way.”

Date: “Even so, this is a complicated place. If you weren’t with me, I’d have gotten lost.”

Tanimura: “Well, at first glance it’s just a dilapidated town.”

Date: “If the suspect is someone who doesn’t know the land, he’ll get lost. But if he does know the area, it’ll be easy to lose the police.”

Tanimura: “Um. Do you still suspect someone in Little Asia?”

Date: “I don’t want to doubt them, but as always we should.”

Tanimura: “‘Prejudice in the investigation is strictly prohibited’.  . . . I understand.”

Chinpira: “Oi!”

Chinpira: “You’re the ones who’ve been swaggering around Little Asia, aren’t you?”

Date: “Hm? Who are you guys?”

Tanimura: “Do you even live here?”

Chinpira: “Dunno. But you’re really annoying. Get out of here now.”

Tanimura: “Are you headaches working for the criminal we’re investigating? Getting in our way like this, maybe . . . you’re the robbers?”

Chinpira: “What did you say?”

Tanimura: “You see, Date-san? The culprit is an outsider all along.”

Date: “. . . Tanimura. That doesn’t seem to be the case right now.”

Chinpira: “If you don’t get out now, I’ll kick you out myself!”

{Tanimura and Date defeat the guys.}

Chinpira: “U-ugh . . .”

Tanimura: “Oi! Are you the robbers?!”

Chinpira: “What the hell are you talking about?! We were just ordered to get in your way!”

Tanimura: “Ordered? By who?”

Chinpira: “I-I don’t know. A bunch of unknown men. Probably yakuza, based from how they dressed . . .”

Tanimura: “Is that true?”

Chinpira: “It’s true! If we disturb your investigation, we’ll be paid . . . is what they said.”

Date: “You guys . . . where were you and what were you doing at around 5:30PM today?”

Chinpira: “We were playing at the arcade at that time.”

Date: “And you’re not lying?”

Chinpira: “I-I’m not lying! We even took pictures at the arcade . . .”

Date: “The crime took place at around 5:30PM. If you have an alibi, it should be the timestamps on those arcade pictures.”

Tanimura: “If that’s the case, do you think the yakuza who ordered them are the real robbers?”

Date: “It’s suspicious, sure, but its relevance to the robbery is still unknown.”

Tanimura: “Is that so . . . so what do we do with these guys?”

Date: “They obstructed a police investigation. Call for backup and let them handle it. We can go back to our investigation as soon as they take over.”

Tanimura: “Got it.”

----

Tanimura: “According to the testimony, the criminal escaped around here . . .”

Date: “It’s a straight road. What do you think lies ahead?”

Tanimura: “It’s a dead end. But . . .”

Date: “But?”

Tanimura: “There’s an apartment here. A place managed by a person named Hao . . .”

Date: “Hao?”

Tanimura: “Yeah. He’s a good person who takes orphans in and teaches them for free.”

Date: “Oh. That may be your impression of him, but it’s possible the criminal escaped into his apartment.”

----

Tanimura: “! That thing lying in front of the apartment . . . is that a scooter?”

Date: “That’s what the criminal was using, and it’s even the same color.  . . . hm? The license plate has been peeled off.”

Tanimura: “Is it the getaway vehicle?”

Date: “Seems like it. The engine is still warm. Thinking that he got away with it, the criminal made a mistake.”

Tanimura: “Following the footprints leading away from the scooter . . . it looks like the criminal escaped into the apartment.”

Hao: “Oh. Tanimura-san?”

Tanimura: “Hao-san? Are you in there?”

Hao: “. . . Yup. I was in the caretaker’s room. Tanimura-san, is this an investigation?”

Tanimura: “Yeah. In fact, I’m chasing down a robber. A man wearing a full-faced helmet escaped down here.”

Hao: “Eh!”

Date: “This hut in front of the apartment that looks like a lottery counter. Is this the caretaker’s room?”

Tanimura: “Yeah. Children live here, so he keeps an eye out for suspicious people from over there.”

Date: “So in other words, the criminal wouldn’t have been able to get pass without the caretaker seeing them.”

Hao: “. . .”

Date: “Hao-san. How about it? Looking at the situation, it is likely that the culprit disposed of the scooter here and fled into the apartment. Did you not see the criminal run by? If you really were in the caretaker’s room, you should have seen him.”

Hao: “. . . th-that is . . .”

Date: “. . . Did you see him?”

Hao: “I-I didn’t see anyone! No one passed by here!”

Date: “And there’s no mistake?”

Hao: “There’s no doubt! No one escaped to this apartment!”

Date: “Is that so . . .”

Hao: “. . . um. Can I go now?”

Date: “Yeah. Understood. Thank you for your time.”

{Hao goes back inside.}

Tanimura: “Hao-san didn’t see the criminal running away. So where could the culprit be?”

Date: “Something stinks.”

Tanimura: “Eh?”

Date: “It seems like the caretaker is hiding something.”

Tanimura: “Just because he doesn’t want to talk to the police all of a sudden? Maybe he’s busy.”

Date: “Maybe so. But . . . can’t you think of another reason? Like the caretaker protecting the fleeing criminal.”

Tanimura: “Date-san. Hao-san is a good person who takes care of orphans for free, isn’t he? He can’t be covering up for a robber.”

Date: “What if Hao-san knows the criminal? Wouldn’t that be reason enough to protect him?”

Tanimura: “Th-That’s . . .”

Date: “Hey, Tanimura. Don’t let your personal feelings get in the way of the investigation. You shouldn’t dismiss the possibility.”

Tanimura: “I know . . .”

Date: “Alright. Then let’s keep an eye on the apartment from the opposite building. If there is a criminal in there, he’s sure to come out eventually.”

Tanimura: (Hao-san protecting the criminal? That’s stupid . . .)

.

-END-

.

CHAPTER 3

.

|About an hour after Tanimura and Date started watching Hao’s apartment . . .|

[Little Asia]

Date: “There’s no movement. The caretaker still continues to watch TV in his room. The probable criminal hasn’t come out.”

Tanimura: “Yeah, he’s done nothing but watch TV the entire time. But, there is something strange about him . . .”

Date: “Strange how?”

Tanimura: “Hao-san has been fidgeting the entire time. Like he’s wary of something.”

Date: “You think he’s aware he’s under surveillance?”

Tanimura: “I wonder. But there’s something even stranger . . .”

Date: “What?”

Tanimura: “I told you that Hao-san tutors children, right? He should be teaching at this time. The study room is on the second floor . . .”

Date: “And yet he’s been in the caretaker’s room the entire time.”

Tanimura: “Yes. It’s supposed to be his daily routine . . . On top of that, I haven’t seen any of the children. The lights aren’t even on, and normally they should be switched on at the second floor . . .”

Date: “Tanimura . . . do you think your observations are related to the robbery case?”

Tanimura: “. . . I . . . think so . . . If we believe that a robber is in the apartment . . . it makes sense why the cram school isn’t open. The criminal could be using the children as hostages. That might be why Hao-san is protecting him. But . . . if that’s the case, it’s puzzling why the room isn’t lit. There’s no reason to turn the lights off and tell everyone otherwise.”

Date: “Heh. Tanimura, it seems you finally understand how to observe without letting your personal feelings interfere.”

Tanimura: “I’m not . . . I’m still not doubting Hao-san.”

Date: “. . . Alright. Let’s end this stakeout.”

Tanimura: “What are we going to do?”

Date: “You said things felt strange. It’s time to confront the caretaker. Doing so may move this situation from its standstill.”

Tanimura: “. . . Understood.”

Tanimura: “Hao-san. I’d like to ask you a few questions.”

Hao: “T-Tanimura-san? What’s wrong?”

Tanimura: “Where are the kids?”

Hao: “! W-We-Well, that is . . .”

Tanimura: “It’s time for cram school, right? But the lights on the second floor are still off. Hao-san, what on earth is going on? Where are the children?”

Hao: “. . . uh . . .”

Tanimura: “I’m going to look inside the apartment room. Is that okay?”

Hao: “. . . Tanimura-san! I’m sorry!”

{Hao grabs a bag and pushes past Tanimura.}

Tanimura: “Ah! Hao-san, where are you going with that bag?! . . . ! The scooter?”

Date: “Tanimura! He got away! Let’s go chase him!”

Tanimura: “O-Okay!”

Tanimura: (Hao-san, is this a joke? There’s no way you . . .)

----

Date: “Haa . . . haa . . . damn it! The alleys are too complex and our target is on a scooter! Haa . . . haa . . . this is . . . we have to keep going!”

Tanimura: “Date-san! Here! Please follow me!”

Date: “H-Hey, that’s the opposite direction . . .”

Tanimura: “This is a shortcut!”

Tanimura: “Haa . . . haa. There you are, Hao-san.”

Date: “Haa . . . haa. Tanimura, you were right.”

Tanimura: “Haa . . . haa . . . Hao-san got off the scooter and entered that building!”

Date: “Alright! Let’s catch him!”

 ----

Tanimura: “Hao-san!! Haa . . . haa . . . haa . . .”

Hao: “T-Tanimura-san?”

Tanimura: “What’s in that bag? Is it money?! Are you the robber?!”

Hao: “Th-That’s . . .”

Tanimura: “Show me what’s inside!”

{Tanimura grabs the bag and forces it open.}

Hao: “Ah.”

Tanimura: “Th-this is . . .”

Date: “The 5 million that was stolen. Judging from the number of wads, I’d that’s probably it.”

Hao: “. . .”

Tanimura: “Hao-san! What is the meaning of this?! Why did you become a robber . . .”

Hao: “. . . i-it couldn’t be helped.”

Tanimura: “What can’t?”

Hao: “The yakuza were claiming my debt! They took the children!”

Tanimura: “What did you say?”

Hao: “They . . . if you’re an orphan in Little Asia, it’s hard to go to the police . . . If I didn’t pay off my debt, they’d kidnap the children and sell them off . . .”

Tanimura: “I see. Since the parents of those children were here illegally, then those kids don’t exist at all in this country.”

Date: “in other words, there is no one who’ll sue them. They’re free to do human trafficking.”

Tanimura: “Hao-san, is that why you did the robbery?”

Hao: “They ordered me to. If I steal the money, they’ll return the children.”

Tanimura: “Is that so . . .”

Yakuza: “There it is! That money is ours.”

Tanimura: “! Who are you guys?”

Yakuza: “It can’t be helped now that he’s talked. I’m taking all that money. Hand it over in exchange for the children’s lives, or we’ll sell them to get the money.”

Tanimura: “I won’t let you do that. I’m not paying, now hand over those kids.”

Yakuza: “Kekeke. There’s only two of you against us. You’re going to die right now!”

{Tanimura and Date defeat the yakuza.}

Tanimura: “Where are the children?! Answer me!!”

Yakuza: “S-Second floor of the opposite building . . . they’re tied up there . . .”

Date: “Tanimura, watch these guys and Hao-san. I’ll call for back up and pick up the kids.”

Tanimura: “Got it. Hao-san, are you okay?”

Hao: “Yup. Tanimura-san, I’m sorry . . .”

Tanimura: “Hao-san, if you’re ever in trouble, please don’t hesitate to contact me. We’re friends, aren’t we?”

Hao: “Tanimura-san . . .”

 ----

Date: “Tanimura. The children are safe and protected now.”

Tanimura: “Um. Does the police know about the children’s complicated situations . . .”

Date: “Yeah. I sat that out. It would be confusing when it comes to the police.”

Tanimura: “Thank you very much.”

Date: “About Hao-san . . . as expected, there’s no easy way to handle his case. Even though he was threatened, it was still a robbery. They might give him a lighter sentence.”

Tanimura: “The situation is what it is. I hope they do . . .”

Tanimura: “. . .”

Date: “What’s wrong? That’s not the face one wears when a case is resolved.”

Tanimura: “. . . This case went exactly as you said. I was too caught up in my personal feelings, and my eyes were clouded. I should have known from the testimony that Hao was suspicious, but I didn’t want to doubt him. I didn’t want to believe my friends from Little Asia could do that.  . . . No, I didn’t want you to think they’d do it. Letting such thoughts distract me from the facts . . . I should be kicked off the police force.”

Date: “. . . You’re right. It’s not a very flattering side of you. But Tanimura, I think there are two kinds of people in the police. The kind who upholds the law . . . while the other kind fights for their idea of justice. There are people like you who learn once they bounce back from their mistakes. Remember that.”

Tanimura: “. . . I will. Thank you very much, Date-san.”

Date: “Besides, solving this case would have been impossible if it wasn’t for your keen eye and familiarity with the streets of Little Asia. It seems your truancy turned out to be useful this time. Heh, if everyone was just like you, the world would be a better place.”

Tanimura: “Haha, I can’t say anything to that.”

 ----

|A few days later . . .|

[Mahjong Parlor]

Tanimura: “Alright! I win again this time~!”

Friendly Youth: “Wow! You beat me again!”

Tanimura: “Hehe. Looks like I’m in great form today as well.”

Friendly Youth: “But Ma-chan. Is it okay for you to be skipping out on work again? Your boss is going to get angry at you.”

Tanimura: “It’s alright, it’s alright. I had a chat with my boss. It turns out my truancy is useful.”

Friendly Youth: “Is that true . . . Oh, that’s right. It seems like Hao-san got off with a light sentence.”

Tanimura: “Yeah. They took into consideration the fact that he was threatened by the yakuza.”

Friendly Youth: “If Hao-san is gone, there’ll be no one to take care of the kids.”

Tanimura: “Yeah. I’m glad all the loose ends are tied up.”

Date: “What loose ends are tied up?”

Tanimura: “Guh. Date-san . . .”

Date: “Tch, you! Are you playing hooky again?!”

Tanimura: “N-No, because you gave me permission to skip, didn’t you? You said skipping was good!”

Date: “You idiot! I didn’t give you permission! And I’m not cleaning up your paperwork! Sudo told me off because of your truancy! Get back to work!”

Tanimura: “Y-Yes! I’m sorry!”

{Tanimura runs off.}

Date: “Good grief . . .  Heh. To be young with such energy.”

.

-END-

Masterlist

[its-nuwanda-baby]

its a bit of a odd pair but maybe some neil x knox?? hcs if you do them or a confession fic 👉👈

confession one shot, coming right up!

A Punch in the Right Direction (Knox x Neil)

Warnings: underaged drinking, language, slight mentions of blood, slight mentions of homophobia (only in the beginning!)

I PROMISE YOU IT’S WAYYY FLUFFIER THAN IT SOUNDS LOLL

when neil befriends a girl at rehearsals, he has no idea that she will single-handedly deliver him his doom... in the form of one, stupidly wasted knox overstreet. chaos ensues. also Todd and Stick are boyfriends because I can, and because that funky lil man will have a place in everything I write (I am but a stick stan account). ENJOY!!! let me know what you think!

Neil Perry had always known he was gay. He knew right when he kissed Charlie in the first grade, on a dare from Pitts, that this was what a crush was supposed to feel like. He accepted early on in life that the world was not kind to people like him. He understood that words like “queer,” “fairy,” and “homo” were names for people like him, and that the sneers of disgust that accompanied them were just part of a package deal. He knew when he started school at Welton Academy that there was the inevitable danger of crushing on roommates and friends, and by his senior year at the all boys school, he was used to the routine of identifying and burying unwanted feelings until they were forgotten. So, when Knox Overstreet had leaned against his doorframe on the first day of school, smirking like an idiot, Neil had no problem identifying the beginnings of a crush bubbling in his chest. He had no problem, when Knox had reached out to shake the hand of Neil’s new (incredibly shy) roommate, pushing down the goofy smile that had threatened to spread on his face at how sweet Knox was being. Neil Perry had a crush on Knox Overstreet, and, given his previous experiences, it was about as scary as a kitten.

He had no problem hiding his disappointment when Knox announced he wouldn’t be at study group that night, even trying to pull him out of his obvious state of disappointment- “anything’s better than Hell-ton hash, Knox…” he had said, with just the perfect amount of nonchalance to make it convincing. Oh well, he thought, at least it would be easier to focus on the trig homework he needed to finish. 

And, when Knox returned, looking like his head was stuck in the atmosphere of Jupiter, Neil had so convincingly feigned his excitement when Knox had announced his infatuation with Chris- “are you crazy? What’s wrong with that?”- when the only thought going through his head had been you idiot, she has a boyfriend. What about me? I’m right here? 

Neil Perry was, for the most part, a good actor. He could play the part of the excited friend, the matchmaker, the hopeless romantic, and he could play them with ease. It was Todd’s fault, really, that everything had begun to unravel. That the feelings became too much to bury. In Neil’s experience, once it was out in the open, there’s no going back. If only Todd wasn’t so damn observant.

The conversation had gone somewhat normal, in the beginning:

“I dunno, Todd… I guess I just don’t understand it! I mean, she has a boyfriend already! If Knox really loves her so much, why isn’t he happy for her?”

“Neil, no offense, but don’t you have more important things to worry about than Knox’s love life?”

“Like?”

“Like, just about everything else? Why is it so important to you, anyways?”

That had shut Neil up. Maybe he wasn’t too good at hiding his feelings, after all. Then, the dreaded question reared its ugly head.

“Do you… like Knox?”

He had never been good at this part, the part where he had to lie about his feelings. Usually, nobody could even tell something was off, and he never even had to think about what to say if someone guessed. Todd was just… different, somehow. Neil knew he was also queer. He had seen Todd holding hands with another boy from their hall, nicknamed Stick. They were a nice couple, and Neil had to bite back his jealousy at seeing what he only wished he could have with Knox. 

“Neil? You know you can tell me, right?”

“You know the answer to that question already.”

Todd gave a small nod and moved to sit next to Neil, putting an arm around his shoulders.

“You know, I may be the newest addition to this friend group, but I don’t think Chris is the one Knox really wants.”

And before Neil could process the implications of the statement, Stick was at their door, and Todd was waving goodbye to Neil and leaning to kiss his boyfriend hello, and then they were gone.

But, if not Chris, then who? The question haunted his mind for days, and by the end of October, Neil Perry’s crush had grown into quite a bit more, which meant that burying his feelings was about to get a hell of a lot more complicated. Thanks to rehearsals and a new friend, maybe even impossible.

Neil enjoyed rehearsals. He loved watching his fellow actors lose themselves in the performance. He loved listening to the chatter of the tech crew as they discussed backdrops and lighting. He loved the smell of sawdust and paint that lingered in the air and on his clothes. The one thing he never really got the hang of was the talking. Despite being known as a social butterfly at Welton, the mixture of Henley Hall girls and public school kids was a whole new atmosphere for him, and if there’s one thing Neil Perry hated, it was change. So, when the girl who played Hermia walked up and introduced herself, he was so overjoyed at the prospect of a friend that he hadn’t stopped to ponder over the familiarity of her surname. 

“Hey, you look a little lost! I’m Ginny, Ginny Danbury. I play Hermia.”

He had looked up, unsure at first of whether he was the one being addressed. In discovering that he was, his face broke out into the trademark Neil Perry Smile, the one he reserved for his dad and Dr. Nolan. 

“Neil. Perry. I, uh, I play Puck.”

They had shaken hands, he in his crown of twigs, and she in her pink tulle dress, and a friendship was born. 

Two weeks before the performance, she mentioned her older brother. 

“So, I got home last night, and Chet- that’s my brother, by the way- Chet asked me if I had been hooking up with someone. Apparently, he thinks the only valid reason to be out late is if you’re getting laid…”

She had kept talking after that, but Neil had stopped listening. What had Knox said about that girl? Practically engaged… to Chet Danbury. When rehearsal was over that night, Ginny asked Neil a question.

“Would you mind giving me your phone number?”

—

The smell of cheap liquor greeted Knox before he had even opened the door. Charlie’s words rang in his head; you don’t really think she means you’re going with her? He was right, after all… this was Chris’s boyfriend’s house, and he was a guest. His guest. He was really starting to regret passing up a Poets meeting for this, when he could have been cozied up next to Neil in the cave. Neil… with his perfect brown eyes that should be considered national treasures, in Knox’s opinion, and a voice like velvet… Neil, the reason he had even begun pursuing Chris in the first place, as a way to distract him from the true object of his affections. Neil, whose absent-minded, yearning looks were surely reserved for everyone, not just him… keep it together, Knox, tonight is the night you forget about Neil Perry, once and for all.

“Carpe diem, Knoxious… carpe diem.”

He opened the door.

About an hour later, he was wasted. His earlier attempt to get a beer had been sabotaged by two football players who were a little too closely acquainted with the bottles of vodka and whiskey lined up on the counter. Before he knew what was happening, his beer had been replaced by a shot of liquor that smelled exactly like the stuff his sisters used to clean off their nail polish, and he had been affectionately dubbed “Mutt Sanders’ brother” by the shorter of the two jocks, despite his protests of never having met a Mutt Sanders. A few shots later and he was stumbling into the basement, nearly incoherent. What happened after that would surely remain burned into his memory forever, but the most that he could bring himself to tell anyone was that he had somehow ended up on the floor with a bloody nose and a splitting headache.

The full story is a bit more complicated. Knox, intoxicated and feeling brave, had begun his search for Chris in the kitchen, weaving around crowds of people he didn’t know. If he had been sober, he certainly would have been a little less obvious, but Knox Overstreet was a man on a mission, and although the alcohol helped him focus on the task at hand (find Chris, woo Chris, (maybe) hook up with Chris, fall in love with Chris, forget Neil Perry), it certainly didn’t aid him in his attempts at subtlety. By the time he managed to get to the basement, he forgot why he was there.

Neil, Knox, you’re here to find- no, you’re here to FORGET Neil. Find Chris, forget Neil. Find Chris, forget Neil. It was here that Knox began to feel the fourth shot in his legs, and he quickly moved to sit on the couch before they gave out. Cursing his low alcohol tolerance, he began to scope out the crowd in the basement for Chris, when he suddenly became aware of two things at once: the presence of an annoyingly loud couple mid-makeout on his right, and the sleeping presence of Chris Noel on his left. And Knox Overstreet, in a burst of alcohol-infused idiocy, began to stroke her hair, and suddenly it wasn’t Chris on the couch beside him, but Neil. Neil Perry, and he was smiling up at Knox, saying something that Knox couldn’t understand because all he could see was the shape of Neil’s lips, moving ever so slowly towards his, and in that moment, as their lips met, time seemed to slow down, and the voices and music were all combining into a kind of ambient soundtrack- that is, until the distorted voice of Kitchen Jock #1 made its way into Knox’s alcohol-muddled brain, pulling him back to earth in word form.

Chet… CHET, it’s Mutt Sanders’ brother! And he’s feelin’ up YOUR GIRL!

And he wasn’t kissing Neil, he was kissing Chris, and she wasn’t asleep, she was sitting up, asking him what he was doing, and, hell, what was he doing? As he opened his mouth to answer her, he picked up a bright red blur in his peripheral vision, moving towards him.

Next thing he knew, he was on the floor.

—

There was a knock on the door.

“Mr. Perry. You have a phone call.”

“Yessir, I’ll be right there, sir.”

Todd shot him a confused look from where he was sat on the floor with Stick. He and Neil had left the Poets meeting about ten minutes after Charlie showed up with girls and liquor, and Meeks and Pitts had soon followed. The latter two had denied their invites to a study group, which meant they were most definitely making out in their room, so Todd had asked Neil about inviting Stick to work on the Latin conjugation assignment together, to which Neil had happily agreed.

In all honesty, Neil was glad for the phone call. Todd and Stick were so cute together it was nearly maddening, especially when Neil could so easily imagine him and Knox together in the same ways. The gentle brush of their shoulders against one another as Todd checked Stick’s spelling, the way Stick watched Todd’s lips moved as he practiced his pronunciations… to anyone else, it would have been endearing, but to Neil it felt like a lifetime prison sentence. 

Dr. Hager handed him the telephone when he got to the end of the hall, and he nodded a “thank you” before watching the man disappear into his room.

“Hello, this is Neil Perry?”

“Neil, thank goodness you’re there!”

“Ginny?”

“Yes, oh, I’m so sorry to bother you on a Friday night, but there’s been a bit of an… incident…”

Shit. Knox had been at the Danburys’ house. Neil’s blood turned to ice.

“What sort of incident? Is everyone alright?”

“Well, sort of… do you happen to know Knox Overstreet?”

Boy, did he ever…

So that’s how Neil ended up at the Danburys’ house at 10 pm on a Friday night, picking up a bleeding (and incredibly drunk) Knox. Ginny hadn’t been able to tell him what happened, and nobody else got a good look, but the story was that, while an intoxicated Knox had been trying to dance with Chris, Chet noticed and punched him in the nose. Neil believed it. 

So there they were, sitting on the dock near the lake as Neil pressed snow to the bruise that was rapidly forming around Knox’s eye. 

Around 11, Neil deemed Knox sober enough to take back to the dorms without causing suspicion, and they crept up the stairs and down the hall to Neil’s and Todd’s dorm.

Neil softly pushed the door open with his foot to see Todd at his desk, surrounded by crumpled pieces of paper. Upon seeing Knox’s inebriated state and the exhausted look on Neil’s face, he immediately jumped to help Knox out of his coat and tie while Neil guided him to sit on one of the beds.

“Neil! Buddy! How’d you get here?”

Neil and Todd immediately shushed Knox, whose bruised face contorted into a frown.

“Sorryyyy” was the slurred response, given in a sort of whisper-yell smoothie.

“Knoxy, don’t talk. Your nose is still bleeding.” Neil’s voice was dripping in concern, which caused one of Todd’s eyebrows to perk up in his tell-tale “I told you so” smirk. Knox was preoccupied with trying to lick the blood from his nose “to clean it!”, and Neil was trying to get him to sit still. 

After about an hour, Todd had gone to room with Hopkins for the night, to his immense gratitude (drunk Knox was not a character Hopkins was particularly interested in dealing with, and neither Todd nor Neil blamed him one bit). Knox, who had sobered up enough to gain the ability to form coherent sentences (but not a filter) was delighted to fill Neil in on the happenings of the party, to which Neil couldn’t bring an objection from his lips. As annoying as he could be, Neil loved Knox’s ramblings, sober or otherwise.

“And then, I was sitting on the couch and the strangest thing happened! Chris was there, but it wasn’t really Chris! It was you, Neil, can you believe it? You were there!”

Neil hummed in mock surprise, grabbing the cup of water he had gotten from the bathroom and wetting another towel.

“No, Neil, you gotta remember, you kissed me! Well, you almost did…”

Neil froze, almost dropping the water.

“I.. did what?”

“You kissed me, silly! And I thought I was drunk…”

“Knox, I wasn’t at the party… I didn’t kiss you.”

The crushed look on Knox’s face at Neil’s words would have been adorable if it hadn’t been so sad…

“You… didn’t kiss me?” Neil shook his head slowly. “But then, who did I kiss?”

“Knox, Chris’s boyfriend punched your lights out. You were seeing things.”

“But Neil, you don’t get it. That was supposed to be our kiss!”

“Shh, Knox, stop moving so much. Your nose isn’t bleeding anymore, so let’s get you to bed. Can you stand up?”

Knox pouted, pouted, which almost caused Neil to drop dead on the spot, and stood up shakily before giggling and leaning into the wall.

“Nope!” He sang, popping the “p.”

Neil sighed. Knox was wearing jeans and a dress shirt, which meant he was going to be incredibly uncomfortable. Might as well do it now, then at least he won’t remember if anything embarrassing happens…

“Knox, you’re going to be uncomfortable sleeping in that.”

“So strip me, Perry, I’m not afraid,” he said with a drunken attempt at a wink that should not have made Neil’s heart flutter in the way that it did. He sighed and moved to unbutton Knox’s shirt, breathing another sigh of relief when he was met with the sight of a cotton t-shirt underneath. Crisis number one, averted.

“If I hold onto your shoulders, can you get your own pants off?”

“Yyyyyyeup!” It took Knox three tries to find the button on his jeans, but eventually, his clothes were folded neatly on Neil’s desk and Knox was sitting on the bed in just a t-shirt and boxers.

“You know, Neil, it’s your fault I went to that stupid party anyways.”

“Pardon?”

“Your fault, Neil. You and your stupid hair and your stupid face… you’re so stupid and fucking hot and it drives me so insane. It’s your fault I tried so hard to get Chris, and… and it’s your fault that my fucking nose is broken. There, I said it.”

There had only ever been a handful of times where Neil Perry was rendered fully speechless. Usually, it happened when his father said something particularly nasty, or when Todd occasionally worked up the courage to read his original poems at DPS meetings. But nothing could have prepared him for what Knox Overstreet said to him at 11:30pm on that fateful Friday night as he knelt on the floor between his legs.

“Wh-what?”

“You’re so stupid, Neil… I can’t do this anymore.”

And before he could say anything, Knox pulled him in by his tie and captured Neil’s parted lips with alcohol drowned ones of his own.

Neil pushed him away with no hesitation. “Knox, I-“

“Neil, come on… first Chris, now you too?”

“Knox…”

“No, Neil. You always talk, now I’m talking. I’m in love with you, and I thought maybe you might have been in love with me after tonight, but I was wrong and I’m starting to think that maybe going after Chris was a good thing, because she made me forget about you, even if it was just a little bit for a little bit of time. I’m…” Knox went silent as Neil kissed him again, softly.

“Knox, I like you. I like you a lot, actually, but you’re still really drunk and we should wait to talk about this, yeah?”

He stroked Knox’s hair softly, smiling when the other boy nodded and leaned into his touch.

“Okay. I’m gonna get ready for bed now, alright? I’m not leaving, I promise.”

Knox hummed affirmatively, getting under the covers of Neil’s bed.

“Smells like you… smells nice.” He buried his face in Neil’s pillow.

Neil smiled as he turned off the lights and got into Todd’s bed, listening to Knox’s quiet snores until he fell asleep.

—

“Fuck”

Knox opened his eyes, and immediately regretted it when the world exploded, sending shards of light and color into his aching brain. Groaning, he buried his face in his (no, not his,  his was softer?) pillow, wincing at the unexpected throb around his eye. He rolled over, facing the ceiling, moving an arm up to cover his eye when he heard the door open and relaxing immensely when he heard Todd’s voice.

“Morning, Knoxious. You okay?” Todd’s concern was evident, which made Knox feel a lot better. He loved that about Todd, he made up for what he lacked in confidence with an abundance of love and care for other people. Here he was now, handing Knox a bad of ice and a plate of pancakes from the diner he loved in town.

“Stick and I got breakfast this morning, thought you could use a hangover cure. Oh, which reminds me, I also brought you this,” he said, handing Knox a cup of water and a bottle of aspirin. He took everything with a smile, which widened when he saw Todd return it. Todd never smiled, and when he did, it was almost always genuine, and it made Knox feel warm inside to know that he had caused it.

“Where’s- ahem- where’s Neil?” Knox cleared the sleep from his throat and gulped down a couple pills before digging into the pancakes- blueberry. My favorite! Todd knows my favorite!

“Oh, uh, I actually don’t know,” Todd shrugged, furrowing his eyebrows, “He might be down by the dock? He goes there to study sometimes when he’s conflicted.”

Knox nodded, drinking the rest of the water and making quick work of the remaining pancakes.

“I’m gonna go find him. We gotta talk. If you see him, let him know I’m looking for him, alright?”

Knox got out of bed, only slowing for a moment when he realized he wasn’t wearing pants, before grabbing his jeans from their place on Neil’s chair and tugging them on before leaving the room.

Knox Overstreet had shitty hangovers. He had the headaches, the nausea, the fatigue, the dehydration, you name it… but he couldn’t seem to get wasted enough to ever forget anything. Usually, that was a good thing. As Knox marched towards the dock, he couldn’t decide whether he was glad to have the memories of the previous night, or if he wished that they would disappear forever.

His eyes are so fucking pretty. Fuck, how could I ever think I was in love with Chris when he was right here in front of me? 

“Knox? You okay?”

“Mmm. You’re pretty, that’s all.”

He had laughed, then. God, his laugh was like music. His laugh was music.

“You’re pretty too, Knoxy.”

Fuck. It was too much, he was right here, and he had just taken Knox’s shirt off, and he was sitting on the floor between his legs, and it was all too much. 

Carpe fucking Diem.

“You’re so stupid, Neil… I can’t do this anymore.”

Knox was grateful for Neil’s tie in that moment, because it was the one thing tethering him to the mortal world. Neil’s lips felt like home, and he knew it was more than just a drunken kiss. He was made to be kissing Neil, and he felt like he could do it forever.

And then it had ended.

“Knox, I-“

“Fuck.” He cursed at himself, the memory hurting his head worse than the alcohol or the bruise. 

“I like you a lot, actually…”

“You’re pretty drunk still”

“Wait to talk about this, yeah?”

“Knox! Down here!”

Speak of the fucking devil. Neil Perry, looking as beautiful as ever, was sitting on the dock, long legs sprawled out, reading glasses balanced on the tip of his nose. He looked delicious. Knox shoved back those thoughts before they made themselves known on his physical form and waved at Neil, walking towards him.

“Hey, Neil.”

“I’m glad you’re up! How are you? How’s your head?”

“‘M fine, Neil. Really. Thanks to you and Todd.”

As he sat down next to Neil, he couldn’t tell if the look the other boy gave him was a look of concern or of longing.

“The bruise actually looks a lot better. I’ll bet it’s gone completely by Monday.”

Knox tried to hide the way his breath hitched as Neil’s hand moved to cup his cheek, stroking the area around his eye so tenderly it should have been illegal.

“Neil…”

“I know. We need to talk about last night.”

“I shouldn’t have…”

“Actually, I’m… I’m glad you did. Considering you meant it, at least.”

Knox was speechless. He had planned a whole speech out on his way down, only to have all words robbed from him by the flecks of sunlit gold in Neil’s brown eyes. 

I love you

“I did. Mean it, that is… I definitely meant it.”

Jesus Christ, I love you, Neil Perry

“Then you won’t mind if… if I did it again?”

Knox met Neil’s eyes with his own. 

“Not in the slightest.”

Then, he did the same with his lips.

And I love you, Knox Overstreet.

[chrisswearicho]

My AO3 account BTW guys and links to my stories! They're all Doctor Who fics.

1) My Past Come Home. My Future Lead The Way

Summary: “Right.” Rory finally seemed to react, shaking his head a little as his hands flailed for effect, “right sorry. So I’ve gone to sleep, got woken up by the TARDIS going crazy and now we’re in a future TARDIS with a future Doctor who’s also a woman? I’m getting this right?”

Characters:  13th Doctor, 11th Doctor, 12th Doctor, 10th Doctor, 9th Doctor, 8th Doctor, 7th Doctor, 6th Doctor, 5th Doctor, 4th Doctor, 3rd Doctor, 2nd Doctor, 1st Doctor, Yasmin Khan, Ryan Sinclair, Graham O'brien, Bill Potts, Nardole, River Song, Amy Pond, Rory Williams, Donna Noble, Rose Tyler, Jack Harkness, Lucie Miller, Ace, Peri Brown, Tegan Jovanka, Vislor Turlough, Sarah Jane Smith, Jo Grant, Jamie McCrimmin, Zoe Heriot, Ian Chesterton, Barbara Wright, Susan Foreman, The Master(Dhawan), The Master (Gomez) /Missy.

Chapters: 26/26

2) A Change of Mind

Summary: “What would your little friends think if they knew?”

“Who cares?” she scoffed with a roll of her eyes, “dropped them off at home. Good riddance as far as I’m concerned. This is between me and you. They were the Doctor’s ‘little friends’, not mine.”

“Who’re you then? If you’re not the Doctor.”

“Dunno yet,” she shrugged, seemingly pleased, however, that he was finally accepting that she wasn’t quite the Doctor, “I haven’t decided. You know,” she huffed out a heavy breath, “you’re wasting so much good running away time by asking all these questions. Maybe by the time I’ve caught you, you know, if you run away right now, I’ll have decided. Come on.”

><><><><

An alternate ending to my story 'My Past Come Home. My Future Lead The Way'. This will probably not make much sense if you haven't read that first if i'm honest. It's the alt ending where 13 becomes the Valeyard!

Characters: 13th Doctor(Valeyard), The Master(Dhawan), Yasmin Khan, Ryan Sinclair & Graham O’Brien.

Chapters: 2/2

3) Fear

Summary: “You think that I was some hard done by hero, like the Doctor?” the Not Doctor’s tone was taunting as she smirked at him, “You think they wiped my memory because of something they’d done?” she laughed suddenly, throwing her head back as though that was the most hilarious thing she’d ever heard. The Master’s hearts dropped to his stomach; he’d already put this much together but having it confirmed made him swallow nervously.

“So… why was your mind wiped?”

“Well, they couldn’t kill me. There’s no limit on my ability to regenerate. They couldn’t keep me trapped. No prison could hold me. But then they figured out a way to stop me. Ingenious actually, I will give them that. They simply caught me long enough to erase me, or they thought they had.”

Characters: 13th Doctor (Valeyard), the Master (Dhawan), Yasmin Khan, Ryan Sinclair, Graham O’Brien, River Song.

Sequel to A Change of Mind

4) Escape

Summary: “I know you said eyebrows Bill, but that’s just ridiculous!” The Doctor in the bowtie smirked as they all came to a stop across from one another, glancing from his future self to Bill who just rolled her eyes with a smile and a raised eyebrow.

“They were making up for lost time. Better to have too much than none at all.” The Eyebrows Doctor deadpanned and raised an impressive eyebrow of his own to his past self.

“Ugh!” the Doctor in the bowtie jerked back in clear offence, hand flying to his own eyebrows for a moment as his face scrunched up in annoyance to his future self, words stumbling around in his mouth as he tried to come up with a retort. “Shut up,”

Characters: 13th Doctor, 12th Doctor, 11th Doctor, 10th Doctor, Rose Tyler, Amy Pond, Rory Williams, Bill Potts, Yasmin Khan, Ryan Sinclair & Graham O'brien.

Chapters: 14/14

Part 1 of a series that will continued next week anyway 😂

5) Search

Summary: “Time Lord society was, as I was taught, created by three people. Rassilon, the great engineer, The Omega, the mind behind Gallifrey’s scientific advancements and-” she cut herself off suddenly, realisation dawning on her face and her entire body seemed to jolt with the force of the realisation that occurred to her, “Oh!”

“Doctor? What is-” Yaz started but she was quickly cut off by the Doctor who flapped her hands at her desperately.

“Yaz! I love you but shut up a minute. Let me think.” The human obediently fell quiet and they all watched as the Doctor began to pace suddenly, her eyes still wide before she dropped onto the steps leading further into the TARDIS, the realisation giving away to shock as she mumbled out her next words, “I’m the Other.”

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

SEQUEL TO ESCAPE.

Now armed with the information that she knew Rassilon and Omega, back in the times of the Great Vampires, and even before, the Doctor knows what she must do. She needs to find Rassilon. She needs to find Omega. She needs to find out who she was and all it is that she forgot.

Characters: 13th Doctor, Yasmin Khan, Ryan Sinclair, Graham O’Brien, Rassilon, Omega.

Chapters: 10/?

6) This Is Where It Gets Complicated...

Summary: “Doctor!” He called out again, garnering a few looks from passers-by but he ignored them for now and began moving back the way they’d came, hoping to find either her or at least his grandson and Yaz if his initial search yielded no results, “Doctor?!”

“Oh hello! Hi? What is it?” Graham blinked, head turning at a male voice coming from his left and his frantic push through the crowds came to a stop as he looked at him, puzzled as to why he’d responded. The man was young looking, had dark hair that flopped over his face and looked as though he’d just stopped running his hands through it. He was dressed like someone three times his age in a tweed jacket and bowtie, but he pulled it off well enough, Graham supposed.

“Oh, sorry mate no. Not you, I’m looking for a friend of mine, they keep wandering off. The Doctor.” Graham didn’t stay still for longer than he needed to, waving the young man off as kindly as he could as he started walking again. He missed the slight grin that appeared on the guy’s face, but he definitely realised it when the man was suddenly at his side, helping him move through the crowds.

Characters: 13th Doctor, 11th Doctor, Yasmin Khan, Ryan Sinclair & Graham O'brien.

Chapters: 3/3 complete

7) Start Of Time

Summary:The Doctor falls from the TARDIS into Sheffield. But not in the 21st Century. Back in the 1970s where UNIT haven't been expecting their scientific adviser back after he regenerated and had his exile lifted. So who's this strange woman that's shown up talking about the TARDIS and searching for a Doctor?

An AU of The Woman Who Fell To Earth where the 13th Doctor gets tossed out in the 1970s and finds UNIT rather than her fam.

Characters: 13th Doctor, Brigadier Alistair Gordon Lethbridge Stewart, Mike Yates, John Benton.

Chapters: 4/?

8) The Chain

Summary: “Who am I?” he exclaimed indignantly, hands flying about everywhere as he spoke, his head turning to his two companions as if to look to them for back up in the indignation and then he spun back, “I’m the Doctor. So, who is it? Which one of you said that you were me?” They stared for another few seconds, all not knowing what to do before Graham reached out a hand and hit his fist twice against the large metal piping that ran up the side of the room and up through the ceiling above. It gave off loud metal clangs and he called upwards, his voice hesitant.

“Uh, Doc?” there was a thump and a curse from up above, the Doctor no doubt dropping something and her voice rang through, echoing through the metal chamber up above that she’d had to crawl into the look into the problem.

“What is it? I’m a bit busy.” The man in the bowtie paused suddenly, glancing upwards at the hole in the roof where the metal grating cover had at one point been sat. Now just a hole into masses of wiring and ventilation and mechanical shafts.

Characters: 13th Doctor, 11th Doctor, Amy Pond, Rory Williams, Yasmin Khan, Ryan Sinclair & Graham O'brien.

Chapters: 1/?

9) It Means The World

Summary: Then she realised the heavy silence that had followed her question. She found it strange, her conversation with Jo so far had been light hearted in nature so it was a big shift for it to suddenly feel like this. She looked away from the book shelf she’d been perusing through and back to Jo who was staring at her with sad, pity filled, eyes. The Doctor felt her hearts drop to her stomach and dread spread throughout her body at that expression. She knew it far too well.

“Doctor...” Jo started, her tone gentle, but the Doctor cut her off with a shake of her head.

“No.” The word came out whispered and Jo’s face only scrunched up further in guilt and pity.

Characters: 13th Doctor, Jo Grant, Yasmin Khan, Ryan Sinclair & Graham O'brien. Sarah Jane Smith (mentioned)

Chapters: 2/2 complete

10) 3rd Best Enemy

Summary: “Who is your greatest enemy?”

“The Daleks.” The words fell from her mouth before she could stop them and for a moment the room fell silent. The Fam all took clear obvious steps back as the Master whirled around to face her, his victorious grin giving way to clear offence. They were trapped in a truth field, not exactly like she could’ve lied to him if she’d tried. She did feel bad though, just a tiny bit, his ego might not be able to take this. She took a few steps to the left so she was between him and her friends and waited for him to splutter out a response finally.

Characters: 13th Doctor & The Master(Dhawan)

Complete

11) Can't Let Go

Summary: “I’m sorry I keep dragging you into my messes.” Jack’s gaze snaps back over to her, confused at her words, and even more confused at how she looks down at her feet. Her expression ashamed. She’s sat on the floor of this cell, one knee held against her chest by her arm, the other leg spread out in front of her. He frowns. He wonders for a second how the Doctor hasn’t figured out yet that he would follow her anywhere. Always has. Always will. He casts one last quick glance out the bars of the cell into the beautiful emptiness of space before he turns and moves until he can drop down next to her. Close enough that his arm almost brushes her shoulder but not enough to actually be touching.

Characters: 13th Doctor & Jack Harkness

Complete

12) Welcome Home

Summary:Instead of that though he reached for her face with one hand while the other slid around her comparatively smaller waist so he could tug her closer to him until her body was pressed up against the hard line of his body and his mouth was almost instantly on hers before she could even utter a greeting. She really should’ve seen this coming. She let him have this one, hands resting on his upper arms, as long as he didn’t push his luck. They hadn’t seen each other in a long while.

Eventually there was a loud, obvious, cough from across the console and they pulled apart, both turning to look at her Fam who were all staring at the pair with varying degrees of embarrassment or confusion.

Characters: 13th Doctor, Jack Harkness, Yasmin Khan, Ryan Sinclair & Graham O'brien.

Complete

13) Threatening to Stab? Not That Bad

Summary: “Threatening to stab someone isn’t actually stabbing them. There’s a difference.”

Characters: 12th Doctor, The Master(Gomez) / Missy & Nardole.

Complete

[goffilolo]

Revival of Midoriya Izuku chapter 3

It’s been 84 years huh? As always the fanfic is up on ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16929483/chapters/52652386

also im aware of like some formatting issues with the fic when it comes to tumblr, so reading it on ao3 might be better if you particularly care about like italics and what not, but otherwise it’s all the same stuff.

“Move your ass Boom Boom Bitch, I wanna get there early!” shouted Izuku, as him and Bandit sat on rather stylish, but uncomfortable couch in the Bakugous’ living room that was probably worth more than both of them put together, which probably wasn’t even that much anyway since they’re both garbage, but it’s about the principle of the thing.

“Shut your mouth you Trash Twink, I’ll get there when I get there! And what the fuck are you doing in my house?” screamed Bakugou all the way from upstairs, although with his voice being as explosive as his quirk he might as well be standing right next to you considering the damage he does to everyone’s eardrums.

Speaking of hearing damage “Katsuki!!! Is that how you talk to our guest you rude brat?! Get over here!” exclaimed Aunt Mitsuki.

“Shut it old hag! Deku’s not a guest, he’s just an annoying cockroach that invites himself wherever he wants and does whatever he wants!” which is a fair point, considering Izuku has invited himself to Bakugou’s first day at UA for less than wholesome reasons. Some people might see it as the ultimate bitch slap to Bakugou’s ego (partially true), but for the most part it’s merely a testament of how far Izuku has come, considering he now only sees UA as a place where he can flirt with Tensei’s hot brother, rather than a means of accomplishing some bullshit dreams... But it’s not like Kacchan knows any of this, so he can fuck off.

If you were to ask Izuku what his deal with Bakugou was, he would reply “Best friends, duh” with enough sarcasm to last you the next ten years. If you were to press for any specifics his reply would be more along the lines of “I dunno, get the fuck out of my apartment” followed by having Trash Bandit sent after you. The bottom line was, his relationship with Bakugou was complicated, as were most thing in Izuku’s life, but that’s not unusual.

Izuku’s presence at the Bakugou household though? That’s quite unusual, yet more likely than you’d think.

And although the screaming match between the two Bakugous was ever so entertaining Izuku had places to be, and guys to seduce, so “Leave it Auntie” he exclaims in a dismissive manner “We don’t want to rile him up too much, otherwise he ain’t gonna get that 30-day chip from the anger management that he’s been gunnin’ for” he adds half-jokingly.

“I know, I know” she says “But you’d think he would act a little nicer by now, after all these months of therapy.”

“Wouldn’t expect miracles if I were you Auntie, you know what the say; Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree ” replies the boy with a shiteating grin as he motions towards Bakugou descending down the stairs, not missing the way Mitsuki flinched ever so slightly at his rather obnoxious comment.

“And to think you used to be such a nice boy yourself, I used to always tell your mother how great it would’ve been if Katsuki was more like you” she says in a mix of bittersweet nostalgia and regret.

“Yeah well, considering the shit I got for being nice , I think from now on I’d rather be a bastard and then some” exclaimed Izuku as he got up from the couch with Bandit in tow and made his way towards Bakugou. The other boy was getting ready to leave as well and his excitement for the day was concealed even more poorly than his mother’s discomfort at the current conversation “Have a good one Auntie!”

And with that, the two teenagers and one (1) sheep were on their way.

“Kacchan please , not everything is about you” said Izuku exasperatedly, hurrying over to the only empty seat on the train.

“Like hell it isn’t! This was supposed to be MY DAY, my first day at the school of my fucking dreams, and you’re trying to ruin it by following me around dressed like a dollar stripper!” replied Bakugou in a whisper-scream. He may have anger issues but he wasn’t a dumbass and the two of them were already drawing enough attention as it was. It wasn’t exactly easy to remain unnoticed on a train while carrying a green sheep; a task which fell on Bakugou, because Izuku was a weak-noodle-arm-bitch.

“First of all, I’m flattered that you think I’m worth a dollar” said the weak-noodle-arm-bitch in question “And second of all, this is my best outfit.” Said best outfit consisted of a worn out tank top that had THE HOES written on it in what once was a glittery pink; a pair of booty shorts with ENEMY OF STATE hand stitched onto the backside and rainbow patterned knee socks. The look was completed with a pair of pink platform crocs, because Izuku had standards ... and because he was short.

“God I hate you” murmured Bakugou.

“Don’t I know it Kacchan?”

The rest of the train ride was spent in silence.

It wasn’t until they actually reached the gates of the school that Bakugou had a thought; one that he probably should’ve had before they even left his house, but having a coherent thought while carrying a sheep and bickering with the sheep’s owner about whether the sheep should be referred to as a dog or not is in all fairness not possible.

“They won’t let you in” he said, voicing the sudden epiphany.

“Sure they will” replied Izuku.

“Oh yeah? How? Deku, you don’t fuckin’ go to this school, you don’t go to ANY school!” shouted Bakugou, because they were no longer on the train, therefore arguing with a lunatic stripper looking guy was now acceptable.

Izuku for the most part did not have a problem with that, because not only did he love having petty fights with people, he also loved proving them wrong, especially when everyone and their grandma accuses him of being a high school drop out.

“Shinjuku Metropolitan would beg to differ” he says, dropping the metaphorical bomb on the unsuspecting dipshit that is his childhood friend, after which he continues to walk, crossing the gates of UA High like he owns the damn place.

After about a minute of Bakugou standing frozen in shock, he finally snapped out of it when Bandit decided to start chewing on his uniform “Oi, hold the fuck up!” screamed the blond as he followed Izuku inside, while the sheep was being dragged along like a betrayed ragdoll  “Did you just say Shinjuku Metropolitan?!”

“Kacchan, you know I can’t hold you, you’re too heavy” replies the other teen, while pointedly ignoring Bakugou’s question and the looks he’s been getting from the students.

“Don’t change the subject shitty Deku! How the fuck did your ass get into a top non-hero high school in the whole damn Tokyo you bitch?”

“What, like it’s hard?”

“I fuckin’ swear to God-”

“Do it! Pull the trigger piglet!”

“WHAT’S GOING ON HERE?”

Their pointless quarrel, which was on a steady way into becoming a straight up brawl (Izuku having already pulled out his axe and lighted a cigarette using one of Bakugou’s warning explosions) came to a stop when they were interrupted by one of UA’s teachers, although in Izuku’s opinion she made a wrong career choice, considering being a Dominatrix probably paid more.

On another note, when someone asks you ‘what’s going on?’ that doesn’t mean they’re actually interested in whatever is happening at the moment, it means ‘stop’, therefore Izuku’s answer to that question, which usually involves something along the lines of “You see, I’m small, horny and full of rage, and I have no outlet for these emotions” is rarely appreciated. That is not to say that the lack of appreciation is going to stop him from spawning whatever dumb shit comes to his mind when faced with the judgement from authority figures. If anything it makes everything worse.

“That’s just how we flirt” replied the teen instead, all the while looking THE Pro-Hero Midnight dead in the eye and putting out his cigarette on Bakugou’s uniform jacket. Bakugou, for the most part was unable to even be mad at the cigarette burn considering he was busy recovering from being metaphorically punched in the kidneys by that line.

“And why aren’t you wearing uniform?” she asks suspiciously, pointing at Izuku’s attire.

“Oh, I don’t go here” he replied casually.

“Then pray tell , why are you in this school?”

“To get laid”

“TO WHAT?!” screamed Bakugou in surprise.

At this point Midnight took out her phone (no, her costume doesn’t have pockets, please don’t ask where she keeps it) and clicked on one of three contacts she keeps on her speed dial.

“Principal Nedzu, we got a situation…”

After telling Bakugou not to worry and that he will see him later in class, Izuku was dragged to the principal’s office by Midnight.

On the way there he tried cracking up another joke, telling her that his safe word was ‘avocado’. She did not appreciate that one either. For those of you wondering what happened to Bandit, the sheep ended up following Bakugou, much to the blond’s dismay.

Now, being sent to a principal’s office, especially of a school that you don’t even attend is usually a sign that you have royally fucked up. Not for Izuku though, because he had a plan! Contrary to the common belief, Izuku is not dumb. The fall didn’t kill off any of his brain cells, only his ability to give a shit, which made life much easier since he no longer had to worry about things like: people’s opinions, social norms, laws and heteronormativity.

Anyway, back to the plan. Izuku was not dumb, therefore even he knew that wandering around UA while not attending the school would not fly. He needed a way to stay, and for that he needed the guy who runs the whole shitshow; Nedzu.

Which is why the moment Midnight opens the door to the office Izuku stomps in like a man on a mission and stops right in front of an animal of questionable origin in a suit that is allegedly UA’s principal. A little unusual, but if a scumbag like Endeavour can hold the title of No. 2 Hero in Japan, then an animal can run a school.

The principal in question was calmly sitting on a couch and drinking tea, totally unconcerned with whatever bullshit Izuku was about to throw at him.

“Now, what seems to be the issue with this young man?” asked Nedzu.

“This young man-” said Izuku, pointing to himself in a rather cocky manner “has a message for you!”

“And what would that message be?”

The principal’s question was answered with what Izuku can only think of as the ultimate power move, or in this case; a literal ace up the sleeve. The boy proceeded to pull out a Monopoly “Get out of Jail” card out of his shorts (since he technically wasn’t wearing any sleeves) and slam it on the table right in front of Nedzu.

While to an outsider the current situation might seem absurd, it is important to remember that Izuku had a plan; one that could’ve never come to a fruition without a little help from the most unexpected person, which is why that card was no ordinary Monopoly card, but a very specific reminder that only Principal Nedzu would know the meaning of, and when he picked it up and flipped it around, the neatly written message on the back made its presence known.

It read: “You owe me one. - Hisashi”

“My dad says ‘Hi!’ ” exclaimed Izuku, taking one look at Nedzu’s face and knowing that he already won.

Was cashing in on a favour that his dad secured like 10 years ago a morally good decision? Debatable, but it got the job done so he’s not gonna complain. All that mattered was that Izuku now had a pass to enter the UA grounds whenever he pleased and nobody could stop him, and so here he was about to enter the classroom where Kacchan is supposed to be in. The bell hasn’t rung yet so he still had some time and who knows, maybe the handsome guy from the police station was in the same class?

With that in mind he opened the gigantic door and made his way into the classroom and was met with what looked like a pissing contest between his crush and his childhood friend.

“REMOVE YOUR FOOT FROM THAT DESK! SUCH AN ACTION IS INSULTING TO THOSE WHO CAME TO UA BEFORE US AS WELL AS THE CRAFTSMEN WHO MADE THIS DESK!”

“LIKE I CARE! WHAT MIDDLE SCHOOL ARE YOU FROM, YOU EXTRA ?!”

Ah yes, pissing contest at its finest, which meant that Izuku had options . The most obvious course of action would be siding up with Tenya and taunting Kacchan, which is not something Izuku would ever say no to. However , it also happens that the object of his affections had a massive boner for rules and authority, which is the exact opposite of everything Izuku stands for, so siding up with Kacchan it is.

And so he made his way to the pair of bickering teenagers and promptly pushed Kacchan’s feet off the desk, earning a scoff from the blond and an approving but baffled look from Iida, which only lasted for about 2 seconds, because Izuku being the gay disaster that he is simply HAD to ruin it all by claiming the desk as his sitting spot and giving Tenya the most ridiculous bedroom eyes that had Kacchan fake gagging like his life depended on it.

“Umm...Izuku, was it?” asked Tenya, feeling awkward under the other boy’s intense gaze.

“It sure was” replied the boy, feeling happy about leaving enough of an impression to be remembered from all those weeks ago “Fancy seeing you here, huh?”

“Indeed-”

“Oh for fuck’s sake Deku!” exclaimed Bakugou, completely fed up with the cringeworthy display in front of him ���Just tell four-eyes that you came here because you wanted to see him and be done with it!”

“WHAT?”

“Kacchan, not now! I’m trying to put on some moves!”

“Well your moves are shit-”

“Hey, aren’t you that guy from the news who stabbed a villain in the eye with an axe?!” shouted one of the students while pointing at Izuku. There was something ironic about the fact that it was his stunt on live TV from 2 weeks ago that got everyone’s heads turning and not his iconic outfit, or inappropriate behaviour, or literally anything else about him. Like that’s just rude ok? And interrupting him while he’s trying to flirt? Also rude.

“Bitch, I might be” he replied anyway, because his reputation was on the line and because at this point literally everyone has gathered around the desk that he sat on, so things were way past the point of return. People were throwing questions and accusations at him left and right, Trash Bandit is nowhere to be found and his quil flask is not full enough for this bullshit. At this point Bakugou simply got up from his seat and sat at the back of the room, as far away from this nonsense as possible.

“It’s you!”exclaimed the boy with dual coloured hair and equally mismatched eyes “You’re the guy who keeps T-posing in front of my house. Can you please stop?!” he asked with the most deadpan face Izuku has ever seen despite his voice being filled with desperation.

“Look, I T-pose in front of a lot of houses so you’re gonna have to be more specific” he replied sarcastically — despite knowing exactly who he was talking to — since it probably wasn’t a good moment to mention that you’re besties with that person’s mom because you were both stuck in the same loony bin and so you already know all the family drama and have dedicated a good portion of your time to harassing her abusive piece of shit husband…especially with like 20 people around you.

“You’re the one who egged my limo!” shouted one of the girls at the back. She was a very tall girl with long, dark hair tied in a seemingly gravity defying ponytail and a kind face. She had an air of a distinguished lesbian about her, which Izuku could respect even if she was rich if the limo comment was anything to go by. He egged several limos in his lifetime because seeing rich people out in public makes him go apeshit, as it should, so really how is he supposed to remember everyone?

“And I will egg it again!” promised Izuku “When I see rich people out and about it triggers my fight-or-fuck response”

“Don’t you mean fight-or-flight?” she asked.

“No”

“Are you ok?”

“Not in the slightest”

And with that more people joined in on the conversation, including a particular girl who very much looked like an alien with her bright pink skin and black sclera who ended up complementing his outfit, which thank fuck someone here actually had good taste , as well as a guy who ended up being Ms Shouji’s son, and the only reason he found out was because the guy recognised his antics based on the gossip his mom told him and isn’t that a small fuckin world? And in the middle of it all laid an inconspicuous yellow sleeping bag that has been conveniently ignored by everyone for the sake of the plot up until now.

The sleeping bag began to seemingly unzip by itself and soon enough Bandit’s head poked out of it.

“Bandit! There you are”

“Baaah!”

“Guys! Look at this dog!” exclaimed one of the students who Izuku thought looked like a personification of weed, but he wasn’t going to say that. At least the guy knew what he was talking about.

“I’m pretty certain it’s a sheep-” added Tenya, taking his role as the last standing voice of reason in this room very seriously, even though his voice has practically drowned in the sea of teenagers chanting ‘good doggo’, similarly to how one might feel if they were standing at a dance floor while Baby Got Back started playing.

It’s also important to note that while all of this was happening, Bakugou who has sat himself at the back of the room was forced to witness the chaotic force that is Izuku interacting with multiple people at once while being able to convince about 20 of them to refer to his sheep as a dog, and in that moment he turned around staring into the void and asked himself “Am I having a fuckin stroke?”

“Nah, he’s always like that” replied the one person who was sat at the back along with him that Bakugou previously did not bother to notice.

“And how would you know, you damn extra?” asked Bakugou somewhat offended, because sure him and Izuku were not on the friendliest terms and the whole incident from last year really changed him and what not. But they still knew each other their whole lives, so really that had to count for something and Bakugou was not willing to compromise on that with some random extra who looked like a Tinky Winky humansona on drugs.

Unfortunately Bakugou was not able to get an answer because the entire class was interrupted by a homeless looking guy coming out of the yellow sleeping bag to shame student kind. “If you’re here to socialise, then get out” he said. Soon enough the room was filled with a tense silence as the students were unsure of what to expect next.

“It took 8 seconds for you to quiet down. Time is a precious resource. You lot aren’t very rational, are you?” asked the man as he walked to the front of the classroom, making it very clear that he was in fact their teacher. The man was rather tall and unkept, his hair was long and slightly curled, similar to Izuku’s own and the outfit he wore could only be described as a goth onesie. There was something very familiar about him but Izuku couldn’t quite make out what it was supposed to be.

However, just because Izuku’s memory aligns very closely with a slice of swiss cheese doesn’t mean that the same can be said about the teacher in question. As soon as he turned around to get a good look at his new class his eyes fell on Izuku and his face has swiftly shifted from that of practiced disinterest to shock and recognition that Izuku honestly was not expecting.

“What are you doing here problem child?” asked the man with a certain degree of disbelief in his voice. Once again there was something very familiar about him and the way he addressed Izuku and wait a minute did he just call me a problem child? That can’t be-

“Uncle Shouta” exclaimed the boy in a way that felt uncertain, yet childishly hopeful “Is that you?”

“Of course it is brat, who else would I be?” he replied with a hint of amusement.

[gamebunny-advance]

Kind of A Downer

I think I’ve come to accept that the stuff I make gets attention mostly based on subject rather than the content.

And that’s fine since I cover relatively niche subjects (or niche subjects within popular fandoms), so the folks that like that stuff must be really into it like I am which is cool, but still... I can’t help to be a little... I dunno, disappointed about that I guess? Everything about this situation is my own fault, I’m not blaming anyone for it. It’s just how I’m feeling.

Anyway, sorry to bring y’all down, it’s just something I had on my mind. They’re not finished, but I’m gonna go ahead and post what I’ve done for what I’m calling the “Mahou Smash Project” so far. Right now it feels less like, “What if all the Brawl fighters were magical girls?” and more like “What if all the Brawl fighters wore skirts?”, but I’m working on it.

This is roughly the first sketch I did to flesh out the concept. It’s a little more difficult to think of stuff for the non-human characters without just giving them bows, but I’ll try to think of more ideas. Kirby is actually based on an outfit he had from “Super Kirby Clash” that’s called “Magical Girl”. I like it as a shoutout, but I’d also like to do something more original.

No matter how many times I tried to let Mario keep his cap, I felt like it never really went with the rest of the outfit, so I chucked it. I really liked the idea of giving him head wings to call back to his “wing cap” from 64, but it conflicted with Pit being in his group that already has a wing motif, so in later sketches I scrapped it. (His stars also conflict with Kirby, but there are so many star/space themed fighters on the roster, so I don’t think that part is as noticeable). Otherwise I really fell in love with the initial design and it doesn’t really change that much over my several iterations of him.

Originally Link’s inspo was from “Ojamajo Doremi” since the hats were kinda similar. I tried to incorporate a lot of triangles in the design to represent the triforce, but I’m not sure how I feel about the inner dress yet. I like the shape, but I’m not sure if it suits him. I might wind up giving him shorts later.

I had a really hard time with Pit since his outfit is already kinda magical. The most I could really come up with was to add a few more embellishments and make some accessories less “bulky”.

I think Tabuu is actually the second sketch I did when I thought of the idea. At first I was planning on combining this AU with the human!AU to make designing the non-humans easier, but I decided to challenge myself and just keep everyone as they were. It’s a shame because I think this hair suits his design a bit better than the original, but if there ever is a final version of this project, he’s gonna stay bald. His ability is: Morpho Anguish

Of course I had to try these two at some point. R.O.B. has a royal motif to represent how he ruled over the lesser ROBs, but it’s a little difficult to think of accessories he can realistically wear while keeping most of his original silhouette and get across that he’s a magical girl too.

Unlike other designs where the idea for the costume preceeded the ability, I thought of GW’s ability first and then the costume. His ability allows him to “cook” anything into existence from food to people, but he can only do the “complicated stuff” with his cookbook, which is in Tabuu’s possession.

Another sketch of these two. This is when I realized that Mario’s wings would overlap with Pit’s. Speaking off, it’s not super obvious, but I eventually settled on “ballerina” as a theme for Pit so I could distance him a bit more from his original outfit. Specifically he’s inspired by “Swan Lake”, thus the first iteration of the feather skirt appears.

TBH, Wario isn’t super inspired yet. At first it was just a take on Mario’s outfit, but I think I’d like it come a little closer to his WarioWare design since that’s his default in Smash. The crown and cravat is supposed to represent a “W” though, so that’s something.

The most recent iteration of Pit. I let him keep his bodysuit so he could retain some modesty since I draw the skirts on so short, but I honestly think it clashes with the rest of the design. I’ll have to find a way to incorporate more blue into the design if he’s gonna keep it.

Mario is mostly the same from previous iterations, so Luigi takes a lot from him, just a “little” different. I like the striped socks as a shout-out to the Mario & Luigi games, but I don’t like how he takes some of Mario’s red when Mario doesn’t take Luigi’s green (I tried giving him the green striped-socks, but they didn’t look good). I might take them out if I iterate on him again. Luigi’s ability is: Electric Moons.

Another tough one since her design was already kind of magical. I feel like all I did was shorten her dress and add some bows, but sometimes that’s all you really need to do. Her ability is: Blooming Rosales

Originally she was going to be more “knight” themed and keep her helmet since her power suit reminds me of those medieval suits of armor, but I can’t really draw armor, so I chickened out of it. It’s not super apparent, but her skirt is supposed to be transparent. If I come back for her, I think I’m going to work on making her an actual suit of armor so that there’s more difference between this and her zero suit form. Her ability in this form is: Stellar Cannon.

I feel like this is less “magical girl” and more ”Judy Jetson”. I like it, but I think it should be frilled up a bit more. I wanted to add some more flower detailing to represent the pikmin, but I think it really clashed with the “old-timey astronaut” thing he’s got going on. It’s still on his helmet, but it really sticks out, doesn’t it? His ability is: Plucking Gardens

Last two. I might find a way to reintroduce their hoods, but I love the idea of a hat that’s comically small. The pompoms on their hats and shoes are supposed to invoke cherries since they’re often drawn as a pair, but I don’t think it really comes across that way. Popo’s ablity is: Icy Flurry. Nana’s ability is: Freezing Snowfall. Together their ability is: Twin Blizzard

[pinehutch]

(Thoughts about living in a body, some things are tagged but also, content warning for like, extreme self-indulgence and a whole lot of words.)

Pull up a chair (god knows I have), and let me tell you about living in my body. 

Something always hurts. You are 38 years old;  of course something always hurts, but sometimes what hurts is the reassuring prick and hot-cold lance of the Sunday evening injection site. Prick of the upper thigh, show some leg, know that your fingers will unfurl in the morning in a way that’s pulled along by your intent. 

You look younger than you are, if you are not too tired, if you have dyed your hair to hide the silver that started coming in at 22, if you’re performing the right kind of agelessness. The skin on your face has faint freckles and very rarely any blemishes, faint lines on your forehead since your mid-teens. One slightly dark spot that you’re keeping an eye on, that you remember to keep an eye on only for 2 minutes every day, while you’re brushing your teeth. You resolve to keep an eye on it. You forget by morning. 

It is a good face. It has nice eyes, and a rosy mouth, and a pleasant structure. You’re not exactly proud of it, or your hair, but you’re on decent, civil terms with the above-the-bust zones. You know that not wearing makeup is a privilege you have, that other people spend money and time and energy on makeup to appear to have it as good as you do. People will say kind things, and strangers may smile when they see you. 

You still wish you knew what to do with makeup. You still wish you could signal, here I am, look at me, I am trying to tell you something with this face. You are not in control of what your face is saying to people. The consequences of this lack of control are presenting an appearance unrelenting openness. Strangers may talk to you when they see you. 

Strangers! They have so many opinions! They will see you walking to and fro, and they will say to themselves, I believe that is a woman, and they will say to themselves, I have an opinion about this womanish person, this body, and they will say to you you gorgeous and you fat slut and you stuckup and you freak and you tits, you red hair, you hips. They will offer you a ride in their van (oh my god, their van), and will follow you for three blocks to ask if you have a husband, and they will shyly approach you in the produce section, and they tell you about their friend who is A Big Girl, Too, and they will throw pornographic comments at you on your second meeting, they will insist you do not need that size jean, and they will spit in front of you as you try to keep your head down, to keep moving. 

They have watched you at the gym, and they have laughed at you. (They don’t matter, and they are few and far between.)

(Every now and then they will give you thoughtful compliments sometimes, on the things that you’ve chosen. You should always give thoughtful and appropriate compliments to people, when you can.) 

Your body does not feel like it is yours alone. It is you, but it is not yours alone. It is a public and a private, personal nuisance. A man on the subway bumps against your ass four times in two stops. A woman on an airplane looks grim when that ass means you wrap an extender around your hips, pushed up up out of the seat. (Ha, seat.) Your shoulders are broad and you go to a show in a lovely old theatre and the whole time, you are curling, curling, curling inwards. You are muscle and bone, and you are trying to be a flower, folding petal-soft and unobtrusive. 

You cannot be unobtrusive. You simply do not fit. You have clothing in a range of 8 different sizes and you could wear all of it on the same day. Every dress is too short. 

Your body can be useful. Yes, it hurts, and it’s tired, and sometimes even the gentle push of your hands through the water for thirty minutes means your fingers will ache for a day and a half. You can’t always open a jar without a knife, but you can lift a heavy object onto a high shelf. Can anybody reach that? You can. You can walk for miles in the city dragging fifty pounds of luggage and you will even recover.  You can, on a good day, manage a seven-k trail, or ramble in the woods for some hours. You can carry the potting soil up to the third floor deck and fill the planters. You cannot climb out of the pool without a ladder, or you will limp for the rest of the week, and wear wrist braces. 

You can manage. You can live in your too-tall, too-broad, too-strong, too-fragile body, and you can live well in it, when it is only one part of you. 

You live in the world. You live in the world and so much of it is spurred by hatred and money and the money you spend to stop hating yourself. When you are 20-something, you start looking for alternatives. (You think you are looking for cute clothes; you find new ways of thinking, about your body, about all bodies, about bodies which are people. You find some cute clothes, too. Seeing the forest doesn’t take you out of it.) You learn that there are people who have functionally stopped hating themselves. You stop, functionally, hating yourself for being the body that you are. 

It gets easier, for a while. It never goes away, but it does get easier, and you learn so much about how you can be a person, a person who is and who has and who lives in a body, and never only any one thing. You practice telling yourself that every body is a good body, even while you read deeper and wider and realize that not everyone can feel that their body is a good body. Even if all of those systems and people and rules that say this body is good but this body is not good were not in place, not everyone can feel that their body is a good body. Some bodies aren’t even very successful at their primary function (i.e. being alive). Some bodies hurt all of the time. 

Ten years later, and your body becomes one of the kinds of bodies with above-average premature mortality rates. It becomes one of the kinds of bodies where something hurts, all of the time. For a time, you cannot manage very well at all. You cry a lot, because you are in pain, and you are frightened, and nothing works, and you lose a year of your life to hands locked in fists and panic attacks and vomiting up different combinations of meds. The (terrible) social worker will tell you that heels are not a part of anyone’s identity, and ask if you’ve tried eating kale. Your mother will say that you should lose weight; you do not walk on your hands, though. Your father will tell you that the same disease is in his wife’s lungs. Your boss will tell you, with kind eyes, about the long-term disability accommodations available to you (it’s only a forty per cent salary cut). The pamphlet will tell you that statistically, you will not be able to work for more than 10 years from this point. People who love you will kindly remind you that you had been working too much, volunteering too much, and that stress is probably a triggering cause. 

You will leave that year behind. You will leave it, walking and swimming and carrying on. You will dance in the shower again. You will learn to speak up when you are in crisis. You will never wholly stop feeling betrayed, and it is impossible to tell where the betrayal came from: did your body betray the you-of-your-mind, by detonating the sleeping danger in your genetics? Or did your mind betray that you-of-your-body, by pressing too hard on the seal holding back that self-immolating flame? It’s a never-ending, tedious dialogue. (Is it my fault? It is my fault. Is it my fault it is my fault is it my fault it is.) 

You will learn to smile at your reflection again. People will say, you are beautiful, and you will know it is true for them, and that if you are beautiful like a whale, like an iceberg, like a thornbush, like a moonroad, like a forest, like anything lovely and grand and untouchable and inhuman - at least you can take comfort in good company. You try to turn that misty gaze upon yourself. 

You would like to look at yourself in the mirror and see only a person. You would like to look in the mirror and see only a you-who-is-whole. You will, you resolve. One day you will. 

*** 

So, I’ve been tired beyond tired this week. I’m sleep-deprived and not clear-headed, and this was terrifying to write, but it comes from a place that is as honest as I can make it. In frank terms, I’m 178 cm tall, and right now my every piece of clothing I’m wearing is a ‘straight size’ XXL and made of super soft jersey, because I’m in my pyjamas. My wardrobe ranges from a regular XL to “I got this wool coat made-to-measure because nothing else would cover my hips without falling off my shoulders.” 

The thing is: I started consciously and deliberately seeking out information on body positivity and on fat acceptance in, I dunno, 2002? 2003? I learned so much from intersectional feminists on the internet who were having complicated and often very personal conversations about bodies in general, and about ‘fat’ bodies in particular (what’s a fat body, anyway? what’s a tall one?), and then about the ways fatness intersects with race, gender, class, and ability besides. By the time I got to thirty, I was genuinely relieved to not be wasting energy hating myself on a daily basis. 

And I mostly don’t, still, most of the time. I’ve never quite ‘gotten over’ the sense of bruised identity that comes with a chronic illness, and the way that having a body that is physically more vulnerable has made me feel more mentally and emotionally vulnerable to the kind of social weapons that we/they use against our/each other’s bodies. I continue to do the work of trying to be neutral-to-positive about my body (it’s just me! it has no more or less moral weight than any other body! neat!), but when I feel generally worn-down and otherwise a bit hyper-aware of bodies, it’s really, really hard. 

At least once a day for the last several weeks I have had to stop whatever I’ve been doing when, unprompted, a thought like “it is impossible for someone to want you” or “you are, objectively, disgusting” crosses my mind. (I don’t know why my inner critic is so formal! Just a super-big jerk, really.) I think in words, so it comes just like that, in clear and precise words, and I have to stop and interrupt myself. Usually this is just a pause, and a shake of my head, and a breath, and I throw myself back into whatever has been otherwise occupying me. 

It’s fine - it’s mostly fine. Maybe this is normal, maybe this is how everyone experiences their physicality and their subjectivity. And it will be better in the morning, so now I’ll stretch my hands and fingers, and rest. 

[staytheb]

Closer

Pairing: MX’s Hyunwoo x OC [Chaewon] || MX’s Hyungwon x OC [Siyeon] Genre: slice of life, slight fluff Word Count: 2,470 Summary: Siyeon and Chaewon have plans to go to a friend’s engagement party. Siyeon find out that Chaewon had invited two plus ones on the day of the event.

Warning: none

oh hello! back with another story, but not of NCT, dunno when that’ll be added lol, anyways this one was part of a series, but i just took one of it’s chapter and revised it as a oneshot and changed some things around. i’m happy with this and hope y’all enjoy reading this as much as i’ve revised it lol but yeah, i think there will be a part two i just don’t know when it’ll be up. other than that happy reading and kthxbai, Admin Lia~

"Ugh, I hate dressing up." Siyeon muttered to herself as she spritz a bit of perfume all over herself before exiting her room.

Her sister, Chaewon, was already dressed and waiting in the living room. Chaewon gave her sister a once over with an impressed look.

"I'm surprised you had that in your closet."

"I know. I bought it a while back, but never actually used it."

Siyeon tentatively touched the dress she wore.

"Does it look okay?"

"Twirl around." Chaewon ordered while twirling her index finger to indicate her sister to do the same.

Siyeon rolled her eyes, but nevertheless twirled. Chaewon nodded in approval.

"Not bad. Yonghee's gonna be so surprised."

"I know, but compare to you I won't stand out too much."

Chaewon also spun around with her dress twirling around her.

"Not too much for the future bride. It's still her moment."

"True."

Siyeon then sighed.

"I dunno if I'm gonna last in these heels."

"Wear flats." Chaewon suggested.

"None match this dress."

"Sucks to be you."

"Jerk."

"Anyways," Chaewon checked herself out once again the living room's wall mirror, "I thought Yonghee wasn't going to have an engagement party though?"

"She didn't." Siyeon answered also doing the same thing as Chaewon. "Yongin's parents insisted and so we're going as Yonghee's family since you know her whole family history and such."

"Yeah, but I'm surprised it's not a traditional style though."

"I think they're doing the westernized version to keep it simple while they'll do the whole traditional one for real later on."

"I would, too. I'm just happy to know that life is blessing her."

"Me, too. Anyways, let me change out of the heels first."

It actually took a while as Siyeon contemplated whether to changed out of her heels or not and ended up going in the heels much to Chaewon's annoyance.

"Let's go." Chaewon urged.

"Okay, okay."

Siyeon had opened the main door and immediately closed after seeing their significant others on the other side.

"This can't be real." She muttered to herself as Chaewon's brows furrowed.

"What can't be real?"

Siyeon turned to face her sister.

"Um, Hyunwoo and Hyungwon are here."

Serena cast her sister a confused look.

"And I don't know why."

"Just open the door, Yeon." Chaewon ordered with a firm tone despite her facial expression seeming like she did know why they were there.

"I understand that your boyfriend stopped by, but not sure why Hyungwon would come over."

"Hyungwon is your boyfriend, too."

"It's complicated, Won. There's no real label to our relationship."

"I know."

Chaewon cast her sister a smirk as Siyeon shot her a pointed look.

"You told them, didn't you?"

"Maybe?" Chaewon answered nonchalantly.

"Why?"

Siyeon whined as Chaewon rolled her eyes.

"Just open the door or we're gonna be late and that's a bad impression for Yonghee's sake."

Siyeon groaned a bit childishly, but reluctantly opened the door with a feign smile.

"Hi."

Siyeon actually took in account of their attire and knew that Chaewon had definitely told them about Yonghee's engagement party.

"Hi, babe!' Chaewon greeted Hyunwoo happily.

"Wonnie, you look beautiful."

Hyunwoo complimented his girlfriend as the pair leaned towards one another to share a kiss before hooking arms and walking out first towards the elevator leaving the other pair behind.

"This brat." Siyeon muttered as she closed the door.

Hyungwon's small cough got her attention.

"Yes?"

Siyeon looked at Hyungwon.

"The color compliments you." Hyungwon complimented as Siyeon suddenly turned shy.

"Uh, thank you. You're pretty dashing yourself."

"I know."

Siyeon rolled her eyes in good-nature.

"Anyways," Hyungwon trailed off as he pointed at his cheek expectantly while giving her a teasing look.

Siyeon eyed him before swiftly planting a small peck and rushing off to catch up with the others. Hyungwon chuckled, but nevertheless followed after and caught up to Siyeon with his hand easily slipping into hers.

"Wow, you look so beautiful in your engagement dress, Yonghee." Chaewon complimented her friend as she hugged her.

The trio were finally able to talk just the three of them once things settled down after all the whole announcements and both sides meeting one another.

"Yeah. I believe this is the most girliest I've ever seen you dressed up so far, Yonghee." Siyeon cooed with happiness as she hugged her friend as well. "And that you're really getting married."

Yonghee laughed as she hugged her friends.

"Thanks and I know right. But look at you, Siyeon. You're just as girly as me."

Siyeon scoffed.

"You're just lucky that it's a special occasion."

"Thank you so much, but I still feel like it's still all a dream to be honest."

"Well, it's a dream come true and we're all happy for you." Chaewon stated with a smile.

"Yeah, just wish my side were just as supportive as you two."

Yonghee slightly frowned, but Siyeon disagreed.

"Hey, Yongin's parents love you and they'll also be your family, too. Your own happiness matters before others."

"True. Anyways," Yonghee slyly cast Siyeon a look, "I heard you're getting hitched next, yeah?"

"What? Not even. Who told you that?"

Siyeon shot her sister a disbelief look before returning her attention onto her friend.

"Chaewon's the one that's gonna get married before me."

"True, I do want to get married, but it'll happen if it happens."

Chaewon shrugged nonchalantly as Yonghee chuckled.

"I mean, Hyunwoo seems like a dependable guy and the two of you seem quite serious."

"Yeah, well, we've only been dating for two years."

"But known one another for at least six years though." Siyeon interjected.

"Yeah, but you and Hyungwon are the same, just there's no label." Chaewon countered with a smirk.

"I agree." Yonghee laughed. "I mean, I know you, Siyeon, and you can't say that he doesn't matter to you."

"Whatever."

Chaewon and Yonghee laughed just as Hyunwoo came by.

"Hello, ladies." He greeted the trio while placing an arm around Chaewon's waist.

"Hello." Yonghee greeted the male.

"Sorry to interrupt, but Chaewon and I have plans we need to get going."

"Ah, right. I forgot." Chaewon said as she remembered. "Sorry."

"It's all good, Chaewon. Thank you for coming. To you as well, Hyunwoo."

"Thank you, Yonghee, and congratulations once again."

Yonghee and Siyeon watched as the pair walked off. Yonghee then nudged Siyeon playfully.

"Where's your lovely date?"

"I have no idea."

When Hyunwoo appeared, Sieun expected Hyungwon to follow after, but didn't and looked around to search for him although he wasn't in sight.

"I'm sure he'll stop by soon. I noticed you were looking for him."

Yonghee chuckled as Siyeon denied that she was looking for him.

"I wasn't. I was just stretching my neck."

"Right."

Now it was Yongin who stopped by and greeted the two.

"Hello, ladies."

"Hello, Yongin." Siyeon greeted back.

"My parents would like Yonghee to meet some other relatives and so I have to interrupt your get-together."

"I didn't realize your side had so many." Yonghee joked as Yongin chuckled.

"Neither did I."

"It's all good. Have fun you two."

Yonghee made a face yet an evident smile graced it as they bid one another goodbyes. Siyeon watched their figures in admiration of how much they truly loved and cared for one another.

"A lovely pair, aren't they?"

A male suddenly spoke next to her and she turned to see who it was, but didn't recognize the guy.

"Um, yes, they are." She replied out of politeness. "Do you know Yongin or Yonghee?"

"Yongin."

He smiled at Siyeon, but the smile didn't quite match his eyes.

"And how about you?"

"Both, but I've known Yonghee longer."

"I see."

He sheepishly laughed as he shot her a sheepish look.

"Oh, where are my manners? I forgot to introduce myself. I'm Kim Sungjoo."

He offered his hand for Siyeon to shake to which she did out of polite mannerism.

"Lee Siyeon."

After she introduced herself did she quickly pulled her hand from out of his grip when he unexpectedly kissed the top part of her hand while trying not to make a face at the action he just did.

"My apologies. A gentleman's habit."

Sungjoo smiled apologetically, but Siyeon just faked smile not believing him.

"Ah, I see."

Siyeon tried to refrain from wiping the back of her hand against her dress.

"So, Siyeon, are you here alone?"

He continued conversing with her like they were now familiar with one another.

"I have my car on hand if you wanna ditched this place."

"No thanks."

She shook her head with mild disgust.

"Aww, don't be like that. I know this great restaurant in Gangnam and I'm sure you'll lo-"

"I'm pretty sure she said 'no thanks'." Hyungwon interrupted Sungjoo in a firm tone as he stood beside Siyeon.

He placed a comforting hand at the small of her back.

"And she's with me, Sungjoo."

"Ah, Hyungwon. Hello."

Sungjoo greeted him with a mocking-like tone with a click of his tongue.

"You're not with Heeyoon?"

"No. I'm happily with Siyeon now."

Siyeon stayed silent not wanting to intervene nor caring how the two knew one another, but was grateful for Hyungwon's arrival. Although her heart did slightly flutter upon hearing the last part.

"That's too bad. I thought the two you would continued with your on and off relationship."

Sungjoo cast Siyeon a look.

"But Siyeon is a great catch."

He was about to skim his fingers against Siyeon's arm, but she instantly moved her arm from out of his reach.

"Yeah, no. I don't think so."

Sungjoo's jaws tightened upon the rejection, but remained cool.

"I'm sure I can change your mind, Siyeon. If you give me the chance."

Hyungwon was about to tell Sungjoo to back off, but Siyeon beat him to it.

"Like I said before, no thanks. Now if you'll excuse us, my boyfriend and I have somewhere else to be."

Siyeon put emphasis on the boyfriend part as she locked arms with Hyungwon and maneuvered themselves in the opposite direction leaving the other male to glare after them before storming off in another direction. Siyeon glanced back, saw that Sungjoo was no where in sight, and let out a relieved breath. She also let go of Hyungwon's arm, but Hyungwon lacked their fingers instead this time around.

"What are you doing?" She asked while giving him a look.

"Holding my girlfriend's hand because she let go of my arm."

He grinned while speaking in an obvious tone.

"Since when was I your girlfriend?"

"Since you called me your boyfriend a moment ago."

"There's no label, remember?"

"I don't recall."

Siyeon grew a bit flustered, but tried to remain cool.

"Well, anyways, you heard wrong."

Siyeon tried to free her hand, but Hyungwon firmly held on.

"No, I heard it right and I actually have a place in mind that we can go to."

"Why?"

"Because you're the one that said that we had somewhere else to be."

Siyeon scoffed.

"I only said that to get that idiot to back off."

"Either way, we're still going."

Hyungwon cast her a grin before leading them out of the venue.

Hyunwoo and Chaewon were at the N Seoul Tower at the Locks of Love while deciding what to write on their padded locks.

"Hey, what if we break up after all?" Chaewon mused as Hyunwoo glared at her.

"Don't say that."

"I mean, we can still be friends afterwards."

"Then did that mean you never really loved me?"

"Um, do you wanna find out?"

Hyunwoo grumbled as Chaewon laughed softly while playfully shoulder bumping him.

"Why are you so adorable?"

"And why do you like being a tease?"

Chaewon chuckled softly before placing a kiss on her boyfriend's cheek.

"Because you're cute."

Hyunwoo rolled his eyes, but nevertheless he felt giddy about the whole exchange as she scribbled a message onto his lock with Chaewon doing the same. Soon they interlocked their locks with the others and admired the sight with their own hands interlocked.

"So, a year from now we'll come back to read them?" Hyunwoo asked a moment later.

"No."

Hyunwoo eyed his girlfriend as Chaewon chuckled before answering.

"They'll probably be more covering them by then is what I was getting at."

"Oh."

Chaewon cast a smile at her boyfriend.

"But I'm sure we'll still be together even if we don't see our locks by then."

Hyunwoo smiled and nodded in agreement.

"By the way," Hyunwoo spoke as the pair left the area, "Were you able to take the seventeenth through the twenty-first off?"

"Oh, for your birthday weekend?"

Hyunwoo nodded a bit sheepishly.

"I already did, but just have to add in the extra two days."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

The couple shared a kiss.

"Now, it's just a manner of how to explain to Siyeon that it's not technically a girls' trip that weekend anymore and for her to add the extra days."

Hyunwoo chuckled with a shake of his head.

"You really loving messing with her, don't you?"

"Mmhmm."

They shared another kiss as they later explored the rest of N Seoul Tower for the remainder of their date.

"The mosabuka for the gentleman."

The cafe owner of Cafe Saru placed the drink in front of Hyungwon before setting Siyeon's items before her.

"And the lady a scarlet and a milk tea."

"Thank you!" Siyeon thanked the barista.

"Oh, and one more thing."

Siyeon was confused until she saw the male hand her a canola flower.

"Thanks for stopping by Cafe Saru."

"Ah, you're welcome, and thank you."

Siyeon took the offered yellow flower as the owner smiled before walking back to attend to the other customers. Siyeon admired the flower as Hyungwon admire the woman before him while sipping his mosabuka.

"So," Hyungwon began.

"Hmm?"

Siyeon hummed as she placed the canola flower aside and took a sip of her milk tea.

"Are you free next month between the seventeenth to the twenty-first?"

"Um, no. Chaewon and I have plans to go to Jeju that weekend with our other two friends. Why?"

"No reason really. Thought we could go on a trip together and get a little closer and work on our label better."

Siyeon eyed him as a playful expression graced his face.

"Why the sudden interest?"

Hyungwon rolled his eyes, but remained calm as a ghost of a smile lingered upon his lips.

"No reason really."

Siyeon scoffed.

"Yeah, right, but anyways, like I said I already have something planned those days."

There was a brief moment of silence before Siyeon suggested something else.

"Um, maybe we can try another time when I have more free time."

"Sounds good."

Siyeon missed the ways Hyungwon's lips quirked up as he drank his mosabuka while her focus went onto the drinks and flower before her.

[vee-angel]

Bimbo Bailee (Chapter 1, part 2 repost)

(Part of the Pervert Pentet Series. Content warning: subtext of tragic loss)

_____________________________________________

“Hmmmm.” she made the noise as she struggled to figure out the puzzle before her. Her eyes narrowed to closely examine the sidewalk below. She’d happened to be walking past a nightclub with a rather substantial queue of people spilling down the street. It was evening now, so she’d switched from her tank-top and micro mini-skirt into a pink tube top and ultra-mini skirt (it was really more like a belt made of fabric than a skirt); she used the public changing room a few blocks from her house, the little one with the glass walls and the old-time telephone on one side. At least this one guy she knew told her that it was a changing room. She kinda remembered something about how Superman changed clothes in a thing like that so it made sense to her. The guy said how the glass seemed clear from the inside, but that in reality nobody could see in because it was two way glass or something? Bailee thought it was really complicated, but he obviously knew better than her. She always liked to get totally naked when she was inside there and act really slutty since nobody could see her. She’d shake her tits or spread her ass, or sometimes even masturbate. There weren’t that many of the telephone changing booth thingies around anymore, so she figured that this one was kind of a tourist attraction, what with the big crowd and all the people taking pictures when she was inside. By a big coincidence, she always managed to get to it right before the crowd formed! How lucky is that!

“Hmmmmmmmm.” She bent down further to try to examine the sidewalk. One of the really nice men in the line had told her she’d dropped something and she should bend down to pick it up. After a few seconds of looking, she’d told him that she didn’t see anything, but he assured her that something was down there and that she should keep looking. She was sooo lucky that men were so patient with her. She wasn’t that bright, and she had no idea what she’d do without nice men helping her the way they always did. Like that doctor guy who told her that it’s better for her body that if, when she bends over, she plants her feet wide and bends at the waist with her back straight.

“Hmmmmmmmmmm.” She kept repeating the noise while she kept trying, like, really super hard to figure out what she dropped and why she couldn’t see it. It was starting to make her head hurt, and she’d been bending over to look for it for probably a good two minutes now. Finally she stood up and apologized to the nice man who told her she dropped something. That’s when she noticed that there were several people behind her who all seemed to have their camera-phones out and pointed at her.

She hopped in excitement; the huge, firm, silicone tits almost whacking her in the chin as she did so. “Oh my gosh! You wanna take my picture? Yay! Thanks, everybody!” She quickly flipped the golden waves of hair that cascaded over her shoulders and struck a pose. She may not have been so good with thinky stuff, but this? This she was good at! It was the number one most important thing for a girl to know how to be pretty and sexy, after all! She stuck one fingertip in her pouting mouth and raised one leg in a coy pose while making sure to stick out her tits and ass. After a few seconds she switched to a more confident pose; hands on her hips with her shoulders back, tits thrust forward obscenely.

“Oh wait!” she quickly pinched and twisted her nipples through the semi-sheer pink tank top to make sure they stood out more through her clothes. Guys like it when girls do that, she’d learned. She went back to the boobie pose with nipples sufficiently erect. She switched to a sensual pose where she closed her eyes and raked her hands through her hair. But she couldn’t help but think that she could get some better pictures for the nice men if she had an object to play with, like a lollipop or… oh! Or another girl!

She quickly scanned the line of people before her glassy eyes set their sights on a cute Persian-looking girl with 32D tits. Bailee giggled for a moment; she may be have been dumb, but at least she wasn’t dumb enough to have small tits!

“Hey, 32D! Come over here and make out with me for some pictures!”

The girl glanced down at her chest and then back at Bailee. “Wait, how did you know?”

Bailee just giggled in response. Geez this little slut was stupid. How would she ever get guys if she didn’t know how to rank and compare girls. Men do it all the time automatically, so Bailee made sure she was constantly aware of how she ranked compared to all the girls around her. She was currently number one, and she was giving the 32D girl a chance to be second, only the little ditz was just standing there.

Bailee sighed, she was a 32J, so she was obviously the girl in-charge around here. She grabbed the tan little dummy and shoved her tongue down her throat. She seemed surprised but didn’t seem to object. 32D actually started getting into it once Bailee took one of her hands and stuffed it under the pink tank top so that she could have a chance to see what real boobs feel like.

Bailee wasn’t into girls that much, but what she was into was doing anything to get attention from men. They really liked it when girls made out with each other or licked each others kitties. In fact, Bailee was pretty sure that the whole “lesbian” thing was just a trick to get boys to pay attention to them.

The little Persian girl was starting to make these sensual little moaning noises; at least she wasn’t a prude. Bailee was glad, she hated prudes! She remembered that guys really like pictures of girls licking each others pussies or buttholes, and it was her job to make guys happy. So she squatted down, making sure to spread her legs so everyone could see how good a job she did shaving while she pulled up 32D’s skirt, but she gasped when she saw what was underneath.

“Oh my god! You’re wearing panties?!? Gross!” Bailee always thought panties were really dumb. What’s the point of even wearing a dress if you’re just going to cover up your holes anyway! And besides, everybody knows that pussies need to be uncovered to be healthy. That’s why it’s always best for girls to wear the shortest skirt possible and always sit with their legs open.

After she got over the initial aversion, she started feeling sorry for the girl. Obviously all girls want guys to put their dicks inside them, but the flat-chested little ditz was too dumb to know how. Bailee decided to help by yanking the girl’s panties to her ankles. She made a little noise of objection, but didn’t end up resisting. She just got this really embarrassed smile while everybody took pictures of her little mocha-colored pussy. Bailee had her step out of the underwear, which was a pain. Imagine if this girl had to do all that while a nice man was waiting to put his cock in her butt, she thought.  

She held the garment at arms length as if she was holding a dirty rag and walked over to drop it in the gutter. When she turned back, 32D was covering her face in this giggley embarrassed way. That was good! Boys seem to get super turned on when girls are embarrassed. Bailee went back over and squatted down to stick out her tongue as far as she could and licked at the girl’s bare pussy gingerly. The light-brown girl had her pubic hair shaved into a little heart, which Bailee liked. At least she prepared to have her kitty on display. She tried to stay facing forward so everybody could get both of their naked crotches in the picture. Bailee really only flicked the girls clit with the tip of her tongue. It was more important that all the nice men get sexy pictures than it was to actually pleasure the panty-wearing dummy.

32D seemed to get relaxed a bit after that. She even took the lead and posed for pictures with Bailee’s giant boobs; pulling her little tube-top up, holding the firm-pink orbs with her little hands, even pinching and pulling her nipples. She had to admit, as dumb as this girl might be when it comes to getting cock, she could have been a lot worse!

After a few minutes, 32D introduced Bailee to her boyfriend. He looked Persian, too. Also, he dressed like he had a lot of money. He offered to pay Bailee’s way into the club so that she could hang out and have fun with them all night.

He was even nice enough to buy her a drink and he put this special vitamin in it that he said would keep Bailee from getting a hangover the next day. She must have drank a lot, because she didn’t really remember much of what happened after that. Later that night, she had a vague sense of being in a hotel room while a bunch of really awesome guys took turns having sex with her. That made her happy. She also thought she heard the nice Persian man talking with one of the men about money. Geez! What a workaholic! Who talks business while a girl is trying to get lucky!

***

Bailee woke up the next day to find herself laying in a bed in a hospital room. This cute young Indian doctor with a boyish look noticed she was awake and came over to her. He paused for a moment, seeming a bit flustered.

“Hello, Bailee. How are you feeling?” he started with this super hot English accent.

“Ummm, I dunno. I think I had, like, a super fun and good night last night. I kinda remember getting to do like, a lot of sex, and I got to give a bunch of guys blowjobs.” she paused to think for a moment, “Oh, hey! Do you want a blowjob? You’re totally, like, super cute.”

He seemed a bit flustered, “Umm, no. That’s quite all right. The police found you passed out on the couch of a hotel lobby. You… didn’t have any clothes on. They brought you here to make sure you were okay. We learned that you had a rather substantial dose of Rohypnol in your system. Do you have any reason to believe that anything happened last night that you didn’t agree to?”

Bailee shook her head, “uh uh, I think I had a really fun night.” she said before giggling. As she was answering, this hot older woman with silver hair and a lab coat came in. Bailee thought it was silly the way she was dressed. She might be middle-aged, but she still had a good body. Maybe her and Bailee could go out and pretend to be mother and daughter to pick up boys! Guys were totally into that sort of thing.

The older lady leaned over to the cute boy doctor and whispered something to him. She said something about Bailee’s “fee-an-say,” which Bailee figured was a fancy doctor word she didn’t know. And she said something about how Bailee hasn’t been the same since.

Suddenly it occurred to Bailee that hospitals were really sad and totally not fun and that she didn’t want to be in one anymore. So she put on her heels and told them that she was going to go home now. They said some doctory stuff and made her write her name on this really boring paper, but at least they let her keep the cute gown that let everybody see her butt. She could totally use that for costume parties or sexy roleplay. Maybe she could even go out and tell everybody that she has a disease where she needs cum to survive. Yeah! That’d be perfect! After all, guys could be super gullible when it comes to sex. They’ll fall for anything when they’re horny! She was sure glad that she wasn’t like that.