#but you cant grow or move on
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Something I noticed in today's entry that I hadn't before was Dracula monologuing about his "heritage" (def just him in different moustaches and clothing). The most notable line to me at the end is when he says, "blood is precious in these dishonourable times of peace," and 1. That's such a raw fucking take. 2. It makes me a bit sad for Dracula? Bc think about it. You were raised a war lord of the huns (if I read this monologue correctly), your entire purpose has really been to protect your land from being enslaved. You've been fighting non stop and were praised and lauded for it, for being a blood thirsty monster. And then somehow you actually became one. And then the war times were over. And suddenly you're a monstrous relic of a bloodier time, something disapraged and rebuffed as a monster. People are afraid of you and no longer look to you as some kind of protector. And its because you're no longer their protector, you still need blood. You still want glory. You're still stuck in a time of war and blood and that's the very sustinence you have sustained yourself and this land on all your life. The world has outgrown it's use and need for you, but you're still here. You're still stuck here and now you're the very monster people fear. And you can't change, you won't change. What do you even do at that point? You can't outgrow your life's purpose, but the world around you has.
#dracula#dracula daily#im not saying he's sympathetic in the slightest and not defending him#i guess im just stuck thinking about this scenario#the world outgrows you#but you cant grow or move on#its no longer in your nature#to be a relic of the past living and breathing and stuck in a moment for all eternity#me personally id beg for death#but Dracula choses to move#and he can run and move all he wants but his nature never changes#was there ever a chance for him?
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It has come to my attention that people who haven't read the comics don't realise Wallace was the one who harassed scott into being his friend. Like he saw that nerd at uni and went oh yeah that's my guy now. This bitch would not shut up and showed up at his house uninvited to hang out till scott gave in and befriended him, then they got suuuper drunk and scott let him crash at his. He comes to family dinners, is best friends with his sister, and chats to his mum.
He despises envy more than anything and is furious when she tries to mess with his life again and scott gets hurt, so he cooks him breakfast and comforts him. He coaches scott in fighting and helps with strategies so he doesn't get his ass kicked. He bullies him to leave the house because there's a heatwave and he wants to make sure he doesn't get heatstroke. Like they're close enough Wallace walks around in his underwear (though scott whines about it).
I've seen people assume Wallace supports scott out of pity but that man is a bitch and morally questionable (affectionate), I do not think he would put up with it at all if he didn't want him around, especially given he can barely afford to support them both. When they stop living together he doesn't just kick him out it's because their landlord kicks them out, he actively enchorages scott to move in with Ramona out of care for him and offers to stay with him if he needs it, though ends up signing a lease with his boyfriend (in his defence scott didn't ask for him to stay and decided to try make things work with Ramona) but still let's him stay at the new apartment with them when Ramona kicks him out.
Yeah he's mean to scott sometimes and makes fun of him/is brutally honest but he basically became part of Scott's family and part of that is calling people out when they're being a total jackass and teasing them, he's that kinda guy and scott knows that he doesn't actually hate him or something. Yeah scott will do puppy dog eyes if he wants something but wallace is frequently nice to him on his own initiative and scotts not a suck up to Wallace, he can be a bitch right back at him.
They're a really important part of each other's lives. though I can understand people not familiar with the characters who watched the show thinking Wallace doesn't care about scott being gone, literally all the characters reacted super casually. Bryan has tried to clarify his way of trying to cope is him "being a jerk"/disconnecting/acting apathetic. Also in the show o'malley basically confirms Wallace had feelings for scott and that was why he had the affair with Todd and you can quote him on that, aswell as scott admitting how they became roomates was "somewhat gay" in the comics, so there's definitely some weird more than friends emotional mess tied in there.
comic panels i reference under the cut
TLDR wallace lives with him because he cares about him, whether you read that as still somewhat romantic or now platonic, with either interpretations fitting better with different versions of the story
#scott pilgrim#this comic means a lot to me if you cant tell#it made me less scared of growing up reading it for the first time in middle school and countless times since#because it makes it clear that yes scott starts off as an immature selfish self centered asshole#it is made very clear and if the reader still idolises him imo it is 100% on them and a reflection of them as a person#but the comics give him the time and care to give him real character development and shows him realising all the shitty things he's done#he learns from and owns up to and faces his mistakes and in turn matures as a person#and I know mid 20's isn't old but to 13 yr old me I was supposed to have my shit together by 18 man#so seeing him be shitty and fail as an adult and still become a better person meant I wasn't doomed if I messed up#also that relationships suck sometimes and thats ok#you can fix it or move on#anyway#ig this includes scollace ?#scollace#wallace wells#hi its me
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noah kahan really said growing up in a small, bitter hometown is about the rage and the hatred that's been sung about many times before but it's also about love and devotion and the 'all three of us were drowning and we didn't know how to save each other but there was an understanding that we were all drowning together' of it all and knowing people so intimately yet not being able to help anyone and he's morally grey at best in a lot of his songs and objectively the bad guy in others and that's just how it is and it's about substance abuse and normalised crime and teen suicide and country roads and failed exams and leaving and being left and love and hate and love and hate and love and
#anyway. listening to orange juice again. like it's my fault#girls when growing sideways and view between villages and northern attitude and homesick and stick season come on#like new england must actually be called that for a reason bc you cant convince me this guy isnt actually secretly singing about england#like even when he sings about the WEATHER im like !!! this guy gets it fr!!!#IM TIRED OF DIRT ROADS NAMED AFTER HIGH SCHOOL FRIEND'S GRANDFATHERS AND MOTHERFUCKERS HERE DONT KNOW#THEY CAUGHT THE BOSTON BOMBERS TIME MOVES SO DAMN SLOW I SWEAR I FEEL MY ORGANS FAILING I STOPPED CARING ABOUT A MONTH AGO#SINCE IT'S BEEN SMOOTH SAILING I WOULD LEAVE IF ONLY I COULD FIND A REASON IM MEAN BECAUSE I GREW UP IN NEW ENGLAND!!!#or the entirety of growing sideways. divvied up my anger into 30 seperate parts keep the bad shit in my liver and the rest around my heart#r u even listening. what the hell#HONEY COME OVEERRRRRR THE PARTY'S GONE SLOWERRR AND NO ONE WILL TEMPT YOU WE KNOW YOUVE GONE SOBER <- sobbing#noah kahan#stick season
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Time will change you, We all outgrow our roots.
SURPRISE I've been thinking about Rip again, jk that's not surprising. anyways text is Rips inner thoughts from Time Masters #8. sort of.
#rip hunter#my art.png#anyways reminder daffodils represent rebirth and new beginnings which i feel like rip also represents within the meta.#but also i could go on a rant about how rip did the whole ''learn the past cant be changed without gravely hurting everything around-#-you can only move forward even when looking back and grow with the changes'' before booster did. and he did it alone (his own fault)#rips battles with mental health and violent self destruction and realizing that he isn't always right r important to me. SIGH.#also let me go ahead and post this at 2am my bad#idk if i like this but i havent finished art like this in months so we move on.
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And some days, I just wish you wouldn't look at me at all.
#ffxiv#sketch#wol#meteor survivor#zenos yae galvus#adventurer zenos#oh no#its the consequences of his actions#everything is fine until the only man on the star you care about looks at you with the same contempt your father did#(Meteor's not doing it intentionally- its a reflex after he comes back for quite a bit)#and zenos is getting bodied because its been a while since... you know... him being able to really feel anything at all#and no- its not him regretting anything that had to do with varis- just him regretting the thought meteor could look at him like that#little does Meteor know he's emotionally bodying the man he's trying to be cordial with#its a little okay because in how I write adventurer zenos this serves as one of his main wake-up calls to make some changes#and realizing both the mistakes he's made with meteor and that meteor hating him in any way is actually -not at all- what he wants#but not okay on the end that every time meteor does this he has to watch zenos actively dissociate right in front of him#until zenos just kinda autopilots and walks away#the second time (or perhaps third) in the last 11 years that zenos has felt regret to any major capacity-#on meteor's end I just enjoy seeing the progression of the WoL through subtext#and why meteor is willing to even entertain the idea despite how much he hates zenos- his decisions and the path he's walked#is the realization that there is high chance that he could actually be a direct catalyst for zenos' growth#and the realization the wol has that they were the only one zenos has ever genuinely reached out to#besides- i just like the idea of having your equal other half fighting back to back with you- or being able to handle threats you cant#and i find their dynamic neat- of meteor not forgiving zenos but giving him his last chance- and growing to enjoy being around him#and zenos being able to work on moving past being the weapon or the monster- finding the connections he's longed for#and giving himself purpose to finally truly just live- for him to learn to experience and have the freedom to find what he enjoys#(and curiously him having estinien's brand of accidently helping people even in StB gives me ideas...)#but enough tag ranting- ill get to zenos' actual adventuring in another post lol
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Hey, I'm in love with your Lumiere and Nero arts, so if you're still open to requests can we have something for them both? :D
I made the mistake of listening to 'time will change you' by the crane wives, while drawing these two and now i cannot get them out my head
#Time will change you is such a nero song to me#my art#ask#secre swallowtail#nero black clover#lumiere silvamillion clover#You'll leave behind what doesn't move#Time will change you#We all outgrow our roots#Let go of what won't grow with you#< like you cant tell me that isnt her leaving behind her old life and name as secre to countinue as nero with the black bulls#im having so many thoughts after drawing them while listening to this song
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if we're talking about weird ways the prequel movies handled raven and erik, i still can't really get over how they
- made a huge plot point of first class physical mutations
- erased erik's physical mutation (his white hair)
- made raven's opinion on her physical mutation that she doesn't wanna hide it
- then proceed to have her shapeshifted and hide it almost constantly
- then gave quicksilver and polaris their unnatural hair colors that they should have inherited from erik
it's just hilarious to me. i wanna see the talks that lead to these decisions.
i think At Most i can justify raven hiding her true form as a way to protect herself and/or because she's insecure: evidently a lot of people dont act kindly to blue scaled women (tho i did wish she showed her true form more while at the cia base with the other mutants) and it's fair to assume that even if she wants to be out and proud she has some apprehension about it because of Aforementioned safety/confidence issues
everything else tho yeah LOL whats all this then. wasnt in the budget i support- tho i stilllll so badly wish that they at least let erik's hair go white in apocalypse ..... that woulda been cool at least .....
#snap chats#quicksilver having his silver hair could be justified in-universe as him dyeing it or something#i dont know. i cant speak for the decisions made when making these movies vjALKVAKJV#like if we reaaaalllyy wanna talk bout weird things the movies did i think my weirdest bits would be charles' family#i dont know why they had it be implied charles and his mother werent on good terms when it was pretty much the opposite in comics#i mean there really was no reason why raven couldnt shift into kurt marco but whatever#then its kinda funny how cain is just. Not Really Relevant. his family ties to charles isnt really relevant if i remember right#tho on that note it couldve been funny/horrifying if cain had to grow up with raven AND charles#congratulations you have two mutant siblings to hate now. jesus cjerLKAERERJ#BUT yeah. my cope at least is that these movies are their own isolated universes so w/e the canon is then ill take it#i do wish we got white hair erik tho. ill mourn that forever i fear. also mystique's cool outfit i wish we got that but mOVING ON
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can you imagine how strange siffrin must feel during his first birthday after the timeloop
#time marches on and you are changing and growing as a person and your family is here and you cant predict anything anymore#but it just feels so good to finally move forwards and progress even though its so scary#on a day meant to celebrate YOU#......... oh my god. is today even his real birthday or did he just choose it?#like. is that the first date they can remember? do they just FEEL like this day is important?#is it the day they met the party.........#echoed voice#isat spoilers#anyways i wanted to do art but i am out of energy im in another slump yayyyy
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"ive played in a canadian market ive been in st louis in the summer they won—ive never seen buzz like this" "we're really lucky we get to play hockey in such a nice place" the C and A clocking in on their Praise South Florida as a Hockeytown shift
2024-25 Media Day | 9.18.24 (x)(x)
#matthew tkachuk#aleksander barkov#florida panthers#2425#preseason#harper move aside maffhew is here to PANDER#you ever have fond feelings for guys who just love the place they play for so much#did i tear up a bit? admittedly yeah a little bit#any praise for this sports hellhole is good#idk man growing up here its just nice to hear guys talk good about it NOW instead of the glory days ya know?#“you cant win the cup tomorrow but you can try to build our game where we have a chance to make the playoffs”#matthew and his oration skills never cease to amaze me because he speaks to such emotionality#like okay??? should i run through a wall for you??? several walls??? yeah bud?????#not related but maffhew i dont have a lisp well say that to the mic that peaks anytime you have to make a fh sound my guy#“going to games is a lot of fun now” oh so you're just gonna drop that on me and not expect me to cry#yeah thanks mate real cool#sasha i want to hold you with the gentleness of a tuilip craddling a sleeping field mouse#if i tear up any harder snot is gonna be coming out me nose#i just think they :(
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Lol
#theres nothing quite like your mother saying Well maybe you shouldve been more careful because now your boss might think youve been flirting#with this male coworker (whom i like splendidly as a friend) and now maybe she thinks youre not trustworthy#and maybe she regrets hiring you because you said you feel like youre making a lot of mistakes this week and she might assume thats because#your head is filled with this boy.#so dont make her regret hiring you.#MA'AM I TOLD YOU I WAS ALREADY ANXIOUS BECAUSE I MADE SO MANY MISTAKES TODAY WHY ARE YOU MAKING ME ASHAMED#OF SOMETHING THAT I HONESTLY HAD NO CLUE I OUGHT TO BE ANXIOUS ABOUT AT MY FIRST NEW JOB AFTER IVE GRADUATED????#anyway going to bed i cant take this anymore LOL she said it so lightly and im like. well i never even considered#being afraid of making my boss regret hiring me somehow because of some kind of behaviour that i had no idea was sending some kind of signal#anywaysssss 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#and then she was like why are you crying?? 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀#not to be like this is partly why i didnt want to move home but confound it all why are things like this#can i not simply confide in my mother my anxieties and worriws#worries#and not also have to worry about her potentially being like Well have you considered you ARE right and it IS your fault?#idk man something something firstborn child eldest daughter can i have some room to breathe. please#also not to whine but Not my father walking in on me eating dinner at 10pm because i was holed up#in my room in a semi depressive state after so many gong shows in a work day and straight up having no appetite#but deciding my body needs the food anyway its better late than never.....walking in and then saying#you know if you eat this late you'll gain weight. SIR??????????????????#sorry to complain and rant again i simply cannot in this house and whats more am doing my best to honour my parents#but why is it so hard out here and how can they say stuff like that with a smile!!!!!!!#also i DO have an inner critic who is always like Its your fault you are the worst you should be ashamed always........why do my parents#not understand after knowing me for so long and watching me grow up#that i can make myself so ashamed of the smallest thing so easily and that what they say drives me to shame almost as easily?#ANYWAY LOL WHAT A DAY#you guys!!! i am working so hard i promise i PROMISE I am!!! it is my first full time job ever and i am working so so hard#i am doing my absolute best and no one sees it and that is FINE i just wish my parents would see that i AM trying!!#i come back home so dead every single day because i put in 120%! this is literally my first job after graduation#and my parents KNOW this has been the most exhausting taxing and soul crushing year ive had in my very short life so far
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first @yeehawgust prompt was 'gather the posse' and since I'm using this challenge as a way to explore new characters I just took that to mean "design the fuckers"
anyways, Whiskey and Tago. Tbh this pose was meant to be more a metaphor thing than literal, but it's making me strongly consider changing Whiskey to being a they/them(plural) instead of a they/them(singular).
#yeehawgust#Whiskey is an alabastor. Their parents own the local saloon where they and their mother work as barkeeps. their father also manages#a small ranch/farm that grows corn and has a decent number of cattle.#Tago is an outlaw whos just moving from town to town looking for honest work after spending too long doing the bidding of others#in big cities out to the east.#He doesn't like getting close to people. Literally. hes venomous and his touch is poisonous to the point of being lethal to most#Whiskey is the sort you really shouldn't get close too. They have a habit of driving their less constituted lovers insane.#they're a shape shifter who moves between faces/gender presentations as it suits them but they#cant do much about their coloration though. thats always the same and it irritates them to no end
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the most rancid drama starters in fandoms are always like "gee i wish this fandom was nicer, why do we have to fight all the time :("
#theres this one guy who is SO vile on twitter lol#he was in my tumblr notifs the other day and has left kudos on all my devils minion fics#idk if he missed the message or whatever#i keep hornyposting about marius so these folks dont get the wrong idea about me LOL#i guess im not hornyposting hard enough#anyway i was dying he's crying on twitter about how fandom is so nasty to each other#but every other tweet is him kinkshaming someone or QRTing a bad take instead of moving along#saying how “these people” (kinky folks) need to be chased off the internet#how marius stans belong on a list#etc#dude the call is coming from inside the house#anyway sorry for vauge posting i just cant believe my eyeballs LMAO#there was also this guy in VC fandom a couple years back who was SO nasty#and he made this huge plea to fandom abt how we need to leave ppl space to grow and learn and walk back their bad opinions when they learn#like my dude YOU are the one attacking everyone!#he was so mean to me lol#he wouldnt shut the fuck up making fun of my asexuality posts lol#like “gee why do queer ppl feel unsafe in fandom? cant be because i mercilessly mock everyone i've decided deserves my ire and abuse!” lol
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Do you think, when he was arrested, that Cell was seen as the same as any other prisoners? Do you think he resided in the same places, ate the same food, performed the same work? Do you think the guards saw him and his violent history and let him roam the same as the thieves whose POV we saw it through?
Or do you think they saw this barely 18-year-old, who turned to violence and cannibalism as a means to survive, and recognized the danger he posed? Do you think they held him down, fought against his struggle, and let the other prisoners know that he wasn’t like them?
Do you think Cell was confused, confused as to why he was so different from the other Brazilians that lived in those same conditions? Do you think that he saw them as threats not because they were ones, but rather, because he knew that they lived so much better than him, yet still wound up here?
Do you think this man— if you could even call this teen a man— saw JV, Pac, Mike, and Guaxinim as threats out of jealousy? Empty wishes that he could have lives their lives and made smarter decisions to be a free man roaming the earth?
Do you think he cried when they held him down and put that infernal thing on him?
Não.
Ele é um animal.
Os animais não sentem.
#mcyt#mcytblr#fuga impossível#f!cell#f!cellbit#fcell#fcellbit#headcanon#fuga impossível headcanon#mcyt headcanons#can you tell that im fucking ill#ohhhhh i could yap about fcell so much#ive always been fascinated by the concept of muzzling a human#and how often prisoners are treated as subhuman and abused#and i think its a really open parallel i could make of the abuse prisoners experience and#the hc of q/fcell being a cat#mixed with a muzzle#something about stripping the humanity from someone incarcerated#how all the prisoners would know cell ia dangerous because of the muzzle#like how being imprisoned permanently changes someones life usually for the worse#all the prisoners saw the muzzle; all people see the prison history#so do employers#and how people can recover and grow but will still be surmounted to their past crimes#just like how cell is surmounted to being a cannibalistic serial killer and he cant move on#and then my qcell design has scarring from the muzzle digging into his skin#like how even though he meets new people#people like tazercraft will see the scars and will remember alcatraz#how cellbit doesnt get to move on fully#how he “reverts” temporarily in purgatory#how hes always CELL even if its cellBIT this time
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that feeling when you get advice from someone who you know is well-meaning and has good intentions....but it's just the most allistic, neurotypical, and/or abled advice you have ever heard and completely invalidates the point you're trying to make about why you struggle to do the thing in the first place.
they're telling you to "do it in this specific way that is completely opposite of how you physically/mentally work" for example, make eye contact/read people's facial expressions and intentions! but you're autistic. initiate verbal conversation and don't be shy! but you're nonverbal or semispeaking. get out of the house more and participate in these physical activities! but you're physically disabled. Just Be Yourself! but you have DID/OSDD/other personality disorder. etc.
i'm sorry. I know you're just trying to help. I appreciate it, really. but it's all things i've heard before and none of it helps me specifically. I have tried (maybe even still try out of habit) and learned I can't just do those things. they don't work for me or cause more issues. practice isn't the issue. not everyone can simply willpower through everything. but thanks for trying 😔✊️
#autistic#autism things#autism#actually autistic#adhd#audhd#neurodivergent#disablity#disabled#too tired to tag other thinhs sorry thats all you get#lee rambles#that feeling when you also just have to pretend to accept their advice and move on because people get so upset when you dont take it#i lesrned if i tell people their advice doesnt suit me and my unique circumstances then they feel bad that they didnt help#they want you to do it anyway. even if you cant. pretend you do or say thanks and move on. but it gets annoying hearinf the same stuff#over and over. more expectations on you. more pressure to do things in ways everyone else can but you cannot...#when will the advice be lee shaped? when will it be just for lee and consider all my circumstances?#why is telling the person giving advice their advice wont work fkr me bad? why cant they change their advice to fit the issues i face?#when im asked for advice and someone hits a deadend while working it out i try to help solve that so they can find a way around#but everyone else expects me to grow a bulldozer out of my head and ram the wall down instead of helping me work around it#i crush their fragile ego by saying their advice doesnt work and they get upset instead of adjusting it to help solve the specific problem#its exhausting because they become one of the many problems i have to deal with then 😒#no im not “making excuses/dismissing you/not trying” im trying. your advice sucks try again. and my problems are valid!!!!!! accept it!!!!#anyway. genuinely appreciate people wanting/trying to help but sometimes its such inappropriate advice i dont know how to respond
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I’m not as wicked as you think me for. You’ll come to understand that, and maybe by then you’ll find yourself less scattered and we can meet again as fully grown people. I owe a lot of my growth to you, i hold no negative feelings, just a few brutal thoughts left unsaid. I have always and still wish the best for you, though.
#obsessive boy#obsessive thoughts#obsessive yandere#obsessive core#obslove#sadistic#actually obsessive#yancore#yandere bf#bd/sm sadist#obsessive love#lovesick#yandere#yandere love#love and deepspace#love#posessive yandere#self love#yanderecore#yandere community#love poem#irl yandere#yanblr#yandere blog#actually bpd#im sorry i cant wait for you forever.#i have to move on#i hope this doesnt make you hate me#my heart is grateful for the love we shared#blame me if need be but i hope that doesnt stop you from growing
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I haven't drawn anything for it and haven't written enough to post but it should be public knowledge how easy it is to make a childhood(preteen?) friends au with the twisted sisters
Oh Meredith spends all her time in the hospital her mother works? Well what if Cristina was in Seattle when she and her dad were in a car accident? What if when the ambulance finally arrived she was brought to Seattle Grace? And what if Meredith was hiding around in the ER trying to catch a glimpse of her mother working and ended up being awfully fascinated by the girl around her age who came in just now?
#itd a very fucked up childhood friends au#but like theyre just two traumatized kids who find solace in each other#cristinas not too hurt from the crash#scrapes bruises. they think maybe something's wrong with her head but its just a minor injury#maybe her shoulders dislocated (hehe)#shes. yk. not well#she wouldnt be like post plane crash with like completely catatonic except the violence#but i think shed be unresponsive#she doesnt fight the doctors trying to help her#but she doesnt like respond or anything#stares into the distrace#since she doesnt talk they cant get ahold of her mom for a bit#she spends some time in peds#idk how but meredith somehow makes her talk#uhm from there you can take it many places#does cristina move to seattle? do they grow up together? do they grow apart when meredith goes to europe?#do they then just happen to be in the same intern group?#or does cristina go back to beverly hills away from the person thats got her the most ever? maybe except her dad#and meredith is alone again#and then theyre both just there. remebering each other so clearly but the short friendship also feeling like a dream#or cristina just moves to seattle and everything is great forever#greys anatomy#twisted sisters#mertina#meredith grey#cristina yang#grey's anatomy#pzyii rants#my aus#greys anatomy rambles
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