#bartylus headcanon

[crescenthistory]

CARINAAAA 2K????? CONGRATSSSSSS

could i ask you to analyse bartylus with... potter!reader? 👀😳

THANK YOUUUUUUUU tihi<333 and of course you can lovely!

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i will ANALYSE poly!bartylus with potter!reader

carina's 2k celebration

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cw: fem!reader, references to black brothers trauma

this is james and sirius' best dream and worst nightmare handed to them on a platter

james' sibling dating regulus is literally something they have been dreaming, scheming and plotting of for years – "this is our chance to become brothers in law sirius!!!"

james' sibling dating barty crouch junior, batshit barty, the weird guy with the hair and the piercings and the tongue and the– please god no

"bubs please don't do this to me"

"i am not doing anything to you jamie, i'm just eating breakfast with my boyfriends"

"yeah, jamie, she's just eating breakfast with her boyfriends"

queue james and sirius having a joint seizure

though, i do think james eventually comes around, fuelled by that potter love and family loyalty, and he drags sirius with him into acceptance by the ear

while they might still grumble and sirius most definitely fakes throwing up at least once a day, they don't protest to barty going everywhere with them

(because barty is the only part of this they have a problem with)

(mcgonagall considers this karmic justice as she watches it all unfold in the great hall every day)

as for the couple itself, i think potter!reader and poly!bartylus would be a surprisingly healthy love story, despite the inevitable chaotic conception

firstly, the potter love is strong in reader and for you to shower them both in it would be a truly healing endeavor

the slytherin skittles have a lot of love to go around between them, but there is something about that brighter-than-the-sun, devoted, blinding, all-encompassing potter love that i think would just burn right through them and trigger every healing process

(much to both boys' initial fear and confusion)

secondly, the chaotic energy of someone who has grown up with james and been raised by effie and monty is the only one that can possibly match barty's unhingedness and adhd bursts

a potter!reader would also be rather grounded in a way that would help regulus keep barty managed – because that's an all-hands on deck type of situation

the dynamic in this trio would thus be rather balanced; equal parts fun, love and safety

not to mention that a potter!reader would be able to keep up with regulus and barty's verbal sparring – both regulus' jargon and academic debate-style and barty's snide comments and silly jokes

there are so many backgrounds for their dynamic that would make sense to me, so it's quite fun to play around with

i can see reader being affectionate to regulus because of sirius and him either being really fond of it or really adverse to it

depending on how resentful he is towards sirius and james at the time and how heavily he's clinging onto denial

either he's noticing her and feeling a warmth he can't quite explain OR he feels pitied or misunderstood and tries to run away at the sight of her

in the former case, barty would not want to be spending time with a potter voluntarily and tries to fight regulus on it until he meets you and becomes infatuated himself

in the latter case, barty would pick up on regulus' hesitance immediately (because he spends most of his time studying reg anyways)

and thus, both in a genuine attempt at helping him face reality and because he thinks it's hilarious, barty would be the one to seek out potter!reader when he's with regulus

thinking it will be a friendship for laughs but then oh. oh no. she's captivating.

alternatively, i can also see potter!reader seeing barty running around the castle being an absolute menace and going "that one. i want him."

(queue james pulling out his hair and marlene being concerned but still cackling loudly at the situation)

(because marlene would be a quasi-sister to potter!reader)

barty might at first lean into your attention and be like "haha this is going to mess with (james) potter so badly"

and then not even two minutes into talking with you he goes "fuck. it's going to mess with me"

it gives you and opportunity to get to know regulus outside of the whole situation with sirius and james and allows you to see him in a new light

when you're with barty and meet regulus, he's not somebody's traumatised little brother, he's the sarcastic and witty best friend – and that would do something to you

either way, bartylus have been in love for years on end without ever truly realising or acknowledging it

it's when potter!reader gets involved (in whatever way) that they understand "oh we're not just best friends, we're Best Friends, we're let's-spend-our-lives-together friends, which really is not friends at all"

(someone is bound to make comparisons between bartylus' and prongsfoot's belated realisations, and regulus will have to be held back from biting that person's head off)

the dynamic just works

chaotic but so passionately loyal

and we all know poly!bartylus would just be obsessed with her

mhm yeah i enjoy this. good food.

[evvvangeline44]

barty and regulus would be menaces on dress to impress. like serving top tier cunt. divas.

[moonyswarmsweaters]

Regulus would be the type to write fanfics but completely be in denial about it Like:

Barty: Regulus is writing fanfics again

Regulus: They are not fanfics, I am simply writing some poems and stories about my favorite characters.

Barty: That’s what fanfic means.

Regulus: Shut the fuck up you don’t know shit!

Barty: you make them all gay!

Regulus: THEY ARE GAY IN CANON TOO!!

[kskfkakkldnsna]

My personal headcanon is that Regulus Black had a tongue piercing while still living in Grimmauld Place. No one noticed because of how little he spoke.

The little lions little rebellion.

Barty did it with a needle in their dorms. James feinted when he first saw it. Peter caught James. Remus knew for months prior to it being revealed. Sirius shed a little tear he was so proud.

[managone16]

The recap of the Marauders era fanon would be that we grabbed Harry Potter's parents and their friends, dipped them into a pool of rainbows and fucking ran with them.

[chaosgremlinlivinginyourwalls]

regulus blacks real laugh is a snorty giggle and no one can tell me otherwise.

[a-great-tragedy]

Bartylus but they meet at a psych ward and do arts and crafts together

[writtenicarus]

you know, i totally get that people want to stick to regulus being tough and cruel because we have softened him too much, and i agree at the most part, but i also feel like regulus is so sensitive. he was a caring, loving child, the complete opposite of who he became. so within that, if you find a way in, he becomes just as sickenley loving. he cannot bare anything casual. he loves with his whole being. consumes. engulfs. he sleeps with stuffed animals. he needs barty to hold his hand when he panics in class. he is, in the words of mistki, a tall child.

[mitsukiixx]

Marauders Incorrect Quotes as things my friends have said:

Peter: What do you do in the kitchen?

Marlene[jokingly]: You put the woman to work

Peter: How do you write that in french!?

Sirius: Ce ne pas skibidi

Young Sirius talking to James after helping little Regulus with homework: It was division, THE LONG ONE

Barty to Evan: Let's transfer gum through our mouths

Sirius: Any takers? going once going twice

Peter: Am I being sold?

Sirius: No, You are being auctioned.

Sirius: Going once, going twice-

Remus: I'll take them

Sirius: One dollar for this thing

Remus: I don’t have a dollar, can I get them for free?

Sirius: No you can’t

Remus: Well if I give you head can I get them for free?

Sirius:...yes, SOLD TO THIS TWINK OVER HERE–

Sirius: What was I going to say?

Regulus: I don’t know, probably something idiotic

Barty: And you know what I have on my wall? “Live, laugh, lobotomy”

Marlene:I love how you guys are having a serious conversation while one of my nostrils is filled with cheez-its dust

[v7lgar]

i see so much of "jily is married but regulus had a silly crush on his brother's married best friend" but what if it was the opposite?

jily is married, bartylus is married (having tryst w evan now and then) but lily knows james has that silly crush on regulus forever because his type is mean ppl and she loves to tease him about regulus for years and one time they got together at family gathering (maybe christmas week?) and lily dropped the bomb at the table "yk james had that crush on you when we were back at the school, right regulus?"

now james is spitting his drink, regulus' jaw on the floor, sirius has the most frightened expression on his face because he did not know that, barty and evan is looking each other amused because well, well. i guess they didn't bully james and his squad for years for nothing.

[butyoureastarr]

Regulus Black did not die just for people to call Draco Malfoy the prince of Slytherin

[evvvangeline44]

I hate that headcannon thats like Regulus died without anyone knowing why, Pandora died trying to pay tribute to her dead best friend, Evan was killed for a cause he didn't believe in and Barty was left alone again to go insane without his star, moon, and sun. yk???

[moonsaa]

YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND

I love the old marauders

I love the new marauders

I love an au where jily comes after jegulus

The one that jegulus comes after jily

a jily au with no jegulus

a jegulus au with no jily

Marylily with or without jily

Pandolily

And generally any possible ship that I feel comfortable with

So many different headcanons in so many different AUs

Different characterisations in different fanfics

I sometimes would read something that isn't usual for me just to do it

I love any new changes and headcanons just as much as the old ones

I have nothing to fight against and at this point I just generally LOVE anything about marauders because its so important to me

And I really don't know how some peaple don't experience marauders like this

It's wonderful!!

[nixnight4]

I LOVE Black brothers using sign language to communicate with each other, but imagine Black Brothers blinking in Morse code to communicate without being notice by anyone

[managone16]

Someone: So, you like Harry Potter? Me: Yes!! Someone: Who's your favourite Harry Potter character? Me: Okay, so you know Harry Potter right? Someone: Uhh yeah?? Me: So you know his Godfather? Like the one in the third movie? Sirius Black? Someone: Uh- Sure? Me: Okay, so, he has a brother called Regulus Black who drowns trying to find horc- Someone: Okay nevermind- Me: No! And he's a little shit and a brat but I love him and James too-

[moonyandtoasts]

Beauxbâtons Reg 🤍