#This is such a ridiculous headcanon

[lunastars21]

Ya know what, shit post headcanon because I can:

Fang has no fucking clue what sex is, he was never taught about it because he didn't really have any friends or a guardian after a certain incident in his childhood. Bark and Bean know he doesn't know but are too awkward to explain it too him, Bean jokes that his true love will tell him and fang just bonks him on the head.

Now he isn't oblivious to dirty jokes, but his jokes are limited, because he just doesn't know what sex is, so you'll get a confused expression out of him if ya try.

AND once he IS told about it, he'll take an hour to process it as the song "Please Hold" from the Stanley parable plays in the background, because his thought was a lie.

God job fang

[zephyrchama]

We know there's cooking duty, and trash duty, and various cleaning duties that the brothers rotate who's in charge of. They take turns shopping for groceries. When MC becomes their attendant in Nightbrighter, some of these chores are foisted onto them.

Is there a laundry duty? Does MC have to do everybody's laundry? Does Asmodeus keep buying more and more outrageous underwear to leave on top of his laundry so he can tease MC?

---

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Whaddya think you’re doin’?”

Mammon walked into his room and caught you red-handed with a pair of his yellow briefs. He nearly flew across the room to snatch them out of your hand.

“Uh, the laundry?” You gestured to a basket of Mammon’s dirty clothes that had been collected from all over. “This would be easier for me if you left it in one place. Getting all of your stuff every week is like a scavenger hunt.”

Mammon threw the dirty briefs over his shoulder. They landed somewhere on the opposite side of the room for you to find again later. You looked at him in exasperation while reaching for a pair of crumpled-up jeans. His face had a rosy tint.

“Why are you doing the laundry?” he demanded.

“Because it’s my job as your attendant,” you answered.

“Wh-? Like, just this week?”

“I’ve been doing your laundry for the last three months, Mammon.”

He craned his neck forward in shock and waited a beat, as if you would say psyche. It’s not that Mammon couldn’t understand you, but this was new information he did not want to process. A hand rose to his forehead, sliding upwards as he pushed in frustration. “Well... cut it out! You look like a pervert. How would you like it if I did your laundry, huh?”

That’d be nice. “Could you, please? That would be great. I don’t have a day to do my own wash, given there’s seven of you and only seven days in a week.” Chores, RAD duties, and devilsitting took up every waking moment.

Mammon sighed and ruffled his hair. He muttered, “Seven…" In an instant, his attention snapped back to you.

"Seven? You’re doin’ everyone’s laundry?” he shouted.

You were ready to pull his jacket off yourself if he wouldn't cooperate. “Yes! And I’m short on time so just give me your dirty clothes!”

--

You cracked the door open ever so slightly. Leviathan was preoccupied with a game at his desktop, the back of his chair pointed at the door. The chair shook from the intensity with which he smacked the controller. Now was the perfect time. With the goal of being as quiet as possible, you crept into Leviathan’s room and made a beeline for his laundry hamper.

“Dooooooooooon’t touch those!” The pitch of his voice rose and fell impressively as Leviathan jumped and scrambled across the tile on all fours to physically block you from the laundry. Did he see your reflection in the monitor? His headphone cord popped out of the PC, its headpiece falling down to tug at his neck, and the gaming controller clattered to the floor. Leviathan slid in between you and his laundry basket like an athlete safely sliding onto a base.

In contrast, you just stood there wide-eyed with a tub of detergent in one hand.

Leviathan stammered a few times, realizing he might have overreacted. “So, uh. You see, Mammon gave us all an earful for letting you touch our clothes,” he explained. “He clearly didn’t listen when Lucifer told us you were doing it.”

“Oh, and you knew? Good job, Levi!"

You both smiled, Leviathan chuckled bashfully at the praise.

"Now give me your laundry.”

His face fell.

“No, wait! I knew you were doing it! But… you know, I never really thought about it. And for once, I think Mammon has a point. So, please!” Leviathan pressed his hands to the floor and bowed his head to the ground. A pose he learned from anime. “I’ll do my own laundry from now on! Just don’t touch it anymore!”

“Why? I've always been careful, I check the tags on your shirts so the colors don't bleed.” All of the brothers' clothes had insanely specific washing instructions. Compared to laundering suit jackets and leather and silk, colorful graphic t-shirts were a walk in the park.

Leviathan did not budge. "That's true. Still, I have dignity that must be protected!"

---

Beelzebub goes through almost twice the amount of clothes that his brothers do due to his regular workouts. Thankfully, he helps you carry them all to the laundry room so you're not struggling alone.

Beelzebub already had everything neatly sorted into two baskets - regular clothes and workout clothes. They were all ready to go when you showed up for the weekly collection. He let you take the lighter one.

Before the two of you left the bedroom, Belphegor called out, "are you doing laundry?" His head lolled over the side of his bed.

"Yeah, do you need anything washed right now? You can put it in with mine," Beelzebub kindly offered.

Belphegor wormed to the edge of his bed and picked up an empty pillow case. "I drooled on this and stuff. Can you take care of it?"

"Sure," you said. "Pass it over."

Getting up was far too much work. Instead, Belphegor loosely balled up the pillow case. With the world's laziest throw, he tossed it in your direction. It managed to sail through the air. It smacked the side of your head and landed on your shoulder.

"Thanks," Belphegor yawned, having already turned his back to you and Beelzebub.

[im-a-leo]

broke: Jake English would have that alarm clock that when the alarm goes off, a target board will come up and you have a little laser gun. if you shoot the target, the alarm would go off.

woke: Jake has that same alarm, but he uses an actual pistol to shoot it. Jade created it and they’ve installed extra target boards, so it will automatically reset for the next morning.

bespoke: Jade and Jake have installed a system where every morning, a target board will descend from a randomly chosen point in their respective rooms/outside the window. the target board will sound out a blaring alarm until they’ve hit the bullseye. they’ve both gotten very good at shooting the targets with their eyes closed and promptly falling back asleep. it only works about 50% of the time, so they keep setting more alarms. they keep forgetting to tell visitors about this.

[not-kat]

i can't be the only one who still thinks about maximum ride

[skullcfusher]

Ok maybe I’m funny just a little

[ohimsummer]

husband! gojo finally convinces you to stop staying up til the crack of dawn awaiting his return home. he cares too much about your well-being, and someone would have to kill him dead anyway before he just never came back. you go to bed at a decent time that same night, and your lover comes home to find you passed out in his shirt and all snuggled up with his pillow.

he loves that you’re getting some sleep, but he’s also….jealous of the pillow? usually gojo comes home to your warm embrace and sleepy kisses—something he does miss right now, but he’ll pester you for plenty of your affections in the morning. that should be him cradled up in your arms, him being squeezed to your chest. him cuddled up and being clung to like he’d disappear if you let go.

blue eyes narrow at what should be an empty spot beside you; the feelings haven’t subsided when gojo finishes his shower, and he borderline yanks the cushion from your grasp, slotting himself between your limbs and mentally cursing when you begin to rouse from slumber. he gives your forehead a soft peck, whispering sweet nothings to lull you back to sleep, and then places that blasted, home-wrecking pillow beneath his head to drift off.

tagz: @elusivemoon @anthoosies @staryukis @yunymphs @sttoru :3

[buckingham-ashtray]

john and sherlock bickering over the head of a very dead corpse might just be the most ridiculous thing in the entire show

[veryberryjelly]

bookshop and cafe date with jason todd <3

𝐧𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐠𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

someone headcanoned that jacob elordi is jason todd and i can't get it out of my head .!!.

models in this moodpboard are not any depiction of s/o, just the aesthetic of the photos

[masterofiodine]

bbc ghosts modern au!!

making up their outfits was really fun (especially kitty and thomas, he would look great in skirt)

[general-dweebous]

I love the idea of meeting the infamous Halsin your friends boast about, and he’s just smitten with you

Everyone always described him as such a flirt- charming, handsome, the whole package so to speak. Granted you underestimated what they meant when describing how giant he truly is. But most of all, you didn’t expect him to be so.. wonderful.

You knew your friends keep good company, so you expected you’d get along, but you didn’t expect to be sitting next to the giant bear of a man enthralled in conversation for hours. Had it truly been hours? It’s easy to make friends, but more of a challenge to find others you truly connect with, and Halsin was checking off all of those boxes.

And of course, his looks and overall stature combined with this personality make it difficult not to swoon over, but at the moment, you’re too elated simply connecting so well with someone else again. Who else would let you ramble about cute critters for 45 minutes straight?

What you weren’t catching on to, however, was that Halsin was absolutely taken with you. His eyes would drink in your features when it was your turn to speak, a smile stuck on his face as he listened to your nonstop train of thought, rambling on about another fascination of yours. Others tend to find these conversations a bit goofy, laughing them off, but you were invested. Even about the silly little things. And he loves it. He truly feels that he could watch and listen to you for hours and he wouldn’t get tired of your company.

The way his cheeks would flush a warm pink when you laugh at a silly nature joke of his.

How he would feel his chest warm as you seem to unknowingly lean in closer to him, letting your knees touch his without moving away.

Let alone the way his heart would beat faster as you take his hand in both of yours, turning his palm to face upwards as you trace lines on his hands, “I’m serious- you have earth hands”

“earth hands?” he’d repeat with a slight chuckle

“well don’t laugh at me!” you’d reply with a taunting smile, “it’s all in the shape; broad, large, square hands. It’s positive, don’t worry. It means you have strong values, or something.”

“Does it? What else does it mean?”

You’d pause, holding his one (large..) hand in both of yours, “Responsible, practical.” you’d say, your thumb almost massaging his palm. “comfortable working with your hands,”

Halsin’s face would flush again, subtly. He’d notice the way yours does, too, which doesn’t help his ever growing infatuation. His eyes are locked on yours, he’d be happy if you held onto his hand forever. He is almost instinctively flirty, following up with “to put it lightly, I suppose.”

There would be a moment of shy silence. You, trying to hide your embarrassed smirk by staring at his palm longer.

Halsin would be the type to forget anyone else is in the room, lifting the palm from your hand to hook a finger under your chin to get you to look up at him. Even sitting down he’s still double your size. His thumb would graze your lower lip as his eyes gaze into yours.

Unfortunately, there are other people in the room, and they ruin the moment.

“Halsin, have you seen- of course.” your mutual friend would say, rolling their eyes with a laugh. “Stop flirting with my ride home!” They’d tease as they grab your arm and pull you away. You know he’d be wanting to chase after you like some silly romantic novel. Another mutual friend from the group would plop down next to him, smacking him on the back with a laugh. “Careful, your eyes are practically turning into hearts.” They’d taunt. “They’re great, right?”

“An understatement.” He’d say with a warm smile, watching you leave, already hoping for the next encounter.

[sweepingboy]

ZHANMADAO IS THE ONLY SPIRITUAL WEAPON WITHOUT A NAME IN TGCF AND I ALWAYS WONDERED WHY MU QING DECIDED TO KEEP IT LIKE THAT.

Like, the cultivation and training meant a lot to him, he always tried to act properly regardless of his status AND YET HE DIDN'T GIVE HIS SABER A NAME??? naming a weapon is a big thing for a cultivator, the sword have spirits, yet he keeps calling it by its type???

NEED YOUR THOUGHT ON THAT

[turtleblogatlast]

Combining the boys’ abilities (and I mean actual combining not just using them at the same time) because I was thinking about it and wow they’re kinda cracked actually-

[ cw: death mention / def not for them though 💀]

Raph & Mikey: infinite clones (aka unbeatable) + strength completely unparalleled + infinite cloned chains + the clones are very fast and can fly + potentially reverse any damage on main shield clones or even damage in general

Mikey & Donnie: constructs that also can last much longer than usual possibly forever + potential future vision + every single cable or wire or anything of that sort has the potential to be taken over akin to Mikey’s chains + full telekinesis

Donnie & Leo: pinpoint portal/teleportation themselves or constructs just by knowing where to aim (aka instadeath for any enemy if used right) + telepathy

Leo & Raph: teleporting clones who can grow or shrink at will (which can also be instadeath like above if used right) + said clones can also act as homing spots to switch places with + potentially swap damage taken to clones

Raph & Donnie: they literally can make Voltron, but more than one + basically impossible to destroy shields + constructs can also be cloned

Mikey & Leo: freezing time and being able to move during it + heat death of the universe + “oops hey it’s other alternate iterations of us???” + this is a time and space team up you’re not winning this-

Basically any combo is an instant “you win.” I wanna go further into these combos later and maybe even add or subtract as I think more on it because there’s so many I left out and I can always extrapolate on and explain these ones more, but this was fun and these boys have terrifying powers even without combining them all together.

Seriously, should each of them train these abilities to the best they can be, there is no beating them even if they’re alone.

[thursdayinspace]

I think when they get married, it's going to be just like this. Private. They will get their piece of paper, say the official vows -- maybe they will even dress up for it. There won't be many people there, if any. It's a formality, the official part. It's a nice formality, there may be a happy tear or two, a gentle kiss; it's a special day, after all.

But the real wedding, that is just them. At home. Nobody else present. They know their own vows, they have all the words in their heads, in their hearts. They go home, change back into their casual clothes and go for a walk. Enjoying the peace and quiet, the comfort of each other's company. And in a patch of sunlight, they'll stop, take each other's hands, look at each other the way they have from the very beginning, and speak their love to each other. For their ears only.

Ever since they met, they have been a unit of two. Even before they were a couple, they'd stand close together to talk, using their bodies to block out the outside world, creating a private universe contained only in the space between them. What they have to say to each other isn't meant for anyone else.

They don't need to shout their love out into the world, they don't need to promise undying loyalty and devotion where other people can hear. What they share is so intensely private, and it always has been.

It's the two of them, hands joined, looking into each other's eyes, and that is all there is. That is all they need. That is all they want. Each other. Nothing else.

[inactiveobeymeblog]

⚠️Rant⚠️

I’m so tired of seeing “dom Lucifer”, “top Lucifer”, and “daddy Dom Lucifer” Is he just not allowed to bottom?

Is he not allowed to feel like an ant under MC? Is he not allowed to grovel at MC’s feet and BEG for them to have their way with him? Is he not allowed to be submissive? Is he not allowed to be at MC’s mercy? Is he not allowed to be dominated? Is he not allowed to scream out MC’s name from pure overstimulation? Is he not allowed to be a slut for MC? Is he not allowed to be a brat for MC? Is he not allowed to be a whore for MC? Is he not allowed to beg for mercy? Is he not allowed to beg?

This man is clearly not just a “dom”. He can bottom, too. Just give him a chance and let him. Maybe he gets too tired and doesn’t want to do all the work for once.

I’m looking at the ones who always write gender neutral MC’s as bottoms. Maybe some people want to see more top gn MC.

Don’t be basic. Consider both sides. Look at your recent posts and think to yourself: Are they inclusive?

Let. This. Man. Bottom. For. Once.

[spirk-trek]

i don't think you understand how much i love pretty!kirk, who is so pretty in fact that when they go on shore leave in the city everyone of every gender and species is just doing double takes because they're drawn to his open pretty smile and glittering eyes and long eyelashes and perfect curl of perfect hair on his forehead, and when he goes into a bar it only takes one second for his drink to be bought and paid for, and he's a little bit oblivious, doesn't even realize how pretty he is, so pretty spock's heart literally stops in his side sometimes even though he's desensitized himself to the USUAL level of ✨pretty✨ after years of practice, but all it takes is jim's hair to be a little wet or for him to laugh a little too hard and it's like this dazzling beam of light that slices through the whole world because he's so pretty

[prof-peach]

So I have this cubone, except he’s???? Missing the skull???? He seems fine behavior wise although I’m no expert, but I don’t know if I should like get him a hat or a helmet or something??

(Ooc but i found him at a convention like this and i needed him so bad my little baldy cubone <3)

So all cubone dont have skulls when they first hatch, again, the common dex suggests they do, this is not the case.

A mating pair have between 1-3 eggs on avarage per clutch, and usually either the last one to hatch and stay with them in their lifetime, OR the eldest that is still present in their lives will inherit the skulls of their parents if possible. This leaves a fair few cubone without one, and is perfectly normal and fine. Theyre more than capable of finding a new one in time, often earned in battle, from vanquished foe, so you see a lot of cubone with unusual skull helmets that dont match up with the dex's limited information.

I've lived with a cubone for years that activley swaps his skull helmet out depending on his mood, so i'd really not worry. You could certianly offer your little dude a cool hat, helmet, or even look into sustainably sourced skulls, people have to buy replacements all the time as they break during battles, or day to day through accidents. If your pokemon is a little bruiser like ours is, i'd also suggest checking in with rangers local to you to see if theres a mass outbreak of one pokemon type, if there is and your pokemon is interested, it could fell a foe and earn its own skull helmet, though this is not for the feint of heart, and can be a bit...full on for trainers.

Health wise not having one will not hurt the pokemon, they may be grouchier when it rains, and could do with some sun protection in the summer, but thats pretty straight forward with or without the helmet. I'd not encourage moves like skull bash or iron head without the missing part however, so perhaps it may come up later on, depending on how old and battle minded your cubone is.

There are options, but its not something you need to stress heavily over.