#Marvel incorrect quotes steve rogers

[mesmerize-the-mayhem]

Steve: Looks like you've been missing a lot of work lately.

Tony: I wouldn't say I've been missing it, Steve.

[fluffycows4life]

@that-punk-from-brooklyn

[hurtspideyparker]

In a timeline where Civil War didn't end in divorce and everyone lives in the compound:

Steve, walking into the living room: Don't worry Buck I think you'll really fit in around here. Everyone is super nice

Peter: Oh my god you're living here too?! Can I please look at your arm? Please please please please please-

Bucky: *turns around and leaves*

-

Clint: So... wanna test if your spider-sense defeats my perfect aim?

Peter: Oh my god do I ever

Tony & Steve: NO.

-

Peter: Hi. Big fan. Y'know we're like a spider duo. Crime fighting spiders. Arachnid pals

Natasha, staring blankly:

Peter: Web friends? SPY-ders?

Natasha:

Peter: Spinneret associates?

Natasha: Leave.

Peter: Yes okay sorry ma'am

-

During a meal:

Bucky: *glaring at Sam*

Sam: Ay Rogers come get your dog

Steve: Bucky, leave it

Bucky: *glares down at soup instead*

-

Peter: Mr. Rogers could you help me with my homework?

Tony: What the hell kid, I'm right here

Bruce: I have... so many degrees

Steve: Hey I know a thing or two myself. Sure Queens, what do you got?

Peter: Great! I'm just gonna ask some questions for my essay. What would you say the role of war propaganda was in your decision to enroll in the military? Was being poor a factor? Actually, how was the Great Depression for you?

Steve: Less depressing than this conversation.

-

Steve: Take a jacket, it's chilly

Wanda: Okay thanks dad

Steve:

Wanda:

Peter: Ha! That's so embarrassing, it's like calling your teacher dad

Wanda: Shut up Peter, you call Tony dad all the time

Peter: Yeah but I do it on purpose so it's not embarrassing. I'm very open about my daddy issues

-

Tony: I wanna punch you in your perfect teeth

Steve:

Tony: Looking at me with your angelic blue eyes, like a freak

Steve:

Tony: Stupid Dorito ass build. Making me wanna take a bite

Steve: I feel harassed but I'm not sure what kind

-

Natasha: Hey bird brain!

Clint and Sam both turn:

Natasha: Hm, that's a problem. You have thirty seconds to decide who gets bird brain. The other will be feather head

Clint and Sam: *start arguing*

Tony: I can't believe they're fighting to be called an insult

Steve: She has that effect on people

Peter: Aw man, I wish the Black Widow gave me a nickname :(

-

Peter: Hey old man

Bucky:

Peter: I'M SO SORRY SIR MR. WILSON MADE ME DO IT PLEASE DONT KILL ME

Sam: *cackling in the background*

Bucky: *stands up and turns to Sam*

Sam: Oh shit- kid you're not getting the money if you're gonna snitch!

Peter: That's okay, I'd like to think my life is worth more than twenty bucks

-

Bucky: I need your... help

Tony: Sure, what's up?

Bucky: *glances back at Steve who stands in the doorway and nods approvingly*

Bucky: Arm.

Tony: Ok... this conversation is killing you isn't it?

Bucky:

Tony: Say please

Bucky: Nope can't do it-

Steve: Do I need to get out the get-along shirt?

*Bucky and Tony share a look of alarm*

Bucky: Please fix my arm

Tony: Yep of course no problem buddy

-

Read Part 2 and Part 3

[literaryavenger]

Steve, seeing Y/N babying Bucky: What happened??

Y/N, putting a bandaid on Bucky’s finger: Bucky got a paper cut.

Steve, rolling his eyes: Seriously? Yesterday Sam was screaming "I've been stabbed!" and all you did was yell "shut up!"

Y/N, after kissing Bucky’s boo-boo: That's because he was screaming "I think I've been stabbed!" Bitch, you're either stabbed or you aren't!

Steve:

Y/N:

Steve:

Natasha, sitting next to them while casually eating cereal: She's right.

[white-wolf-actually]

That boy never minded his own business a day in his goddamn life.

[thewrittenpodcast]

Steve: so. You thought-

Peter: oh my god a live psa demo

Peter: can I video this?

Tony: a live what

Steve:

Steve: oh no

[irondadspiderson4evr]

Avengers on a mission:

Bruce: Well, that went good!

Steve: Yeah, surprisingly.

Rhodey: It’s… too quiet. Now that I think about it, the whole battle was too quiet.

Tony, holding up his hand in the front: where’s the kid.

Pan over to Peter who is playing with puppies he saw halfway to the battle.

[super-marvel-dc]

Steve: For self defense reasons, I'm going to pretend to be a burglar and you guys have to act wisely.

Bucky, Wade, and Y/N: Ok.

Steve: If you don't want to die, give me all your money.

Bucky: Bold of you to assume I have money.

Y/N: Bold of you to assume I don't want to die.

Wade: Bold of you to assume I can die.

[ironshieldchild]

a little something i made lmao

[ironspidersblog]

Peter, overstimulated: MY SPIDER SENSES ARE PISSING ME OFF AND IM GONNA MAKE IT EVERYONES PROBLEM

Tony, trying to figure out how to make the perfect sensory friendly room in five seconds: Pete-

Steve, trying to not say language so hard: young man I-

Bucky, also overstimulated: lol yeah

[incorrectquotesmcu]

Peter: Mr. Rogers, how do I get revenge on my enemies?

Steve: The best revenge is letting go and living your life to the fullest.

Peter: ...

Peter: Ms. Romanoff, how do I—

Natasha: Brick.

[romanoffshouse]

Y/N: Bye Natasha!

Y/N: Bye Tony!

Y/N: Bye Steve!

Y/N: Bye Bucky!

Y/N: Bye Natasha!

Tony: You said 'Bye Natasha' twice.

Y/N: I like Natasha.

[chaxan08]

Steve: I truly believe that water can solve all your problems.

Bruce: Weight loss? Drink water.

Tony: Clear skin? Drink water.

Natasha: Want to get rid of someone? Drown them.

Everyone:

[hurtspideyparker]

Steve: I like you kid, you're gonna do great things

Peter: Thanks! I wanna be just like Mr. Stark when I'm older

Steve: Oh dear god no. No. Where are this child's parents?

Peter: Uh, they're dead-

Steve: IT'S ALREADY BEGUN

[lives-in-midgard]

Steve: Why did you hit Sam?

Bucky: He made y/n cry.

Steve: Y/n always cries!

Y/n: That's not true. [starts crying]

Bucky: Steve what did you do!

[1luna1lovegood1]

Clint: WHY AREN'T THERE ADULT-SIZED PLAYGROUNDS? !

Natasha : so like, everything is the same as a kids' playground but bigger!

Clint : yeah, why don't we have those?!

Steve : they are called theme parks.

Clint: but you have to PAY for theme parks!

Steve: that's the adult part.