#I’m sick and i feel like shit
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She tried to warn us
#jenna marbles#youtube#youtuber#meme#memes#funny#dank memes#random#dank meme#shitpost#old youtube#2012 internet#throwback#adulting#i hate being a grownup#i hate being a grown up#I’m sick and i feel like shit#having to buy my own groceries and bring them inside and make food for myself while I’m sick should be a crime
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perhaps the most important question i’ve ever asked:
does anyone have tips for people trying to stop being chronically late to everything in the world that aren’t weirdly judgmental and aggressive or flat out lies
#when i tell you every single resource i’ve ever found or tried to get through or anyone i’ve ever asked#has been just so. mean about it#not even intentionally#not always at least#but there’s so much inherent shame tied to being late to things or being a person who used to be late to things#that i don’t think people can untie that from their ‘helpful tips’#it’s all ‘i used to also be a lazy uncaring piece of shit! you don’t have to be a horrible wretched loser anymore!’ and it’s like. okay.#you see how that’s not helping. right.#making me feel worse about it is NEVER helpful. i promise you i already have tortured myself over it FARRR more than any ‘on time’ person#ever had#this has been a comic i’ve been stewing on for ages as well but. well there’s of course the shame#idk it’s something that people are always despicably mean about bc fundamentally people who have never struggled with it#see it as a personal choice to be late#and as something one needs to just ‘try harder’ to fix. and that if you don’t#you inherently don’t care about other people’s time or even other people in general#and that feels horrible! it feels really bad!!#i mean i’ve got it from EVERYONE. disability allies. other adhd folks. disability resource offices#it’s something that nobody ever cares to acknowledge or try to accommodate for#bc time blindness and exec dysfunction are NEVER taken seriously as disabilities. they’re always always viewed as a personal failing#and i’m sick and tired of it. bc all this does is make people struggling with this Hate themselves#and worry endlessly that maybe they Are selfish and actually Don’t care about anyone else#there’s a bit too much here to keep in the tags i should really do the comic for adhd awareness month
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ᴀxʟ ʀᴏꜱᴇ - ᴘᴀʀᴀᴅɪꜱᴇ ᴄɪᴛʏ
“𝙸 𝚖𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚋𝚎 𝚕𝚘𝚜𝚒𝚗’ 𝚖𝚢 𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚍.”
“𝙰𝚛𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚋𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚍?”
#it literally feels like I’m losing my mind#I am hoarding so many men inside of my sick head#as long as axl doesn’t beat the shit out of vince he can stay#and (dare I say) continue living rent-free…#my gifs#axl rose#guns n roses#axl gnr
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like five commissions would solve so many of my problems right now …. 🌀you want to commission me🌀…. 🌀you want to look at my pinned post and you want to commission me sooooo bad🌀…….
a few recent commissions ⬇️
been loving leaning into more illustration/poster work and would love to do more!!
#i’m like out of options LOL#like everyone else i’ve been applying to probably hundreds of jobs and like everyone else i can’t get SHIT#my options are 1) stay out here and suffer 2) beg my parents to help me move home and REALLY truly suffer (this one isn’t really an option)#or like 3) go lay in the dirt indefinitely idk i’m in over my head and i made a mistake moving but it’s too late to back out!#going home wouldn’t be good for anyone least of all me!#idk i feel like everyone is judging me for thinking i had it good then falling flat on my face anyways#i feel like it was some kind of sick joke that i finally for once felt stable and happy just to get it yanked away from me#and be worse off than before#sorry i’m really emotional because i’ve been going through it so hard for so long and i’m really exhausted#i hate getting on here and begging for work but idk what else to do right now#mine#arty art
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I just want to remind everyone that Wallace is canonically the worse one to sleep in the same bed with.
Scott can be a bad roommate in every other aspect but GUYS Wallace is the one that canonically snores and kicks in his sleep.
Scott sleeps like a princess with his back against the sheet lying perfectly straight (and also taking all the covers) and Wallace sleeps semi-on-his-side and apparently just fucking punting Scott in the leg every so often (not to mention he talked in his sleep too) and I don’t know why this is important to me but it is.
Because when people draw them cuddling in their sleep it’s always Wallace being normal and Scott turning and snoring and shit but you’re missing out on sleepy-cuddly Wallace turning and snoring on Scott. Let that cringe-fail 25 year old be annoying. Istg.
I’m talking to the Mobillace people too btw. Not that I’ve seen anyone draw them cuddling in bed (which is a CRIME btw. Draw that. For me.) but like imagine how funny it would be: Mobile stays the night for the first time and the hot-weirdo is a bed-menace, snoring and kicking and tossing and turning and suction cupping for warmth and Mobile is like “I want him to be my boyfriend” THATS FUNNY! LIKE-
#scott pilgrim#scott pilgrim vs the world#scollace#scott x wallace#scott pilgrim takes off#wallace wells#mobillace#mobile x wallace#mobile scott pilgrim#I’m sick of the cringe-fail erasure of Wallace#he might be more mature than Scott but that fucker ain’t mature#(however yes generally he is the voice of reason for Scott but anyone can be a voice of reason to Scott. Scott has no internal reasoning /h#I made an analysis post at one point about how I believe the primary reason Wallace manages to do half the shit he does#is because it’s easier to get the motivation to do them if he’s telling off Scott for not doing them#we know DAMN WELL that he is scared of their landlord#considering he got plastered the night before they had to go#(he seems to drink when he’s anxious)#and because of how uncharacteristically timid he was in his office#(and can I mention he said the line ‘it’s not our fault we can’t afford rent’ and like. I don’t know it feels important to point out lol)#but he tells Scott that they *have* to go and there landlord is all bark and no bite#despite being visibly nervous around him#so. the reason he dragged Scott to see him with him is because it would make him feel less nervous to see their landlord#if he focused on dragging Scott to see him instead of his own worries#but I never posted that analysis lol#but all this to say#um#i don’t know#but I’m saying something for sure!
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so like. what the fuck just happened <- me after reading three 500-page books crammed with so much information that you would think there would be some context and answers as to wHAT THE HELL IS EVEN GOING ON THE WHOLE TIME
#so yeah i finished nona#i feel like i’ve gained no information#from the whole series#finishing gideon i was like#yeah this is sick i’m excited to learn more!#and i learned so much more#but it’s DOESN’T ANSWER SHIT#what did i expect honestly#you go in expecting a lesbian necromancer murder mystery#and you come out with both lesbians being at least kind of dead#one of them hasn’t technically kind of appeared for a whole book#neither of them are doing necromancer things#and everything that is happening is a mystery instead of only the murder#hrngh#the locked tomb#nona the ninth#tlt#the locked tomb series#the locked tomb spoilers
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i seriously need more narumi and mina moments because just imagine the relief mina felt when narumi joined, similar age to her and was also considered a prodigy in the force.
to have someone to share the burden of the defence force’s future with must’ve felt so freeing. because before he joined it was just her, age 18, being told that she was going to change kaiju extermination with her exceptional synergy with firearms. and she was so, so scared.
narumi doesn’t have the kind of skills or talent for long range combat like she does, but he’s also a top candidate (despite his behavioural issues- which aren’t much of a hinderance anyway) and mina doesn’t have to carry the burden of the future alone anymore
(although she’d never admit, given she probably views narumi as someone completely shocking i just think it’s so funny how she stood there like O_O when she first saw him)
like i LOVE seeing the contrast. mina who was sent onto the battlefield for the first time and was deathly afraid vs narumi who was sent out and immediately took action because that’s how he always lived (fighting)
and now they’re the top two strongest captains in the force and they will be the ones to lead the new generation..
#egg boils#IM SOOO BONKERS SORRY THEYRE MY FAVES I WANT THME TO HAVE AN IMPACT ON ESCH ORHEF SO FUCKING BAD.#consider this: narumi teaches mina to be less serious. to stop holding onto the burden of others and her team mates and Fight because she#wants to. hold onto ur weapon clench ur teeth because you WANT to be here and protect lives and not because You feel like you have to ashir#and mina teaches him abt team work and yes you can work along but And maybe having to consider ur team members IS burdensome for u but isnt#it nice to have someone watch ur back? for someone to Help you narumi#please please show me how they’ve influenced each other I KNOW DAMN WELL THEY HAVE. I INOW IT. matsumoto please.#i will never be over mina and how genuinely AFRAID she was#ashiro mina my absolute beloved#narumi tells mina to stop being so freaked out all the damn time because you have your team mates don’t you?! always talking my ear off abo#about team work but you can’t even trust your own comrades?!#mina tells narumi that HE keeps acting recklessly because he doesn’t trust his team mates either!!! they’re perfectly capable too#ohhhhh i’m sick im sick i want mina to knock some sense into narumi and vice versa i want them to be the reason they trust their units to#SUCH a degree now. i want them to be the reason why they stand for their men so strongly (narumi immediately pouncing on no.9 when he showe#kikoru isao’s face. mina’s anger and appreciation when her unit stood their ground against no10.#mina#narumi#kaiju no.8#they’re my top two of course i’m making this shit up. i need it so bad bside please please please#i know she grit her teeth and got used to be alone when she subjugates from the roof top but CONSIDER narumi the delinquent but extremely#capable recruit being the one to show her how to live less in fear#i need a tag for them#don’t be stupid#okay that’s it that’s my tag#kn8 spoilers#sorry again. tagging for myself#narumina
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#i have 15 friends on steam who have preordered veilguard i actually feel so sick with disappointment#people have been saying stop preordering games for the last 10+ years jesus christ#those board members love you sooo much. you’ll buy their shit in a box if it has a brand on it you like#i’m so angry. lol
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i actually feel so incredibly uncomfortable and isolated in this space right now and i know that’s silly because of how many people there are just like me who share the same feelings but idk…the fact that people even think this is defensible behavior is making me feel sick
#nothing quite like being reminded how disposable you are#during the pandemic that set the stage for everyone to show exactly how much they don’t care about disabled people#i’m tired of people not taking this shit seriously and i’m incredibly angry about it#because i know y’all who are reckless and ignorant and think you’re invincible are going to be the same ones begging to be let in#when they ultimately become disabled too.#and you know what? i’m not ready to give those people grace yet#been screaming it for years but nobody listens until it’s too late#have already had people with obvious long covid who spouted ableist rhetoric this entire pandemic#come to me asking for advice#and honestly? i don’t think you deserve advice#i have so much empathy but i’m TIRED#i don’t fucking care anymore i get that we’ve been lied to this entire time but if you actually wanted to do the research you would#and since i know nobody cares about protecting others#i think you would at least care about protecting yourself considering how selfish you’ve proven yourselves to be#this is at the entire world and everyone who refuses to wake up to the fact that we are screwed#disabled people have been telling you this entire time and it’s still a fuckimg joke#and it will only become serious when it affects them directly#i’m so angry right now#and honestly? if you feel like this is about you at all? in any way? that’s your sign#do fucking better. TEST WHEN YOURE SIXK#stop fucking going out when you’re sick unless it’s necessary#i’m so so tired
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Waiting for the day when i see an anti-vegan claim that some animals actually want to be farmed and eaten you guys!!!!
#We’re so close#it rly wouldn’t surprise me if someone has already said that#Vegan gunkbaby#I can’t take the anti vegan shit seriously on this site#None of it feels good faith. Ever#Like it all just feels like comfort for carnists. No encouragement to question the belief that has been engrained in you#Like i don’t mind questioning my veganism every now and then. But why do vegans have to be like ‘oh guys I’m not one of those annoying vega#Like carnists never question their beliefs. They never need to reassure the masses#I’m just rambling aimlessly wait#Like im so sick of u guys acting like vegans are oppressing you or something#Like as if the vegan section is bigger than the meat section
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I hate when I'm feeling scared, I hate the me who feels fear.
#depressing shit#spilled ink#words words words#writers#writers on tumblr#dark academia#spilled thoughts#writeblr#poetry#aesthetic#quoteoftheday#i feel like shit#dont hug me im scared#scary#i’m scared#i feel sick#feelings#artists on tumblr
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i think the 6 hours of sleep over the last 3 days is starting to hit bc uhh the guilt is starting to set in
#saw some of the damage where it made landfall SO CLOSE to us and felt sick . and it’s all catching up to me i’m so so tired aksjsjdbf#like if it hadn’t wobbled east then literally everything i know would be damaged or destroyed and then i feel worse because it IS that way#for some people right now. especially after just now recovering from last year’s major hurricane!! like we just keep getting lucky and those#around us are unlucky and it’s such a sickening feeling woughhhhhh#anyway.#i’m just waiting for the fans to cool me off a bit before sleep bc i’m hot as shit even with the breeze and night time#maybe i’ll read a cozy comfort fic before bed . if i don’t fall asleep immediately
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Simon: *being treated with anything less than optimal love, happiness, care, kindness, adoration, protection*
Me: 🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪
@anonfromtheflight: 🪓🪓🪓🪓🪓🪓🪓🪓🪓
#🔪🫱🏼🫲🏽🪓#simon eriksson#simon eriksson defense squad#strife? unhappiness?#helllll nahhhhhhh!!#sick of this shit lol#can the POC kid rest for once#and can the interracial couple be happy for more then five minutes damn#imma need true payoff in S3 bc i’m still annoyed even after that sexy ass speech wille did in s2#(even though that altered my brain chemistry in the best way and i wouldn’t even be here without it but i digress.)#i don’t want simon to forgive his sister unless she does something crazy to get back in his good graces#‘i’m sorry simon 🥺’ still makes me SO MAD like fuck outta here with that bullshit apology#only confessing cause she didn’t want her bed buddy to get his brains blown out#and we all know how i feel about september#jail is too good for him#hope he rots#we’re serving surgeon AND lizzie borden tonight fam!!!!!!!!!!#young royals
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me: i’m gonna make sure i remember to take my meds properly
my doctors office: actually we’re gonna just… not refill that for a while. yeah, you can call all you want. we’ll say we’re working on it and then not do it. enjoy the withdrawals, bitch
#crying#no seriously i’m so mad#i FINALLY started feeling better after remembering to take my meds#and now i’m out of them and my dr is a piece of poo#i’m now on day three of no mood stabilizers:)#i’ll admit tho that between this one and my antidepressant#the withdrawal from the antidepressant is MUCH WORSE#like i get intensely sick when i don’t take it#this one is just making me tingly and on edge and not sleeping well#i can’t focus for the life of me#i just wanna lay in bed :(#fuck the us healthcare system#why you gotta be that way#just give me the pills i’ve been taking for the better part of a DECADE why do we go through this like every three fucking months#it’s just never easy with this shit#sorry about the rambles
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super long big huge tired sigh
#im so sick and tired of people#im so sick and tired of only being talked to / used when it benefits other people#i will always live by the fact that friendships are not transactional but#where is the line#i am not an endlessly supply of energy and support just for you i’m sorry#im just not#im not.#im really not.#you’re not a friend to me when you just hang out or text me when it’s convenient for you#i give my all#all the time#i make an EFFORT even when im going through shit#i communicate#and what tf do you do#what do you give me#when god forbid I#ME#I have to say soemthing. I need to rant or I need to talk abt something personal#where are you when i need help???#nowhere! you’re barely there!#i dont need ur dry one word responses or ur lack of interest showing in ur tone of voice#like atp just tell me outright u dont give a shit about me#please it’s so much easier. cuz then i feel batshit crazy for being enthusiastic n actually wanting to talk to u#and i feel annoying and stupid and like a burden#just be honest n stop wasting my time thank you sm#about to go ballistic swear to god#♡ dear diary…
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Remind me to never live with neurotypical ppl who have never had money issues in their life/have families who are willing to give them however much money they want whenever they ask. Genuinely infuriating ppl to live with who do not consider how their actions affect others ever. How am I on round 2 of this
#TO BE FAIR MY CURRENT ROOMMATE IS NOWHERE NEAR AS INSANE AS FHE LAST ONE#I would never claim that they are and a part of me is like ‘shut up and be grateful you’re not dealing with that anymore’#but then I’m like. well. I feel like I shouldn’t have to be GRATEFUL to be living with someone who doesn’t throw my stuff out without asking#or move ppl in without asking or demand I get rid of my pets#and god…… at first it seemed like me and the new roommate would be relatively fine#never super close we didn’t have much in common but like. I didn’t think their would be a lot of major issues#unfortunately I now want to bang my head against a wall because of shit she does/expects from me all the time now#some of it is definitely petty things but some of it I’m like#????????? HOW do you think you are reasonable for the things you are wanting/positions you’re putting me in?????#sigh…………… post brought to you by my frustration over having to drop several hundred dollars on vet bills#because of some stupid shit they didn’t think through#(MY CATS ARE FINE THEY ARE NOT SICK OR HURT) it is just a stupid situation#I kinda just wanna make a list bitching about all these petty things to get them out somehow#maybe it will help me feel better so I’m not just holding it all in#sigh….. who’s to say#kaz rambles
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