#and it doesn’t even matter
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I would love to understand why my brain and body are desperate to not shower in the safety of my own home but perked up at the offer to go shower at the gym that’s full of people I don’t know and men who could pin me and locker rooms with open doorways and less control over cleanliness than I can get in my own apartment. Something something the years of swim practice and swim meet locker room showers being safe I guess?
#I’ll allow it#I’ll even encourage it if it can help me get over 6 miles walked per day again#but can I please fucking shower? I feel so gross#I have never in my life had as hard a time showering or bathing as I have this year and it’s been killing my self esteem#I feel like everyone knows I’m gross and I KNOW I need to shower#it’s important#and I don’t want my hair greasy or anything#but I go out of my way to avoid it except for an occasional hair wash or body shower when I need to go to an event#and it’s driving me CRAZY#cleanliness is really really next to godliness in my family and also I know everyone in the world views hygiene as a moral issue#and I CAN SHOWER I did it for YEARS I even did it daily for years I used to be SO good at always always doing at least the minimum#even if sleep deprived or sick#but now it’s like I’m stuck SCREAMING and slamming my palms bloody in a containment cell somewhere in the center of my concept of a body#BEGGING to just stop being so gross and to do a daily face routine and use lotion and keep my teeth healthy and keep my hair clean#and it doesn’t even matter#I’m so ashamed all the time#but my brain doesn’t give a shit about it anymore#it views the endless shame as a lesser evil and god I hope I figure out how to get that stopped#I don’t even get triggered in the shower!!! I don’t know what’s wrong! my brain just does everything it can#to keep me from undressing and showering#no matter how much I hate it#and this is so tmi sorry oh god#I’ll probably delete this later#but#shh katie#add to journal#is it the dissociation? is it the adhd? is it the ptsd?#FINALLY my POTS symptoms chill out for the winter and now THIS?
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i’m just gonna come out and say it
if luke comes back in a future book, i hope percy is taller than him now.
#like a good few inches taller#if you can’t relate to this thought process then keep on scrolling#call me toxic#call me petty#call me stupid#i don’t care#i know damn well that height doesn’t matter and doesn’t make one man better than another#it doesn’t represent dominance#percy is the better man because of his bravery and his loyalty and his unwavering goodness#but i’m so loyal to percy that literally anything that gives him any sort of edge over luke gives me satisfaction#LEAVE ME AND MY PETTINESS ALONE#unless you ageee#then please join the club#i swear to gods if even one person calls me toxic or says i’m encouraging double standards i WILL delete this app and im not bluffing#THAT IS NOT WHAT THIS IS ABOUT#YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND#short kings i love you don’t even worry#this is between me and luke#and percy and luke#percy jackson#luke castellan#pjo#percabeth#heroes of olympus#percy jackson and the olympians#annabeth chase#rick riordan#riordanverse#pjo headcanons
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continuing my bones cartoon heart print boxers agenda
#heart print boxers black shirt pjs it all adds up guys.#star trek#star trek tos#leonard mccoy#leonard bones mccoy#doctor mccoy#bones mccoy#proportions are kind of fucked but it doesn’t even matter man the point is heart print boxers so. whatever#what’s in the glass. choose your own adventure
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oh I need my poor little reader girl working as an internet installation technician and being filled with dread when she shows up at her next appointment only for a huge, shirtless masked man to answer the door. Clutching her stupid company owned ipad to her chest and asking in a stuttering voice if he’s the owner of the house, praying that she’s got the wrong address.
#doesn’t even matter if he was on her list or not - he’s letting her in#ceil writing#ghost x reader#ghost/reader
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reminding everyone that the in-universe problem with The Doctor and The Master isn’t “ooo horrible nasty enemies who hate each other and don’t get along and fight all the time but are also in love”
the problem is that they get along. the problem is that they can’t stop themselves from falling naturally into a rhythm of riffing off one another and enjoying the other’s company. THAT is the problem. the problem is that it works and that’s the thing that caused all their issues. they like one another. they just click.
#doctor who#thoschei#the doctor and the master#the master#twissy#they’re also the two worst people on the planet(s) l#lol#it’s the person you can’t help having chemistry with#they almost don’t have a choice#they both know it too#sometimes one of them will pretend it isn’t true but it is it’s the very much mutually understood truth#the problem is they just like one another a lot#not even in a romantic way#even tho it’s romantic lol#they just LIKE one another !!!#what was that thing stephen moffat said#companions bring it up all the time too. it doesn’t make sense why the doctor lets them get away with so much. it frustrates every companio#when they see that the truth of the matter is that the doctor just LIKES the Master#the two kids every teacher sits intentionally far far far away from one another lmao
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People when a character is aromantic or aromantic coded: Wowie! They’re aroACE! Because they aren’t interested in romance! Look at how aroace they are!
People when a character is aroace or aroace coded: Isn’t it cool that this character is asexual? Asexual icon! They’re such great asexual representation :)
#aro#aromantic#ace#asexual#aroace#alloaro#it feels like there’s this weird mindset of#if a character is aro then they MUST be ace too#and if they’re aroace then the ace part is all that matters!#and of course aplatonicism is never even mentioned as a possibility in fandom spaces (even with characters like Saiki who is apl coded af)#hell. even with real life people who have come out as aromantic#if someone comes out as aromantic they’re assumed to be asexual as well#and if someone is openly aroace it’s very common that people emphasize the ace part over the aro part#and while I get that some people do talk more about their asexuality than their aromanticism#it’s still weird to me that like#for example#Yasmin Benoit is one of the most prolific aromantic activists AND one of the most prolific asexual activists#yet I rarely ever see people mention that she’s aromantic or aroace. Everyone always just says “oh she’s asexual” and leaves it at that#her aromantic activism seems to just get ignored even with how much of it she’s done#when trying to find news sources talking about aromanticism for a research project about half of them were interviews#with Yasmin Benoit! she’s done so much work for the aromantic community#yet even in her Wikipedia article which describes her as an “asexual and aromantic activist” in the very first sentence#the section on her activism doesn’t include the words aromantic or aromanticism even ONCE.#like. yeah she does emphasize her asexuality a lot more than her aromanticism. but her aromantic activism should be acknowledged too
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Sukea stuff
Extra: realization
It’s been a while
Panel 1: smile
Comic 2: Caught red handed
you’re his son
Extra: conversation
he just picking on him
Comic 3: You’re grounded.
#naruto#naruto fanart#kakashi hatake#obito uchiha#sakumo hatake#sasuke uchiha#sakura haruno#naruto uzumaki#naruto sukea#fanart#art#my art#sketch#drawing#digital art#I like the idea of sakumo no matter what will always recognized his son#even if kakashi hides everything and it just reaches to a comical point#like he could change his WHOLE appearance and scent and whatever and sakumo takes one glance and goes “that’s my son :D“#where obito doesn’t realize it until WAY later on (it’s like a nagging feeling but he ignores it)#I like to think both gai and obito would share the mindset of “I’ve seen this man somewhere but where???“#Sukea (Kakashi) immediately gets self conscious when near Sakumo#because some people will put it together if they stare long enough at their faces next to each other#team 7 would absolutely go to sakumo to spill the tea on what his son is doing to them#and somewhere in the village Kakashi is feeling impending doom#sakumo ends up just messing with both kakashi and his genin team (though he’ll just lightly reprimand his son)#btw kakashi is not sorry (next training lesson he'll have his petty revenge)
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Minthara says “in Her name” when you first meet her and she’s following the Absolute but when you recruit her and she expresses that she no longer follows any god, but she still has an intact paladin oath, and she says “in your name” occasionally because she’s no longer Lolth’s paladin or the Absolute’s paladin, she’s your paladin
#😭#she might not think you’re a god or whatever but you’re the only one that ever came to save her#and if you let her read your mind you’re the only one she knows has no intention to hurt or use her#like I feel like what Minthara wants most of all is to not have to look over her shoulder or wait for the shoe to drop#like every relationship she’s had as a lolthsworn drow has come with the caveat that everyone will take her out if they have the chance#and if it benefits them even a little#lolth literally encourages this so long as you aren’t obvious about it#and lolth will 100% punish you the second she has an excuse to#and then the absolute like while she was being controlled probably felt more like genuine love than Minthara ever experienced#but it came with Orin and punishments for failing#and her being literallly mind controlled into her#so it’s still violent and threatening even if the extent of that is only realized after she’s pulled out of it#but then there’s you who pulled her out of that#who can clearly and plainly show her that you have no intention of hurting her even if it benefits you#and who went out of your way to rescue her when no one else she was devoted to ever would#and you offered her the means to not only stay safe from the absolute but to get revenge on it#of course it’s ‘in your name’ now you’re the only person that gave Minthara a reason for her to follow you#that wasn’t threats of violence and suffering#you literally gave her the opposite#she’s YOUR paladin it doesn’t matter if aren’t a god#you could be tho#Minthara#minthara baenre#bg3#baldur's gate 3
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I am so sick and tired of seeing all these “I know biden is bad, I know biden has done some bad things but vote for biden because trump will destroy our democracy” posts bc a) clearly our democracy is a sham and b) STOP DEFENDING BIDEN, STOP DOWNPLAYING WHAT HE HAS DONE! you do not need to, nor should you, defend biden to any degree. you can say that we cannot let trump win without that other bullshit. biden is pure evil, he is scum. and part of what makes him so horrendous and disturbing is the charade he puts on like he’s the good guy and trump is the evil, the bad to his good. quite literally the only thing that he has going for him is that his opponent is somehow even worse than him. that his opponent has no pretense of even trying to act like he doesn’t want to fully be a dictator. stop fucking defending biden. stop fucking downplaying all the horrendous, despicable, evil things he has done and is continuing to do. he is fully funding and supporting and enabling a genocide. it helps no one.
and if/when biden loses, he only has himself to blame.
ideally we would all rally behind a third party candidate and the electoral college wouldn’t exist. ideally these wouldn’t be our “choices”. idfk what to do because trump cannot win but how can any of us in good conscience vote for biden’s evil, fascistic, decrepit ass ??
what makes biden so different from or better than trump? nothing!!
- he is unconditionally supporting netanyahu and his genocide of Palestinians
- democrats have done nothing to protect nor help us as roe v. wade was overturned, we still have student loan debt, the cost of living is unaffordable and the minimum wage remains unchanged, biden has increased police presence and funding for police (more so than in 2020, despite the eruption of BLM protests and the murder of George Floyd and his promise to George Floyd’s family that he wouldn’t let his murder become just another number, another hashtag), and so. much. more.
- biden is building off of trump’s policies - specifically and most recently, biden has just announced an executive order to deny asylum requests. the increase in police funding and the further militarization of police was also built off of trump’s policies
the u.s. is an evil sham of a country.
as ethel cain said …
#I think i’ll vote third party. we have no real fucking choices.#we can’t not vote but we also can’t vote for evil genocide joe#but also it’s like#it doesn’t even fucking matter bc it’s all a sham and they’re not even trying to pretend that it’s not#every fucking day they further rub it in our faces that our so-called democracy is a complete and utter sham#one prime example being the violent suppression of peaceful pro-palestine protests#where are the debates? where is any of the bullshit from previous election years??#genocide joe#FREE PALESTINE#CEASEFIRE NOW#END THE OCCUPATION#signal boost#gaza#tw cussing
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Supernatural September - Day 4 | Glitch
Canonically, Dean never said Cas’ name after the fake phone call in 15.19. Canonically, while Bobby said Cas “Helped” revamp Heaven into a Heaven that Dean “deserved,” Cas never showed up. Canonically, Dean left that heaven, which contained his family, to go “find family.”
There is a glitch that is Cas-shaped, and Dean knows it.
#spnsept24#dean Winchester#castiel#spnfanart#Destiel art#spn art#wiggleart#this is a little thingy that speaks to at least my personal flavor of chuck won#where I don’t believe cas was ever in heaven#and the heaven that dean deserved as Bobby puts it#was actually a prison chuck threw dean in with no cas on purpose#bc cas exists outside of chucks narrative#and having those two near each other threatens chucks livelihood#dean never says cas after that phone calls in 1519#and cas never shows up in heaven#‘but misha said’ no doesn’t matter. Misha also to#told me that jimmy was supposed to be at the bar dressed as cas#which makes sense. cas should still be in the empty. there’s no reason why he should be out#and Dean isn’t even in heaven anymore as per the Winchesters#heaven contained his dead family at least and Bobby and supposedly Jack but yet he still leaves#in pursuit of finding his family#there’s just one family member unaccounted for [not counting Sam who just isn’t there uet]
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“If it makes me happy it’s not a sin”
Yes actually it can still be a sin even if it brings you joy because how you feel about something does not determine what sin is.
And sin absolutely can make you feel good or give you temporary happiness. If we didn’t like sin and it didn’t bring us some amount of happiness then we wouldn’t be drawn to it and it wouldn’t be so hard to stay away from.
Not everything that makes you happy honors God and that is how sin is defined.
“But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death.” James 1:14-15
“Choosing rather to be mistreated with the people of God than to enjoy the fleeting pleasures of sin.” Hebrews 11:25
If you want to know if something is a sin the question is not how do you feel about it but how does God feel about it?
#tired of people acting like happiness is the ultimate goal#and as long you’re happy it doesn’t matter what you’re doing#you can still be doing something wrong even if you’re happy with it
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aventurine’s this very interesting combination of incredibly cunning, calculated, & brutal tbh while also having intense self esteem issues. he views every relationship as transactional and has no issue with using people to stay on top. he’s never left survival mode; considering his childhood, maybe he’s always been in it.
‘gilded’ describes him so well. not only is he still in a birdcage with his fancy clothes and riches covering up that he’s still in a place where he can’t escape, he also uses his persona to hide his perceived worthlessness underneath
#liiiike idk how to describe it. he’s brutal and that is directly bc he is a survivor & he still has that mindset of needing to survive#so it doesn’t matter what he does or who he does it to as long as he stays on top & wins in the end#& he carries this mindset even when he’s a stoneheart & on top of it all#hsr#thoughts#aventurine#like. his ruthlessness is very much so a part of him but it is also very much so a survival strategy#he’s just. per se. in different circumstances than where he learned it from
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🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍
#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#sha hualing#mobei jun#shang qinghua#bingqiu#scumbag self saving system#scum villian self saving system#svsss#svsss fanart#myart#soupysundaeart#svsssaction#i finally have the opportunity to rant about my thought process and a few of the details but hey#hi if u saw this first on insta and on twitter#but first of all#those border things are specifically zhuzhi-lang’s snakes cute tongue and all was poking out but it doesnt even matter cause theyre covered#almost all texts were handwritten#the toucan touch was a last minute addition as my friends were somewhat with me halfway through making this drawing#“haha there’s two cans on vc because he’s sharing screen of its progress” and then they send multiple toucan pics on the gc#pelt them with rocks#if you think this formating seems somewhat familiar its because i was inspired by a tgcf magazine#orginally the oval at the top right was supposed to be a portion for sqq’s “reaction” to luo binghe coming 2 years earlier#the number 24? my favorite number. no it doesn’t align with the chapter number luo binghe comes back in the novel#the repetition of “next” was accidental. i repeated next twice at first and i said might as well take it a step further and add another one#then the mourning mourning blah text was just to fill up the space#i am so incredibly smart (never)#this binghe is somewhat smaller than the insta and twit post cause i just realized he kinda bothered me so#sucks cause i spotted the error hours later the art posts and it was too late to repost again#but its ok im fine with it (im not)
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reading batfam fanfics is so funny cause I’ll be giggling kicking my feet at the brothers being actual bros while they go and hold each other in their laps and call each other “baby bird” and it’s like . they wouldn’t fking do that
#and I eat it up EVERY TIME#tell me why this 17 year old boy is sobbing curled up on his 20 year old brother#but they’re cute so it doesn’t even matter 😞♥️#dick Grayson#Tim drake#jason todd#damian wayne#dc
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I think you might have been a father to me, once.
You used to be more than just another man who hurt me in my life.
Reference pic!
#can you imagine coming to terms with the fact that the one who hurt you might have also been a human?#can you imagine even a monster having their good moments? as fleeting as they might have been?#do those moments even matter? they happened- they were real- but they don’t outweight the pain they caused in contrast#DO YOU THINK STANLEY STILL REMEMBERS FILBRICK AS HIS FATHER???#humanizing abusers is such an interesting concept to me#not a fun one- but interesting#it doesn’t rectify or even justify any of the things they’ve done to their victims#it doesn’t change anything at all- it doesn’t necessarily make us feel pity- understanding- or forgiveness towards the abuser#it might even just make us feel worse about them#but it levels the playing field#that despite both victim and abuser being human- the abuser actively chose to act they way they did#no one was forcing them to inflict pain#it was a conscious choice to make another feel less than human- while]st stripping themselves of their humanity at the same time#they chose to be worse than they had to be#they experienced the same joy- pain- love- and hate as the victims. they shared those feeelings and experiences with the victims#they were human#but it doesn’t really change anything#my art#art#gravity falls#gravity falls fanart#filbrick pines#stanley pines#gravity falls stanley#stan pines#artists on tumblr
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im a child of divorce
#the bit is over when i say its over and even when its so joever for these two its not over for me!!! (once again i am on heavy copium)#anyway. thoughts behind the spoiler tags#gempearl#shiny duo#wild life smp#life series spoilers#wild life spoilers#i feel like. i actually was expecting that#no but its so funny the one time the negative consequences of something does actually get acknowledged its the SL finale ��betrayal’/j#like cmon fuck me i guess/j (BIG EMPHASIS. ON THE SLASH J. OKAY.)#but honestly though i did expect Gem to hold a grudge over the 2v1 in SL. and. its good that there are consequences???#it IS a ‘betrayal’ in Gem’s eyes. they were friends. they were murder besties for the last two sessions and then Pearl chose Scar over her#and its awesome man. [through gritted teeth] this is awesome man this will be good for character development ok ok ok. ok?#its also got something to do with Pearl having the red creep in. i think#because during SL Gem was like. nearly idolising the Scarlet Pearl persona while vaguely aware that her own reputation has a similar effect#and yknow. the horrors. the fact that their image is so heavily built on what others deem them to be and they can only play into it#but by the end of SL Gem gets ‘betrayed’ by this persona that she looked up to#and also her own ‘GeminiSlay’ intimidating image is also starting to fall apart. partly of her own will#and now shes watching Pearl slowly turn red again. and this time she knows its not good for her or Pearl#so shes distancing herself from it. shes ‘trying to fix her reputation’. she sees Pearl falling into it again and just. no. i dont love you#you betrayed me last season#but on Pearl’s end of things she’s already deep into the idea that as long as you say you ‘forgive’ someone then everything thats happened#in the past doesn’t matter and they can all be friends. and nooo absolutely no grudges will be held. no emotional repression here#so. because thats happened to her in her own team she thinks the same can happen with her and Gem#and thats so. im going to blow myself up now
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