#I’m just in awe of some anons other blogs get about this

[please-picturemeintheweeds]

tw: abuse discussion, intimate partner violence, grooming discussion, power and control. Trying to be vague here and not fly too close to the muse Sun

Re: red tv and the manuscript discourse, I wonder if people realize that it is actually possible to have abusive/toxic/harmful relationships with people your own age, too? Like even if Taylor and jg were 2 years apart, harm still could’ve occurred….? Like it was obviously not grooming bc that is a very specific set of experiences usually involving a child and a person in a position of trust/power like a parent or teacher or coach etc (I know this bc I lived it!!!). But like… that is not the only kind of harm that can happen to young people???? Her youth/naivety was definitely a factor in how fucked up the situation was but it was not the only element. Power dynamics do not begin and end at age. Adults can fuck each other up, too…

[prometheus2007]

Hey you're seventeen so it's okay but don't spread misinformation that every GoFundMe ask is a bot or scamming you. It's sincerely racist, callous, and cruel. You don't have to reply to these asks, you don't have to donate, but you should NOT be taking pride in blocking these people and you should NOT be discouraging others from donating.

I know you've probably seen some "debunking" posts and you don't want to get taken advantage of, but I sincerely promise you for every genuine scam there are twenty sincere people begging for their humanity. So cut that shit out

Lmao it’s not racist for calling out obvious scams. You can’t just throw a term like that around I have nothing against Palestinian people.

In all seriousness the majority of these are scams, it’s the same format of donation asks and even different accounts for the same person at times. I’m not saying “all of them are scams” but the truth of the matter is it’s better to be safe than sorry, so I advise no one answers them. I have a hard time believing someone in crisis is spamming tumblr asks for money, I’m sorry. Similar format all the time, it just always seems copy paste. Same six people asking me too, they’re evading blocks to spam my asks.

I will take pride in blocking whoever I want from my blog, so do not dictate that for me. Until recently it has been on my pinned post not to ask me about that stuff too, so I don’t feel bad by blocking them. I have seen posts debunking several people on Tumblr alone and I do not want to take any chances nor do I want my mutuals to.

I am not racist, callous, or cruel for my opinion against scammers. I do acknowledge that there could be real campaigns but you never really know. And that sucks, in a perfect world I might have shared them because there would have been no chance of them being scammers but we don’t live in a perfect world. What’s going on over there is awful, yes but it is no one’s obligation to share every post sent to them or every ask about it. I’m really tired of being guilt tripped about it.

yes I’m 17 lol let me make fun of scammers that’s all I get in my inbox if you don’t like me block me and move on have a nice day. I don’t think any of this makes me racist.

if you’re the same person telling me to Kill myself in anon, get your ass off of anon and talk to me face to face.

[the-blue-fairie]

Art by @shes-an-iso – commissioned by me and posted here with permission

Realization.

It is ten years ago and I am watching Frozen.

It is ten years ago and I am watching Elsa transform herself into her truest self, watching her spin threads of blue around herself, seizing power for herself – radical self-actualization.

The glint of Elsa’s ice dress reflects in my eyes as I watch Elsa strut into the sunlight – and I do not have words for why I am so moved.

I do not have words, but the shimmer stays.

It is ten years ago and I am choosing to become a part of the Frozen fandom.

I have lurked in fandom circles before, but never posted a thing, never made an account.

It is my first time being part of an online fan community – and, as awful as fandoms can be at times, this fandom – for me – ten years ago – is truly a community.

I begin to make friends in the Frozen fandom.

Some of these friends are trans.

The gleam of Elsa’s hair in the rose-gold dawn shines again in my eyes, and shyly, I begin asking questions of my friends.

Realization is nothing without the words to process it – and my friends give me words, my friends help me to understand.

I am a trans woman.

It is in this online space that I first take the name Liza for myself, since this online space is the only place that I can allow myself to be.

I build for myself. My blog is my own ice palace. What I cannot sculpt in daily life, I carve within online spaces – offering my writing, my thoughts, my edits, my soul to the world.

Everyone here knows me as Liza.

Even as I’m in the closet to my family for years, in here, I am Liza. My friends know me as I am, and as Liza is all they will ever know me.

But I am in the closet. For years.

(It’s why Do You Want to Build a Snowman still breaks me.)

In the closet more out of some misplaced sense of duty to my family than out of dread, though I am scared. Always scared. And then in the closet because I feel it’s better if I bury this. Not better for me, but for them. If I’m bleeding inside, it doesn’t matter. I can put on a show. I have fine-woven gloves. Well-taught decorum. Be the good girl you always have to be, etc.

(Maybe it’s my fault I’m in the closet for years. Anons on this site have told me that in the past. I don’t have it as bad as others in the closet, I’m just a coward, the fault is mine, the fault is mine…)

Fuck off.

(People blame Elsa for the thirteen years in the same way, placing the blame on her and not the tutelage that trained her, because her parents loved her, you see, and love becomes a convenient means of shifting blame to the victim.)

In June 2016, after the Pulse shooting, I make a post about how I’m never going to come out. I am terrified, heartbroken, mangled by grief – but my friends are there for me. My friends send me messages of support, of compassion.

I still cherish the memory of those.

Years pass. When I finally come out to my father, I can barely say the words, barely look him in the eye.

It is ten years since Frozen and I have come out to my family – far too late. I have been on HRT more than a year now.

(My dad still misgenders me when he thinks I’m out of earshot. He resents when I get frustrated with him over this.)

It is ten years since Frozen and I am Elsa on the North Mountain, staring into the whirlwind of an uncertain future, defiant and scared.

And I know – I know – that I didn’t process I was trans because of the film – it was because of the friendship of fellow trans people, trans people who happened to be Frozen fans a decade ago – but my journey of self-realization, my time in the closet, my creation of a sense of self, are so entwined with memories of Frozen that I can’t help but think of it when thinking about my own transition…

Can’t help but think of Elsa, hips swaying, arms outstretched, flashing, radiant –

Happy tenth anniversary, Frozen.

And thank you. Thank you.

(This is okay to reblog. In fact, please do. It is a sliver of my soul that I offer to the world.)

[stormblessed95]

I’m so sad today, I’ve seen some awful things from solos about Jimin and JK, such homogeneous takes and hatred. How do you cope with seeing things like that? It makes me feel invalidated as a queer person. Seeing someone say Jimin is straight when imo from his art, that’s obviously not the case..

or that from a jkk, if he is with JK he’ll leave him for a women to have a baby he apparently so desperately wants, and bc his society won’t allow that relationship with JK. But as a gay person, seeing that take makes me feel like I’m wrong somehow. 😔

I really can't do anything but empathize. Tell you I fully understand. That I've cried about this exact same thing to some friends on here before too. That sometimes the anons and other blog posts can get to me. And send you hugs and love and tell you to just do your best to roll your eyes at the homophobes. They don't deserve your pain. Easier said than done. I know. Sending you so so much love friend.

[certifiedsexed]

ah, oof — i was the one who sent that ask asking you to elaborate on misandry, and i 100% agree with what you said, i just had never had it explained like that before and found it really useful. thank you for that! but i’m so sorry that it’s led to you getting so much hate, that’s really awful. sending hugs<33

definitely not a requirement (i know this site really hates people with moral ocd sometimes, i’m not letting this be one of those times too), but… maybe, do some of the followers of this blog wanna share something you like about it, or appreciate about it? i think op’s amazing for running it and it’s definitely one of my favourite blogs on this site; i’d love for them to hear these kind of sentiments instead of hate.

i’ll go first: i love the effort you put into sourcing posts; i have post dates enabled and some of your posts go back over a decade. with tumblr’s bad search function, i can’t imagine how much time and care you take to source those, but i love that you do that, since it reintroduces them into the ‘posting ecosystem’ so that more people can read the advice in them:)

Oh, I'm glad it helped! You're welcome. 💚 And that's so kind of you, thank you. I'm not unused to hate online (perks of being Black and many other things lol) but it does get kinda frustrating sometimes, so I appreciate that.

😭😭 Aww, this' so sweet. It is incredibly hard to find the older posts so its actually weirdly nice to know someone notices and appreciates that, ty, Anon. That'll make my week. 💚 💕

(As Anon said, no one has to do the compliment thing, I just really wanted to post this because its so kind of Anon and I really appreciated it and wanted them to know.)

[justalittlerandomartist]

Ask: this is a request you don't have to do if you don't want to, but teen! reader that wants to strike a deal with Lucifer, but with all the work he has, he asks Charlie to go instead. but when she goes there, she realizes that it's just a kid that wants to get away from her awful family. So Charlie helps her and then they get closer like siblings and then when she dies (either due to an accident or by doing it herself) they go to the hotel and there she meets everyone and bc Charlie helped her, she stays and helps out with the hotel by doing things like cooking, cleaning etc. I'm kinda rambling but I hope you get the gist.

-Anon

•Charlie Morningstar x teen! reader

•platonic, no horny

•what if…there was a kid who worked as a butler at the hotel

_______________________________________

You ran. As fast as you could. Your mom was going to send you away. Somewhere far, far away. You couldn’t take it anymore.

You were going to make a deal with Lucifer in order to have a safe space. It was the only way. You couldn’t survive in that house. You had to summon him. The only problem is that when you did summon him….

she showed up.

Charlotte Morningstar, daughter of Lucifer and Lilith. She helped you. She gave you a safe space, a little hole in space time that she could visit you in, and you could access without her. If only you didn’t have to go back to that dreadful home at the end of the day.

Over time, Charlie became like a sister to you. You would celebrate birthdays together, watch movies, laugh, and just be…happy. You cared about Charlie, and she cared about you. She didn’t understand why you would sell your soul, but accepted it nonetheless. But atleast if you didn’t, she wouldn’t have had a cool new younger sister.

but….on your thirteenth birthday, when she showed up with a cake….

“Y/n? Are you there? I brought you a birthday cake.”

Poor sweetheart found your suicide note on the table. She was heartbroken, but knew you would be in heaven. Oh boy, was she wrong.

When you woke up, you were in this really bright place. It was on fire, and it smelled like a bar and dried corpses. But worst of all was the way you looked. You were fluffy, with a bright pink maids dress, white fur, pink hair, a little cotton tail, and…bunny ears. YOU WERE A FREAKING BUNNY KID! That’s worse than being a spider(angel dust slander).

You tried to look at some tv’s, hoping to find a news broadcast that could tell you about this weird afterlife. Instead you saw an ad for a dumb hotel-wait. Is that Charlie? HOLY SHIT, ITS CHARLIE!

You rushed to the Hazbin Hotel as fast as you could, and you were greeted at the door by none other than Charlie herself. She scooped you into a bear hug and showed you to everyone in the hotel.

Once Charlie told you about her mission, you were eager to help. You were too young to do much though, you simply helped clean and cook. You always smiled through the work, just like your mom taught you. A smile was safe. When you smiled, you didn’t get hit.

The hotel is better with you in, you always bring in a bright atmosphere, and you cook the best meals though. Sometimes you miss your friends in the living world, but you wouldn’t want to get your new friends sad, so you kept smiled. Although, someone might see through it.

___________________ Lmao this was so rushed.

I have this and a few other fanfics saved in my drafts on my main blog so they’ll get posted there then reblogged on @thathastagbiotch bc that’s my fanfiction blog so follow that account not this one

I’m so sorry this is so late

[forcedtogrow]

Addressing Pre-T, Pre-transition Anons

I’m getting quite a few asks from pre-T guys about how much you can change your body pre-T, what exercises to do, how to fix body fat redistribution etc. and it has gotten to be a little too much so im making a blanket post regarding this topic. This post is MY VIEWS AND LIMITS. I am not trying to bully anyone, this is a kink blog for fun and I am not a teacher/doctor/counselor/therapist or parent. I am a fun big brother lmao.

1. There’s only so much you can change your body pre-T, and it’s totally dependent on your genetics and dedication to lifting/gaining muscle. Some guys are lucky and can easily pass without T by just working out, I wasn’t one of them but I’ve seen a handful of guys that did that before T. Even then, some of those guys needed T to get rid of an hourglass/pear shape.

2. You can’t spot lose body fat in hips/thighs/ass. You’d need to lose body fat everywhere, but pre-T your body is most likely to hold onto lower body fat because biology wants those fat reserves to make babies. It’s gross and dysphoria inducing but it’s true.

3. It’s worth it to work out pre-T, especially lifting, to create a solid base to work from. If you already have that you’ll grow so fast on T it’ll feel like magic. I won’t lie that it’s frustrating and awful, because I’ve been there and it feels like spinning the pedals on a bike without moving, but it does pay off.

4. Stay balanced with your diet and don’t force yourself into a crazy calorie deficit. It might not be the time to bulk if you feel like your body is reserving most energy as fat (could be your genetics or activity level), but maintaining a baseline that’s Not underweight is a good start.

5. I’m not in a place to tell you to bulk or cut, especially if I don’t know your height/weight/age/activity level. I am not a doctor or dietician and can only say what works for me and people I know.

6. Don’t just focus on one part of the body, do a full push/pull/legs routine at the very least. Like this: https://www.aston.ac.uk/sport/news/tips/fitness-exercise/push-pull-legs or this for a 6 day split: https://www.muscleandstrength.com/workouts/6-day-powerbuilding-split-meal-plan

You need to build full body strength, and more leg muscle can actually masculinize your body and make your hips more boxy.

7. If you can’t transition medically/socially for whatever reason your main focus should be getting out of that situation. This is going to sound harsh but I know many trans people who risked a lot, some trans femme friends that literally risked their lives, and you have to decide what’s important to you. I’m being real because you will only regret waiting—there is no replacement for transition, there is no joy like transition, there is no pain great enough to negate the many many benefits of transition.

I don’t want to get messages like “what if it’s illegal where I live!” That’s not what I’m talking about. It’s sucks, but you either transition or you don’t, and if you don’t that’s up to you, but I cannot assist with that decision. I gave up a lot to transition and waited several years to start hrt for reasons too personal to disclose. I ruined relationships with family among other things, so please do NOT ask me for advice on this because I will not be coddling/sweet. Being a man is hard and messy and a sacrifice.

8. I will tell you what I eat and give general advice of bulking/eating but I will not make a meal plan for you. Every body has different needs that only you and a dietitian can work through, I’m not a licensed professional and don’t want anyone to take what I eat as the only way to eat.

9. If you cannot transition because you are a minor stay off my blog. Sorry!!

[sleepanonymous]

Something im curious about (and you by no means have to answer), have you ever had bad reactions for being In The Know? Ive seen people who also know their identities say theyve received threats from others, and ive seen various things said to people in spaces where identities are talked about calling them bad people or other awful things. If im gonna be honest, I myself feel anxious at times that I might be one of the "bad fans" for the ways i approach the anonymity personally or approach the band in general, but i wont get into all that rn. From what ive seen youre respected here, but im curious

If I’m being 100% honest I created this blog fully expecting to get hate and harassment. I think because I’ve always respected the band’s anonymity publicly, it hasn’t been an issue? Then again I know some people who aren’t even running Sleep Token blogs that have been harassed simply for knowing identities. It's so strange to me because I'm over here with a steady stream of people asking me questions in DMs or just having casual discussions about the guys while the people getting harassed are just trying to stay in their own lanes.

People have talked shit before about a certain fan space I’m a part of, but never about me directly, so it’s easily ignored. Worst in that aspect isn’t even an interaction, but I’m blocked by the Instagram STMeme account somehow. Literally never heard of that account until another person realized they were blocked and then the whole group found out 😂

Funnily enough the worst interactions I’ve had have come from being mistaken for a prominent figure in the identity side of the fandom, including interactions directly with that same person.

Anon, in regards to what you said about being anxious if you're a bad fan or not: as long as you're not publicly revealing identities, telling people who don't want to know, or unjustly getting upset at people who do know but are minding their own business, you're fine. The anxiety alone should be enough to tell you that you aren't one of those people 🖤

For the record I am not Corey, [First Name][LastName]Archive, Sidium, Burning Cathedrals, .under.world., or whatever other usernames they’re using now.

[harrywavycurly]

Not to piggy back on the other anon about grandpa Wayne and Dotty, but nowwww all I’m thinking about is Eddie taking her to the park and all the moms are like, “Awww, dad babysitting today?” or “Giving mom a day off?” and Eddie is just irritated because no. He’s not babysitting. He’s not giving mom “a day off”. He’s taking care of his kid, like everyone else at the park!

Hiii babes!! Piggy back away that’s what this blog is all about 😂 ohhh yes I can see Eddie not having it at all when the Park Moms come and go “awe giving mom some time off? Gotta love babysitting huh?” 🙄🙃

-find all things One Night Stand Eddie here✨

“Okay princess wanna go swing for a little bit?” Eddie asks his not even one year old daughter who is just staring at the world in front of her since she’s currently strapped to his chest in a carrier. Eddie smiles and nods at the other parents at the park as he walks over to the baby swing and begins the process of getting Dotty out of the carrier.

“Oh she is precious.” Eddie turns and looks as a woman approaches them, she’s holding her little girl’s hand and heading for the swing right next to the one Eddie is putting Dotty in. “Giving mom a day off huh?” Eddie raises an eyebrow as he begins to gently push the swing making a little laugh escape Dotty’s lips.

“Excuse me?” He asks as the woman puts her daughter in the swing, she just smiles at him and looks from him to Dotty.

“Just saying it’s nice of you to watch her for a bit while mom gets alone time.” Eddie almost gets smacked in the chest by Dotty’s feet as he glares at the woman standing a few feet from him.

“I’m not watching her for a bit.” He snaps as he gently gives Dotty another push. “She’s my daughter. I took her to the park because she likes to swing and I’m her dad so doing things she likes is kinda my job and no it’s not a part time job it’s a full time one because I’m not a fucking babysitter.” The woman’s eyes go wide as she stops pushing her daughter on the swing, Eddie just turns his attention back to Dotty and gives her a little smile making her laugh. “What? Don’t have anything else to say?” He asks as the woman gets her daughter from the swing and begins walking away. “No wonder your mom hates this park so much.” 😂💖

[billowingangel]

Why are you "new to the harry potter fandom?" Why would you intentionally get into something made by a violent white supremacist terf

Hello Anon,

I would say I did not intentionally get into harry potter. I had read the books as a kid like most other people and to be frank I wasn't a fan of them or her writing. But I began to really attach myself to some of the characters from that god forsaken bookseries. I would daydream of self inserting myself in that world so I could interact with him, I used it as a coping skill.

At times my attachment to said characters returns in a wave. And I've been wanting to write some fanfiction about said characters. I never have before because I was ashamed I liked any characters from harry potter.

But on this Tumblr I've been trying to let go of shame and guilt I feel for liking certain problematic media.

I would like to write some fanfiction, look at some fanart, of characters and ships from harry potter and meet others who also like it.

I know I shouldn't like Harry Potter because JK Rowling is a disgusting and repulsing person but I don't want to surpress this because, personally, that leads to me liking the media even more and obsessing even further. This will pass and the enjoyment I feel for these characters will dwindle until the wave comes again.

I would like to make it crystal clear I do not like JK Rowling. I despise her.

She's an awful horrible person whose comeuppance is coming.

I do not condone or endorse JK Rowling.

I have not read any of her newer books, the cursed child, any of the side books, or anything like that. I know though by talking about Harry Potter that is spreading her proweress even further and I am sorry.

I’m sorry I am doing something fucked up on my fucked up blog. I don't want to like Harry Potter, fuck I don't even like his character, but I do and I don't want to hate myself for that.

I don't want to feel ashamed for like Harry Potter or Hetalia.

If the fact I want to engage in the fandom of Harry Potter makes you uncomfortable-

Please block me

I apologize if any of this sounds like an attack, or that I was being too defensive, for years now I’ve hated and hidden what I like even from myself and its tiring. I am also exhausted so I am longer winded. I have reread this to try and see if it makes any sense but it may not and it is what it is. You may think of me as a horrible person for liking something made by a horrible person and that's ok! You may despise me and that's ok! But please let me just enjoy something.

I am sorry that I made this post about me instead of being about how awful and disgusting Joanna K Rowling and I am sorry. She disgusts me, I looked her up just now so I can spell out her name because she shouldn't be able to hide behind the initials of JK.

Anyway anon I hope this post is a sufficient explanation as to why I was looking for friends who also like this shit from an awful and disgustingly ignorant violent white supremacist transphobic person.

I fear I could keep just going and rambling because I am tired and my words just keep flowing. Please know this too anon, I am sickened by myself for liking this as well.

Edit 1: 10/21 09:40 - I'm sorry for how long this is and how passionate I sound in it, and if I sound all "oh pity me" it's just for years now I've had to hide and suppress the things I like (hetalia and harry potter). I was told liking either (especially hetalia) was problematic and made me an awful person. So I'm a bit sensitive about all this.

[eddiediazismyhusband]

I think part of the problem I have (and this may be an unpopular opinion) is all the hopes and opinions and ideas people (fans) have about the new season. And I don’t just mean things like the “mustache = obvious gay Eddie” that’s happening. But thoughts on Bobby, his and Athena’s living situation, Gerrard as captain, let alone Buck, Eddie, and others.

I know a lot of spec is just for fun, but some people take it quite serious. And I know I’m newer to this fandom but sometimes I read serious takes and go “….but that would never actually happen?! I know many of us don’t trust Tim and the writers but realistically that would never be a storyline on a tv show.…that’s a fanfic.”

So I can’t blame you for your pessimism or want to avoid spec. I hope we don’t get a lot of bts stuff either too, because I feel like fans will be trying to (over)analyze everything to figure things out. Only to likely be disappointed because I don’t trust these writers to write/do anything half as creative, original or logical as fans come up with. Expectation is the enemy and I’m afraid a lot of fans have theirs set too high for this season already

anon i have disgraced you by leaving this burried in the inbox and i feel awful 😭😭

i think fandom in general (and i mean any fandom not just 9-1-1) have this tendency to blur the line between cautious optimism/spec and actually convincing themselves of something happening…

i think a lot of people (and if you are one of these people this is NOT a dig at you) still want to have faith that the writers are actually going somewhere with the story, and they do so by speculating and putting actual thought into what the overarching storyline could be but unfortunately after 6 seasons of waiting, i’m getting tired of the whole thing being dragged out.

it’s no longer a will they/won’t they between the characters for me because multiple times they’ve reached the point where they don’t need anymore of that build; the only will they/won’t they is in terms of the writing team actually going somewhere rather than continuing to bait us

i have no issue with spec/theorizing (i may not wanna see it but i just filter out the spec tags) but my issue lies with some of the more popular buddie blogs having this whole “i can sense that buddie is happening” and then treating people who are validly apprehensive towards getting our hopes up like we’re brainless idiots who don’t know what we’re talking about

even though we literally went through the same thing of buddieblr being like “s7 is our year i can FEEL it there is no way they aren’t going canon”….. just for them to not go canon bc the writers (yet again) changed their minds last minute when they got an early renewal and realized “oh- we don’t actually have to commit anymore, we can just keep baiting snd dragging them along— and they technically can’t call it queerbaiting anymore bc buck’s bi now!”

like everything surrounding this season has been screaming to me (NOT anything from oliver and ryan— ive spoken before about how i think they are where we’re at in terms of being strung along by the writers every season) that we are just being baited again.

and as far as the over-analyzing, i’ve seen so many people saying things like “omg oliver and ryan posting candids/photos and tagging each other buddie is obviously happening”……. as if oliver and ryan aren’t friends…. like i fear the two of them posting eacg other doesn’t really mean much if anything when they’ve done that throughout their friendship.

and just because there are some deranged people on the internet spewing hate about them being friends doesn’t mean that their posting is a sign of anything either other than the fact that they’re probably blocking the lunatics and posting each other anyway…. it’s not some gotcha to anyone in the fandom, it’s not a sign that buddie is coming, it’s two castmates being friends, and doing things that friends do all the time

overall, like i said, i have no problem with people (other than myself) engaging in spec and at this point the people who are getting their hopes up will only have themselves to blame if we’re let down again… my issue mainly lies with some of the bigger blogs being dicks to people raising valid concerns over the new season and not trusting the writers when the writers haven’t done anything to earn that trust; in fact having only done things to the detriment of that trust.

anyway, sorry for the super delayed and super long response, anon 😭😭 i’ve been neglecting my ask box lately in lieu of a spike in temu stans sending me hate yet again but i was just scrolling through and noticed this one and wanted to make a response!

[writteninscarlet]

Hello!

This is long overdue. I’m so sorry about the radio silence. What absolute dead air this blog has been. It was never the intention. Life got busy, then busier, and I don’t think it’s better but I think maybe I’m starting to juggle things. Some stuff has been tough, other things good. I was off around America for three weeks and radio silence with almost everyone - so not just you guys! But I am sorry, I never meant to simply disappear.

I’m struggling and debating over returning. I love Wanda so much and love to write. I really enjoy talking and interacting with all you mutuals (if I have any mutuals left, can’t blame you for leaving). I didn’t think anons could get to me, but they did. It was tough. What they said is one reason why I hesitate about returning. I would LIKE to come back, but I’m not sure how as I wouldn’t presume to jump back in as things were. Perhaps a fresh start, new blog. Maybe come up with a reason here… I’m not sure.

I’m sorry about the absence. I’ve not had discord either. New phone with new number and suddenly I couldn’t get back on, it slipped my mind, and I really can’t get on now! Id love to catch up with people. Id love to talk. I’m not up to date with tumblr. But I’m up to date with Wanda! And Moon Knight (spent far too much on Mk stuff but the loungefly and variants were worth it), and Kitty, and Iron Man and everyone. Or mostly everyone. If anyone wants, I’ll be around on this awful tumblr im system to chat.

I have missed everyone! I am sorry. Things happen? But also it was just tough to come back when I was gone. Anyways… here is a wall of text!

[mazzystar24]

Here's the thing and I'm not saying it's ok, it's obviously not in any way, shape or form, but since I'm assuming you have all the tags of bucktommy filtered perhaps you haven't seen it. Most of the bucktommy blogs (including ones that also ship buddie) have gotten many many hate asks, insulting them, accusing them of something, and just being incredibly disgusting. You literally can't go to the bucktommy tag without finding many posts of buddie fans who tag bucktommy saying shit about the ship, the actors, and the people who ship them. Saying that bucktommy shippers must feel threatened by buddie going canon and that's why they are rude is absolutely crazy (though there might be some that do, who knows?). Now, I'm sure that going to the buddie tag is also hard to do and there must be people who post shit about buddie and I know there are many blogs that are anti the extreme buddie fans. So, what I'm trying to say is that both ships have people that are purposely posting things to make the others mad, that are actively trying to continue this -frankly- stupid ship war. And they are being racist (on both sides, not just bucktommy shippers, I saw a bucktommy blog from a POC person get an ask calling them the n* word) and just plain awful. So, assuming that buddie blogs are better and do nothing wrong is incorrect, and it goes the other way as well. I really don't understand how people can be so mean, and so self-centered over two ships that who even knows what's going to happen? Everyone, absolutely everyone should do better. No one is better than the other one.

Hi anon!

Okay in case you don’t know my blog here is my usual warning that I will be bullet pointing but I promise I’m not trying to be curt/rude (cos you genuinely don’t seem to be on the attack or anything) I just can like explain my thought process better when I can like break it down into chunks 🫡

• I’m assuming you saw either this post which I do end with saying “Like we get it some buddie fans were dicks to you or you disagree or they did something or whatever the fuck but dont start being dicks to an entire fandom???” (Which I feel like it kinda gets the point across of like in general what people shouldn’t do but also it was in the context of me saying that that day there was a surge in the anti buddie fans in the tag, but I also do acknowledge that there will have been buddie fans who have been dicks to them, so I never “assumed that buddie fans are better and never did anything wrong”) Or this one which is just a whole post about why people shouldn’t be misusing tags rather than making people block them and obviously I’m talking in both posts about what I’ve personally seen which is the anti buddie accounts but the principle applies for both and I agree 100% and I did actually make a post earlier than that here where I do talk about both ends and misusing tags as well as not using discourse tags and I talk about both the anti bucktommy/ toxic buddie fans and anti buddie/toxic bucktommy fans so while I understand that you may not have seen that post and out of context it may seem like I only view one side as being better than the other I actually have pointed out before that it’s both and I urge both to just be respectful in fandom spaces, that’s why I even mentioned in the post where I’m complaining about people spamming the buddie tag that I always just politely ask whichever one I see (which again based off what I engage with happens to be the people spamming the buddie tag) but I did make a whole three parter post about how people can improve fandom spaces and how everyone should be doing better

• I actually don’t have the bucktommy tags filtered because as I’ve mentioned before I genuinely don’t dislike them and enjoy seeing their scenes and dynamic they’re just not endgame for me

• okay the racism is a more complicated topic so I do wanna preface this with saying I’m a poc before I have any toxic fans jumping into my inbox calling me a “dumb white bitch” again 😭😭- I don’t know how the racism toward the bucktommy fandom has been -not that any amount of racism is fine obviously like genuinely to those blogs that got shit said I genuinely hope you’re fine- but the toxic bucktommy fans have become a wholeass section of the fandom being racist, which is why I point it out because it’s not one or two incidences but rather an entire subset pushing racist narratives or just posting shit that’s racist u(and again my heart fully goes out to the bucktommy fans who had to deal with people being racist to them I am just personally going based off what I’ve seen and it’s the fact that there are SO MANY racist anti buddie accounts if that makes sense so it’s more widespread in that case)

• as for the comment about toxic bucktommy fans feeling threatened and that’s why there was a rise, i actually didn’t say that but it was pointed out to me by people in my comments and I was like that makes sense and honestly it does because it absolutely tracks that when one side of the fandom is feeling optimistic about something that hints at their ship the other side’s toxic fans will want to put a damper on that, just like I can probably guess that toxic buddie fans probably hounded the bucktommy tag around the time the hospital kiss happened, like it just makes sense

Thanks anon for the ask because I genuinely do agree with most of what you said, and you were respectful with it which I appreciate, but I genuinely urge you in the politest way I can to just check out people’s accounts before sending an ask like this because context is genuinely key and people aren’t gonna be reiterating that it happens on either end when talking about something in the context of one end if that makes sense? And I personally do try to acknowledge it as much as possible even in the posts that I assume you were referring to🫶🫶🫶

[leona-hawthorne]

hi, you don’t have to respond at all (there would be no point because i won’t be using tumblr anymore after today, and i wouldn’t be able to see it anyways, but i also understand if you don’t read this and immediately delete it. either way, i won’t know.)

i just wanted to let you know that it really hurt my feelings when i found out you blocked me on my second blog even though i followed your rules and told you i am in my mid twenties. i wasn’t even following you on my second blog, nor have i ever liked or interacted with your posts on my second one. so to receive another block on my second blog where i hadn’t broken any rules left me completely shocked, hurt and confused, and made me feel completely awful as a fan.

i’m already very anxious and depressed and don’t interact with people very much, so it took a lot to gather the courage and message one of my favorite writers to apologize for any wrongdoing on my part because i hadn’t realized my mistake at the time. i was incredibly nervous and scared and immensely grateful that you cared enough to respond. 

and then for me to be completely understanding, kind, take accountability, follow your rules, accept the consequences of my wrongdoing on my main blog, and wish you a good day and you wish me a good day in return, only for you to go out of your way to block me on my second blog after a really nice conversation, felt like our conversation was fake and it made me feel really shitty and more stupid than i already feel. 

you are absolutely 1000% completely entitled to your choice, and i learned my lesson because it was my fault for not realizing i should be putting my age in my blog description, because im new to tumblr & again, im dumb. 

but i just wanted to let you know that sometimes certain actions can come across as a bit mean, and the way i was treated felt like you were purposely icing me out from being a fan of your blog. 

you’re really a wonderful writer and i enjoyed the stories that i was able to read on your blog in the little time that i spent on here. i wish you the best and happy holidays. 

hi anon,

thank you for taking the time to share your feelings with me. i want to start by saying that i’m genuinely sorry if my actions made you feel hurt or unwelcome. i understand that this situation has been upsetting for you, and i never intended to make you feel that way.

i want to clarify a couple of things. when i initially blocked your second blog, it was not done out of malice, but because i felt it was consistent with the boundaries i’ve set for my own comfort on this platform. my decision there was based on the fact that i wasn’t confident in your age initially, and i felt it was better to err on the side of caution. it wasn’t personal, nor was it intended to make you feel unwelcome or excluded.

after reflecting and discussing the situation, i actually unblocked both of your blogs not even an hour later because i wanted to reach out, apologize for any misunderstanding, and perhaps get to know you better. however, by that point, you had already blocked me back, so i was unable to contact you privately.

i get that this situation hurt you, and it’s okay to feel sad about being blocked—it happens to everyone at some point online. but the way you expressed those feelings came across as a bit much. it’s not fair to expect me to carry the weight of how this affected you, especially when i’ve tried my best to act respectfully and protect my own boundaries.

if you do see this, please know that i would have preferred to handle this privately, but since i can’t contact you any other way, i have no choice but to respond here. if you see this and still wish to continue the conversation, please reach out to me privately and maturely rather than through my inbox.

i understand that you’re new to tumblr and that this has been a learning experience, and i appreciate your willingness to take accountability for the initial misunderstanding. however, it’s also important to recognize that sending such a lengthy message in my inbox—particularly when it seems designed to invoke guilt—is a lot to process emotionally on my end as well. it's overwhelming. i’m a person too, and like you, i try my best to navigate these interactions with kindness and fairness. i can’t always predict how my actions might affect someone emotionally, but i do my best to act in a way that feels right for me.

i’m not perfect, and i don’t always handle every situation right, but this is just tumblr. i’m just one random writer on the internet, and being blocked or unblocked by me shouldn’t have this much power over your happiness or self-worth.

with that said, if you truly are leaving tumblr, i wish you nothing but the best moving forward. i hope you find peace and happiness wherever you choose to spend your time next. happy holidays, and take care.

[pommunist]

Hello!

I've been nervously hovering around your blog as you've always been a level source of info.

As of late it seems as though many people don't seem to quite grasp how different US laws can be for POC. The laws weren't made with us in mind, in fact its extremely common for laws to be thrown at us or twisted against us at all fronts when the other effected party is Anglo.

It's very easy to look at laws and assume the country they preside over would respect them entirely. But for POC that's not the case. This place isn't safe for us. It's corrupt In many ways so it's extremely important for us to be extremely careful with every step. Or we are killed. There is no other way to express the type of danger we face simply for being POC.

I am Mexican, I know that it looks bad that Q has been very silent on many fronts. But speaking even an apology could lead to the entirety of this case being blamed on him. All of it. When the people who caused the damages were on the team and not Q himself. What's worse is that if the people who did cause the damage in the first place are Anglo and have gotten their own Lawyers... they can also be let off the hook from their crimes if Q makes apology statements.

I know its awful.

But even if he contacts those effected personally and apologized personally, there is nothing stopping those individuals from speaking online about his apologies and that being used against him. It would make everyone feel better if he genuinely could apologize without risk of letting those bad actors off the hook. But here in the states it's stacked against those who bend at the knee first. Kindness will get you killed. We as POC cannot exist here safely. We just can't.

Its very easy to look at this whole case from an outside view, especially if you've never faced the American legal system. It's even harder to fathom how a country could have laws so clearly lined and yet disregard them simply based on your race. But it's very common here. I've had relatives lose homes, land, businesses, livelihoods, and lives over the laws out here not being kind to us. All it takes is for one Anglo voice and we are once again reminded how we are nothing. Our hands built these buildings, our sweat is in nearly every structures walls and floors. We clean, we cook, we are still regarded as rabble. Our native tongue isn't even seen as something respectable. It's dirty. It recieves glares and snide remarks.

I digress.

I know you can't quite understand how strong your voice is alone in this. Even now I must hide under this anonymous guise because I can't be Mexican in public. I can't speak my truth... so I am reaching out to you, to perhaps held shed some light on all of this.

Your voice is worth more than mine.

Thank you for all the work that you do. Truly.

Hello anon ! First of all I wanna say I’m sorry that I’ll going to write such a short answer when your ask was long and heartfelt. But as I’m neither Mexican nor from the US I don’t have much to add to what you just said. Though I am aware, at least to a certain extent how bad the xenophobia against mexicans can be over there, and I don’t wish for Quackity or anyone else to suffers the consequences of it.

Also don’t even worry about coming here as an anon, I don’t mind and your safety comes first anyway. My voice isn’t worth any more than yours is, I’m just glad if I can help share your thoughts on this situation.

[venusvity]

DAY ONE OF THE TWELVE DAYS OF VENUS CHALLENGE ; what happened to the plot?

So excited to start this challenge! Over the years Venus has had many, and I mean many, plots and rewrites so I decided to compile all the ones I can remember for day one of this challenge. I've probably forgotten some because I have the memory of a fish but if you want to refresh my memory there is also an ASK GAME going on for the challenge where you can bring up old Venus plots you loved/remembered. Here's to five years! TW // MENTIONS OF DRUG ADDICTION, DEPRESSION, CHEATING, SEXISM, TOXIC/ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIPS, AND SUICIDE.

TRANSCRIPTION.

Venus at their conception was literally just Baebi and friends. Like, if you think my Yoonah favoritism is bad NOW you should’ve been there for 2019. Truly, I didn’t give a damn about any of the other girls until a little while later when I wanted to project my love for Johnny Suh onto an OC because I was tired of writing in 2nd person lol! The original line up consisted of Baebi, Jaeyeon, Aki, Chloe and Jiah which is probably why I have such an attachment to what I deem “The Big Three”. Baebi, Chloe, and Jiah (now Sena congrats bby) are the only Venus girls I’ve ever really been able to consistently write for which is why they, typically, stick around unlike the rotating fifth slot. Anyways, plots.

The main plot at the time was cenetered around Yoonah and her battle with depression, making her a not great person. At that time, no one had really had a devisive character like that before and I’m only saying that because the amount of anons I would get telling me Yoonah is a bad person and they don’t know why I would write someone like her (she’s so tame by today’s comparison lol) told me that. The community was pretty small, max 12 people at the time so I don’t blame them for being thrown off by this version of Yoonah. She was a lot lol.

Anyways, her love interest at the time was Bang Chan and they had this awful and toxic relationship where she would emotionally and verbally abuse him due to her not being abloe to cope with her depression properly. Truly, this was mainly what the Venus blog was about for a while. Yoonah cheating on Chan, Chan trying to help her, them getting back together, them breaking up, wash and repeat. It was fun to write but I needed to branch out more I don��t remember when I retired this plot if I’m being honest? I just remember it not being a thing anymore expect in fun little easter eggs like Yoonah’s English name being Evie. Chan picked that for her. I think it’s a sweet call back lol!

This was like the main thing about Venus I remember at the time besides the Chloe and Jiah plots but that’s on the next page!

TRANSCRIPTION.

Then there was the Chloe and Jiah plots. I do believe these bleed into 2020, I’m not sure as you’ve noticed I suck with dates lol, but these were impactrful as well. Actually, massively impactful! Especially the Chloe plot which ended up evolving into what is now known as the Chloe and Nakyung situation of 2020(?). We will touch on that later lol.

Let’s start with the star of the show: Chloe. Chloe’s plot was about her insecurities in her looks and relationship. Her relationship with Johnny was very ideal; He loved her, he treated her right, and they had been together for years at that point. Still, in every version of the Johnny Saga, he’d cheat. Always. Which would always fuck with Chloe’s low selfesteem more. Anyways, the plot.

Let’s get it out of the way now: OG Chloe is not the bitch we know today. She was very different. She had no confidence, was weak and naive through and through, and couldn’t stand up for herself. Which is why this plot went down the way it did. Johnny and Chloe were together for 6 years before he started to grow tired of constantly reassuring Chloe he loved her and she was the only girl for him. In comes a girl named Kimi. Kimi was in a now defunct group of mine called Colorcoded andw as originally in the Venus lineup before she left due to bullying by their former leader, Jaeyeon. Long story, send an ask if you wanna know lol!

Anyways, Johnny would go on to cheat on Chloe with Kimi and Chloe only found out about this through DISPATCH…Yeah, insanity. She ended up staying with Johnny because he was all she knew and felt no man would ever love her and it was so pathetic and sad to watch like omg girl get up. Anyways, despite trying to fix their relationship, Chloe could not get over him cheating and would go onto cheat on Johnny with Kun. Crazy NCT love triangle I know. Because of this, they would have a fight and FINALLY part ways. This plot was reworked a few times before completely being tossed because some people were… sexist about it? Weird times. Wouldn’t revisit!

TRANSCRIPTION.

Actually, everyone minus Chanbin in the original Jiah plot has been canceled so…i’m not gonna go there lol sorry!

TRANSCRIPTION.

I really only remember Yoonah’s plots and the Chloe and Nakyung thing happening in 2021…Let’s start with Yoonah since I like talking about her more lol! In 2021, Yoonah’s depression had sunken her to the point of a suicide attempt that was very publicly broadcasted. She was in and out of recovery for a hot minute because that was her whole plot. Her point as a character was to show that recover is never linear. Once Yoonah would reenter public life after her attempt, she would begin her never ending battle with addiction. Her drug addiction was a big focal point of her character at the time since it was literally ruining everything around her. Her job, her relationships, her body, she was killing herself in every chapter basically, and by the time she decided to try and get clean she had nearly lost everything she loved.

I remember she was in a very deep love affair with Jaehyun that would fizzle out once she decided to get clean. I did love them together despite them not being the best for one another…I don’t know, there was just a lot of love between them. Around this time was also when I started develving into Yoonah and Jinhwa’s problematic relationship but I feel that got more developed in 2022. In this timeline, Jinhwa had met Yoonah when she was an adult. Their relationship was still not appropriate but it was a lot more acceptable than it is now. The power imbalance though, had always been there and I do find that a bit devestating. Even if he wasn’t a creep, he was still cruel to her. But, Jinhwa was always a creep, just not to Yoonah which is why I think it often went overlooked.

Anyways, this was pretty formative year for Yoonah since this is really where she began to spiral and her lore started to solidify. Cannot tell you what Jiah and Aki were up to. I think Aki was dating Jennie or Sana? And, honestly, Jiah might not have even been in Venus…IDK weird year.

TRANSCIPTION.

This was the year I made the fatal decision of the Nakyung, Johnny, and Chloe love triangle. If you can’t tell, I don’t like this plot point lol. I don’t think I don’t like it as a plot but I hated the response I got. A lot of people used this plot to push outdated and misogynist opinions onto Chloe and Nakyung, mainly Nakyung, and I could not stand it. It felt like I made like I had made a moster I could not get away from which, truly, is why I removed Nakyung from the lineup this year. Even then, no one would shut up about this plot and it drove me insane lol!

Anyways, this plot was about Nakyung fucking Johnny, Chloe’s boyfriend, while Chloe was asleep in the next room. Sure, it was messy and fun until it wasn’t but that was really the only thing it gave. I guess this birthed the version of Chloe we know today but at what cost? Chloe would begin to bully Nakyung due to the affair, she was literally valid for that idk why everyone was taking Nakyung’s side, and would eventually get her removed from the lineup.

This plot has been revised to not make me go crazy and so no one can ever compare my girls to Cassie of Euphoria ever again.

Y'all I cannot remember anything that happened this year. It was a weird year for Venus and for me personally so I've wiped it and much of early 2023 from my memory lol. Just know, a majority of what occurred here is no longer canon and I'm sorry you had to see that.

Happy five years! Here's to five-hundred more! 💗