#I was just thinking about this again lmao
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It's funny how opinions can change over time for instance I used to want Bruce to be a good parent but then I realised how fucking boring that is to read at the end of the day comics are soap operas and I'm here for the drama
#dc#dc comics#batman#bruce wayne#character development <- for me not for bruce#give that bitch some regression#but yeah i think there is a fine line with bruce and his parenting#like imo he should be trying his best but failing spectacularly at it#all his actions should come from his own fucked up sense of duty#anyway i think ive mentioned this before#but someone just liked one of my really old posts#talking about good parent bruce and how hes important yada yada yada#and reading it made me go#i dont agree with this bitch she does not speak for me >:(#so setting the record straight#.... until i change my mind again lmao
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ring my bell — ljh
♡ pairing: neighbor!jihoon x afab!reader ♡ theme: smut [18+ mdni] ♡ wc: 7k ♡ warnings: sub!reader, but also subby!jihoon, size kink, praise kink, auralism/ecouteurism, masturbation (m. & f.), oral (m. & f. receiving), unprotected piv sex (do not do this), cum swallowing, creampie, cockwarming, dacryphilia, size kink, hair pulling, gagging, missionary, 69, nipple play/boob worship, multiple orgasms, sex toys, mild alcohol consumption, did i mention size kink, lil fluff at the end ♡ a/n: i abandoned this fic at least five times lmao but then one night at like 2am the brain rot took over and here we are! tysm to @wonwovy for beta reading, @shinysobi for the title suggestion, and @miniseokminnies for help w the photos <3
When you moved into your new condo, you were pretty sure you hit the jackpot. At first, you were a bit suspicious - how could the rent be so low in this part of town, with such a nice building? But for two months after you moved in, you’ve had no problems. Sure, the shower head is a bit leaky sometimes, and you could use a bit more storage space, but overall - no complaints. As an added bonus the unit next to you was vacant - aka, peace and quiet. Perfection.
That vacancy didn't last forever, though. Two months in, and you found yourself with a new neighbor. You haven't had a chance to properly introduce yourself to him yet, but from the brief glimpses of him you've gotten he seems nice. You suspect he's around your age, a bit quiet, definitely keeps to himself but has been very polite in passing. And while he's not exactly your type, you do admit he is pretty cute. So, nothing wrong with him.
You did, however, quickly discover two major problems. One, it turns out the walls are paper fucking thin. And two - to make matters worse - his bedroom is apparently right on the other side of yours, sharing a wall. And you can hear everything.
By the sounds of it, the guy is single. You never hear any other voices, just his - soft moans emanating through the sad excuse for a wall, gradually getting louder, culminating in a symphony of unholy noises. You've never heard a man be so… vocal before.
At first, you just try to ignore it. Obviously, he's doing nothing wrong - this is simply a consequence of shared living spaces. So you do your best to mind your business.
Easier said than done.
A week passes. You still haven't had a chance to actually say hi to your new neighbor, but you already feel like you've become intimately acquainted with him. It feels a bit… wrong. This is very clearly a one-sided situation. You don't even know the guy’s name for fuck’s sake. Yet, each time, a sharp aching sensation forms a pit in your stomach. You find yourself fantasizing about him - wishing you could be on the other side of the wall, wishing you were the one responsible for the sounds being produced.
You've gone and fallen for a complete stranger - or at least, the idea of him. Fucking great.
You just need to actually meet him, you tell yourself. He could be a complete asshole. Or maybe just not your type at all. Once you say hi, you'll get over this silly little fantasy in no time.
I’ll make sure to run into him tomorrow, you determine. You go to bed, content with your plan.
Not five minutes after you crawl under the covers, you start to hear faint groans.
You reach for your airpods, but they're not on your nightstand. You must have left them in the other room.
It’s fine, you decide. It’ll be over soon enough.
But tonight, apparently, he is taking his sweet time.
You stuff your head under the pillows, trying to drown out the sensual sounds, but the moaning persists. Even muffled it’s loud - and it only gets worse as the minutes pass.
Just when you think he’s about to finish, the sounds cease. Thank god, you think as you roll over, ready to finally get some sleep.
But a minute later he starts up again. Slowly at first, once again taking his time, increasing his speed at an excruciatingly slow pace. Eventually his breaths grow shorter, his groaning louder. Then, he stops.
As if he set out to torment you tonight, he begins once more.
You lay there, eyes closed, unmoving, breathing deeply, trying to ignore the aching between your legs. But it's impossible.
The third time around, he's clearly very on edge. His moans turn loud, whiny, pathetic. It's probably the hottest thing you've ever heard.
Don’t do it don't do it don't do it…
As if your arm has gained a mind of its own, your hand slides beneath the fabric of your underwear. You gasp as your fingers slip between your folds - you're fucking wet.
Your already-throbbing bud pulsates between your fingers. Slowly, you begin to rub your clit. The sensation is immediately overwhelming; the uninhibited cries of pleasure emanating from the other side of the wall are enough to send you over the edge. Just when you think you can't take another moment of this, he cums. And so do you.
Your free hand clasps over your mouth just in time. You try as hard as you possibly can to stay silent - but you want to scream. You writhe against the sheets to the sound of his release, riding out your orgasm on your fingertips. Muffled cries escape despite your efforts - but are lost amidst the man’s sea of moans. You cum long and hard, savoring every last moment of your high.
As you start to come down, you sink into your mattress, body spent, mind drifting off. Your neighbor seems to have exhausted himself too - the only sounds carrying through the wall now being that of deep breaths.
So much for running into him tomorrow.
You flop over onto your side, shoving the thought away - but you know even if you try, you can't avoid him forever.
You just pray to god he didn't hear you.
Of course, after a week without any encounters, you manage to run into him the very next day.
Upon returning from the grocery store, you head to your building’s elevator. The doors are closing as you approach, so you figure you'll just take the next one - but the occupant holds the door for you.
“Thank you,” you say cheerfully, but as you step inside your stomach drops. You are face to face with your new neighbor.
“You’re welcome,” he replies, making direct eye contact with you. You want to disappear into the walls, but you maintain your composure. The button for your floor is already lit up, so he presses the close door button.
“I believe I just moved into the unit next to yours,” he says as you set your heavy bags on the floor. “I've seen you around but haven't had a chance to introduce myself. I’m Jihoon.”
He extends his hand out to you. You instantly regret setting your bags down.
You smile calmly, hoping he doesn't notice how flustered you are. But as you slide your hand into his, your heart rate rises. It doesn't help that he has really nice hands - large, warm, with fingers long and graceful, and a nice strong grip against your own hand. Your mind flashes back to the events of last night, picturing what those hands were doing…
Stop it.
“I’m y/n,” you reply with a smile, trying to be as normal as possible. “Nice to meet you.”
You withdraw your hand from his grasp as he lets go - nonchalantly, but with haste. Any longer and your palms would have probably started sweating.
“So, how are you liking it here so far?” you ask casually.
“So far so good,” he replies. “I'm honestly surprised that I was able to find anything in this part of town for such a good deal. Nice and quiet here too.”
Quiet.
You fear your suspicions are correct: he has no idea he's been putting on a nightly show for you.
The elevator gives a soft ding as it comes to a stop. You reach down to grab your bags as the door opens.
“Can I help you with that?”
“Oh, uh… sure.”
He picks up the heavy bags with ease. You could tell that he’s a muscular guy, but up close he looks straight up beefy. It doesn't help that the tight shirt he's wearing hugs all his muscles perfectly, his biceps nearly bursting out of his sleeves. You force yourself to look away before you start fucking drooling.
He delivers the bags to your front door. He returns them to you with care, making sure you have a firm grip on the handles before letting go. His hand lingers upon yours momentarily - the lightest brush of his fingertips against yours enough for your insides to do a somersault.
“Thanks again,” you tell him, making the mistake of direct eye contact again.
“Of course,” Jihoon replies warmly. “See you around.”
You flash him a smile, perhaps a bit too enthusiastically. “Bye!!” you blurt abruptly as you unlock your front door, hurrying inside. You want to turn around, get one more good look at him - but you shut the door behind you.
Your head spins as you put your groceries away. You're so wrapped up in your imagination that you nearly put the milk in the cabinet. But you can't stop daydreaming about what those muscles look like underneath his shirt.
You finish up and head into your bedroom. A nice hot shower should clear your mind. Not two seconds after taking off your shirt, you freeze. The familiar sounds from next door have begun yet again.
You stand there, half horrified, half horny. Surely it's nothing more than coincidence that your neighbor got home and started jacking off minutes after having a conversation with you. He was probably gonna do that anyway, you try to convince yourself. You're just having main character syndrome right now, this has nothing to do with you.
But your gut is telling you otherwise.
Mindlessly your fingers drift to your bra clasp, removing the garment. Taking your breast in one hand you stroke your thumb over your nipple, already hard from sudden exposure to the cool air of your room. You let yourself stand there for a minute, listening to Jihoon’s soft moans, imagining you could see him through the wall, slowly stroking his cock in his hands.
You feel guilty, ashamed, but the aching in your cunt overpowers any sense of remorse. Your hand makes its way into your pants, your fingers gliding through your folds, slipping easily into your soaked pussy. You wince silently, stifling the moans desperately trying to escape you. Slowly, you begin to fuck yourself. You can't help but think about how it would feel if it were Jihoon’s fingers inside you instead.
You stand there for a couple minutes, your clit throbbing against the motion of your palm - threatening to make you scream and cum.
You can't let him hear you, you keep telling yourself. But part of you almost wants him to hear you. You picture him getting so turned on hearing your cries of pleasure that he cums instantly, all over himself, making a huge mess that you would love nothing more than to help clean up.
You feel your climax rapidly approaching. You cease moving your fingers, but let them remain resting inside you. You try to calm yourself down, taking deep breaths to slow your pounding heart, but just as your head starts to clear you hear a sudden swell of orgasmic sounds from through the wall. As if by reflex your hand moves again. Your body tremors at the pressure against your overstimulated clit - you cum in silence, forcing your cries back inside you as . You ride out your high, and so does Jihoon, his moans slowly softening as he comes back down.
Heart pounding, you slowly remove your fingers from your cunt. Your hand is soaked; you find yourself wishing it was Jihoon's face instead, glistening with your juices after eating you out, making you cum an unreasonable amount of times.
You sigh. You know this should all feel wrong. But why does it feel so good then?
A strange combination of feelings overtake your body: tingling bliss from your orgasm, guilt from the reason for your orgasm, an overpowering yearning for the touch of essentially an entire stranger.
You strip the remainder of your clothes off and proceed to take a very long, very hot shower.
You wake up the next morning stupidly horny.
It didn’t help that you had a dream about Jihoon. In it, you were standing in his bedroom, watching him masturbate to the sight of you. His cries echoing through your subconscious, the pathetic look on this face as he came all over himself - it’s not surprising you woke up to a puddle between your legs.
You pause, listening to see if you can hear your neighbor next door, but you hear nothing. You reach into your nightstand, pulling out your favorite vibrator. The purple device rumbles in your hand as you turn it on. For a vibrator, it’s pretty quiet, but with your stupid thin walls you know it would be perfectly audible from the other side. You think Jihoon isn’t around - surely you would hear him if he were - but even if he is, you truly don’t even care anymore. You position the toy lightly upon your clit - even through the fabric of your underwear, its powerful vibrations instantly feel amazing. A soft groan escapes your lips before you can stop it. Your hips begin to move lightly at the stimulation - the pressure of the vibrator’s end causing your wetness to stick to your panties. You attempt to restrain your moaning, but before long you cease resisting. It feels too good. Your orgasm quickly builds in your gut, making you whimper as you squirm against your pillow, its intensity growing and growing until - you cum. The fire of your release burns through your body, your cries filling the air without abandon. Deep breaths fill your lungs as you come down, soft gasps emanating from your lips as you turn the toy off and toss it aside.
A series of thunks echo from through the wall, followed by a hushed “shit”.
It sounds like somebody dropping a phone or something, but whatever it is - turns out your neighbor was home after all. Whoops.
In your post-orgasm bliss you begin to drift back to sleep. You don’t know what you’re going to do now next time you run into Jihoon, but that’s a problem for later.
You end up sleeping in far too late. By the time you wake up, you feel groggy and sluggish, so you figure going to the gym will help you feel a little better. You don a soft pink pair of leggings and a light gray sports bra, filling your water bottle and grabbing your airpods on your way out the door. You wait in the hallway for the elevator. It reaches your floor with a ding, its doors sliding open to reveal who other than your next door neighbor.
Of fucking course.
He appears to be returning from the gym, his tight white t-shirt clinging to his body in a way that practically puts all his muscles on display. His dark hair is damp and sweaty, messy, stray strands of it sticking to his forehead. He looks up to see you standing there, a panicked look instantly filling his eyes. His skin is already flush from exercising, but his ears turn practically crimson at the sight of you.
“Hi,” you say with a friendly smile.
He freezes, staring at you like a deer caught in the headlights. He quickly tries to shake it off.
“Oh, uh, hey,” he mumbles in an attempted nonchalant tone, but already his cheeks are becoming more flustered. You see his eyes flicker up and down your body - your outfit isn’t terribly revealing, but it’s certainly on the sexier side of athleticwear. He stands there, awkwardly frozen - so long that the elevator door begins to shut again. He grabs hold of it, triggering the motion sensor so it reopens. He starts to shuffle past you, but you decide you’re feeling bold enough to try and engage him in a conversation.
“Just coming back from the gym?” you ask casually.
He stops in the hallway, standing right before you.
“Oh, yeah.”
“Do you also go to the one over on Clark Street?” you question. You won’t hold him up too long - he looks like he wants to perish - but you figure you’ll torment him for another minute or so. “That’s where I’m headed now.”
“Yeah, I do,” he answers, subtly shifting his gym bag in front of his body.
“Cool! Maybe we’ll see each other there sometime,” you tell him in a chipper tone.
“Maybe, yeah. That’d be cool,” he replies, smiling nervously.
You enter the elevator and press the ground floor button.
“Well, see ya around!” you tell him with a wave.
“You too,” he responds, not taking his eyes off you until the elevator door shuts closed.
Three days pass - three days of pure silence from the other side of the wall.
Now that Jihoon has discovered the truth, he's clearly mortified. You catch a few glimpses of him around the building, but the man practically vanishes at the sight of you. You feel a little bit bad, but you know the ruse could not have lasted forever anyway.
Unless he somehow knows exactly when you're not home and has been jacking off exclusively then, you haven't heard him pull his dick out at all. And judging by the couple times you've seen him, the man has been incredibly on edge.
You return home a bit late in the evening after hanging out with some friends. You’ve had a fair bit of wine, so you're feeling a little tipsy, but you're in a pleasantly good mood. You're also decently horny; your mind drifts to your neighbor, conjuring up the image of him returning from the gym, sweaty, muscular, his t-shirt damp and tightly fitted against his sculpted body.
Not two minutes pass after you step inside before you hear the SLAM of a door from the hallway. Footsteps approach your unit, followed by frantic knocking on your front door.
You scurry over to the entrance, reaching out to unlock the door, but the pit in your stomach makes you pause. What if he’s mad at you? you start to worry.
Well, only one way to find out.
With the click the deadbolt turns. You swing the door open to reveal Jihoon, in a plain white t-shirt and grey fucking sweatpants.
He stares at you, standing frozen in your doorway. You can see the gears turning in his head, trying to calculate if this is all a mistake.
After just enough moments of silence for it to be awkward, he clears his throat.
“Hi, um… May I come in?”
He looks incredibly tense, but the way he's staring at you with such intensity makes your pussy ache.
“Sure.”
You step aside, gesturing for him to come in.
He enters. He takes a look around as you shut the door behind him.
“It's really nice in here,” he comments, attempting to make small talk.
“Oh, thank you,” you say with a friendly smile. He looks even more nervous now that he's in your apartment. He pauses, nonchalantly observing some of the artwork on your wall, seemingly trying (and failing) to come up with a good segue into whatever he came over here to say.
“So, um…” he starts, rubbing his hands together anxiously.
“I just wanted to… uh… well, I figured I should probably let you know…”
You inch even closer to him as he stumbles over his words; his shoulders tense slightly. He runs one hand through his hair, avoiding your gaze.
“I guess I just wanted to apologize,” he finally is able to articulate. “I just recently realized that the walls in this building are pretty thin and uh… well I guess I don’t know if I've been loud at all…”
Blushed redness creeps up his neck as his terrible lying resonates through the room.
Maybe it's the way he's standing there, doing nothing but stumbling over his words yet looking incredibly sexy, or maybe it's the wine - but you're feeling bold today.
“Yeah, you have been.”
The pale color of his cheeks suddenly goes even paler, turning his entire face sheet-white as he stands there, horrified. Then, the redness returns with a vengeance. He looks like a very hot, very nervous tomato.
“I’m so sorry,” he stammers, “I really had no idea-”
“Why are you apologizing?”
He stares at you, confused.
“Um…”
He waits for you to clarify, but you don't. Seeing him this flustered up close and personal has your panties soaked already, and you want to revel in it.
He lets out a deep sigh.
“I just… I know I can be loud sometimes, but from now on I’ll be more conscientious of my… volume. And I just don't want you to think I’m perverted or anything…”
He shakes his head, realizing he's just digging himself a deeper hole at this point.
“Anyway, I’m really sorry to bother you, I should get going-”
He tries to slip past you, but you throw your arm out in front of him, slamming your palm into the wall of the narrow hallway as you block him from exiting. He freezes, involuntarily holding his breath as panic spreads across his face.
“What if I like it?”
Your arm brushes against his torso, his chest heaving into you with his quickening breaths.
“What?” he asks, barely more than a whisper, clearly taken aback by your question.
“What if I like hearing you?”
His eyes widen. You step even closer into his personal space, your face now mere inches from his.
“What if I want to hear you making those noises on this side of the wall, in my bed?”
You grasp onto his t-shirt, yanking his body into yours. He lets out a gasp as your tits press into his chest - his mouth is now so close to yours that you feel the exhale against your lips.
“Would you like that?”
He gazes at you, his eyes darkening with desire. Then - he kisses you.
It's not a delicate kiss, nor is it sweet. He kisses you as if he intends to devour you, hungrily tugging at your lips as he grasps at your waist fervorously, aching to touch every inch of you.
His large hands slip underneath your shirt, gripping your sides tight as he caresses your warm skin. Your heart races in your chest, the sounds of rushing blood flooding your ears as you kiss Jihoon, savoring the sweet taste of his lips, basking in the radiant heat of his body against yours.
“Oh wow,” he mutters into your mouth as his lips depart yours briefly.
You grasp onto his tshirt, balling the fabric in your fists, pulling him with you as you stumble toward your bedroom together, still kissing him.
As you step through the doorway, you tug on his shirt, prompting him to remove it. He pauses, contemplating the taste of wine lingering on your lips.
“Are you… drunk?” he asks delicately. “I just want to make sure…”
“A little,” you reply, leaning into him, so close that the vibrations of your soft-spoken words resonate against his lips.
“But I know what I want.”
Jihoon squeezes the flesh of your hips, his grip unrelentless, as if someone was going to take you away from him. A thick bulge beneath his sweatpants presses against you as he holds you tightly against him.
“And what do you want?” he asks in a low voice, staring at you hungrily. “Tell me.”
“First,” you start, pulling at his shirt again. “Get rid of this.”
He yanks his tshirt over his head, tossing it onto the floor. Standing before you now, shirtless, you get a true look at his brawny figure: huge biceps framing his body, thick pectorals protruding from his chest, chiseled abs sculpting his stomach. The man has muscles you didn’t even know existed. You delicately drag your fingertips up and down his torso, admiring him; his cock twitches against you at your touch.
“God you’re so fucking hot,” you mumble as you gaze into his eyes - giving him the most pathetic, needy, seductive look you can muster.
Redness spreads across his neck and chest. He’s clearly easily flustered (at least, for you), and you plan to take full advantage of this.
You slip one finger beneath the waistband of his sweatpants, tugging lightly.
“Now, get rid of these.”
Obediently, he slides his pants down, having to stretch the elastic further to get it over his bulge. Kicking the sweats off, you get a clearer look at what he’s packing. Even through the dark fabric of his underwear, the outline of his hard cock is undeniable - not only long, but thick. Your pussy clenches at the mere sight of his size.
You can't wait any longer. You run your hand over his clothed cock, feeling its weight in your palm. Jihoon groans, letting out the sweet sound you've until now only heard muffled through the wall. Hearing him now, here, in your bedroom - it's music to your ears.
Reaching into his underwear, you grip your hand around his girth - he nearly whimpers at the sensation. You give him a few strokes before pulling his cock fully out, causing you to let out an audible gasp.
Fucking shit.
Jihoon gives you an embarrassed smile, making you realize you said that out loud and not just in your head. But if anything your reaction wasn't even dramatic enough, because his cock is fucking huge. You take him in your fist, slowly pumping up and down; his eyes roll back into his head, letting out a deep sigh as you stroke him. You press your lips into his neck, planting delicate kisses into the soft skin.
“Oh god,” he groans under his breath.
With his dick twitching in your hand, growing stiff and somehow even longer, you drop to your knees, positioning your face directly beneath the behemoth of a cock. You gaze up at him as you drag your tongue from his base to his tip; he strokes your cheek lightly with the back of his fingers, gazing down at you with a look of equal parts admiration and lust. You swirl your tongue around the head, tasting the precum that has dribbled out. Taking just a tiny bit of his tip between puckered lips, you begin suckling on it, lapping up his juices and teasing him with the bare-minimum stimulation. His low hum swells into a moan as you slowly slide his cock into your mouth, taking as much of his length as possible before you start to choke (Not yet, you think to yourself. Save that for later.)
“Fuck, you look so good right now,” he groans, cupping your cheek in his large hand as you stare up at him with big doe eyes. “So beautiful with my cock in that pretty little mouth of yours.”
Sharp throbbing pulses between your legs at the slightest of praise. You slide your mouth up and down his length, gradually increasing your pace. His tip hitting the back of your mouth only makes you want more, makes you want to swallow him whole, gag on the entire shaft as his massive size fills your throat. Finally, you can resist no longer - you swallow the rest of him, your lips greeting his base as his full length slides down your throat. Tears instantly begin welling in your eyes, streaming down your cheeks as you bob your head up and down, choking on Jihoon’s cock.
He places one hand upon your hair, grasping it in his fist as you give him the absolute sloppiest head he’s ever received. Grotesque gagging sounds emanate from your throat, but are nearly drowned out by the lewd string of moans coming from Jihoon. He wants nothing more than to watch you choke on his cock, see your tears flowing freely as you stare up at him, eyes longingly transfixed upon each other - but he can’t help but shut his eyes, head falling back at the overwhelming pleasure you’re making him feel. It starts to take over his whole body - his hips reflexively begin thrusting, sinking his length deep into your throat. Before long he pulls you by the hair, wresting you off of him; strings of saliva stretch from his drenched cock to your coated lips, bubbles of spit running down your chin.
“Sorry, that was going to make me cum way too fast,” he tells you with a sheepish smile. “You’re just so- ohhh…” His sentence is cut off by you placing one of his balls in your mouth, lightly sucking on it before taking the other as well.
“Fuck that’s hot,” he grumbles, stroking your hair gently. You shift on your knees, trying to sit more comfortably upon the floor; Jihoon notices.
“Come here,” he instructs as he pulls you up off the floor. “I want you to be comfortable.”
He brings you over to the bed, laying down atop it. You go to resume your place between his legs, but he grabs your arms to stop you.
“You should take these off,” he insists, tugging at your clothes with desperation in his eyes. “Please. I wanna see you.”
You pull your shirt over your head, discarding it to the floor. Slowly you unfasten your pants, sliding them down your hips - a bit timidly, for as horny as you are right now you’re suddenly afflicted with a wave of shyness. But the way Jihoon is looking at you - eyes glazed over with pure lust, licking his lips like he wants to devour you - is driving you utterly crazy. You swiftly remove your bra and panties, standing nude before him as he marvels at the sight of you.
“You’re perfect,” he says, his voice deep and gravelly. Your pussy clenches, attempting to alleviate the powerful aching in your core. Jihoon takes your hand, drawing you into the side of the bed.
“Sit on my face. Please.”
It’s not an order; the way he is looking up at you, squeezing your hand - he’s begging.
“Only if I can suck your cock at the same time,” you say with a cheeky grin. His eyes widen.
“Would you like that?” you ask coyly, batting your eyelashes at him as you trace circles on his stomach with one fingernail.
“Y-yeah,” he whimpers, his voice cracking slightly.
“Good.”
You crawl onto the bed, swinging your legs over Jihoon’s head as you face his painfully erect cock. You situate yourself steadily, lowering your pussy toward his face, until you feel his soft, plush lips against you. Instantly he lets out a loud moan, the vibrations against your soaked core triggering a sharp jolt in your stomach. He wraps his arms around your inner thighs, holding you tight against him, his moans still resonating through the room even with his face buried in your cunt.
He begins to work his tongue deep into your folds, licking every last bit, lapping up as much of your juices as he possibly can - the rest certainly dripping down his chin. You lean over, reaching for his thick cock one more; you grip the base tight in your fist, stroking the hilt while taking the rest in your mouth, bobbing your head up and down his length. The pathetic noises coming from under your cunt grow even louder - Jihoon begins to squirm underneath you, bucking his hips as he continues eating you out as if the world were ending tomorrow. He latches onto your clit, suckling on the stimulated bud; you cry out, but the sound is garbled amidst your cacophony of unbridled gagging noises. Your eyes flood with tears as your orgasm rapidly approaches - you grind your hips on his face, stimulating your pussy further and further, the burning in your gut swelling and swelling, your legs trembling even in Jihoon’s tight embrace. Your whole body convulses atop of his as you reach your climax. Desperate for air, you pull your head up, your mouth now empty but quickly refilled with cries of pleasure as you cum all over Jihoon’s face.
“Oh my godddd,” you wail, your mind going blank as every nerve in your body lights up like fireworks.
“Oh my god, oh fuckkkk, Jihoon…”
The rumbling vibrations of his groaning carry you through an overpowering orgasm; you ride out your high as he sucks on your clit mercilessly while his nose presses into your cunt. You’re seeing stars as you begin to come down, unable to think any coherent thoughts - instead basking in how fucking incredible Jihoon just made you feel.
You lift your throbbing pussy off his face, giving your poor overstimulated clit a moment to recover.
“Gonna cum, ‘m so close,” Jihoon moans. You quickly pop his dick back into your mouth, sliding his length in and out, hollowing your cheeks as you suck his cock like your life depends on it.
“Ahh, ahhhhh, ah fuck-”
Hot white ropes shoot deep into your throat as he releases. His melodic moans and whining cries form a grand symphony that fills your bedroom - in this moment, you are absolutely certain that you've never heard a more beautiful sound.
His cock pulsates in your mouth, letting out every last spurt of cum for you to eagerly swallow. As he finishes, you slowly slide his cock out of your mouth - still marveling at the sheer size of it.
“Oh my god,” he groans softly. You swing your leg over his head, turning yourself around to lay beside him. You wrap your arms around his torso, becoming the big spoon as you nuzzle your face into his neck.
“Wow,” he proclaims with a deep, satisfied exhale. He lays silently as he recovers, catching his breath and coming back down to earth. Finally, with a sigh, he turns to face you. You raise your head up enough for your noses to meet.
Jihoon gazes into your eyes, eyelids heavy in his post-orgasmic bliss. He hesitates, bringing his hand up to your cheek and cradling it gently.
“Can I kiss you?” he finally asks, his voice no more than a soft whisper.
You nod. He kisses you - this time not hungry and desperate, but slow and saccharine. Your lips lock, laying there entangled in each other’s embrace - his muscular arms hold you tight, enveloping you in the warmth radiating from both of your sweat-covered bodies. As your lips eventually part, you remain snuggled by his side - him playing with your hair while you trace your fingertips over his toned body. Eventually, he takes your chin delicately in his hand, tilting your face up to look at him.
“I don’t know if fucking your next door neighbor is necessarily a wise thing to do,” he starts. “But that was incredible. You’re incredible.”
You smile.
“I don't know either,” you chuckle. “But the way you basically broke down my door to come fuck me was really hot.”
Jihoon laughs, his face lighting up with a beaming smile.
“Yeah, um. I'm not entirely sure what compelled me to do that.”
“I do,” you inform him. “You were thinking with your dick.”
“Okay yeah, you're right,” he admits with a grin.
He reaches for your hand, interlacing his fingers with yours, squeezing your palm.
“Would you want to do this again?”
“Like, right now?” you reply.
“No I mean like- … well, yes actually,” he answers, his face lighting up with excitement. “But I meant like, in the future.”
You nod, a wide grin spreading across your face.
“I’d like that.”
“Good,” he smiles. “Me too.”
“But also…”
Your arms grab hold of him, rolling him over on top of you. He tries to shift, to not be placing his whole weight upon you, but you cling to him tightly, holding him in place. You roll your hips, stroking his still half-erect cock with your soaked cunt; you feel it pulse in response, already beginning to harden again.
“I want you to fuck me,” you speak softly into his ear, continuing to grind your pussy on his cock. His eyes roll back in his head once more.
“God you're so fucking hot,” he mumbles through gritted teeth. His eyelashes flutter as his eyes open again, peering down at you amorously.
“Give me just a minute, baby,” he says as he shifts downward, positioning himself directly in front of your boobs. He grabs one with each hand, kneading the soft flesh in his grasp. He licks your nipple, swirling his tongue around the protruding bud, wetting it with his warm mouth before switching to your other breast. He gives them equal attention, licking and sucking on them, back and forth - whichever boob isn't in his mouth, he pinches your hard nipple, squeezing and rolling it between his thumb and forefinger. You press your hips up into his stomach, seeking any relief for your aching clit, but it's not enough. You whimper as he latches on to your left nipple, suckling on it so long you think you might cum again just from this. You feel the bed move beneath you as he grinds his cock against the sheets, thrusting into the mattress, seeking relief for his returned erection.
He lifts his head up, releasing his latch on your breast with a wet-sounding pop. His eyes stay fixed on you as he shifts further down the bed, resting comfortably between your legs as his lips hover above your cunt.
“Is this okay?” he checks before placing his mouth on you. You nod earnestly, brushing your fingers through his damp, messy hair. His tongue locates your entrance, slipping into your pussy, his nose brushing up against your clit, still highly sensitive from your first orgasm. You moan as his tongue glides through your folds, his face becoming soaked once again in your juices. He flickers over your clit, the warmth and wetness of his tongue quickly sending you over the edge. Your body writhes beneath him as you cum a second time, crying out with even greater pleasure than the first. It's almost overbearing, but you relish in it, delicious waves of bliss pulsating throughout your whole being. His tongue slows, licking you softly as you lay there, unable to move for a few good minutes, basking in the aftermath of your orgasm. Your fist slowly unclenches, releasing the grip you didn't realize you had on his tousled locks.
“Damn,” you mumble, a big goofy grin spreading across your face. Jihoon crawls back up toward you, kissing you with lips drenched in your own cum. His cock, fully hard once more, brushes against your cunt. Although you're still trying to catch your breath, you place your entrance against his tip to taunt him.
“Please fuck me,” you beg, desperate to feel him inside you.
He pushes his cockhead into your pussy, letting out a moan as he feels your warmth. Your walls tighten as he slides the rest of his length in, fully enveloping his cock - he whines, loudly, letting the delicious sensation overtake him. He rests for a moment inside you, fearing to move as he feels the urge to cum already. But he’s too aroused to resist for much longer - slowly he begins to pump into you, deep thrusts stretching you out, filling you up like you've never felt before. He’s almost too big, but you love it. Tears well in your eyes again as he fucks you - slow and tender at first, but gradually increasing his pace, soon pounding into you with powerful force. The stretch is overwhelming, but his long strokes and perfect tempo have you screaming his name, voluminous cries filling the air as he fucks you like you’ve never been fucked before.
“You’re taking me so well baby,” he praises, his voice low and breathy. “So pretty…”
His voice trails off. High-pitched grunts and groans escape him as his body begins to stiffen, another climax rapidly on its way. He drives his cock into you, your perfect pussy squeezing him so tight that he can't think straight.
“Y/n…” he cries. “Fuck, y/n I'm cumming…”
With several powerful thrusts he releases deep inside you, warm cum filling you up until you're completely full - so full that it begins to leak out of you, coating his cock and dripping all over the sheets. He finishes, laying frozen on top of you, heaving breaths echoing in your ear as he sinks his face into the crook of your neck. His cock rests inside you still, twitching occasionally against your walls. His breathing becomes so steady that you start to think he’s fallen asleep - but eventually he lifts his head, resting his temple on his fist as he takes in the sight of you, so pretty and fucked out beneath him. A lazy smile appears on his face as he stares at you, his pink cheeks glowing in his post-orgasm state. He looks so good that you involuntarily let out a little giggle.
“What?” he asks, his grin growing wider.
“You're just really hot, that's all.”
His face somehow turns even rosier. He lets out an embarrassed tsk as he tries to hide his face in his hands.
“What? You are!!” you proclaim, pulling his hands away so you can see him again.
“Sorry,” he replies timidly. “I’m not good with compliments.”
“You'll get used to it,” you say matter-of-factly. He raises an eyebrow at you.
“You say that like this is going to be a regular thing now,” he retorts, trying to keep a straight face - but the corners of his mouth twitch upward, revealing the grin he's trying to hold back.
“Do you want it to be?” you ask.
Unable to hide his smile any longer, he nods.
“I’d like that.”
Slowly, he pulls his spent cock out of you, making you whine at the empty sensation as even more of his cum spills out of you.
“Wait here,” he says, giving you a soft kiss on your cheek as he rises from the bed. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”
#ren's fics ੈ♡₊˚•.#svthub#lee jihoon#woozi#woozi smut#woozi fics#woozi scenarios#woozi imagines#svt smut#svt fics#svt imagines#svt scenarios#seventeen smut#seventeen fics#seventeen imagines#seventeen scenarios#woozi x reader#svt x reader#seventeen x reader#seventeen hard hours#svt hard hours
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sexuality:
child who doesnt know labels exist thinks "i hope i fall in love with a girl"
is an idiot who doesnt relize its gay until a freaking mobile game tells them!!!
descovers the term lesbian
questions being bi or omni etc,
looks for gender neutral labels when realised its nonbinary
neptunic!!!
or am i omni??? or noma?
nah
neptunic
(also some other time later this happened again idk where exactly in the timeline tho but it happened agian)
oh hey i might be aceflux- im aegosexual!!!!-cupio?-nah ageo no cupio, no aego-wait im just ace, no im-okay i was right the first time im aceflux.
realised i might be frayromantic-no im not-yes i am-how can i know? maybe i havent met the right person yet yah im fray-but WAT IF IM WRONG?!?! nah bro ur type is litearlly girls you dont know lmao.
but what about all those times we imagined falling in love and dating? -those were either cardboard shells with pretty faces and laughs, or imaging being in a qpr actually,
so we cant...fall...in love? -nope but we can form strong platonic bonds and be in queerplatonic relationships!
GETS HIT WITH THE APLATONIC WRECKINGBALL
...what happened. i thought i figured it out?
um...now what?
okay so alterous attraction. yeah alterous attraction. that solves that.
"gay Freddy Fazbear *appears in my head setting off the domino affect of being fictional gay men somehow?"
where this is right now: to simplify things i say i'm neptunic aceflux and frayromatic, which is true, but im also some sort of multisexuality that can like all genders, completly aroace, a gay man, a lesbian who doesnt care to think to hard about other labels, polyamorous, cupio, gray, and someother stuff probably too. why? well because their are people living in my head who are also me but also not (just me) so basically i'm mulitble sexualities inside of multible sexualities. oh, i also forgot to mention im objectum.
aka my "sexuality" is a mess.
LGBTQ+ folk what was your gender/sexuality pipeline?
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I haven't said as much about electoral politics this year as I have in previous cycles, because I am exhausted like everyone else and have nothing new or helpful to add. That is still true, so caveat lector I guess lmao!!! Happy American Election Day Fellow Sufferers!!
I have been experiencing an internal backlash the last few years to my extremely Sorkinpilled D.C. private school upbringing -- my childhood spent as a kind of convent schoolgirl in the faith of The System Is Good If We All Participate, which of course has a uhhh let's say generously a minimal engagement with the ways in which many of us are by design shut out of participating. I don't think idealism is necessarily childish, but I think MY idealism certainly has childish qualities, an undergirding of 90s feel-goodism, of civic participation as a subtle ego stroke and of voting -- although I would never have consciously put it this way -- as a way to feel superior to people who don't vote.
Lately there has bubbled up in me a sludgy, adolescent fury at this whole stupid country that has made it very very hard to feel like I should do even the bare minimum. For these people? AMERICANS? The ones that not only want Donald Trump to be president but saw what happened the first time and were like, We love this, do it again but worse? Whatever, fuckos. "I hope you people get your dearest wish and it chews you to death slowly," I may have thought.
I have also thought: why is it so controversial to ask elected officials to stop funding a genocide? Why are we treating people who make that ask, who are watching the current administration directly fund death on a mass scale and objecting to that choice, as if they are being babies and just need to get over it? How are they supposed to get over it? Why is anybody over it?
Anyway all this means that I, a known chipper door-knocker and caller of congresspeople, have been pretty low-key this current cycle. I think that is OK. I don't want to make this a big dramatic confessional about how I didn't write enough postcards or whatever. We all get exhausted and this was my turn.
But it has also been an illuminating cycle in that it's made it clear to me how much at my big age I still want politics to make me feel good, and when they don't, I still have the urge to throw a lil tantrum about it! I can get very superior and intellectual about how right-wing operatives manipulate their voters emotionally WITHOUT EVEN NOTICING that I too have been manipulated, in my case into the feeling that nonparticipation is a kind of revolutionary act.* Just absolute "I threw it on the GROUND" logic happening inside my head. "Maybe if I don't vote I will be doing Quiet Quitting, which is uhhhhh anticapitalist." I'm not a part of your system!!!
Anyway, I am trying to have self-compassion about it, and one way for me to do that is to project my internal experience onto a theoretical reader. That would be you, my imaginary friend who clicked on this post for some reason even though you have already decided not to vote! I just want to tell you that I am more sympathetic to your point of view than I have ever been in my whole life, and I'm sorry I have historically been a glib, holier-than-thou asshole about it in ways that may actually have made you MORE resistant to civic participation.
And you're right: it doesn't make that big a difference whether I personally vote or not, or whether you do. But if there are hundreds of us, and I think there are, then each of those people individually do starts to matter.
I guess I would humbly request that you and I both pay attention to what people who need help are actually asking for. I would ask that we both notice who wins when we abdicate this single responsibility. I would remind us both that participating in the electoral process is not some kind of weird either-or with participating in decentralized community building and mutual aid, and the best people we know do both. Isn't it interesting that somehow, insidiously, without even consciously becoming aware of this belief, we have started to think that you can only do one or the other? Who is telling us that story? Who does it serve?
Anyway. I took the stupid 90 minute round trip to my polling place which was VERY hot for some reason and I stood in the stupid line and some babies waved at me and I cast my vote for Kamala Harris and I'm glad I did it in the same way I'm glad after I do the dishes or take a stupid shower. Doing work doesn't always feel like anything. I also saw a really wonderful small black and white dog that I thought was a cat on a leash. I would not have seen that dog if I hadn't gone to vote. So politics can still make you feel good!!!
*I mean all this analysis is cute and everything BUT ALSO i did switch antidepressants twice in the last year, an astonishingly grueling process that almost made me [affect the trout population]. Could these things be related? hmmmmmmm, don't understand the question, won't respond to it.
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Dc x dp prompt: Red Hood needs pure ectoplasm to continue staying alive and sane. The only place he can get it though, is his dealer: Vlad Masters, trying to turn his life around and be a proper father to Dan in Gotham.
(Btw, I do not condone smoking, I just think it's something Jason and Dan would do to cope. And for aesthetic purposes lmao)
Jason sighed, pinching the cigarette between his fingers as he breathed out smoke.
What was he supposed to do now?
He found out through Deadman that he needed ectoplasm to get rid of the pit rage inside of him, but the only known source of ectoplasm was apparently from a man named Vlad Masters, who was also a multi-billionaire.
Let it be known that Jason hated billionaires.
He took another huff of his cigarette, plotting on how to steal some ectoplasm or find another way without having to speak to some rich snob, when someone stepped up next to him.
Jason did not tense or move, even though his heart almost leapt to his throat.
"Can I get a light?"
Jason reached into his pocket and lit the lighter, allowing the other person to light their cigarette as well. The two of them smoked in silence.
Then finally, the other man asked, "Do you wanna talk about it?"
Jason puffed. "I need something from someone, but I can't get it because he's a rich asshole. And I don't want to talk to him."
The other man snorted. "Real. My dad is trying to be nice to me by buying me a dozen cars."
Jason groaned. "Oh my god, all rich people are the same!" After all, Bruce also did the same until he realized that not every kid wanted a dozen watches worth over billions of dollars.
The other man laughed and after a moment of silence where they just smoked, he asked again, "Who's the rich person you don't want to talk to?"
Well, what harm could it do?
"Someone named Vlad Masters."
The man audibly turned and Jason looked up, only to see a wide, fanged smile stretch over the other man's face. In fact, he looked a little familiar.
"No shit? Y'know what? I'll help you, free of charge since you lit my cigarette for me."
#dc x dp#dp x dc#danny phantom x dc#dpxdc#dcxdp#dp x dc crossover#ask#anon ask#jason todd#dark danny#dan fenton#dan phantom
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The first ever "links meet" au I ever stumbled upon was the sweetest fic ever that I'm so sad I lost and haven't found again yet cause for the longest time that au was just 100% canon in my head lol and I still like it so much I want to find it again :( I remember it being actively updated back in 2014 when I was active in the zelda fandom (before my 10 year hiatus and me joining back again this year lol)
But basically the au played with the idea that hylia has like a special place in the afterlife for the hero's spirit, as compensation for their service to her and the 3 golden goddesses, so when a link dies the little afterlife space starts getting buildings or landmarks the link loved during life
So the au starts with ss!link chilling there alone, but he's able to see what his successors do from the afterlife! Then mc!link joins him when he dies and basically the little space starts getting bigger and bigger the more links die and join the little afterlife space
The only link who never joins because he is like THE hero's spirit is the first hero, and if I remember correctly ss!link tries the entire fic to meet him despite knowing it won't happen :(
Since it was during 2014 I remember the last link joining everyone was albw!link and I thought it was THE cutest cause the other links nicknamed him ALBY and like isn't that the cutest nickname ever
ANYWAY, i may have gotten some things wrong cause like...IT'S BEEN 1O YEARS LMAO but if anyone remembers it or if the author reads this, just know that I haven't stopped thinking about that au and that I love it with all my heart and I would love anyone forever if they find it again for me 🥺💖
#it was pretty great cause ss!link was like THE senior link and everyone like respected him and he was the leader#but like he was just chilling and being his eepy self despite existing for millenia lmao#i remember mc!link was my fave cause he pulled the seniority card with the other links all the time#but he liked representing himself as a little kid in the afterlife which made the dynamic so funny lol#also his nickname was mini which was like so cute mini hero#ravio was there too like albw!link (alby) perpetual roommate even in the afterlife lmao#ANYWAY THIS AU...THIS FIC....IT MEANS SO MUCH TO ME#AUTHOR I LOVE YOU YOU DON'T KNOW ME BUT YOU CHANGED MY LIFE FOREVER#i really wanna find this fic again it's ao special to my heart and soul#miry's yapping
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I think somebody out there wants me to kill myself lmao. I keep seeing things on here that could all potentially ruin my mood, and now I see holes getting shot through one of my lifelines amidst the sinking sands of depression. I knew Goku was never entirely a righteous hero, but in fact got a lot of thrill from fighting, which is why he would sometimes leave a worthy opponent alive so he can fight him again, even if they were an extremely dangerous individual to let roam free. But this says that it's literally all he cares about? Some of the claims OP made are, at the very least, not backed up in the source provided by the other poster. It doesn't say here that he only feels companionship not love, and that he would only care for a second if his family and friends died.***
It's pretty messed up. The same article makes both Goku and Toriyama not look so great all at once. In it, he also admits that his motivation for writing DBZ was nothing more than money, and doesn't say that he learned to love it or have any connection to his fans (in fact, he mentions intentionally messing with them and being contrary to their wishes), just seems to imply that it was an easier job than most. I'm tempted to share this with the person who got me into DBZ but also I don't want to ruin anything for them. Then again, they're the type to say "I prefer the brutal truth" so...
Ah fuck but what about all my followers who like DBZ? Goddammit...I wanted to say my piece but I guess it's selfish of me to ruin it for others. But, well, actually there may be some consolation for those who already saw this, because Toriyama also states that he forgets some of the things he writes. He also says he doesn't take care of his illustrations after he finishes them. Which is really weird and kind of disheartening to hear that he had so little passion for the story he built and shared with so many fans worldwide. But the point is, it seems that many fans are closer to the material than even he is, and as I've said before about the Harry Potter series, you can separate the content from the creator by acknowledging that 1) it is fiction and 2) there is a difference between who the author is, how the author interprets their own work, and what enjoyers make of it. These characters live in our consciousness as we built them too. We put our own heart into it just by immersing ourselves in it. Yeah, sure, Toriyama had a different vision of Goku than maybe a lot of fans did, but that doesn't make those interpretations we acquired and stored less valid. We all used our own imaginations to interact with what we watched or read. The version of the character that you see, and which makes the most sense to you is "real," because it's all unreal anyway.
And honestly? A more complex Goku who loves fighting for the thrill of it AND fighting for his friends makes the most sense anyway. We've seen it, we've seen his genuine care and concern. He's proven himself to be "pure of heart."
***Edit: They do actually include more sources that I didn't initially see which does confirm this, at least the part about seeing his family more as companions, though that doesn't change my final statement.
I just really find the fact that the creator of dragonball has stated that Goku canonically cannot feel any kind of love, just ‘companionship’, to be a extremely interesting fact. Like, if his family died he’d be like ‘No!’ and then he’d get over it fairly quickly as if they were only just acquaintances. Same goes with the rest of his friends.
The series creator apparently doesn’t like the anime’s portrayal of Goku. They always cast Goku as a hero, when in the manga he’s really only ‘saving people’ as a side bonus that comes with fighting a stronger opponent. He doesn’t purposefully go in to save anyone unless there is a fight happening at the scene.
So, If Goku hadn’t hit his head, he would’ve just been another Raditz. And it also explains why he’s rather cruel towards Gohan and neglectful towards Chichi.
Apparently Vegeta is the actual exception to his own species. He actually genuinely loves his family, -a rare trait only Goku’s mother was proven to have- whereas Goku is apparently literally unable to have those feelings. It’s kind of ironic; Vegeta is probably the one that would be the most ashamed and resentful to admit he has those kinds of feelings.
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How do u think the rest of the homicipher guys would react after that one scarletella ending where u make him ur servant LMAO
Dyt crawly would be especially bothered by it 😭
Scarletta ending.
context: Homicipher boys reactions to the mr scarletta ending where he’s basically your servant.
Homicipher. mr crawling, mr chopped, mr silvair, mr gap, mr hood. | Anypov. Fluff.
Uhh didn’t do this ending yet so i’m slightly unsure about these? they are super short, but I didn’t wanna keep you waiting. (can you tell mr crawling is my fav)
mr crawling.
lowkey..weirded out, kind of upset, off put, maybe a little jealous. Because why do you need that freak to bend to your will when you have HIM!!
They beef hardcore. If you remember there’s a route where Mr. Crawling saves you from Scarletta, and he’s covering your eyes and yelling at Scarletta. (also that fanart of mr crawling flipping off scarletta lolol)
Like babe what do you mean the guy who tried to kill you is now your pet?? pookie wdym … literally doesn’t trust him at all.
Clings to you and he doesn’t like when Mr Scarletta gets too close. He’s salty as shit like hoe back UP!!!! But honestly as long as you give him extra attention and special treatment he’ll be ight..
mr chopped.
get. him. away. from that thing. NEOW!! literally whines and pouts and yells, if he had a body he would be kicking and hitting his hands and feet, full blown tantrum. He’s literally like so shocked like wdym?? he’s here?? with you?? nuh uh.
your not allowed to let Mr. Scarletta touch him or else he’ll literally die. (his words not mine..)
Glares as him whenever he sees you with him..
mr silvair.
I think he’s pretty chill. A little shocked at first..but chill. Maybe he just keeps his distance a little bit, but I don’t think he’d make a big ordeal.
First time he sees Mr. Scarletta with you he just stares for a minute. Like this is normal now? If you say so.
I think he’d want to experiment on him kinda sorta maybe. I don’t think he’d actually attempt it though, or maybe he’d ask. But I really just think he’d be chill about it. Nonchalant vibes yk (/hj)
mr gap.
first of all, FUCK mr gap I have PERSONAL beef with bro. Secondly he probably actively avoids you. He sees you with Mr. Scarletta, he’s never seeing you again. buh-bye!!
he was nice enough to save you from him and now you wanna ASSOCIATE with him?? just ungrateful.
mr hood.
I’m ngl I think he’s also chill/indifferent like me silvair ..maybe a little more chill and indifferent.
He just leaves you be for the most part? unless you need him he’s there for you but he just keeps to himself. Maybe he’ll wander and keep an eye on you just in case..
I don’t think he trusts you with Scarletta, but like I don’t think there’s really anything he does about it. Other than checking up on you and watching you from afar.
1:18 pm. 11/03/2024. @i90o3
#*i90o3}#homicipher#homicipher fanfiction#homicipher x reader#mr crawling x reader#mr crawling#mr scarletta#mr gap#mr chopped head#mr silver#mr hood#fanfiction#fluff headcanons
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hiii, could you elaborate on jaime's relationship with tywin in the books? and how tywin's introduction in the show diverges from that? 🥺👉👈
lol because that scene never happens in the books?
because nothing like it really happens in the books?
lmao, because, the first time we see any real sign of tywin and jaime’s relationship it’s tywin saying ‘tyrion, why do you suck while jaime is a god?’
it’s such a disservice to tyrion and cersei to pretend that jaime doesn’t have tywin’s approval, or perhaps even admiration.
unlike that weird season 1 deer scene, in the books tywin doesn’t blame jaime for being in the kingsguard. that’s aerys’s fault as far as tywin knows. after all, if tywin himself couldn’t prevent it, how could jaime? (sure we know better, but tywin doesn’t.)
and do you think tywin isn’t proud of jaime for killing aerys? do you think tywin wasn’t thinking ‘that’s my boy’ after the sack of king’s landing? that shit was right in tywin’s wheelhouse.
and then there’s the one interaction we see between jaime and tywin. jaime walks in knowing what he’s facing with twyin vs tyrion. that’s because jaime has always had tywin’s number in a way cersei and tyrion never did. why? because jaime has seen what tywin is capable of and he doesn’t like it. jaime quite literally takes tyrion’s kidnapping in agot into his own hands because he doesn’t trust tywin to look out for tyrion. as he’s on his way back to king’s landing in asos he thinks about just what he’s actually worth to his father and how much that calculation has taken a hit now that he’s short a hand.
so when tywin asks jaime to give up the kingsguard, does jaime hang his head and scuff his toe like his show counterpart? lmao. this is the difference in privilege between jaime and his siblings. jaime immediately says: noooo. and means it. not only means it, but from that moment starts plotting against tywin and cersei to save tyrion.
we see this reinforced when cersei begs jaime to save her from tywin’s machinations to marry her off again and he’s like, lol, tell that bitch no. to jaime it’s a very simple, very accomplishable thing if you don’t give a shit about tywin’s disapproval.
because jaime’s been walking away from tywin since he was a kid.
the only moment jaime even wavers in that interaction with his dad is when tywin disowns him. lol and that is not about approval. it’s because all jaime wants in the world is love, and up to this point love was a thing that existed exclusively in the realm of his family.
and lest there be any doubt, i ask you, who breaks first? the last real thing jaime hears from his father is a message sent through kevan. a peace offering, in the form of oathkeeper. here it is, son, the valyrian steel i’ve been trying to reclaim for the fam for years. it’s yours. you’re my boy.
and what does jaime do with tywin’s sword? lmao. i ask you. what does jaime do with tywin’s sword?
see, book!jaime’s story with tywin is not about tywin’s disapproval of jaime. it’s about jaime’s disapproval of tywin. it’s embedded in his chapters. it’s embedded in his character. everything about jaime’s latent lust for honor is a repudiation of twyin’s ethos.
he disapproves of tywin’s use of gregor clegane and amory lorch. he disapproves of tywin’s orders to kill aegon and rhaenys. any lack of understanding of tywin’s nature is destroyed by the tysha incident, which appalls jaime.
he isn’t looking for tywin’s approval. all he ever wanted was tywin’s love.
all of this is reinforced in feast. it’s everywhere in jaime’s vigil for tywin as he tries to do his duty but can’t cough up a single tear and even chucks the appearance of grief out the window when his living breathing son, who he definitely feels late breaking affection for, needs him. it’s when he looks around the realm and goes oh shit, this would have been tywin’s problem but now it’s mine and uses tywin’s reputation to accomplish his goals without actually employing tywin’s monstrous ruthlessness.
but mostly we know the whole show concept that jaime’s just always been trying to earn tywin’s approval is bullshit as far as book!jaime is concerned, because we’ve read jaime’s chapters and we know the truth.
it’s joanna’s disapproval that literally haunts jaime. not tywin’s.
#jaime lannister#asoiaf#cannot believe i'm tagging this because i know this will bring the disk horse to my door#but this is what i'm doing with my election day anxiety#your jaime priors are show based#which is fine if you're talking about the show#but if you want to talk about book!jaime#why not actually talk about book!jaime#also my original comment about this was about an r/asoiaf comment#for the anon who thinks it was about them#anon#chicky gets anons
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i added my thoughts to the takavoltti lyrical analysis here but today i want to talk about why i think takavoltti is one of käärijä's most finnish songs ever.
this got a bit long, so just so you know what to expect going in: what i mean by most finnish is that there are references and tone of voice that are very specific to finland, there is complex use of the finnish language AND there are melodic/musical choices in the song that sound very finnish to me.
okay, here goes.
the dialogue that opens the song is already a sort of key moment to this finnishness of it all. when he says "emmä tiedä, kolisee jos kolisee, mut mun on pakko sit koittaa vetää tosi matalalla" he is doing a bit of a voice but more than that, he is talking in a way that is not quite his. his inflection, the rhythm, those are not natural to him or his dialect. you can hear it particularly when he says "koittaa vetää tosi matalalla". i don't know if it's at all easy to hear if you're not finnish, but it's not.. a serious voice or tone. the other two voices, one of them is modified to be high and the other talks like a sports announcer. the whole scene is quite comedic and it's a very specific genre of comedy that is very finnish indeed. it's also the type of thing he has been doing since always. (EDIT: OKEI MORE CONTEXT IN A REBLOG HERE)
funnily enough, you guys know köpi kallio now, the therapist in skit and autiomaa video? yeah köpi and his long time partner in crime viki are good examples of this type of humour i would say. they have their own podcast/show called viki ja köpi show but before that they were radio hosts and have been working together for ten years. the character voices and the whole vibe of the scene in the beginning of the song is very viki ja köpi to me, very ylex type comedy (yes ylex the radio station who did the ruisrock interview who still isn't back from the war).
and the small comedy bits stay in there through out the song, and they continue to have the same delivery instantly recognisable as comedic.
and that isn't to say the subject matter can't be serious. i think, again, this is something that feels inherently finnish to me. other finnish people feel free to chime in because this is hard to explain, but our culture is one where coping through making light of things is quite normal. and our sense of humour tends to be on the darker side, at least if you compare it to the american style of comedy that has taken over globally. so to make a song about there being too many demands on you and how you have a problem with setting boundaries and agreeing to insane shit, but to do it by interjecting the song with jokes just idk.. it sits in our culture lmao.
i honestly don't know how to explain this better, but quite dark comedic elements like this (after all he gets properly fucked up in the stunts it seems) in a song with a serious subject matter is something we've been doing for decades in this country (juice leskinen, for example) and it is something so loved by finnish people. we love a song that is just fucked up on multiple levels. käärijä is just adding his own style to this cultural history.
okay, onto the language.
the verse opens with "tekevälle sattuu" which is a finnish proverb.
quick finnish lesson: the word sattua in finnish means both to hurt and to happen. the word tehdä means to do but tehdä kipeää means hurting. like.. now that i think about it tämä tekee kipeää = this is doing (me a) hurt is valid and correct finnish lmao.
tekevälle sattuu, the proverb, actually means "things happen to those who do" but he is playing with the different meanings here, because he goes on to say "ain sattuu ku tekee" which can both mean "things always happen when you do" or it can mean "it always hurts when you do". then he goes on to say "ku tekee, ku kipee, ni kipeetä tekee" which is once again playing with words, because kipee here means both pain but also being sick. "ku tekee, ku kipee" would translate as "when you do as if you're sick" and "kipeetä tekee" means that it hurts.
so to recap (i'm not trying to provide a smooth translation, but highlight his wordplay:
tekevälle sattuu = things/pain happen to those who do [things]
ain sattuu ku tekee = shit happens/you get hurt when you do [things]
ku tekee, ku kipee, ni kipeetä tekee = when you do [things] like you're sick [in the head], you get hurt
so this is all to say two things: he's using the finnish language in a very clever way that really only becomes clear if you know the language and all of these idioms and proverbs. and also that he is very good at what he does. it has taken me four paragraphs to explain 13 words.
and he doesn't even end there. "oon yllytyshullu, ain hulluksi yllyn" is more play on words. jesus, jere. okay guys, stay with me.
yllytyshullu i explained in my previous analysis, but recap: yllytys means incitement and hullu means crazy. yllytyshullu is someone who does crazy shit when prompted.
"ain hulluksi yllyn" here he is using the word yltyä which is the same root as yllytys, but yltyä means usually more like.. to intensify. (for example: sade yltyy = the rain is getting heavier, or tuuli yltyy = the wind is picking up)
so to say hulluksi yllyn, he's saying like.. i let myself be incited and/or i always take it to the max, to the point of crazy.
and then he uses very clever rhyming words: "ja tää hullunmylly on kylmempi kylpy". hullu means crazy, mylly means mill, hullunmylly is basically a hullabaloo.
as you can tell, all of this is like bordering on impossible to translate accurately into a smooth translation. and that's just the first verse, but i'd be here all night if i explained the whole entire song 😭
and this to me is a very clear sign that no matter what sort of an audience he has internationally, he's not compromising on his language. and i find that admirable and, as a finnish person, very comforting too. this song is sort of reassuring, like he is reinserting himself very firmly into finnish culture, with the language and the comedy that do not translate very well.
and if you look at the pre-chorus and chorus, the specific references keep coming: calling him kärtsä (finnish people have a lot of nicknames for him), "hyppää kybäst pommi" the slang use of kybä to mean ten meters, he mentions duudsonit (the dudesons) and he mentions jorvi hospital. all of these feel like he is signalling to a very finnish audience. (also "oon syypää sun hymyyn" could count as a cheek reference, cheek used to be like the biggest rapper in finland).
okay, time for melody and music speak. i only have one simple point here: melodically and musically speaking that has to be the most suomi iskelmä chorus i've heard from him. ever.
you could take that melody and insert it as the chorus to like any song on iskelmä radio. iskelmä is a finnish schlager music genre. kind of impossible to describe but something that finnish people will instantly recognise. the opening, with the piano synth could also open an iskelmä song.
very suomi, very iskelmä.
so.
all of this is why i think takavoltti is about as finnish as it gets. a suomi iskelmä about having serious issues with boundaries that uses clever finnish and paints a comedic picture of a banged up black-eyed käärijä who has dislocated his shoulder but is still showing thumbs up is like.. so much finnish condensed into three and a half minutes.
i know not everyone thinks the song is hilarious but i do. it's both hilarious and very serious and that's how we like it here.
and of course the fact that there is an "ai vittu" in there. we like that too.
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this was really relatable to us apologies beforehand OP but this really spoke to our robot aft so;
legit been thinking for many months about adding a disclaimer to our instant messaging app profiles (and if we ever using dating apps again) that says "Don't ask me out unless you're willing to read EXRID or even just Best of Arcee plus having carefully considered the full meaning IDW1 Arcee's wiki page and that essay we wrote that one time" because literally only one person (who we're still friends with) out of more than a handful did that latter step (not specifically for this reason but it came up) and that was most we felt like someone understood us and could respect our boundaries and desires in retrospect, save for us wanting her to be able to love herself and accept that people care for and think well of her (this has gotten a lot better from what we can tell).
finding a succinct way to put that on a shirt honestly is tempting for another reason after dealing with a probable chaser cis guy recently who could not take the hint on us mentioning how much we liked the transfeminine narratives in transformers and it took outing ourselves as "sapphic/enbian" (this is just living and breathing) and plural (more difficult but in the space we were at the time not really) + a gal friend of ours (bless your heart dear pal) showing up and us lighting up to say hi to our friend for him to take the hint and he left immediately without saying goodbye or a word when I said bye. which combined with the fact he had tipped off knowing I was trans earlier in a weird way that made me wonder why would you ask me to come out for a smoke if you know it's unhealthy for me my guy kind of told me that he um well was not interested in respecting me. this is the third chaser we've dealt with so far in our life bleh.
I mean. I already looked like I was out in that peak 2010s undergrad degree queer showing who I am and what my neurodivergence is through pins kind of way?!!? How do you look at someone with a pin of Anode/Lug embracing + Greenlight/Lancer together not to mention various other gals (Aileron and Arcee included) and a lesbian colors Arcee and conclude 'this insert slur trans gal is primarily interested in cis men or evenly bisexual and I should totally try to follow up on this when it's very clear you're trying to leave to go home' at a transformers convention (the kicker is he did not know much about transformers so he was what. there to pick up trans women since somehow that deep cut of a takeway that transfems like transformers was disjointed from why?) lmao? lmao. lmao! its funny in retrospect but also absolutely ridiculous and concerning.
Maybe when we finish our EVA back stacks we'll have to write trans4trans on them to shoo people or something but we already know that in itself isn't enough
(note also to please not do this to straight/androphilic transfems either okay even if transness is why you're attracted it shouldn't be for fetishizing transness reasons you need to consider the full scope of what acting on attraction entails and thus value the needs and desires of the other person rather than have their worth be contingent on sexualization)
very beautiful art of gabriel btw
Gabriel in leather
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going through all the stages of grief today lmao!! whatever im gonna play video game now!!
#im very very very nervous i feel like my stomach is about to fly out of my mouth#oh my god lollllllllllll#what will i do if he wins LMAO!! i have a 4 year old daughter lol she can’t grow up in this bull shit!!!!!#i gotta get out of here LMAO!!!!!!!!#im gonna be sick#i took the day off knowing i would be useless today also off tomorrow#help!! also i think my period is coming which is. amazing timing lol i am already on the brink of death#why not!! haha!! sure why not!!!!!!#i need to read thanzag IMMEDIATELY I need to be healed#this is so bad……#im scared oh god….#i hate how little control we have over our own lives#here we are on the brink of maybe our last election lol like no exaggeration do you think if they win they will let us vote again#im just glad I don’t live near dc anymore it was scary last time#omg…#I think I will be offline today if you see posts it’s just the queue
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.
#us election venting beware:#i am actually a bit annoyed at all the people that told me i was just being pessimistic and it's not healthy to think the worst of people#when yet again we have proven the worst of people wins#and even if it doesn't win (it will) it is still so significantly mobilized and out there#like i know it's not helpful. but i TOLD YOU. everyone thought it wouldn't happen and it DID.#just like nobody thought it would happen THEN and i was apparently the only one around me who saw it coming.#now can we PLEASE take this problem SERIOUSLY and get off our fucking asses and admit it's fucked out there??#the core of our system is bad. it is rotting and the proof is in this joke of an election#so can every white liberal get off my ass for 'bringing down the vibe' or whatever?#you people have been LAZY for a long time. you have been comfortable and unmotivated and been doing NOTHING.#quit focusing on doing your best by voting and get the fuck out there and disrupt. radicalize!#'common sense' is not enough and it never was#i hate to say it but believing the best in the masses in this deeply racist country will disappoint you every time#and i can't believe so many people fell for it again!!!!#i know it's unfair but#i'm finding it really difficult to sympathize with people in my community who are sad and disappointed#when i watched you do NOTHING for YEARS#(not for the people that are actively in danger. my heart breaks for you. i will not stop fighting for you. you didn't deserve this.)#i have never believed that people are fundamentally good and i'm sorry if that's mean but it's just not true#people are fundamentally neutral and you have to WORK to push them towards 'good'#and for too long the pushing has been going in the other direction. but 'pushing' at all is uncouth to you people i guess#get over your decorum. get over your morals that mean nothing. no one else is playing by your rules. DO something. CARE MORE.#sorry. i'm angry. i am filled with rage. and it is mostly directed towards the white intellectual elite.#to anyone who is blindingly furious i see you and i am with you lmao.#to anyone that wants to say 'i told you so' you are so valid.#we keep going.#futhermore: 'it's only four years. we'll recover.' BITCH#ONLY four years? that's four years of DAMAGE that will really hurt people in the meantime#and set up a whole host of problems for the future! the courts my god.#four years of bullshit policy and shit we will have to spend years untangling just to get back to even thinking about making any progress
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SVT’s reaction to your first kiss
A/N: Whoops I took 6 years to write this,,, Thank you to my mutuals who pushed me to do this all those years ago 😂 Kept this all fluff!! Requests open btw ^^
Ft. gender-neutral!reader
Initiates the kiss first: S.Coups, Joshua, Jun, DK, Mingyu, The8, Dino
S.Coups
Wants the kiss to be perfect and overthinks it a bit because of that
Keeps staring at your lips in the moments leading up to it to the point where you call him out on it
…Which prompts him to finally go for it and lean in and kiss you
Holds your waist to keep you steady (thank goodness because your knees are weak all of a sudden)
Pulls back quickly, not wanting to overdo it, and checks that your reaction is good before kissing you again
Joshua
Is super romantic about it!
He’d def be the guy who waits to have your first kiss until he’s 100% sure you’re both ready
He plans to kiss you after a date and makes sure it’s in a good place!! It has to be an appropriate setting where there aren’t people around to gawk at you both
Asks you if he can kiss you when you’re sitting close to each other
Smiles as he pulls away, watching your reaction to make sure you liked it
Jun
Your first kiss happens before you’re even dating
You watch him kiss in his drama and joke that he looks like a bad kisser just to get on his nerves
He gets (playfully) upset with you like “excuseeee me? I’m a good kisser! I’ll kiss you to prove it!”
Acts out the kiss scene from his drama with you just to show you how good it is
Is all cocky afterward because you’re so flustered LMAO
DK
His first kiss with you is out of excitement! No planning whatsoever
One of you had just gotten some good news—I say one of you because it doesn’t matter who; either of you could have something good happen and he’d be equally ecstatic either way
You’re both jumping out of joy and he decides on a whim to grab your face and give you a big kiss
It’s dramatic and his eyes are in crescents as he smiles at you and your cute reaction
Hugs you tightly right after since he’s happy he got to kiss you
Mingyu
Would kiss you first unless you purposely try to beat him to it lmao
But most likely he kisses you first because every time you even think about kissing him, he makes himself taller to joke about it
As in, if he catches you both standing or sitting really close, he’ll say “heh. Seems like a perfect time to kiss” and puckers his lips before straightening his back so your faces aren’t that close anymore
So he totally catches you off guard when he says it again but actually kisses you this time
Slides his hand into your hair at the back of your head as he tries to deepen the kiss
The8
You get a little tipsy while drinking with him one evening and ask him to kiss you
He laughs and brushes it off at first, but later notices you keep staring at his lips longingly
Is a gentleman and asks you if you’d really like a kiss just to make sure you consent to it
Doesn’t kiss you unless he’s absolutely sure you’re just tipsy and not super drunk (he wants you to remember it)
It’s not necessarily deep, but it’s a long kiss; he wants to take his time with you
Dino
Wants to kiss you first and tries to be all suave about it
Is suspiciously nice to you beforehand to ensure you won’t reject him when he initiates it
Gets lost in your eyes right before he’s about to kiss you, which makes you realize what’s happening
Manages to man up enough to hold your chin and press his lips to yours
Gets gutsy and doesn’t pull away for a while, wanting to kiss you for as long as possible
Is kissed first: Jeonghan, Hoshi, Wonwoo, Woozi, Seungkwan, Vernon
Jeonghan
Your first kiss with him is unexpected for both of you lol
He is quite surprised when you turn his head to kiss him before he can leave from your date
You do it on impulse, so it’s short and he has no time to react during it
You stare at him after you pull away to see his reaction so he stares back at you in shock for a moment before a smile spreads on his face and he asks if you’d like another
Smiles against your lips :))
Hoshi
Blushes really hard before getting super excited
He’s been waiting for it!!!!
Gives you a lot of smaller pecks all over your face as he hugs you because he’s glad he finally can
He might kiss you deeply later, but honestly, he just wants to give you a lot of them first
Absolutely over the moon and brags about kissing you to the guys
Wonwoo
Has been meaning to kiss you for a little while, he just hasn’t found the right moment
So when you kiss him and interrupt him while he’s talking one evening, he freezes and doesn’t know how to react for a moment
Gets a little shy when you laugh at him about his reaction
But he quickly recovers and quietly pulls you in for another (longer) kiss
Thank goodness you’re in private right now because he doesn’t hold back now that you’ve started it!!
Woozi
Your first kiss with him is super casual
(In reality he’s trying to hide how flustered he is)
You’re leaving the studio and he tries to give you a hug goodbye when you gave him a quick kiss on the lips instead
He has kissed your head before, so you don’t really make this kiss a big deal
He smiles and gives you another kiss on the lips to really savour your lips before you leave
Seungkwan
Asks for a kiss in a joking way, not really expecting you to agree
His heart starts racing when you get close and hold his cheeks to give him a kiss
Has a bit of a loud reaction out of shock but ends up giggling about it as he holds your cheeks for another
Has that adorable blush on his face as you exchange kisses for a bit
Asks you for kisses all the time after that day
Vernon
Maybe I’m just projecting…I don’t think he would think about kisses much, so he’s flustered af when you do kiss him
His face goes beet red and he wants to hide when you suddenly kiss him while sort of in public
He liked it a little too much and has a silly reaction as he tries to brush off how embarrassed he is about his reaction
Pulls you into another kiss the moment you arrive at your place, saying he wants to redo it properly
Keeps your noses pressed together after and gives you a satisfied gummy smile
#seventeen reactions#svt reactions#seventeen imagines#svt imagines#seventeen fluff#seventeen scenarios#seventeen fanfic#jkj fics#.txt
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on the cusp of my inner child walking into the sunset to give my inner teenager a quick hive five and wave her into the matrix I will say that this used to be the song that I had looping in my head all the time today at the bunny store the owner was frustrated and I was hyperfocused on that energy whenever she was in the room like I expected her to tell me to get out or accuse me of something and then I heard the hum of my heart who wanted to give her something to be frustrated about and let me tell you I really do understand now why someone says proudly when their caretakers were mostly dysfunctional and lost "I raised myself" I raised my daughter and myself like I wished I had been raised like she and my soul were twins in a way so alike but also completely separate people now I recognize in my son where I may have misunderstood him especially with my autism and ADHD I did the best with what I knew but learning about how I process information and how I used to shut him down for things he couldn't help that I am now experiencing I'm only glad that I have time to be better I have time to bridge the distance that I know I feel and have created by not understanding and now that I understand I can do so much better my son and I are so alike and he has my eyes there's this gentle spirit to him he's so calm and quiet most of the time and even I project weird things that happen in my head onto him and he looks at me with such confusion when I do and I apologize profusely because I hate when that happens to me and I hate that I accidently do it to him a look that says "what the fuck? do you even know me?!" there's this furious spirit that shows up when anyone pushes him too far and buddy that spirit is going to win the last thing he wants is to be held when he's overstimulated and when he says he needs space alone he means it and when he's calmed himself he'll show up again and we'll talk when I fucked up and apologize I know he truly forgives me and I'm not used to being forgiven sometimes it felt like I was never forgiven but he trusts me and I know he knows I'm doing the best that I can but I'll still prove it to him that he's worth understanding and knowing not just being guessed at anyways, he's the better version of me he hasn't had to survive like me but he has had to endure the chronic misunderstanding and dissmissal of a way of experiencing and communicating to this world in a sensitive and interesting way he's teaching me what middle schoolers actually worry about when they aren't playing mortal hide and seek with dysfunctional family and it's help me understand myself a lot and where I've gone wrong sometimes but I'll fix it I'll fix it now it's time for me to meet who I was in high school and she doesn't want peace she wants justice and I need to learn how to blend all this together and keep some compromises and actually say what's on my heart even if someone tells me it's not real because I don't think I'm taking hostages anymore you're on the ship or you're walking the plank hope you can swim but here's a quick life preserver while you're in the water waiting for someone to float by her first idea would have been to burn the entire ship so like I said compromise I'm so tired lmao
can’t emphasize enough how when you grew up in a toxic environment, being in the room with someone who’s angry or frustrated - even if it has nothing to do with you - is absolutely terrifying cuz you’ve been 1000% conditioned to assume frustration = all hell is going to break lose and be aimed directly at you
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i recently went to my local ice hockey teams match who were playing against glasgow and now i’m thinking thoughts of ice hockey boyfriend!soap having to play against his girlfriends home team (and losing…sorry glasgow lmao…we won 5-3)
》 18+ for a little suggestive rambling
Him being all cocky like "I promise not to demolish your team too bad, bonnie. Hope you don't get upset when my team wins" accompanied with an arrogant wink.
It doesn't help that he's been on a winning streak either (like yes, you're proud of him, and you always give him some celebratory love afterwards, kissing his scrapes and bruises among other things) but he just had to go and fire you up, talking smack about your home team, so just this once are you going to root against your hockey player boyfriend.
He thinks it's cute. There's no way his team is going to lose. He says he'll soften the sting of defeat by eating you out later. Make you forget about the loss.
Imagine his surprise when your home team starts out strong and his team has to play catch up. Imagine the look on his face when his team loses and you're laughing at him all smug grins and obnoxious gloating. Meanwhile, he's still trying to catch his breath, red and huffy as adrenaline courses through his veins.
"What was that you were saying about 'not losing' and 'eating me out'?" You rag on him, too high on your team's win to realize you're poking the bear. "Something about 'softening the sting of defeat?'"
"Keep laughing, see where it gets you."
"What's that? I can't hear you over my team beating yours."
"Oh, yer gonna be gaggin' on it if you don't quit it, bon."
"Just like how your team choked up and kept fumbling the puck?"
"Gonna count to three if you don't haud yer wheesht."
"Why not up to five? That's what the winning team's score was."
"One."
"Or is it because you'd rather count the losing team's- sorry, your team's- score?"
"Two."
"Or are you tryna make yourself feel better about it?"
"Three. Let's go for a walk, love."
"Hey, have I ever shown you that 'I'm in danger' meme? Cuz, I think it's a perfect representation of what I'm feeling right now."
You know you're in no true danger, but he does drag you into the locker room to fuck your mouth. It's enough to soften the defeat and shut you up... for about a minute. And then you're going back to gloating again, not even caring about getting an orgasm yourself. For now, your team beating his is all the satisfaction you need.
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id be so annoying about the win, i wouldn't let him forget it
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