#Dad Bruce Wayne

[ryemiffie]

Quotes from my day as batfam incorrect quotes!

-After a fight between Bruce and Dick-

Bruce: What the hell are you doing up there?!

Dick, atop the grand chandelier: I left a tootsie roll up here 12 years ago and I want it back!

Bruce: You broke into the manor just for that?! You could literally just buy a whole new bag of tootsie rolls!

Dick: That's not the point, it's the principle!

[timmydraker]

Bruce, knowing Tim went out as RR when he was meant to be benched: do you have something to tell me, chum?

Tim, half asleep and drooling in his tea: sometimes Cassie and Kon make me curl into a ball and then use me as a baseball to play catch with while Bart stands in the middle and tries to catch me first.

Bruce: ….

Bruce: what.

Tim: they call me ‘piggy in the middle’

Bruce: …

Tim: somehow Bart never catches me but I think it’s only because he’s laughing so much.

Bruce, completely forgetting about Tim patrolling: I… I don’t know what to do with this information.

[finnoky]

Who can focus on expense reports when there’s after school gossip

[Dick: SO, Kelly said her and Hudson have been dating all year—

Bruce: Uh huh

Dick: — But Hudson asked Erin to sit next to him on the bus, AND her her hand —

Bruce: I see

Dick: — All while Kelly is near by and she just starts sobbing

Bruce: Sounds like Hudson’s a punk

Dick: HE IS!]

+ textless, also I suck at gossip ending

[arkangelo-7]

Jason Todd, in the thickest Jersey accent known to man: Hey, you piece of shit! Dat's my fuckin tire! Get the fuck offa me!

Bruce, tearing up behind the cowl: ...kid ya want a job?

[kaethefangirl]

bruce forces the batkids to go to his charity balls and he gives them suits and dresses for it- but he accidentally switches tim and Stephanie's outfits.

*Jason, Dick, and Duke huddled together looking at Tim and Stephanie walk into the ballroom*

Jason: They didn't.

Dick: They wouldn't

Duke: They did.

Stephanie: *wearing a black and red tux*

Tim: *holding her arm while wearing a bright purple dress, with heels*

Bruce: *sighs in tired dad*

[jade-e06]

little timmy and bruce!!

first time drawing him, and i’ve got to say that it’s really easy to make him an extremely tired dad

as for my opinion on bruce: he’s trying his best, but he’s so emotionally constipated that he messes up, a lot (i don’t really like focusing on bad dad bruce bc it makes me sad, but yeah a lot of the times he’s a total jackass) still i’d like to think he’s mostly good

[transmasculinizing]

[earlgreylatte]

𝖳𝗁𝖾 𝖫𝖺𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗇 𝖢𝖺𝗅𝗅𝖾𝖽 𝖭𝗈𝗐𝗁𝖾𝗋𝖾

(Platonic Hal Jordan & Reader, Platonic Bruce Wayne & Reader, Platonic Jason Todd & Reader, Eventual Kyle Rayner x Reader)

You’d say you were born with a pretty bad run of luck, growing up in a magic cult filled with people who were more than willing to forgo their own mortality, and yours. But when a glowing green ring whisks you away to space, you find that you prefer a cult run by smurfs much more than one by suicidal maniacs, child soldier recruitment aside. And you like Hal, even though he forces you to go to school and interact with people. He cares about you too, even if there is something weirdly familiar about you.

Or, where you learn to live and be a kid while a custody battle ensues between the corps and a certain Gotham vigilante.

Chapters:

tba

Extra:

tba

Masterlist

[oraclereadsandreviews]

something about bruce being so afraid of dick getting hurt that he ends up hurting him the most

web weave w/ snow angel by renee rapp

[blueberrymori]

☆warnings: FTM! reader, platonical content, teenage reader and older than Damian (reader is between 14-17 years old), dysphoria on the part of reader, reader depriving himself of sleep, Bruce being a good father, I don't use Y/N or variants of those in my fanfics then Bruce calls his son a little bat.

☆summary: when Bruce finds out that his son, is having a day of dysphoria, he plans an entire day to take care of his son.

☆A/N: I didn't really know how to finish this one, it was two in the morning when I wrote it.

Bruce had just returned from a patrol, it was late at night, he expected to see the whole mansion silent and unlit, but that's not what he found, Bruce came across his son in the kitchen barely keeping up, he was practically leaning against the kitchen counter barely waiting for the coffee machine to finish the coffee. 

-What are you doing here? This afternoon, are you still using the binder? - Bruce said worriedly as he realized you were still wearing the binder. He walked over to his son and put his hand on his shoulder. - Little bat, you're barely standing - Bruce said as he moved his hand to stroke your hair.

- I'm fine, Dad, I just need some more coffee - his tired voice betrayed him, and Bruce moved his hand to pull his head to his chest. - No, you don't need coffee, you need to sleep and take off that binder, it's going to affect your breathing and your ribs- Bruce said, hugging you and stroking your back.  Come on, I'll take you to rest- Bruce said without giving you time to answer as he led you into the bedroom and turned off the kitchen light.

-Dad, I'll be fine, I swear - his voice was tired and you couldn't even believe your own words, Bruce just hummed without believing you, he kept his hand on your back and followed the path to your room, when you got to the room Bruce stopped at the door.

-Go and get changed, I'll wait here to make sure you go to sleep - Bruce said, smiling slightly.-What are you going to take care of me as a child? - Bruce laughed lightly as he saw you enter the room and close the door behind you, he laughed and shook his head.

- You're never too old to let yourself be helped, little bat- Bruce said, leaning on the door, he looked at the decorations in the hallway, Bruce waited to hear your voice again, he felt the door open behind him and he stumbled a little before regaining his balance. - You could have warned me before opening the door, couldn't you, little bat?  Bruce said, laughing a little, but the smile soon faded when he saw that you were still in your binder.

-  Little bat, we've been over this, you can't wear it for more than eight hours, how long have you been wearing it?  Bruce's tone wasn't accusatory, no, he was just trying to keep his son healthy. -Okay, I'll go - Bruce cut him off. -No more of that little bat, you can't sleep with that on, take it off, take it off please - Bruce says in a firmer but still affectionate tone, leaving no room for argument, Bruce sees his look of protest and he pats him on the head. -  Please, little bat.  When he sees your nod, he closes the door and, to wait one more time, walks over to the painting.

-Ready - your voice made him go back to the door and open it, he saw you sitting on the bed. - What's wrong little bat, what's going on? Please tell me, you're my son, I want you to be all right- Bruce said, sitting down next to him, the bed heavy beside him.

- Dysphoria  - his voice made him move his hand to his hair. - So you tried to compensate for the dysphoria by overworking, sleep deprivation and kneading your ribs - Bruce says smiling at you even though he's much more worried than usual, when he sees you smiling nervously and smiles, he strokes your hair again and he pulls your head onto his shoulder. - What happened? Talk to me- Bruce asks gently again, to encourage you to speak.

- The clothes, when I wear them with sports tops, they show and when I was looking in the mirror it gave me a trigger...me - he sees you wince, Bruce sighs and kisses your forehead.

- I get it little bat, you should have told me or your brothers, I could have taken you to buy you some new clothes, your brothers could look after you and help you take your mind off it- Bruce says looking at you, he has a worried and caring look on his face, he strokes your cheek and kisses your forehead. 

- Little Bat, how about tomorrow we go out and buy some clothes for you, and spend a day as father and son, and please no overtime - Bruce says before getting up. - Come on, lie down, I'll cover you up - Bruce says, picking up the blanket from the foot of the bed.

-Thank you, Dad, I really do - Your voice makes him calm down, and he covers and kisses your cheek.

- Sleep well little bat- he says before turning off the light and leaving the room.

- Good night, Dad- he smiles as he closes the door,  Bruce was going to plan something to help you, you're his son and he refuses to leave his son feeling like that.

The other day you woke up to the knock on your bedroom door, when you opened the door Bruce had a smile on his face - good morning little bat - he says pulling you in for a hug, the hug catches you off guard, but soon your hands go to him to return the hug.

- Why are you so cheerful? The last time I saw you like this was when you took a week off from patrolling- Bruce laughed and I put my hand on his shoulder, starting to lead him out of the bedroom and into the kitchen.

- I've planned a father and son day, and we're going to start with breakfast, and then we can watch a movie or do something you like - Bruce says smiling, excited at the idea of spending a day with his son, it's been a long time since something like this has happened, he regrets that this is the result of a bad moment like a day of dysphoria that his son had to deal with alone but he's going to do his best to take care of it.

Bruce woke up early that morning because he wanted you to feel cared for and create a sense of trust so that if it happened again you would go to him instead of putting your health in danger.

Bruce made a point of not giving you coffee this morning, he asked Alfred to help him hide the powder and the coffee capsules, maybe later Tim would freak out when he didn't find his coffee capsules, but that would be a later subject.

-No coffee today, tea will be better for your body and mind - Bruce said as he poured the sachet of chamomile tea into a mug and added the hot water.

-Seriously? You're going to block my coffee? - Bruce laughed lightly and looked at you as he brought the mug of chamomile tea closer.

-Yes, you and Tim are going to run out of coffee today, it'll be good for your health - Bruce said, pouring himself some tea.

- Tim's going to freak out when he doesn't get his coffee, he'll give in to the energy drink and go back to the cases.  As you said this Bruce nodded, he saw you take a sip of tea and he smiled to himself.

Bruce waited for you to take your time eating, he wanted this to be a peaceful moment for you, he wanted to make sure you felt safe and protected.

[cuthwyn]

Bruce: *stirring his coffee with racoon eyes*

I have been tired for 15 years.

Dick: That's how long you've had me for!

Bruce:...

Bruce: Weird.

[ryemiffie]

I love imagining the scenario where one of Bruce's kids is getting married but no one knows Bruce's identity and it creates shenanigans. Like for example, Dick is marrying Starfire and she doesn't know Bruce's identity.

And they of course want Bruce at the wedding since he's Dick's dad, but they also want a hero as security due to the nature of the wedding, not only as a wedding between two heroes but also a Wayne wedding (not to mention holding a wedding like that in gotham is never easy) which is a pretty big deal in both respects and garners a lot of attention to be the perfect opportunity for a villian attack. So Starfire and Dick decide to request a justice league member there as security. Some heroes are eliminated due to them already being meant to attend as guests who are meant to be able to enjoy the wedding and some already have missions that need their attention, like Wonder Woman, Aquaman, and the Martian Manhunter are busy off-world, Shazam and HawkGirl are busy with a villian who's been on the run, and Superman is supposed to be doing press for the wedding as Clark, so they decide to give the task to Batman seeing as he's more than qualified and is already accustomed to the area (gotham), he can't figure out a way to decline the mission without risking his identity being leaked since he really has no reason to not be able to do it, except of course saying he has civilian business, on the day of the wedding, at the exact time of the wedding.. yeah hell no, Batman is way to paranoid to say something like that! So he agrees to do security as Batman for the wedding while also agreeing to attend the wedding as Bruce, ya' know, so people don't suspect anything about his identity due to the situation.

And before you ask yes Dick has realised the situation but no he is not helping Bruce out of it because its fucking funny to him, and none of the other batkids agree to where the suit for the day since they're also guests and they also find the situation funny as hell. So cue Bruce trying to constantly switch between making appearances as Bruce and doing security as Batman, like the classic sitcom episode where the person has to constantly switch between one date to the next, but it's Batman just trying to enjoy his kid's wedding.

[timmydraker]

Love the idea of Tim being the only one who can actually lie to Bruce, but have you considered Bruce who always knows Tim is lying and just… can’t get himself to do anything about it?

Hear me out, arguably these two are the most similar if you ignore certain concepts like being an orphan and (in most universes) seeing death at a young age. They are both raised in rich wealth in a big, lonely house (yes even with Alfred there he was still a teenage boy with no siblings or parents), both have critical thinking minds and insatiable curiosity and have reputations for being players and are both CEO’s and owners of massive companies.

So when Tim lies to Bruce, two things happen.

One, he can’t help but feel like a hypocrite because how many times did he lie to Alfred? Or even Dick and Clark? He’s still doing it! Bruce is a secret keeper and when you have someone who’s just as good at you at lying, in some ways better, it’s hard to feel confident in calling them out.

Two, he wants Tim to be more than him, to not be so bitter and lonely as he was because Tim had actual friends and half of his lies are for his friends or to spent time with them (even if that’s in the middle of a fight). When he sees Tim stare at him unflinching while he lies about stealing a bio weapon, all he sees is his little boy trying to cover that he was hanging out with his friends doing something naughty.

Bruce sees a cat giving him wide eyes and a little purr with claws still digging into his wrist and folds like a napkin.

He badly wants his son to be honest with him about things, but since he figures it out so quickly, he can convince himself Tim is telling him just in a… overly complicated and deceptive way!

When the others notice it drives them insane.

Then there’s the third reason, the one he can’t admit to himself, which is how guilty he feels for making Tim talk him out of suicide and murder at just thirteen years old.

The part of him that knows that Tim has still spent more time being a parent for Bruce than Bruce has for Tim.

The part of him that knows he’s failed all his kids, but he used Tim.

[jewelsli]

Not that I don’t love when Bruce’s kids outperform him and give him heart attacks, but I think it’s funnier when the kids think they are better fighters/spies/infiltrators/etc. then him but he’s just so proud so he lets them think that they are.

I think that Babs would be a really good hacker, the best in the family, but Tim, who thinks that he is the next best(and is still scarily good) has no idea that Bruce only let him think that he broke his record of hacking into secret organizations.

Dick is amazing at acrobatics, and centers his fighting style around it much more. He even won gold in the Olympics for gymnastics! Bruce doesn’t want to tell him that he trained under several gymnasts, contortionists, even ballerinas!!! and has the acrobatic fighting style mastered, so he (within reason) let’s his kid win on most occasions, he doesn’t need to fake loosing on trapeze though(I am still giving the kids SOME things they are better at…)

Cass knows that nobody can lie to her, she can spot everyone’s tells and knows most people better then they know themselves. Bruce is, however, extremely paranoid and also has a kryptonian he works with regularly. He lies so well that he can convince himself he’s telling the truth(which is literally the point in case of advanced lie detectors), and so what if he lets some of his tells be more obvious around his baby, he’s so proud of her for picking up such small things! And while Bruce is AMAZING at reading people, he can’t beat Cass, it is however much closer matched then the others think.

Let’s be honest, Bruce is banned from the kitchen and isn’t good at cooking… or so everyone thinks. While he’s not as good as Alfred or even Jason he could whip up something Gordon Ramsey would be proud of if he actually tried to.

Damian in the best fighter with swords, this is undisputed. Bruce just hopes none of his kids find his crate of custom katanas in the attic, if they do then he’ll say they are for Damian.

Tim is an amazing investigator, so good in fact, that Bruce has trusted him on his hardest cases. Everyone assumes this is because Tim is a better detective then Bruce, but he just loves seeing how proud his kid gets when he gets a breakthrough.

Batman doesn’t kill, Red hood does, everyone in their right minds knows that’s a lie. Before Robin came along, leaders of drug operations or terrorists would disappear into the night, never to be seen again. The only people who don’t seem to know this are the Bats children themselves. Sometimes you can still hear a cut off scream in the dark before the news announces a missing person that everyone just knew was doing something horrible, criminals are more wary on nights that the Bats brood are in. And people running trafficking rings pray that it’s the Hood when a knock sounds, the bat doesn’t give those people the mercy of death.

All of the bat kids know more languages then Bruce, and they keep learning more to throw him off, for a family of detectives they really should have thought about the fact that Bruce traveled the entire world, he knows ancient languages and the words that world in other galaxies use, if he could speak Martian then he would have learned it by now, he still does know that part that he’s able to learn.

Idk I just need more of Bruce being skilled at SO many things while his kids are like “oh yeah Bruce? He’s good but I could defeat him easily” and Bruce just so proud of his babies when they do ANYTHING.

Bonus:

Tim made a plan to neutralize Superman at some point, it wasn’t as good as Bruce’s but he replaced it so fast. When he later uses it to take down mind controlled or something Supes Red Robin is watching.

Nobody notices that Batman whispers something to Superman before he goes deathly pale and acts like the plan is working so well he immediately gets defeated. As for what Batman said to him? It was basically ‘Clark(they aren’t supposed to know identities here btw) my kid made this plan and I swear to every mortal and immortal force that if you don’t take the fall right now you will regret it for the rest of your life” and Batman was usually scary but this was like, God will cower before him terrifying and it scared evil Superman so much he went along with it.

Res Robin was smiling so brightly that later Clark honestly couldn’t be mad at the Bat.

Edit: I forgot to add this but unbeknownst to EVERYONE (including Alfred somehow) Bruce can and will stay awake longer then Tim and his drinks are somehow worse in terms of caffeination. The difference is that on the fourteenth day with no sleep everyone thinks it’s only been three even though he is Vividly hallucinating. The ability to hide his lack of sleep for the first week and a half leads them to believe he’s actually the worst at staying up since on what they think is his fourth day of no sleep (it’s his seventeenth) he’s talking to an apparently very vivid hallucination of Alfred the Cat in a suit and a Tiger named Tawny(he had met the tiger earlier that week) and having a civilized conversation with them

[arkangelo-7]

I love how Clark’s entire internal monologue in this scene appears to boil down to, “Don’t drop the baby. Do not drop the baby. Batman will kill you if you drop the baby.”

Source - Batman/Superman: World’s Finest

[kaethefangirl]

Bruce: *has the batkids lined up* Who did it? Tim: If this is about Damian's toothbrush, it was Jason's idea. Dick: You found it!? Stephanie you said he wouldn't find it! Damian: What did you do with my toothbrush, Drake. WHAT DID YOU DO??? Tim: *laughs* Stephanie: He couldn't have! Cass: *blinks* Jason: I live for chaos. Bruce: I was asking who drank the last of the milk and left an empty carton. The batkids: ... Duke: It was me.