#wen yao deserved better

[ionshi-teiru]

i left the room destroyed

to rage my love

[esoteric-oracle]

//long rambles ahead!

I think what really lingers with me about MDZS is that it's not a novel with a cathartic ending at all. It's a bittersweet story that leaves you slightly hollow. Yes, it's a beautiful and epic romance. It's a piece of social commentary interwoven with a love story and murder mystery. It's a cautionary tale. But it is also very much a tragedy. It's a story about being too late, second chances, and moving on.

By the time the truth of everything JGY and JGS did comes to light, it's 13 years too late. Everything that mattered has already happened. Jiang Yanli and Jin Zixuan are long dead. Jin Ling is still an orphan. Wen Ning is dead, and sometime in the future, his death will be permanent. Wen Qing was burned to death at the stake for no fault of her own. Nie Mingjue has already spent ten years in a no-doubt agonizing state of un-death, and Lan Xichen will have to bear the guilt of loving both Nie Mingjue and Jin Guangyao, and by doing so, forsaking them both. Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng's once-close bond is irrevocably broken, and the woman who sowed the seeds of resentment when they were still children will never face the consequences of her vitriol.

People sometimes say MXTX was too hard on the side characters, and only gave the Wangxian a happy ending, but what stuck with me after finishing the story is how… sad things are. Yes, Wangxian finally get the happy ending they've deserved for nearly 20 years - but at the same time, it's not a happy ending where the people who've wronged them get the consequences they deserve.

Wei Wuxian will spend the rest of his life haunted by guilt and loss, over what happened to Jiang Yanli and Jin Zixuan, over the loss of the Wen remnants. The rest of his years won't even be lived in the body his parents gave him.

Lan Wangji will spend the rest of his years wondering if he'd chosen to stand with Wei Wuxian when it mattered - would his son have had to grow up without his birth family?

Nie Huaisang is left wondering if his brother had been a little less trusting and had never taken Meng Yao in as a Nie deputy, would his brother have died a less wretched death? Would he have been forced to stoop to ruthless machinations and manipulations to seek some semblance of justice?

Wen Ning will have to live with the knowledge that if he'd been a little less kind, if he'd let Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng die that fateful day - his family would still be alive. The Wens would've won the war; Wen Qing might've even succeeded Wen Ruohan.

No one really gets the ending they deserve. MDZS isn't a story where good people get happy endings, and bad people get their dues. Sure, Jin Guangyao's crimes are revealed and he faces the consequences of his actions. But what about the people who stood by and made him into a monster? If anything, the side characters and antagonists who survive get better than they deserve. The real villain of MDZS - society - will never face retribution. Those cultivators who always believed in their own bigotry and righteousness over and over again, will never face justice.

Do you think those cultivators and the public will ever feel any regret for the innocent people they condemned to death in their own prejudice and blind self-righteousness? Do you think the people who gathered at Nightless City to call for Wei Wuxian's death considered for one second that he was the biggest reason they won the war? When the cultivators who sacked the Wen settlement at the Burial Mounds threw the bodies of the Wens into the blood pool, do you think that was a sign of shame?

Do you think Jiang Cheng will ever regret leading a siege on a small settlement of innocent farmers? Do you think he's haunted by condemning to death the same people whom he owes his life to?

Do you think those people like Yao-zongzhu will ever feel an ounce of remorse for so easily believing rumours and hearsay, and spreading speculation and vitriol about innocent people?

Do you think that unnamed cultivator out there will ever lose a single minute of sleep over smashing in Wen Popo's head?

In the years that follow, Wen Ning will have apologized a hundred times for lives he did not take, crimes he did not commit, because of the name he bears. People, both in-universe, and even readers, will condemn him for actions he could not help, for doing the right thing. But did Jiang Cheng ever apologize for killing his family? Did the Jins ever apologize for their horrific treatment of people in the labour camps?

People will continue to demand that Wei Wuxian apologize for causing the deaths of their friends and family. But how is Wei Wuxian meant to do that? No one ever apologized to him for taking his family away. No one ever apologized for condemning the Wen Remnants to death for crimes they took no part in. The Wens were his family too.

There's so much potential for bitterness and corruption in MDZS. Instead of saving everyone, Wei Wuxian could've stood aside and let the people who tried to kill him die. MDZS could've been a story of succumbing to hatred and grief, but it wasn't. MXTX could've gone on and on about how society wronged the protagonist, but she didn't. The narrative is one of forgiveness and moving beyond past grievances. The story chose to close the story on a positive note. I truly love that aspect of MDZS, where MXTX leaves just enough room for hope and love at the end.

A-Yuan will finally get his closure about the family he lost as a toddler. Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian get their happy ending together after being separated by nearly two decades by war, miscommunication, cruelty, and death.

Wei Wuxian will never regret protecting survivors of an attempted genocide, because it was the right thing to do.

And Wen Ning will still stand in the way and take a fatal blow meant for Jin Ling, despite everything the Jins and Jiang Cheng did to the people he loved.

Because they chose love. Characters like Wei Wuxian and Wen Ning and Lan Wangji have the chance to move on and live a happier life because when they could've succumbed to hurt and fury and resentment, they chose to be kind and do the right thing. Wangxian get their happy ending because they learn to recognize the toxicity of the cultivation society's self-cannibalizing prejudice, and chose to pursue righteousness above personal benefit.

MDZS isn't a story about good people getting good things. Just look at what happened to Xiao Xingchen. There's really nothing satisfying or cathartic about everyone's fates at all. There's no promise about society facing the consequences of their mob mentality or Wangxian actually changing the world together. Even in TGCF, for all its makings of a love story, we get the promise of societal change once Jun Wu is deposed.

It has all the makings to be a tragedy or tale of vengeance of epic proportions - but instead, it's a love story. It's a story about making the best of what you've got, and staying true to yourself and your morals, even if that's sometimes a bitter pill to swallow. It's a story where everything that could go wrong went wrong, but the characters still managed to fight their way to a better ending by choosing kindness. At its core, MDZS is a testament to choosing compassion over cruelty no matter how tragic and hopeless life gets, no matter how long the journey gets. Even though the happy ending is more personal and only applies to the specific characters, even though we don't actually get the promise of their society becoming a better place - we still have the hope that Wei Wuxian's second chance brings. The hope that sometimes, no matter how cruel the world is, some people who deserve it still get their happy endings. That's what makes MDZS such a memorable work of art. That's why it stays with you.

[red-garden]

When will we, as a society, understand that Jin Guangyao’s story is about survival and the things he had to do to make it, rather than one super evil guy just trying to be awful and kill people? We can look past Wei Wuxian torturing and killing nameless Wen soldiers because we’re not attached to them and they’re Wens. That gets to be justified because it’s the bloody revenge of the protagonist on henchman #362. We can look past his desecration of the dead, his raising of fallen soldiers to tear apart their brothers in arms, because they’re the baddies. We look past him deserting Jiang Cheng after his return because he had people to protect and Jiang Cheng is an asshole (affectionate). Don’t misconstrue me- I love Wei Wuxian, and I think that he is a basically good person that was pushed past his breaking point and did some truly awful things as a result. He’s not a bad person. But he’s not better than Meng Yao.

Walk with me, Jin Guangyao antis. Let’s recount every bad thing Jin Guangyao has ever done in chronological order.

1) killed Nie Mingjue’s general

2) got Su She to cast the 100 holes curse on Jin Zixun (possibly to frame Wei Wuxian)

3) advocated for and later worked with Xue Yang

4) killed Nie Mingjue

5) banged his sister before he knew they were siblings, later married her after knowing

6) everything about Jin Guangshan’s death

7) allegedly killed his own son

8) chopping nie Mingjue up into little pieces and keeping his head in a cupboard

9) putting all the juniors in The Zombie Cave to get everyone on Wei Wuxian’s ass and kill a lot of people

10) almost killing Jin Ling

Numero uno first ever Bad Meng Yao Deed was killing Nie Mingjue’s general. You know, the general that constantly belittled him and repeatedly insulted his mom. Not only is this one totally understandable, it was also filial.

Next the 100 holes curse. There’s not solid proof that he wanted to frame WWX for this, it’s more likely this was just a better hidden filial killing in the name of his mother’s honor that ended up negatively impacting WWX.

Xue Yang is a little freak, but he’s a powerful, smart little freak. He was to protect Xue Yang in the interest of his father, although he does keep working with him after JGS’s death. This one was a power grab, trying to have extra pieces on the board to ensure his position among the Jin.

Nie Mingjue was another filial killing. If there’s one thing Meng Yao is gonna do is always be filial to his mom. Additionally, Nie Mingjue was not a perfect innocent angel either, he supported killing the Wen remnants. This wasn’t Meng Yao killing the last unicorn y’all. AND AND ALSO ALSO Jin Guangshan ordered this!!!!!!!!!! He was obeying his father to maintain his social position!!!!!!! What’s not clicking?

I get really mad over the Qin Su stuff, because marrying her after she was already pregnant was the kindest thing he could do for her. Should he have told her they were siblings and let her make her own choice? Absolutely. But he was trying protect her, and I can’t fault him for that. (Call back the nonconsensual golden core transfer)

The only thing I won’t defend is how he killed JGS. JGS was world’s worst guy, but no one deserves to be raped under any conditions. The sex workers he hired didn’t deserve to die, they didn’t deserve any of that. One thing I will say is that he didn’t plan for Sisi to be there. She had been transferred, he didn’t expect her, and after the fact he fed and clothed and kept her comfortable for the rest of her life. Keeping her under house arrest was how he protected his social position. Psychologically speaking I understand why he killed JGS like this however. While jiggy loved his mom, it’s clear he didn’t love sex workers more broadly, and saw his mom as an exception among them. He didn’t see the sex workers he killed as people, only saving Sisi because she was another supposed exception. For JGS, this was a taste of his own medicine type beat. JGS is a rapist, who raped Qin Su’s mom and jiggy’s mom when she was 15. I completely understand why he chose to kill JGS this way, but that doesn’t make it okay.

Jin Rusong’s death is completely alleged. While it ended up being politically advantageous to jiggy to squash the smaller sects that plotted against him, we have no idea if he killed his son. While he does say he does, he also says he killed Qin Su, who killed herself. While he may feel responsible for both their deaths, that doesn’t mean he killed them. I should point out the one claiming he killed his son was Sect Leader Yao, you know, the mob mentality character.

Chopping Nie Mingjue up is just common sense. Harder for a fierce corpse to kill you if it’s just a head. Harder to identify a body if it’s just a leg. “This is desecrating the dead” AND WHAT WAS WEI WUXIAN DOING, RIDDLE ME THAT BATMAN

For the juniors, this one was just poorly thought out tbh. He needed the Jianghu to get WWX’s ass because he was going to uproot him from his comfortable life. So he harmlessly leaves all the kids in a cave, gets everyone out there, gets their energy sealed, and lets people point fingers at WWX when the zombies start coming. He knows this likely would result in the deaths of many cultivators- many cultivators who need I remind you, make up the bourgeois, talk nasty about his mom, and who supported killing the Wen Remnants. This was like the ocean gate of wuxia, but y’all aren’t ready for that. He was protecting the life he worked so hard for, plain and simple 

Okay there are two things I won’t defend. While I don’t think he would’ve taking JL’s life, I can’t imagine how traumatic that was for Jin Ling. BUT AGAIN, I understand why he did it. He was grasping at straws, clinging to anything he thought might keep him alive, and he did a desperate, shitty thing. If you want to believe he never loved Jin Ling because of this moment, be my guest, but if there’s one thing jiggy can do is love.

All in all, he did a lot of desperate, shitty things to claw his way to a better life, and a lot of desperate shitty things to keep it. If you think he shouldn’t have cared so much about being part of the Jianghu, CONGRATULATIONS, YOU MISSED THE POINT !!🎉🎊 Poverty is violence, and he grew up in it. It was his mother’s wish, what she broke herself doing, to give him a better life. He was a good son, not going to squander what his mother gave him, trying to protect his very precarious position in a society that hated him for the fact of being born wrong. He’s not a moral paragon, but no one in mdzs is. They’re all people that react in deeply human ways to deeply unfair situations. They lash out, commit violence, do things they regret. Jiggy did a lot of terrible things, but the point is that he shouldn’t have had to.

[rayan12sworld]

💙🧡Wish I could forget the taste of your skin and the feel of your hands pinning me down

By:KizuKatana

Summary:

Wei Wuxian would like to think that - if he had known that Lan Wangji would walk out of his life immediately after they hooked up- he wouldn’t have given into his ridiculous attraction for the man. He wished he were better at lying to himself.

Guest-starring Lan Wangji’s canonically poor communication choices after romantic cave encounters

Chapter:10/10

Words:63,215

Status:completed

“I don’t work with major sects. Especially not the Lan.”

~~

He had to see Wei Ying, to make sure he was okay. He hadn’t been allowed to see Wei Ying six years ago, and the man had nearly died. Would have died if Wen Qing hadn't randomly happened to be interviewing at Gusu hospital that same day. It was unacceptable that a sheer coincidence was the only reason Wei Ying was still alive. The company Lan Wangji’s family owned had put Wei Ying at risk, then abandoned him. Someone in his family’s company had made the decision to fire Wei Ying without notice, which violated company policy. Someone in his family’s company had further made the decision to pull medical support over a policy that was clearly not meant to be used in this way. Lan Wangji was going to find this ‘ someone .’ And when he did… Lan Wangji cut himself off at the shocking violent images that flickered through his normally peaceful mind. There was precedent for such punishments. Though much of his ancestor’s history had been burned, enough survived to make it clear that Lan discipline had always been harsh. In the modern context, he knew such measures would be viewed as archaic… even barbaric. But cultivators were given leeway by the authorities and society at large to handle their own business. Lan Wangji felt a primal sort of anger and thirst for vengeance that - for the first time in his life - made him fiercely glad that there would be no boundaries to stay his hand if he found the one responsible for Wei Ying’s treatment.

~~

“You never told me that you and Hanguang-Jun had been romantically involved.” Wei Wuxian choked on his in-drawn breath, which sent him into a coughing fit that lasted almost a minute. “What?!” He wheezed, when he could finally form words again. “Why would you think… it was only… we weren’t romantically involved. Fuck, who says shit like that?” Wen Qing eyed him skeptically. “If you’re trying to play this off cool, you are failing spectacularly. Though that’s nothing new.”

~~

Lan Xichen shot him a sideways glance, and continued to scroll. “Wangji…,” Lan Xichen said after several more pages of scrolling. “Did you have time to do anything other than follow Wei Wuxian around and document his actions?” Lan Wangji felt his ears heat as report after report with his signature flashed across the screen. He had, perhaps, not realized that there were so many reports he had written about Wei Ying. “I was the Compliance officer,” Lan Wangji replied tersely. “Mn,” Lan Xichen said, an unforgivable smirk appearing on his face. “You wrote him up for wearing too few layers on a night hunt after being covered in Yao viscera and changing into civilian attire?” Lan Wangji clenched his jaw. Wei Ying had been wearing only shorts and a tee-shirt. It had been a professional trip. It had been… distracting. “You know that most people don’t flirt by giving citations of minor rule violations to the person they are interested in, right?” Lan Xichen persisted, openly laughing at him, even if it was only with his eyes. “ Ge ,” Lan Wangji said repressively, which only served to amuse Lan Xichen more.

~~

He also really wanted to run his sword through Su She, metaphorically. And also literally. His hand flexed around the cool, smooth hilt of Bichen. He trusted his brother, but Lan Xichen was kind. Su She did not deserve kindness. “Please trust me, Wangji,” Lan Xichen pleaded, as if reading his brother’s thoughts. “Su She must face discipline. According to the sect rules, not civilian laws,” Lan Wangji stated. He would not bend on this.

[k-l-ng]

Pre-Exams Days me : realizes that nothing and nobody is stopping me from word-vomiting my love for Lan Sizhui. 

Like, look at him. He’s gentle, thoughtful and resourceful. He’s handsomely pretty.  He’s Baby but reliable. He’s adorable but cool.

In one non-existent mdzs fanfic I would have him go on an investigation with his friends (bcz Friendship is Wholesome). Also I could ship him with anyone but that’s another story. If I were a bit mean he would have to face some life-threatening menace and get out of it injured but victorious, because that’s usually the fate of my fav characters (sorry). He’ll be cared for though, by his friends of course and Wangxian who are basically his parents.

I would have him explore his relationship with Jin Ling (best friend slash cousin). They could support each other as they face their new responsibilities as Sect Leader and Sect Heir. They would sometimes meet up at Lotus Pier, and yeah Yunmeng-bros reconciliation is happening. Jiang Cheng deserves better, much love to him, and I’m sure he’ll get along well with Sizhui.

Jiang Cheng : * proud * ah yes, my nephew who is sensible. I’m sure he’ll take care of my nephew who is not sensible. 

(Cue Lan Sizhui acting self-sacrificing because yeah, he’s Wei Wuxian’s son alright. Jiang Cheng decides that both his nephews need their legs broken.

Jin Ling : Why am I included-)

I could give Sizhui an adventure involving only him and Jingyi, his childhood best friend, because they’re just adorable together and so loyal, literally ride-or-die for each other.

I could have some junior disciples(/villager) have a crush on Head Disciple(/Peerless Cultivator) Lan Sizhui because, again, look at him. 

Me reading MDZS for the first time : Who’s he and why is he so perfect ? (Let me tell you if I were there, a fanclub would definitely exist.)

What about a competition between Sects ? He would end up first when it comes to musical techniques and archery at least. (Sorry I make the rule. Also I believe Wen Ning is a good teacher.)

In another non-existent mdzs fanfic, an original character would want to court him (listen, outsider pov is sexy). Watch him win hearts even as his Wen heritage is discovered. Watch him grow and become even more settled, confident in his own abilities. This other talented new Yao Head Disciple threatening his position as the most eligible bachelor discovered his secret ? One dangerous joint Lan-Yao nighthunt later, that dude would promise him protection if he ever were persecuted for the blood coursing through his veins.

[rosethornewrites]

T & G reading since 7/25

Finished

Teen:

Fact Check (出面辟谣, 以正视听), by dragongirlG (🔒)

出面辟谣, 以正视听: to come forth and refute rumors so that the truth may be revealed

In an effort to preserve Wei Wuxian's reputation, Lan Wangji writes pointed reviews of shoddy cultivation tools which use the Yiling Laozu's name for marketing.

Written for Bearer of Light: a Lan Wangji fanzine.

A tapestry of us, by jalpari

Lan Wangji and Sizhui, through different eyes over the years.

Good Fortune Lies Within Bad, by ereshai

Whatever had happened must have been recent - the child, who they had discovered crying all alone outside the house, was scared and probably hungry, but otherwise unhurt.

Crimson leaves, by barisan (3 chapters)

There is a world where Wei Wuxian could not take another word of slander towards a mother whose smile he couldn’t even remember, a father whose embrace he couldn’t recall the warmth of.

A world where he could not take another beating, another misplaced punishment, another thoughtless insult.

Perhaps he grows tired of fooling himself into thinking that he has a place in Lotus Pier.

That he belongs.

That he is wanted.

Loved.

A Better Lie, by nirejseki

Wait.

This wasn't the Lan sect, with all its strict rules and stricter morality.

This was the Nie.

(Meng Yao identifies an opportunity.)

Descent, by nirejseki

Lan Qiren was old. Lan Qiren was tired.

General:

tiny gentians, by humancorn

Lan Wangji scolds five year old Wei Wuxian and deals with the consequences.

Taking Responsibility, by bavariansugarcookie

Lan Zhan is doing his best to ignore Wei Ying while he's supervising Wei Ying's punishment in the library - but even Lan Zhan's patience isn't infinite.

Or what would happen if Lan Zhan kissed Wei Ying in the Gusu Lan library.

Unfinished

Teen:

A Fire in Your Heart, by Whichie

Cangse Sanren was wild and untamable, playfull and carefree, a kitsune down to her very core. Her son was no different.

Wei Wuxian was not meant to be caged, but when Madam Yu locked his kitsune nature inside himself, he found out quickly that the world will never want someone like him. Better to hide away. Better to pretend to be a normal human than face the consequences of being a fox spirit among cultivators trained to take you out.

That is, until he goes to Gusulan for the lectures, and finds someone who sees past every twisted chain.

A Songbird at Dawn, by mondengel (🔒)

At a discussion conference, Wen Ruohan discovers something he hadn't known he'd lost. As it happens, being a grandfather suits him rather well.

General:

but I figured it out, then made my way back, by MichelleFeather

It was an extreme, a desperate decision fueled by anger towards the entire cultivation world, a grief deeper than the deepest trenches in the ocean. The realization that Lan Wangji would now have to continue on living a second time without his beloved, where Wei Wuxian had died once again. Where, once more, his love had been taken from him by cruel, unrighteous men who thought they knew better, that they were doing the world a justice.

Lan Qiren had seen the state that his nephew had been in after Wei Wuxian’s first death, what Lan Wangji had done in his grief then, and he feared what Lan Wangji would do to himself if he was left alone with this repeated grief.

I Have Arranged to Tie You to Me, by xxxMiaHikarixxx

Lan Wangji is bedridden after receiving the thirty-three strikes as his punishment. He has just been informed of Wei Ying's death. He is convinced he'll never see his beloved again and his soul mourns the loss of him. But something happens in the Jingshi that forces Lan Wangji back to the past, almost three years before Wei Ying visits Cloud Recesses. Lan Wangji is determined to change the past and make sure his beloved is safe and treated with the respect he deserves this time.

[i-will-cry-you-a-river]

It wasn't like he was entirely fake. He was basically an omega, the only thing he couldn't do was to release and smell the pheromones, but who cared about that, right? He was way prettier than any omega he had ever met, he was good at staying home and being a gorgeous little eye candy, and he could even get pregnant if needed. Sure, he didn't want to get pregnant, but he could, even without being in heat, and that was the important part.

So, him, being sold to Lan Xichen as the perfect omega wife, was not-

It was fake as hell.

And now he was going to have to break the trust of the only other person he adored other than Nie Mingjue, something he never wanted to.

But how the hell he could have foreseen that it would be Lan Xichen who would buy him?! The softest, gentlest, sweetest and kindest alpha ever, who deserved the best omega wife ever, instead of the lying fake younger brother of his best friend.

"It's okay A-Sang. Xichen-ge is going to take a good care of you," Lan Xichen promised, caressing his hair as the car drove them through the city. Nie Huaisang was curled up in his lap, seeking out the warmth he had no right to feel and the lovely smell even his inferior nose could differentiate, and he sighed contently.

"Of course you will," he murmured half as an elated agreement and half as a sarcastic retort. Because Lan Xichen would do anything for his pretty omega wife he just brought for an obscene amount of money, especially when that omega wife was the supposedly kidnapped brother of his best friend.

Nie Huaisang was born as a beta. He was not the typical Nie, strong and obviously alpha even before the presentation. But, he could have been an omega. He was always sickly, loved arts and lazing around like a pretty housewife, and before the age of the presentation, he knew that was going to be his life goal: to be a pampered, prized omega of somebody who loved and adored him, somebody who would take care of him at least as good as his Da-ge did.

But he never presented.

And his dreams of becoming the trophy omega wife of a rich, adoring alpha husband was gone-

Until Nie Mingjue. Well, until Meng Yao, but that's basically the same thing. His Da-ge's lover and assistant - and, honestly, brain and better yet overall much worse half - decided they needed money for their feud with the Wens.

The Plan was to "kidnap" and "sell" Nie Huaisang to the highest bidder, and save him just after the transaction and before he could leave with his "new owner". It would have been easy. Meng Yao and Nie Huaisang were a terrifying and efficient team, it would have been an effortless task for them.

What they didn't count on was Lan Xichen and his annoyingly honorable self.

Nobody counted on that the man would want to help Nie Mingjue's "search" for his didi when he had other things to worry about. (Like his own didi and his omega not-wife.) Nor that he would actually find Nie Huaisang. And especially not that he would literally make Nie Huaisang the world's most expensive omega with his relentless pursuit to be the one who could buy Nie Huaisang and take him home.

That man was unreal.

And now that unreal, ridiculous, amazing, honorable and kind man was his alpha.

"Xichen-ge," he started, "why did you-?"

"Because..." Lan Xichen hesitated, his hand stopping its soothing motions. The fake omega whined, bumping his head into the gentle hand until the fingers returned to their soft scratches.

"So unreasonable," Nie Huaisang teased with a tiny giggle, but it really was unreasonable. He could have left him there. He could have called Da-ge. He could have done anything except for buying a useless, fake omega. (Well, he didn't know that part, but he didn't need to buy an omega! He was The Lan Alpha!)

"Being reasonable didn't get me were I wanted so far." He smiled, but it was something different from his usual ones. It was- darker, somehow. His smiles were always so neutrally pleasant, so pretty and empty, but that one... That one made Nie Huaisang's world shift and his heart beat faster.

"And being unreasonable did?"

The fingers tightened, lightly pulling on Nie Huaisang's hair, just enough it could be felt. "I have you now, don't I?"

Nie Huaisang's breath hitched and he swallowed back his moan. Lan Xichen as a dangerous individual was just too attractive for a pretty little beta like him to handle.

(This fic was brought to you by this post. I just had to.)

[eleanorfenyxwrites]

Open Up And Let Me In

The Waves Are Rising and Rising Extra Scene #5

Chapter 2

Even more NieYao arguing and obsessing over each other - just what the doctor ordered 😌

--//--

Nie Mingjue has nearly dozed off despite his awareness of his partner’s tension by the time Jin Guangyao takes a sharp breath in and opens his mouth as if to speak. When he finally manages to voice what he’s thinking, it’s with a quiet, perhaps slightly self-conscious murmur that makes Nie Mingjue’s heart ache in his chest.

“I used to think of you when I was in Qishan. Er-ge too, of course, it was inevitable considering I’d just parted from him once he was ready to join you at the front, but Wen Ruohan didn’t know that part. He would ask me what I used to do for you, usually while overseeing the things he would have me do for him. It was a torment, and he knew it.”

Nie Mingjue unclenches his jaw with a supreme effort. He doesn’t need it spelled out for him to know that Jin Guangyao means the things he would do for Wen Ruohan in the Fire Palace.

“You don’t know what it’s like,” Jin Guangyao whispers into his collarbones, “to do unspeakable things you know those you love will despise you for, but to do them anyway because they must be done for a higher purpose. It was war, I needed to survive, I needed him to trust me. And then I killed him, and the war was over and I still needed to survive, I needed my father to trust me, I needed…”

Nie Mingjue ducks his chin to press his lips to Jin Guangyao’s hair, breathing slowly through the anger burning in his chest that he knows will do nothing to help.

“I asked your brother if you were alright,” he confesses when he’s got a better grip on himself, “during the campaign. I couldn’t find you but I…I already missed you like a severed limb.” Jin Guangyao’s breath hitches and Nie Mingjue adds, “It’s never gotten any better,” before he can reply.

Jin Guangyao starts counting his breaths again and Nie Mingjue counts them in his mind as well, running his hand in circuits up and down his partner’s bare back in time with them to help keep him steady. It’s not even remotely close to the confession he knows Jin Guangyao deserves, it’s barely scratching the surface of the things he’s been keeping locked tightly in his chest, behind his teeth, for years now. But if Jin Guangyao is so affected by such a small glimpse of his feelings then he should probably keep the rest to himself for now (Lan Xichen would certainly think so, at least, and he’s not not keeping Lan Xichen’s ideas in mind for how to fix this rift between them).

“A limb you severed,” Jin Guangyao finally mutters, mutinous and tear-thick. “I didn’t want to go, and I’m tired of arguing about this Mingjue!”

Nie Mingjue doesn’t protest the fist that bangs on his ribs a few times in quick succession (hard enough to know Jin Guangyao means it, not so hard that it’ll bruise), he just huddles a little more firmly around Jin Guangyao and tries to stop his own eyes from smarting in automatic sympathy — and frustration.

“You think I don’t know that? I’m sorry, A-Yao, I didn’t want to send you away any more than you wanted to go, but there are– there are rules, there’s a- a code of honor! How can I expect my men to keep it if I won’t?!”

“Honor,” Jin Guangyao scoffs. Nie Mingjue reluctantly loosens his grip to let Jin Guangyao bully his way free and sit up, presenting Nie Mingjue with his back and the tangled fall of his hair as he scrubs at his eyes in relative privacy. His narrow shoulders flex with the movement, bone and muscle still far too visible under his pale (wonderfully unbruised) skin for Nie Mingue’s liking. “Honor — the things I’ve seen men do for the sake of their honor would make you despair for the world before I’d gone through the smallest portion of the list. You did it because you were angry with me, and you refused to reverse the decision for the sake of your pride. Not honor — pride, Mingjue, there is a distinct difference!”

Nie Mingjue turns onto his back and covers his face with both hands, unsubtly scrubbing at his own eyes as Jin Guangyao had done, and for the same reason. He’s always hated that he cries when he’s angry like this — when he’s not just angry but hurt as well, when he’s upset, when he sees no way out of the tangled web of emotions that humans insist on wrapping themselves in. The saber spirits cleave through all of it as easily as they do diseased and poisoned flesh, they leave no room for interpretation or compromise, and it’s so gloriously freeing in the years of working in harmony before the human spirit succumbs to the blind rage. 

“I was angry with you,” he allows, white-knuckling his roiling emotions to avoid a fight they won’t be able to recover from when they’re both so fragile. “I am, but it’s— I can’t separate it anymore from loving you. I don’t know how to ignore it but I can’t stand to be apart from you, I have to keep you close enough to cut me open and-”

Nie Mingjue chokes on nothing but the strength of his emotions, his thoughts, and when he sits bolt upright Jin Guangyao is already there, twisted up onto his knees next to Mingjue’s hip, turned to face him so he can watch him with wary fascination in those wide eyes.

“You-”

“What, Mingjue?” Jin Guangyao asks like he already knows where this is going, like he’s daring him to say it anyway. Nie Mingjue’s mouth opens and closes a few times uselessly, helplessly, and Jin Guangyao lets him flounder for a few too many beats for comfort before he takes pity on him for the second time tonight and says for him what Nie Mingjue finds he can’t choke out.

“Will you force me to make the comparison for you?” he asks, soft as a silk scarf around his neck ready to be pulled taut. Nie Mingjue swallows thickly as Jin Guangyao drops his gaze to his chest, studying the featherlight brush of his own fingertip against some of the scars littering his skin, injuries too numerous or too superficial to bother using his qi to heal properly while on the battlefield. “Have you traded one blade for another, hm? In the absence of letting Baxia tear you apart from the inside out, are you asking me to do it instead?”

He wants to protest. It’s not the same, and he knows that, but he hadn’t lied either. Keeping Jin Guangyao in his heart, in his bed, feels like sleeping with an assassin’s knife cradled in his hands, the tip of it pressed against his chest, any quick, unconsidered movement inherently dangerous.

Jin Guangyao slowly slides over to straddle his lap and lifts his gaze again; something tugs low in Nie Mingjue’s gut and his hands squeeze Jin Guangyao’s hips hard enough to make him flinch, the smallest twitch in his brows and at the corners of his mouth.

“I don’t hate the idea, ruining you myself. I told you — I don’t care what we do, only stay near me,” he whispers. In this position there’s no way he doesn’t feel what it does to Nie Mingue, but unlike that night Jin Guangyao had sat in his lap and teased him for it, all he does now is settle his weight more firmly against him and grind down ever so slightly, potentially subtle enough to brush off as an accident save for the ravenous heat in his gaze.

“I think even if you died I wouldn’t be able to let you go,” he continues like it’s a confession and Nie Mingjue can barely hear him through the blood rushing in his ears. “Even if I did it myself, with my own hands, I don’t think I could bring myself to leave you. I never wanted to, and I still don’t, even when I’m afraid.”

Any hope of coherent speech is long gone. Nie Mingjue slides his hands up to Jin Guangyao’s waist, a too hard drag of palms and fingertips digging into that tiniest hint of softness around his middle. Jin Guangyao gasps, nearly inaudible and not even close to a full breath, a short sharp dagger of an inhale.

“You can’t leave either,” Jin Guangyao says when he’s recovered, his eyes burning with the ferocity of knowing he’s right. He’s intoxicating like this and Nie Mingjue can’t find any reason at all to complain about it. “You won’t, because you can’t. You have to keep me close, why bother pretending otherwise? Aren’t you so obsessed with honesty anyway, can’t you just be honest with yourself?”

This resolves nothing. This fixes nothing at all, really, not in the way that Lan Xichen had told him to, but in the absence of resolution he can accept mutually assured destruction.

Jin Guangyao gasps again when Nie Mingjue bears him down into the rumpled covers and decides he’s just going to show him. Talking was Lan Xichen’s idea and while Nie Mingjue is sure he meant well — while he’s sure it would work for Lan Xichen — the fact of the matter is that Nie Mingjue was doomed from the start. This is never going to work if he only ever takes Lan Xichen’s advice, if his relationship to Jin Guangyao is entirely filtered through Lan Xichen’s tempering presence. He has to prove that this can work between the two of them alone as well as amongst the three of them, he has to prove that he knows Jin Guangyao in a way that even Lan Xichen doesn’t, and Lan Xichen would never sanction what he wants to do, but-

“Fuck-” Jin Guangyao gasps, his nails sharp in the planes of Nie Mingjue’s back “-Mingjue yes-”

-Lan Xichen isn’t here, and Jin Guangyao is straining to meet him kiss for kiss and bite for bite as Nie Mingjue tries to bruise the strength of his need straight into his lover’s skin. Later, he thinks, he’ll be upset to find bruises shaped like hard hands on Jin Guangyao’s healing body and remember that this time he was the only one to put them there. That’s slightly difficult to keep in mind, though, when Jin Guangyao is egging him on with grasping hands and his legs crushing tightly around his hips to drag him in closer, always closer, pleading with words and actions both for Nie Mingjue to be rough with him.

He’s surprised neither of them rip anything when Jin Guangyao realizes Nie Mingjue never took off his trousers and tries to shove them off with brute force, only managing it when Nie Mingjue squeezes a hand between the crush of their bodies to untie the knot at his hip at least enough to loosen the waistband and let Jin Guangyao use both hands and feet to strip him. He’s equally surprised that he doesn’t break anything when Jin Guangyao tells him where his new pot of oil is and he twists to fetch it from its tray beside the bed as quickly as he can with Jin Guangyao still determined to hold him close with every wiry limb.

There’s no discussion again of who’s doing what, and why they’re doing it. Jin Guangyao simply relaxes his legs enough, finally, to let Nie Mingjue actually get a hand between his thighs and then he’s gripping Nie Mingjue’s forearm hard enough to leave crescent-moon divots in little overlapping lines as he struggles to maintain a bruising grip on him. Nie Mingjue ignores his anxious scrabbling in favor of fingering him open with a brutal sort of efficiency he can tell (he knows) they both need tonight, like this. He doesn’t even pause when he decides Jin Guangyao can take a second finger, and a third, and he doesn’t even care that he can’t do anything more elaborate than hard thrusting in and out — Jin Guangyao’s unself-conscious moaning as he rolls his hips and tugs at his arm to try to help Nie Mingjue fingerfuck him a little deeper is more than enough encouragement.

It’s all too easy to be swept up in the urgency of it, the need, and he fully intends on continuing to do so. He is, in fact, desperately ready to do so considering he’s been hard since before he got his mouth on Jin Guangyao and it’s seriously starting to hurt at this point. He’s apparently not the only one eager to continue exactly in the same vein as Jin Guangyao blinks up at him, pouting hazily, when he freezes in spite of that need, both hands curled under Jin Guangyao’s knees and his cock shiny with both oil and precome where it’s poised a mere hairsbreadth away from where they both want it.

“Mingjue?”

“There’s no way this is fitting.”

“Ah??”

Jin Guangyao props himself up on his elbows to look down between them and Nie Mingjue attempts to ignore the way his own dick twitches when Jin Guangyao drops his head back with an exasperated groan, the entire (very biteable) expanse of his throat on display.

“Well it’s not-” Nie Mingjue huffs, his cheeks reddening.

“It absolutely will, you’ve already used your mouth and fingered me within an inch of my life, it had better fit after all this teasing-”

“I don’t think it technically counts as teasing if you already had an orgasm.”

“Do not-”

“Alright, fine! But I still say it won’t fit.”

Jin Guangyao bites his lip and squeezes his eyes shut, clearly trying to maintain some semblance of the control that Nie Mingjue has very deliberately been trying to rob him of since he started fucking him.

“It will fit,” Jin Guangyao grits out, his eyes still squeezed shut, “and I deserve it after all of this, do I not? Go slowly if you must but go-”

“Mark your words and remember that you demanded it,” Nie Mingjue mutters — and twitches his hips forward to bully his way into Jin Guangyao’s ass. Jin Guangyao yelps, a startled little thing that makes him blush even as he collapses back down onto his back with a soft fwump against the embroidered silk coverlet to blink up at the ceiling.

“Oh. Fuck.”

“Yeah,” Nie Mingjue says, “Yeah-” (and he tells himself he doesn’t sound at all strained or breathless about it, that’s just a trick of his thundering pulse messing with his hearing). It is, somehow, just as much of a revelation as Lan Xichen’s mouth had been that night they’d finally figured out how all three of them could come together properly. Despite being intimately (intimately) aware of how it feels to be in Jin Guangyao’s current position, he’s discovering very quickly that his assumption that a body couldn’t be that different from a mouth was, in fact, very very wrong.

He finds himself much more sympathetic to Lan Xichen’s incident the first time they’d tried this together, what feels like a small eternity ago now. He’s only gone far enough to make sure he didn’t stop with the widest part of the head stretching Jin Guangyao’s already-abused rim and yet he still feels like he’s absolutely not going to be able to go any further without coming immediately.

“Mingjue,” Jin Guangyao gasps, whines, whimpers — it hardly matters what shape his need takes, Nie Mingjue just knows that he hates that he can’t give him what he’s asking for yet.

“I’m close-” he grits through his teeth. Jin Guangyao tears his gaze from the ceiling to blink at him, still clearly dazed, and Nie Mingjue doesn’t miss the way he immediately zeroes in on where he’s bared his teeth in an unconscious grimace as he tries to get ahold of himself.

“Just use your qi!”

“What, to hold it off?”

“No,” Jin Guangyao huffs, arching his back and curling his arms enough to clench his fingers in the covers. “To recover immediately, like er-ge does.”

Nie Mingjue’s grimace turns into a snarl and before he can think better of it he ducks down to bite too hard at Jin Guangyao’s shoulder, forgetting in his irritation that he shouldn’t. Fair’s fair, of course, and so he doesn’t complain when Jin Guangyao smacks him hard enough on the back of the head for it to actually smart, but he also doesn’t apologize.

“Stop talking about Xichen,” he growls instead and doesn’t think too closely about the hypocrisy of the irritation; it’s pointless to pretend like he isn’t jealous, he’s already admitted to it. Eventually he knows he’ll have to quit letting it dictate his actions even if it doesn’t actually go away, but for now Jin Guangyao is whimpering in his ear yet somehow simultaneously demanding, “Make me,” as he does.

Nie Mingjue doesn’t need to be told twice.

As much as he’s irritated by the comparison to Lan Xichen, Jin Guangyao’s suggestion is actually decent so Nie Mingjue does his best to accomplish it while in the middle of an orgasm, which is easier said than done. Still, in the interest of knocking all thoughts of anything that isn’t this — that isn’t them — out of Jin Guangyao’s head, he somehow manages to make it work, and then all bets are off.

Everything becomes something of a blur, little more than desperate need spurred on by the intensity of their arguments as much as by the way he feels like he’ll fall to pieces if he can’t feel Jin Guangyao pressed against every possible inch of him and constantly trying to get closer.

He manages to use his qi to continue past the point of two orgasms (the second hitting him well after the first) before Jin Guangyao — who he hasn’t allowed to come at all yet — is sobbing his name and clawing furrows into his shoulders and begging for release, more candid and uninhibited than Nie Mingjue has ever seen him.

He only allows it when he feels reasonably sure that Jin Guangyao has forgotten everything and everyone who isn’t Nie Mingjue (and when he’s reasonably sure that he can’t actually go another round himself, even with the qi circulation trick).

On a final whim, Nie Mingjue attempts to push Jin Guangyao over the edge he’s been keeping him on since his own second orgasm with a nudge of his qi. He isn’t necessarily expecting dual cultivation, not when he’s worked so hard to tear down Jin Guangyao’s capacity for all coherent thought, but of course Jin Guangyao is nothing but an overachiever, even like this.

Rather than using the thread of qi he can focus on to keep himself hard, Nie Mingjue nudges at Jin Guangyao’s core until he feels the energy flood through his partner’s meridians, and after a small delay Jin Guangyao returns it to him, running pure and clean and leaving him feeling as euphoric as ever.

He comes to eventually, exhausted and so deeply satisfied that if it weren’t for Jin Guangyao’s hands stroking clumsily through his hair he’s fairly sure he’d just slip straight off to sleep as he usually does after sex. He wakes himself up with a combination of a line of slow, careful kisses along Jin Guangyao’s jaw and a supreme force of will.

Even as he does it, though, Nie Mingjue knows he should probably give Jin Guangyao some space as soon as he can manage it. It’s been a night of confessions both ugly and wonderful, of strong emotions, only some of them positive — it would be perfectly understandable if Jin Guangyao wanted him to clean up and get lost for the rest of the night so he could process his thoughts, lick his wounds both emotional and physical in private.

He blankets Jin Guangyao with his tired, sweat-sticky weight instead and kisses him with the sort of simmering fervor that usually hides itself so easily as just another facet of his anger. Jin Guangyao meets him with only the slightest delay, not so much of one to make him worry that it’s hesitation, and Nie Mingjue happily loses his sense of time to the heady give-and-take of kissing Jin Guangyao like it can somehow make up for all the time they’ve wasted being angry with each other.

He’s only slightly chagrined to find that he still doesn’t know how to navigate that. He doesn’t feel like he was in the wrong, but he knows now that he wasn’t always right either, and his anger was justified but ultimately useless. Jin Guangyao is as unrepentant as ever; Nie Mingjue knows he can’t stand to keep him at arm’s length and that to try to do so was a doomed endeavor from the very start. He’s not used to having anger that can’t do anything. He wants to ask where this leaves them, but to ask would be to open up their raw wounds all over again for the third time tonight.

He can’t do that, not when Jin Guangyao is holding his face so carefully between both hands to hold him still so he can bruise his mouth with bites hard enough to sting even after a pass or two of the soft, soothing heat of his tongue in something as close to a genuine apology as Nie Mingjue is likely to get.

(He’ll take it without complaint.)

He isn’t surprised when Jin Guangyao eventually grows tired of being crushed underneath him and nudges him with hands and knees both to coax him into rolling over onto his back; what surprises him is that Jin Guangyao comes with him, allowing no space at all between them and hiding a little whimper in Nie Mingjue’s mouth when the jostling is still enough to make his softened cock slip out of his body.

Eventually he sighs and turns his head enough that Jin Guangyao kisses his way lightly down to his neck instead, the sweat collected in the curve of it already dried and cool under the heated press of his mouth.

“What do we do about all of this?” he finally asks the gilded ceiling without much hope for an answer. “Do we just continue like this, pretending like everything’s fine until we wind up here all over again?”

As expected, Jin Guangyao doesn’t answer him right away. He finishes the series of kisses he’s peppering across his collarbones and down the valley of his sternum, only propping himself up enough to meet his eyes, his hands splayed on Nie Mingue’s chest, when he’s pressed a few tender, unintelligible words into the soft vulnerability below his ribcage.

“What else do we do?” he asks, head tilted slightly to the side and his lips bitten red and swollen. Other bruises are already darkening on his hips, his throat — fingertips and teeth and Nie Mingjue’s greed plain to see on his body. “Er-ge will be upset if we don’t.”

Nie Mingjue tamps down the little flash of jealousy with an effort in favor of worrying about more important things.

“I don’t want to keep fighting with you over the same shit. I’m not going to change-”

“Neither am I.”

“Then your precious compromise is useless,” Nie Mingjue can’t help but snap, his lip curling. Lan Xichen is incredible at compromise, both in his own life and in helping others see its benefits. He can turn entire rooms full of posturing, egotistical sect leaders in whatever direction he wants, he can make clans with sworn feuds set aside their anger at each other in service of a goal they unexpectedly share (even if they’d never shared it before Lan Xichen’s intervention), and he can do it without raising any alarm whatsoever. He’s the definition of a gentle touch, a refined gentleman, a scholar who sees the path through any trouble laid at his feet — and he can do nothing for them that lasts, no matter how hard he’s tried.

And he’s tried, Nie Mingjue has watched him try like his entire life depends on their reconciliation.

“Poor Xichen,” he mumbles; he’s looking past Jin Guangyao to the ceiling again, but he still sees it in his peripheral vision when Jin Guangyao starts ever so slightly, a little hitch in his shoulders, an almost-shake of his head like there’s a fly buzzing by his ear.

“Poor Xichen?” he repeats, cautious. “Why poor er-ge? Don’t tell me you feel remorse for him but not for me-”

“Don’t you?” Nie Mingjue shoots back, pairing it with a glare for good measure. “Don’t try to lie to me, you feel guilty that we upset him but you don’t feel the same for me, you’ve just said it! Xichen will be ‘upset’ if we can’t figure out how to be happy together, but what of me? What of you? If we can agree on only one thing in the world, apparently it’s that we hate to see what we do to him.”

Jin Guangyao has no argument for that, of course, but it puts a sour little pout on his mouth that Nie Mingjue digs his thumb into the corner of, just to see him jerk away from the rough touch and scowl down at him. The scowl fades quickly back into contemplation, and Nie Mingjue drags his hand down to cup against the side of Jin Guangyao’s neck, pressing the pad of his thumb under the hinge of his jaw with a hint of curiosity that’s rewarded immediately when Jin Guangyao bares his throat without seeming to think about it.

He’s visibly unhappy when he sighs and concedes, “You’re right,” his hands flexing momentarily into claws on Nie Mingjue’s chest and then smoothing out flat again. “Poor er-ge. He’s bent over backwards just to get us this far, and it can’t possibly be where he’d hoped we would be.”

“Do you think he can do that?” Nie Mingjue asks, his mind starting to drift further and further towards Lan Xichen, despite hating it when Jin Guangyao does the same thing to him. “Bend backwards, I mean.”

Jin Guangyao snorts and finally jerks his chin away from Nie Mingjue’s pressing thumb to fix him with the full force of his skeptical amusement. “Mingjue. Of course he can, the Lan are only rigid in their rules.”

Nie Mingjue can’t help but snicker and then, taking the low-hanging fruit so generously offered to him, says, “Well not only in their rules, as we’ve discovered.” 

Jin Guangyao digs his nails into his chest again and Nie Mingjue does him the courtesy of wincing this time, though considering Jin Guangyao lightens up immediately and lays back down on him with some grumbling under his breath, he must not have been very convincing.

This is better, though, he thinks. All things considered, Lan Xichen is still a relatively safe topic for them to talk about together — almost certainly guaranteed to lead to fewer emotionally fraught arguments about their past hurts, at least.

“We should do something for him. He deserves something nice,” Jin Guangyao eventually murmurs when his irritated muttering has subsided.

“Agreed. Like what?”

Jin Guangyao is quiet for a long time, fingertips tracing idle ovals around the ball of Nie Mingjue’s shoulder. He tucks his arms more firmly around Jin Guangyao’s waist and settles in to wait, at least somewhat more willing to be patient now that he’s worn himself out.

When Jin Guangyao finally answers, Nie Mingjue can’t honestly say it’s anything he would’ve expected.

“He seems to enjoy watching us together, and I think he might like it when one of us bosses him around.”

“No, he likes it when you boss him around,” Nie Mingjue snorts despite the heat in his cheeks to be discussing this so casually without Lan Xichen here to speak for himself. “He wants to bully me but he wants to be bullied by you.”

Jin Guangyao taps the tip of his forefinger against the peak of Nie Mingjue’s shoulder. “Hmm… you make a good point. He hasn’t tried taking either of us, but I think he’d enjoy it. He would be so easy to overwhelm like that, don’t you think?”

Nie Mingjue pushes through his vague, formless embarrassment to think about it in the sort of detail Jin Guangyao is inviting him to. He thinks of Lan Xichen’s eagerness to please, and the glassy look in his eyes when he knows he’s done well and he can finally relax. He thinks about the way he gravitates towards any soft touch, leaning with his whole body into a hand on his cheek, or in his hair. He thinks about how warm and pliant he’d been that day they’d shared a bath, and how he’d apparently been so needy afterwards despite having a good orgasm that he’d slipped into Jin Guangyao’s bed with a handful of flimsy excuses to give them both enough plausible deniability to feel like they could be allowed to give into their desire for each other.

“He would be,” he finally says, his voice a little rougher than it should be considering he’s lounged around more than long enough to get his breath back. “He’d feel so good he wouldn’t know what to do; the Lan precepts can only take him so far, eventually he’ll run out of scripts to follow.”

“Mmm I wonder what’s actually under all those rules? They barely keep him in check as it is, he must be incredible when he doesn’t feel the need to let them limit him.”

“Is it even possible to push him to that point?” Nie Mingjue muses, drawing mirroring circles on the small of Jin Guangyao’s back in the same rhythm his partner is still stroking his shoulder. “In all the years I’ve known him I’ve never seen him forget the rules entirely, not even in the heat of battle — not even drunk, which for him is worse in many ways.”

“There’s only one way to find out,” Jin Guangyao chuckles, quietly confident in that way he has that drives Nie Mingjue a little wild. “Actually there are many ways, but they’re all sexual so I’m counting them as one.”

“What ways?” he asks, and yeah his voice is definitely rasping now, and between that and the fact that Jin Guangyao is laying right on top of him, he has no defense for himself when Jin Guangyao slowly props himself up on one forearm across his chest to look down at him with a raised brow.

“Mingjue,” he chides in a voice that promises trouble, “are you getting hard again talking about er-ge?” The ‘you hypocrite’ is mercifully only implied, which means he can pretend he doesn’t know exactly what Jin Guangyao is staring down at him like that for.

Nie Mingjue jerks his chin and glances down between them, though of course he can’t see what he can feel. “Are you going to lie to me and act like you’re not?”

Jin Guangyao hums in the back of his throat and keeps his eyes locked on Nie Mingjue’s as he leans down again to press a slow kiss to the tip of his chin. “I suppose I shouldn’t.”

“No,” Nie Mingjue agrees. He presses his palm to the curve of Jin Guangyao’s ass firmly enough to coax him into grinding against him and there’s definitely no denying that they’re both hard again.

“We should put him between us,” Jin Guangyao murmurs between soft kisses along his jaw. “Pin him until he can’t move unless we let him, make it so he feels nothing that isn’t us. No silk covers, not the bed, nothing but you and me.”

Nie Mingjue stares up at the ceiling and tries to decide if it’s better to imagine it or not. Because he can see it so clearly, Lan Xichen caught off guard by their combined attacks on his defenses, already so weak to them, and unable to resist falling into them and going wherever they decide he should.

“He’d give in easily,” he says to Jin Guangyao still kissing along the curve of his neck. “I could lay underneath him, hold his hands and use my legs to keep his spread for you.”

Jin Guangyao rewards him with a sharp bite at the corner of his jaw that makes his heart thud in his chest and his eyelashes flutter, the ceiling momentarily disappearing before he manages to open his eyes again.

“Good,” Jin Guangyao purrs. “What else?”

Nie Mingjue’s thoughts are quickly slipping along the edges of fantasies of so much skin against his and Lan Xichen’s overwhelmed crying as Jin Guangyao takes him apart at the seams, ruthless precision turned to the most worthy purpose he can imagine. He’s thinking too quickly to share any of it aloud, and how’s he meant to talk about the imagined gasps and moans and desperate calls for his name anyway? Jin Guangyao’s imagination is better than his, surely he’s thinking along the same lines.

Jin Guangyao bites him again, less pleasantly and clearly impatient for him to answer, and Nie Mingjue hisses for the sharp sting of it but doesn’t retaliate. “What else, ge?”

“He’ll cry,” Nie Mingjue mumbles, the first thing that comes to mind but it’s no less true for that. He knows Lan Xichen, knows how difficult it is to push him far enough to get at his real emotions, the ugly ones he doesn’t want to let others see, but he also knows that if anyone can get him there it’s going to be Jin Guangyao.

“Oh?”

“We’ll push him as far as his cultivation will allow, as long as it takes.” He can see it so clearly, Lan Xichen finally sated and sweaty and completely wrung out between their combined efforts, grinning sleepily and overwhelmed in the best way as he lounges on Nie Mingjue’s chest. “We wait until he’s almost completely gone and then we’ll tell him we love him, and that’ll be what does it.”

“Poor er-ge,” Jin Guangyao finally returns to his mouth to pout against it, soft and warm, “he’s such a romantic, he won’t be able to stop himself.”

Nie Mingjue drags a hand up from Jin Guangyao’s back, rough and grasping at bare skin, until he can bury it in his hair and crush their mouths together for a proper, bruising kiss.

Jin Guangyao, intelligent as he is, doesn’t try to pull away, but he doesn’t exactly give Nie Mingjue the upper hand either. He grinds down against him and digs his nails into Nie Mingjue’s chest and shoulder with tight pinches that may or may not draw a bit of blood and Nie Mingjue is a big enough man to admit that it’s not only Lan Xichen who wants to be bullied and pushed around by their partner.

He goes with just enough fight to make it clear he’s (enthusiastically) letting Jin Guangyao win, and the almost-painful orgasm Jin Guangyao manages to wring out of him with some particularly deft rolls of his hips is more than worth the ‘loss’. He returns the favor in every way Jin Guangyao demands of him, and this time when they’re both finished there’s no hope at all of coherent conversation, let alone a restart of their argument.

They fall asleep tangled up together, and when they wake the next morning Nie Mingjue bears Jin Guangyao’s irritation at the mess with smirks and a few extra mollifying kisses as they help each other bathe and arrange their robes and hair to at least try to look presentable.

Nie Mingjue is fairly sure they’ve fooled most people if only because no one in Lanling would know to look for the signs, but there’s no avoiding Lan Xichen’s shocked and mildly reproving stare when he arrives just in time for dinner the next evening, here for just a quick morning meeting tomorrow and to then accompany Nie Mingjue back to Qinghe. He at least seems to have no trouble noticing that they’ve both clearly been (lovingly) mauled within the past 24 hours, and abruptly there’s no room at all for Nie Mingjue’s jealousy around the smug pride he can’t quite hide when Lan Xichen makes it clear he’s noticed Jin Guangyao’s thoroughly well-fucked attitude. He watches Lan Xichen give Jin Guangyao several thorough full-body looks over dinner, he watches Jin Guangyao preen under the attention and shoot Nie Mingjue sly, flirtatious glances in between to give credit where it’s due, and the jealous thing in his chest curls up in a warm little ball and practically starts purring.

He did that. Jin Guangyao clearly feels just as smug as he had after his night alone with Lan Xichen, and Nie Mingjue knows it’s stupid and ridiculous but he can’t shake the feeling that he’s won some sort of…competition. Lan Xichen stares at him too, of course, and Nie Mingjue can appreciate the hunger in his eyes and the knowledge that he doesn’t actually want to keep Jin Guangyao exclusively for himself – he can’t stand the thought of either of them truly losing Lan Xichen’s love and companionship – but it isn’t as if his temper is logical.

They didn’t really resolve things between themselves (certainly not in the way he knows Lan Xichen was hoping they would), but for now that’s alright. He knows he’s not going anywhere and now Jin Guangyao does, too; Lan Xichen just has to wait for them long enough for that to become enough.

(They’re fully prepared to make it worth his while.)

[web-novel-polls]

Priest (Author) Character Lower Bracket

[“Anti-propaganda” is not allowed. Please only give reasons to vote FOR a character, and please be courteous in the notes.]

Chu Huan from Of Mountains and Rivers / Shan He Biao Li 

Submission: 

His vibes are insane. A character pipi made by putting Wen Kexing and Zhou Zishu in a jar and shaking, and then wrapping the result in the most unassuming shell possible. That one post that went like "perfectly normal man that has something seriously wrong with him" might as well have been made about him. Kills like 20 ppl in his introduction scene, falls off a cliff, gets on a bus, and agrees to become a teacher for those random guys he met because one of them is hot. Speaking of, his bi awakening and accepting it happens in a span of like, one second. *Sees a hot guy* welp, homosexual attraction is not a sin! Also, somehow has perfect tumblr shitposter vibes. Was asked what's a word for "good brother" in his language and after careful consideration said "bitch". Did I mention he's insane? "Play me a tune, and I'll go along with your BDSM play." Or that time he woke up after being clinically dead for a bit (saw his deceased loved ones asking him to go into the light and all) and to his bf's frantic questioning of "Does it hurt?" immediately went "Yes. It hurts a lot. You have to kiss it better." like bestie your priorities.... Anyway yeah what a guy.

Tong Ru / Lord Beiming from Liu Yao: The Revitalization of Fuyao Sect 

“Beiming? Who deserves the title of Beiming? That’s merely an arrogant title given by some short-sighted people.” - Lord Beiming, Liu Yao: The Revitalization of Fuyao Sect, Chapter 16

[No propaganda submitted]

“It’s just death, nothing serious.” - Lord Beiming, ch.30 

***I, the poll runner, have not gotten to the Lord Beiming reveal, so I’m not 100% sure the quotes from where I’m at are correct/for the same person (since there’s another person trying to claim the title of Lord Beiming)

(Also, Tong Ru and Han Muchun are sharing a picture because it’s way too blurry with just one lol)

Mu Xiaoqiao from Bandits / You Fei / Legend of Fei

Submission: 

"People tended to apply the highest of standards when judging the behavior of revered saints like the Sword of Mountains and Rivers: if they made even the smallest of missteps, they would be deemed unworthy of their sterling reputations, and be lambasted for hypocrisy. But people were much more magnanimous towards Mu Xiaoqiao and those of his vile ilk, for as long as these fiends didn’t go around killing everyone in sight…or as long as this violence was directed at others instead, they could sometimes even find something perversely charming about these villains." (Bandits, book 3, chapter 13)  Callout for who? Callout for me. Pipi is very right about this but also she is the one writing her murderous gays so epic and sexy and fascinating and irresistible and…

[leatherbookmark]

ALSO a bit on that topic and partially inspired by lise’s essay from yesterday -- jl.

the quote:

The smile had been so kind, so genuine that Jin Ling couldn’t believe Jin Guangyao had faked it. All of a sudden, fresh tears fell from his eyes.

Jin Ling had always thought that crying was a sign of weakness, and had treated it with contempt. Yet, other than this flood of tears, there was no way to release all the pain and anger in his heart.

He didn’t know why, but he felt like he couldn’t hate or blame anyone. Wei Wuxian, Jin Guangyao, Wen Ning — Each of them was responsible in some way for the deaths of his parents, and each of them had given him a reason to loathe them. But it also seemed like each of them had left him unable to do so. But if he didn’t hate them, who could he hate? Had he deserved to lose his parents? Was he not only unable to seek revenge, but also unable to simply hate anyone?

He somehow didn’t want to let go. He felt wronged. He felt like he’d rather die together with them and end everything.

Watching him cry soundlessly as he stared at the coffin, Sect Leader Yao asked,

“Jin-gongzi, why are you crying? For Jin Guangyao?”

When Jin Ling said nothing, Sect Leader Yao spoke as a senior scolding a junior.

“What are you crying for? Hold back your tears. Someone like your uncle doesn’t deserve anyone’s tears. Jin-gongzi, I mean no offense, but you can’t be so weak! This sentimentality is more suitable to the fairer sex. You should know what’s right and what’s wrong, and straighten up your…”

(...)

Jin Ling had thousands of thoughts and feelings whirling inside him already. Hearing Sect Leader Yao’s remarks, a fire surged in his heart.

He shouted, “So what if I want to cry?! Who are you? What are you? You won’t leave me alone even when I’m crying?!”

(chapter 110, EXR)

what does this scene mean, and why is it here?

i, personally, love it. jl says (well, thinks) it himself -- he has all the reasons to hate wwx, wn and jgy and blame them for the deaths of his parents. note that this is after he finds out about jgy’s involvement! he could easily go “i used to hate wn and wwx as the villains who killed my parents and love jgy as the uncle who gave me fairy, but now i see i had it all wrong and i should love them and hate him instead”. he doesn’t do that though. he still groups them all together, still grapples with anger, pain and hatred, and still finds that he can’t hate any of them.

and he struggles with it! he really does, to the point of bursting into tears. this is not just jc’s fault, before anyone tries anything -- the entire world jianghu seems to be into the idea that every bad thing that happens has a Bad Person who caused it and needs to be punished and reviled. first it was wrh, then wwx, now jgy. and later probably someone else. but here, jl learns a (very painful) lesson -- sometimes things aren’t so easy as “X is 100% bad”, or even “X is 75% bad, but even that is enough to condemn them”, OR even “X is 67% bad, but being 1/3rd Good they should have known better and GROW BETTER”.

sometimes people are people.

so what does this scene tell us about jgy? well, sect leader yao hurries with an explanation: jl shouldn’t cry, jgy isn’t worth it, and in fact, crying is for pussies; real men know what’s right and what’s wrong, and-- wait, no? is that not what we’re supposed to think? why is jin ling shouting at this kind senior who kindly offers advice?

well, perhaps because sect leader yao isn’t the best source there is.

but really -- that’s the question: is jl wrong, and sly right? is jl wrong to see Nuance in people, to realize that life is not as easy as finding a villain to blame, avenging your family and basking in the glow of satisfaction? or is he a manipulated victim who can’t see how horrible their abuser was, even when faced with proof of it all?

this is perhaps the last scene “featuring” jgy, not counting the one with people talking in the inn in the last chapter. in the previous chapter, wwx lays it all out in front of lwj, lxc and nhs: the explanation of what jgy wanted to do in the temple, the possible reason why he organized the burial mounds party. that’s it, that’s the end, we don’t really need anything more. if anything, it could be jc to lead the narration pov, looking at jl with fairy and thinking about this man who gave his nephew a puppy and turned out to have been a monster all this time. this, again, doesn’t happen.

[songofclarity]

In which Nie Mingjue discovers that Wen Ruohan isn't bad, he's just been living on a different planet

(For reference: five coins could buy a beautifully horrific portrait of the Yiling Patriarch)

Wen Chao was the one who told Wen Ruohan it was 100 coins in the first place so he could spend the change on his girlfriend

Wen Xu thinks Wen Ruohan is wrong about a 100-coins banana, but he never looks at prices when shopping and always tells the seller to keep the receipt, so he doesn't know enough about market prices to dispute it

Meng Yao is like, "...Yes, it's 100 coins," and then adds the excess amount into his 5 Year Plan™ piggy bank

Jin Guangshan is also like, "...Yes, it's 100 coins," and outwardly pretends like he doesn't know any better when he really, really does and has to discreetly drink the vinegar

Jiang Fengmian just kind of shrugs his shoulders, "Sure."

Madam Jin and Madam Yu are hanging out just like 😑🍷🍷😑 and thinking maybe money can buy happiness if Wen Ruohan can be that oblivious and maybe they should have set their sights on becoming Madam Wen instead

Lan Xichen nods along in agreement because he is another person who has never set foot in a market (Meng Yao's 5 Year Plan™ is starting off great)

Nie Huaisang has no idea because he only eats fruits and vegetables when someone else puts them on the table

Lazy edit bonus because Wen Ruohan deserves a cupcake:

[ionshi-teiru]

sunkissed (cw: blood and scarring)

[aitchnkay]

Jiang Gunian Made A Change Part 29

Wen Xu was a much better commander than his younger brother had been. The Nie and Lan forces were hard pressed to hold the Unclean Realm. Jiang YanLi's strike teams nipped at Wen Xu's flanks, but were unable to achieve anything significant.

She looked at their map, struggling to put the strategies she'd learned over the last few months into practice. No matter how she ordered her teams, she couldn't see any way to break the siege or give a moralizing victory to her troops or allies.

Wei WuXian and Lan WangJi stepped into the tent. "We've been skulking," her brother smiled. "Wen Xu is here," he moved a token to another spot on the map. "Along with about fifty men. It's a decent sized hill, and the base is surrounded with those fierce corpses he's brought. Perhaps two hundred." Next to her, Meng Yao smiled his happy evil smile. "Exactly," Wei WuXian's grin echoed the strategic advisor. "We've got him."

"I don't understand," Jiang YanLi moved around the table, hoping to see what was causing the others to be so happy.

Meng Yao moved a few tokens to the same spot as Wen Xu's. "Fifty defenders against our best strike teams. We hide behind the talismans; the corpses won't notice us. We take out the living soldiers, and then Wen Xu."

"Ah." It was so easy to picture the battle, now that he'd explained it. "Strike now? Or wait till early morning?"

"It would be easier to get him in the early dawn," Meng Yao mused. "Not as effective, morale-wise. There's plenty of time today for us to get in place."

"Today then," she agreed. "Make it happen." The men bowed and prepared to leave. "Wei WuXian, please stay back." Her brother gave her a look, but did as she asked. Once they were alone in the tent, she arranged her thoughts. "Meng Yao needs to be the one who kills Wen Xu."

Wei WuXian cocked his head. "Why?"

"Just like you knew A'Cheng had to be the one who killed Wen Chao. I know Meng Yao needs to be the one to kill Wen Xu."

"I gave Wen Chao to ChengCheng because he could use the clout more than I will. Are you sure Meng Yao deserves this honor?"

"Do you know what he's capable of?" Her younger brother nodded. "I will give anything to keep you safe, A'Xian." She pointed to Crescent Island. "This will be where he starts his Clan. A clan leader who is a hero of the Sunshot Campaign will be treated with far more respect than the son of a prostitute who tries to set himself up as a clan leader."

"Is respect enough to keep me alive? To keep you alive?"

"The lack of respect was enough to kill you," she reminded her brother. "Besides, I have a much better target for you."

"Oh?"

"You will be the one to kill Wen RuoHan."

[evilhasnever]

what do you think time traveler wen zhuliu would do?

Mmmh I’ll admit, WZL is one of those characters I think have great potential but I haven’t really given him any thought… (except for ways Meng Yao could steal his powers!)

He’s definitely a cool and interesting dude who deserved a better job than babysitting Wen Chao, but whatever he’d do with a second chance is totally up for debate. I’m opening the floor to WZL enthusiasts everywhere!

[ao3feed-xicheng]

untitled 0584793

by Maxciel_99 alternately, the transmigration of one angry Jiang Cheng into an unnecessary fusion of two AUs. Jiang Cheng is an enthusiastic translator for writer Nie Huaisang's book. Not for the book, per se, but more so for the pay. He's supposed to earn as much to help out at home and go to college. And then he slips on ice, dies, and gets transmigrated into the very book he both likes and dislikes as the most loathed secondary villain--more loathed than the main villains--omega, Jiang Wanyin, whose future he's not sure of but knows is looking bleak. He's not sure if the changes in everyone's attitude is for good or for worse, though. Words: 6119, Chapters: 3/?, Language: English Fandoms: 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 魔道祖师 | Módào Zǔshī (Webcomic), 魔道祖师 | Módào Zǔshī (Cartoon), 魔道祖师Q | Módào Zǔshī Q (Cartoon), 魔道祖师 | Módào Zǔshī (Audio Drama), 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Categories: F/M, Gen, M/M, Other Characters: Wen Sect Characters, Cang Qiong Mountain Sect, Original Characters, Nie Huaisang, Nie Mingjue, Lan Qiren Relationships: Jiang Cheng | Jiang Wanyin/Lan Huan | Lan Xichen, Jiang Cheng | Jiang Wanyin & Everyone, Lan Zhan | Lan Wangji/Wei Ying | Wei Wuxian, Jiang Cheng | Jiang Wanyin & Jiang Fengmian & Jiang Yanli & Wei Ying | Wei Wuxian & Yu Ziyuan, Jiang Cheng | Jiang Wanyin & Original Character(s), Wen Ruohan & Yu Ziyuan, Jiang Yanli/Jin Zixuan Additional Tags: Everyone Loves Jiang Cheng | Jiang Wanyin, Everyone Wants Jiang Cheng | Jiang Wanyin, Jiāng Chéng | Jiāng Wǎnyín-centric, Soft Jiāng Chéng | Jiāng Wǎnyín, Omega Jiāng Chéng | Jiāng Wǎnyín, Cute Jiang Cheng | Jiang Wanyin, Everything's fluffy and lighthearted, and absolutely brain-rotting, and then we get hurt, Isekai and Transmigration, Alternate Universe - Old Western, Alternate Universe - ABO, Sects into Dukedoms, Wen Sect as the Royals, my compensation defense mechanism for not updating hwdii, i forgot to make Meng Yao good, Wei Ying is badass and best and worst gege, Jin Zixuan has a personality, Jiang siblings deserve better parents, Jiang Cheng is mighty oblivious, Alpha/Beta/Omega stereotypes, that JC tries to diverge from for the sake of his manly pride, he fails via https://ift.tt/xamQwih

[mdzs-owns-my-ass-i-guess]

Women's business

Happy Lesbian Visibility Week to all those who celebrate and identify as such!

I don't think I've ever written anything Sapphic before, so I hope this is enjoyable nonetheless!

There are some implied suggestive themes here but it's nothing outright explicit. This AU makes no sense canonically, but I love powerful women who deserved better, so that's why I came up with this!

Special thanks to @apho-sappho for enabling me to write this.

Enjoy!

"Sect leader Wen." The servant calls out, "Sect leader Jin wishes to see you."

A nod is all the confirmation it takes, and the servant disappears behind the ornate doors, returning seconds later with the guest in tow. A respectful bow later, the two are left alone in the silence of the late evening.

"I did not think you would be visiting me anymore tonight." Sect leader Wen says, smiling warmly from her seat at the large, mahogany table in the center of her room. She seems to have been reading some paperwork, annotating it with the brush resting between her middle and index finger, rings and bracelets glimmering in the candlelight. She has discarded her outer robe, heavy with jewels and golden thread woven through expensive silk, in favor of a light, nearly see-through cream-colored dress.

Her hair flows down her back and shoulders in long, shining strands, and Sect Leader Jin cannot help admiring her. Delicate, red powders enhance the beauty of her eyes, and her lips still shine with remnants of lip stain, her youthful face showing no signs of aging.

She has worn a beautiful pair of ruby earrings that day during the discussion conference proceedings, but she seems to have abandoned them in favor of a pair of simple, golden studs. There is a matching, thin necklace resting atop Sect Leader Wen's chest, a single, round pendant decorating it. Sect Leader Jin knows the symbol of Sparks Amidst Snow has been etched into it, delicately enough for it to only be visible up close.

"A-Su," Wen Qing begins, a playful smile on her lips. "It is quite rude to request an audience this late at night and only spend it staring at me."

Qin Su blinks twice, shaken out of her stupor. She has almost forgotten that is her name, so used to being called "sect leader Jin" all the time, and her cheeks dust pink.

"Can you blame me?" She replies, and sheds her own sect leader's robe, "Any seeing person would be enraptured with the sight of you."

Wen Qing laughs. "Flatterer. If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're trying to earn my favor for tomorrow's proceedings."

Qin Su makes a displeased face and helps herself to the bottle of wine on Wen Qing's table. "I'd rather not think about that. I've had enough of arguing with entitled men for one day."

Wen Qing lets her pour a cup of wine before taking the bottle for herself. "At least you're not the Chief Cultivator."

Qin Su lays down on Wen Qing's bed, and gingerly sips at her cup. "How long do I have to wait until you join me here?"

Wen Qing's eyes flick towards her, and she just so happens to have been loosening the sash of her robes. "Be patient."

Qin Su rolls her eyes as she finishes her wine and reaches to free her hair from its imposing ornamentation. She lifts an amused eyebrow when she notices Wen Qing watching her, ink dripping from the tip of her brush onto the documents.

"You're making a mess of those." She laughs. "Maybe you should be making a mess of me instead~"

But Wen Qing has played this game before and she has never once lost it. She returns to her paperwork, and hides a smirk as she notices Qin Su frowning at the obvious challenge. "Sect Leader Jin, you would need to prove yourself more interesting than these records from our very controversial Yao sect for me to abandon them."

But Qin Su's interest is piqued. "What records?"

"Well, let's just say I received an anonymous suggestion from an anonymous source-"

"Nie Huaisang?"

Wen Qing smiles, fox-like, and Qin Su feels herself flutter everywhere at the sight. "Precisely. It seems like the Yao sect has been duplicitous using the funds we have given them to extend their cultivation schools, so I got a hold of some records-"

"Wei Wuxian?"

"Who else? That sneaky paperman spell of his always comes in handy." She drinks some more of the wine and does not pretend like she didn't purposefully leave a few drops to slide down her chin into her cleavage. "So now I am comparing what I've been told with what appears to be the actual list of expenditures."

Qin Su stretches on the bed like a cat, and cannot hide a hint of devilish satisfaction. "I fear I may not be able to make myself more interesting than those. Can you imagine the scandal if word got out of this right as we're about to decide on the budget?"

Wen Qing smiles, one of her knowing, vengeful, dominant smiles, "It would be truly unfortunate, wouldn't it? I fear the Yao sect might become politically isolated... Even from its close friend, the Jin sect."

Qin Su laughs, heartily. "How I'd love to get rid of that parasite! I don't know why my... predecessor" she spits the word like it's an insult, "has insisted to ally with them. But anyway, I wouldn't cry about losing them, just so you know."

Wen Qing places her brush in its holder and finally stands up from her table. "That's wonderful, I'd hate to see you cry."

Qin Su can't help a wolfish grin. "I thought you said I'm pretty when I cry."

"Only when you cry for me."