#to my autistic followers: Its so important to get to know why you think and this things believe me Its worth going to the therapist

[trafficpan-ic]

You all better care about your mental health 🔫 🔫🔫

Anyway my therapist resceduled our appointment, is this what you get if you listen to your mind?

[libraford]

msbriket You know how they say us autistics see every detail? I just think a lot of people forget what's not important to them personally. What she's really saying is: why won't you let me ignore your wishes like last time so I can forget about them again?

You know, even before I started seeing autistic traits in myself I was confused why autism had such a negative association to it because like:

"takes things literally" is more like... trusting people at their word. Trying to follow instructions accurately. Remembers promises made.

"lacking in certain social tacts" - does their best to speak clearly and concisely. Tries to avoid being misunderstood because they would want the same for themselves.

"doesn't like breaking rules" - rules that are there for our safety are in our best interest to follow!

"has difficulty with changes in routine" - doesn't like being lied to or misguided. Would like instruction to be clear.

Which I have always perceived to be good things. "Concerned about fairness." "Strong moral compass."

Those are good things to have. In fact, you WANT a person like that in most workplaces. A person who tries to follow instructions and remembers things, who tries to speak clearly and truthfully, who understands the rules and asks for confirmations, who tries to make sure things are fair and accessible? Honestly, sounds great.

The problem is that the corporate world is all about lying and placating and bargaining and making false promises and hoping that they'll forget.

And then there's The Gender. Which is another layer of bull. Because the specialist in my field that infodumps during training and lacks tactful criticism techniques in a long unbroken tone is the best in the business, but I get lectured on my tone and body language. He's allowed to talk endlessly on the topic. I'm not allowed to ask questions or request clarification.

That, and some people only really know autism in its forms of nonverbiality, emotional disregulation, and motor control which require assistance and not like... an entire Golden Corral of traits that include those things and more.

Yadda yadda, neurotypicality is a 3 apples 5 apples situation.

[drdemonprince]

genuine question, I get why blaming people who have just caught covid for it is some fucked up victim blaming bullshit, and highly analogous to shaming ppl who've gotten an STI, but is it okay to assign blame/responsibility to people who *give* others covid? it seems to me that just like with STIs (particularly HIV and HSV bc they're not curable) its your responsibility as like, a person who has sex and isn't a total asshole, to do a reasonably good job of knowing whether you have these things, and then either give people who might catch it from you the ability to consent knowing that, or only interact with people in such a way that transmission is highly unlikely. In other words, having or getting an infection is morally neutral, but failing to break the chain of transmission isn't, especially when that failure results from complete inaction/ignoring the problem, as opposed to *attempting* to break it and failing due to factors outside your control. I've seen people saying that beleiving this is the same as slut shaming people who get STIs, and tbh that seems ridiculous to me, but what do you think? is "if you have covid and pass it on to someone, especially by going around in public without a mask, you are morally responsible for the harm the disease causes them" incorrect/going to backfire in some way I'm not seeing? I do get how the same statement about HIV is not good, but also you can't give someone HIV by eating in the same restaurant, so it seems like there are some important differences.

The passage on moralizing HIV transmission in Sarah Schulman's book Conflict is Not Abuse is a real stand-out passage in an otherwise (to me) highly underwhelming tome -- because Schulman has been involved in AIDS activism since its early days and is very conversant in the laws that have been used to incarcerate gay men and others for having the virus, and for supposedly passing it along to other people.

We can philosophize all we want about how wrong it would be for a person to knowingly go about infecting other people, but when we're actually dealing with how such matters go in the real world, it's not a useful moral or practical question. How do we know that someone knows they have the virus? Do we consider a person morally culpable if they have the sniffles but brush it off, not realizing it's something more serious? What about an Autistic person or trauma survivor with alexithymia, who is not closely attuned with their body states? If I can walk around with a bleeding gash on my leg for hours or a bloody UTI and not know it, I can have a mild cold and not know it. Am I too blame for spreading the virus then? What about someone who does know they have COVID but has no legal protections in their workplace and no financial support and determines they have no choice but to do a shift at the grocery store, because otherwise they'll be fired and at risk of homelessness?

These might sound like extreme examples, but we're talking about collectively millions of people's everyday experiences here. If a person is at fault for any disease that they spread, what then? What logically follows from that declaration? Should we make knowing transmission illegal? We've already seen in history how such a policy is used to terrorize and oppress gay men. It's an impossible thing to enforce, because someone's knowledge state is impossible to fully know or surveil, especially when we're not, you know, providing tests to anyone in any kind of systematic way, and in fact our government and most of our employers are actively discouraging us from testing or knowing too much.

Of course, I doubt that you actually want any kind of legal policy like that very much. I'm certain what you are really asking about is what responsibilities we should reasonably expect individual people to hold. And the answer is, well, look at how they are holding them now! Clearly people do not have adequate support at the moment to even be cognizant of their status. It's not a useful question. It just isn't. If we were providing free tests every day at major public access points and legally protecting people's rights to call off sick whenever they did test positive, and paying them lost wages, then we could talk about people being irresponsible and knowingly spreading a disease out of malice or laziness. but we don't have any of that, so we can't.

The solution to a population failing to take the "right" actions is always to look at the external factors that makes taking the right action hard. And right now? Being responsible surrounding covid is very, very hard. We can condemn every person who spreads COVID (or HIV) to another person morally all we like, but it's not going to save lives, and it's going to harm a lot of vulnerable people in the process, so why do it? Why not instead ask ourselves what we can do as a society to help make it easier for a person to behave in pro-social ways?

[dr-spectre]

man i saw your last two posts and i wanted to tell you, you're not cringe, and you're not unlovable

i've had like, one full conversation with you going back and forth on both shared and unshared interests and it had a profound effect on me at the time

I need to unlearn shame, i need to be more open with what i fixate on and what i'm doing (and also the realization i'm definitely on some kind of spectrum), from one chat with someone *loud and proud* like you, how fucking crazy is that?

I hardly know you personally, but it's not hard to gauge how awesome you are, in face of your perceived faults, several of which i share myself, you yap so much but you're so genuine and passionate i and pretty much everyone who sticks here loves to read it, it never gets old, it never gets annoying

you put your whole pussy into innocuous little things about the subject matter, and it's a wonderful thing

you can find friends, you can find love, and you deserve both of those things

this is a little long but it's sentiments i've had for awhile now but no good opportunity to share......

I.... I..... WHA.

WHAT DO I EVEN SAY TO THIS?!?!?! YOU CAN'T DROP THIS IN MY INBOX LIKE THAT!!!

LISTEN... ITS JUST.... I aint awesome!!! Im some 20 year old autistic dude who's too obsessed with a squid woman! How's that awesome!!?!?!? I haven't made an impact on anything... not on the community... not on inkipedia... not on anyone... I have 300 followers... that's nothing...

...or have i?!?! There's no way I could have had an impact on someone... hell even SEVERAL PEOPLE! I just overanalyse stuff that seems so cut and dry but... people are actually positive about my stuff? People say to me that I changed the way they see this important character to me.... BUT THERE'S NO WAY RIGHT?!?!? I still feel like a drop in the ocean. Just a spec of dust!!! I haven't made real change yet... OR HAVE I?! I DON'T KNOW!!! WAAAHHHH!!!

Maybe.... maybe if I have changed one person's perspective, then maybe it was worth it in the first place...

You know. I wanna say that the reason I came to tumblr was because my irl friends aren't into Splatoon and my family gives me a meh shoulder shrug to my interest. It was so difficult for me to explain Splatoon to my parents when Splatoon 3 came out and I picked up the game at launch! So I went here because I felt like it was the best place to express myself. And yeah I'm glad I stuck with it honestly.

I get why my irl friends aren't into Splatoon, they need to buy a multi hundred dollar console that's about to get replaced soon just to play 2 games. And trying to explain to them Nintendo Wii U and Switch emulation is just... I dont even wanna attempt that HAHAHAHA!!!! So I often felt lonely and it felt like I was screaming into a void when talking about Splatoon to them in a discord server. I guess that's where my sense of loneliness comes from.....

I genuinely have NO ONE in real life to talk to about my interests and have someone ACTUALLY listen. I guess that's why I feel cringe and not cool at all. My interests are so nerdy and I'm on the spectrum, my social skills are like D tier. I genuinely cannot talk about myself, i really cant. Its why i have never been in a romantic relationship before.... As a 20 year old dude, that shit fucking stings I'm not even gonna lie. I think about that shit every day. LITERALLY EVERY DAY I'M NOT LYING!!!!

But anyways, I'm getting way too personal on the internet. I don't wanna be some sad sap.

Thank you. Seriously, thank you. I'm not sure if I truly feel like I deserve love but. Thank you anyways. I guess it is a good quality to have that I can ramble and yap and become really focused on something, even if it's not adult things like... getting a job, paying taxes or whatever HAHAHAHA!

[kanatashinkaifr]

going to talk abt obey me and how they are all extremely neurodivergent!!! gonna go through my thoughts on each characters who stands out to me in one way or another.

Lucifer- he has NPD. dont even try to argue with me about this. from the way he holds himself to an extremely high standard to how hes LITERALLY the avatar of pride, hes just a total narc and I love him dearly. I also consider him to be autistic. half bcuz he shows some signs half bcuz I'm autistic and love projecting onto characters. I think that the way he is so strict and finds being on time so important is extremely autistic of him. he follows a very specific routine, and if said routine is messed with, he is unapproachable for atleast the rest of the day. this is shown in likee late lesson 24 or early lesson 25 I forget. he also has issues with emotions. both showing and I think even identifying them. autistic man. ALSO ptsd. duh.

mammon: adhd. he has adhd. he doesnt have npd, HOWEVER, he totally shows symptoms. he acts like hes on top of the world but the second a minor inconvenience happens he is just. reduced to nothing. I also like the hc of him being dyslexic.

levi: AUTISM AUTISM AUTISM!!! yeah that ones obvious like extremely obvious. stg autism runs into the family or smth cuz it feels like mammon and asmo are the only allistics in that mf house. dont need to explain why Levi is autistic. its obvious. if you really need an explanation just ask. but I also think he has severe social anxiety. like to the point that he gets extremely sick at the thought of social interaction. over the years, and with lots of trial and error medication, he can sort of deal with it now. still freaks him out though.

Satan: I think he takes after his father. like. A LOT. he is so npd and so autistic. I think that he really prides himself on his smarts but like. if he were to fail/get an average mark on a test (especially if lucifer got a high mark) he would disintegrate out of pure self hatred. if lucifer is better than him in any academic topic, you can practically feel the envy and rage coming from him. lucifer understands how he feels, and always tries to help him with his npd issues, but that just upsets him tenfold. "you think that *I* need *YOUR* help??? disgusting!". he has such issues I love him so much. not much to comment on his autism. also quite obvious, especially in nightbringer.

Asmo- I KNOW SO MANY PEOPLE THINK ASMO HAS NPD AND LIKE I GET THE IDEA BUT NO. HE HAS HPD AND I WILL FIGHT TOOTH AND NAIL OVER THAT HC.

beel: autism. binge eating disorder. ptsd.

belphie: autism. BPD!!!!! B!! P!!! D!!!!!!!! I will scream it from the roof tops THAT MAN HAD BPD IDC WHAT YOU SAY!! impulsivity (especially when angry), unstable relations (mostly hc), uncontrolled anger, chronic emptiness (hc), self destructiveness, fear of abandonment. you look into the DSM-5 and there is a picture of him there. I think that. he might have PTSD too.

diavolo: autism. I dont care what anyone says I think he is an autistic woman who was just forced into masking. c-ptsd due to mainly emotional neglect.

solomon: autism. no canon reason to support this I'm just projecting. c-ptsd. he has very complicated feeling surrounding loneliness and abandonment due to his childhood.

simeon: autism. C-PTSD!!!!!!! I think that. there wasnt nessacarily anything that could generally be considered traumatizing. but a lot of things in his early days were extremely stressful for him. I think that hes always questioned the word of God just a bit. he made sure nobody ever found out, but he always had doubt within him. this has always eaten at him, as he is supposed to be an angel. Angel's do not doubt the word of their father,, so, why does he?

ermm okay I think that's. enough ranting for today...

[smilepilled]

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hi. important / significant post for this blog today, very wordy but also very heartfelt. mainly targeted for the 400 milestone + things ive been wanting to say. hopefully the wording isn't too wonky? ❤️‍🩹

thanks if you stop by. might edit this later to make it "less fancy", if it ends up bothering me — dividers and decoration are mainly for organizing it and making it feel like the blog's thing. either way...

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hi, smilepilled/"bug" here (please just call me marcyie); this post will be about things id like to communicate directly to whoever sees it, and something regarding the blog (especially considering the 400 follower milestone). its mainly due to: (1) not wanting people to see me as some cool huge figure and instead just see me as a silly user having fun in my zone, AKA wanting to me treated like just any other random blog; and (2) communicating about intentions regarding people & situations.

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to start off: im not particularly joyous or happy with having ~400 followers or otherwise being "popular"/"known", because im straight up just some old (soon-to-be-legal) teenager who looks at pretty stuff on tumblr autistically. hence why im not planning on commemorating — however, please do know youre all very dear to me! i am very thankful for all the people i've met here ♡ i am a moot-focused account, i follow anyone that follows me, and you're all very much oomphed up in case you followed me.

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i would prefer to avoid any parasocial images from my person, or anything similar like that, so please just keep in mind: im just some random person online! im friendly and all, but please know im not and i dont want to be some "cool tumblr user", im a stranger online that is friendly but most people dont know much about; im just marcyie, the friendly tumblr neighborhood bugthing, treat me as such. i am keen on having understanding and nice interactions with people, but i am not some influencer or whatever. ^_^;

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ADDITIONALLY, a reminder that i personally will always be glad to solve any troubles thru personal "1-on-1" conversation over fights. if u gotta, send me a message and i'll get to it with u! seroously. even if ur fresh from some tense situation with me involved. if u demonstrate willingness to make peace im gonna be just as hearty. i heavily dislike being seen as some unstoppable force or hazard or whatever else — or worse, an opp. :'D i actively go out of my way to NOT be an opp to people, and even if i make mistakes, the intention is very much there, severely so. i really think often about making amends with people who i've had problems with, but since i am unaware of how to do that in a "socially acceptable way", i end up not doing it out of fear of making anything worse. its quite annoying for me, paradoxical as well.

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while i do have very complicated feelings towards a few people who've been in a headache of a situation (indefinite times, and indefinite amounts of people) with me being involved, id like to affirm that the greatest one is that of wanting to just make peace with whatever and whoever i've affected. im aware i say a lot of dumb things in the dumbest ways, and usually its interpreted in the worst possible way — something im painfully aware of, because i am not a english speaker mainly and i have deep problems with communicating what i feel/think with words. i mess up, i jumble up wording, and thats ultimately okay — if i make mistakes, its usually trying to do something good (or something bad towards someone bad, like a racist person, or something similar. which isnt great either!). im glad to be asked apologies of whenever, because most of the time i just end up not realizing that what i say was innapropriate or hurtful, hence creating a lot of the conflicts existing between me & others.

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i can apologize roght now, naturally in a shallower "blanket" way, for things ive said. because i am sorry: and i hope i can be forgiven, but most of all i really just want people to realize that my mistakes are learning experiences, and not things im proud of. im working on a lot, and while im aware some people will just not have the wellbeing or otherwise patience to deal with my erratic behavior, i do ask to be humanized as i often do with others in my head — i am constantly defending people in my head, and while i shouldnt do that for some, i still am hellbent on trying to be humane to others.

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either way, that's all. having 400 followers was very sudden, and as much as i'm thankful, i humbly ask to be treated normally — please do not view me as some cool tumblr blog, big wowzer, a fan-having awesomest, and moreso a seventeen year old autism unit in their corner of the internet where they hype stuff (and people) up. genuinely just a silly blog for me, im not focused on follower counts or influencing or anything — very much the contrary, this is my corner of the internet, for me, not for others. and im glad to meet a lot of people, but i really wont hesitate to archive this and start a new blog entirely for my sake (and others').

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have a lovely day. please remember to eat and drink water, and take breaks! my activity has grown a little lower, and i plan to continue focusing mainly on my real life situations over online stuff. please have a moment to be kind to yourselves, and remember to keep love in your hearts! 💜🩷🤍💛🧡❤️

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TL;DR — please dont "be my fan", be my moot. treat me as some random friendly teenager acquaintance, and not a figure online. also, please remember i make mistakes while aiming to be good & do good; i like people and circles with them, and communicating in general isnt my forté, but i still try my best to be nice and do things properly. i'm more than glad to solve anything with people that needs solving, but since i can often make things worse by caring too much or trying too hard, i'll just leave this note here. thank you for four hundred moots, but please, keep me as a moot and not as a "woawza tumblr user", Please. ❤️‍🩹

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[electricbathsalt]

HELLO HI YOU MENTIONED CHISAKI HAVING A COMPLEX RELATIONSHIP WITH HUMANITY AND I AM HERE TO HAPPY RANT ABOUT IT

it's like 2:30am and i should have gone to bed a while ago so this is gonna be a lil incoherent probably but anyways. yes. 100% yes i love that. i have so many ideas bouncing around my head about chisaki not being human, or like getting some secondary quirk in a secondary quirk wave that *makes* him (in his eyes) less than/not quite human, and also i sometimes use it/its pronouns for him because Reasons (i am projecting my own use of it/its onto him), and I also headcanon him as a) FtMtX (third gender/maverique), b) aroallo and gay and romance-repulsed, and c) autistic + low emotional empathy, and all of those things would 100% play into having a complicated and not-entirely-positive relationship with humanity in general (and his own humanity!) ESPECIALLY given that he spent formative years in the yakuza, which is bound to be a wildly conservative organization and an environment EXTREMELY hostile to several of those core immutable traits. ykno?

anyways you mentioned him having a complex relationship to other people/humans and humanity in general like he doesn't consider himself one so that's what prompted this. also please rant back i want to hear e v e r y t h i n g

Oh my god oh my god YES!! Okay I actually just woke up (yes my sleep schedule is fucked rn) so this is most definitely not gonna be coherent either buuut bro that is SO SIMILAR TO EXACTLY WHAT I WAS THINKINGGG

Okay this is by far the most difficult topic for me to try to articulate/explain bc I don’t really know how to, but I will try my damndest!! Yes. I think Chisaki has a very, very complicated relationship with both his own humanity and humanity as whole, in the way that he like. Does not view himself as human, and does not think of humans as the same as him, because they are on, like, separate playing fields. It’s not that he necessarily thinks of everyone else as worthless, or that he’s above them inherently (unequal)—he believes himself to be in a sort of limbo. He is neither worthless nor worthy. He is not human, therefore he cannot adhere to the same principles and standards of humanity. He is not human, and that is why he is never treated like one.

I think he subconsciously detached himself from it. He hated how the one person he (subconsciously) thought would one day view him as human and accept him, called him a monster and outcast him, like everyone else. The one person who showed him kindness with no catch (in his mind, because… yikes). That’s when he fully accepted that he’ll never be seen as human, that he is not human, and will never be treated like something with value/emotion, like something mortal and thinking and multi-dimensional, which is why he finally decided to just take matters into his own hands, with no regard to anything else. Why follow the morals of humans if he is not one? You don’t expect a wild animal not to maul you. Because for an animal, it is necessary. There’s no malice. They hunt and kill you because they need to eat and feed and protect. Is that not him? Is he not doing all this out of necessity? To keep himself and his family alive?

(Although, he doesn’t perceive himself as an animal. Just as not human). He believes he can’t be human. He believes he can no longer allow himself to be human anyway, because being human is too large an obstacle to his goals. He has to be a monster.

And kinda on the side of how he perceives other humans—it’s like, he’s more vital than them to the plan (which is the most important thing in the world), so he is above them in the way they are pawns whereas the plan cannot happen without him and Eri. But it’s dependent on his quirk, bc without his quirk, he is no longer Overhaul, who is the one who is vital to the plan; he is just Chisaki Kai. Chisaki Kai was not vital to anything and was just some not-really-human with a debt to pay off. Chisaki Kai is not worthwhile. Chisaki Kai is below other, real humans. So it’s split—Overhaul is above everyone else (in importance, in the fact he is not human. He is a monster). Chisaki Kai is below everyone else (he is indebted and clinging to the dregs of humanity he wants to have). The common ground is that both Overhaul and Chisaki Kai are inhuman accessories to the Shie Hassaikai. The Shie Hassaikai is more important than them.

He does not yearn to be human, he yearns for the casual acceptance and belonging that comes alongside being human. Humans have never treated him like how they treat other humans. He is not human.

Uggfhhhh I can’t tell if I’m explaining this exactly how I mean it. My vocabulary is just lacking I fear 😭 I have trouble streamlining my thoughts a lot. I feel like I have more to say but no way to properly express it, I guess. Also all your headcanons are extremely real and definitely add onto this/play a part in it!! I cannot imagine that the Yakuza would be all that accepting/an at all safe environment (ah. Well. That’s not true bc I have lol. I don’t like making sad stories 💀 but in canon… definitely not. Especially with Pops’ apparent falling-out with his daughter over her marriage 😒).

I don’t know if this all is what you had in mind or not but I think it has at least some semblance to what I think some of his mindsets are. My brain is a lil fried though. Also please please please elaborate. On everything. I wanna hear all your takes

[necronatural]

Here's my review of the ANN Ryoko Kui interview

No one asked but the visceral reaction people had was just so funny I'd like to have some clarity in how I view it from my personal perspective

-An opener to get to know Ryoko Kui personally that whiffed hard because the manga did not come from the mind of someone who likes to cook and experiment with food

-A question about Ryoko Kui's favourite dish. As she had such an empty answer for the previous question and many had heard of Ryoko Kui's picky eating this question is like a slow motion train wreck. It was popular to talk about but most people still wouldn't have heard about the picky eating thing so this is a good thing to have in an article

-The only truly, intrinsically unforgivable question: "OBVIOUSLY you like TTRPGs". Ryoko Kui will not stop fucking talking about CRPGs. The main party was conceived of as a Wizardry OC party. She constantly absolutely nonstop makes references to Wizardry. I'm going to get a headache that there was a possibility of asking her if she has ever played Fallout 1 and the interview is just so uneducated on her creative influences that this opportunity slipped through their fingers. This question makes me want to microwave my own eyeballs so I don't have to watch someone whiff this bad

-Baldur's Gate 3 isn't going to save that. I can't believe the followup question wasn't about CRPGs. Does the interviewer know what a CRPG is? I genuinely have to ask

-Pretty good softball question about worldbuilding.

-Tapping into the most interesting aspect of the main character by asking about personal influences in crafting such a person

-The follow-up about the idea of a 'perfect monster' really feeds into her "I made it up" perspective of her worldbuilding and more of her personal influences. It paints a picture of her process that I find really similar to my own and that's neat :)

-This is like, the most artisanal fucking question about disability and identification you could POSSIBLY do and I'm not kidding. Lead with the scene that caused the most discussion. Refer to the readers who relate to this deeply autistic experience in their fight. Ask if this resonance was on purpose. Circle back to the Laois-Toshiro conflict, the real root of the interaction. I think it's like...the west, specifically the US, has this really bizarre individuality and fascination with tidy little boxes to fit into, so it's incredibly disarming for a lot of people that she like...answered the main question. Laios is written as a relatable, accessible character. Those autistic experiences you mentioned hindered his ability to interact with Shuro, but Shuro was hindered from engaging with Laios by his own burdens. She talks about this inability to weigh each other's circumstances causing strife. Which is pretty straightforward! But people wanted the validation of the little box. Doomed question but not a whiff

-The Laios question was so well-crafted and meticulously designed to communicate to Kui why the question about the fight left such an impact, but the Senshi one is like the TTRPG one; just assuming shit of her that is obviously not the case. If I wrote this I would comment on the dichotomy between Senshi's very obviously silly and non-erotic panty shots and the incredible care she puts into illustrating him as handsome and cool (i.e. that chapter cover) in serious moments. It is a miracle of fucking god this whiff ended with us obtaining such a funny and direct answer and Kui found the influence interesting to bring it into the interview but it's still awful form to ask this

-WHY WOULD YOU FOLLOW UP ON THAT. LET IT GO

-The question about Marcille's outfit is really neat! I think it's cool to get confirmation on its roots, and the mother/baby influences really make you think

-Mediocre question about farcille. Again, there wasn't a lot of care put into this and the shipping seems more important than curiosity about how she views the intensity of her own writing. This question did not whiff & gave us something interesting but you really can't help but be annoyed when you're more interested in why she wrote them that way and not if Kui blesses your OTP

-Ending it on the Izutsumi question ties into the interview also ending I like the pacing of it and leaves me thoughtful and reminiscing on the series. Good one

FINAL SCORE

It was simply mid. 💔

[clownrecess]

As an autistic individual myself, I am interested in the intersection of neurodiversity and various identities.

You've mentioned that you identify as a Norse Pagan. I'm curious about how your spiritual beliefs intersect with your neurodivergent experience. Do you find that your autistic identity informs or impacts your spiritual practice in any way?

(Tw for discussions of trauma, religion, etc.)

Sorry for the late-ish response! I've been working on this post a little everyday to make sure I write it how I want it.

I dont think that my autism has impacted my religion or spirtual experiences/beliefs, but my brain as a whole does. (Update: It actually did influence it quite a bit. I'm realizing this after writing this post. So, uh, thank you for helping me realize something that I find quite interesting!)

When I was a kid, I was raised in christianity. I was very religious. I prayed everyday, I had a cross in my room, etc.

But heres the thing: I have OCD. A few different types, but out of those, one of them is religious OCD.

Most of my praying ages late 8-12 was done purely out of fear. At that point I wasnt even really a Christian, I was just really afraid, which really impacted how I viewed religion. I HATED conversation about it because it felt scary and icky to me.

I didn't understand why people would ever want to talk about it. It felt like a very private topic for me, so I figured people who go out of their way to talk about it must be trying to get extra "good points" with god (maybe that bit was caused by autism, actually.).

During that time, I would go through little phases of a month or so at a time in which I would try to "swing the opposite direction". This was around age 10-11. I was developing an intense anger toward the church, and I just wanted to be the opposite of they were, whatever that meant. Because I didn't want to think about religion (due to anxiety around it), I really didn't know what many religious labels actually meant because researching them made me very uncomfortable, so I briefly identified as a satanist (this would be on and off during ages 10-11.) despite really not knowing what that meant. I think I just wanted a way to separate myself from the church as much as possible.

A few months after I turned 12, I felt a really strong urge to research paganism out of nowhere (I didnt even know what "pagan" meant, I just suddenly felt the need to know things about it. It was very random.). It started sort of as a special interest (Maybe autism did influence me more than I thought! Interesting.), and so I would look into a lot of different branches of paganism, focusing most of my research around hellenistic paganism.

A few weeks after this, I had a very interesting experience which I now believe to have been a sign from Freyja (I dont want to go into specifics. It was personal and I want to keep that special to me. I might later, but for now it's just mine. Just know it was a very beautiful thing from her.). DIRECTLY following this event (Maybe an hour or two later), I felt another urge to research things, but this time to be looking into the Norse Gods/Goddesses (which I'd never even heard of at that point.).

At that point I ended up converting to paganism. It was an extremely sudden decision, but it made sense to me.

No matter what religion I had been apart of before, I always felt anxiety and guilt, causing me to try and fix things by becoming excessively religious again in a Christian way. But from the moment I became pagan, I just never had that ever again. It's been the only religion I've ever felt fully safe in.

It's obviously been quite a while since then, and I'm obviously still a Norse Pagan.

Whilst I now love all the gods and goddesses, Freyja will always be especially special to me.

At this point I have worked with: Freyja, Loki, Odin, Beyla, and Njord.

Now, I also think its important to mention another part of my brain that impacts my religious experience: I am in a system.

Nearly all of us identify as Norse Pagans, but we have a few Agnostics as well, a few Eclectic Pagans, an Atheistic Satanist, and a Theistic Satanist.

The primary religious identity within our system is Norse Paganism, with the majority of individuals identifying as followers of this belief system. Due to this, we say we are a Norse Pagan! We are also okay with just being called "Pagan" on it's own, though.

[honeyblve]

I've never really posted anything in regards to the Sturniolo triplets before but I've been a fan for around a year and follow several fan accounts on here and elsewhere. I'm an older fan (26) and tend to mind my business but to be quite honest the Nick situation has been weighing on me ever since the infamous stream happened. I know at this point people are probably tired of hearing everyones opinion but I feel like I need to get it off my chest as someone who has a degree in psychology, has worked with special needs children, and who also has a little brother who is autistic and deaf.

Seeing a lot of people defend what Nick has said has been truly heart breaking in so many ways. I'm also very saddened by the vile things people have been saying towards/about him to "cancel" him or add other things he's done into the mix. Body shaming, being homophobic, or just being an asshole does not help the situation at all and are equally as disgusting. I adore Nick and do not condone any of the hate he is receiving and I certainly don't believe he should be cancelled but I'd rather hold him accountable than kiss his ass in this situation.

Regarding his comments towards stimming and Helen Keller, to say I'm disappointed in an understatement. And the longer he goes without addressing it, the more disappointed I get. The comments about Helen Keller are so disheartening because she played such an important role in the advancement of study and resources for the hearing and visually impaired. To use her as a way to insult people in chat is wild. I'm very thankful to Chris and Matt, especially Chris, for leading the conversation on how that wasn't okay pretty much immediately. I really appreciate that they started holding him accountable even though Nick immediately doubled down because he thought it was "funny." Just as a FYI regarding Nicks comments, addressing someone with/as their disability isn't this "cooky, funny thing" he was trying to make it out to be. Don't do that shit. It's rude and dehumanizing as hell. My younger brother is autistic and deaf. Both are not noticeable at first glance, however, there are things that he does that help him navigate life that people close to him would notice. For his entire life, I have watched him struggle with simple things due to people's judgements and lack of accessibility. People constantly made fun of him growing up and he struggles to this day to find a place to fit in and feel normal. It's heartbreaking to watch your sibling struggle in a world that does not seek to understand or provide any resources to make their life easier. This is why Nick making comments to Chris hurt so much from me. My brother and I have viscously fought countless times and have said really hurtful things over 20+ years but NOT ONCE have I ever thrown insults about stimming or anything like that in his face. Even if he wasn't officially diagnosed, I would never think of using that to make fun of him. Not only does he beat himself up about it enough but he has received so much bullying already that I would hate myself if I ever contributed to it. This also makes me think of the many times Nick has made digs at Matt for the way he is and his anxiety. It really upsets me that Nick seems to have this skewed perspective about very serious issues simply because it's his brothers. You would think that there would be more grace and understanding rather than judgement because its his siblings but I digress...

As someone who went to school for psychology and has a degree in it, hearing him say the words "stimming out like a psychopath" made my jaw drop. I genuinely had to take a second because I was so taken back by that statement. There is already such a stigma around mental health, autism, and neurodiversity and the fact that he said that so flippantly in front of thousands of people was appalling. These types of things only perpetuate the idea that stimming is "weird" or "off-putting" and that having issues with mental health makes you less than. Don't even get me started on the use of psychotic as an insult. That diagnosis is not a joke, it's a very real thing and it makes my blood boil that it was used the way it was. People who are autistic, have mental health issues, or are ND face so many struggles everyday simply because the world is not built for them. There have been decades of work put into the destigmatization of these things and these individuals and their family are still struggling to get the resources they need and to educate the general public. They are not weird or unusual. They are not any less valuable as human beings. They deserve the same respect and love that anyone else deserves and they have a right to live in a world that doesn't shun and isolate them. The triplets have so many impressionable fans that Nick saying this could not only hurt those people who do "stim" but also reinforce the negative opinion about these issues and encourage bullying even more. This is why several people have talked about the concern that Nicks behavior is creating "mean girls" within the fandom. Yes, I'm calling out y'all that are defending him and openly admitting to being ableist, as well.

People have every right to hold Nick accountable for what he says and does. They also have the right to do that for Chris and Matt. Not only is that what should be done especially for influencers but it should be done for EVERYONE. Nick is a 21 year old man. He is not a child. He should be able to understand why what he said is wrong and own up to that and apologize. If he can't, that is a an incredibly immature and, quite frankly, disgusting and off putting character flaw. Part of growing up is learning to grow from mistakes and educated yourself in all types of situations. If he isn't mature enough to handle that and educate himself then he shouldn't be on the internet. Period. I'm also sick of the comments saying "no one would do any of this if Matt of Chris has said it".... Yes. Yes they would have. And dare I say, there wouldn't be as many people defending them because fans love to use Nick being "sassy" and having "dark and dry humor" to excuse anything remotely problematic he does. Matt's behavior has been equally as difficult to watch in some instances too (the whole chair thing) and him going along with Nick to pick on Chris was just as bad. However, we had so many streams while Nick was away where there were no issues and the second Nick gets back the dynamic changes. I think it's evident that Nick or, at the very least, his attitude is the common denominator is what's going on.

The argument of them being brothers is exhausted at this point and I'm sick of hearing about it. Can siblings have banter and be rough with each other? Yes. Can those words and actions cross a line? ABSOLUTELY. For example, my father grew up with a very bad situation with his siblings and things that his sisters said to him when he was 6 years old still psychologically and emotionally hurts him at 58. To think that what Nick - or any of the brothers - say or do to each other doesn't affect them is such an ignorant take. I can tell you from witnessing it in my own life and through my studies, people have completely cut off family members for things similar to how Chris has been treated in this situation. Do I think Chris was horribly hurt by it and is going to cut Nick out of his life? No, he probably saw it a just the usual fighting. However, things like that can only chip away at someone for so long before it hits the fan. In my opinion, I see these digs from Nick slowly having an affect on both Chris and Matt until they've had enough one day. The fact that they are triplets does not mean shit when it comes to constantly berating someone and there is so much research within psychology that proves this! Go argue with a wall.

I feel like I should also mention that it's been very evident lately that Nick's attitude is off. Many people have noticed it and it's been going on for a while. As an older fan, the way he's been behaving lately has made me cringe and honestly not want to watch a lot of their content. I'm not sure what's going on there. It could be ego, it could be burn out, frustration, or anxiety or he could have simply just picked up bad habits and now they're integrated into his personality. Who knows. All I know is it's off-putting. I'm not going to watch a 30 minute video or a several hour live stream to see him yelling at his brothers or the viewers. That's not entertaining. It's embarrassing and ruins the vibes and, as we're seeing now, it's biting him in the ass and people are going to stop watching them all together.

[saturn-sends-hugs]

Fuck it, I’m seeing a lot of talk about Echo being a picky eater recently and I think I want to add my two neurodivergent cents to it lol

Firstly, I think it’s important to note that Echo is autistic. I know this hasn’t been stated anywhere or anything, but listing out his character quirks makes it pretty clear.

He repeats orders, arguing with his batch when they don’t follow them, and worries about doing things wrong. This feels like a safety thing to me, almost like telling kids in class to be quiet when the teacher is talking for no other reason than it feels right and them breaking rules is stressful. (can you tell I’m speaking from experience cause this whole post will be me speaking from experience bkshsjsks)

He reads and memorizes the reg manuals, liking to be caught up on the latest versions. Again, this feels like a safety thing; him wanting to know how things will work ahead of time so he can be prepared in every situation.

He doesn’t like being wrong, like when we see him refusing to back down on thinking the Seperatists Senator’s distress call is a trap (Avi Singh I think?). Even when the evidence starts poking holes in his theory, he doesn’t want to let it go. I’m not sure how to explain how this relates to autism other than that fact that autistic people just don’t like being wrong? Like it’s just hard to admit that and it’s almost scary to change your mind like that sometimes? Idrk honestly, I’m DEFINITELY not an expert lol, just saying my piece

So many of Echo’s character quirks relate directly to autism, and all of them are things I strongly relate to. (yes this is why he’s my favorite shush)

But most of all is his picky eating. And uh, this might actually get a tad heavy here but I hope this can maybe share an accurate perspective on it?

Many autistic people are fairly picky eaters, something I’ve definitely struggled with since I was born. We see Echo being skeptical of food multiple times, especially when they’re new to him. We see him eating rations bars, which would be familiar, without a second thought, but new things he’s extremely hesitant to try.

With that in mind and the headcanon (kinda) that he’s autistic, this sounds a lot like ARFID to me.

ARFID (Avoidant Restrictive Food Intake Disorder) is tricky to describe since there’s nothing conscious to it, its just somewhat of a mental hurdle? Like there’s a point you just can’t cross no matter what, a bit like ADHD and executive dysfunction, expect a lot stronger lol. It’s pretty much just picky eating to the extreme that a person cannot control and just makes your choices extremely limited when it comes to food.

This makes it difficult (ahem, impossible) to do seemingly basic things like trying absolutely any new foods. There are a few safe ones, maybe even a category of foods that are almost completely safe (for me: most deserts or fruits), but anything outside of that is different, it’s new, and it does not feel safe. When I say picky eating to the extreme, I mean extreme. If I’m literally starving, haven’t eaten in way too long, but the only things available aren’t safe foods? Well too bad guess I’m not eating today 🤷 It’s not much of a choice, it’s just being trapped by your own neurodivergent brain 🫠🫠🫠

It can feel childish and incredibly alienating to constantly turn down new foods or restaurants, or to order the same thing every time from a restaurant, off the kids menu or with special requests, and I just think that piece is being missed in Echo’s picky eating. Now I’m not telling anyone to stop making it a humorous thing cause it totally is in the show, but hey, I’m always here for the angst potential :)

Like what if the reason Echo still looks malnourished after joining the batch is because his safe foods like typical rations just aren’t readily available after the Empire springs up? What if the batch is on shore leave and decide to go to a restaurant and Echo has to either turn them down and explain, or force himself to go and try to tough it out? What if one of the batch makes a joke about Echo’s picky eating, just trying to make conversation or something, but Echo just fully shuts down? Maybe even Domino would joke about it at first, until Fives learned better and started helping Echo, but uhoh now he’s gone and Echo has to figure things out all over again with a new batch 🥲

Is this a fictional character that was grossed out by foods like two times and I’m just heavily projecting onto? Yeah, sure, but hey, I’d love to see more people recognizing this side of it and maybe connecting with it too :)

@gentle-hero-blog thanks for letting me sob abt this literally the minute u got home bkshsjskk <3333

[ruthlesslistener]

Tbh I'm really not sure if you are a hot-head or just don't always understand that not everyone is arguing with you when they present ideas that don't align with your headcanons. I also hate how you and your followers use the whole "No reading compression" in response to that sometimes. Like dude, some people are just sharing their own perspectives? On what maye have happened in Canon? Maybe its you and your cronies that dont have proper reading compression because damm, not everyone is out to fight you over stuff. Explanations are not arguments.

I really wish you were kinder to them because you sound like a passive aggressive bully at times alongside your followers and friends. (And since you love to think this way, no it's not in relation to the Ghost and vessel discussion since that's the easiest way you can hide behind. I just hate the way you acted and responded to some of your asks when it was clear that some were just trying to explain stuff. And how your followers are... comforting you? Even though its you who is in the wrong?)

? Anon I don't think that I outright argue with people unless it's clear that they're being outright aggressive, though that could be because yes, I am a legitimate hothead (though I do my best to keep my temper in check). And I am blunt as fuck. And I am also very very bad at reading tone, including my own. And also a way that I like to respond to ideas that are different from my own is by explaining how I see things or what I enjoy from it, because that makes it easiest to compare and contrast them. I genuinely don't mind people having different interpretations from me, but a lot of the times they just don't mesh with me for personal reasons, so I explain how my pov differs so that both of us are on equal footing. I'm not arguing or debating, I'm trying to clarify

I also thought I was pretty clear that some of my takes are extremely opinionated and were not necessarily valid because of it. If not, I apologize. But I am very opinionated, and yes that does influence my views on things, and no that doesn't mean I am always right. But also fandom is a hobby for a reason, and if I don't get enjoyment out of something, I will say it. That doesn't mean its bad, it's just that I don't really care for it and dont want to engage with it because it doesn't bring me any joy. I mean, I fucking hate caramel and will say it with vigor but that doesn't mean that I think that caramel is actually bad or awful or that people who like it are wrong for enjoying it. I just happen to really fucking hate it and say it loudly so that nobody gives me caramel when I wanted chocolate. That's pretty much how I view 99% of fandom takes different than my own- if I see it in the tags when browsing, I just scroll past it, but if someone brings it into my inbox then I'm going to explain why I don't like it so that they know it's a preference and don't do it again. I really don't mean to be hostile here

Most of the 'no reading comprehension' thing that I got pissy at that I can think of was when people would say something to me in response to what I said that completely missed the point of what I said entirely, in which case I got irritated at the misinterpretations because it was clear that what they had gotten from my discussion was not what I was actually saying. They could be valid in some cases, but that doesn't really matter when they're arguing something that was never a point in the conversation to begin with. I also tend to go to people I know for secondhand interpretations of things because- and this is very important- I am autistic as fuck and come from a background where a lot of what I would say would be taken with offense so that a fight could be started. So I tend to approach topics that I can't get a read on by debating them, to try to mitigate the damage before it happens. I don't take offense to them at all, I actually did enjoy the explanations that people had, but I countered with my own feelings on the matter because I wanted people to know my own pov in turn and how I thought of things differently than them. I'm very sorry if that seemed argumentative or passive-aggressive, because I genuinely did not mean it that way. I actually really enjoy debating different takes! That's what my favorite thing to do with friends is! But sometimes other takes just don't mesh with me and I want to explain why that is so that people don't think I'm bashing them. Sorry if that came off as arguing because it really wasn't on my end

(I'm also not sure what you mean by 'hide behind the adult Ghost discussion'- that's the first discourse I've had in my inbox in a very, very long time, so that's why I tend to default to it being the problem. I'm not hiding behind it I just assume that a lot of the asks I get arguing about vessel age originate from that discussion bc that was the last point of contention. Unless there's some other thing going on that I'm not aware of...?)

Anyways I'm sorry that I come off that way but keep in mind that I am also very autistic and a.) might come off as rude or argumentative when I'm actually just talking normally and b.) like to counter people's explanations with my own bc I actually do genuinely enjoy comparing and contrasting headcanons. I genuinely don't try to come off as passive-aggressive (unless its on purpose, in which case I will make it very obvious), I am just very opinionated and very, very blunt. I'll try to add more tone-context descriptors to my replies in the future to counter this, but please do know that I'm genuinely not judging anyone for having different headcanons than I am, I just know what I like and what I don't and am very straightforward about it. This is a hobby for me, so if there's something I don't like or don't have fun talking about, I'll say it directly

[calicohyde]

Happy STS! What is the best novel you've ever read? What did you like about it, from a storytelling perspective? Has it influenced or informed your own approach?

*instantly forgets every book i've ever read in my life*

in the name of. having an answer. i will pick The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. i don't remember it well enough after so long after having read it (and i've only read it the once) to pick out specific storytelling mechanics, but i do remember being impressed and thinking it was very well done in addition to having a lot of important things to say and being engaging and entertaining. i also remember i had borrowed it, and then texted the friend i'd borrowed it from to ask if he had the next book and if i could come pick it up right then. at 3AM.

one particular thing about the TGWTDT original trilogy (the only ones i personally count as "canon" lol) that really stuck out to me as unique and special to me personally and that i've wanted to see more of since - and am planning to be the change i want to see wrt - are its quote unquote "unlikeable" protagonists.

lisbeth is autistic and point blank refuses to mask, and in addition she's acerbic and angry and tends to reach violence as a much sooner resort than many, she's not exactly arrogant but she would never even dream of not taking credit and representing her skills accurately or god forbid using upspeak, she simply does not follow rules (or conventions or etiquette) she thinks are stupid and she's vocal and unapologetic about it, she's an actual genuine punk and fucks severely and without romance (until mikael), and as far as i remember she never once says sorry to anyone for anything no matter what. i love her with every fiber of my being.

mikael is a workaholic which is not unique, except that everyone hates his guts for being so single-minded and rigid and unavailable, which is, and which i really liked. of course people would not find him fun to be around. he also is arrogant, and a hypocrite, and can be unkind. and these two are the best good guys we've got! (this is also why i discount the opinion of anyone who claims mikael is a "romanticized" self-insert on larsson's part like bruhhh.... just cuz they have the same job? this bitch is not a romanticized version of anyone or anything he's a fucking rat bastard who happens to also be a good man smdh. i mean maybe he is a self-insert but not a fucking romanticized one! he sucks! i'm passionate about this.)

i also really liked the age range of the characters and the polyamory and the queers. additionally, larsson has a really unique and fascinating writing style (which critics have attributed to his writing career starting in investigative journalism before he ever did creative writing or fiction). i think it fits absolutely perfectly with the protagonists and the subject matter, and the way those things match up and meld together makes the series so much more absorbing.

but yeah i always liked a writing style and a narrative voice that was fitted to the characters/content, and i think larsson did it particularly well - even if it's a sort of chicken or egg situation with him. we'll never know since he died of those Natural Causes before he could write anything else and all. anyway! i would have done this regardless, because literally all of my favorite authors do it to some degree, which is why they are my favorite authors. (much of what people say are benefits you can "only" get from first person narration i feel you can get just as well from a limited third person, if you uh. try.) but yeah TGWTDT is a stand-out example!

i also can't necessarily give TGWTDT/larsson credit for my life long love affair with angry and contrarian good guys, but again it's a stand-out example and an aspiration in this.

thank you for the ask, nico!! <3

[haven-gum-rockrose]

tell us about riz (ask game)

RIZ RIZ RIZ BET

first impression: oh this boy has so much frantic energy omg and cares so much about this penny girl he tries so hard, hes completely not sleeping to find his only friend...... Fuck I'm gonna end up kinning this guy, aren't I. And then it just kept going

impression now: ...... he cares. so. much. i care so much. its everything and he is everything to me- i actually dont know how to express it. he's like- holy. literally, he works for heaven now. but thats not important, he is.

Favorite moment....... fuck.... hmm... god i really like his interactions with Kalina. it could be "hiss at her, litigator!" followed by him hissing in court, but thats more a fig thing so.... while its not necessarily the moment, i like what it came to mean for his character. Him stuck in the palimpsest at the arcade, having lost to Penny's game, cutting his hands digging through the crystals, simply because that is so often referred back to

HONORABLE MENTIONS BECAUSE HES MY LITTLE GUY AND FUCK IT WE BALL: "i'm really gonna spiral here" after getting his own private office to do pi shit in, him suggesting "we can throw rocks in the river" as a hangout option because his only experience with what hangouts are like comes from violent productive adventuring and also noir mystery films/books/games, Riz inventinting the Night Yorb because he couldnt just relax. HIM TALKING TO HIS MOM ABOUT LIKE- IDFK WHAT TO DO WITH MYSELF OR HOW TO INTERACT WITH MY FRIENDS IF THERES NOT A PROBLEM I CAN SOLVE- like shoot me with a fucking gun why dont you- uhhhhhh... "its just a metal tube. i think its beautiful *and then i do a little dance*" ..... theres a lot imma shut up

Story idea....... shit- him hanging out with the seven. please. idk, im very content with my- WAIT NO i wouldnt write about him, but any fanfic where he interacts with jawbone(like as the guidance counselor, not as the dad of most of his friends) - head in hands-

unpopular opinion: shipping fabriz is fine. like i dont like it and any ship stuff for them i read(which i do read) i am personally interpreting as platonic cuz im really good at that, or unrequited. i know a lot of people get pressed about it cuz aroace erasure which yeah if youre changing him to demi thats a bit- or if its one of those "Pok was right, he might just be a late bloomer, lol theyre aged up and actually riz finds out he's pan lololol" thats a bit - like please stop. but if hes dating the guy as an aroace person or theyre qpring. whats the big deal. i know riz doesnt want a relationship and all but - that the point of shipping? like i know for some people its uncomfy especially with how its the most popular d20 ship(at least based on ao3), but to me its like- shipping is literally pushing together characters and its always purely self indulgent??? like ship whoever you want as long as he stays aroace. anyways i didnt need to justify myself and show both arguements like that. none of you know this guy. except two people hi eni and aether

favorite relatioship: ..... LISTEN IGNORE EVERYTHING I JUST SAID. FABIAN AND RIZ THEY ARE BEST FRIENDS FABIAN SEACASTER AND THE FUCKING BALL LIKE THEYVE COME SO FAR IN THEIR DYNAMIC ITS CHANGED SO MUCH - theyre so opposites theyre everything theyre everything THEY SHOULDNT BE FRIENDS! AND THEYRE NOT!! THEYRE BEST FRIENDS!!!! AUGH!!!

favorite headcanon: autistic and anxious...... uh..... my brain is very gone... i think he still has like a bunch of different friendship bracelets from Penny that he keeps in like little collectors cases. ALSO I DONT THINK SHE EVER GAVE THEM TO HIM I THINK THEY WOULD JUST LIKE APPEAR ON HIS WRIST SHE WAS SLEIGHT OF HANDING THOSE SHITS ONETO HIS WRISTS BECAUSE HE COMPLAINED IT DIDNT MATCH HIS AESTHETIC AND THEN SHED LEAVE AND HE BE LIKE- im gonna frame this and put in on my wall.... but like as in in a false bottom in a drawer so its cooler

[randomkposts]

In your opinion, would fem mello be a 'not-like-other-girls'

E:-  Mello might be like that unironically. 

K:- expand?

E:- Mello breaks the conformity of what is seen to be as socially acceptable in femininity

K:- and masculinity

E:-Mello as abrasive as she is, I can't genuinely add her with the misogyny attitude of 'I'm not like other girls' that is a sub branch of 'pick me' girls. Both are taken with the goal of putting down other women in order to elevate themselves. 

K:- you make a good point. 

E:- Especially with our Mello. Thank you!

I detest that sort of attitude since it's seen as a part of "feminism", but breaks it instead of strengthening it.

Besides that, Mello is Mello, she does her own rules and likes what she likes. She might've been coming off that, however she isn't going to make it her personality. 

K:-"I'm not like other girls" is putting other girls down in an attempt to differentiate yourself from them, at their expense. .. and yours. Have some solidarity.

E:-Lmao. When i read that last part I can imagine Mello walking away but turn around and jabs a finger at whoever is acting like this

"Have some fucking solidarity."

K:-"I l'm not like other girls, I'm not obsessed with makeup".

"Ok then, I'm sure you have your own weird obsessions that other people roll their eyes at you over, but you don't see me bringing it up as a topic of conversation with you."

E:-Also it does point out that yes most of our fem versions of L Near Mello and Matt aren't the usual form of "general" social acceptance however none of them are going to tear down other women who do follow feminine traits. 

K:-I don't do makeup really, but if someone has put the time into it to develop skill at it, then good on them.

E:-Especially ones like Takada, Naomi and yes even Misa can be added. 

Yes! That too! I love light and bright soft colors and dresses. I can't always wear them due to weather and work.

While yes if we wanna continue the ye old inner misogyny self hatred maybe Mello did have this stemming from other outer interactions outside of Whammy. 

K:-As foil to Mello, Light would do that unironically in the opposite way.

Light hates everyone in this, and will dunk on boys and girls.

"You've never played a video game?"

"What am I a boy? Why would I waste my time on that."

"You've never had a spa day?"

"I'm not like other girls, I don't waste my time on that" except not outloud, just inner monologue for both.

E:-As looking at Whammy.....they genuinely don't seem to give a shit about normalcy. 

They should invest in Social Public cues as a class mandatory seeing all their geniuses are inept. 

K:-"That kid can be a autistic as they want, all that matters here is that they can solve murders."

E:-Agreed. "As far as I am concerned, I take my studies seriously. Enjoy your spa, your nails seem to be neglected."

Mello can also toss that attitude with the best arm shot she can cause she has seen all types of geniuses at Whammy's so fuck that type of thinking. 

K:- A Class social ,as other people see it.

"I know half of you dont care to interact with other people in real life, but its important to learn how they think, to understand possible motives behind murders, if nothing else. So as stupid as it sounds, being possessive of another person under the guise of love, is plenty of reason to commit murder. Apparently. We will now cover that angle in detail."

E:-"Today we learn why humans tend to act aggressively to commit murder when they aren't receiving intercourse. And decide to blame women for their woes."

Hey, Funny thoughts like unrelated to this, DN needs you to accurately write names and correct face right. Imagine someone getting a face tattoo only to cover it with make up lmak. Lmaooo. 

K:-I think enough of a facial Tattoo might count as enough to mess with the Shinigami eyes, but I think something permanent like a tattoo would eventually count as a part of your face, in contrast to something temporary like a scarf.

E:-Yeah but like is anyone gonna check if you cover it with makeup consistently.

K:-It never came up in death note, because its set in Japan. It should have been a problem when Light had to interact with Amarica. I think it depends on the makeup. 

Like maybe if it was massive clown makeup or something. 

E:-I mean lets be real someone gonna have to done that at some point never update anyone kept it private. You seen makeup gurus right. Freaking magic with contours. 

K:-I don't know, Tattoos are not always something you can get in one session. 

E:-Small. Get a mini bee tattoo. 

K:-And they need time to heal. Would be hard to keep a secret. 

E:-Put a bandage and go "I got my ass handed to me."

K:-Several times in the same place?

E:-No, since tattoo's generally depend on how long it takes. Some can be done in a couple hours and can be small. 

Shit K I can tattoo a mini soup character and cover it up

K:-We are forgetting about fake tattoos! Which are temporary, and so changeable. 

E:-AHAHAHA! I was gonna bring that up but went meme later.

K:- wait. Let me look up the rules. 

"A side view of a person's face is enough to be able to see their name and lifespan. A person's eyes must be visible in order for it to work, but if they are wearing sunglasses while their entire face is visible, it will work. It will also work If half a person's face is seen vertically.

Circumstances where the Shinigami Eyes will not work to see a person's name and lifespan include seeing the back of a person's head, seeing the lower half of their face (i.e. eyes are not visible), and seeing their body but not their face.

A photograph of a person is also acceptable, and follows the same rules as listed above. The only exception to this is when the person in the picture is deceased, in which case their name and lifespan will not be visible. "

Or formally. -

"In order to see the names and life spans of humans by using the eye power of the god of death, the owner must look at more than half of that person's face. When looking from top to bottom, he must look at least from the head to the nose. If he looks at only the eyes and under, he will not be able to see the person's name and life span. Also, even though some parts of the face, for example the eyes, nose or mouth are hidden, if he can basically see the whole face, he will be able to see the person's name and life span. It is still not clear how much exposure is needed to tell a person's name and lifespan, as this needs to be verified."

E:-Mmmm

K:-Tattoos might not work

E:-If half is covered then they can't see it.No no wait

K:-But masking and wearing sunglasses would

E:-We aren't taking in people or ex convicts who do try to cover up half their tattoos. 

Who says a convicted man can't use foundation?!Society?!

*slaps hand on podium* NAY I SAY MAKEUP IS ARMOR!

K:-Nothing against foundation. But I think its getting at face shape being important. 

So the question is, would wigs, hoodies, or religious coverings be any protection?

I mean, a Burqa deff would be more then enough protection. 

E:-Oh totes. Man Covid fucks up Kira's day didn't it. 

K:-Yes. But just a mask might not be enough. So sunglasses to be safe. Mellos burn scar did not protect him from kira murder. Makeup would protect someone from Light, but not Misa, Is what I guess I'm saying. Or Mikami.

Sunglasses that would protect one from the shinigami Eyes, Eclipse!

E:-Damn hack eyes. Oh well guess its back to the traditional misspelling foreign names or wrong kanji. we gotta give those sunglasses to L. 

K:-Maybe If Misora had worn a wig, and makeup, Light would have ignored her. But she had no reason to go to that length of deception to the public at that point in time, as they still didn't know the how.

Look, If I could have a way to keep it without being killed by the shinigami fov being boring, I would be hard tempted by the Shinigami eyes. They get visual acuity of 3.6, or 72/20 vision, regardless of OG eyesight. 

Whether that is worth half of my lifespan is a hard question to answer, but the temptation would be real.

But like, Lights a killer who has his list, goes through it, and moves on. 

In contrast, Misa is more personally motivated, and Mikimai is more detail obsessed.They can just check the TV for pictures. Because Kira being able to kill through photograph sounds batshit to the average Joe, and people still need to know what the school shooters and ect look like, and maybe its easier if they are dead. And then enough of the public was on Kira's side that it never really died out. 

E:-True bur this is Japan. Who has no issues hiding child killers. And still maintains hiding killers faces even post trial. Or the issues with the European system as well doing the same.

K:-Canon Light goes for the surface crime.

E:-LMAO! He just skims Justice.

K:-He kills people who have commited crime and have their name and face available. He doesn't dig. Like, he digs enough to hack, but hes relying on the public a lot more then he would ever consciously admit. 

E:-If he needs details he has Mikami. 

K:-Thats not until part 2.

E:-True true.Ugh God imagine he used the power of 2chan. Japanese 4chan

K:-Like I mean, maybe by part 2 he has gotten better at looking past surface crime and for underlying issues, but If anything, I think the prominence of the cult and stuff means he might have gotten lazier.

E:-Light learning management

K:-I mean, Mello is out there running the mafia (in a vacancy that may be kira related), but that the Mafia still exists after years of Kira indicates that Kira is not as effective as he hopes it to be.Thd Mafia still being around and capable of abducting his sister, indicates that overall crime is not receding as he thought it might. 

E:-Oh no its full on rampant. He is dealing with surface crime. Not the actual big guys. 

Or corrupt politicians outside of Japan like the Philippines or Latin America or South East Asia. 

K:-Yah. The thing about both Light and L as figures of justice, is that they are holding up the current system they live in, not challenging or exposing it. 

E:-While I can't blame them for not digging in more it does add to the fact its not as deep as it could've done as it centers around justice and ego of man. 

K:-They are Justice, so they uphold the justice system as they see it. Light plays it by the socially conventional rules, where L goes off the socially (and often ethically) acceptable path to get the end result, which will be criminal caught. L cares about the journey, where Light cares about the destination.l, it's the same place, but different roads. They don't care why crime happens, just that they stop it. I guess I would say Justice is a core theme, but not the point in the story. 

In contrast, PDN is about Persona 5 and Death Note, so will explore Justice in a lot more detail.

E:-That crossover is gonna take so much brain cells.

K:- I know

E:-I am a monkey with a keyboard ,K

K:-Hey, Imagine if Death note had Nickajack

"Mello is running the Mafia from America". 

"Actually Sir it's worse. He's running the Mafia in Nickajack"

E:-I mean shit yeah that can happen they never had 9/11

Lmao lets make it real. Gotta commit to the DN crazy ass world logic. I snorted my coffee out with that Mello bit. I hope you're proud of yourself. 

K:- I am

[destinygoldenstar]

I think it’s important of a reminder that I personally think it’s fair to critique for what a media DID do, not what they didn’t do. Because what you expect could not be the writers goals at all, and you only end up disappointed when it doesn’t do exactly what you expect.

Cause if I had a nickel for every January release of a third act of a franchise season I’m into that I’ve been disappointed by when the rest is otherwise really good…

Blah blah two nickels.

I already talked about the Total Drama Reboot ending. In all honesty I think the reception is understandably more split than anything else. Either you love the third act or you don’t. I just happened to fall in the latter category. I loved the first 8 episodes though. It’s more of a ‘This was great until it wasn’t’ situation.

And what do you know, there’s another show that also had a January third act that had me sum up that season.

Hirogaru Sky Pretty Cure.

This season was GREAT. Until it wasn’t.

I think that’s the perfect phrase for this season.

Now for context, though I don’t talk about it much in my posts, I follow all kinds of magical girl tags.

Magical Girls are my special interest. I’ve written more magical girl stories than I’ve published online. My OC, GoldenStar, can be classified as an OC if you wanted. Magical Girl shows just press my autistic buttons so much and I can never get enough of them. (Except Magical Girl Site, that show can burn in my memory and never come back in my head)

You don’t know what the genre is, it’s a sub-superhero genre that’s (most of the time) female centric, that involves (usually) a team of girls finding powers, having beautifully animated transformations into superhero personas with big hair not suited for combat, and they, with the power of love and friendship, kick ass and save the day.

Think Winx and Lolirock if you’re western.

So naturally, I couldn’t get enough of Pretty Cure back in the day. As it was basically the perfect ‘magical girl obsessor campsite’. As every season of the show has the benefit of having a brand new cast of characters each time, and therefore different lore that keeps things fresh.

I guess best way to explain it to western users is ‘Power Rangers but magical girls, and animated’

Which is an ironic way to explain it cause Power Rangers is actually an American Adaptation of a franchise called Super Sentai… made by the same company that made Pretty Cure.

I kinda had a falling out with the franchise though. That’s because, and let’s be real here, the newer seasons are kinda lousy.

Now, hold on, it’s not all bad these past five years. I loved Healin Good and WILL defend it. Tropical Rouge was decently fun and had some great episodes. But compare the seasons these past five years to some of the older ones like Heartcatch and… yeah, there’s a noticeable writing dip.

Especially when you get into Delicious Party…

That was the first time I ever downright hated a Pretty Cure season and got angry at multiple points. And if I wasn’t angry, I Aw as bored to tears. Not a good combination. Just so so SO much wrong with this season from beginning to end. (And saying that opinion got me blocked from Fandom.)

But then Hirogaru Sky was next, and yes, wow, it started out PHENOMENAL. I was blown away again and completely invested again. This season seemed like it was doing all kinds of shake ups to the franchise and taking the entire structure in new directions. While also paying homage to the first season with the duo team structure. I loved its main characters and their dynamics throughout the show. The designs are gorgeous. The first half is thrilling and intense and some of the best of the franchise since Hugtto. Back then, I was about ready to call this an S tier season and in my top 5…

This is why you wait till a season is done before you go say stuff like that. I learned that now.

Now, I’m not actually going to dunk on the ending this time. Because bottom line is: It’s one very stupid plot twist after another to the point where it’s like they can’t make up their mind what they want, none of the build up throughout the show amounted to anything, and the final battle is horrifically paced and completely botches the character arcs of certain people. Sora in particular.

Not THAT Sora. That Sora had an amazing payoff. I’m talking about Pretty Cure Sora, not Ninjago Sora. Dragons Rising was really good and actually stuck the landing.

But I do think we’re hating on this season for all the wrong reasons. I know we all made predictions about where the story was headed, and almost all those theories became wrong.

Like, I know we all predicted, myself included, that Shalala was the twist main villain. This turned out to be wrong. But they didn’t have to do that if they didn’t want it.

It’s the same thing with Total Drama. We all predicted Damien was a finalist and that turned out wrong. But I chose not the criticize that show for not making him a finalist because, well, the writers didn’t want him to be a finalist. That’s okay. Instead I criticized how they handled the role in the story they gave him. You know, what they intended.

Just because your theories were wrong, does NOT make it the end of the world. You can definitely claim that your theory would have been the better story route than what we got. BUT fact of the matter is, you’re not the writer. You don’t get to decide what the writers want to do with their story. And saying you do cause you’re a fan is just entitlement. (Go make a fanfiction if you’re gonna be that petty about it)

I keep saying, don’t criticize what the writers didn’t do, criticize what the writers DID do. Try and see what the writers were going for. Not what you wanted.

We all expected going in that Hirogaru Sky would be this epic hero-ideology season. This big philosophy on what it means to be a hero and the ups and downs that came with it. Kind of like a Kamen Rider Kuuga type of story. There was all kind of foreshadowing that Sora was going to endure quite a bit of an arc upon realizing her hero idealism was kinda trash.

We got that about the first half, then nothing. What we got instead was NOT a morally grey complex narrative. We got a simple black and white world where Sora’s hero idealism turned out to be pretty much perfect from the start, and the villain is literally just as ‘evil for the sake of evil’ as you can get. It became ‘I don’t know if I scan grow up to be a hero’ instead of ‘being a hero kinda sucks’.

So when that wasn’t the theme we got, and it wasn’t this morally complex story that we all hoped for… yeah I can see people getting angry.

But that’s not the problem for me. Because they wanted a black and white story. So they did a black and white story. So we gotta judge it by what they were going for.

Now yes, Shalala being the villain instead of who we got would’ve been preferable, if only cause the villain we got is just awful as a character and fails as a villain in almost every front. The hero role being muddied out would’ve been juicy in angst. But it’s not what the writers wanted to do.

So instead of criticizing what it’s not. I’m choosing to criticize it for what it is. That the villain was horrifically built up and a terrible character, and the final battle is horrific pacing that leaves no satisfying conclusion for Sora because of bad pacing. She gets slapped with dark energy juice and all it takes to snap her out of it is Deus Ex Machina from her BFF? Seriously? You couldn’t think of a better way to resolve that?

Just because it didn’t say stuff about being a hero that you want them to say, doesn’t mean they said anything at all. And if you want to rewrite this season to say the stuff you thought it should have, then go ahead. No one’s stopping you.

Basically, I think the third act distaste for Hirogaru Sky is justified, but people are pointing out the wrong reasons why it’s distasteful.

I said it once, Ill say it again:

You HAVE to have a solid third act. Because that’s what people will walk away from. If you try something fancy and screw up, people are gonna remember the botched ending rather than the whole story. Even if the rest of your story is fantastic.