#there are still more actually but idk if anyone's interested
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stellamancer · 1 day ago
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👁️👁️ …. sweet niku i am abt to go eep but . u have opened pandora’s box and so i must ask :3333c for nikumichi crumbs ….. uraniku …… you are v creative with shipnames so it’s hard to guess PVDKDBD but i desire to know >:3 how do you think you would meet / what would the dynamic be like ….. ? who’d catch feelings first ? ?? i must know . this is extremely important pls tell me everything!!!!! 🎤
🐭🐭🐭🍵 (<- the mice bringing u tea while you think this over …….)
LMAOOOO i'm not super creative!! they get adapted from by others... like nikooj (or enlightenmeat which was still a friend's idea and not mine). so the uramichi x niku name (as adapted by others is) uraniku/uranikoo but if i wanted to go in the same vein as enlightenmeat... UNFORTUNATELY THE FIRST THOUGHT IS ACTUALLY 'ROADKILL' OF ALL THINGS. T_T let me workshop it a little longer.
i think that i've never really actually super thought of it it because i think i was thinking of doing an ocship (with my baby girl princess kira no less) more than selfshipping. the lore there is actually really hilarious imo. mostly because kira's brothers are the type of hilarious people that uramichi would hate dealing with.
this is actually super hard because like. it's extremely hard to think of HOW we'd meet. i don't wanna do overlap so i don't want it to be like how i meet gojo or deku in their respective selfships. and I DON'T WANNA DO NEIGHBORS SINCE U KNOW I HAD A NEIGHBOR AU FIC I WANTED TO WRITE.
anyway, after some brainstorming on discord with some pals, uramichi and i would be introduced to each other by some friends we have in common, or rather, i have plucked my beloved moda and their beloved momo (from idolish7 which has now be canonized in uramichi world lmao) and they decide to set us up. kind of. maybe. they both invite us to go to yakiniku on a covert double date (actually moda has invited me to go with them and momo before but i have refused on account of not wanting to be a third wheel).
both uramichi and i separately clock that we're essentially being set up on a blind date immediately when both moda and momo suggest it to us but both decide to still go for our own reasons (me because moda tells me that momo has offered to pay for everyone and uramichi 1) to prove to usahara he does indeed have friends and 2) he's ultimately incapable of telling anyone who isn't usahara no).
i think that first double date is kind of... awkward. i'm honestly not particularly outgoing and neither is he and momo and moda do a lot of heavy lifting at the beginning...... i think the conversation 'takes off' (as much as it can take off for two socially awkward introverts) once we get into talking about hobbies. and moda and momo kind of watch us in amusement lmao.
it would probably be a very slow start, with a lot of nudging from momo and moda who thought things went very well. we probably run into one another randomly at some point and have go out to eat or hang out or something. maybe drinking. well. he drinks and while i don't really drink, maybe i have one or two since i'm a social drinker LMAO. i think the dynamic is kind of sickly sweet and wholesome ahahaha. uramichi doesn't really activate the tsun in me, but i think once we become closer he teases me a little as a treat. LMAO.
i think i'm generally fairly good at navigating personal landmines so i don't think i'd step on one of his but the lore need some drama so i probably do at some point...
IDK WHO CATCHES FEELINGS FIRST. i think we probably have an idiots in love sort of thing in which we don't think the other is interested (usahara and kumatani are trying to convince uramichi otherwise but failing). it might be a case of he catches them first but i realize first. he's probably pretty deep in denial. some jealousy aspect needs to get involved tho. idk how yet, i need to cook on that more, but i need jealous uramichi. i think he'd be like an angry sulky cat. no i need him to get so jealous he drags me away all dramatic ASK ME THIS AGAIN LATER I NEED TO REALLY COOK ON IT.
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takitori67 · 1 year ago
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A bunch of Amasali
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Maybe i will dig out some old arts. Maybe not
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bitchthefuck1 · 6 months ago
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That one chef saying that the worst thing about a bad boss is how they unlock that behavior in you and seeing Carmy mirror the attitude of the chef that terrorized him and gave him panic attacks and then ending the season with Syd having a panic attack because of the stress of working with Carmy...diabolical.
#idk if it's a little too on the nose or not (i literally just finished the season so i haven't had time to sit with it) but that whole#element is so interesting (and so devastating). and the ways that mirrors all of Nat's worries about continuing the dysfunction of her#family now that she has a kid...#i also think its a good portrayal of how not addressing your trauma and leaving things to fester can end up hurting other people way more#than it hurts you. like even if Carmy is okay with choosing to not have a life or to be close with anyone (which. debatable) he's#not the only one whose life gets fucked by that. the mess just radiates out until it hits everyone around him and he ends up creating#the same circumstances that caused his dysfunction in the first place.#even if evil joel mchale chef is right (a+ casting btw very punchable face) and carmy needs to ruin his life to be a good chef#--which is a big if--he's actively making the people around him less able to do their jobs. which then makes the people around them#less able. and so on. so in the end it's still net negative. and like. chef terry proves that he's actually completely wrong#the environment in her kitchen is the exact opposite and everyone is operating at an insane level anyway no abuse necessary#this season was definitely the weakest of the 3 but i rly wanna see where they go next. and they better drop the next bit soon bc that was#in no way complete#the bear#the bear season 3#carmy berzatto#sydney adamu#the bear spoilers
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silusvesuius · 4 months ago
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n*loth not being able to bag anyone over the (human term) age of 25-30 at most is the only logical and real conclusion to me because it can be just explained away as him wanting to prove and control everything and anyone (Cus he's a man!) but being stuck in that demographic because his unbearable and vile personality is a force that nobody can look past once they've outgrown the possible fear and idolization period of anyone but also n*loth in particular.
#text#i think even younger ones that possess the same nasty traits can be slammed back 'In their place' (in his mind) by him just bc his -#- abilities and power alone (alt. name the factors that make him 'Cool') that dumbs them down insanely in comparison#maybe by this i mean like; ild*ri. despite the animosity she could still feel very foolish and is conscious of her wuss-ness#if that makes sense#cause no matter the disrespect anyone might have for an older capable person the reality is still reality#tbh i just think he doesn't like to sweat it much and still aims for the younger ones bc it's easier than it would be for someone that's -#- 30+ years old#and once he's proven his point he doesn't find any merit in sticking with older ones cause their interests or anything they offer -#- don't matter to or interest Him personally#i think an older demographic is just more boring to him and he would rather spend his time being metaphorically sucked off for his greats -#- by someone that already finds themselves 'lesser' than him and always will for a long time#than someone that is defiant of that fact#basically the more power imbalance the better#in his mind there will always be one unless he certainly knows someone is his equal (or better than him) but he likes the add-on of an -#- age difference too#keeps it in a safe zone with less problems for him#sorry for spitting again my brain just started machine-gunning thoughts for no reason#also i said before that he's an innocence fan. might not be a total puritan but there's something there#it's kinda like him not wanting to be with a dusty ''OLD'' person that's seen a lot anyway#i'm like barely able to hold myself back from opening my mouth to mention t*lvas where i'm making a point about n*loth's brain where he -#- isn't even needed to prove it#but like#him voicing dislike of n*loth general nauseating character and actions but still sucking up to him while n*loth can probably feel -#- that dislike anyway is cute to me i like to view it as an object being thrown into the wall over and over#where n*loth is proving his own worth to other people by drilling their brains out with proof. not that he needs to#but he would like that to be perfected a 100%#and t*lvas is capable of being molded into that state ....... probably#silusvesuisuis you didnot just confess to wanting to see t*lvas be slammed into a wall you fucked up demented beast you're sick#actually can't believe i forgot to mention this but he's literally so immature idk what he has anything in common with actual mature people
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batsplat · 6 months ago
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do you have a favorite bit of motogp gossip that you either want to know is it’s true, or you just enjoy as a stand alone piece, no need for further investigation?
one of those where I initially stared at and like. lost all motogp knowledge in my brain. and then stuff did come back to me. this is all very much low hanging fruit and I'll add to it when I remember more interesting/quirky ones. BUT here are some things I want to know:
y'know how casey randomly suggests in his autobiography that valentino was sabotaged in the 2006 title decider? so, personally, I don't really buy this, because 'why' and also 'casey girl you are SO paranoid' - though, sure, if given the option I'd like to double check if valentino had a dud tyre (completely plausible) and also if somebody really deliberately gave him one (?? casey idk about this one). but what I'm REALLY curious about is... there's a change in his autobiography?? like I've seen this book excerpt float around online and the text is different from what's in my book!! mine's from the paperback version so I assume there may have been some edits for that, so that would make it the newer version... but like. this is a real editorial change. check this out:
version posted on the internet, from the hard cover edition???
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version in my book, first paragraph is the same
But as soon as the lights went out Valentino was in trouble. I was one of six riders to pass him on the first lap and if you watch the footage you can see how much he is struggling to even keep up with us. His rear and front tyres were just not working together and on lap five the front inexplicably folded and he went down, right behind me. I couldn't help but wonder how he could be having such problems with his tyres. Could he really have been stitched up? It seemed so improbable, but I remember watching that race back in the motorhome that evening and thinking, Welcome to my world, mate.
this isn't 'gossip' because I haven't found anyone else who has spotted this, but like? that's a substantive change? if my one really is the newer one? ...?
let's set aside the fascinating insight you get into casey's knotty and at times bizarre valentino rossi complex with him adding the line "welcome to my world, mate" (oh my god. please just take him to dinner. I will crowd fund this I literally just need to be able to listen in. casey come on CALL him I NEED you to do the dinner thing, YOU suggested it not me). like we're not going to even touch that. but if my version really is the updated one, then he's kinda softened his stance, no?? "convinced he was stitched up" to "could he really have been stitched up"
what happened?? who wanted this change? casey? an editor? did dorna give casey a call? did some poor bloke from pr have to politely ask whether casey could please not state in his autobiography that the most popular rider ever had had a title stolen from him by the establishment?
(casey was talking about valentino's stolen tenth BEFORE it was popular. he did it even before valentino did, bless)
"there are a lot of commercial interests in the sport" also didn't make the jump to the 'new version', mind you. did Big America get to casey
come on you guys have to admit this is an odd change?? does nobody else thing this is weird??
okay fine moving on
Did Valentino Literally Curse Sete
(like. not literally as in did he curse curse sete, literally as in did he say it)
(though if he did literally literally curse curse sete, I suppose I'd also like to know that bit)
the commentators in 2003 brno say so and I'm inclined to believe them, but I need to double check whether sete and valentino really were partying on ibiza together right after that very painful valentino loss at the sachsenring. such a fascinating little detail, that's not something post-2004 valentino does I reckon
I mean, look, obviously a bunch of things from that time period I want to have fact checked. including valentino's friend hearing sete say in late 2003 that valentino wasn't going to be smiling so much after joining yamaha. classic bit of gossip, did it actually happen though
I've referenced this a few times before, but y'know how valentino said that marc's manager alzamora told him after sepang 2015 that marc had been angry at valentino for killing his title charge? I just want. to know. if this conversation actually happened. I don't think valentino would pluck a lie like that out of thin air, especially something so specific about somebody on marc's team, and he has known alzamora for decades but like. maybe almazora just said something valentino misinterpreted? I just find this such a bonkers thing from alzamora if it's true that I would like it confirmed for my own sanity, you know?
yeah look I would like to know if marc really did get casey kicked out of honda, obviously I've discussed this before and it's very he said she said but yeah it'd be fun to know the truth
this is literally peak gossip because I can't find a source for it but I swear a journalist did say it: the rumour is that marc blocked joan mir from joining honda in 2019. like, I'm only including this because I was explicitly asked for gossip as I just cannot find where it was said... but it is something that is. out there. and... again, just curious. like I buy it, but also it could be bullshit!
on a similar note, did he ever make clear to honda he didn't want either vinales or rinsy on his team circa 2016? was it just a vibe in the paddock or was this an actual demand from marc?
speaking of!! the whole thing about alzamora basically rigging the moto3 teammate situation between rinsy and alex marquez to ensure the latter won the title that year. what was that all about, how far did they go there
switching to valentino now. this doesn't quite fit the remit of the question because it IS something I've investigated. and my conclusion is basically a big *shrug*
did valentino block casey from joining yamaha in either 2005 or 2006, and did he attempt to block jorge?
there are completely contradictory sources on the timeline here that do make me feel like there's a chance yamaha was just fucking with casey at the very least in 2006 and valentino had fuck all to do with it, which a recent interview from casey did actually hint at too... he made it sound like maybe yamaha was just using him to try to drive down the price of another rider (which would then presumably be jorge)
I just want to know! and the thing is, it was a matter of open paddock discussion that valentino blocked casey (jorge explicitly references it in in 2007), but something doesn't quite add up between what jorge, casey, colin edwards, articles from the time and lin jarvis have said on the subject! my current pet theory is that valentino blocked casey in 2005 from joining the satellite yamaha team in 2006 (weirdly casey doesn't really imply valentino was responsible for this one in his autobiography, but whatever) but NOT in 2006 (casey does imply valentino was responsible here, you see my problem). and yamaha was fucking around with all four of valentino, casey, jorge and edwards in late 2006/2007. but. yeah. I have unanswered questions
the entire 'alex marquez blocked from yamaha' situation.... again. something is off there. you know the story from late last year about how he was blocked in 2019 from joining the petronas team in 2021? this completely threw me, because there was an entirely different story about this YEARS back in 2018!! I initially assumed the two stories were about the same event, but it can't have been! one's him being blocked in 2019 for 2021, one's him being blocked in 2018 for 2019
from the descriptions of both there's also no confusing them. the 2018 story has to be about the 2018 contract cycle because that's quite literally when it was published, and the 2023 story has to be about the 2019 contract cycle because it explicitly references the space fabio would create by moving to the factory team for 2021, which obviously wouldn't make sense before fabio's actual rookie season. like they have to be about different stories
and in that same 2018 story, marc said that back in 2016 lin jarvis told him no marquez would be joining yamaha:
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again, this was in 2018!!
plus, he did say back in 2016 that he'd spoken to jarvis, which kinda backs up this is a conversation that did happen and marc isn't just misremembering the timeline/lying (the notion of marc joining yamaha in 2017 is fantastic, what an absolutely horrendous idea):
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now what marc says in 2018 about his conversation with lin jarvis is very similar to petronas yamaha boss razali saying in 2023 that he'd been told by yamaha no marquez was allowed at yamaha. suggests that this is a thing that did happen!!
but again... razali was told that in 2019... after marc had already been told the same thing three years before that, and the exact same deal had already been blocked one year earlier... does nobody else think this is weird?? like, I'm not saying yamaha hq covered themselves in glory here, but is it not a little strange the satellite yamaha squad had basically almost signed a contract with the younger marquez again without checking in with yamaha, just ONE YEAR after this same contract had already been blocked???
again this isn't actually gossip because I'm apparently the only person going ?? about this but I'll say it: ??
kinda been annoying me since december last year, like I know it doesn't matter but I'm just curious about it! why's nobody else talking about the 2018 story!
idk my best guess here is that petronas yamaha was faffing about and playing weird games with the factory team, that the deal was never as likely to happen as they made it sound to the marquez camp. zero proof, that's me spreading rumours yeah... time to create some of my own unfounded gossip
(also of course I'm curious if valentino did have any actual involvement in this. like if lin jarvis was telling marc this in the year of our lord 2016, I'm assuming valentino didn't have to explicitly say to jarvis that 'inviting marc to the team for 2017' wasn't exactly high on his christmas wish list. it is interesting that marc frames it as jarvis making this about. like. all the marquez's way back in 2016, and again, would this really have been on valentino's radar at the time? that feels a bit...? alex marquez was thirteenth in that moto2 season? would certainly be very... thorough for valentino to already have had that particular talk with jarvis)
(mind u there's a fun moment in a 2019 presser where valentino is sitting between the two marquez brothers and the younger marquez is being asked about his contract situation, the implication being he'd had a motogp deal and no longer had a motogp deal. and he's answering and marc's doing his freak stare and valentino is Right There sitting between them... I <3 mess)
man did valentino actually ever fucking block anyone from joining his manufacturer #notmygoat. I still think he didn't know about jorge until the deal was basically done, had nothing to do with the younger marquez, at most blocked casey the one time but then yamaha wasn't actually seriously intending on signing casey in 2006 and was just using it as a play in their jorge negotiations, which.... idk. bit disappointing if true icl. I hope he blocked someone, I'll say it
(also. okay. I don't want to sound awful here because I do have a lot of sympathy for baby!casey but. ignoring the morality for a second, I do LOVE the idea that valentino blocked casey from getting a satellite yamaha seat fresh off his 250cc runner up season because it would conclusively prove valentino did ABSOLUTELY rate casey!! like he didn't even want casey to come close to being his teammate!! not even a sniff at his data!!) (genuinely this is the rumour I'm choosing to believe, I know there's a chance valentino didn't successfully block anyone and was just a complete flop but I want the 2005 one to be true. it really adds something to the rivalry idk... like ugh valentino saw how dangerous casey was proper early when much of the paddock wasn't yet convinced... cute)
moving on
there was a rumour in 2015 that valentino approached dani after aragon to complain about how sturdy his defence was, like moaning about denying him points and shit. now, there's exactly one article about this in marca that is the sole origin point for the rumour, and it says that valentino also interrupted a honda party after phillip island to complain to marc. this does not match up at all with anything either marc or valentino have said since then - and would mean you have to believe that marc wasn't actually blindsided by that presser... also feels a bit unlikely we would have heard NOTHING from any other source if vale was really gatecrashing a honda party
of course, neither dani nor valentino have spoken about this supposed post-aragon 2015 meeting either, not even when dani was kinda accusing valentino of hypocrisy during sepang 2015, but I suppose you could say maybe dani's just not the type of guy to bring it up again. however.... I do reckon occam's razor kinda applies here and if one of these stories is bullshit then they probably both are, plus it's not like marca is exactly a neutral source. still would love to be certain!! instinctively I don't really think that's valentino's style at all, but of course it'd be intriguing if the story were true because it'd be a sign of how 2015 kinda messed with him. but I still feel 2015 is more about him falling back on past tools he'd mostly discarded - rather than, like, acting wildly out of character, which again... well, this brings us back to how that kind of behaviour isn't really valentino's style. basically, I don't buy it, but that's kinda why I am so curious about it? because I feel like it would be really interesting and quirky if he had actually done that. does this make any sense
speaking of, again this doesn't really count because I did kinda investigate it last year.... but you know when valentino in that podcast referenced a conversation with marc around the time of sepang 2015, where marc stared blankly at him? I have a hunch about when that conversation happened, want to know if it's right. this also isn't really 'gossip' because this is a conversation I'm having with myself but
y'know when bez was injured on the ranch late-ish last year? a bunch of journalists pointed out how hush hush they were about what actually happened to bez - like they repeatedly drew attention to that because god knows THEY love some gossip lol. which probably means nothing, but I'm curious what the journalists' theory here is, like do they think it was an embarrassing injury?? OR. look. I suppose the conspiracy theory would be that pecco caused it (obviously accidentally!!) and everyone at the ranch knew it'd be a terrible look if they admitted that because of the whole title fight situation. call me casey stoner because those dots are not real and definitely have not been connected
okay, you know how there were rumours in the spanish tabloids bez said some real ugly stuff to marc at valencia last year, and bez didn't directly address it but freaked a little and did a sort of blanket denial that he'd said anything that bad? I don't actually think he did tbh, but again. would just like to check!
while we're already on bez, there was one report that the switch to aprilia was partly motivated by marc to factory ducati. again, not entirely sure I buy that this would factor into his thinking beyond the obvious 'this means the route to that factory ducati seat looks even more closed than it already did' angle'.... it's very much down my list of priorities but I'd quickly confirm/deny it if given the chance yeah
that's all for now lol
#these all feel INCREDIBLY boring but i'm stuck 2/3 of the way through a bunch of different asks and this was fast and fun so#anon i will return to this when i think of more interesting ones. my brain gave up on me. these are all so basic bleh#man i'm gonna miss lin i swear he was always up to some shit#i see u buddy. i know u were flat out lying to colin edwards for like. half a year. i see u#//#brr brr#batsplat responds#“welcome to my world mate” caseyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy#every day i wake up and think about Her (all the things casey wants to tell valentino but has never gotten the chance to)#like he canonically factually actually wants valentino to know what casey's pov on that rivalry was... doesn't that make you CRAZY#he doesn't want to interrogate valentino he wants to confess to him... he wants valentino to Understand... makes me ill#u know it's also like... because valentino literally has said Nothing substantive about that rivalry since mid 2013#has casey like... noticed? I'm sure he doesn't WANT valentino to keep insulting him but idk it's kind of a bit. hm#like if you ARE looking for closure and YOU are still talking about it a lot but the other guy is just. Not. would that bother you?#idk!! maybe it really is completely a confessional impulse for him. casey constantly wanting to get his story out there#and not really caring what valentino contributes. that he's stopped contributing at all. orrrrr WOULD he like valentino to *respond*#does he want confirmation valentino is even seeing this stuff!! sending it out into the ether and waiting for the echo gahhhhh#what was this post about again#THE FUNDAMENTAL ALIENATION OF FEELING UNSEEN BY YOUR FOIL WHO SHOULD UNDERSTAND YOU BETTER THAN ANYONE ELSE#alien tag
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icewindandboringhorror · 3 months ago
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I occasionally wish to reach out to old friends/acquaintances I haven't spoken to since high school/some other even earlier time in my life, but I have SOOO little social energy even for required tasks (like making dr phone calls or etc), I never have any leftover for extra ones, and it would be very odd to message someone I haven't spoken to in like 5 years out of the blue but then take 4 entire months to respond back lol.. My natural curiosity with nostalgia/collecting details of the past/etc. (literally if I were born a little earlier I would definitely do scrapbooking or something lol) is very strong, but, alas, not strong enough to beat out the Social Issues Demons apparently
#facebook always does that 'here's a post from this day 8 years ago' thing. and I see old comments interacting#with people and it's so like.. OOOOO~~ where are they now?? what's going on? how much have they changed as people?#how much are they the same? this is fascinating. i should contact them!!' but then it's like... take that to it's logical conclusion though#you would contact them and then IF they even responded it would take you 80 years to respond and then they would#think there was something wrong or that you were trying to be insulting or something. To contact anyone I need to include an 85 page#disclaimer of all of my social issues & mental illness things. 'If i take 3 weeks to reply I promise it has nothing to do with u' etc lol#THIS is why more people need to be into phone calls/voice calls/some form of audio real time communication/etc.#I think one of the main things that's hard about messaging through text for me is it's so unscheduled and open ended#(plus it takes forever if you're talking about anything in detail and gets very long very quickly)#because like you can send a message and then just get a reply whenever. and then you're expected to reply back whenever#so it's like you never know when the response will come or when a new obligation to reply can come up? so it's like this sudden thing with#no outline?? if that makes sense. whereas a phone call is very like 'hello let's schedule a call from 10am - 2pm on thursday'. And you know#EXACTLY when the interaction will start and EXACTLY when it will end and you can plan around it in your schedule easily.#I have the reverse thing of a lot of people (how people don't pick up phone calls/hate calls/only text)#I would literally talk on the phone with a stranger. I would have a discord voice chat with someone I barely know.#if someone I hardly even remember from elementary school asked to have a voice call with me out of nowhere I would do it.#but if a stranger MESSAGED me?? or someone I barely know sent me a TEXT or something?? I will never reply probably#It's just too vague and weird. and you can't read voice tone over text. and the interaction could last forever with no clear end#point and etc. etc. But a call is like. set. established. clear boundaries. you can read the flow of conversation better. rapport. etc. etc#I get that I guess people feel more anonymous or distanced over text?? but you can have fake phone numbers on the computer. or do like disc#rd calls. or zoom without a camera or etc. etc. Also the distance that's present in text is BAD distance because it just means that tone is#not conveyed properly and you will never truly get a sense of the person's conversational vibe or mannerisms or how well you really click.#ANYWAY ghgjh...... I'm so so so interested in concepts of like.. How did that one kid I used to talk to in elementary school#but then they moved away in 5th grade - how did they end up? what are they doing now?? etc. etc. Like despite the severe social anhedonia#and general lack of connection with others I'm just really fascinated in like.. idk. the human development of it all and like#the concept of how we're actually a million different people through the course of our lives ever evolving in different iterations and etc.#PLUS again. i love nostalgia. sometimes old peple you know might remember a shared memory or can tell you about something you forgot#or etc. like it's SUCH A COOL THING in CONCEPT but I am too socially inept generally speaking lol. which people I still talk to today are#familiar with my 'phone call once every few months' communication style. but strangers would just be like... wtf. And I don't blame them#Sure I literally cannot change the physical health + brain issues i have - but also I know enough to not put others through that lol
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storywestistrash · 3 months ago
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i am actually so tired of the way westerners treat eastern europeans
#fair warning for. a very very long ramble and rant in the tags. apologies#westerner or russian. no other option#westerner because the only thought they ever have is 'but they had universal housing so if you oppose ussr you oppose that'#(which is stupid becuse you can believe in that WITHOUT WANTING LIKE 6 COUNTRIES TO BE FORCED TO BE RULED OVER BY RUSSIA)#(SORRY FOR WANTING TO LIVE IN MY COUNTRY WITH MY HISTORY AND MY CULTURE AND NOT RUSSIA!!) (poland was a sattelite state but GOD)#or russian because they have a victim complex and are convinced that they deserve to rule over the entire damn world#'well you had universal housing so you had it easy' right yeah. okay. forget about like. everything else that happened#to eastern europeans during that time#forget about the things that are STILL issues all these years later not only in poland but like the more eastern countries too#its not about. the fact that the houses 'didnt have 3 bedrooms and a jacuzzi' in them. you DUMB SACK OF SHIT#god sorry. sorry. i also know so very little but like god damn i fucking live here. i didnt sit thru all that modern history#for some dumbfuck to say that 'ohhh only rich and american middle class people are happy the ussr was dissolved'#'oooh the dissolving of the ussr was illegal and the countries within it actually liked being there'#im just so fucking tired man i need to. i need to start killing people#and this is all not to mention that theyll say this stupid shit and then deny eastern europeans the things they actually did that were good#FUCK french people for trying to claim maria skłodowska. fuck americans for trying to claim the witcher as their own fantasy world#fuck the way the west is allowed to claim and destroy eastern european culture without any consequence because we dont matter enough#vaguely related but ill throw this in here since anyone finding it is unlikely and im scared of having this opinion#i think one underappreciated aspect of DE (which might be underappreciated because its not actually there and im stupid)#is that its pro-communist while still also giving some criticism to how it was handled and acknowledging that its still not perfect#which makes the writers much better communists than any self-proclaimed one ive ever met in my life who just worships the idea#perhaps its because the writers of the game were not white upper middle-class americans living in the suburbs. among other things#idk de is a game for people far smarter than me and i only played it once and im sure anyone who played it well can clock me as a bad perso#horrible horrible person even which is why im scared of mentioning it. but its an interesting thing. to me#the main thing is that im just not. im not far left enough i suppose. i agree communism in theory is a great idea. as far as i know it#(which isnt very far)#but chances of implementing it correctly in a way that doesnt take away from peoples happiness in other areas is. low. very low#i wrote a short essay about how utopias are inherently contradictory ideas once it wasnt very deep or good but like#you cant have universal happiness without restricting certain freedoms. and when those freedoms are resticted not everyone#will be happy. and then theyre unhappy they will have to be somehow removed or ignored
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pekoeboo · 4 months ago
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ugh. some thoughts.
really been trying to find the joy in drawing/writing again and honestly it's been such a challenge. friends have told me it's most likely depression that's making it hard to feel motivated and tbh they're probably right.
hoping to get back into being creative in the way I Want to be at some point tho. I miss it. there's still so much with my stories and characters that I haven't been able to share or explain and I wish I knew how without it feeling like this daunting, impossible task.
I don't know when I'll get around to actually sharing art again (or writing, if ever). was hoping that I'd manage to get some of my mental and physical issues in check recently for just long enough to get back into the swing of being creative, but that hasn't seemed to work. everything feels bad, both artistically and physically. I'm struggling to keep up with the frantic pace at which my brain comes up with story concepts and intriguing character interactions, even tho everything in me wishes I could turn it into tangible artistic expression so I can get it out of my head and share it. it used to be easy. I don't know why it's not now.
I'm just . tired, I guess.
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tetedurfarm · 4 months ago
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now that the seasons are starting to turn again i'm looking at the rabbits and planning out my fall/winter litters....i don't get many litters in winter in general though i do try every month to keep some of them from getting fat. i'm thinking of making more fun meat litters since i put SO much focus on show litters over summer
it's funny, because i spent so much time and feed on show animals and i feel like i got like...nothing out of that. i know part of it is because i lost a few litters to my negligence on vaccinating, but man i forget just how unforgiving showing is. you might get one kit per litter that's worth keeping - and that's if you aren't working with marked breeds, which i am. i do look at my hotots and feel like i am making some decent progress, though only one single keeper is actually a purebred :/ the himis are still spinning in a net zero, after admitting that i needed to cull like all my bucks and start over, and also losing all of my original does this year as well to various age-related ailments. i have one more litter of sausages under mom right now and we'll see how they turn out
i have bred basically zero rex - i think i did a couple early in the year but niña's litter are the first ones i've had since spring which is wild to me. spencer SHOULD be pregnant now too which will be fun! i have gotten a frankly pitiful amount of satins born, to the point where after this latest attempt i am probably giving up on standard satin and trying out minis :/ i think i can get away with avoiding peanuts without them getting too big, and i can work with a variety i love but is underdeveloped. i just want something typey to beef up my skills at the little nuances....please....
this winter/next spring i also think i will be needing to think about breeding basil's replacement....she did a good job with her last litter but she had some trouble regaining her condition afterwards. i don't think she's done yet, but i need to think about it. i already know that my keeper will be by orpheus because combining my two most amazing meat lines Ever will only create the ultimate rabbit to end all rabbits. but i just gotta sit and wait for the Perfect doe to appear
anyway thank you for coming to my ted talk about rabbit planning that was actually just me talking at the void. i think overall i had a good year but i don't feel like i made tons of progress on my showing goals. oh well. always the rest of the year and next year :)
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infizero · 8 months ago
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hehehehehehehe
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queenarsinoethepoisoner · 9 months ago
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Ok I got a lot more of a reaction than I thought I would for my shiny duo fic idea, and a kinda major part of it is that it’s in a diary/journal type of writing. Basically everything you read is either from Gems diary, or from Pearls journal. Idk if anyone would be interested in reading a fic in that format or if I should just write it normal, so a poll shall decide!
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cetoddle · 1 day ago
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every woman on earth is the most beautiful show stopping incredible gorgeous person alive and 90% of men make me go ewwwwww…what is that..
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skhardwarevers1 · 6 months ago
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nobody let me come up with ideas for romcoms
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caffeinatedopossum · 2 years ago
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I don't understand why it's generally not socially acceptable to recognize your good qualities. Like I don't understand why it's bad to be a show-off or a know-it-all or to brag. Like I think most people know "those things = bad" but not why.
It also seems like people are always either waaaaay into one end of the scale where they are just so unbearably full of themselves and have preposterously high self esteem (and most people act like this is fine too? Like a lot of celebrities and white men specifically seem to be like this) and I don't understand why so many people respect them then. Or they're the complete opposite with self esteem way too low despite the fact that they have redeeming qualities.
I feel like maybe the reason it's considered bad to brag is because you might 'make' other people feel inadequate but see that seems like a stupid reason to me because the problem then is not that you stated an opinion of your own self worth but is actually that everyone else is conditioned to compare themselves to each other in a very unhealthy way. And I think instead of discouraging people from opening up about what they take pride in, what they like about themselves, what makes them feel happy or content or confident, maybe we could just be discouraging people from viewing those things as personal threats? Idk just trying to formulate some thoughts on this
#idk why but this feels like a very convoluted topic#like so many people are probably coming from different starting positions on this than i am and im afraid that might#make it be misinterpreted or something#like i feel like there definitely is a balance where some self esteem is too little and some is too much#it just feels like it is exceedingly rare to find anyone with ideal realistic self esteem and idk why#i also dont mean this in a way to say that every action is the responsibility of the people taking offense either#because obviously thats not how that works. its understandable to demand a certain amount of respect#and to accept that your words (even the ones you say about yourself) could negatively impact other people#and thats not necessarily on them for being defensive#idk social concepts are strange and foreign to me so im still figuring this stuff out and through an autistic lense to boot#so sometimes i feel a bit like im conducting a study or an experiment more than writing a blog post#im just trying to understand people because i need to#it seems like the overwhelming majority of allistics have absolutely no interest in why they do the things that they do#so i have to go around experimenting instead of asking direct questions about this stuff#because when i do ask direct questions they look at me like i just asked them if the sky is actually blue or if its just gasses up there#in case you are not the most common dimwit. the sky is both of those things. however when you ask someone a question#phrased like that about a topic they dont want to admit they dont know about. they will usually avoid the question or answer absurdly#its actually kinda funny you should try it sometime#now im distracted because i dont know enough about how the sky works and i need to know#anyways gonna go down a research rabbit hole methinks
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daz4i · 4 months ago
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there's smth to study about how qliphoth's name comes from hebrew and is a term in kabbalah, and how it represents anything that isn't holy, and how the aeon themselves may be like the noga shell specifically - the one representing "anything that's not holy but also isn't a sin" (so basically, neutral actions) - while the ipc is more like the three shells of impurity - the ones representing. well. sin and impurity. especially with jade symbolically being the devil who is indeed a part of the qlipoth (as samael). from what i know abt genshin it sounds like hoyo doesn't shy away from kabbalah so it's more than plausible to look for a connection there imo
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certifiedwerewolf · 9 months ago
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Isn't Riz like canonically aro/ace? Why are there so many fic shipping him with Fabian?
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