#and this is all not to mention that theyll say this stupid shit and then deny eastern europeans the things they actually did that were good

[tommygettingwrittenoff]

i just think if roles were reversed and buck was the one saying those gay ass lines to eddie, eddie wouldve proposed like four seasons ago

[storywestistrash]

i am actually so tired of the way westerners treat eastern europeans

[jolapeno]

I hope you are enjoying your first day off. You’ve mentioned before that Helen gives Ghost the silent treatment when she’s mad at him? But how does he get her to forgiven him? Just after some real fluff today.

aww, i’ve mainly napped if i am very honest, but it has been nice to do so. i have tried to be fluffy, but i am an angsty-bitch, so.

most of their arguments start because one of them chooses to put themselves in danger, somehow. and for this reason it depends on the severity of the “argument”/“falling out”. sometimes, she just gives silent treatment where she will answer his question super plainly, offering nothing else—and that requires him to just persevere and sit in it. then there’s the “she-wont-even-talk-to-him” silent treatment and usually he’ll bring her food or drinks—because she’ll avoid him like the plague and wont even take care of herself, burying herself in work. eventually he’ll get a soft thank you for a coffee or food, and he’ll hover at the door for longer until he apologises, and then she usually apologises for ignoring him.

they’re both people who bury their feelings into their work, so they kind of know how they operate. for this reason, they both made a promise very early on when they reunited that they wouldnt let arguments go to far—so if, and when they get close to them going too far (after what happened before)—they usually just stop, take a breather and say theyll meet in an hour. normally that allows them to calm down and talk respectfully. both of them meeting sorta helps the other forgive them, because theyve shown up. and thats all helen has ever really asked for from ghost. not flowers, not him to change—just show up if she asks and he can (within reason).

then theres the arguments that are petty and stupid— you’ve ever seen scrubs, youll know the scene—but she’ll follow ghost (outside of briefings) and just talk about absolute shit. she’ll talk until he snaps and apologises, because while he hates her silent treatment, her talking incessantly about bandage tape, needle lengths and curtain types to drive him insane too.

Price juts his head. “What’s up with her?”

Ghost sighs. “Mad at me. But, she can’t give me the silent treatment—knows I’d enjoy it. So, she’s giving me the talk till I rip the room apart, treatment.”

Snorting, Price shakes his head. “Oh to be you, Simon.”

for him, he won’t ignore her. he’s tried and failed. her eyes, begging for forgiveness do something to him—and he suspects it’s why she does it. he’ll be sharp, each word he does speak tinged with anger. she’ll give him space, but she’ll make her presence known. she’ll leave a chocolate by his bed, she’ll leave a pair of her nicer pieces of underwear on his pillow. but mainly, helen apologises. she owns her mistakes, so his forgiveness is already given easily, it’s more processing what’s happened for him.

he’s promises to not go on a mission mid-argument, he’ll always find her, tell her he forgives her, find a way to leave her with a kiss—just in case—and usually by the time he returns, it’s all forgotten about. the two of them just happy to be together.

[ghostrockband]

any crazy work stories?

The first night i worked barback it was like 1145 and we were dead and so we started preclosing and shit but literally as we started we got hit w a huge rush of dumbass frat kids who all ordered "the cheapest beer we had" or like tequila shots and wld tip like 1 dollar if we were lucky and they proceeded to just fuck around and play pool for an hour without ordering much else. And u know this isnt rly like out of the realm of possibility, its a college bar more or less and its sorta past all the bars on the main strip of the area. So ppl will filter down here at the end of the night and thats when shit can get kinda fucked and annoyingggg cuz theyre so fuckin loud and entitled and annoying as previously stated. Also it was crazy bc if u moved from the back of the bar to the front there was just a wall of fartsmell from these kids it was just so wack. I shld also mention that when i say kids theyre all over 21 and like my age and shit but theyre just like stupid and inexperienced and always make me feel like im old as fuck in comparison but u dont have 2 feel bad that im like infantilizing them or anything cuz theyre all lil rich boys and shit and im just a little worker.

So anyways the frat rush wore on and the bartender had me go around and do last call and like. I dont think kids these days rly get the concept of last call or maybe frat kids r just so fucking entitled they think theyll always get special privelege but literally these ppl will come up like 20 mins after u call last call amd be like pweeeease can i have another shot pwease and like the bartender kept sorta hedging it and not rly enforcing last call very well but whatever, it made it hard when we made our third and final last call bc all these guys thought thwy cld try some shit and when we finally didnt serve them they just got super indignant and loudly plotted our murders and sayin shit like they were gonna wait for us outside but ofc they didnt bc like at the end of the day drunk ppl say all sorts of shit they dont mean at all and like frat kids round here arent gonna follow thru on that shit. So they start filtering out.

10 minutes before we close this like group of kids in suits come down and theyre like pweeeease can wr play pool we just wanna play pool for 15 minutes we promise we wont order anything and leave after 15 mins. And in my head im like why do u think thats a selling point. And they were like we wont order anything and tip u 10 bucks if we can stay and i was like nah we're gonna close like i wanna go home and shit sorry man. And they were like well can we use ur bathroom at least and i was like sure whatever and then they started whispering shiftily and i was like ughhhh fucks sake and sure enough they go back and the bartender walks back there and theyre tryna break the damn paper towel dispenser off the wall cuz these dudes r so fuckin incensed that we wont serve them while we're trying 2 fucking heard all these kids out so we can close.

Greek life is a fucking worthless scourge and i hate serving them. But idk if id call that crazy

[nebuvoid]

years ago when i first came into my nonbinary identity i kinda...fell for? that feels like it was a trick. but the whole "nonbinary is a certain thing" shtick so i was like well i want the boobs GONE. because thats what nonbinary is and wants right?

so i bought an expensive binder, tried it for some time. (wore it while carrying shit to my 3rd story new apartment back then, incredibly stupid), only to realize i actually fucking hate it. part of it was that i despise when my belly sticks out more than my chest, internalized fatphobia and certain ideas of beauty that only hinder yourself etc.

but it also made me realize that i do actually identify with the shape of my body. i like the curves, i like seeing my front and side in the mirror and seeing the clear silhouette. yeah id like to be "firmer", not thinner, theres a difference. you take my curves away and ill actually feel like shit. this is part of my identity.

the issue was never my body, not really. its how society and people place certain expectations on you as a woman. and it never felt right. i didnt feel right ever since i was 13 and everyone hit puberty and things changed according to those set rules and i never got it. i was sad and angry all the time. i mean for many other reasons beside that one but. it was always there. i just didnt have words for it until i was into my twenties.

i didnt "decide to be" nonbinary. in a world with no gender roles i wouldnt even think of these things. but because this is reality and "im just me" is not a viable answer for people.. like if you say that theyll be like ok got it, "woman who thinks shes special" it is. so nonbinary is the best option to give a clear sign that youre other. to me anyway i do not mean to put words into other peoples mouth.

even this doesnt feel like its quite "it". i guess i still dont have the words. genderquoi except gender-leave-me-alone-do-not-fucking-presume

P.S. i forgot to mention ive always had severe tokophobia and having-a-period repulsion. it feels relevant to mention this

[winderlylandchime]

WE ARE ON 3x07! 1/2 *pauses tv on Brian getting head and looks at me* ‘how awkward do you think this was to film? Like i know it’s a job but what if…he actually gets turned on?’ (This is the moment where I actually thought about telling him Gale is straight but went against it to not “ruin” the magic) *starts ep again* ‘oh shit, Ted is in deep shit isnt he? THIS IS BULLSHIT!’ *ethan pops up, he pauses the tv and smacks his head* ‘OH COME ON! There’s no escaping this fucker is there?! OH WAIT JUSTIN DIDNT TELL HIM HE SAW HIM? nevermind. i forgot Justin can drive. Why couldn’t he ever drive Brian’s car? WHY DIDNT HE TELL YOU? WHAT DID HE SEE? OH THOSE ARE THE WORDS OF A MAN TERRIFIED THAT HIS BULLSHIT ROMANTIC ACT IS GONNA BE EXPOSED! Oh he was a muuuusic student? bro be fucking for real. Justin sounds like HE is jealous? Dude. Bro. You’d have a stroke if someone mentioned Brian right now. (ethan says fans will think he’s sexy) Oh god, I’m actually afraid that if i roll my eyes one more time that theyll get stuck.‘ ‘FUCK YOU COP BOY! HE HAS A SON! Dude, Gus’ dad is literally every parents nightmare when it comes to role models. BRI WHY WOULD YOU BRING HIM TO LIBERTY! HE IS LITERALLY TALKING ABOUT YOUR FAVORITE PLACES! How can he not realize this is bad? I’m sorry but he isn’t dumb, so this is all bullshit. There is NOTHING to clean up at liberty. He’ll whip his ass? Oh he’s gay for sure’ ‘I think I should give Ted a lesson into how to talk to your mom on the phone. We have a lovely relationship! I tell her about my recovery and Brian and how Justin is stupid for leaving and she tells me to go fuck myself and then asks about my day and tells me she loves me. It’s perfect.’ ‘Sooo instead of talking to his boyfriend and being like either you stop drugging your tushy or im out, he’s making his best friends ex boyfriend draw him? Mike, be honest with me..where were you on the day when the good lord was giving away a brain that worked?’ ‘WHY ARE WE HYPING UP ETHAN? WE HATE ETHAN? Why did we never hype up Brian! HUH DEBBIE?’ Mel said shes not most women after she had a negative pregnancy test ‘you’re right, “most” women dont annoy me this much. And “most” women would go to the sperm bank instead of the best friend of the previous donor that they oh so hate’ ‘BRIAN! God i hate that car. OH TEDDY! (brian says hed sue if he was ted bc of the photo) Remember when he said he’s gonna sue that guy for saying he’s 31? That was funny. And a better time. Lets go back to the coupley brian and justin. I miss that. BRIAN WHAT THE FUCK?! TED IS YOUR FRIEND! WHAT IS GOING ON? Tell me how did he plan on driving with snow all over his peanut car?’ ‘DAPHNEE i love her! DID YOU SEE THAT FACE! SHE HATES THAT KAZOO FUCKER JUST AS MUCH AS I DO! COMES FROM LIVING WITH BRIAN?! FUCK YOU JUSTIN! Bri didnt cheat! He wasnt sneaking around. You knew cause he told you. How are you gonna blame him for that? THANK YOU DAPHNE HE WAS HONEST! I knew you and i would get along! Now give me Jen and Daphne and Brian together! Oh my god Justin, who are you trying to convince that you love him and arent worried he cheated? Me or you?’ ‘BRIAN! It’s my boy Brian! Working on a homophobes commercial. This is pure bullshit! He would never. EMMETT AND BRI BRI! Why is Brian suddenly such a horrible friend to them? What is going on? This isn’t normal? THATS RIGHT EMY TELL HIM! He DOES care about his friends even if he acts like he doesn’t. I feel like Emmett is the only one who can kinda scare Brian. Bri Bri, this is bullshit why are you doing this to me? He’s just a little lost because of Justin. I’m sure of it, right? *looks at me all scared*’ Stockwell and Brian are currently in a steam room ‘oh this is the first hetero steam room he’s been in, huh? exactly Brian! Help Ted! Oh this dude is for sure gay. WHY DOES IT ALWAYS GIVE ME ETHAN AFTER BRIAN?!’ HE THEN PAUSED THE TV TO GO ON A SMOKE AND I WAS ACTUALLY ANGRY BC THEE SCENE IS UP!!!

I feel like Emmett is the only one who can kinda scare Brian. <- YEP

I am just going to present this without comment because my comments are all "yes" and "right on" and "exactly."

[synchlora]

have to talk w my parents abt college oh no

[winderrific-moved]

ah. right

[letstalkaboutshtufff]

A Bad Feeling Pt 1

Levi x Reader

Part 1

Paring: Levi Ackerman x Cadet reader

Warnings: 18+ attempted rape/assault, cursing, mention of injury, violence

Summary: Reader feels uncomfortable around a overly friendly captain. Are they just over reacting? Or is there something else going on. What will Levi do when he finds out?

***************************************************

A.n. ok so I literally wrote this in one go, it's probably trash but I wanted to post it anyway. Please lemme know what you think in the comments! Thank you!

"Y/n! captain Oro is asking for you" you did your best to hide the discomfort Armins words made you feel.

You smiled what you hoped was a convincing one and nodded. With a deep breath you made your way to Captains Oro's office.

Ever since you had been introduced to him those few weeks ago, he had taken a special liking to you. At first you had been excited, having such a highly skilled and well known captain take notice of you was one of the best feelings. Especially since your squad leader, Levi wasn't exactly heavy on praise.

Everyone loved Captain Oro, he was known for his strength and stamina on the battle field. He was both charismatic, and charming. Your fellow cadets practically swooned over him. You couldn't help but also get caught up in his perfection. At first that is..

Over time you noticed things about your meetings that put you on edge. An unnecessary shoulder touch here, a too low pat on the back there. Something was off. And although you had done your best to distance yourself from him, it was hard when your squads often had to work together.

But it was hard to say anything against him because even your cold blooded captain seemed to enjoy his presence.

Once you brought it up to your friend Sasha, about how you felt he was being too friendly. But she waved her hand and basically said you were worrying for nothing, he was just a friendly guy. And you were being dramatic.

Maybe you were overreacting? If captain levi approved of him, surely that meant he was a decent person right? Maybe he was just being really really friendly.

You decided to give him a chance and knocked on his door when you finally arrived.

"Come in" a muffled voice came from the other side.

With a click you entered the candlelit room. It was nearing sundown after all.

"Ah cadet y/n! Perfect, I was wondering if I might ask your opinion on something?" He smiled angelically and gestured towards a parchment on his desk.

"Of course sir" you nodded and approached him, reminding yourself of what sasha said. Just relax.

From the way the parchment was positioned you had no choice but to come to his side of the desk.

"Do you see this area here?" He gestured to what you now saw was a map. "What do you think of leading a squad through here instead of what we originally planned?"

The next 30 minutes you spent completely and professionally discussing strategies. Being the member of your squad that was best at this, made him asking for you completely justified. You felt bad for ever doubting his intentions.

"Thank you y/n, I think I have a better idea of what course we should pursue on our next expedition" he smiled sincerely.

"I'm glad I could be of service" you nodded and allowed a relaxed smile to pass your features. Feeling stupid you had judged him so harshly.

" If you wouldnt mind just one more thing?" You nodded as he pulled out a stack of papers.

"If you could look over this report of the last mission before I send it out? See if theres anything else to add?"

"Sure, I'd be happy to Captain" you grabbed the stack.

"And please if you can, return them to me tonight, I'll need them for the meeting bright and early"

"Yes sir, I'll finish it asap, good evening" and with that you exused yourself.

Tonight? It was already sundown. Well whatever, hes so busy he probably doesn't know what time of day it is.

You found a quiet spot amonsgt the crowds in the common room and got to work.

************************************

"Oi brat, it's passed curfew, go to your room now, we have important work tommorow" the unmistakable voice of your captain rang through the now empty hall.

You looked up in surprise and meet his usual scowl, not even realizing how late it had gotten.

"Hai, s-sorry captain, I'll go now" you gathered the report and quickly left, not wanting to receive another scolding for taking too long.

Oh crap you still had to deliever the report. Changing routes you snuck quietly down the familiar hallways. Not particularly feeling like running into Levi again. Something about him always made you act just a little dumber and it was definitely not because of your non existent crush on him...definitely not.. he was just intimidating is all.

*knock knock*

You waited patiently but there was no answer. Crap did he already go to bed? But he knew I was coming? Ugh what should I do? He needs these reports..

With a sigh you change direction again and head for his personal chambers. There was no way you were getting in trouble for not delivering these reports on time.

You smiled when you saw dim light flood from beneath the door.

Lightly you knocked, "Captain Oro, its y/n, sorry it's so late but I have the rep-" you were cut off abruptly when the door swung open and there stood Oro.

Except he looked nothing like the Oro you were used too seeing. His hair was loose from it's normal slicked back do, and the edges were dripping slightly. His shirt was loosely thrown on revealing a decent amount of skin. He must've just bathed.. you could see why the girls were so obsessed with him. He was, platonically speaking, a very gorgeous man.

You were taken aback but reminded yourself that you did knock after hours so of course he wasnt going to be all soldiered up.

"U-um s-sorry Captain, I have the reports" you averted your eyes and shoved the reports in his direction.

"Ah y/n, thank you, would you please put them on my table? My hands are still slightly wet." He laughed holding them up innocently.

"S-sure" god why were you stuttering so much, you fight goddamn titans for a living?! But somehow you were more nervous now than when a 10meter was clawing at you.

You entered the room and tried to avoid looking around too much.

You always wondered what the inside of the higher ups rooms look-

*click*

You whipped around, alarm bells suddenly back in full force.

"Captain what are you-"

"You're such a good girl, you know that y/n?" Oros whole demeanor changed and you cursed yourself for not trusting your earlier instincts.

"U-um" you really did not know what to say or do as he took a couple steps closer.

"Always so obedient for me, I think you deserve a reward don't you?"

Shit

"That's not...that's not necessary captain, I really should be going" you tried to lunge for the door but he was quicker and much much stronger.

"I don't believe I dismissed you cadet..." he purred pinning your arms to the door in the blink of an eye.

You were by no means weak, but your struggles were useless against him.

"Let me go" it took all your strength not to stutter in fear.

"How adorable, you know I love it when you follow my orders so well, but I think..." you shivered in disgust as you felt his lips near your neck and press down.

"I'd like to see you fight me as well" you whimpered as he sucked and bit down on the soft flesh.

"S-stop it, p-please" he smirked and looked into your fearful eyes with his lustful ones. "Stop? But that's not what you really want is it? You see I know exactly how girls like you are" he chuckled darkly and moved one of his hands to grip both your arms, while the other slid lower. You gasped when he cupped your breast. "S-stop! I'll, ill scream If you don't!" You felt a tear slide down your shaking form.

"Scream?" He snickered like you had told the funniest joke.

"Go ahead and scream doll, itll be very interesting to see what happens"

"W-what?" You were utterly confused.

"Think about it, if someone walks in on us, what would they think? Seeing a cadet after hours in her superiors chambers?"

"B-but I! I was bringing the reports i wasn't-!"

"Do you honestly think theyll care what you have to say? Who do you think theyll believe y/n? You a nobody cadet who's been fighting titans for 3 seconds? Or me, a selfless hero whos saved countless of scouts lives? All I have to tell them is that you came into my room and tried to seduce me. When I tried to restrain you, you screamed. Who do you think theyll listen too? Why else would you be here so late at night?"

"Y-You're..you're insane, you're not a hero, y-you're a coward who-" he grasped your jaw harshly causing you to wince.

"I'd watch that mouth of yours y/n" he squeezed harder. I am your superior after all, and we wouldnt want any nasty rumors going around that would have you suspended from the survey corps now would we?" He bent down and to your horror pressed his lips against yours.

Fuck fuck what do I do?!? Hes blackmailing me now. I cant fight him, hes too strong, think think think.

But your mind was blank when his cold lips pressed against your lips again. "Open your mouth" he ordered in a voice laced with animilistac lust.

You abruptly turned your head away desperate to get away.

"Heh, always such a tease" he traced a finger up and down your cheek, flipping over your lips. "I'll enjoy this-"

"CAPTAIN ORO, COMMANDER ERWIN REQUESTS YOUR PRESENCE IN HIS OFFICE IMMEDIATELY" a voice shouts from the other side of the locked door.

With an annoyed sigh, Oro pulls away slightly, "Did he say why?" He lazily looks over in the direction of the door.

"NO SIR!"

"guess it can't be helped... Alright tell him I'll be there shortly" he yelled out.

"Hai" the footsteps recended and you stood deathly still.

He pulled away from you and you immediately pulled your wrists to you, they were an angry red, and it scared you how much strength he had so effortlessly displayed.

"Sorry doll, it looks like we'll have to continue this another night" he stepped away and began dressing normally as if he hadn't just been assaulting you 5 second ago. You quickly make for the door but his voice falters your step, "Oh and y/n?"

You dont look at him, but fear held you in place until he finished, "If you mention our little moment to anyone, you know what will happen" you nodded quickly, anything to appease him and get out.

When the door shut behind you, you felt the flood of tears break through.

D-did, d-did that really happen?!?

You held a hand to quiet your sobs and quickly dashed through the hallways.

You're heart thumped and you felt the need to vomit. You hadn't felt this way since the first time youd encounted a titan. All you wanted to do was get to the safety of your room, just through the hall.

It felt like a bucket of cold water had been thrown on you when a cold voice shouted out and halted your movements. Please not now, oh god any time but now.

"Oi cadet y/n are you deaf as well as dumb? I asked you a question.

"Why are you out past curfew?" he sounded definitely annoyed and you gathered all your strength to hold the sobs out of your voice.

Without turning around you answered, "I-I had to deliver some r-reports..I'll head to my room now.." you stepped forward hoping he would let you go but you were not so lucky.

"Oi brat, did you hit your head? I didn't dismiss you yet. Not to mention you haven't even addressed me properly, maybe some time cleaning up horse shit will remind you how to respect your superiors" fuck he was definitely angry now.

Still you didn't turn around, you couldn't..."S-sorry Captain Levi, I'll do better in the future.." you barely could even focus on the words coming out of your mouth, your heart was beating a mile a minute. Please just leave me alone!

"Hahh" Levi uttered in disbelief and severe annoyance, even the most novice of cadets turn around when being spoken to by a superior. "Are you trying to piss me off brat?!?"

"No sir..." still you didnt turn around, but gulped in fear when you heard sharp footsteps near you.

"Cadet y/n, you have three seconds to turn around and salute me properly before I throw you into the cells for insubordination" he ordered in his dangerously calm voice, that you never thought would be directed at you.

Having no other choice you slowly turn around, hoping to god the darkness of the room would be enough to hide your current state.

You kept your head down, letting your hair fall over your face, but gave a proper salute. Hiding the Wince that came when the tender flesh of your wrist had to bend.

Your eyes were trained on the floor. And you tried to remember how to breathe normally again.

"At least you remember how to-" abruptly his harsh scolding stopped.

Why did he stop?! Fuck did he notice something. No no calm down, he probably just is coming up with another punishment...right?

Wrong...

Levi was far from being done with dicisplining you but he caught sight of your bruised wrist and furrowed his brows immediately. He knew for a fact the last time you spoke in the hall those had not been there. He was quick to take in the rest of your demeanor and knew immediately that the reason you were acting disrespectful was because something was wrong.

"Cadet y/n.." he said suspiciously slow and not full of anger anymore.

"Y-yes?" Please dont ask me, please dont ask me, please dont-

"Look at me"

*******************************

Part 2 here

Okay so that's part 1! Please comment and lemme know what you think🥰also I'm super sensitive so please no hateful comments. Thanks for reading!

[jujutsu-headcanons]

Yuuji is 100% a himbo and is so incredibly dense that it bothers everyone. Like how can one boi be this dumb??? this pure?? then theres Sukuna, the total opposite but yuuji def grows on him. (not like they have a choice since theyre stuck together but still) Also Yuuji and Sukuna 100% have a weird fam/sibling bond dont @ me. Theyll fight abb stupid shit n get into really petty arguments and I wholeheartedly believe that if Yuuji ever holds someones hand sukuna will lick them for shiggles.

These are canon because I say so

If people think that I'm Gege-sensei's secret tumblr then I have that power

Did you know I had to Google what a himbo was when I joined the jjk fandom because literally everyone calls him that? And when I found out what the word meant I couldn't stop? Like seriously his picture is next to the word in the dictionary. I hate him, and I say that in the most endearing way possible. He's an absolute idiot, and I seriously think it's because he's mentally still a child. If you wanna be technical, kids mature kinda fast these days. By the age of fifteen we usually think we're adults, and some of us even have to think/act like adults. But Yuji wasn't really exposed to anything (that we know of) other than his grandpa being ill and being hospitalized. Now I can speak from personal experience, that can make you mature pretty quickly. I think if we look at the differences between chapter one and now he has matured, but he still holds on to his childlike nature. Honestly he was probably given this personality to further Gojo's hatred of training shamans so young and "robbing their youth" to just prove his theory further. Even Megumi, of all people, can act childish because he's kinda still a kid too, he was just exposed to way more shit as a kid mostly Gojo and it made him mature faster.

And you're right about Sukuna. They're literally living the non-romantic trope of "opposites attract" and he hates it so much. And I won't argue with anyone on this because you're 100% right, Sukuna has grown fond of Yuji. He hates it. He calls it going "soft". He literally acts like he wish he possessed anyone else but he loves the brat.

I like to think Sukuna isn't hostile all the time. Like seriously, he's pretty angry for an old man but he has to get bored some time. I like to think one night he woke Yuji up in the middle of the night to learn about the modern world. "show me that little box thing with the light on it. Yea, your phone. Show me pictures." You can't tell me he isn't curious about what's happened in the past thousand years

Wait until he finds out he has his own wiki page you know he wants to know what people think of him. Just a sassy Sukuna going "oh that is so not how it happened!!"

And when he gets to know more about the modern world chaos ensues. "Yea yea that Jennifer bimbo is cute but have you seen Scarlett Johansson???" And all the sudden Yuji is just having a one sided argument because did I mention Sukuna is still in Yuji's head and it looks like he's just talking to himself

Not to mention they argue about stupid shit like "this is our body now brat please stop stuffing junk food in it" and "can you please stop talking about cheese Sukuna i have class in like three hours" and it's just a riot

I have this headcanon about Nobara toward the other boys, but I feel like Sukuna has the whole "yea this is my brat I beat him up and belittle him but he's MY brat I'm the only one allowed to tell him his hair looks weird shut UP" they would so be brothers in another life

I think Yuji gets touchy when someone's upset "let me love you!!!" "Uhhh do you need a hug?" "The best I can offer is a rub on the back" so he does hold people's hands often and Sukuna licks/bites then sbd does not help at all. I also think if Yuji covers one of the mouths with his hand he gets licked/bitten, and Sukuna probably steals food out of Yuji's hand just to make him sad. Sukuna torments this poor child

Sorry for typos and shit I'm writing in s hurry and my keyboard decided to stop autocorrecting half way through lmao

EDIT: I feel it important to mention that I'm making a separate list of headcanons that's just gonna be Sukuna and Yuji snd all the shit they do to each other and shit it's gonna be hilarious

[lunatic-fandom-space]

Alright, Period Cramps just set in and Im looking for songs anyway so Im gonna be listening to every RWBY Song (V1-V7) in chronological order and rank them, starting with the worst. Lets go!

Caffeine: Thank god the team with the Nazi-based leader has the shittiest song so far.

Celebrate: Why tf is this here

Shine: Ehhhh. I dont really know why but the vibes were all off, somehow. The fact that really dislike Jaune (and as an extension, Arkos) doesn't help either.

Forever Fall: This song was 5 minutes long and it felt like 20

Brand New Day: I barely even registered that

Fear: not the worst

Lets Get Real: Either Im too tired or the songs are getting worse

War: Im ranking this one higher because it wasnt over 4 minutes

Bmblb: All the love songs are so generic

Dream Come True: Im listening to all these songs in the form of Lyric Videos and the art used in this one made me think 'Oh, a Jaune Song... Great. Well, maybe we'll get Jaune pining after Phyrrah now! Yknow, to balance it out. A cute lil song of him pining for a nice girl might me like him a bit more!' and guess what. It wasnt that. It was another Arkos Song from Phyrrahs perspective. AND this one had unnecessary Girl-Hate towards Weiss! For no reason! The only reason its above Shine is because they atleast got the vibes right this time.

Not Fall In Love With You: I think Im just not a big fan of the love songs.

Boop: It was pretty cute but nothing to write home about

Until The End: slow piano

Touch The Sky: Its not that bad, its just that Im tired and this song is too goddamn long

This Time (From Shadows II): A just fine song for a shitty arc

I Burn: I liked fine, until they started rapping.

Like Morning Follows Night: I thought this was gonna be one of the better love songs, then he started rapping.

Smile: All this does is make me question how Ilia was in the wrong even more. Sounded alright though.

The Triumph: Eh, pretty unremarkable opening for an unremarkable volume

This Will Be The Day: A very promising start! There's honestly not much to say here

From Shadows: It was fine. I liked the overall sound but the lyrics and the singing are just a bit too edgy for me.

Bad Luck Charm: Someone in the comments under the lyrics video said "looks like someone found his middleschool poetry" and honestly, yeah.

I May Fall: Hey, yknow how the FoB was apparently meant to happen in Volume 1? Yeah. Overall, I thought it was pretty alright. (You can probably already tell that Im not too big of a fan of the louder, more energetic songs so far.....

Trust Love: This is by no means a problem I have with only this song, but I hate how theyre all like "oh this isnt some FaIrYtAlE kid, this is real n dark n shit" as if RWBY isnt the least dark and least subversive story Ive seen in recent time

Rising: Alright but unremarkable

Miracle: Another alright but unremarkable one. At this point I feel like listening to these songs is frying my brain

Ignite: I was just gonna say its an alright Yang Song but that rap...

Big Metal Shoe: I can appreciate some fairy tale references

Gold: The chorus got a bit repetitive but I thought it was pretty cute

Home: Another cute lil family song! This one was kinda long though

Lionized: I really appreciate the vibe of this song

All Our Days: Adorable! I didnt really expect a Taiyang Song but this was pretty nice

Sacrifice: Not really much go say about this one, I thought it was fine

Neon: I feel like I just got aggressively flexed on in the nicest, yet most condescending way possible

Lusus Naturae: Very edgy, but in a way that I can appreciate more

Red Like Roses I: I really like the sound of this one! I kinda wish we had more lyrics, but this was the song used in the Red Trailer so Im assuming it was made to compliment the action more than anything. At the start and end there was this series of notes, that Im assuming is gonna be the Leitmotiv? Either way, Im curious how theyll use it

All Things Must Die: I feel like this song is definitely at its best during the slower bits

Lets Just Live: First of all, I cant believe they live-laugh-loved us. They kept mentioning like, stories and how 'this isnt your TYPICAL fairytale', I could practically feel the writers being like "Huh, huuuuuuuh? Arent we CLEVER? Yes we are, yes we are!" But other than it was mostly fine. A bit long, maybe.

Armed And Ready: Pretty alright Yang Song, I felt like it was just a bit too long

It's My Turn: Not much to say, I thought it was a fine Weiss Song

Nevermore: I think its good

Wings: I really enjoyed this song! Caseys voice is lovely and I think its a very good Blake Song

Indomitable: I liked this one, but I feel like its mainly because the line "the spirit is indomitable" reminds of Flame from VRAINS

When It Falls: This song is trying very hard to convince you that RWBY is Dark Now. And given that Im pretty sure this is V3s opening, I guess it fits. Oh well, it still sounded pretty nice.

One Thing: A real slappin song thats going straight to my YGO-playlist as well

All That Matters: Very neat song about Yang's conflicting feelings on Blake's return. Shame theyre literally not conveyed at all in the show.

Die: Very agressive title, but okay. I also enjoyed this one, who wouldve guessed. I love this whole vibe of Desperate Heroism In A World In Ruin, yknow? Its there in Time To Say Goodbye and Red Like Roses II (two of my favourite songs so far) too. Though it is quite dissapointing that the show never really matched it.

Hero: I dont get how people can look at this and go "yeah, Ironwood was clearly always a tyrant who never even remotely cared for others". Also Caleb Hyles my beloved

Time To Say Goodbye: Another very nice song! I also think the foreshadowing in the third verse (yknow the slow one) was quite well done. The only real issue is, that the plot point its foreshadowing is stupid as hell

The Path To Isolation: Why is Weiss a better character in her songs?

Divide: This song is trying very hard to convince you that RWBY is Dark Now pt 2. It is a banger though, so its fine.

Mirror Mirror: Funfact: This was technically the first RWBY-Thing Ive ever consumed! A Youtuber named Strawbelly made a german cover of this song (and the songs from the other trailers, I believe) and it was one of my favourites for a while. Ive also already listened to some of Weiss' other songs and I remember enjoying them too. I can definitely already tell that I prefer Caseys voice in the slower songs, so I really hope this keeps up

This Life Is Mine: Yoooooooooo, Caseys voice was amazing in this one(especially at the very start)! This is one of the Weiss Songs I listened to before I even watched RWBY and what can I say, I loved it back then and I love it now

I'm The One: Oh, this was absolutely lovely. For the first few seconds I thought I wouldnt like this one, but its a banger! I love the lyrics too, theyre very clever I think

Red Like Roses II: DUDE, I adored this! I did not expect there to be lyrics for Summer at all and I was so pleasently surprised! Sandra's voice was lovely, and I really hope I'll get to hear her again. But on a slightly more negative note, I feel like this is really where the whole 'RWBYs Songs Characterize The Protagonists In A More Compelling Way Than The Show Does'-Problem starts.

I originally wanted to write some kind of conclusion but Im tired and wanna read angst fics. Have a good night!

[mihotose]

okok itd be tedious making all these separate posts even tho i badly want to

love that he started with his book description + his pose

i think its really funny that they said he “narrated his life” in the jlod video since he did that for like five minutes max

havent watched kishou hongi so no idea what hes on about however the very mention of monoyoshi had me tearing up the first time

monoyoshi forcing his smile !!! ill talk about this later i love how these two contrast each other

him visiting everybody in the honmaru before he leaves got me :’‘‘‘‘‘)

everyone loves him so so so much!!!!! integral part of the honmaru

i didnt realise he was like speaking to specific people until he got to like urashima the first time and thats only bc he said kamekichi

so the second time i paid more attention and the things he said :’‘‘‘) some of my favourites:

imanotsurugi wanting to play with him so he told him to wait until he got back

so the shinsengumi have returned from their own journeys hm? i wonder if theyll expand on that or not lol

(as a matter of fact, so has imanotsurugi

really curious as to whether theyll do anything with those

saying he’ll have a drinking contest with hachisuka when he gets back lmao

saying he’ll take care of his hair to izuminokami (tho im realising hachisuka and izuminokami might be the other way round? i think hachisuka would be more likely for the drinking contest tho bc he can actually hold his liquor)

urashima trying to give him kamekichi!!!

matsui having a nosebleed smh

literally every time he talked about mihotose-gumi the stream cut out what a fucking curse

“sengo muramasa-san” tho. very interesting. distance, hm?

i wonder why they cut out aruji’s lines this time, since i havent watched any shows past 2018 is that the case now?

THE DANCE. i totally saw yuu’s choreo in this :’)

in my notes i keep saying i cry at mihotose-gumi but dont say what he said about them smh

muramasa gave nobuyasu poisonous flowers?????

i wonder if that was intentional or if that was like Fate trying to get him to kill a tokugawa (and if so how wonderful that he managed to Defy Fate)

the fact that he himself doesn’t know when hes lying and when hes telling the truth (so many layers to him he doesnt know when hes acting or not :/

ah the concept of nikkari being Stained my beloved.

TE NO HIRA

god Hands as a theme in tkrb in gneral tbh

(nikkari only singing his own parts of te no hira so yknow. if ishikirimaru ever gets a tanki they can. um. duet it across time and space.)

it is somewhat ironic that he says he used to be bigger since araki is too tall for him lol

my final note for my first watch just says NO underlined and i dont know what that was about in particular but i wholeheartedly agree

ok switching:

hes literally so beautiful. my god. cant see shit in the full stage view.

nobuyasu smiling “nikkari to” (nikkari’s influence)

“im not good at talking about my personal life” damn really.

this time on switching i could see his leadup to shinken hissatsu

belt first (his belt in hissatsu has confused me for a while now tbh) then the cape then unzipped his jacket and undid his hair

HIS HAIR!! i love it so much and god even tho he doesnt let it out in the game it totally adds to how like Pitiful he is here

god this whole fight sequence. just. absolute mental breakdown. he slowly unravels (like his hair) and gets more and more Disheveled and losing control of himself so much hes Laughing (remember in battle he normally stays pretty cool and says his stupid lines)

literally the fact that he would be willing to Do this just to get stronger so he can Save all his friends from going through all this pain

in the switching he undid his shirt buttons to be more like the hissatsu sprite which was more distracting than anything sfkjksjg

same vein: THREE QUARTER SLEEVES

after hissatsu he realises that everything hes killed, he just gets Stained more and more, even if his shortening did take some of it away

ishikirimaru realised that true strength isnt about defeating enemies, but nikkari also understands that ishikirimaru was able to defeat the kebiishi, which nikkari knows he himself couldnt

i wonder if this is related to his shortening ie he Used to be much stronger and now he feels weak in comparison and is trying to get himself back to that level

“ive never smiled from the bottom of my heart” bc its a mask isnt it!! just a facade !!

the more friends he has to protect the less he smiles !! very waki-ppoi but also how horrifically sad that he feels this way and yet keeps himself so emotionally reserved from the rest of them

THE GHOST WOMAN

I LOVE THAT ARAKI PLAYED HER

mental breakdown 2 !!!!

ok so basically nikkari’s been aware of her this whole time right but felt so guiltridden and regretfully that he couldnt bear to face her

and the fact that he immediately assumed she wanted her revenge on him shows how hes just been living in fear his whole life

THE WAY SHE TOOK CONTROL OF HIS BODY(?) AND REVEALED HIS RIGHT EYE

something that he hides all the time!!! literally exposing him metaphorically and physically

i didnt see how araki moved as the ghost woman the first time but the second time my god hes incredible isnt he

in addition the ghost woman’s robes on his right vs nikkari’s outfit on his left, obviously thats to show the ghost woman in his Right Eye, but idk i get some like. the masculine vs the feminine sides of him?

i love that this whole section with the ghost woman you can see both his eyes for Once !!!

ok. ok. her saying he could change history right there and make it so he doesnt kill her and he almost fucking Kills himself??? hello???

i seriously dont remember how he ended up on his knees after this or the specifics i was just crying my eyes out both times

“i want to smile. is it alright for me to smile?” (im guessing he means Genuinely, not forcing one. so shackled to his history he cant enjoy himself in the moment)

“you may”

“after everything ive done?” SO HEARTBREAKING

the ghost woman Ascends or is no longer malevolent or something now that nikkari’s acknowledged her (just thinking now if this was his ghost repelling power)

then the letters!!!! ive said i wasnt satisfied with them but i really enjoy how tanki has recontextualised them so im happier with them now :-)

if this all happened on his First day (jesus.) then that explains his ghost killing line in his first letter

KIWAME OUTFIT SCREAMS

HES SO BEAUTIFUL

I LOVE HIS CAPE AND HE ACTUALLY USES IT MORE NOW

the final song: doesnt he seem so much happier now hes dealt with things? isnt that wonderful :’‘‘)

its like hes looked around and things are in colour now

ok back to monoyoshi buried in the tags of some post from a while ago i wrote a bunch of words about how nikkari and monoyoshi are like complete opposite waki yet both centred around Smiles

monoyoshi having to Force his smile (something nikkari has always done) greatly alarmed him bc monoyoshi is just a lovely kid and realises he doesnt want any of his friends to go through the same thing (... the same thing he always does)

muramasa does the same thing in mihotose, tries to protect monoyoshi from being tainted, the same thing hes always been

so while monoyoshi is the one to say he’ll protect everyones smiles the same is also true for nikkari, though he doesnt say it (emotionally reserved)

same with nikkari even wishing everyone hadnt even been given life so they wouldnt have to suffer (like he does)

literally you can tell that he feels like his life is just. constant punishment to atone for his sins. keeping the name nikkari, wearing the ghost woman’s robes as a cape to remind himself (of course only one shoulder to remind himself he Could ahve been divine)

so then his kiwame outfit he wears it on both shoulders!! hes more accepting of himself, it seems in his hissatsu sprites the ghost woman is on his side now :’‘‘)

anyway the fact that araki decided to do this for two years, completely solo is so much more insane to me now ive seen it

like yes kiyomitsu and higehiza are ‘tanki’ and ‘souki’ but they all had dancers. nikkari’s is Completely solo.

ok i think im done ill wait for the delay now :-)

[iamtheempress]

A Vegeta x OC Fanfiction (part 4) ¤ ¤ ¤

Calamatta managed to roll out of bed and redress herself. Pulling on the suit and grabbing a spare to bring with her on her trip to To-Rot. Leaving her room she met with Nappa. "There she is!" He chugged a caffeinated hot beverage down like it was nothing, Raditz stood beside him counting his wad of cash and stuffing it in his armor. 

"Pay looks nice." She yawns and stretches making her cute tail curl and back arch abit. "37,000. Not bad but could be better. Vegeta got the most of it." Nappa nods and pushes the yawning female saiyan a mug of the hot beverage. "Thanks...gonna need it." "Damn right you are! Vegeta is still sleeping. Weird he said he was gonna get up before us.. eh whatever. Lets get your pod and stuff ready then well worry bout him." Nappa said as Calamatta shined off the mug and pushed it away.

Upon going to the pod, her coordinates were set and everything was packed into there Raditz, who was standing besides her piped up, leaning against the pod with his massive arms crossed. "Dont take this the wrong way Calamatta but… why are you so…" he moves his hands in an hour glass shape and tilts his head. Calamatta went wide eyed and fixed her suit where her ass is. 

"If thats how you flirt with women that was a strike out, good lord! And I have know idea why! Its just my body shape idiot…" she comments hearing Nappa wheeze as he fixes some wires within the pod, followed by him clanging his head leaving. "Im not! I d-dont flirt its just that… well… shes got… n-nice legs and … a great fa-" Calamatta thwipped her tail like a nervous cat. The bay door slid open and Raditz's poor excuse for flirtation was stopped DEAD in its tracks. "Stop harassing Calamatta on her body type Raditz, Saiyan women were given bodys to kill, shes built like a fine tuned weapon whether you see it or not." Vegeta points up at Raditz who scowled with a full face of blush. "Oh so you look at her too Vegeta?" Calamatta slaps her forehead and raises her voice flicking Raditz in the forehead for his really stupid comment. "Can yall stop talking about me like im not fuckin here??" She snapped annoyed and heard Nappa close up the oxygen port.

 "Ready boss?" She asked Vegeta, who nodded and got into his respective pod and punched in the coordinates manually. "Later guys!" She got in and Raditz and Nappa left the pod evac room. 

Vegeta's voice sparked to life on her scouter. "Theres a hidden base by the most recent Frieza Force there.. we should make it there in an hour so that will be our base of operation. No breaches from outside forces." She nods and for the 2nd time in her life the pod flew straight out of the mothership into the cold vacuum of space. 

She crossed her arms and watched Vegetas whiz right past her hurtling with effort and ease to the planet that only seemed to become larger.. if that wasnt already more possible.

 She marveled at it… it was amazing. It was a shame she was there for a job to do. 

It was under 50 minutes where there pods broke entry to the planets atmosphere, careening and becoming hot to the touch, cold metal heating up faster, and faster becoming scorching red hot. Then the mountain range came into view, with the ship in sight the two pods crashed right into a large cave system. 

Welding their pods into the hard rock walls to jut through with 0 damage just enough room for the pods to open on the opposite side of the mountain. Calamatta and Vegeta pushed the button to open the pod bay doors, they took one solid whif of the atmosphere and Cala sighed. "To-Rot huh.. so wheres the base ship?" Cala steps her boots onto the alien planets surface. "5 miles that way. Stay within the tree line, follow my lead." The prince cracks his neck and blasts away leaving a trail of dust and debris behind him.

 "Say no more.." she stated following close behind Vegeta. Vegetas eyes were trained ahead. Toa ship that was covered in dirt and over growth. He tapped his scouter to be sure. "Perfect.. no signs of power levels. Excellent!" He smirked, the prince and Calamatta landed outside of the ship. Vegeta punched in a code and they were both let in. "Good.. now.. lets have a look around. The recent failed mission logs should have data from their logs. Have a look around for food and whatever else when i find the log ill call for you"  Vegeta announced as the hangar door shut behind them locking followed by a robotic voice. 

'Systems Armed'

Calamatta turned on her heels and scampered to the back of the ship. Vegeta watched the eager Saiyan trot away, with a sigh and a roll of his eye he headed towards the command deck of the ship. 

Collected with dust and opened up first aid kits, Vegeta scanned the surrounding area cautiously. 3 lone scouters covered in blood sat on the front of the deck. An ominous reminder of the past couple of grunts who died here. 

He snagged the three up and turned to call for Calamatta "Found them! Get up here!"

Calamatta dropped this box of rations she found and walked quickly to the front to see him plugging in the scouters logs. An unfamiliar voice chimed to life. 

"F-Force log number 1, we have arrived at To-Rot, this area is to be our base of operation since the inhabitants cannot scale plateaus or fly. We will commence terraformation and return in a week." Vegeta clicked the 2nd video, a bead of sweat rolled down his forehead. 

"F-Force Log number 2… uhm.. Que, Roa, and Gil went missing yesterday. We have been here for 3 days now and i have seen hide nor tail of them... ill send a distress warning to the mother ship but i will go and find my crew." 

He pressed the last one and the room suddenly became much heavier. "F-Force number 3… i found my crew.. w-whats left of them…" he held up baren bones and armor. "This planets fucked up… if you know whats good for you send the Saiyans.. theyll do a better job.. i couldnt save my crew! This is Nutte signing off… i'm going to look for Roa.”

"Thats… not good.." Vegeta groaned and plugged in the next scouter, A new crew came up on the screen, a crew of ten. The crew was looking around, brows raised and sweat on their brow. “So we are the 4th crew to come to this planet alone, from what were aware these uh… the main population of this race is highly hostile and we need to utilize lethal force...Well update as we go along.” After that log there was no update, no commanders log. He stepped away and swiped a hand through his hair. “Last log…”  He clicked on it which was 7 full days ago. 

A Log List of all the times this one computer has been logged into popped up. It was far more then 4.

10 Crew lists came through. Crews of upwards of 5 being the smallest to 30 being the most. All vanished within days of arrival. All of them mentioning, to send someone stronger, someone more capable. The Saiyans, they begged for the Saiyans help and they were all sent on suicide missions back to back to back to back.

Vegeta slammed his hands down on the console making it glitch the screen. “Of course theyd call for us…dammit!” He barked and kept his back turned away from her. “So they sent them on suicide missions because… they didn’t want to send us?” She questioned, furrowing her brows trying to wrap her head around the situation. “Frieza didnt want to send me and the other two… He sent US on a suicide mission.” Vegeta turned quickly and stared daggers into Calamatta, the overwhelming feeling of concern rain heavy within her head, and sat uncomfortably in her stomach like something she shouldnt have eaten.

Vegeta crossed the room and pointed his finger right into her chest a deep growl emanating from behind his bared teeth. “He went and sent ME with YOU so we can both perish!” “Hey hey what the hell! Calm down abit, well make it out of here ill follow orders.” Vegeta’s vein popped out on his forehead, eyes narrowed furious.

 “Thats not my point. Your optimism is the closest thing we have to any cocky behavior! It doesnt surprise me why Frieza sent me to a month long mission..” She put up her hands and once again her heart sunk; she went wide eyed staring into the princes heartlessly infuriated black eyes.

Friezas words rattled in her skull ‘your life is as forfeit to me as it is Vegeta…’

“I dont get why he would send both of us to die.” He turned back around and walked to a table with a map on it. “You stood at Frieza’s side for as long as you have been able to speak, you wanted freedom from him, now you might as well see the harsh reality, he never had any good intentions for you Calamatta. He wants you dead, so much so hell send the both of us to a lethal planet to terraform on our own…” He said flatly, Calamatta remained silent her tail loosely hanging from her waist. Her dignity and pride feeling like it was oozing out of her very pores. “Now get over here and lets get an idea of the land… this moon has two moons and we have to plan accordingly.” The map is very detailed of the entirety of the planet from the red deserts to the lush green forests and then to the grayed out city scapes. All of them giant hot beds of activity, teaming with life as they knew it. 

His orders were direct and bland. Calamatta dragged her feet, depressed. Feeling less and less like a Saiyan by the moment, it wasnt so much Vegeta.. it was how quickly she was starting to realize Frieza was right, and goddamn did it grate her nerves to know that... The idea of freedom is going to be lightyears more heavier then she could imagine, shes not even close and this is what she has to deal with. Calamatta tightened her tail back up around her waist and listened to her Princes expertise plan of attack.

¤ ¤ ¤

Tags:  @memevember @dragonblobz @gonuclear @msgreenverse @fallen--lilith ​ @jimbobslurpnchug @dragonballcollector @nikabriefs @lilhemmo @supremeleadershitlord @thotful-writing ​ @chickiedinner @anti-jaina @lizardhipsdontlie @dragonball-hcs-or-sum-shit ​ @solidsock​

[we8comic]

i was the anon who sent the eyeroll dream thing and genuinely actually do you have any feelings about like dream and by extension sapnap trying to assert themselves into pop off trio streams

because i’m not gonna lie as much as i love dream and sapnap and yeah the going dark thing was funny, they do have this problem where they show up and get confrontational about not being invited and when they do that shit and put everyone on the spot about “being left out” it’s very weird to me you should just accept they want to have a stream alone right..? i was wondering what you thought about that and whether you think they genuinely feel threatened about being left out

like let george hang out with his other friends maybe i doubt they’d do this if it was quackity and karl with anyone else or even just them alone

also i’m too much of a coward to discuss this on my own main idk if you know who this is but i have a feeling it’s smth you agree with and it’s veryyy nice to see someone calling sapnap and dream out for their occasional annoying and stream ruining behaviour

sorry this is so long!! you also totally don’t have to answer btw lmao i just notice the same frustration sometimes through your liveblogging whenever sapnap and dream crash a stream

anonymous: wait wait to add onto my last ask it was the biggest power move for karl to announce that the sex havers only consists of george karl and quackity and i really felt like that was a hint drop from him, i think jokingly adding that anyone else is “a friend of sex havers” was to lessen the impact but i still enjoy the fact that he asserted (and has been asserting) that their group when they’re together is an exclusive trio

i felt it that time he was like yeah well. we were the original sex havers groupchat and i feel like sapnap and dream kinda wriggled themselves into being included like i hope none of this sounds mean i just really want dream and sapnap to understand it’s okay to not be included in everything

oh MAN do i have feelings 😩 dream and sapnap are almost comically emasculated by any little thing that makes them feel inferior and that includes being excluded from things. and i personally feel they have no right to get angry about being left out and to then show up onto their streams to express that theyre upset in front of an audience of thousands. i say this because the other three ALWAYS mention that they dm'd them and invited them to the activity or otherwise said they had reason to believe dream or sapnap wouldnt be available (and even outside of that, theyre not required to tell the other about every single one of their plans lol)

i think getting confrontational about it on stream in the middle of planned activities is childish. take a look at bad for example, who also isnt a part of the trio but doesnt get confrontational about having been left out. the trio is full of lighthearted people, bad came into the call and they asked him if he wanted to join in the game they were playing and he did and that was it. compare that to dream or sapnap and when they join calls. theyre consistently immediately accusatory. the trio will take it in stride (cus again. an audience of over 100k is watching. its really not the time and place to whine and get mad about feeling left out, those are convos to have in private), theyll throw some facts like "we invited you" "you said you were busy" "we already had this planned for a while" etc., then theyll offer an invitation to join. this invitation is usually met w quite frankly STUPID debate about "well why wasnt i included in the first place" like dude. read the room, youre streamers for a living, talk about these things off stream like an adult. plus they literally already said you could join if you still wanted to, whats the problem, why drag it out for longer than it needs to be. it just stalls the stream and their plans and shifts the lighthearted tone into somethin a little more careful (however briefly it might be, it didnt need to happen)

i LOVE karl for saying that theyre their own group and joking that their attitude is why theyre friends of sex havers. it felt like a lighthearted way to lift the mood again and kinda say "hey, we do our own things sometimes, chill"

i cant speak for whether i think they genuinely feel threatened about being left out cus not only do i not know them personally, theyre also not ccs i focus energy on (thats for quackity and george 😌) i DO think that with all the times theyve brought it up when crashing the trio streams, they should really by this point have talked about it off screen. it feels almost like they use the audience as a safety net to avoid the consequence of intruding/being mean cus whoever theyre talking to has to keep a certain face and therefore cant say certain things (might even hazard a guess that off screen they probably still dont REALLY talk about it)

i dont blame them for wanting to be a part of things their friends are doing but i blame them for the way they express that. it makes the atmosphere tense by making it far too personal for something thats visible to a live public audience.

i know theyre around the same age, but the way dream an sapnap handle conflict on screen IS immature vs the way quackity and karl do. quackity and karl have been entertainers for A WHILE and understand how to stay entertaining and theyre far more aware of their audience and the overall mood and how to handle problems and conflict without things getting too tense. dream and sapnap (sapnap moreso) have a habit of being confrontational and not lightening the mood and instead continuing to be mad, making everyone else in the call responsible for the energy of the stream instead of them themselves dealing with the tenseness theyve caused. it makes things awkward and im always hoping itll end fast and that theyd please for the love of god talk about it off stream

thats worded a little dramatically cus its rarely ever THAT bad, but it would be SO much better if it just didnt happen yknow. if they understood that they dont have to be a part of everything their other friends do AND if they understood that getting mad on stream and stalling their plans and souring the vibe isnt the best way to handle it.

tl;dr: theyre their own group who do their own things and arent required to share their plans w the rest of their friends (and usually they dm in advance anyway asking if they wanna be a part of their plans). dream and sapnap feeling excluded isnt something they should get overly heated about on stream (its an immature way to bring up the issue especially without ever offering a solution). these are problems they should talk about off stream where the trio dont have to be so conscious about their audience and its perception. i love karl and quackity for emphasizing that theyre their own group with their own plans and joking that the way they act is WHY theyre not part of the group. i think they deal w it as well as they can and i think dream and sapnap need to learn just a little more spacial awareness and how to handle conflict

edit: quackity/karl/george should be fully able to have their own stream together without anyone else intruding. dream and sapnap arent their bosses, they dont need to run all their plans by them first. if they want to have streams with just their own established group, they should be able to have that.

[patheticfrogarchive]

i hate my job so much like i hate it SO much im in the target pets department and like, idk if any of yall have worked for target (dont) but im the Dedicated Business Owner (TM) which basically just means im responsible for stocking the area and shit. ANYWAY i am STRUGGLING every single day to do all my work and i never get it all done anyway like i am running my ass all over the store trying to do the 600 tasks they throw at me every minute and like theres SO much shit like theres too much theres litearlly no enough room for it all. like i am quite literally out of backroom stocking space and you wanna know what they tell me when i say “uhh im outta room what do i do” they just go “oh wow. we’ll worry about that later” LIKE HELLO??? ARE YOU FUCKING ME???? ARE YOU EATING MY ASS RN??????????? I HAVE 1000+POUNDS OF DOG FOOD IN THE WAY AND UR TELLING ME TO DEAL WITH IT LATER??? YOUVE BEEN TELLING ME THAT FOR 2 MONTHS NOW????

not to MENTION the fact that im not very physically strong and they expect me to be moving LITERAL thousands of pounds of cat litter all over the place BY MYSELF in less than an hour and when i say “um im struggling to do this, any chance I could get some help? or do you have any advice?” THEY LOOK AT ME LIKE IM THE INSANE ONE!!!! AND THEN DONT GIVE ME HELP OR ADVICE!!!

dont even get me STARTED on the shitty fucking HR department. this bitch never answers her goddamn emails and has no joke been on vacation 3 times in the past 4 weeks like BITCH WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!!!!! NOT UR JOB THATS FOR SURE!!!

like i was literally wheezing my way thru work today running all over the place VERY CLEARLY struggling to do all this work and having a hard time lifting 50 pounds above my head on my own and one of my team leaders walked by, just kinda looked at me struggling and went “huh. tough day huh :/” and i was like “YEAH. ANY UPDATE ON THAT SECOND EMPLOYEE I WAS PROMISED???” and he just went “uhhh yeah next week” even tho i was promised some help ALREADY A WEEK AGO

like its gotten to the point where im honestly hoping that im falling behind enough that theyre gonna fire me. like yes i like money but god i hate it there so much. 

ALSO the fact that ive only worked there 8 months and ive already gone thru at least 3 different managers. hell store. i hope it explodes. everyone there is so fucking stupid oh my god 

and then this one fucking bitch beatrice talks down to me SO much i hate it i wanna beat her stupid face in. you know when like, people will talk to you in That way like, when you have obvious social problems and theyll talk to you like youre some kind of freak, like ttheyre very condescending. yeah she talks to me like that ALL the time and it pisses me off and i hate her so goddamn much and fucking mark doesnt wear his goddamn mask and looks at me like im crazy and almost every single person who works there is so fucking stupid they just throw trash all over the place and GOD. its literally one big huge mess i fucking hate it im literally so angry all the time. the other day some fuckhead ran into my cart, knocked everything over, looked at it went “oh. my bad” AND THEN JUST FUCKING WALKED OFF???? THIS ONE BITCH KEEPS SLAMMING DOORS IN MY FACE??????? MY GODDAMN TEAM LEADERS NEVER FUCKING ANSWER THE WALKIE TALKIE WHEN I CALL THEM WHEN I NEED THEM, BUT GET UP MY ASS WHEN I DONT ANSWER IMMEDIATELY????

THEY HAVE THE BALLS TO SIT THERE ADN TELL ME “WE DONT WANT U TO FEEL OVERWHELMED :(” BUT DONT ACTUALLY DO ANYTHING TO HELP ME!!!!!!! i honestly want the store to burn down like please please please manifesting very evil energies towards my target rn please please die die die

[horansqueen]

AM Conversations : chapter 48

A Niall Horan fanfiction ; rated MA

CHAPTER 1 || CHAPTER 2 || CHAPTER 3 || CHAPTER 4 || CHAPTER 5 || CHAPTER 6 || CHAPTER 7 || CHAPTER 8 || CHAPTER 9 || CHAPTER 10 || CHAPTER 11 || CHAPTER 12 || CHAPTER 13 || CHAPTER 14 || CHAPTER 15 || CHAPTER 16 || CHAPTER 17 || CHAPTER 18 || CHAPTER 19 || CHAPTER 20 || CHAPTER 21 || CHAPTER 22 || CHAPTER 23 || CHAPTER 24 || CHAPTER 25 || CHAPTER 26 || CHAPTER 27 || CHAPTER 28 || CHAPTER 29 || CHAPTER 30 || CHAPTER 31 || CHAPTER 32 || CHAPTER 33 || CHAPTER 34 || CHAPTER 35 || CHAPTER 36 || CHAPTER 37 || CHAPTER 38 || CHAPTER 39 || CHAPTER 40 || CHAPTER 41 || CHAPTER 42 || CHAPTER 43 || CHAPTER 44 || CHAPTER 45 || CHAPTER 46 || CHAPTER 47

NOTES:

-one chapter is her pov, the next is his. -4.2k -im sorry, i never proofread, i hate it. -there WILL be smut. but not only smut. -this is a romance, comedy, smut story. -for the summary, check my MASTERLIST.

- if you want to be notified when this is updated, please message me or leave a comment!

- note for this chapter: i know my last chapter didnt get many notes but the chapter is ready so why not post it you know? sex is vanilla again. thought it was cute. sue me lol. theyll have kinker sex dont worry hahaha! i would LOVE to know what you think of the characters and their reactions and stuff. so please, message me!

here are the requests for this chapter! for the instagram one, i changed it a bit because i dont think her character would want to be in the spotlight like that i hope its ok! also i had already talked about their first time and such so I added the others :)

Chapter 48 : His chapter

NIALL

"Oh my god! Look at you flirting with that woman like she's not 30 years older than you!"

I started laughing and let my head fall back slightly. My arm was on the couch's back right behind her head and I brought it closer, pulling her to me by her neck.

"Is that the tone you use when you're jealous?"

I noticed her nose raise up in a grimace but she kept staring at the tv, making me laugh even more. For some reason, Olivia wanted us to watch old One Direction interviews, pretending it would help me for the ones I had planned in the next few weeks. It didn't really help, all it did was make us laugh and I had to admit it was quite entertaining and I was pretty sure I had never watched most of them.

"It was tough watching interviews back then." she admitted, raising a shoulder. "Especially the older ones. You were such a horny kid."

I frowned slightly at her comment. I could hear a lot of pain but also a bit of blame and it bothered me. I was young, I was newly famous and not shy at all. Of course, I was a bit stupid and I tried to be funny but out of all the people in the world, I thought she'd be the last one to comment on it.

"I just enjoyed flirting." I let out, shrugging too. "I don't do that anymore."

It took her a few seconds but she turned my way, staring at my profile.

"How many times did it work?"

I frowned, still looking the old 60 minutes interview we did a few years ago playing on screen. Did I really want to have this discussion?

"What are you asking?"

I held my breath and turned to her, noticing how painful it was for her to ask me something like that. I felt my annoyance falter a bit but not leave completely.

"How many girls did you have sex with?"

We had never talked about that before. I thought about asking, especially when we started dating, but I was scared it would start shit between us. When I was younger, I didn't mention my stories mostly because I didn't want to hear hers. Now that I think about it, it was probably out of jealousy, too.

"Liv, please-"

"More than 10?"

I stared at her a few seconds and nodded a bit. I watched her lick her lips and breathe in and nervously, I felt my fingers play with the fabric of the couch. I hated this, it could only turn wrong.

"More than 20?"

I could feel myself getting angry and I closed my eyes, trying to calm down. I didn't know why I was so touchy, it was not in my nature, but perhaps the way she asked me didn't help. It was not just a casual conversation, there was clearly a reason why she asked and I suddenly regretted that we never talked about these things before.

"20 sounds about right." I just said, impatient to talk about something else.

"That's more than twice my number."

We remained silent for a few seconds and I raised my eyebrows at her.

"Am I supposed to answer something to that?" I just wondered a bit rudly. "I don't know what you expected Olivia, but clearly you're delusional. I've had a lot of opportunities it's true, and no of course I didn't jump on all of them, but you don't ask an 18 year old boy to be reasonable after being thrown into fame. I don't think you can really understand what it's like."

I shook my head and sighed louder than needed before getting up a bit roughly. I felt her fingers wrap about my wrist and stopped immediately.

"I'm sorry."

I stayed motionless, standing up with my eyes closed as her fingers pressed around my wrist more.

"I'm just scared. And insecure." she added low as i felt her fingers slip and free my hand. "I don't understand why you're dating me, Niall. You could date so many girls or just fool around with anyone you want. But you're here with me and it just makes no fucking sense to me. So when I see how things used to be for you, it scares me for the future and at the same time, it reminds me how much I cried during those years."

I sighed and slowly sat back down next to her, still not being able to look at her.

"Why did you propose we watch that then?"

From the corner of my eyes, I noticed her looking down and swallowing. I couldn't pretend I knew how she felt, not now and not back then, but I was dating her now, I had been dating her for over 9 months. The fact that she was still doubting me... doubting us, was tough to accept.

"I thought i'd be okay, I thought since you were next to me, holding my hand, that it wouldn't bother me." she explained in a low and ashamed tone. "I was wrong."

I sighed again and rubbed my eyes before getting up again. Her head shot up quickly but I just held my hand out to her. It took her a few seconds but slowly, she slid her palm against mine and I pulled on her hand, helping her get up.

"Let's go outside, okay?"

She didn't say anything, she just let me bring her outside, in the backyard. I took my socks off after letting go of her hands and sat on the side of the pool, putting my feet in the water and waited for her. It took her a few minutes but I still didn't turn to her. The night was calm and warm enough, especially for late september, and I looked down at her feet moving slowly in the water.

"At the lodge, I saw you and Harry making out naked on the side of the pool. It made me very jealous, even if I didn't really realize it back then. Not really because you two were having sex, but mostly because he had your full attention, and I was so used to have it all for myself that losing it was like a slap in the face." I admitted, licking my lips. "I'm not saying I know how you feel, Liv, or how you used to feel. I just think that holding on to that is changing you and stressing you for no reason."

"Maybe."

She didn't comment on the part about Harry and I closed my eyes.

"The first date I ever went on was with a girl from school." I added low.

"Grace, I remember."

"The whole time, all I could think about was kissing her. I didn't care about anything else. I was young, I can't even remember if I liked her, but I wanted my real first kiss and it's all that mattered." I made a pause and sighed. "Then I had girlfriends when I was a bit older, and then I joined One Direction and met other girls. And whenever I hung out with them, I was never jealous, I thought 'hey if it doesn't work then it wasn't meant to be' and that's it. I didn't expect it to last because I didn't want it to last. I had nothing to lose. I thought about sex and having fun."

I turned to her and sighed louder when I noticed tears falling down her cheeks. I moved my body her way slightly and shook my head.

"Olivia, why are you crying? I'm trying to tell you that it's different with you. I care about you. And the first thing I thought of when it came to you was not sex, it was not kissing you. It was making you happy, it was how good I felt around you. Why would you cry for that?"

"Because you seem to forget that I was there, Niall. I saw you with these girls. I cried myself to sleep because I desperately wanted to be in their shoes. My first kiss was with a guy at school who was harassing me to go out with him and when he kissed me, all I thought about was you. The first time I had sex with Rian I wished it was you. Every single decision in my love life seems to have been related to you. I'm not blaming you, it's all on me, but its still not easy for me."

My eyes roamed on her face and I watched her wipe her tears and sniff a few times before clearing her throat.

"We both need to make efforts. You can't spend all your time asking questions about my past that's gonna hurt you, you know."

"I'll work on that." she whispered. "But you're gonna have to be patient with me."

"Okay."

We remained quiet again for a while, just looking at the lights of the pool shining on the water. I knew I should reach for her hand but I wasn't sure I wanted to.

"Remember the first time we got drunk together?" she asked with a chuckle, moving her feet a bit more vigorously and making the water move around her. "You were so cute, and so damn tactile. At some point I was so close to tell you that I loved you that I got scared and hid in the bathroom for half an hour."

I smiled at the memory and chuckled.

"You were so dramatic and I didn't even know!" I let out, making her laugh too. "I don't know how you kept it inside for so long."

"Fear of losing you." she shrugged. "I just looked at you, both of us totally pissed, and I thought 'everyone wants a piece of him but he's with you right now, don't ruin this Olivia'."

"You were cute, you had that really high ponytail. I remember because whenever you'd turn around, your hair would brush against my arm and I was so drunk it made me shiver every time."

My eyes found hers and she was not smiling anymore. Her lips were parted and her eyes were glued to me. I raised my eyebrows and moved my face closer to hers.

"Yes, I remember things. Not the same things you remember, and maybe not for the same reasons, but I do remember things."

Slowly, she pressed her lips together and they curled as she kept looking at me.

"I love you, Niall."

I moved my upper body over hers, forcing her to move down on the hard cement but she didn't complain. I placed both my hands on each side of her chest to hold myself over her and bent down to kiss her.

"I love you too." i answered, moving up to a bit to look at her.

Her eyes traveled on my face until my lips and she licked hers.

"You said you'd make love to me whenever I'd want." she whispered so low i barely heard. "I really want it now."

"It's not really comfortable." I pointed out, the right corner of my lips moving up.

"Then you're gonna have to be extra gentle with me."

I nodded and sat up, immediately reaching for the hem of her sweatpants and she moved her butt up to help me. She brought her feet off the water and placed them on the ground, her knees up, and my eyes roamed between her legs as I let out a low groan. I took my shirt off and didn't even react when it fell in the pool. It made Olivia chuckle and I just moved gently over her, placing myself between her legs.

One of her hands ran on my chest as I pressed myself against her. I felt her grind up slowly against me and bent down to kiss her. I could feel myself get harder with every move of her hips, even if she was barely moving and I let my lips brush on her jaw and down her neck.

"You should keep your shirt on, I don't want your back all scratched."

I brought my mouth back on hers and I noticed her lips curling in a fond but amused smile.

"You don't want to see me completely naked?"

"Don't be silly." I chuckled again, glancing down and noticing her hard nipples through the fabric of her shirt. "I really fucking do. But you don't need to be naked to turn me on."

She smiled more and I moved down on my elbows, moving her head up gently and placing my hands under it to make sure her head wouldn't rub against the cement.

"Are you sure you want to try it here?"

She didn't say anything, she just kept looking at me as her hands moved between us. One of her palms pressed on my cock and I groaned low. She started nibbling on her bottom lip, slowly pulling my pants down and I pushed myself into her. I was surprised at how wet she already was and how easy it was for us to do this, like our bodies just seemed to fit perfectly together.

"I love you."

I bent down again, kissing her as I started thrusting in and out of her so slowly that I could feel everything incredibly well. So well that it brought sensations in me that I hadn't felt before. I felt impatient and my whole body throbbed even more than usual. It was definitely different than what I was used to but I loved it. I could really see all of her facial expressions and ended up letting out a very low curse word when her lips parted and her eyes fluttered close. I watched her as she moved her chin up and I could feel the back of her head rubbing slowly against the palm of my hands, making a mess of her hair. She looked amazing, all fucked beneath me, and it made me realize how much I loved her.

"I love you too." I whispered back. "So much."

"Just me?"

My movements faltered and her eyes opened slowly. I stared at my best friend, laying under me, and I thought of all the things we went through together and all the things we'll go through together too. I thought about our friendship that turned into love, I thought about us when we were young, I thought about everything I missed with her and everything I lived with her, and I could swear I felt my heart skip a beat.

"Yes, only you."

Her hands traveled on my back until my ass and she let out a short whimper as her thighs pressed on my side to keep me close. I could feel my elbows and the back of my hands hurt from rubbing slightly on the cement but it was really the sharp pain in one of my knees that made it worse. I tried to push it out of my thoughts to focus on her and when she arched her back and started shaking, I knew she was cumming.

"Oh god Niall... I.. I'm..."

I tried to keep my movements slow and steady but it was pure torture until I felt an orgasm reach me. I felt it coming and held my breath as my eyes closed and I groaned again as it spread inside me slower than normally. I could feel it until the tip of my fingers and in my toes and when I came down from my high, I blinked a few times.

"I'm literally seeing spots." I let out with a short laugh.

"Me too." she chuckled just as my sight was getting clear again.

I looked at her laying under me and sighed. Now that it was over, I was more aware of the pain and I grimaced. I let myself roll on my back next to her and she moved her upper body over me with a frown.

"You okay? You're not bleeding are you?"

I brought my hands up to look at them and shook my head.

"I'm sorry." she added, raising her nose up. "We should have tried on the grass. Do you need ice or something?"

"And pizza." I pointed out with an exaggerated pain expression, making her laugh.

"Alright i'll bring all that in the living room."

She was about to get up but I put my hand on her thigh to stop her, my fingers brushing gently on her skin.

"Wait." She stopped and turned to me. "These girls, they mean nothing. You need to trust me."

She sent me a sad smile and shrugged a shoulder very slowly. I was tired to fight and I was scared it would ruin things between us.

"I'll try."

                                                         ---

I was driving the first time I heard 'This Town' on the radio and she was sitting next to me. I didn't know why but I felt incredibly lucky that I was not alone, and even luckier that she was the one with me. Her face illuminated and she let out a short scream, making me smile even more. I parked on the side of the road and she threw herself in my arms awkwardly since we both still had our seat belts on and we looked at each other the whole time it played until the very end.

"This is so fucking good Niall i'm so proud of you!"

I cupped her face and brought her closer a bit roughly, crashing my mouth against her and making her laugh. She grabbed the front of my shirt and deepened the kiss slightly, making me smile through it.

"Fucking hell."

She laughed as we pulled away slightly and smiled more.

"It's a big deal. Your first solo song." she whispered. "And you worked hard for that."

We remained in the car for a while, just flabbergasted by what had happened and a bit ecstatic. I looked at her reacting almost as intensely as me and it made me realize so many things that I just leaned against my seat and sighed. Despite all the fights we had, despite my almost total absence in the past few weeks, despite the fact that we had it hard recently, she was there, she supported me, and she was happy for me.

"A few drinks tonight to celebrate, how's that?" she proposed as I started the car again. "We could invite a few friends?"

"Yea, yea good call!" I let out, glancing at her. "Hey take my phone and go on instagram!"

She frowned a bit but she was still smiling and she did what I was told before looking at me again.

"You want to add something to your story?"she asked as I nodded. "Okay, go ahead!"

"Hello lovers, so we just heard 'This Town' for the first time on the radio a few minutes ago and we went completely crazy!" I just said with a laugh, trying to focus on the road as I passed one of my hands in my hair and shook my head. "Let me just get back home and I'll do a live and answer a few questions!"

She stopped filming and played with my phone for a few seconds before looking at me again.

"That's a very good idea."

With a smile plastered on my face, I parked the car and unlocked the front door before quickly getting my laptop. She put her purse on the couch and I sat next to it right before she disappeared in the kitchen. It took me a few minutes to go live but when I finally was, my smile hadn't faltered not even for a second. I started answering questions, glancing from time to time at Olivia that remained away from the camera. I knew she didn't like to be in the spotlight and that a lot of times, I brought attention to her without meaning to, but the fact that she was still there, in the shadows, to support me, meant the world.

"I was with Liv, it's her you heard on the video." I explained, answering an other question.

I saw my girlfriend grimace when she realized everyone had heard her voice and her probably her laughter when we recorded the small video in the car and my eyes found her again, her expression making me chuckle.

"From the face she's making now, it was clearly not intentional." I pointed out, laughing again.

My eyes caught a comment that made me frown but I tried to ignore it until I saw an other one and I finally closed my eyes, breathing in.

"Okay, i'm normally not the type to give attention to bad mouthing but we're trying to have a nice time and reading shit about my girlfriend is no fun."

I could feel Olivia tense near me as my eyes roamed on the comments.

'No Niall pls stay!!!'

'Ignore them we love her! OTP!'

'Fuck whoever talks shit about her'

'They don't deserve your attention!'

I didn't add anything else but kept on answering questions about an upcoming album, more songs, the process of writing and tour. After over half an hour, I said goodbye and turned my computer off. Olivia had left and I joined her in the kitchen, wrapping my arms around her waist from behind. My lips reached her neck and I squeezed her tighter against me.

"Hey, darling." I whispered. I heard her sniff and my heart twitched. "It wasn't that mean. I promise."

I watched her fingers grip the side of the sink more and suddenly felt extremely bad. I shouldn't have commented, that way, she wouldn't know about the mean comments, but when I saw them, I didn't think, I just reacted. It was not like me but reading shit about her made me a bit impulsive and now I regretted it.

"That's what I mean when I say I don't understand why you're dating me." she murmured after swallowing hard. "No one understands why you're dating me."

"People who know nothing about you or our story don't get it, so what?" I just replied, nuzzling her nape. "Fuck them. I know why i'm dating you and i've got a shitton of good reasons."

"Don't tell me you don't doubt us, sometimes, Niall." she shook her head. "Don't tell me it never crosses you mind that you should be dating someone who's in your league. A tall, skinny, gorgeous actress, model, singer... I don't know."

She moved away from me and turned around, her back still facing me. I let my arms fall on each side of my body and sighed a bit loud before rubbing my eyes. I was trying to comfort her but it seemed like nothing i'd do would change anything.

"I'm telling you it's you, okay? I love you!" I argued, getting annoyed again. "I don't get how it's so hard to understand!"

She finally turned to me slowly and I felt a pain at heart when I saw the tears on her red cheeks. I didn't know why it was affecting her that much and I felt like i'd never understand.

"Love is not everything. Contrary to popular belief, love is not all you need." she pointed out, her arms crossed on her chest. She shook her head again and licked her lips as I stayed still, holding my breath. "I don't get why you don't understand how I feel, and I can't seem to explain it. It's useless, Niall. I'm useless."

Without waiting for an answer, she turned around and walked in the hall. I closed my eyes, trying to calm the beating of my heart. I should have ran to her and took her in my arms. I should have tried again to tell her how much she meant to me. I should have begged her to believe me and trust me. Instead, I sat on a chair and sighed loud. I felt defeated and exhausted at the same time. I just wanted us to be happy like we used to be but I didn't know how.

After a good twenty minutes of thinking, I got up and walked to our room, opening the door slowly. She was laying in bed, on her side with her knees up. I took a few steps closer only to realize she was asleep. I put my hands deep in my pockets and stared at her for a few seconds. Her lips were slightly parted and I could hear her breathe a bit louder than usual. I sighed again and found a blanket before putting it over her and bending down.

"You're so much more than you seem to believe." I murmured close to her ear. "I wish I knew how to show you. Maybe i'm the useless one."