#this is so dumb

[kittenscookie]

I have been mentally building upon this idea for weeks. The sister has a name now—Ophelia, it means aid/help. ANYWAY

As I was building upon this idea I realized/remembered something—out of 108 people not a damn one of them could string and fire this thing. And Odysseus doesn't count because

1. It was his bow

2. He was quite literally built different. Hell, in the context of this crossover he tortured a God and then had that God's child. Again, BUILT DIFFERENT.

This fact just so happens to slip their minds as they were on a bit of a time limit. But then it dawned on Annabeth, she brings it up, and everyone gets real quiet. Panic begins setting in as everyone tries—and fails—to string this damn thing. Leo? No. Clarisse? Nada. Thalia? Nope. Nico? They looked at him, he looked at them and shook his head, "Be serious right now". The only ones that can even get this damn thing to bend are Annabeth and Will.

After about five minutes of struggle Percy finally manages to string the damn thing. Ten seconds of hope but there's one problem—try as he might Percy can't pull the bow back. Panic once again takes hold as everyone has some version of the thought—"Oh shit, so this is how it happens? This is how we die?" There's the sound of screeching car tires, everyone turns in the direction of it. Ophelia frantically trips out of a BMW. Eyes wild as she rips the bow out of Percy's hands notches the arrow, aims, and fires. It doesn't even sound like a bow—it sounds like a gun just went off.

She's gotta shoot the thing twice more before whatever the hell they needed to kill goes down. She falls to the ground stumbling apologies, just

"I'm so sorry, I'm so damn sorry! I thought they'd send Apollo or Artemis or—SHIT! I thought surely they won't be stupid enough to think one of you could string the bow let alone—"

Ophelia stops, pauses and looks down at the bow in her hands. She stares at it for a good fifteen seconds before slowly looking back at the group, "...Who did this...?" They all turn to Percy, he slowly raises a hand, the woman blinks. "How...?"

"What do you mean?"

"Percy...Percy our father can't string this bow. Zeus, can't string this bow. Ares can't string this bow! The only GODS that can use this thing are Apollo, Artemis, and Athena! Fuck! It took me years to manage to use this thing, and your telling me you manage to string it today?"

"...Yeah"

"How?"

He blinks and shrugs, "Mmhmm!"

Silence for like five seconds before she just nods, "Screw it, I'll question this later when my fingers stop bleeding. Sooooo..." She points to the car, "You guys wanna get ice cream?"

And so they get ice cream

Dear god Epic is slowly pulling me back into Percy Jackson so it's time for a mini crossover idea. (If I get some details wrong please forgive me, it's been a hot minute and I've got the memory of a walnut). Okay, let's say they've gotta get Odysseus's Bow for whatever reason. As the group's contemplating how they're gonna find this thing the gods all just slowly turn to Poseidon.

Poseidon: ...

Athena: You gonna give them her address or should I?

Poseidon: *Groans as he pulls out a pen and post-it note* Okay boys, you're gonna go to this address in Ithaca, knock on the door, ask for [Insert Name Here]. If she's not there go to this address in New Jersey.

Tyson: Who is she?

Poseidon: Your older sister

Percy: We have a sister? Why didn't you ever tell us about her?

Poseidon: ...

Athena: 🤨

Poseidon: .....Go visit your sister

So they do their adventure, escape a couple rough situations, slay a couple monsters. They eventually get to the address, knock on the door, and a young(in terms of appearance) woman with the bluest eyes known to man opens it. She's all smiles, offers them some snacks while she gets the bow.

Nico: Okay, just wondering, why do you have this thing?

Sister: ???

Sister: It's my dad's...Why wouldn't I have it???

Tyson: Huh?

Sister: Odysseus is my other dad

Silence for about a good fifteen seconds before a sly smirk spreads across her face.

Sister: You want the tea?

Percy: Hell yeah!

She pulls out her phone, sends someone a text and not even five minutes later Athena is bursting through the door.

Annabeth: Mom?

Athena: Hi honey. *Points to [Insert Name Here]* You, put the kettle on. *Points to the group* The rest of you, sit down and listen up because I'm still pissed about this shit.

Over the course of the next hour and a half she tells them the juiciest tea they've ever heard. By the end of it they're not surprised that shit never got written down because why would Poseidon and Zeus ever allow future generations know they were fighting that hard—caused a whole second war—for a damn mortal.

[randommmthoughts]

Lily: Hey James, very weird question but do you maybe happen to have pads on you? James: Uhhh, I don't know why you say it like that but yeah, in the dorm? Lily: You're a lifesaver! James returns with Sirius on his side: Here's Padfoot, lils Lily: ... Lily: Pads, James. Sanitary pads. For my period

[ifr1t]

GO, KURT, GO!!!

original tt under the cut

[knifecat111]

[foolsocracy]

lyla kill these idiots

[highcorellianwhiskeyart]

I can't get this image out of my head after reading Book of Bill.

[spikeplate]

sorry i was thinking about love death + rollerskates again

[forumtrashbin]

its them

[ricky-mortis]

Ted’s TED talk

[mxmarsbars]

pride month is temporary clock duo is forever

here’s the goofy ref ^_^

[quazumi]

Victor is very supportive and loves his wife 🫶

[moonlightflower-queen]

The rulers of the underworld have an important message about mental health

[bluejey]

nice

[cheercake]

I watched murder drones

[nicelytousled]

devils minion during a power cut like

[potato-arts]

WHY DID I MAKE THIS

WHY DID I MAKE THIS

Anyways, anyone else remember vine? No? Only me? Okay, well I'll just head back to the old folks home. In the meantime, enjoy this stupid animatic I spent 2 hours on.