#the only thing we know for sure is that its NOT in gluttony

[thatsatricky1]

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭’𝐬 𝐮𝐩 𝐁𝐮𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐩? | l.hc

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: Haechan the sin of Gluttony x (f) Reader

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: swearing, mentions of mental health, taunting, stalking, obsession

𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: Thriller, angst, no happy ending, open ending

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 3,2k

𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐩𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐝: The Orange Envelope

The Orange card looked enticing, a single flower tapped to the front of it as if a promise of what could lay inside considering it was thick, more flowers most likely waiting to be revealed. Even the waxed seal promised more and more, slightly overflowing from where it had been pressed too much wax having been used. And who were you to deny picking something with just that more involved inside.

Y/n didn’t have to think much on her choice, she’d pick the orange one first. Sure the white letter beforehand had stated to only pick one, but what was stopping her from reading all of them? If it was just some prank she’d be able to piece together everything if she read all of them, but for now she’d just pick the orange one first.

Reaching past the rest of the letters to grab onto the orange one at the top right of her table, she pulled it towards herself noticing the weight of it. Pulling the dried flower off the letter and placing it on her table for later.

Moving to grab onto the wax seal and flipping it up ignoring the tear she heard as she did so, her free hand cupping underneath the letter as many dried flowers toppled out of the overflowing envelope. A few sunflower seeds mixed in with it. Once it lessened she moved her filled palm towards the desk, dumping it without looking.

Tugging the letter carefully out of the envelope to avoid more things falling out. Though as she unfolded the letter a few sunflower seeds ended up falling out having been squished between the paper, scattering below her feet against the ground. A clean up job she wasn’t too thrilled about doing later on.

What’s up Buttercup,

Not surprised you picked my letter, it was the best one after all. Don’t even deny it, you picked it after all. Then again knowing me and you well enough after reading this you’ll want to open up the others too, but that’s a big no no. You see when we said pick one, we meant it. You made your choice, the best one of course mind you, so just sit there all snug and let fate take its course. Fuck I’ve been waiting for this, I don’t like waiting at all. I usually just take what I want, but in this case you decided it anyway, so wait right there, I’m coming.

Your Sunshine

Closing the letter, she didn’t bother putting it back into the envelope, halfway through the letter she’d looked at her desk, the letters from before were no longer there. She wasn’t stupid, this wasn’t just some sort of prank. And she knew exactly who’s letter it was. The messy handwriting, the wording and the nickname he’d given himself. It was obvious and even if it was anonymous she knew he’d left those obvious clues for her to know it was him. He’d done it on purpose as if out of rushed excitement or to get a reaction out of her, most likely both.

Getting up from her seat she ignored the way the sunflower seeds dug into the soles of her sock covered feet, the ones that laid on her floor from opening the letter just moments ago. Instead she went straight for her bedroom door rushing her way to her front door, back door and open windows. Any sort of access point she had in her home she made sure to lock and secure shut.

Taking a few relaxing breaths she closed her eyes trying to calm herself down, this wasn’t a natural occurrence, but she’d be damned to let this all take place. Not in her home, not in her life. Once she’d busted her ass off to have, she made her own decisions in life, not others.

Though her eyes open slowly when her ears pick up on movement upstairs, before she could look upwards she felt the familiar feeling of her cat drag itself against her leg. Looking down instead of up she noted her cat's hair standing up on edge, as if put off by something, but she couldn’t blame her cat, because goosebumps raised against her own skin.

If her cat was downstairs, that meant something else was making noise upstairs.

Of course she should have noticed, he wasn’t someone who would wait idly for her reaction, or her pick. He always rushed into things, Haechan always took the things he wanted.

In her rush she hadn’t taken a second to truly look around when she’d been closing and locking all possible entry points. So when she turned to stare at the front door, the sneakers at her door proved to mock her. Laying there, one sitting upright and the other tilted on its side. Y/n had overlooked it when locking the front door.

Moving to look at the shoe rack she noticed one pair of slippers for indoors was also gone, most likely being worn at this very moment upstairs in her own home. It seemed Haechan had invited himself in, then again he did have a copy of her house key. An emergency key she’d trusted him with, for days she needed to feed her cat but couldn’t and he happened to live close enough by to be able to do it for her.

Maybe she should have taken it as a sign of how her cat had never warmed up to him, her hair always standing up when she spotted the guy. Even when Haechan would be all smiles she’d hiss or swipe at him if he got too close for comfort. Her cat wasn’t really a people person besides herself but she never acted that defensive with others.

Y/n had always dismissed it as her kitten disliking Haechan’s personality and way too energetic vibe. Her cat was one who preferred a calm vibe in her home, loving when Y/n would sit in the living room watching a series where she could plop herself down between her owners legs and take a well deserved nap.

“Stay.” Y/n whisper crouching down to settle her cat's spiked fur, not sure if she was doing it more so to comfort her pet or for her own self. Whatever the meaning behind her actions she was quick to get back up attention going back up to the ceiling.

Her eyes following the creaking of the floorboards upstairs, it was slow and deliberate. She knew he was trying to grab her attention, trying to get her upstairs. The smart thing was to grab her cat and flee, but she wasn’t going to let who she thought previously was a good friend walz into her home and claim it as his own.

The idea itself was stupid, considering what had just happened, letters disappearing into thin air was not in any sense normal, and other things were sure to follow. But she could just stand there and watch him toy with her. No matter what he was ‘capable’ of. Y/n had always made sure to stay out of trouble, but if trouble decided to knock at her own door or in this case worm its way in, she’d deal with it herself.

His letter had stated clearly what he wanted, he wanted her. If she was honest with herself she’d never taken Haechan’s flirty remarks and actions seriously, having brushed off the attempts each and every time it happened. She’d assumed he knew she wasn’t interested in a relationship considering the big fact of her stating so when they’d first become friends through university.

Y/n had sworn off dating until she’d complete her degree, having to focus properly on it. That didn’t mean she didn’t seek pleasure out of one night stands and such. She was still a woman with needs that she’d meet every now and then. But a romantic and very involved relationship was not something she wanted any time soon. Flings and casual relationships were enough to get her by for now.

She thought back to anything she may have done to give him the impression she wanted to start things with him. Sure, he was attractive and someone she could see being together with when she wasn’t focused on her studies, not anymore though with the uneasy situation he’d pushed her into recently.

They’d kissed a few times, but not anything serious. Usually happening with drunk actions after a night out or during it. A lot of university students with a little influence of alcohol and being close enough friendship wise had kissed. Or at least that was the dynamic she’d taken to with her circle of friends. It was a drunk and platonic action.

So she knew she hadn’t given haechan hints or advances to think she wanted to start anything with him. Haechan was someone who took what he wanted most of the time, not knowing when he crossed boundaries. Usually it was much more casual things, like snagging the last bite of someone’s food, drinking other people's drinks before they can, deciding group projects without asking others what they thought, and many other things along those lines.

He was used to taking things, but he was in for a rude awkwakening and reality check because Y/n no matter what sort of fucked up person he rally was would not give in. She made her own choices, not ones she’s pushed towards or dragged into.

Y/n moved to place her cat inside the bathroom, closing the door not wanting her cat to somehow get caught in the crossfire. She didn’t doubt her kitten would have a lot to say to haechan since right from the start she hadn’t been a fan of him in the slightest, she wished she’d taken that into account when befriending haechan.

Glancing above at the ceiling she noticed the creaking had stopped a while ago, the last noise had been where her bedroom laid. Rolling her shoulders back taking a deep breath in, shoulders detensing as she exhaled slowly. Not giving it another thought as she moved towards her staircase.

Y/n knew he wanted her to come to him, that was the goal for him. That instead of having to drag you to him, you’d walk right into his arms. Selfishly expecting so. Y/n would give him the pleasure of her going to him, but would not give in and instead face him head on. Make sure he knew that not everything in life could be his. Not with the approach he used.

Actions have consequences and she was ready to prove that to him, however what she didn’t realise was her own actions were inherently greedy in itself, every action has consequences including her very own ones.

She took her time climbing up the stairs, not being quiet like she had been on the way downstairs earlier. Y/n wanted him to notice she was coming for him. In the hallway, she held back a noise at seeing just how taunting he was being, how obvious he was.

He’d left her bedroom door wide open, the lights inside her room flooding out into the hallway. And now that she was closer she could hear something. A sort of crunching noise every few seconds sounding out. Only getting louder as she moved towards her bedroom.

Most would hesitate at this point, stall before the doorway however Y/n didn’t stop, she rounded the doorway stepping inside. Eyes making contact with him straight away. It was Haechan just like she’d expected it to be.

There he was, leaning half against her study desk, fingers wrapped around the edges. He was looking downwards while pressing his shoes against the floorboards causing a crunch to follow every time he did it. The sunflower seeds that had been scattered on the floor below her desk were the cause of the sound as they were grinded against the floor with his boots.

“Get out of my house.” No greeting given to what was about to be an ex friend.

Haechan let out a chuckle barely lifting his head, but his eyes flicked upwards half hidden from his fringe to get a look in front of him, taking in her appearance with clear delight glinting across them.

“What, not happy to see me Buttercup?”

“Whatever idea you’ve somehow got stuck in your head, it’s not happening Haechan.” She straight up refused, causing that grin of his to slip off his face.

In her whole time of knowing him, he always had some sort of smile or grin on his face, so to see the sudden serious look cross over his facial feature made her stomach churn uncomfortable.

“Well that’s not very kind of you considering the fact you picked me.” He replied, no amusement in his voice however.

Moving to stand up from where he’d been leaning against the desk talking a step in her direction, more sunflower seeds crunching under his boots. If this was any other day she’d be scolding him for wearing shoes inside her house. But with the way he was looking at her, instead she took a step backwards, now back to being in between her doorway of the bedroom.

“You know I meant what I said in my letter, right?” He questioned out, taking another step closer, inching towards her.

“That you take things without asking?” She retorted trying to at least not let him have the last word, knowing fully well he was not finished talking.

“Well I can’t argue with that since I do take anything I want. Just like right now, with you.” He shrugged as if what he was implying was normal, a simple and mundane action.

“How’d you do it? The letters.” Y/n couldn’t help but ask, wanting to know how he could possibly do something like that. It wasn’t natural, nor physically possible.

He grinned, looking proud of himself before flicking his wrist, all the envelopes between his fingers, appearing out of thin air. Including his own orange one. He moved to fan his face with them.

“You mean like this, don’t look so put off, this is only just a little party trick compared to what I can do.” He teased, taunting her. But she could also detect the hint of a threat somewhere in between the lines as if to tell her he could do much worse especially if she didn’t start acting how he wanted.

“Haechan, whatever you want. It’s not happening.” She once again refused, causing him to hum, tongue poking the inside of his cheek at her clear defiance even after seeing something that shouldn’t be physically possible for a person to do.

“You know, even now with you denying what will happen, you look hot making that face.” Haechan played around, she knew now it wasn’t some harmless playful flirting though, he meant it.

As he took another step closer her hand went to the door handle, his eyes flickering at her actions, grin widening. He wasn’t trying to be sneaky about closing in on her, and she wasn’t hiding her own actions either. It was going to be a fun night.

“You could make this easy on both of us and just come here, or you can try running.” He offered out the two options secretly hoping for a chance, it was always fun that way. His plans for when he caught her was different to his normal brutal and violent ways with others though.

“Fuck you.” Her words did not catch him by surprise as she swung the bedroom door shut in his face, since he’d been walking towards the door at that stage not taking slow steps any longer.

Turning on the spot she moved to get to her staircase, about to go back down the stairs. Her bedroom door flew open, smashing against the wall, leaving a dent that would not allow her to get the deposit back if she decided to move out. Haechan casually walked out with his hands in his pockets, seeing the flash of her hair as she rushed down the stairs.

“Careful you might trip.” He called out after her, following close behind but letting her gain a bit of distance.

Y/n ignoring his words, knowing he wanted her to respond back. Giving him a reaction would just be helping him win whatever sick and twisted game he was trying to play.

Getting to the bottom of the steps she glanced in the direction of her bathroom, a pange of guilt going through her knowing her cat was stuck in there. Continuing her way towards the front door, hoping that she’d have enough time to get to that cop, enough time Haechan wouldn’t remember the cat that didn’t like him, enough time he wouldn’t get any sick idea.

She skidded to a stop beside in front of the entrance way, barely managing slamming against the door. Hand moving to try the door handle, cursing when she remembered it was locked. Fingers wrapping around the lock to undo it, only for it to stubbornly refuse to budge.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.” Curses slipped from her lips excessively as she repeatedly tried the lock over and over again but it refused to move.

“Yeah, don’t think that’s going to work babe.” Haechan observed her weak attempt at getting out.

Y/n turning to cast a nasty glare his way, he was manipulating the lock no doubt. Keeping it shut so she couldn’t escape.

“As much as I’d want to chase you around, it’s Halloween. Too many eyes, and also that useless cop in his car.” He pointed out, finally taking his hands out of his pockets.

She took him by surprise when she started walking towards him, but he welcomed it with a smirk thinking he finally got her to just give in. To him it was obvious that what they had between them wasn’t just some innocent friendship or a possible fling.

“So what are you?” She asked out finally face to face with him, barely any space between them.

“You know me by Lee Haechan. Or I guess also Lee Donghyuck. I had a hard time deciding between the two names.” He started moving to lean his face closer as he continued “But I’m more widely known by a few other names. Mammon, a prince of hell, the sin of greed.” Haechan replied in answer, deciding to give her at least that.

Though he was done talking, patience having ran out as he moved his face closer in an attempt to finally know what her lips felt like against his. A stinging pain stopped him, eyes blurring for a few seconds as he tried to process what had just happened. Barely feeling her brush past him.

Blinking away the blurring against his eyes, and slight fuzzy noise ringing in his ears. He felt a warmth run down his temple, all the way down and passed his jaw. Raising a finger to swipe against the area, hand coming in focus in front of his face.

Y/n had hit him something right against the temple. A laugh blurting out past his lips in pure amusement at her actions. Turning his head to look in the direction she’d ran, moving to swipe his tongue along his bottom lip, catching a bit of blood that had splattered there.

“Okay we can play it that way.” He muttered to himself, flicking his gaze briefly downwards notinging the object he’d been hit with was a fucking mini angel statues she’d gotten as a house warming gift from the neighbours a few years ago. The irony not lost on him.

𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭: @rotinyzen @wonyoungmywife @snflwrhaerecs4u @thegreenlynx @serinebsblog @delululi @molensworld @morkiee @marvelahsobx @kaciebello @kgneptun @bluedbliss @haechansbbg @officiallyjaehyuns @bunnychui @audreybub @sleepyvic @winwintea

(This Taglist is used for all my nct context so if you’d like to be tagged in my nct content please comment or write to me to be added)

𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: I was going to add an interaction of haechan with the cat, but im not doing that considering the fact i love cats and animals in general too much. sidenote: due to rushed time this is not proofread and will be edited soon.

𝐒𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐃𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐥𝐲 𝐒𝐢𝐧𝐬 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭:

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𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭:

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[fickleminder]

seven supervillains and one (1) normie

You move in with seven normal, law-abiding housemates.

Here’s my piece for @obeymezine! Leftover sales are live till Dec 15th, so do consider supporting us since all proceeds will be going to charity :)

Lucifer looks even more handsome in person.

You find yourself paying more attention to him and the deep timbre of his voice than the tour of Serenity Manor and its rules. Only a firm call of your name snaps you back to the present.

“This will be your room,” he says, opening one last door for you to step through. It’s decently furnished with all the basic necessities and has an en suite to boot. How generous. “Is this to your satisfaction?”

“Oh absolutely, everything looks great!” You wheel your luggage into a corner and set your backpack down on the large study table. “I still can’t believe I got matched with you guys for the boarding program. Thank you so much for having me!”

“The pleasure is ours.” Lucifer gives you a polite nod. “Make yourself at home, and I will introduce you to my brothers tomorrow. We hope you’ll enjoy your stay here with us.”

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“Surveillance systems are online,” Levi reports as all eyes watch you unpack on the screen. “Ugh, bugging rooms is so old school. It’s only the first day, I doubt there’ll be any suspicious activity.”

“And it better stay that way.” Satan’s already profiling you from your posters on the walls, your stuffed sheep on the bed, your clothes in the closet. No red flags yet, as far as he can discern.

“Pfft, what can one exchange student do to us?” Mammon scoffs. Your background check was clean, your documents checked out. In every practical sense, you were an ordinary postgraduate taking courses at the local university for a year. “Loosen up guys!”

Lucifer shoots him a glare indicating he has no intention of doing so. “No funny business. It’s unfortunate that we have to go undercover in our own home, but Elysium’s agents are on to us. We need to mask our activities and blend in, and we have no choice but to wait for them to leave. Until then, continue to follow Prince’s orders, but keep things low-key. Do I make myself clear?”

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“—massive destruction of property at Settler’s factory premises. Witnesses say it was Gluttony in another one of his rampages, and this marks the fourth attack in…”

You glance towards a face-palming Lucifer at the breakfast table. “Is everything okay?”

“Yes, perfectly fine.” He smiles through gritted teeth and switches off the TV, silencing the news.

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You have a few days before classes officially start, so you decide to take some time familiarizing yourself with the town. Lucifer has graciously agreed to escort you, along with one of his brothers.

“And that’s about it, really. Is there anywhere else you wanna go?” Belphie asks after they’ve given you a cursory tour. You mention wanting to return to the confectionery shop you passed by a while back, and he smirks. “Sure, but if you’re looking for Settler products, they might not have much stock.”

“That’s alright! They used to be one of my favorite brands you know, but then I found out they engaged in a lot of questionable business practices. It’s a shame really, I liked their stuff.”

Lucifer feels his work phone vibrating in his pocket all of a sudden and curses mentally. What could Barbatos possibly want at this moment? “Apologies, I… have to use the washroom,” he excuses himself in a hurry, discreetly signaling Belphie to cover for him before running off.

Almost half an hour passes with no Lucifer in sight.

“He’s been gone for a while. Should we go and check up on him?” You ask worriedly.

“Nah, it’s fine.” Belphie sniggers. “He usually takes really long shits anyway. Let’s just go. He’ll catch up eventually.”

Lucifer meets you back in the manor at the end of the day, and you miss the dirty look he sends Belphie behind your back after you recommend some home remedies for treating diarrhea.

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“Satan, I need some advice!” The blond follows your voice to the kitchen and freezes when he sees you holding his collection of hunting knives. For gutting people, not cutting meat. “I’m making lunch. Which of these are for fruits and vegetables?”

This is why Lucifer always nags us about picking up our toys, Satan realizes belatedly. Fuck, he probably left them out on the couch or something. At least he’d remembered to clean off the blood first. “Those aren’t for cooking. They’re for, uh, self-defense.” Idiot, is that the best you could come up with? There’s no way it’ll—

“Oh, I’m so sorry! I shouldn’t have assumed.” You gasp and quickly return the knives to him. “One of my old roommates used to sleep with a dagger under their pillow, though I personally prefer to keep a baseball bat next to my bed. Besides, didn’t some rich politician get murdered in his own house just recently? The manor seems secure and you guys have Cerberus, but better safe than sorry I guess.”

Satan is still reeling from your sheer obliviousness, but he knows better than to look a gift horse in the mouth. “I completely agree,” he says with a poker face.

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Mammon’s Lexura is a sight to behold, but you’re more interested in how fast she can go.

“Oi, I know you’re worried about your friend but keep your oily fingers to yourself, you hear?” He grumbles, opening the garage door for you and Beel to enter. “Which mall was it again?”

“The one with Bullseye,” you reply distractedly, furiously tapping away on your phone. “I can’t believe she and her girlfriend got harassed in public. You only read stories about this happening to other people online. What kind of fucked up organization calls themselves a charity and— Shit!”

You trip on something and drop your phone. It bounces and skids under Mammon’s car, but Beel instinctively steps forward before you can even react. With one arm, he tilts the vehicle just enough for you to duck under and retrieve it.

“Wow, thanks so much Beel!” You dust your phone off and check for cracks on the screen while Mammon sweats buckets behind you. “You gotta share your workout routine with me sometime. Hey, do you mind coming along and being our muscle for the day?”

“Okay.” Beel agrees easily, and you pump your fists.

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“—worth millions. The curator declined to comment…”

“This is crazy, I was there just last week!” You exclaim while chewing on your dinner. “The museum had lots of cool stuff on display. Mostly illegally imported, if you catch my drift, but not anymore huh?”

Asmo winks at you. “What a shame. You could have seen Lust in action first-hand.”

“Aren’t heists supposed to be discreet? He is pretty good-looking though, I’ll give him that.”

“Is he prettier than me?” The entire table goes deathly silent as you squint between Asmo’s fluttering eyelashes and the masked supervillain on the TV screen. “Don’t you think he’d look better with a boob window?”

“…Nah, he doesn’t have the tiddies to pull it off.” Your gaze unconsciously flickers to Beel’s chest. “Plus the butts don’t match. Yours is flatter.”

Asmo’s jaw drops in mock outrage. “Honey, have you been checking me out? How very scandalous of you~”

“Enough, please.” Lucifer sighs amidst your spluttering.

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“That’s it. We’re screwed, our cover is blown. I knew this was a bad idea…”

“Let’s just resort to good ol’ fashioned murder and then frame it as a runaway case. No one will ever know!”

“This manor is a fortress located in the safest part of town. What the fuck do you think people will presume there is to run from?”

“There were a couple of close calls, but I think we’re still in the clear.” Beel recalls you quoting your statistics professor after an extended period of time where one of them would come home late the night before a major news event: correlation does not imply causation.

“Need I remind all of you, it was our proposal to join the boarding program as a front. Prince approved it himself, and I won’t allow us to back out now.”

“Shut up, Lucifer. Don’t you have any politicians to assassinate?” Belphie sneers.

“We will see this through.” Lucifer refuses to budge, ever the prideful bastard. “We’re still safe, but keep your guards up. Understood?”

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The kitchen is pitch black this time of night, but Levi’s had years to figure out a way around without alerting anyone he’s back.

“I hate on-site jobs,” he grumbles to himself. “What kind of company doesn’t have remote access to their servers nowadays? Let’s see how they like it when people steal and sell their private data instead, muahahaha— Eek!”

“Hmm? Levi?” You stifle a yawn and shuffle towards the rack of cups. “Why’re you up at this hour?”

Levi is still blinking away the spots in his vision from the sudden onslaught of light when you flipped the switch. He pales as you stare at his costume and equipment on the counter. “Wait, it’s not what it looks like—”

“Late con, huh? Must have been fun. You were still in character there. Heheh.” You pour yourself a glass of water. “Nice cosplay by the way. G’night.”

“G-goodnight!” Levi waits to hear the sound of your door closing before wheezing hysterically in relief.

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You sigh blissfully under the weight of four cats lounging on various parts of your body. “I’ll admit I had my doubts at first, but this is exactly what I needed. Thank you.”

“My pleasure.” Satan takes a long sip of his tea while petting the snoozing tabby on his lap. He looks like one of those criminal masterminds in the movies. “Visiting cat shelters is the best way to unwind after a long week. And don’t worry, I have it on good authority that this one actually takes proper care of our furry friends.”

“That’s reassuring to hear! I’ll never understand why anyone would want to hurt these precious babies.” A little calico wanders near your face and boops your nose with its toe beans. “If only all shelters could be as noble as this one. Remind me to stop by the donation box before we leave!”

“Gladly. Speaking of donations, remember that charity group that messed with your friends? I heard someone stole every last penny from their funds and now they’re on the verge of insolvency. Truly, this is karma at work.”

“Schadenfreude!” You cheer before the two of you clink cups and drink.

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“Hey, you’ve been in there for a while now. Do you need— Oh.”

“Belphie!” You grin at him sheepishly and fidget with your rubber gloves. “I’m sorry, I’m really bad at this. My old dorm had a janitor, so I’ve never been assigned toilet duty before…”

“No wonder. You’d be dead in minutes if you kept this up,” Belphie snaps, quickly moving the unopened bottle of bleach away from you. “Mixing cleaning products is a sure-fire way to poison yourself.”

You wince at his harsh tone, and Belphie’s expression softens in sympathy.

“Here, I’ll teach you.” And then he proceeds to detail exactly what chemicals are in each product, which combinations produce different kinds of fumes with varying levels of toxicity, how to make odorless gasses that can kill a man in seconds—

“Why’d you stop?” You protest when Belphie abruptly cuts himself off. He’s probably feeling embarrassed about oversharing. “This is super informational. I’d be dead without you!”

“…Right.” He blinks, nonplussed. “You’re welcome, or whatever. Just stay away from the bleach, okay?”

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Mammon shuffles the deck with deft hands and explains the rules. “You play as an Elysium agent of your choice, and your goal is to defeat the mob boss terrorizing the city: Jesús Iglesias Ken. The game can be competitive or cooperative depending on which rules we follow, but I say we do competitive mode and bet on the winner!”

“Ugh, shaddup Mammon!” Levi groans while you set up the board and pieces.

“Now, for the characters! We have Kid, a tiny chihuahua of an agent who has lots of good buffs from the sweets he eats. Director, who can move other players during his turn; but don’t get fooled by his smile. He can be super scary sometimes! Spear, man that guy packs a punch. He’s a damage dealer with shitty taste buds.”

Too busy paying attention to Mammon, you don’t see the way Levi makes throat-slitting gestures and mouths SHUT UP SHUT UP STUPIDMAMMON—

“There are also NPCs like Sorcerer, who can help or hinder you depending on your actions, shady bastard. And Aristocrat, who’s on the villain’s side and a total bootlicker, but he gives valuable intel for the right price.”

“How do you know all of this? I don’t see it in the rule book.” You scan the character description section intently. “Don’t tell me… You’re secretly a fan!”

Mammon chokes, finally catching on to Levi’s signals. Both of them exchange wide-eyed looks before forcibly grinning at you. “Yeah, totally, I’m a fan! Hahaha…”

“What a nerd, right?” Levi laughs nervously. “Anyway, this game is more fun with more players, so let’s just play something else for now, okay? Okay.”

.

.

.

“I’ve got reports that Elysium’s agents are finally moving out. We should be cleared to resume normal operations soon.”

“Our plan worked like a charm! Ooh, we’re so close~”

“Good job, everyone.” Lucifer nods with a satisfied smile. “This will all be over shortly. And just in time too. A year’s almost up.”

Everyone falls silent as their thoughts drift to you. It’ll be quiet without you around; you may not have been the sharpest tool in the shed, but you were always kind and genuine with all of them. It goes without saying that they’ll definitely miss you once you’re gone.

“We should stay in touch,” Mammon proposes suddenly, looking none of his brothers in the eye. “Y’know, to keep tabs and make sure we weren’t compromised or anything. See things through to the end and all that.”

For once, nobody objects to Mammon’s idea. “Indeed,” Lucifer murmurs in approval.

.

.

.

“I’ll be on campus studying for my ethics finals. See you all at dinner!”

You set up camp at your favorite corner: a little nook in the section of the library that’s perpetually empty. Just as you make yourself comfortable and open your laptop, someone pings you with an encrypted message.

Grinning to yourself, you easily bypass Levi’s embedded spyware and open up a private channel to take the call. “Barb, it’s so good to hear from you!”

“Good afternoon.” A polished voice greets you from the speakers, and you quickly plug in your headphones to prevent eavesdropping. “Apologies for the disturbance, but I have the data you requested.”

“Thanks Barbatos. You really are the best AI I’ve ever created!”

“I am the only AI you’ve ever created, but the sentiment is acknowledged. Did your side project go well?”

“Always so humble, haha! And yes, it went wonderfully! It’s so good to finally meet the brothers face-to-face. They’re such a lively bunch!”

“I concur. Back to business: the up-and-coming cosmetics company you asked me to look into? It turns out your hunch was right; I’ve found evidence that they rely heavily on animal testing for their products.”

“A job for Belphie then. He’ll know how to put those chemicals to better use.”

“Of course. On a separate note, another political party has been pushing for…”

[elk-scribe]

you know what since I was talking about the rain world ending and i rambled a little about the karma system and how its all fake.

Big spoilers ahead and whatever I will be talking thoroughly abt the game lore (excluding downpour i don't consider it canon).

Karma in rain world isn't real and we've all been tricked to think it matters at all.

Here's a list of things we should consider regarding the information about karma.

We start on the lowest karma, and as slugcat rests it goes up until it caps at 5. Each of these karma levels represent the basic animal urges. Violence, lust, companionship, gluttony, survival.

The ancients are the ones that considered shedding the base natural urges of an animal necessary for ascension.

The ancients are also the ones that proposed the idea of ascension, and declared that the cycle of life, death, and rebirth is so awful that no creature would want to be a part of it.

(light blue pearl, outskirts)

Now, a lot of this game is about religion- and in the case of the ancients it touches upon the idea of the opressiveness of religion and exploitation therein. Anytime I think about how the ancients left behind the iterators to "solve the problem" for the rest of the creatures, it makes me think of how missionaries go to places to try and "save" the people there.

The ancients' religion is a manipulative cult. First, they convince (almost) all of their people that life is awful. Then, they continue with proposing the idea of solving that problem- no longer living. But there's a catch! You have to die correctly. You have to EARN this "blissful" release from the horrible fact of living. Either by rigorous torture (living off of tea and starving yourself) or by paying money.

(Bright red pearl, farm arrays)

Then, they make it a societal norm- an HONOUR to die in the way They Think Is Correct. But you HAVE to do everything they say to shed yourself of those nasty animal urges and be ready for ASCENSION. And they put a price on it.

But we have to remember, not only did they create a religion that convinced them all that living is horrible...

They destroyed the entire ecosystem that used to be there and replaced it with ruins or whatever managed to descend from purposed organisms.

The ancients were able to alter cells of creatures- the ability to do such a thing at all is described here.

(Gold pearl, Chimney Canopy)

So who is to say that they didn't alter the cells of their own people? That they didn't create all purposed organisms with that idea of karma inside of them? The gates respond to the slugcat, it reads something about its karma. Its a machine reading something within its genetic data. The guardians respond to creatures with karma- and in fact are hostile to anything NOT at karma 10.

But the guardians were made by the ancients to protect their temples. To prevent anyone "unworthy" from going down.

The iterators are forbidden from altering their own karma- how is that something you can do if its not an actual, physical trait somewhere within them? Somewhere within their genetic code that the ancients tampered with?

But most notably-

Cheesing your way past the guardians using flashbangs and throwboosts is an intended feature of the game, and you can go down and into the sea and ascend with no issue. If karma truly mattered for ascension, then why can we ascend without the approval of the guardians?

Slugcats are descendants of purposed organisms, they have this "karma" meter wired into their bodies.

So anyway karma isn't real and the ancients forced a mass suicide of their own kind as Im sure whoever benefitted from exploiting their own citizens had been long gone, leaving behind nations of people desperate to leave the world behind as they have been convinced its the only thing to save them from the horrors of living.

[mylevisdontfitanymore]

I can't stop thinking about that one-night-stand stucky fic you wrote where they meet at a bar and bucky is stuffing his fat belly full of food and steve is filling his own fat belly full of alcohol, and i can't stop thinking about them meeting months later and they're just absolutely massive, their guts (and the rest of them) even bigger than the last time they saw each other, and in that time their hobbies have gotten even worse. I imagine that Bucky always needs to be full and heavy and tight and so he carries around snacks and things wherever he goes, and steve always needs to be sloshy and drunk and gravid so he carries around those little aeroplane-sized bottles of alcohol to top him off whenever he feels like he needs a re-up, and i think that if they decided to do more than a one-night-stand the next time they meet and appreciate how badly the two of them have been consumed by their gluttony and their desires, i think they could be so good for each other, bucky always making sure steve has a steady supply of alcohol and beer to make his belly constantly sloshy and his head constantly empty, steve to ensure that bucky has enough food to keep his gut stuffed and full... i don't know, i think you've ruined me, i love it....

One night stand stucky

Oh, yeah, their “hobbies.” I don’t think getting drunk (actually drunk or just food drunk) counts as a hobby but… that’s cute. We can pretend that it counts to indulge them and ourselves. Besides, Lord knows both Bucky and Steve think of their respective bad habit of filling themselves up to the brim as hobbies, hobbies that are so pleasurable and all-consuming that they just can’t stop. Isn’t the point of a hobby for it to be something that you find enjoyable and can spend your leisure time doing? It’s so goddamn hot for both of them, it feels so good to be filled up to the point of heavy, round bellies leaving them beached that they lose track of time. Time flies when you’re having fun. And, oops, exactly like you said, it spirals out into their daily lives. They can’t help themselves! Their hobbies are just so fun, why would they ever want to do anything else? 

Stucky belly kink under the read more. Warnings for alcohol consumption/intox kink, stuffing, semi-public sex acts (but in the feedism way), weight gain, mutual gaining, etc.

So, Steve has miniature bottles of booze with him all the time. Every hour of every day, no matter where he is. Those little bottles that he can easily sip from, covert, or sometimes, he just says fuck it and brings flasks or water bottles to have with him as he goes out and about. There’s only so much those little bottles can do when he’s working with the fat keg that is his distended, hard gut. Sips don’t fill him up, he needs chugs and chugs. Steve doesn’t fucking know what to do with himself if he’s not sloshing and so full that he has to burp, desperately trying to relieve some of that straining pressure, otherwise he might pop. If he isn’t sweating and panting from overfullness, he feels lost, more lost than he does when he’s drunk as shit.

Steve waddles around all day thinking of two things: when can he get more booze than just those airplane bottles and when can he get out of his fucking clothes, they’re so tight and rubbing his stretched itchy skin. He just wants to spread out on his couch in front of the huge TV in his apartment, pounding beers, gut bulging into his lap, weighing heavily down on his thighs, and dropping between his thighs. It’s so big these days with its mass keeping him pinned in place unless it’s an emergency (re: unless he runs out of drinks).

More than airplane bottles, flasks, and water bottles, Steve even considers buying one of those wine bra things, he’s already got quite the rack going, the alcohol going somewhere other than his gut (finally), so it wouldn’t make a huge difference right? Actually, he could probably get away with a camelback, right? His gut makes his spine arch so far forward, dragged by the weight pinned onto his front and barely balanced by his growing ass, that it wouldn’t be that noticeable. He could fill one of those up with alcohol and go to town anywhere anytime, wouldn’t that be the fucking dream? Steve’s chunky, heavy body shivers just thinking about it. 

Meanwhile, Bucky has snacks - snacks on snacks on snacks. At first, when he starts to himself go, first allowing himself to leave the house during the day so packed that he has pit stains and crescent moons under his flabby tits, exhausted by the effort of dragging his belly everywhere with him, so heavy, he’s shameful enough to just slip a few protein and candy bars in his pockets alongside loose change that he knows he’s just going to end up using for vending machines wherever he can find them, exchanging the cold, hard coins for sugary, fatty goodness that will be gone in too few bites. Quickly, he loses his shame, though. It sheds from him in bits and pieces.

He carries snacks in his pockets but as he outgrows his pants, the room in his pockets is hit by his widening hips and thicker thighs - not to even mention his ass, dear god - so he buys himself a purse. Nothing huge. Just a little bag to have “emergency” snacks to tide him over between meals of impressive size. Then, when his little snack-stuffed purse (bulging and heavy just like Bucky himself) isn’t enough, he reverts to his college years, albeit with the weight of an entire ‘nother person on his frame, carrying a backpack with him everywhere. This time around, there are no books, planners, or even a laptop in his bag. He fills his snack backpack moderately at first, but it doesn’t last because, of course, it doesn’t. If Bucky understood moderation, he would’ve ended up perverting the lean, athletic build that he spent so long procuring in high school and college into an excessive, wide, heavy body that’s so plush it’s hard to believe. Bucky wastes hours fresh out of the shower investigating himself as the weight piles on, poking and prodding and pinching his fat, his rolls thick and sliding together hotly, it’s so hard to believe the whale he’s turned himself into. He’s such a needy, big whale that his backpack gets too heavy when he drags it around throughout the day. He huffs and puffs and sweats worse than before, lugging all his snacks around. He tells himself that he can get relief from the weight by eating his snacks faster, no problem! Every bite makes the load lighter, right? But, really, if he stopped to actually think for once, he would easily realize that it does nothing of the sort. It evens out.

The hours pass and Bucky’s backpack gets lighter as he munches, sure, but his belly just gets heavier and heavier to compensate. All those empty, unneeded calories go somewhere. 

Bucky moans to himself and squeezes (exaggeratedly… for now) through his apartment door to come home after a full day of eating. He’s supposedly working and taking a few snack breaks, but… as he’s lost control and shame, it’s more like he’s eating with the occasional work break. As he comes home after his hard day’s labor of stuffing his face, all Bucky can think about is how the weight of his backpack nearly pulled him over this morning when he snagged it on the way out, unprepared to pick it up with how out of shape he’s gotten. It was that heavy and now? It’s all in his gut now. Picturing his soft, empty, flabby belly in the mirror that morning, Bucky considers how it would look if he put his snack-pack on backward with the heavy, filled bag over his belly… God. It would stick out so far. It’d make him look so round. And, considering that his backpack is empty now, that’s how fat he’s gotten over the course of the day. 

Fuck. 

Steve swells like beer poured into a glass without being tilted, fizzing, foaming, reaching the rim of the glass, and almost overflowing. Steve’s fat is getting softer the more he gets of it, but he’s still so dense and firm. Yet, Bucky rises like proofed bread dough, all rounded with rolls escaping the sides of the pan and flowing over. Bucky’s fat is so exorbitantly soft. He’s squishy, really like bread dough, Bucky often finds himself kneading his plush body - he just can’t get enough.  

This time, when the two gaining, ripening men see each other again, they meet at a grocery store, bumping into each other all those months and pounds later with nothing to dull the impact. In the broad light of day, there are no flashing club lights, no writhing bodies (mostly thin and scantily clad, but just as sweaty as the two overpacked fatties still shoving more in their greedy, moaning mouths), and no pounding music to hide behind. There’s nothing but the evidence of their indulgence on complete display.

Steve is swaying through the alcohol section, debating between different kinds of wine - who’s he kidding, though? He’s going to end up with both and he’ll knock them back so fast he probably won’t even taste the difference. He best get both. Both and more. He just, oops, he needs to be careful because he might fall on his ass and then he’ll break the bottles which would just be a fucking waste. No one would get to drink them then! Steve wants to drink them so bad, he wants to drain them both right now into his sloshing, dizzying belly. He could be heavier. He always needs to be heavier. He wants to roll back to the Uber that brought him here and he doesn’t want to be able to be stuffed into his seat. He’s going to swell himself up until he’s not only constantly giggly and dizzy but so he’s so round that a seatbelt extender will be essential, otherwise he’ll never be able to fit into a taxi or Lyft or Uber again. Godddd, he wants more already, he feels like he’s drying up despite all the sloshes and burps he’s stifling. Maybe both and then a few six-packs?

Bucky, however, is plodding through the food aisles, half-pushing, half-leaning on a cart that’s haphazardly stacked with enough food for a family of six. He’s so fucking loud and noisy between his almost ground-shaking footsteps and fast, shallow breaths. He ate before he came. Isn’t that what you’re supposed to do? Never go grocery shopping hungry? He was just trying to follow the rules! But it doesn’t look like it’s worked on account of the crumbs around his mouth and the empty wrappers littering the baby seat of his cart. His gut is churning loudly - he just destroyed a whole box of snack cakes while debating what kind of ice cream he needs, thoughtless and shameless, only concerned with how to fill himself up until it hurts in the best way. Too tight. His belly keeps bumping the handle of the cart, so large that it makes his arms feel short.  

As they’re checking out, Steve isn’t looking where he’s going and he walks straight into Bucky. Bucky isn’t looking because he’s staring at the candy bars displayed near the front of the store, trying to drool remember if there’s any at the bottom of his cart or not.

Without their attention, they end up colliding belly to belly, making them both choke and groan, pressing on their sensitive guts sends hot, intense jolts of arousal through them both. It’s like pressing on a bruise - a big, fat bruise that’s been aching constantly for what feels like months. It’s a wonder neither of them come in their pants right then, hitting together like yoga balls and stumbling backwards, almost falling, they’re so on edge after months of unending gluttony. Stretched to their limits. Steve arches his back, reveling with a groan how his whole firm gut sloshes but doesn’t move all that much, he’s solid; Bucky curls around his soft tummy, breathing through the waves of heat with his fat jiggling everywhere, barely shoving a moan down. Neither of them can be out in public like this! This was a terrible idea! Now all they want to do is slump down and pant and digest a little so they might stand a chance at, at… 

Who hit him anyway?

Oh. 

They both look up at the same time, meeting each other’s dilated eyes and wondering, not even needing to speak out loud, how long they’ll have to wait to digest to be able to move better, just a little less sensitive, enough to touch each other - to squeeze and grope each other. Both of their bodies have ballooned, hugely fat, but they’re still so different. Hard and round; soft with rolls. How different are they these days? 

[alittlepudge-neverhurtnobody]

kinktober #19

Invasive Vines 🌿 / Sweet Shop 🍭

“Candy’s possessed,” David announces, and Ben shakes his head. 

“Always has been.”

“What?” says Kristen, cocking her head, and Ben rolls his eyes. 

“You’ve never seen that meme? You have four meme-age daughters and you’ve never seen the astronaut meme?”

Kristen shrugs. Ben goes to pull it up on his phone.

Father Ignatius fills them in on the case; a candy shop in Brooklyn has reported an unusual increase in gluttony from its customers and employees. Apparently it’s not the only candy shop affected recently, either — just the only one devout enough to call the church.

“How do we know it’s demonic gluttony and not just kids pulling pranks for Halloween?” David asks, and Father Ignatius shrugs.

“How should I know? That’s your job. I know it feels like busy work, but if it really is something demonic, it would be good to get a jump on it before the holiday. I get enough parents asking about razor blades in apples and whether celebrating Halloween is un-Christian without adding demonic candy to the mix.”

“Razor blades in apples has never been a thing,” says Ben. “It’s like the hoax about people giving kids drugs in Halloween candy. No one is wasting their hard-earned drugs on trick-or-treaters.”

Sister Andrea falls in with them as they file out of his office as if she’d been part of the conversation the whole time. “Well, of course it would be candy eventually,” she says. “Why do you think I use marshmallows to catch demons? They’ll eat themselves sick on the stuff if they get the chance.”

“Do you?” asks Kristen with interest. “Use marshmallows?”

Sister Andrea nods. “For the smaller ones, yes.”

“Okay,” says Kristen, because sure, why not. “Please don’t ever tell my girls about that. We’d never get rid of the ants.”

She lets Ben sit shotgun as David drives them out to Brooklyn, her gaze flickering between the Halloween decorations adorning the blur of brownstones outside her window and the open bag of candy corn in the center console between the boys. 

“Where’d that come from?” she asks, leaning forward and crinkling the bag.

David shrugs. “One of the church volunteers leaves little baskets for everyone at the church. She never misses a holiday.”

“Huh,” says Kristen. She’s not much for candy corn, but there’s something irresistibly sweet about watching David and Ben throw back handfuls while they talk about the case and banter about who had the worst Halloween costume back in the day (Ben pulls up a picture of him and Karima as awkward teens, wearing the most half-hearted, ill-fitting generic Star Trek uniforms Kristen has ever seen: “Mom didn’t exactly get the memo on what they were supposed to look like.”)

When they pull up to the candy shop, the place looks worse for the wear. The front window has been smashed and covered over with brown paper scrawled with the words WE’RE OPEN!, and the doorknob looks like it’s been blown off with dynamite and recently replaced with a shiny new one. “Jesus,” says Ben, cradling the new knob in his hand, and David’s brow furrows. 

“Is Halloween that cutthroat these days?”

“Spend an hour at my house after trick-or-treating,” says Kristen over her shoulder. “It’ll make your war journalism career look like Goodnight Moon.”

Ben laughs and follows her in, and David shepherds them from behind. The shop owner explains that they’ve had problems recently with employees stealing sweets from the store in bulk, with customers coming back to demand more than they paid for with the sweaty, aggressive insistence of desperation, with break-ins faster than they can repair the front windows that leave the till and safe untouched, but the candy bins emptied.

“Is there one candy that seems to be more of an incentive than the others?” asks David, and the shop owner shrugs. 

“The frogs have been a target. So has the candy corn, the regular and the pumpkins.”

Kristen mouths The frogs have been a target to Ben over David’s shoulder. The air inside is warm and humid despite the October chill outside, and when she leans over one of the bins and picks up a gummy frog with a marshmallowy underside, it sticks unpleasantly to her fingers. 

“And do they share a manufacturer?” asks Ben, sweeping his gaze around the shop. “Could’ve been some sort of chemical additive accidentally mixed into certain batches that’s reacting with a common medication or something.”

“Sure, lots of them come from Wingate’s in Jersey,” says the shop owner dubiously, “but not all of the varieties from the same manufacturer are causing the problems. The jujubes are made there, too, and nobody’s touching those.”

“That’s because they’re jujubes,” says Ben under his breath. 

“I like jujubes,” Kristen protests in a whisper.

“We’ll look into it,” David overlaps, louder. “Please don’t hesitate to call us if anything further happens.”

“Honestly?” says Ben from the backseat when they’re safely ensconced in the car. “Ignatius is right, this does feel like busy work. It’s probably some local parenting group trying to make a statement about how addicted kids are to sugar these days.”

“Ooh, yeah, probably,” agrees Kristen. “That’d be a pretty savvy approach, actually. Call the church, call it evil, and bam, you’ve got a great excuse to toss your kid’s Halloween candy.”

“Yeah,” says Ben, leaning forward for another handful of candy corn. “Or to eat it all yourself.”

— 

The next day, both of the boys look under the weather. Ben’s brown skin looks a bit grayer than usual, and David’s forehead is beaded with sweat, even though St. Joseph’s Parish is notoriously drafty. They’re waiting for her on a bench in the church hall, Ben slumped lightly against David’s big body, 

“You guys good?” asks Kristen, setting her bag down beside David’s knee. “There a cold or something going around?”

David grimaces. “I’ve got some bad news about that candy corn.”

“Oh no,” says Kristen, her stomach dropping. “From the volunteer?”

Ben nods, pressing an arm to his own stomach. “Yep.”

“So, what?” she says, laying her palm first on David’s forehead, then Ben’s: they’re both a little damp, but not feverish. “Were you both just up snarfing candy corn all night?”

“Yeah, just about,” says David, eyes downcast. In his turtleneck and thick sweater, he looks less like a man of God and more like a New England college student trying to explain away a hangover. “I said Mass this morning, but I had Father Dement take over for me this evening. I feel awful.”

“Do we think it’s related to the case?” Kristen asks, patting both of their knees and squeezing herself in between them. “Like a sabotage attempt?”

“Nah,” says Ben, stifling a burp. “I think we just got caught in the crossfire. Wingate’s probably manufactures candy that’s sold all over the city. It’s gonna be a miserable Halloween for most of New York if we don’t figure this out.”

Kristen looks between them. “Do either of you really think you can survive a drive out to Brooklyn right now?”

David swallows hard. Ben shakes his head.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” she says, resting a hand on each of their knees. “What do you say we go back to my place and regroup there? The girls will be in school for a few more hours, so it’ll be quiet.”

David nods gratefully. “I didn’t realize until today how badly a sugar coma would mix with church incense.”

“Why do I feel like maybe this is your doing?” Ben teases weakly as Kristen helps him to his feet. Beneath his t-shirt, she can see that he’s bloated, his stomach pressing against the thin fabric. David’s sweater is too thick for her to do the same, but now she wants to know. “Like you decided we needed a day to get mommed and slipped us wacky candy corn.”

“Oh, yes,” says Kristen, hauling up David next. He’s heavier, and when she puts a hand on his middle to steady herself, she gets the answer she’s craving: his stomach, too, feels hard and round beneath his clothing. “I’ve been playing the long game, dressing up as a little old lady and dropping off holiday gift baskets for everyone at church for years just to prepare for this moment because I think you guys aren’t getting enough days off.”

“Hmm,” says David, mock-suspicious. “I never said it was a little old lady.”

“They’re volunteers at the Catholic church,” quips Ben from Kristen’s other side. “The population skews heavily toward little old ladies.”

David laughs, then winces, palming at his belly. Kristen covers his hand with her own, and even though she’d never want him or Ben to be uncomfortable, there’s something thrilling about how big he feels, how packed full. She wants desperately to hear the sounds the two of them might make about it.

“So,” she says, hooking arms with them and leading them out to the car. “How long do you think before this candy thing goes viral?”

—

David and Ben are quiet on the drive back to Kristen’s. She keeps the heat off despite the chill, opens the windows to let in the rich, therapeutic wet-leaves-and-rain scent of fall, and she even resists the urge to crank up the radio and sing along when “Short Skirt/Long Jacket” comes on. 

She gets the boys set up on the couch, brings blankets and pillows, and digs up the green ginger tea she only ever pulls out when one of the girls is sick. She finds a half-empty, probably-flat bottle of ginger ale she clearly shoved to the back of the fridge months ago and forgot about and divides it among two glasses with ice, then pulls three mismatched mugs from the cabinet and pours tea. It takes two near disasters before she decides that she cannot cool-girl it up and walk out with all five cups at once.

“Need help?” calls David from the next room.

“Nope, I got it!” she yells back. “Just sit there and relax!”

She takes the ginger ale out first, then the tea. They’ve left room for her between them on the couch, and she slides in easily. “How’s that?” she asks, giving Ben’s stomach a little pat and David’s knee a squeeze. “I can get the heating pack from upstairs, too, if you want it.”

“Maybe later,” says David, wrapping an arm around Kristen as Ben starts on his tea. “I’ll just use your heat for now.”

“Mmm, fine by me.” She tucks her sock feet beneath her on the couch and gently massages his swollen belly. “You feeling any better?”

David catches a burp in his fist. “Not as nauseous. Just achy.”

She applies a bit of pressure with her hand, and David lets out a soft noise that would make her weak if she weren’t already curled on the couch. “Yeah,” she murmurs. “Yeah, there you go, baby. Let it all out.”

“Hey, can I get in on this?” asks Ben, shifting his weight so he’s canted more toward Kristen.

“Of course! I have two hands.” But she turns in his direction and gives him some attention, too, rubbing his belly and helping him push out a few uncomfortable burps. “Yeah, that’s it. Does that feel better?”

Ben sighs. “Yeah. Thanks.”

“I wonder how long it takes to detox from candy corn,” muses David, and then kicks out a laugh. “Another question I never asked myself until we started this job,”

“I feel dumb,” Ben grumbles into his mug. “This happens to people we assess, not to us.”

“That’s the universe putting us in our place,” says Kristen, sipping her own tea. “Just like my favorite Bible verse says: what’s good for the goose is good for the gander.”

David rolls his eyes. “Yes, what book is that again?”

Kristen shoots him a winning smile, all bright teeth and fluttering eyelashes. “Uh, I think it’s The Book of I Have Four Daughters Who Love to Push My Buttons.”

“Hey,” says Ben suddenly. “Does candy corn have gelatin in it?”

Kristen raises an eyebrow. “Ew. Does it?”

David fishes his glasses from some heretofore-unseen pocket and perches them on the end of his nose. “Looks like it does,” he says after a moment of googling. “And those frog gummies probably would, too, right? With that marshmallow base?”

“Yeah!” says Kristen, crowding in. “Do you think it’s related to the pork thing? What was the name? Belmonte?”

David scrolls. “Of the company, yeah. Garcia was the guy who ran the farm we visited.”

“Right, with the son who got possessed,” Ben puts in. “Gelatin’s gotta come from somewhere, and Jersey’s close enough that the Garcia farm could be a viable source. And it would explain why only some of the candies were affected. The stuff without gelatin would be totally fine.”

“Score one for the jujubes,” says Kristen, and Ben pokes her gently.

“Hey!” she teases. “I don’t know why you’re picking on my taste when David once told us he genuinely enjoys the Eucharist wafers.”

“You know how I think you could enjoy those?” says Ben, folding his hands behind his head and leaning back. “Drop ’em into hot oil like everyone’s doing with those rice paper circles on VidTap so they puff up and get crunchy. Little salt, little hot sauce …”

“You can’t deep-fry the Body of Christ,” David protests, laughing. “Another group of words I never thought I’d say in that order.”

“But are they the Body of Christ before they’re consecrated, though?” asks Kristen, drawing her knees up to her chin and leaning on David. “I think you can just buy them in bulk online, unblessed.”

“Let’s find out,” says Ben, opening his phone. “Oh, yeah. You can get a thousand for under twenty bucks.”

“Nooo,” moans David, dropping his head into his hands. “I thought we were here to regroup, not blaspheme.”

“We already regrouped,” says Kristen brightly, kissing his cheek. She takes Ben’s free hand and brings it into her lap. “Now it’s time for blaspheming. And if all this talk about communion wafers is making you hungry, I’m sure I can scrounge up something …”

“No!” yelp David and Ben in unison, and Kristen grins. 

“Okay, okay. Just keep me posted. I wouldn’t want either of you going hungry.”

“I don’t think I’ll be hungry again until the weekend,” says David, leaning back on the couch and bringing his ginger ale to his lips.

Ben lets out a burp. “I dunno,” he says with a crooked smile. “I could probably be convinced a little sooner. I don’t have dinner plans tonight.”

“I’ve got chicken soup in the freezer,” says Kristen. “If I take it out now, it’ll have plenty of time to thaw. That all right?”

She ducks back into the kitchen, then gets a fresh kettle going and makes herself a little snack to eat while the water heats. When she goes out to the living room to collect mugs, Ben is bunched against David, a blanket pulled over their legs.

“Nap time?” she guesses, and they both nod. They look irresistibly cozy, and the kettle will wait, so instead she cuddles up to David’s other side and pulls the blanket over her own legs as well. Beneath the fleece, she finds David’s hands, laced over his belly, and then Ben’s, braced on David’s arm. When she dozes off, it’s to the slightly uneven rhythm of their breathing, to the warmth of their heat.

[inconspicious-random-thoughts]

I think it’s more straightforward than that.

It’s not “Angels worshipped good and shielded all from evil.”

It’s “Angels worshipped Good and shielded all from Evil.”

Capitalised. That God is Good. The concept of goodness, its embodiment in the same way the Grim Reaper is death, or how the Sins are all embodiments of concepts (Asmodeus also literally being Lust, not figuratively). So Evil is Evil, an actual being Good’s Angels kept at bay, until Lucifer and Lilith gave Eve the Apple, and the Root of Evil took hold of her, making her its embodiment and forming Hell, a domain of its own to rival Heaven. With Lucifer’s true job being that of the jailkeeper, to prevent Evil from attaining enough power to overtake creation. Charlie and Vaggie meaning well but being oblivious to the truth of the world, since their superiors never told them the whole truth, since it didn’t seem they needed to know, or it was assumed they must.

Hello there.

It’s not “Angels worshipped good and shielded all from evil.”

It’s “Angels worshipped Good and shielded all from Evil.”

In the subtitles, its not capitalized. I am one of those people who has trouble watching and hearing something if I can't read it. lol.

But I won't deny the possibility of human error of the person doing the subtitles. The subtitle of one of Alastor lines was messed up. The subtitle saying it a lot less hot instead of fun, So we know mistake can happen. I honestly prefer the literally version of the capitalized.

Capitalised. That God is Good.

I full hearted agree that the "good/Good" representation in this still is God. I love how Good is taken more feminine features. Then the stereotypical male God because of whole biblical "Adam was made in God image" thing. But the show already shown different takes and not biblically accurate but its own universe that was inspired by it. Tho, one can argue they are genderless since they are celestial beings similar to Good Omens. They just take an image and "have to put an effort" for the genitals.

So Evil is Evil, an actual being Good’s Angels kept at bay, until Lucifer and Lilith gave Eve the Apple, and the Root of Evil took hold of her, making her its embodiment and forming Hell, a domain of its own to rival Heaven.

I agree that angels had to fight her to keep her (and possibly minions...I mean there were angels...so Good counterpart would have similar powers to have agents? )out. This as, I say this...I have the funny image meme "let me in" but with Roo with Heaven.

I like to consider Roo and Eve as two separate bodies. Because it was shown that Roo was standing next to Good before Adam and Lilith was created. That Roo already was an embodiment that manifested of evil. Since good and evil can't really exist without the other.

But one can argue that those were just illustration to represent. That Good and Evil had no true body yet. That they were omnipresence and exist. Similar to air. It exist, it around you but no true form. One can say Evil took on a form when Eve committed the first sin. But I don't oppose ideas and theories that Roo has latched onto Eve as some type of host. It would explain why Eve been MIA so far.

Personally, I like the idea that the physical forms manifested as the sin were committed. Then only grow larger and stronger as more people commit them. For example, Beelzebub came into existence then the act of Gluttony happened opposed the sins taking bodies as host. Then she grew more powerful each time time as people committed those sins through all of time. Roo falls into this category too.

I suspect that something happen to Roo that she missing a corporeal body or is somehow imprisoned which why she sort of laying low at the moment and pulling strings with deals to have servants and other minions. She still a force to be reckoned with and is slowly working toward on getting a suitable body and freedom.

Eve may play a role with Roo for sure. Either, she been with/is Roo this entire time or play an upcoming role in Roo strategy.

With Lucifer’s true job being that of the jailkeeper, to prevent Evil from attaining enough power to overtake creation. Charlie and Vaggie meaning well but being oblivious to the truth of the world, since their superiors never told them the whole truth, since it didn’t seem they needed to know, or it was assumed they must.

I already fully believe in jailkeeper Lucifer. Lucifer 100% knows about Roo. Not by simple knowledge because he once was an Angel of Heaven. He directly had to dealt with her. A high chance the direct reason why Roo has to lie low. Lucifer had somehow trap/imprison/weaken/rid of Roo body (you can't really destroy evil...but maybe its form to keep it from getting stronger?)

That Roo is not really secret but something Lucifer doesn't want to talk about. Or maybe it IS a secret because it somehow strengthen her. Like how a name has power in some fables? So, Roo truth became a myth over time because it was commanded or an unspoken rule not to speak of Evil... Which is why Charlie and Vaggie would be clueless about Roo beside being a "fairy tale villain." that Lucifer and Adam/Sera mention when they were younger. Charlie and Vaggie being shocked and scared to realized that Roo is real.

You know we are going to have Vaggie do a backstory of Roo like she did with Alastor in the pilot.

Roo will probably do something to Lucifer to at least temporarily weaken him or trap him. So out princess will have to step up and come to power. Something/someone has to make her go full power and something/someone has to prevent Lucifer from swooping in and saving the day every time. That trope of ultimate power saving the day would get old real fast. Who better then Roo to take Lucifer down (hopefully only temporary)

[cup1dt3a]

Welcome to Blotted Wonderland

Summery: What if instead of our Mc transporting into twisted wonderland they transported into Blotted Wonderland. A dark inky land with highly unstable, obsessive, and power hungry men with lots of blood lust. How would it be if we instead the world of Wonderland was everyone they would’ve known but even more twisted? Want to come and find out? I’ll warn you though even the slightest ray of sunshine is eventually consumed by the darkness. So still willing to come adventure into the world of Blots brave one?

You felt horrible. Everything was dark and suffocating. Every sharp breath you took had little and littler oxygen. The lack of oxygen made you dizzy as you tried to stand up in this dark void. Everything was black and eerily quiet. All except your echoing breaths could be heard in the darkness. As you looked around a voice suddenly boomed in the echoing void. noticed a pitch black hand reaching out of the void of darkness.

“ Hmmm….another mortal? How strange I sense no pride, greed, envy, lust, wrath, gluttony, or even sloth. You’re quite a rare soul in this sea of lost souls. Maybe you could guide them back out of the darkness only time shall tell…Take the hand.” The chilling voice demanded as a now inky hand shot up from the floor?

You didn’t know why or what made you take the hand but you did. As soon as you did the hand had swiftly pulled you down dragging you with it into its ink filled home for it to consume you.

You gasped out taking all the oxygen you could into your burning lungs. As you hyperventilated for any amount of air you had to now get your breathing under control before continuing on. Taking a shaky breath as you started to look around the unfamiliar area. It began to look more eerie than the void you were stuck in. It had looked like an abandoned auditorium. Everything was broken and covered in what looked like to be black slime? You paid no mind to it dismissing everything else except wondering where you were.

As you walked towards the broken doors to exit the eerie room a sudden booming growl stopped you in your tracks. You could feel them breathing onto you each tremendous breath felt as if you were in a storm. This would be it for you. Dying in a foreign place and being devoured by whatever monstrous beast was behind you. Trebling in fear you squeezing your eyes shut you felt a scaled texture coil around you with a sudden hissing. The creature lifted you off the ground right in front of its ginormous face. You opened your eyes confused seeing that they hadn’t tried to eat you yet. Was this some sick game it played with its prey before ending their life? As you opened your eyes a cat like face with odd marking and Blue ears of fire looked down upon you. Along with its hissing tail? Was this it for you? All hope had seemed lost until the creature dropped you

The creature backed away from you. They then growled and charged through a broken wall creating an even bigger hole in it. You coughed at the dust flowing into the air. As the dust cleared up you could now see the horrors that would soon await for you.

Soon after seeing how playtime was over with the beast you began wondering around the area in ruins. Everything was just covered in this blotchy black slime? You weren’t sure of what the substance was, but didn’t want to find out. The area looked like an abandoned rich kid school with the broken down fancy look to it. You were soon greeted with creepy statues of what looked to be 7 Disney villains. The queen of hearts, Scar, Ursula, Jafar, The evil queen, Hade’s, and Maleficent. What odd things to have at a school. You brushed it off and soon found yourself in a hallway full of lockers. As you observed the unfamiliar area a sudden crash had you jumping back in fear. Holding your hands over your mouth so no sound could alert whatever that was. Even if it was that cat thing it could still kill you in a split second. As you tried to move farther away from the sounds of what seemed to be fighting eventually you were backed into a locker small enough for you to hide in.

“ YOU DAMED FOOL! NOW WERE EVEN DEEPER SHIT BECAUSE OF YOU!” a man with navy blue hair sneered at his red head rival. “ WOW!THATS RICH COMING FROM THE DELINQUENT!” the red head cackled harshly gripping into the bluenett hands trying to choke him out. The bluenett’s features were a little hard to make out but nothing except the twos glowing eyes stood out to you. The blue one was just as pale as the other guy and what seemed to be the same unknown slime had been marked across them like tattoos. You held your breath knowing that if either of them heard you you’d be as a good as dead. “ KNOCK IT OFF BEFORE WE GET IN EVEN MORE TROUBLE YOU TWO MORONS!” A dark man with wolf ears growled tearing the two from each other by their arms. It seems that as you focused on the two arguing you hadn’t noticed the other three men’s arrival. Each all sharing a different colored glowing eye. The green haired one tsk’d at the three as the rivals started to try beating each other to a pulp again. While the wolf eared man tried breaking their beyond violent fight. A short purple headed boy had been cheering one of them on with a thick country accent. As you had been ever so greatly unnoticed by the violent group. You eventually couldn’t hold your breath so ever so slightly you had wrapped your hand around your mouth. Hoping that it would block the sound of your trembling breaths. It didn’t.

The wolf eared man’s ear twitched as soon as you started breathing. Shouting for everyone to shut up catching all of their attention. The green haired man had also caught onto hearing your now silent breaths but thumping heart beat. The wolf eared man had soon started sniffing the air as he crept closer to the locker you were in. This was it. This was the end of the line for you. Everything you had ever done and your future now is going to be gone. As the dim lighting illuminated their features all their glowing eyes peered down upon you as the wolf was shoved out the way by the two that were just fighting. Both of them jerking you out of the cramped space. ” We’re all seeing this right!? They have no marks or blot on them!” The red head exclaimed treating you as nothing but a rag doll.

“ Holy Shit! Look at their damn eyes too!” The bluenett added on.

” Ugh it’s just a filthy human let’s just get rid of the damn thing!” The green haired man exclaimed.

“ Ok yeah let’s just kill’em! We ain’t gonna fucken kill’em dumbass it’s rare enough for someone in this hellhole to not have overblotted!But the ‘Queen ’might if they see’em.” The shorted male sarcastically rolled his eyes at the taller male.

“ Do you people not know what personal space is by any means?” The wolf growled at the group overcrowding you.

They all backed up as the more responsible one of the group analyzed you still keeping his distance. Only getting closer to sniff you. This was weird. You’d expect them to just kill you now what are they waiting for. The green haired guy is the only one you’re betting everything onto that’ll do the job and get it over with. This mercy of theirs is too good to be true. ” Let’s take them to the leaders. This human might just help us get out of the trouble you two caused!” He snapped glaring directly at them.

Who are their leaders?

Hope you all enjoyed this and that you’re having a good day or that it gets better!

Sincerely-Cup1dT3a ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

@simping-on-the-daily I remembered :D

[silverinkbottle]

Chapter 3: Shopping Around

A/N: Delayed chapter, but here it's here! We get a glimpse of Reader's Past, Alastor's introduction and Vox's unwelcome arrival.

Word Count:4.8K

Chapter Two <- Previous Chapter

Darkness. A muted scream in the void, curling pressure around your thighs as if something was trying to drag you deeper into the black. You awoke with a sputtering cough as you jolted upward in the cozy bed. Unconsciously loosening your fingers from around your throat as you took another ragged breath. Dreams, once little escapes for the living, but in your mind a consistent reminder of the present. Black ink stained your fingertips as you looked down at them. Little delicate hands that hadn’t seen a spot of hard labor as you relied on your wits to get by. That hadn’t changed as you could feel the bitter taste of ink fading over your tastebuds. Was it getting worse? Or was it from waking up in an entirely new place that amplified your awareness?

It was all too tempting to fall back into the warm sheets as you fell back down with a huff. The weight of the bags under your eyes made it clear that you hadn’t slept well. Or if at all as you tried to remember the events of the night before. The mere fraction of movement as Lucifer tried to find the ideal spot for his desk. The chicken-scratch quality notes as he flipped through catalogs of furniture featured in the various Rings. Did he really want your opinion on flowers that had potentially fatal side effects? You could all but feel the slow pulse of headache from the mere memory of it as it reared its’ strength as your bedroom door slammed open.

The blonde tornado was in rare form today as you scrambled to keep your bedsheets up around you, while still reaching for the little black book on your nightstand. Boundaries, the King of Hell hadn’t a clue about boundaries as he continued oblivious to your discomfort. Your fogged mind managed to sort out the gist of the conversation. A shopping trip between daddy and daughter. Did you think Charlie would let him buy her new furniture? Her quarters were sparse, she deserved the world. But what if she said no? Should he take her to the boutiques of Greed first or would that opulence be too much? Was it better to ease her into it with Gluttony slow temptation?

Half of that was a muffled mess as Lucifer tripped over the edge of the floor rug into the end of your bed. His hat in disarray as you did your best to hide your laughter at his feeble leg kicks. Looking very much like his beloved waterfowl in the water as you were quick to smother your smile when he managed to right himself. 

“Well. What do you think?” Lucifer huffed as you slowly trailed your pen over the hastily scribbled notes. You only knew the Princess through Lucifer’s biased views, but you could only imagine the chaos if the pair were unleashed in a Greed department store. It would be better for them to warm up, it seemed.

“Perhaps, a trip to Guttony for a spot of breakfast would be best.” You cautioned as Lucifer nodded in agreement. A full stomach would dissuade even the most determined of shoppers. It was an unfortunate flaw that even you admitted to as you became quite sluggish in the morning if it wasn’t a light meal.

“But I don’t know what she would like..what if-”

“It's the Gluttony Ring, sir, I am sure she will find something that tickles her fancy..” You were quick to cut off the words with a firm, but kind tone. The last thing you needed was the misanthropic man agonizing over if his estranged child would prefer pancakes over scones. Discreetly pulling on your robe, you were quick to usher him out of your quarters with a few nods of affirmation and hums. 

There was a distant screech of protest and shouts as Lucifer had taken off to find Charlie without a second glance. Did she know about the trip? Far coarser words bounced off the walls from Vaggie, as the answer came in a resounding NO. Spontaneity ran in the family as a loud squeal came from Charlie as who knew what sorts of ideas Lucifer was filling her head with. 

Quickly slamming your bedroom door shut, to prevent you having TWO issues on your hands. Charlie, at least, seemed to have a sense of space compared to her father. An eerie sense of calm trickled through you. A day off? It wasn’t as if Lucifer would drag you along to intrude on a bit of family bonding time. Still, the concept almost felt foreign to your workaholic mind as you trudged over your wardrobe with little flair. You couldn’t lay in bed all day, it was far too indulgent. Nor would sleep find you as you could feel your throat tighten at the thought. 

No, there was a far more appealing option. A nice drink and your little black book.

The parlor of the hotel was strangely quiet aside from the faint click of glasses from the bar. Even its usual barfly was out for the day as you fiddled with the collar of your coat. Husker acknowledged your presence with a grunt before taking a better look at your outfit. 

“It's a bit morbid isn’t it?”

“I prefer nostalgia. Mink was expensive in my time, don’t you know..” You retorted with a sniff. Your ears twitched as you could hear a rumble of activity from upstairs. Nothing fell through the second floor, so things seemed to be fine. Yet, the bartender had a point. The flattened empty skin of a fox’s head draped over your throat, while its brilliant coat of reds and whites curled around your body. The coat’s lower half mingled with warmer felts and velvets as it tried to conceal the poorer quality of the pelt.  Clasped closed by the steel brooch as you crossed your legs revealing a sliver of fishnets beneath the pelts as you leaned against the bar.

“Now are you going to critique my choices in fashion or are you going to serve me a drink?”

“Gin n tonic?”

“Make it a whisky on the rocks. It’s my day off..” You muttered as Husker raised a furred brow at the drastic change in choice. A gin and tonic was light, botanical and easier on the tongue. Yet, whiskey burned like hot coals as it slid down the gullet. Even if garnished with a lemon twist as the little twist elegantly floated in the amber liquid. Oh, it burned, it burned away at the whispering thoughts as you were quick to order another. Then another. Burning away memories like a greedy flame licking away at fresh paper.

“And he thinks it’s alright!” Your voice pitched in emotion as you slammed your hand down on the polished counter as Husker looked more and more put out with each passing second. As if this sort of situation had been forced upon him frequently. He was a bartender afterall.

“So, we talking about the big boss or Al?” Husker growled 

“That’s-not-the-point” You hiccuped as you could feel scarlet chase over your features. Warming your features in an entirely different manner compared to the liquor seeping through your rational thoughts. How did bitching about furniture and boundaries turn into this as you took another sip of your drink. Was this the third or fourth, you were losing count. Your tail lashed betraying your agitation as Husk’s keen eyes didn’t budge from your sulking form. He had a point. Fucker.

A cool burst of air ran up the back of your heated neck as the front doors slammed open. Husk visibly bristled as the intruder swept past them without a single word. 

“Fucking prick. Don’t he know that-”

“Shorter than I thought he would be” You snickered as you drained the whiskey in one final draught. Swiving in your chair, you waited for the entertainment to start. The fruitless attempts of watching the one-sided dance between Vox and the unfettered guards. One step to the left, another tick of a typewriter as another pair of paperboys appeared to impede the Overlord. 

“FUCK” Vox snarled as his hand was bitten into as he tried to shove one of the paperboy’s back by the shoulder. A further burst of giggles slipped from your loose lips as the Overlord cradled his injured hand. FInally he spun around on his heel to witness you almost falling off the barstool as you idly waved them off from pouncing on the overlord.

“Where the fuck is Lucifer and what the fuck is with these-”  Vox’s hand bled freely as the crimson droplets flew through the air. The paperboys were all but trembling with anticipation, but didn’t budge a step from the stairs as you dismissed them with a short whistle. The creatures tipped their hands before vanishing into a spontaneous black burrow. Vox connected the dots with ease as he turned to the head up the stairs once more.

“He is out. Please, Mr. Vox do not make me call reinforcements. I can write a message for him if you insist.” 

The words came out fluidly if a bit clipped as your job had molded around you like a cap to a bottle. Even in your intoxicated state, the script that left your lips was without flaw. Even if your amusement of the situation was betrayed by your tiny smile taking satisfaction in the entire situation.  

“And when will he come back?” Vox asked politely, almost all too sweetly. Losing patience with the word ‘no’ it seemed or anything that impeded him from getting what he wanted. An Overlord at the base. There was a click of ice and liquor as you snorted unladylike into your fresh glass.

“Do I look like I know? I can’t exactly demand the King of Hell ignore his whims.” You sighed before taking a sip of the fresh drink. The kindly bartender had even garnished it with a cherry as you fished it out of the cold glass. Evidently taking as much joy in seeing the Overlord get stifled in his own plans as you did.

“And who the fuck are you exactly?” Vox growled as you could feel the static in the edge of your skirts cling to your skin as the Overlord leaned over you. A show of intimidation as you gently returned the glass to its coaster.

“Lucifer’s secretary. Now, would you like to leave a message?” You replied sweetly as that answer seemed to deflate Vox’ temper by a hair. You weren’t affiliated with the Hotel in any capacity beyond Lucifer, which meant you weren’t affiliated with HIM. Oh, wasn’t he terribly clever as he gestured to the ragged coat.

“You’re Lucifer’s secretary, but you dress like this? Take a position at Voxtech and you’ll be flush with cash. If you play your cards right.” Vox explained as he placed an unwelcome hand on your shoulder that you were quick to brush away with a scowl. He even had the nerve to spin you back around in your chair as you faced the bar. The Overlord crowding your space without a single notion of boundaries.

“Scotch.” Vox barked at Husk, the bartender huffed at the order. He wasn’t some sort of dog that did tricks on command. The rattle of scotch decanter was all too loud as fingertips brushed over your face to make you look at the Overlord.

“Come on, what’s a little tour around the King’s office gonna do. Come on now.” Vox teased as you bit down the urge to respond with violence. Bitter ink whispered over your tongue as the Overlord’s other hand slid over your thigh. Far too close for comfort as you swallowed the bitter ink. You couldn’t fall apart now.

“I would like to keep my job. Now if you would remove your hand from my thigh. I am married..” You hissed as Vox laughed at your response. 

“Married. In Hell. Hate to remind you of that, sweetheart, not sure if those sorts of vows mean anything down here.” Vox tutted as his grip on your face tightened. His request for a tour was turning into a demand as you pulled your face away from him.

“Oh, do try telling that to my husband, can’t get it through his skull. As damaged as that is.” You retorted as you removed the gloves from your hand. The brass ring on your finger caught in the light as Vox rolled his eyes.

“Besides, now why would I want to work for someone like you. Called my work a fucking puff peace followed by the apparent ‘dismissal’ of over half of Velvette’s love potion staff after sources revealed what exactly was in them. Coddled, old, semen and burnt bedspreads if I remember my wording correctly..” You hissed as if the insults were laid against you yesterday instead of all those years.

“Truth hurts doesn’t it.” You snarled as the glass in Vox’s hand shattered. Now you have sent the Overlord into a little fit. The lightbulbs behind the bar shattered as Husk protest was lost in the groaning noise of the walls. Ink trickled from the corner of your mouth as you staggered into an upright position. The drinks weren’t the best idea, but neither was running away from the irate Overlord.

“Oh, I thought I heard something pathetic.” 

“You’re ALIV-E”

The glitched snarl went mute to your ears as you were hastily dragged behind the bar counter by Husk lest you become a part of the damage to the Hotel. Steel cables ripped from the walls, snapping like electric snakes as Alastor descended the stairs, green energy crackling from the microphone. The world went silent around you as bitter ink spilled fruitlessly from your lips as Husk tried to ask you a question. His ears pinning back was the last sight you had before the world went dark.

New Orleans: 1923

Jazz, cigar smoke and patrons floated about you as you narrowly avoided running into a stumbling patron as your drink’s tray rattled ominously. It would be the last straw if you dropped this tray as the expensive whiskey swayed in its protective glass as if swaying to the trumpets. Your destination is a trio of chain smoking gangsters who greeted you with a cheer as you set the drinks down.  A pat on the butt and earning one dollar bill was your reward as you clutched the money to your chest. Their attention didn’t last long as a busty blonde on stage burst into another number, backed by thundering trumpets. You were quick to retreat from the table, tucking the cash into your camisole as the bartender barked further orders at you. The rest of the night was blur as you blissfully took a break to sip water tinged with lime. Alcohol didn’t agree with your mother, it wouldn’t with you. You didn’t take that chance.

Unfortunately you weren’t alone for long as a strong-looking hand flicked at the feather in your cream headband. Benson? Bronson? Regardless of the gentleman’s name, he was quick to call your attention as you forced a polite smile on your face. He was quick to press a kiss to your hand as you caught scant words over the thundering music.

A date? With him. Tonight. He had just purchased a new vehicle that he needed to take a real drive. Get its wheels muddy as his fingers grazed your bare arm. Blushing prettily you were too quick to decline with a shake of your head.

“Come on now, don’t be like that. I saw how you pocketed that cash, baby doll. I could make it worth your while.” His words were a rasp against your ear as his other hand slid up your leg. The threadbare stockings and patch jobs gave him all the information he needed to know about your financial status. Struggling, destitute, so like the select other women here willing to ply guests with other ‘offers’. Your stubborn pride made you want to kick off at the idea, but rent and bills were coming due. It was just one time, right?

“Apologies for being late, the cops are sniffing about tonight. Be a shame if Harry’s was caught out in it all.” A smooth voice broke through your thoughts as your intended suitor cursed under his breath before backing off. His quick retreat made it all the clearer that the trio wasn’t under the control of Mob Boss Gisno, but someone else entirely as you watched them scatter like a group of rats.

Further to the point there was something familiar about your eevedropper’s voice. You didn’t recognize him at all. Brown almost black hair curled neatly, deep brown eyes and taller than average stature made him almost indistinguishable. Yet it was the voice that was striking a cord in your mind.

“Ha, I'm afraid this happens often. People hear the voice, but draw a blank in person.” Your eavesdropper mused as he drained his glass of rye within a single blink of the eye. A practiced drinker it would seem as the truth forced itself to the front of your mind.

“You’re that radio host. Aren’t you? Stirred up a bit of controversy last week in response to some bluenose housewife protesting your local news taking precedence over some hacksaw politician’s newest election numbers.” You mused as the radio host’s lips curled into a faint smile. His hands raised in surrender as you laughed softly.

“Unless she is blind, she can read print like the rest of us. As difficult as some of that is to swallow these days.” You grumbled as you rolled your eyes far too often reading the morning papers. Even worse still was when the little paperboys swarmed you with the ‘true’ gossip as soon as you purchased it. Half of it was powdered sugar and the other was full of shit. As if the public needed more excitement in their lives than the present. 

“Not a fan of the papers?” The host mused as he leaned forward on his hand. As if he didn’t expect to find another admirer of the media tonight, but what was he looking for then? It wasn’t going to be found at the bottom of a bottle.

“Reality has tainted my taste for fairy tales..” You muttered as you took a long drink of your water.  The host chuckled before gesturing to the chaos surrounding you. Men and women in states of intoxication seeking something to hide away from the truth or some old wound. 

“Now you sound like some crone. I imagine you have quite a few more years to pass through, my dear.” The host tutted as you scoffed in response. Some here could forget their troubles for the night, but it would catch up with them come morning.

“A radio host and fortune teller. What an exotic career you must lead.” 

“I have the smallest amount of my mother’s talent. Besides, it’s written all over your face, you want to be anywhere else but here. New Orleans isn’t home is it?” The host prodded as you sheepishly ducked your head. No, it wasn’t. You grew up in northern New York, away from the Big Apple. After your Pa died, Mother couldn’t manage the forestry business, so she packed up her brood of kids to head to the city. Picked up the bottle too.

“I didn’t mean to-”

“No. You’re right, I arrived here a year ago. Finding my feet still it seems. Work has been harder to come by than I thought. No one wants a secretary with a mouth or unwillingness to play second fiddle to a housewife.” You muttered as bitterness coated the words. It was after the third time you impaled a handsy employer’s palm with a pen point that had soiled your reputation. Despite your quality work, no one wanted to be bit by a rabid bitch.

“When I find myself stuck, I like to look up at the stars.” 

“Here, in the city? Those must be some glasses you have there.”

“No. Even been to the bayou, Miss. Stars like fire and mangroves towering around you make your problems seem all the smaller.”

“You must be a radio host with such poetic words like that. Able to make a bayou sound like a fairy tale. It can’t be that fantastical.”

“It is, if you were with the right person.”

Charming. Smooth. Able to match your sharp words with gentle persuasion. That was the first night you met Alastor in that smokey speakeasy. Him plucking topics out of you like he was fox finessing a chicken’s feathers.

“You good?”

Husker’s rough voice broke you from your trance as you hissed in discomfort when you tried to move. It felt like every single part of your body had been pricked by needles as you wiped away the trickle of ink from your lips. Husk was quick to grab you by the arm to hold you place as you tried to stand up. It was for the better as plaster crumbled from the wall behind you. You didn’t dare imagine the carnage that waited beyond the safety of the bar. Glass, plaster and other materials littered the floor in front of you as you could hear the crackle of electricity in the air.

“How long was I out?” You muttered as you tried to flex your fingers. Ignoring the prickling sensation as you forced the fatigued digits to respond.

“Bout thirty minutes. Happen often?” Husker pressed as you blinked at him once. His scoff was all the answer you needed. He knew that Sinners carried their burdens in all sorts of ways. A bit of a black out wasn’t unheard of it. 

“Motherfucker!” The curse slipped from your lips as liquor bottles were smashed by an errant tentacle emerging from the wall, swiping out at glass bottles as their sticky contents rained down on your sheltering forms. Ignoring the prickle of alarm up your spine, you knocked against the ruined floor, a black burrow appeared underneath it. A furry brown arm stuck out as if waiting for paper

“I don’t have paper with me. Quick go fetch Lucifer, lest these territorial dogs wreak the entire hotel.” You hissed as the messenger gave a thumb’s up. A bark of laughter and parade of insults baited your curiosity to peer over the counter, much to Husk’s low protests.

“Getting slow on your feet old man.” Vox snarled as you couldn’t help flinch as the crackling wires snapped at Alastor’s side. Searing a hole in fabric as the radio demon retaliated by slipping a tentacle around his opponent’s legs to trip him up. It was a miracle the parlor still stood as Vox’s dismantling of the electrical system left crumbling plaster in its place, while Alastor was less than careful on where he spawned the rampaging tentacles that swung at anything in their vicinity. 

You weren’t an architect, but you knew any further structural damage would send the newly rebuilt hotel crumbling. Visible relief flooded you as bright light burst in the center of the room, putting both combatants on their toes. A first several bewildered, overburdened imps with packages appeared, followed by Charlie’s shrill screech of protest as she took in the ruins about her.  Vaggie beside her looked less than pleased, but by the far the biggest reaction came from Lucifer.

“Now sweetheart, what’s got you screeching like you are being bathed in boiling oil. Did you want something else from-. Oh.” Lucifer’s words trailed off as there was a sharp yelp from Vox as he was tripped up by a tentacle. Falling flat on his face much to Alastor’s joyful cackles that turned into a hiss as he was snapped at by the wires. 

“MY PARLOR.” Charlie cried out as her eyes prickled with tears before lightly placing her hand against the crumbling front door. A wail escaping her as that gentle action sent the elegant panes to fragment into pieces. 

“Now what happened here..” Lucifer’s voice was deathly calm as his eyes flicked to you as you carefully picked your way over from the bar wreckage. Your manicured nail jabbed in Vox’s prone form.

“He asked to speak with you.” A grumble escaped Vox as the Overlord raised his head in response, only to be stunned once more by a brick of falling plaster.

“He decided-” 

“I don’t need to understand the petty feuds between Overlords. Like fucking children in a sandbox fighting over toys. I am ASKING what happened.” Lucifer hissed as he tugged you down by the collar of your coat. Oh, he was in rare form now. 

“It appeared the Overlord known as Vox showed up without an appointment.” You stated bluntly as you flicked through your black book with a single brush of your fingertips. Thankfully Lucifer’s grip on your coat dropped after that. Laughter bubbled up from the King of Hell that sent ice down your spine. 

“Why is it that you Sinners think you can do whatever you want here. All but ready to barge into my OFFICE without an APPOINTMENT. Has the entire hierarchy of Hell fallen within half the day I have been gone.” Lucifer snarled as he gestured to wreckage around him. 

“I will say this once. Only once. Sinners don’t get to make demands in my kingdom. They make fucking appointments.” Lucifer snarled as he began to drag Vox over the rubble by the throat. What limited brain cells the Sinner had were working overtime as the Sinner forced himself to be as limp as a rabbit caught in the jaws of a lion. Even if it was painful as his screen-like face flickered colors when the Devil’s grip dragged him through sturdy stone and glass.

“He is never getting that fucking appointment if this puff piece author has anything to say about it..” You muttered under your breath as Husker chuckled at the snide comment. There was a sort of smugness about the bartender now as you both took in Alastor’s rougher shape, he hadn’t come out of the little spat unscathed. His left leg limped along as he leaned heavily on the cane as he did his best to clear the grit from his voice.

“Now, Charlie no need to fret, I’ll-”

“MY FUCKING WALL ALASTOR. Couldn’t you have taken it outside for once.” Charlie snapped as she whirled on her feet to face the dimming smile of the Radio Demon. Oh, this was going to be delightful as you and Husk posted up on the overturned bar stools as the Princess of Hell’s verbal rampage ran roughshod over the hotelier.  Evidentially that section of the hotel had gone through very short lifespans as Charlie’s voice pitched in volume with each interrupting attempt from Alastor. Tears ran freely down the Princess’s face as Vaggie intervened with a clap of her hands, gently comforting her girlfriend as she pointed at the wreckage.

“Fix it.”

“Done.” Flat, direct without a single hint of sarcasm as you spied his injured wrist spasm uncomfortably as little souls began the tedious process of cleaning up. 

A much calmer Lucifer returned moments later as he was quick to coddle his upset daughter. The pair were able to usher her up the half surviving portion of the main staircase as you gave a slow clap in the deafening quiet.

“Quite the show. Alastor. A day off well spent.” You announced as Alastor ran an agitated hand over his face.

“You still have half a day, don't ruin it.” Alastor hissed through clenched teeth as you nodded in agreement. Ruffled, Alastor was beyond ruffled after that little bout of combat. He was all but scolded like a disobedient guard dog by Charlie and in turn Vaggie. Were Lucifer’s words of Sinners ringing his ears now? The clear definition of Hell’s hierarchy. 

Oh. This was delicious.

“A bath I think would be perfect. Do enjoy your little chores, Alastor.” 

“Enjoy your bath, wife. It’s rather entertaining to see YOU play that card.” Alastor hissed as you forced a neutral expression on your face. Of all the drunken conversations he would have heard during your rants to Husk. It was that one, he had heard. The subtle deflection of your marriage to dissuade an arch rival of your ex-husband. 

It was with that simple knowledge that your leg was once caught again in a bear trap. So, you had two choices, free yourself in the long painful process of prying it open or allow yourself to bleed out. 

The metaphorical wound sputtered once as the back of his ring finger grazed over your hand as you stormed past him. Now you really needed that bath as you could feel guilt seep in with the sticky alcohol covering your ruined coat.

He had to have the last word in at least one situation today.

[ph-cutie]

one thing ABT hellaverse character designs is that a lotta detractors get hung up on the fact theyre not faithful to their stated inspirations but I think more important is we stop and ask ourselves where the fuck thess motifs even came from +If they hold Relevance to the characters. cause a lotta them are so asspulled its actually a good thing methinks that vivienne didn't follow through on them

particular ones I wanna discuss:

(BEE)LZEBUB

Besides the pun, what is the link between bees and beelzebub? Beelzebub has historically been known as the lord of the flies, flies and bees are not exactly interchangeable especially their human connotations. bees (and, not to name names but every single redesign of this thing ive seen) bring forth images of highly enforced hierarchy, militaristic discipline, perfectly cut hexagons, limited diet, aka fucking everything that Contradicts the initial premise of Lord Of Gluttony, Drunkard Girl. IS IT AN UNSALVAGEABLE IDEA? No I'm sure you could do something with it. Lean into the restlessness of a buzzing hive, or into honey's consumption by humans, as a delicacy. She could whose honey lures and traps flies, or something (fact that her song is about cotton candy given her whole thing is ludicrous btw). But like i dont see the point in going "Vivienne said she's a bee so I'm literally drawing her as a bee" and calling it a day.

HUSK AND WINGS

We do not question enough why the fuck husk is a winged cat. That just came out of nowhere The real reason is that he had wings back in zootopia for whatever reason, but this is the current day. WHAT DO HIS WINGS SYMBOLIZE? A large part of his character is being trapped under Alastor, and yet birds are a symbol of freedom. The show itself doesn't give a shit but we could. He could have his wings clipped or damaged to externalize how his freedom was stolen and also explain why he doesn't fly. Or it could be one of the only liberties he was allowed to keep , in which case the story should have him flying a lot more. Or any other number of things. TLDR YOU CAN'T JUST PUT HUGE ASS WINGS ON A CAT FURRY WITHOUT MAKING IT MEAN ANYTHING (tbh though anyone else think he shouldve been a kitty manticore instead... would be kinda funny and less convoluted. but whatever)

I dont know if this post is coherent I dont wanna sleep on it <3

[cult-bull]

Crowns of Sins Thoughts

What's up with the red crown and sin? Why does it promote it? Does it eat it? Does it need its host to grow stronger? (Most certainly making a Crowns and Hosts thoughts posts later too)

Obviously, the sins of the flesh update came later on in the game's development and in interviews I remember the creators talking about coming up with ideas and letting their writers figure out how it fits into the lore afterwards, so who knows how much is intended from the start and how much just came later.

The red crown being able to talk seems to have been there from the start, since it has speech coming from it so to say during doctrine choosing, at least it feels implied now that we know it can speak.

How sins work seems quite separate from the bishops and their crowns… until you try to think about it. Kind of. Maybe it's retroactively fitting pieces into where they could belong but hey, this is my blog and my journal of random cult of the lamb thoughts not proper theory crafting XD

I don't think it works though when just limiting yourself to the Christian seven deadly sins.

Leshy I'm throwing out the window instantly. I'm not sure what sin his chaotic ass could represent, as I'm saving wrath for someone else and even then, Leshy doesn't really seem... wrathful. Angry, loud, first boss energy, but not wrathful. He is the youngest god though, so maybe he just didn't have the time to be that sinful.

The only sin he is so far guilty of is being a weirdly cute follower

Heket is almost too easy in comparison. Gluttony, and even greed in terms of hoarding food from others by causing famines and giving their followers food if they worship well, and possibly because Mida's cave is near it, being pretty close to it on Jalala's map right between it and darkwood

It would be a bit easier to tell if we got more proper lines of where each "territory" of a bishop ends and begins. How large something actually stretches is questionable

Anyway, Heket would certainly fit right into a user of a ritual like the cannibalism one (and regain all her devotion through the mushroom drugs) so it just fits right in there.

Kallamar is where my "seven deadly sin" thing not working comes up. He is not guilty of any classic sin, nor does he promote it. I know we all in the fandom like to make him lustful, partially due to that one bishop hotline video I'm sure, but I'm not sure if anything else points him into a lust category in game though, If yes, feel free to correct me.

However

I do say betrayal and selfishness could count as sinful. He is a scaredy-cat (a powerful scaredy-cat but still), but he rather throws his siblings, especially a broken Shamura under the bus of your vengeful wrath when you come to get him post killing Leshy and Heket, just to somehow live. He's a coward, a backstabber, no matter if he feels bad about it afterwards or not. That feels ripe for a sin.

Shamura is weird too, not because nothing fits, but more because it's speculating about their past self. Their broken mind self is... well, broken. Love them, but clearly something changed about them.

Through the lore tablets in game we learn a young Shamura was the one who asked/threatened the older gods to bow to their old-back-then-new faith and began a war against the many gods with at least I presume, the other bishops.

Shamura is a god of war, of conquest, and probably even wrath back then too. Once again, it feels ripe for sin to have someone who seeks the blood spilled in the battlefield. Again though, that's speculations about a past Shamura.

Narinder is a bit easier again, since one can likely assume pride to be a good sin for him. Prideful as he tried to rise, he fell, and retained his high and mighty pride when thinking the lamb couldn't possibly ever stand up to them until being forcefully shown that fact of life.

And fall he did, like he usually does.

With all the bishops having "access" to a main sin source though (except leshy), they could have easily had a way to make their cults, their temples and more, stronger. In the game, we only upgrade the temple visually, but since a god grows stronger with worship, likely do their crowns as well, and it just helps feed that.

Likely a way of how the new gods Shamura and co rose up to power that much could be through this, though i have other thoughts for later dates too on that (and if Narinder was around back then, having the literal death god as your sibling probably helped in a war too-)

The crowns and their relationship to the gods of new and old need more exploring in general, I feel like. Not just from the game, but like, I want to see other people throw their totally-not-a-crown hat into the ring. Where they came from, how they work, etc.

Ramble times over, did this make sense? Probably not. But I like my randoms to an audience of mostly myself👍

[allastoredeer]

I was reading through your Pentagram City +Royal Family post when I noticed something. I don't know how close you want to stick to canon regarding smaller details, but you mentioned that Imp City is a district in Pentagram City. Imp City is actually its own city separate from Pentagram. The Pride Ring is made up of nine "circles" (a reference to Dante's Inferno) and in the Helluva Boss episode "Ozzie's" (i think it's Ozzie's anyway) you can see a billboard stating that Imp City is located in the second circle. Meanwhile I'm pretty sure Pentagram City is located in the first circle.

I did consider the 9 Circles, as I remember reading about it somewhere (don't remember where, thank you swiss cheese memory), but I was having a hard time connecting Dantes 9 Circles with the 7 Rings of Hell and how it all fit together. Like, it wasn't making a lot of sense.

I was trying to incorporate them into Pentagram City, but I couldn't figure out how. The city is already split up--if you're looking at the different colors and shades of each section--but that makes 11 sections in total. I took out the City Center/Heaven Embassy as one of the Circles, but that still leaves 10. Out of the five largest sections (I'm going to call them districts), we know at least 5 Overlords who run them (the Vee's in the purple section, which I call the Media District; Carmilla Carmine in the maroonish section, which I call the Weapons District; and the red section, run by Rosie, which is Cannibal Town).

I have it where all the Overlords run 1 of the 5 outer districts. The 5 smaller inner districts + the City Center are neutral zones. I thought about making the Circles each one of these districts (big and small), but there's 10 districts total (not including the City Center), so that still leaves one district unaccounted for, and if that's the case, then what does that single district represent? Is it just a blank spot? A vacancy? What does that mean for that district in contrast to all the other ones that represent a Circle?

In the end, I just couldn't figure out how to incorporate the Circles in Pentagram City in a way that made sense.

So I tried to expand them to the 7 Rings, but each Ring is already ruled by one of the Deadly Sins, which represents that Sin, and doubling up on themes (given that each of the 9 Circles also represents something, such as Limbo, Lust, Heresy, Violence, Treachery etc...), it just seemed like a lot. You could include the 7 Deadly Sins as one of the 9 Circles, as Lust, Greed, and Gluttony are already in in Dante's Circles, but that still leaves 2 out of the 9 Circles unaccounted for, as there are only 7 Rings.

You could have one Ring have 3 Circles, or two Rings have 2 Circles, but then what does that mean for that Ring versus the other Rings? What's the deciding factor for assigning each Circle? Do these Circles give a Sin more power? Does that Sin have more responsibility because they're also overseeing this Circle on top of their Ring? What's the purpose of the Circles at all? They each represent a section/factor of Hell, but how does that fit in with the Rings and the Sins, which already represent a section/factor of Hell?

So, if they're not divided amongst the Rings, where are they? How do you get there? I assume they'd have to use the big elevator that takes the Hellborn from Ring to Ring, so could it be that they're in-between Rings? But even then, if you divided them in between the Rings, there's only 8 spots, so where would the 9th circle be?

If the Circles are completely outside of the Rings, it still begs the question of how do they get there? There can be some magic-y handwavy teleport thing that could make it work, but we haven't seen anything like that in either Helluva Boss or Hazbin Hotel outside of Stola's book and Asmodean crystals (both of which are used to go to Earth) and Lucifer when he used his magic to teleport him, Charlie, and Vaggie off the terrace and back into the hotel lobby in "Dad Beat Dad" - but that's not something the Hellborn can do (that we've seen, at least).

I went back to find the billboard you mentioned:

So, I thought maybe the 9 Circles are the little dots around the pentagram, but that still makes 10 Circles. What would the tenth Circle be? Another vacancy? Another empty spot?

It could just be my brain disliking an empty space. Like, it's just there. It's a blank spot in the circle. I need it to be something, otherwise it makes my brain itchy.

So, eventually, I just decided to scrap the 9 Circles from my world-building. We may get more canon world-building from Viv and learn more about the 9 Circles and the 7 Rings, and how they all fit together, but until then, I'm keeping it to just the 7 Rings.

I put Imp City in Pentagram City because it's the most diverse Ring, and considering how much of a lower class the Imps are, I can see the Pride Ring the most likely place they'd be able to establish a little city for themselves. I also put them in between the Media District and the Weapons District, the first mostly for I.M.P's sake because I thought they'd like being so close to the Weapons District, considering their line or work; and the latter because Imp City being close to the Media District just makes sense. I can see there being a lot of job opportunities for Imps there (as service workers, doing grunt work, etc...), so it makes the most sense that the city would be between these two districts.

[rainbowninja00]

title pending!

so there's this idea that's been bonking around my mind for... years? I'm not sure how many but it's been a while. so, it started with the idea of characters based on the 7 deadly sins (original I know) and grew into a whole false tv show in my brain. first off, LONG POST WARNING!!!!!!! just letting yall know. second, there is some inspiration from Ready Player One here, if you haven't seen it, dw you dont need the context of the story, just the idea of a VR kinda thing for the internet, EXCEPT your body ceases to exist outside of it when you arent in the internet (tm) so no bullshit someone's gonna get you while you're in there! I can and will go into the intricusies of how the internet (tm) works but there are other things I wanna expand on. mainly, our main characters!!! there are 8 main characters: one for every sin and the protagonist. (some images included to show off the general vibe/colour palette of the characters all from pinterest) starting with our main character, she doesn't really have a name cause i cant think of a good one, but she's 14-16, new to high school and experiencing the internet (tm) for the first time, she's been online, but never in the actual world before. I like to think she wears mainly black and white with hints of red or other colours in the beginning and gains more colours as time goes on and she learns more about herself and the world around her. she is heavily inspired by moon girl from marvel's moon girl and devil dinosaur

next, Pride! she is the general leader of the group since she's the most commanding and takes no shit. she tries to keep the kid safe and out of trouble, she has her own in securities and such that I can go over in a stand alone post about the specific characters. she is kinda inspired by garnet from steven universe but only in a design way.

then we have the most developed and a literal self insert: lust! he's the resident "heart throb" of the group and is probably the silliest of the group, also the one the protag meets first. he is the insighting incident in many a misadventure cause its easy to use him for that. I will go into this more later, but he's lust cause he lusts for a relationship, he's a sad boy (like me) inspiration is angel dust from hazbin but only in personality.

envy and greed are twins, identical within the internet (tm) and fraternal outside of it cause oh yeah, the 7 are all real people too. they work together very well and put on a show of wanting what the other has to outside observers. the only inspo I can think of is the general aesthetic of grossology and mammon from helluva from a design stand point.

(pretend there's an image of a big ol oversized hoodie here, almost all those photos have people in them and I dont feel comfortable with that) wrath was one of the hardest for me to pinpoint initially, his thing isn't being angry, he makes others angry by being goofy and messing with them. Like kel from omori, also his design SOMEHOW ended up being cowboy esque in my head??? so like clover from undertale yellow.

sloth is actually my favourite, she loves hyperpop, all things pink and pastel, loves performing songs with lust, but she's sloth because she doesn't do anything unless it interests her, no chores, no responsibilities, she leaves the internet(tm) the least out of them all. I saw an artist on twitter once and was like YEAH THATS THE VIBE but I forgot who they are TwT. she is also based on moon girl design wise. BEE AND PUPPYCAT AESTHETIC MY GOAT!!!

(idk if this is fan art, if it is and someone knows who made it lmk)

last and sadly least is gluttony, I don't really have them super developed, and if anyone has any ideas for them I would love to hear it!

If anyone wants to see or hear more I will happily yap about it for hours, PLEASE I AM BEGGING ON MY HANDS AND KNEES FOR PEOPLE TO REBLOG THIS I just wanna know if anyone would be interested on hearing more so I know if I should bother typing up more posts on these guys! (also id appriciate help w/ the title)

[m0rbidmacabre]

One For Eternity - Chapter 2

Summary:

Dracopia returns home to his mansion, greeted by his loyal ghouls. He contemplates using a companionship locket to find love and companionship. However, his fire ghoul friend, Dew, advises against it, expressing concerns about free will. Dracopia understands and appreciates Dew's loyalty. Later, Dracopia performs a ritual with the locket, hoping for a faithful companion. Weeks pass with no results, and Dracopia sinks deeper into depression.

Notes:

Hey loves - Just a pre-warning this does get dark at points. so please do look at the trigger warnings, before reading and make sure you take care of yourself. The whole idea for this fic was to push it more horror focused... its one of my other favourite things and i hope you enjoy the build. Please remember that if you have any comments or things that you think might be interesting to add, you can message me here or at any of my other social media pages which are listed at the end. Id love to know your thoughts.

WARNINGS: Vampires, Vampire Bites, Alternate Universe - Vampire, Human/Vampire Relationship, Human/Monster Romance, Blood and Gore, Blood Drinking, Blood and Violence, Dark Magic, Depression, Implied/Referenced Suicide

READ ON AO3

Chapter 2

Dracopia moved through the woods thick and fast, silently, the rain and thunder beating down around him with every swift movement he took leading him closer to home. Darkness beginning to veil everything in sight, the loneliness of the darkness taking his very essence as he moved. He was tired, the fatigue beginning to take its hold on him, the travel had been long and made even longer by only being able to travel under cover of nightfall. He knew the closer he got to home the safer he would be, these mountains held nothing for miles... Just animals, maybe a few witches, more vampires, and weary travellers.

Arriving, he pushed open the heavy gates. The glow of the candles from the mansion lighting the grand gothic entranceway. The ghouls must be home he thought to himself. Most of the remaining ghouls that had stayed by his side were the ones that he was bonded to as a Papa, most ghouls lived for centuries, and he was happy to at least have some familiar scents around him. Since he became a vampire, having their company and knowledge had been invaluable to his survival and he was forever grateful to them for staying by his side. Still as loyal as the first day they had met when they were summoned from the depths of hell. His most loyal friend being Dew, a fire ghoul. Dew had been aging faster the last couple of years, but he was still full of his serious wit and stomping feet. There had been times gone by after his reign as Papa that Dew had saved his life. After his brothers had passed, it was unsafe to stay in the clergy. Vultures had destroyed it, picking at the bones of what they had left of the emeritus bloodline. Like all religions, his beloved church had moved into a money-making scheme that sucked the life out of its worshipers. Gone were the days when the dark lord was the true meaning of light and in had rolled an age of greed and gluttony. They had long put church behind them, although Dracopia still kept true to his faith. He was still a servant of the dark lord and that would never change, he followed his same old ways of ritual practice.

Opening the door, he saw a ghoul stood next to the glowing fireplace. The ghoul’s tail whipping around the flames in the darkness of its glow.

“Welcome Home, you look tired” Dew looked over at Dracopia and gave him a warm smile.

“Si, Si, thank you for reminding me of that Dew” he said running his hands through his sodden wet hair.

“I trust you found what you went looking for?” Dew asked.

“Si, I did.” he replied.

“You should rest, we can set up the ritual when you feel better, you should eat... You look like shit. There are some supplies in the kitchen, I went hunting for you.”

“Ah Dew, you do look after me.” Dracopia smiled a warm glow at the fire ghoul, his fangs appearing over his lower lip.

Dracopia walked into the kitchen and saw a skinned deer hanging from its rafters, before finding the blood Dew had stored for him. He poured it into a crystal glass and walked back through to the fireplace and sat down. The fire glow lighting the room they both stood in.

“So, tell me about your travels? I trust the witch was accommodating.” 

“Si, she was.”

He pulled the package from his pocket. “She suggested trying a companionship locket.”

Dews eyes widened. “You do know that once you use that thing that the person it calls. They will lose all free will?”

“Si, she did mention it. But what choice do I have Dew? My life is bleak.”

“You have me Dracopia, you have us... The ghouls, we are here for you.”

He swills the blood around in his glass... His eyes staring deep into the fire. “That is true my old friend, but you will not be around forever. The depths of hell will call you home one day, just like it has everyone else, I am doomed to an eternity of darkness.”  He sighed, taking a sip from his glass. He could feel his body rejuvenating, healing itself as he consumed the blood of the animal.

The fire ghoul stood glaring at him, shaking his head as if he were having an ongoing internal fight with himself.

“I do not think I can help you Dracopia, I don’t think I can help do that to another living being. What are we without are free will? Meer puppets unable to control what happens to our souls.”

Dracopia looked up and met Dews gaze, tugging a small smile to his lips “It is fine old friend, you don’t have too... your soul is clean and will be kept so. You have done so very much for me since we first met, I could not ask you to do something you do not want to do.”

Dews eyes lowered, Dracopia could tell he was feeling bad about his confession. He pulled himself to his feet and walked towards Dew, cupping his hand softly in his cheek... making Dew meet his gaze. “I said it’s fine, don’t beat yourself up.”

Dew sighed, retreating out of Dracopias embrace, leaving Dracopia alone to his thoughts. Dew never liked to think of what will happen when he passes on, but what Dracopia was saying was the truth. he would not be around forever, but he would not be involved in such dangerous magic... not even for his loyal friend who was so desperate to feel some kind of love and life again. There was a line he firmly did not want to cross.

Dracopia sat with his glass, savouring the taste of the blood he was drinking. He sat into the night watching the embers glow into ashes in the old fireplace, thinking about what he was about to do. The memories of his former life flickering in and out of his mind. He thought about a time when he had met a sweet sister of sin in the church, and the times in the autumn they spent laying in the leaves making love as the seasons changed. He could almost smell her now, lavender... Her curly blonde hair wrapping its way around his fingers as he ran his hands through it. He thought for a moment just how soft her skin was when he tended to it and how soft her lips where when he kissed them. He thought about her often, even now, but their love was doomed before it even had chance to grow, it had not been the right time for love, even though he had wanted it more than anything… His role in the church took centre stage and he ended up breaking her heart. Pulling away from her to make his role as Papa the most successful yet. Spending months and years away from the abbey would not have been good for them both anyway. No, she deserved a normal life... Not a life of loneliness like him. A life Dracopia could not have given her. What did he have to show for it now? Nothing. She was dead now, a life that had been fully lived, with a loving partner and children, recalling her sweet smile when he saw her walking hand in hand with her small children, her glow, her laugh as they she played with them though the abbey. He kept his distance after he had called it quits with her but seeing her like that always made him think… what if? And how it broke his heart. It was just another opportunity missed for him, all he had was his own darkness.

He pulled himself out of his memories and looked across the room at the package on the table. It was time he got this finished. He could not take anymore. Once Dracopias ritual was over, he could relax... and wait. His love would show themselves in time.

He walked over to his alter space in the living room and lit the candles, saying the dark lord’s prayer as each one sprung to life. Lighting a sprig of sage and placing it into a golden bowl in the centre of his alter, he went and retrieved the package, unwrapping it from its confines; the beautiful wood carvings brought back to life by the light of the glowing candles. He thumbed the wood in circles as he whispered “Dark Lord, I ask you to give me strength, I ask you to guide me, I ask you to take this locket and help it fulfil its purpose… I ask you to grant me a faithful companion” a small tear forming in the corner of his eye. he stood in silence with his eyes closed, taking in the smells of the sage and the candles, rubbing his fingers over the locket. He hoped this would be the turning point for him, that the dark lord would send him someone that would not need free will anyway, because all they wanted to do was be by his side for eternity. He wrapped the leather string of the locket around his wrist, making it into a bracelet and held the locket tightly in his hand.

—————————————

It had been a few weeks since Dracopia had done the ritual, he was starting to think that the witch had sold him an item that just did not work, or maybe he was just being impatient. His days dragged by in his own sombre lull, his depression deepening. He had thought about ending his life a few times since that night, starving himself into madness, denying his body the blood it craves, but his animalistic nature always took over and he would wake finding that he had lost control and wandered into the woods, killing an animal or human just to get what his body needed. He had woken on the floor of the mansion with Dew nursing him multiple times. His obsession had only deepened since he bought the locket, it was a constant reminder hanging from his wrist and that is what he wanted it for in the first place. To remind himself, to will this being in existence. Even if turning back now was an option, his mind would not have let him.

Dracopia had given himself some time out in the woods just to feel at peace around nature, to clear his head and often it worked for him even though all the scents of the forest often became overpowering to him and his need to hunt would grow the longer he was there, but he enjoyed the thrill of chasing down his prey in the darkness. So much time had passed now since he had been human, he wasn’t that anymore. He was an animalistic being, one that would hunt for blood, a need to survive and thrive in the darkness of time.

Finding peace for him is being in the wild... it’s quietness, it’s freedom. He lives for the moments that make him feel. This night was no different... he pushed through the woods at speed, weaving in and out of the trees in the darkness. His demons pushing him forward as at high speed. No sounds could be heard other than the call of wolves in the distance, until he heard it, A high-pitched wailing, the sound sending chills down his spine. He stopped moving instantly, His sensitive ears trying to focus on where the sound came from. Trying to home in on the sound before he makes the choice to move. He can hear the heartbeat and the fear in whatever it was this hellish sound had just come from and that was it, he was off.

The sound grows louder the closer he darts towards it, dread and tension filling his cold heart. He stops just before he reaches the source, hiding in the distance, in cover of darkness, trying to make out what was happening before he saw her. It was her! The one he had saved in Brasov. She looked different; something was wrong...  

Her eyes were blank, those big brown eyes that were once filled with so much life and fear were now saturated with malevolence and evil. Her eyes dart about in the dark, she seemed to be alone. He takes a step closer, a twig snapping at his feet. He looks at the twig and then back to the girl. Her eyes had already found him. She knew he was there; she had known the whole time.

Their gazes met and Dracopia came out of the darkness.

“Are you ok? I heard you, I’ve come to help” he said in a hushed low voice as if he wanted to make sure she wouldn’t be afraid of him, to let her know she wasn’t at risk of harm.

She just looked at him, blankness in her stare and she took a few steps towards him. Dracopia took a step back, letting out a low rumble from his chest. The look in her eyes was something he hadn’t seen before, it didn’t seem human, but she was human right? He saved her from those brutes. She needed him then, but right now she looked like she could take him out with a single swipe, and it scared him.

She took another step closer, eyeing him... her gaze and grin looking like a lioness stalking her prey. Dracopia took off, his speed no match for hers as she rumbles through the woods behind him. He tries to lose her, but she was somehow adept at seeing his moves in the dark and she continued to mimic him.

Another moment longer and she would have had him, if it wasn’t for the sudden arrival of Dew, who pounced on her from the dark, she didn’t see or hear him coming. His ghoul nature gave him the upper hand.  Dew bared his teeth and let out a growl and letting her know his strength. He whipped around her, thick and fast, his tail hitting the dip in back of her legs with force sending her to her knees and with one quick punch to her face, sending her into unconsciousness.

“What the fuck was that Dracopia? Who is she? Where did she come from?”

“I’m not sure, I just heard a scream, and I went to investigate. She sounded like she was in pain, that she needed help. I sensed her fear.”

Dracopia leaving out the fact that he had met her before, that he had saved her.

“We should take her back to the mansion, tie her up and find out who she is. It doesn’t seem safe to leave her out here like this… the look in her eyes when she looked at you Dracopia. She looked like she wanted to kill you”.

Dracopia agreed and the two of them set about securing her and moving her back to the mansion. Her dead weight was nothing for the two of them to move; she was small, and it took little to no effort for a ghoul and a vampire. Luckily their chase had led them closer to the mansion than Dracopia had thought which meant them moving her didn’t take long.

They tied her to a chair near the fireplace. Her hair draped down her face, blood dripping from the busted lip that Dew has given her. She looked like something out of a horror movie. She was scrawny, like she hadn’t eaten in days. Covered in mud and dirt, her dress ripped and ragged. She looked like she had been out in the woods for a while with no protection at all from the elements.

Dracopia watched her with great intrigue as she sat in the chair, unaware of what was going on around her. She was beautiful, even in her current state. He wondered if this was the work of the locket or if she had just happened to find herself here. He wondered what had happened to her after he left her in the bar. She looked like she had been through a rough time, that she needed some care, but he was mostly concerned by her actions in the woods.  She appeared to be out for blood, like she hungered for him.  

“Should we wake her?” Dew asked a low growl coming from his stomach.

“No, no... Let her rest. She looks like she needs it” Dracopia hushed.

[fatteningmenstories]

Benched - final chapter

‘What do you mean its been declined’

“Well, I went to my normal sales assistant and went to pick up my things, and he said the card didn’t go though, luckily I was carrying my Chase card …’

As Ajay went on explaining away his last shopping trip, a quickly forming reality was dawning on Devon - after all the fine foods, wines, luxuries, the funds were drying up. Sure by any means they won’t be going broke, but after a few calls and checks with his accountants the gluttonus lives they were living was not going to sustains it self for much longer,either they were going to have cut-back or they would quickly be in a whole new world

It had been a couple of days after his phone call with this manager, and Devon knew that him and Ajay really had no other choices of income, and Tom’s physio salary was definitely not going to be paying the bills for the townhouse . in fact after Tom moved in, Devon found that they were even spending more than before on his fine suits and expensive wines.

As he sat there in bed, ballooned in fat, he knew he was going to have to face his fears, and that started by calling up his manger

“Ah Devon, finally have you decided to make you triumph return to the team, after the season we’ve had everyone is desperate for you, Devon’

“Yh about that, Scott I am planning to, only I might be a bit bigger than you last saw me ’

“Ahh the off-season bulk - happens ti the best of us champ’

“Yh, bulk ha’ Devon couldn’t whip up the confidence to tell his old manger just how bad this bulk was over the phone

“Listen champ just come on down tomorrow, we get you sized up, I mean the whole team haven’t seen in for almost over a year now’

Today was the day, and Devon felt fatter than ever, leaving the house in the early morning in some of the only clothiers that fit him he knew as he had to catch his breaths after ever steps a walk in the park was gonna be off from this . They were all waiting for him in there, all his old teammates including Chad he imagined their faces and their ridicule and he hated that after living with Tom for the last couple of weeks he knew he was going to enjoy it all.

“I’m sorry mister, I think you have the wrong room’

Devon had walked in to the gym at the worst time, all his old teammates were shirtless running drills and workouts, and they stood Devon all 150kg of him , still holding a chocolate bar form the car

‘No coach, I don’t think I do’

“Devon…..”

The sound of weights from all over the room came crashing down as the herd of fit muscular men crowded around their hippo sized teamate

“Bloody hell’

“Is that, no way”

“Talk about an off-season”

“Coach listen, I did say I had put on a few kg”

“A few kg, is that what you call this’

Coach laughed as strolled over and slapped Devons fat gut

“I mean look a the size of you, you fat everywhere I look at you”

“What am I going to do you you fat sack of lard’

‘Hey coach, take it easier on him’ called a voice from the back

Devon dared not to look up, and he hated the fact a small part of him was loving Coach’s cruel remarks about his fat body’

But even he couldn’t believe who was strolling over to his rescue

Walking over, was a more muscular, almost taller Chad, it was obvious that after their accident the two had gone two very different pathways, Devon a spiral of gluttony and greed and Chad a rise of fame and fitness .

“What, else can I do, look at him this man was the comeback we needed Chad, I bet he couldn’t even get the kit over his massive backside, let alone make it to the field without breaking into a sweat”

“Coach, I know but shouting at him isn’t going to make it easier, anyway besides maybe even having him back is enough to turn our fate’ smirked Chad

Devon was shocked the arrogant areshole of a man that Chad had been had simply evaporated’l

‘Whatever, his contact his bullet prove, even if wanted to I couldnt get him of the team’

“We gonna be a laughing stock of the nation with this lardass’

Coach said coming and grabbing Devon exposed gut

“Hey it not like we arnt that already; chuckled Chad as he got between Coach and Devon

Coach had no words left to utter after that, he simply left in a strut leaving Devon with the rest of teammates, whom most got back to the training simply refusing to even acknowledge Devon.

Well one stayed - Chad

“Hey mate, thanks for that’

“Oh that that was nothing’

‘Nah it means a lot, and it seems like we both changed a lot these past years huh’

‘Yh I guess, not going to lie once you were of the team, and I had to step in I finally realised how much pressure it was, huh big guy’

‘Yh, I don’t even remember sleeping those days’

“You telling me, all I do is train, play and try to stay out the papers’

The pair of them, stuck together chatting about the past year as the gym quietened out, Chad hitting the machines while Devon filled him on his new life with Ajay and Tom.

“Wow you really enjoyed you time off-time huh’ smirked Chad as they made their way to showers, the rest of the team had left and it was the pair of them. Just like old times, they striped down and headed to the showers, Devon had barely even lifted a finger but he still stripped done to rinse off some sweat that came from standing about in the humid gym. Chad even helped remove his t-shirt when he struggled to get it over his fatty body.

Stepping in compleltey naked to the showers, there were never two bodies that were that different, Chads tall blond muscular body all toned up after a long work out and Devons round obese body covered in strecth marks and overgrown with hair.

‘I mean look at the size of you, talk about a transformation and a halve’

“Yh I living the good life, and I love it all’ Devon responded rubbing his gargantuan gut’

“Here let me’ Chad said as he took the soap and lathered Devon in it

It was all so sensual and hot Devon couldn’t see his cock as he turned to let Chad wash his back but he couldn’t feel it growing under his massive fat-pad. And it wasnt the only thing he felt as Chad got closer and closer to him rubbing all his back fat, the head of a fat big penis hit his fat arse. They stood in silence for a few moments until Chad broke the slience

‘Sorry about that, I can’t help myself you just so sexy’

Devon laughed, it seemed the more he blimped up men coudnt control themselves

‘Oh really, what’s so sexy about me’

“Everything, all over your just so big, I mean I used to stare at you in the showers and looking at this I couldn’t believe you could be so sexy, but now oh I can’t control myself’

Chad moved closer, his arms roamed over Devons body, taking it all in, they barely joined in the middle just the tips oh his fingers around Devons solid gut. And then he moved in, putting his face in the pillow of at that was Devon’s neck, and pushing Devon fat body to the wall and he entered Devons fat arse. They fucked for hours, long and hard it was as if Chad wanted one thing in the world and it was Devons well-fed body.

It was game day, and Devon was suprised it had all come so quickly, one the news had broken about his weight gain, the media went crazy, journalists and pappz wanted him more now than ever. The internet was filled with pieces comparing his body to its prime, everything was out it the open with his love life he was headed for being a proud gay footballer and jeered at by all sorts of sporting channels who loved to talk about his obese body for hours. He was a pneumpoan, everybody was - even Ajay’s lavish life, who had quickly become a minor celcberlity once the news broke, and now it was the first match of the season, no matter what the coach fought for he coudln’t get him removed, it was agreed though that due to Devons weight he was of course going to be no help on the field abs that all he needed to do was stand for the anthem and be Benched for the majority of the game. And so they he stood in a kit the size of tent in line with all his in fit teammates a bulging mass of fat.

The rest of the game he was sat on the sides, watching the game he even pulled put a chocolate bar as the 90min game bore on. As He looked up at the box and saw the large frame of Ajay next to a trim Tom whose hands of full of hotdogs and even appeared to be helping himself to one of two as a stuffed Ajay hesitated mouth full of ketchup and mustard. Devon chuckled to himself as he bit into the next chocolate bar that chef had packed. The game finished to a draw, which according to Chad was one of the best results they had finished in a while, Devon couldn’t believe it, had his team really fallen so far that a draw was an accomplishment. And as the rest of the team left and the changing room emptied out it was once again Chad and Devon left alone, and it seemed the sight of Devon in his humongous kit sent Chad awol, as after the final member left he couldn’t keep his hands to himself.

Coach was in trouble, it wasn’t enough that he had to put up with seeing Devon stuff his face with chocolate bars on the bench, after a lengthy call with the mangers his job seemed to be on the line, his teams poor performance over the last season was so distoruous ad campaigns seemed to back out with each loss and the team was heamorrgin money left right and centre , he had to do something quick.

After another game ended with another draw, Coach turned on the 10’ o clock sports new, most of the bloody focus was on the fat lump that used to be his star player, more focus went on what he was stuffing his face with than the game itself. After third draw of the season, Coach was hot headed, he didnt know what to do and right now he needed something sweet and the first thing that popped into his head was whatever he had seen Devon stuffing his face next to him on the bloody bench .But after 2 visits to two different supermarkets those damn chocolate bars seemed to all be out of the stock, after the third visit proved no avail he was furious

‘Oi you what’s the big deal, this is the third shop without any godamn chocolate bars where the hell are there all’

“Geez sir I’m sorry they sell out faster than hotcakes especially after matchs’

“What - the hell ”

“ If You asking me, it cus all those fatties come here straight after the game and buy us all out, its cus of the big old fat player Devon he’s like their hero or something’

What was that - everywhere he went to heard about that hippo and just when he felt another blood vessel burst in his brain an even better idea popped into his head

Devon dint know why he was being called in, Coach hadn’t even uttered a word to him all season and now he was being called in for a meeting- even Chad didn’t know what was going on

“Ah Devon, my favourite player come on in’

What was going on, but Devons attention quickly dropped when he saw the plates full of chocolates and pastries laid out on the table

“Why Devon, it seems your sweet tooth has caught the attention of some higher ups, meet the team’

They on the other side off the table were a large assortment of people some tall some with glasses all fat

“Listen bud, these guys over there will pay a hefty sum for you hands to be on they chocolate bars out there on the field - what’ya say’

Opening the envelope there concealed a number with a lot of 0s

‘OH and that’s just for one game’

This was it Devon’s money problems were solved for life and all he had to do was sit back and eat candy

Coach chuckled to himself as he saw the humongous man sign away his body with hand and grab a hand full of chocolate in the other, - looks like he had found a use fir this fatter after all

And as the season wore on that’s exactly what Devon did, it become a football phenomenon - viewship was at all time high. The fattiest of the country were glued to the screen seeing Devon pig out on various box’s of chocolates and sweets and they ran the fastest their fatty legs would carry them to the stores to pig. Coach had long forgotten about his money worries he had a golden pig out there weight his weight in advertisement - it was a plus that the team were playing the best they ever had in a long time, and leading them was Chad it was as if a big fat fire was lit under him and he wanted to do it proud. As the months draw on the team was quickly climbing the ranks faster and faster, until it was all down to for final game of the season .

There it was the last game of the season, Ajay, Tom and Devon boarded a much bigger limo to take them to the stadium than they had needed to at the beginning. . Other the past 9 months it wasn’t just the money on Devon’s wallet that grew but all three of their waistlines thanks to the replenished funds the three of them were back eating like kings, and it showed on Ajay’s much fatter gut Devon’s hippo sized arse and Toms beginning double chin. Devon had suspected that Ajay and Tom were having secret feedings sessions where Tom loved stuffing Ajays till he was too stuffed to move and was helping himself to the odd cake here and there . Seeing the pair of them across the limo Devon chuckled to himself as he saw that Tom was living the blissful lie that he had once lived as it seemed Ajay had found another young hot man’s body to ruin. Tom hadn’t noticed it but as he was stuffing food down Ajays food he didn’t notice his portions getting bigger and meals more frequent. Living with two obese men was definitely rubbing of on the poor PTs body, he hardly needed to work at the gym now that Devon’s money troubles were solved, his gym kit was growing dusty in the wardrobe just like Devon’s once did and the effects were beginning to show. A year of living with them was fattening Tom up faster than he could clock on, as he sat there next to Ajays the six pack he was proudly showed of was now rounding out into a beginners belly and his thighs were beginning to swell up. Ajays had of course taken the needed precautions of size up his wardroom secretly and reminding him of how fat he was at all times belittling Tom’s beginner gains

As the pair of them fiddled with each other in the back of the limo offering the other small treats and what nots , Devon didn’t feel any jealousy, especially after how he knew his heart was taken by another. What started of as after gym sessions soon bloomed into longs date nights with Chad, over the past 9 months Chad and rocked Devon’s world in more ways than none, filling up with food at dinner than fucking him like there was no tomorrow. And just when Devon was about to unlock some more thrilling moments the Driver honked - there had arrived

Devon’s role on the team had shunk to nothing more than a ballooned obese mascot that the camera would turn to when the audiences attention dwindled. And there was no other way he would have it, as the game wore on his assortment of snacks never ended he ate himself away watching Chad run around the field like he once used to. Except now he was a fat whale of man in kit that had long been upgraded to beat his ever growing fat gut

It was such a close game, 85 minutes had dreaded on, and there were still drawing 2:2, Devon couldn’t watch and so he ate - it’s as all down to Chad. And at the 89 minute, Devon scanned the field and saw the hunk of man that was he lover, and Chad saw back a fat blob of a man that he couldn’t keep his hands off. And just like that he kicked it in and it flew past the other teams goalie and went straight it.

And on that second after winning his first league, there was one thing Chad needed to do - and he ran straight to Devon and jumped on to the 180kg lover and gave him the biggest kiss of his life

And Devin thought to himself if this was life on the bench he would happily be Benched

The end

If any of you guys have any ideas for future stories lmk

[sweet-chimera]

"What if they kissed?" Mammon? >:)

Send what if they kissed, and i'll make a one shot, one off, possibly non-canon drabble of a smooch.

Being down here made the monsters skin crawl. Sure, there technically wasn't any rule about monsters being in the after lives. Some of them even worked with most of them, Cerberus guarded the entrance to hell. Banshee's delivered news of saints passing to the people of Earth. Even demons and angels were considered monsters in some religions. Quite frankly. There weren't rules about them being here because they, are to earth, what hellborns are to. Well. Hell.

And considering (for the most part) they had no souls, there was no afterlife for them to wait for to come down here. When they died they simply. Stopped existing or were recycled to make new monsters.

That all being said. It didn't mean that the chimera liked being here any less. It made her skin crawl, she felt like she was always doing something wrong being here. And hell was a finite space. There were only so many places you could go before you ran into someone you wish you'd hadn't.

And this was the first time she was waiting for Ollie inside the bugs nest itself! There were plenty of people here, and quite frankly. Honey looked like a Gluttony demon. Apparently they were multi eyes, multi armed, and pastel too. And her name? Its fine. Its fine. Just blend in--

"Oy? What do we have here?"

Of course, Mammon knew who she was, after all. He kept tabs on everyone who rented out his product. And with the monster specifically, he's been texting her pretending to be one of his prized robots. And she was none the wiser. Thank goodness that little lie detector ability didn't work through devices, hm?

Of course he knew when and where she was going to be. After all, he set up this meeting.

"Don't I know you from somewhere?"

"WHOOT? Me? No Ah doon't know ye, we're practically strangers, t'ats tae definition. Note... knowin' someone." Technically not a lie. One of the sins was one of the LAST people she wanted to be interacting with right now. Monsters got... a little funny. Around creatures of power.

Meanwhile, the kingpin of the greed ring was eating up watching the monster squirm. She was an oddity down here, a rare find, and what said greed more then having something that was one of a kind and limited edition?

"Ah'm just here. Waiting fer a friend."

"Waiting? All alone out here? A pretty thing like yourself?" He needed to turn up the charm. "A small thing like yourself? You're going to attract unwanted attention."

The monsters face twitched, her own mask dropping ever so slightly. "And... yer tellin' meh this just to be charitable?"

A toothy smile crept onto his face. "What? Here? Please, its bad business to be giving out help for free. Do you know what ring you're in? No, i'm giving you a warning." He bent down, he did have at least 8 good feet on her. "And it doesn't come cheap. The folks around here are paying you no mind because of me." Of course he told the staff to ignore her, and to make sure Ollie got out a little late.

"Me standing here and talking to you means you have my protection. And that goes a long way down here."

The pleasant smile and faux nervous demeanor dropped. Her arms crossed and clawless fingers digging into the muscle of her arms. She was practicing self restraint in the upmost manner. Pretty sure cursing out a sin lord, or throwing hands with one, probably got you thrown in jail down here.

"And whoot do ye want? A fiver? Some cookies? Out wit' it, fecker."

"Well, as long as we're both dropping pleasantries." He hissed. Pulling a neon lit cigarette out of his suit pocket. "I could have you banned from this entire ring. Much less from renting from me again."

"Whoot. Do. Ye. Want." The monster hissed back, pausing venomously after each word.

"I'm getting to it. Yeesh. You know patience is a virtue toots. People thinking you're running with me will get you far, not to mention it might as well be true with how often you're seen down here with my bots. I want a kiss."

"A WHOOT--"

Of course it was a bluff to make her squirm more. No sane person would kiss him. But it would have narrowed her options into saying yes to something more egregious. Maybe money, maybe extorting her, maybe information? Who knew. Knowing a creature topside that could travel back and forth freely wasn't an every day boon.

So Mammon laid on the pressure a bit more

"A kiss." The insect confirmed, he blew out noxious green smoke, from inbetween sharp, intercrossing teeth. "But of course. If it's a no, well then we're going to have to-- what the hell?"

His lips bent upwards in surprise. Eyebrows narrowing as he felt something around his neck. What was this? A plant!? Here? Coming from the chimera no less. The same chimera who lifted herself off the ground with more of them bulging from his floor. Making her an impromptu step ladder. With the combination of the plant hooked around the back of his neck. She used two of her arms to lift herself up, pull him down, and have their lips meet.

Plump white lips, met his more firmly disguised mandibles, her tusks making an opening inbetween for her tongue to dart through. This may have been the last person off earth she wanted to run into, but she had a reputation to keep! And as it stood, Mammon's tongue ran with the invite to invade her mouth. After he got his parings, the much sharper and thinner proboscis unfurled and probed around her mouth. Threatening to occupy her throat before he suddenly felt it sliding out.

The cold air hitting it was palpable considering it just hade the ecstasy of a warm mouth. Honey was already wiping her mouth by the time he put his insect like tongue away and stood up. Neither of them were bad kissers. Neither of them were going to give the other the satisfaction of knowing that..

"You. Just went for it huh? Something you not telling me?" He crooned out, trying to prod another reaction.

"Deals a deal twig man. Doon't let it beh said it woosn't. Now buzz off. Ah woont tae ferget tae past 60 seconds." The plants retreated, leaving only a loose floor tile in their wake as she walked around him, trying to compose herself.

Both from indignancy and just kissing someone 3 times her size. Pretending the people who were staring weren't. After all. She doubts that they'd gossip about their boss if they knew what was healthy for them.

"OLLIIIEEEE. OVERHERE."

Mamon only looked at her as she ran off and snuffed his cigarette. "Gnnn. FIne." Well played, he knows better next time.

[excessive-vampires]

Dealing With Demons Chapter 5: Hope This One's Interesting Part 2: Cee

Masterlist with CW

Taglist: @demyxdancer @softvampirewhump

"This complicates things," Avi said, looking at my Spotify profile.

Maybe it means they're willing to forgive you? I mean they could only have found it through you.

"Or maybe they were just curious and recognized your good taste in music. Now, I have to do an hour of business paperwork."

I groaned internally.

"To make sure I stay filthy rich."

I thought my acquiescence.

"So what podcast do you want me to put on for you?"

Have I mentioned how much I love that I don't have to pay attention to your boring ass business shit?

Avi beamed. They were proud of the system we'd come up with. Then suddenly they closed their eyes and inhaled deeply.

"A summons."

Guess the paperwork will have to wait. Hope this one's interesting.

That last interesting one I remembered was a woman who wanted one of every single issue of a certain comic book from thirty years ago. That had taken some investigative work. Deals were getting more and more rare, honestly, since Avi had refused to do anything too illegal for any reason besides protecting themself or punishing deal-breakers ever since we made our deal. It just wasn't worth the risk of ending up on the run from the law when they had a real life they'd lose if they did. But they didn't really mind the scarcity. Demons were patient, according to Avi, and for now they didn't need any more power to get what they wanted, not when they had me.

They blinked and suddenly we were in a dark room. Probably some sort of basement. It smelled like underground. Stale and damp and earthy. The floor was rough beneath their feet.

Across the room stood a person probably in their early forties. Short dirty blond hair tinged with gray at the temples Sinister smile, impeccably dressed.

Avi wore casual clothes. One of my old band t-shirts and sweatpants. Not even a bra. I felt self-conscious next to their soon-to-be client's suit. Avi felt frustrated that there had been no time to change. But if they don't answer a summons right away the summoner will eventually give up.

"You're not what I expected." The summoner's voice had a southern drawl to it, much thicker than my slight accent.

Avi looked down at their outfit and grimaced. "If you give me a moment I can put on some more businesslike attire."

"Not entirely what I meant. You have a physical body."

So, this summoner knew enough about demons to recognize possession. That was interesting, but not too unexpected. People tended to do quite a lot of research before selling their souls. I'd had only the one spellbook I found hidden in an alley to guide me, but I was in too much of a hurry to bother finding connections in the world of mages before making my deal.

"Yes." They beamed. "Isn't it nice?" They made a show of turning around in a circle.

"Don't you want a skinnier one? I mean, you're not a demon of gluttony." The summoner laughed at their own joke.

Rage bloomed in me, but also shame. It just goes to show, you never completely unlearn anything.

"Not. Interested."

The summoner shrugged. "No need to get angry."

"Now," the demon inhaled, searching the essence of the summoning spell for more information on the person standing before us. "Cliff Mason. Hi, I'm Avi, they/them. What do you desire?" We both wanted to get this deal over with as soon as possible, Cliff seemed like an asshole.

He grinned. "I have a plan. It requires one of each type of demon." He held up seven fingers.

Ominous.

"It will bestow great power upon everyone involved."

Vague.

"Uh huh, sure. Which lucky demon gets your soul?"

There was a slight pause.

"The power should be its own reward."

There's another red flag.

"Listen, I've kind of got my own thing going on, so find yourself another spirit of avarice."

"No! Having a demon that owns a body will make things so much easier! Now that I've found you I won't let you go!"

I don't know if you can hear this but there are warning sirens going off in my brain right now, Avi.

"Yeah, sorry, this sounds sketchy as hell. I'm out."

"Wait! No!"

With another blink we were back in Avi's apartment.

"That was weird."

Let's hope he gives up on whatever he's trying to do.

"Yeah, it sounds like he'll likely just blow himself up anyway."

I hope so. I got a seriously creepy vibe from him.

They walked over to their desk and sat down to start on the paperwork. "Don't worry, we'll probably never see him again."