#stop telling people how to have fun
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I personally find this a shit take. People made chatGPT and people choose to use it.
I'm sorry but people getting butt hurt about other people posting things on the internet that has nothing to do with them and hurts nobody is the oldest most boring reaction ever.
People write fic for free. If someone feels they would like to collaborate with an AI to do so they can do that. You can't stop them. Sorry.
I have used AI to help beta writing and fiction, it was helpful and what I needed in order to feel comfortable posting as a person living with dyslexia learning to write 20 years later than everyone else.
I also experimented with getting it to write a whole fic.
And it was the worst thing I had ever read. ChatGPT and other AI are still very shit. But as someone who has an obsessive neurotype I can't wait until I can get an AI to write me 20 versions of the same pairing and kinks, exactly the way I like it, because I've already read everything on AO3 for that rare-pair. That would be a dream. But we are definitely nowhere near that yet.
Even when I tried to get an AI to write just one chapter after I had already written 8000words as a starting block, I still had to rewrite the entire thing because it was failing to maintain internal logic and was just bad.
It was obviously written by AI because the grammar was perfect but the fic made little sense and was the worst fic I had ever read, including years of reading "this is my first fic"s.
I have been a visual artist since I was a child and every single piece of art I have ever posted here or anywhere else has been downloaded and reposted by others on other sites. When you make your work public on the internet people can and will take it and do as they please, including feeding it into their AI script.
I'm not saying that it's ethical, but getting mad about it is like getting mad at the rain. I hope you find it cathartic.
If what is happening is enraging you, maybe the internet isn't somewhere you can be chill.
Saw my first post with someone admitting they used chatGPT to ‘write a fic’ which they then shared here on tumblr and on Ao3.
To be clear, using AI to churn out a piece of fiction is not writing.
Using a bot (possibly one that was trained using a scrape of Ao3, that is to say, the theft of work from every writer who has posted their work on Ao3) is NOT WRITING.
It is theft. It isn’t creation. It’s a regurgitation of the consumed collective work and effort and heart and time of every writer who has shared their work on Ao3.
‘I’m not a good writer’ is no excuse.
Want to be a writer? Put in the time everyone else does to practice.
Don’t feel confident in your work? Open yourself up to the same vulnerability and risk that the rest of us do.
You don’t get to use a fucking bot to vomit out an approximation of a story and pretend you’ve got skin in the game.
The sad thing? This bot-assembled fic wasn’t bad. It was bland, but it had internal logic, some passing context to character and canon. It wasn’t like those early AI art pieces that had surreal compositions and extra fingers. It wasn’t immediately obvious it was made by a bot.
In this instance the person who posted it admitted they had used a bot. Which, actually, I have some respect for. But it probably isn’t the first and it won’t be the last.
I don’t know that there’s a solution to this, but it is both hurting my heart and enraging me.
#chatgpt#ai#fanfic#aifanfic#fanfiction#AIfanfiction#the internet#whenever I see a take like this I think “this poor summer child they have only just glimpsed the true face of the internet”#I for one welcome our new AI overlords#if we try to demand regulation for AI scraping I promise you the government that implement it will use it to restrict EVERYONE’S access#this is happening weather we like it or not#stop telling people how to have fun#stop telling people how to make art#just because you wouldn't doesn’t mean it bad#it's just not your cup of tea#oneday you will read a fic#and it will be the best fic you have ever read#and you won't even know it was written by an AI#using the culminating knowledge of all the fics humanity had written before#i think that is beautiful and transcendent#we build machines to do things we cannot#like flying#none of this would even be a problem if not for the capitalist hellscape we all find ourselves living in#Artists shouldn't have to fear homelessness or hunger because an AI can draw better now#obviously the solution is an UBI#or dismantling the capitalism entirely#it always comes back to capitalism
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original thief series basso & garrett :)
ngl, it's about quality over quantity for me. an npc can have a total of three minutes of screen time, but if they have a cool name, they can live rent free in my head and I'll spend several hours trying to decipher drawable features from a blurry screenshot of pixels
there is a vague hint of a story here, and that's because every time I try to play thi4f, I get incredibly frustrated with how Not Fun the game play is. like, is the story good? well. but it has a PLAGUE. that should've given it instant 'I'll replay this once a year' status in my heart, but the game play sucks so bad that I've never finished it. I can't believe Not Fun gameplay beat out my obsession with narrative plagues.
anyway, the idea is basically if the original era had a game with a plague centric narrative and some other stuff I liked out of thi4f thrown into a narrative blender, with a heavy dash of horror thrown in because some parts of the thief games were scarier to me than entire dedicated horror genre games.
⭐ places I’m at! bsky / pixiv / pillowfort /cohost / cara.app
#if i had a laptop and the skillset i would attempt a story mod because the thief modders who create whole mission stories#are GENIUS and also somewhat terrifying. love them! xoxox#anyway im actually kind of obsessed with parts of thi4f but its also like. not at that sweet spot of almost good enough to be fun#to talk about. which. for the record. has not stopped me from talking about it at length to people#the city itself actually fucking fascinates me. its almost alive and im SO mad that not a single part of that game is actually terrifying#it should be gnarlier and instead it feels a bit like it doesn't quite want to be trapped in the story it has to tell?#but between the level that has the bodies on the meathooks#and the scene with the bodies hanging from the rafters or whatever that was and garrett living in a clock tower#because the game is very much ALMOST about changing times and authoritarian violence and capitalism#(like. by virtue of how the story sort of spins out i think it misses it's mark on a lot of stuff here#in the sense that i dont feel like it actually wants to tell that story. it wants to. go in a different direction. or at least walk on top#of those themes instead of through it)#ANYWAY between all of those things. it does kind of live in my head rent free. they did create a compelling setting#SHAME THEY DIDNT WANT TO ACTUALLY EAT ANY OF IT#unrelated but i would've given thi4f a 10/10 if they kept garrett's fucking nail polish from the concept art. cowards. unforgivable#thief the dark project#i still have no idea how to tag the game series as a whole RIP#sorry for the dedicated dark project fans. if you know what the general series tag is. please let me know#garrett thief#basso thief
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In which Ford struggles so badly to relate to other people that he wonders if he’s really human at all. The more isolated he becomes, the harder it is to reconcile with his own humanity.
#my art#gravity falls#Stanford pines#ford pines#bill cipher#comic#eye strain#TIME TO DUMP EVERY ONE OF THE 27483949 THOUGHTS IVE HAD INTO THE TAGS BABY#OK!! SO!!!!#I feel like Ford would wonder why he and Stan (being identical twins) aren’t. yk. identical. shouldn’t Stan have polydactyly too?#as a kid he would dream about secretly being nonhuman and being whisked away to a fantastical world full of people like him#finally free of new jersey‚ finally somewhere he belongs#a lot of this disconnect from humanity came from utterly failing at social interactions while others (including stan) navigated them easily#the feeling waned after Stan was kicked out and he didn't have that direct comparison but it never left#then out in the wilderness of gravity falls‚ his isolation and immersion in Weirdness dragged it back up to the forefront#he deserves to have a breakdown over questioning his own nature. as a treat <3#color symbolism time bc I have a problem and use it at every available moment!!! blue and yellow get more vivid#the further from humanity the subject is#bill is entirely made w pure rgb blue and yellow (+ approximately 2674835 textures/layers/blending modes. I reached 150+ layers. help)#I like the idea that he would appear to ford like pure math considering hes a geometrical motherfucker and how the rest of the mindscape wa#I tried to mostly use trigonometry and related stuff for the Math Greebling. as well as fractals i love you forever fractals#MORE SYMBOLISM:#the grid-ish diamond pattern in all of the mindscape bgs (and elsewhere) is a penrose diagram of spacetime#which shows other universes on the other sides of black holes#SOMEONE ASK ME ABOUT MY EUCLYDIA HEADCANON LATER. IVE DUMPED ENOUGH DUMB HCS IN THESE TAGS ALREADY#BUT I THINK ITS VERY FUN#anyways. fuckt up guys n their egos influencing how they view humanity. bill tells ford hes as human as they come bc he was so easily foole#ford cant reconcile with his humanity bc of a failure to perform in one area#and then the immense guilt and shame over what hes done <3#I have So many ford characterization thoughts. no man nor god can stop me
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#i actually have no idea how this poll will turn out#voyage home is my favorite and i feel like a lot of other peoples favorite but idk#star trek#star trek tos#spirk#tos spirk#tos spock#spock#tos#leonard nimoy#i’ll stop posting polls when someone tells me to shut up#maybe#actually i don’t know that might just encourage me to post more#tmp is also so good it owns my heart#but voyage home is so fun and cute#when spock’s trying to learn how to cuss 🥰
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Artists on Instagram and tiktok and most other sites are the strongest people on earth because the comments are always fied with so many stupid people. I'd be murdering them if that was on my posts.
People have no idea what the fuck art is.
#for context: a bunch of people hating on someone for creating art in a fun way.#it was abstract art#the person in the video was just throwing paint on the canvas and they were using different objects to make interesting pattens and stuff#and the comments were just FILLED with people going 🤡“#like SHUT THE FUCK UPPPPP.#“i could do this too” OKAY DO IT THEN#ART IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUN. THE PERSON IS LITERALLY JUST HAVING FUN#also i hate hate hate when someone posts “bad art” on purpose and the comments tell them how their 3 year old child could do it better-#LIKE OH MY FUCKING GOD. SHUT UR GOD DAMN MOUTH. NO ONE CARES.#THE ART IS BAD ON PURPOSE. ITS THE ART STYLE. THE “UGLY” IS ON PURPOSE. ITS SUPPOSED TO LOOK LIKE THAT#ALSO. STOP BEING MEAN TO NEW ARTISTS WHO ARE JUST STARTING OUT TOO#LIKE FUCK DUDE#art isnt just realism and proper body proportions its literally whatever the fuck you want it to be#you created something and you had fun doing so? congrats you made art! doesnt matter if its good or not you made it!!! its art!!!!@@#idk people just have no idea what art is.#not every artwork is gonna look like a fucking monet painting
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Hello Mr Rat 🐀
Tell me (if you'd like to) about a story idea you haven't acted on yet? :3
I’d really like to write a chreon fic, like a raccoon city if it didn’t go to shit au™️ where Leon is a trans man, and moved there to get away from his small town and doesn’t plan on telling anyone he’s trans/he lives stealth etc. And then he and Chris meet and kinda hit it off, and Chris kinda makes his feelings known, but Leon doesn’t act on it bc Chris doesn’t know he’s trans. So Chris presumes he fucked up a bit and that Leon isn’t interested, but in reality Leon is just scared to come out to him and is very interested
Though I’d want it to be multichapter and slow burn? Because most trans Leon fics are one shots of him getting railed, and that’s fine I like smutty one shots as much as the next guy, but I think it would be nice to have something that’s longer? Though obviously it will contain smut bc it’s me writing it lol, but it would be nice to have it be multichapter and have plot, yknow?
That’s what has been on my mind on and off since the start of the year anyway lol
Thank you for asking :D
#I don’t want it to sound like I’m shitting on smutty one shots of trans leon btw#on a personal note a lot of them have made me feel better about myself#I just remember the anxiety of people being interested in me when they thought I was a cis man#and worrying about how to tell them#(most people did not care btw)#but idk would be fun to convert that into a fic hxhdhdh#rat stop using personal life experience in fics challenge: failed#ANYWAY thank you for the ask!!!#my asks
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#really loved this article#basically I’m sharing screenshots from almost the whole thing#it makes me so happy to hear how much they love doing the pod#it’s my favorite project of theirs#because it’s easy and out of drag and really showcases the real them#and that the magic is in their conversation & chemistry#without the drag and editing they’re still just two funny people we all love listening to them talk#so for Trixie to say it’s her favorite too and that it’s the project she’d save the most?#even saying it’s their ‘real’ show out of everything#oh we love to see it#also maybe it’ll stop people from speculating which project is going away/getting consolidated#let’s just say out of everything… it’s most certainly not going to be the pod#and thank god for that!#especially after seeing the live pod shows#you can tell they’re having so much fun#trixie mattel#tb&tb#interview!
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hot take, mike and el arent in love, because they are fourteen
well i guess mike is fifteen but still like as someone who has been fourteen/fifteen
GUESS WHO I WAS NOT DATING:
A. THE LOVE OF MY LIFE
B. MY FUTURE SIGNIFICANT OTHER
C. ANYONE WHO I WOULD BE ABLE TO SAY "I LOVE YOU" TO AND ACTUALLY FUCKING MEAN IT
D. ALL OF THE ABOVE (the answer is D by the way)
LIKE Y'ALL THEY ARE FOURTEEN
THEY MET WHEN THEY WERE TWELVE
"I knew right then and there in that moment that I loved you" MY ASS
#byler#mike wheeler#like i truly need to stress this so much this is NOT mileven hate like this is putting any like feature or fact about their dynamic aside#they are children#and yes i know there are people who meet their partners when they're young kids childhood friends to lovers is a trope for a reason#but no one NO ONE (or at least statistically very few people cuz i know my ass was not)#is making for real love declarations at Fourteen (or Fifteen humor me)#and “oh rey then how can you ship lumax-” LUMAX HASNT SAID I LOVE YOU YET#LUMAX IS THE MOST ACCURATE DEPICTION OF AN EARLY TEENAGE ROMANCE IN THE ENTIRE GODDAMNED SHOW BECAUSE THOSE MOTHERFUCKERS ARE SO AWKWARD#AND ITS ADORABLE#AND THATS IT#THEY HAVENT EVEN KISSED SINCE SEASON 2#YOU WANNA KNOW WHY??#BECAUSE THAT'S REALISTIC#BECAUSE THEY ARE KIDS AND KISSING IS GROSS#listen im not saying this with the intention that ohh kids are immature they dont know what true feelings are blah blah blah#kids have feelings no shit#but esPECIALLY when it comes to mileven it seems so goddamned performative#like it FEELS like they both just watched a bunch of romance movies and are now mimicking whatever they've seen the adults in those movies#(who are supposedly in love) do#like watch lucas's talk with max in the back of the like trailer thing where he tells her he wants her to stop pushing him away watch that#and then tell me mike's aMaZinG AnD drAmaTiC LOvE cONfESioN doesnt sound formulaic as fuck#like you wanna know how a teenager makes a love confession#they say smth emotionally vulnerable; want to die after saying the emotionally vulnerable thing; and then tell a shitty joke to salvage it#not “I don't know how to live without you. I feel like my life started that day we found you in the woods” no fucking teenager says that#and that is why lumax is as mr mclaughlin said himself: “real love”#damn i kinda cooked with the tags on this one#(also fun fact i learned that tumblr has a tag limit by making this post which is why half of the tags are at the 140 character limit)
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hellooooo sunset savanna event
not me just eating up the lil jamil crumbs (he doesnt even show up here)
also damn??? jamil CANNOT get a break. like kalim said there’s already a bunch of staff coming from scalding sands why do they still need the 17-yr-old college student 😭
you could argue he’s exceptionally great and capable at his job that’s why he’s still chosen to help but omg this poor guy just leave him alone 😭
dsfsd anyways this made me laugh (it was a note given to kalim by jamil) i love these two a lot
ALSO YUU AND GRIM ARE MATCHING AGAIN RAAHHHH
i actually havent seen grim’s cloudcalling ribbon??? so it was a really cute surprise when he showed up with it 🥺
“SURPRISINGLY NORMAL” “NOT STRANGE” BRO ARE THOSE SUPPOSED TO BE COMPLIMENTS OR???? 😭😭😭
i mean thank you to vil for calling us charming i guess even though it still feels a tad bit backhanded
aight back to the jamil torment
jamil you poor poor soul but this is so hilarious there’s just zero breaks for this guy
welp i finished the whole event in one go cant wait to see what’s next 😤
#dont know anything about what happens in this event tbh#but i’m not against spoilers if people wanna share#anyway cloudcalling on the savannah is such a nice en localization imo???#i keep messing up how to properly say tamashina mina so 😭#and lion man didnt come home but kalim did and that’s enough for me#kitty cat was too stubborn#[—✦ rambling#-✧ twst gameplay#tamashina mina#cloudcalling on the savanna#-✦—]#ALSO I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT THIS WITH YUUSHA AND JAMIL#HEAD. IN. HANDS. HELP#jamil’s out there doing work#and then he comes to find out kalim participated in the beads brawl???#when kalim was only supposed to be visiting????#like jamil already expected kalim to be there to just chill but also yuu??? (and grim) was there too???#AND theyre having fun this entire time while hes busy??????#im losin it.#also i cant tell when this event takes place so i have no idea what stage yuusha and jamil are in their relationship#either way someone (jamil) is left out#i love them too much ur honor
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ive been unhealthily fixated on kubosai for the past few weeks, i just have no idea how to put it into words. kuboyasu aren and saiki kusuo are in love btw
#they are.#been thinking a lot about t*rusai and k*bosai and all three of them together#(really long rant in these tags that shouldve been a rant post but im not changing it soz i got carried away LMAO->)#see the thing is that k*bosai is my absolute favorite ship ever. but i get genuinely pissed when people smack talk t*rusai#idk like i get why people wouldnt ship kbs and i really dont care. and i also get that a lot of people have differing opinions and-#wont ship trsai. i honestly cant wrap my head around why (other than people who just hate teruhashi and are misogynistic) but im okay with-#agreeing to disagree and i dont care yk??#but people so often make these long discussion posts just yapping and yapping and making up shit about how trsa 'wouldnt work'#and its always just... actual complete bullshit. like unreadable word vomit.#sorry. but its true.#thats why it gets me so mad#i cant think of a single reason why you would feel the need to do that#why cant you be normal and just. not like a ship. just dont like it. hate it even. but dont make up shit just to shit on it#its so dumb i have to force myself to just scroll past them every time i encounter one#usually on tiktok or tumblr#if i read them i wont be able to stop myself from making the most concerned and upset noises ever cuz what is actually wrong with you#theyre always the biggest dumbest stretches ever and they ignore their actual development and pretend it didnt happen#it just makes me wonder why people are so okay with making fun of that ship but get mad if anyone even dislikes theirs#and then they complain about people 'shitting on their opinion'#LIKE ?? NOBODY CARES THAT U HATE THE SHIP. I CERTAINLY DONT GAF.#but ur in the main tags advertising ur hatred for it and sounding stupid as shit for no reason? UR SHITTING ON PEOPLES SHIP ON PURPOSE#AND THEN GETTING MAD AT ANYONE WHO EVEN SAYS 'i disagree actually' IM LAUGHING SO HARD STOP IM KILLING MYSELF#the one time i ever talked in that much detail about why i disliked a ship was bevause somebody specifically asked me#and yk what ?? i have literally gotten death threats over it. im not allowed to hate that ship but everyone else can do whatever i guess#okay sorry. rant over.#is that controversial i cant tell. i dont really care and im not tagging anyway#meows post
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[TUVOKTOBER: Day 15] At First Sight. [Patreon | Commissions]
#tuvoktober#excerpt from the novel 'pathways'#tuvok/t'pel#Tuvok#st voyager#st voyager fanart#T'Pel#hey [vibrating from thinking about Tuvok - Vulcan Love & Gender Identity & Sexuality too much] -extends hand- chew through drywall with me#comix page#something about how Tuvok's identity is half T'Pel and has been for decades he's spent DECADES growing with half of him being a person#he's not just deeply in love with but literally IS. He literally literally /IS/ part of T'Pel and his children literally ARE a part of him#the SECOND he sees T'Pel Tuvok says 'Being with her isn't enough I need to BE her. NOW.'#that novel had barely anything about T'Pel in it but I'll forgive them bc what they did have (basically just this) ??? showstopping.#thinks about Tuvok alone on Voyager thinks about the unique and alien suffering#[shuddering breath...]ahgh...[cough]....h ey Tuvok!!! What're your PRONOUNS-#Guy who misses his wife who is also him#gu ys....[sobbing openly] g uys...he's INCOMPLETE without them.....#are you picking up what I'm putting down???#-chokes star trek writers- stop having straight people write alien romance. let insane gay people like me have a turn pleasepleaseplease#bea art tag#[switches out of angst mode for a second] also its SO fucking funny that in this novel's canon Tuvok didn't know about the pon farr until#it happened to him. he literally had NO idea what was going on. His parents didn't tell him. Why?? Don't believe in sexEd???#it really made me laugh. conservative coded...#drawing elaborate Vulcan head....things? headresses? is fun <3#suggestive cw
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oh so alisaie’s exaggerated bully behavior is 80% fanon. saying this she casually picks up a large rock
#say one thing wrong to me and you will have a wonderful few days with the rock#if angry silly girls have 100 fans etc if they have 0 fans i have died#sorry i saw a YouTube meme i vehemently disliked on principle and got mad at the only child behavior-#kipspeak#she is just short tempered and uses anger to mask other more ‘shameful’ emotions!!! alphy did the same thing with just deciding not#to express them. which is still not good and I think why he breaks and ends up teary so often now#this shortness does not translate to actually being mean to people. she only uses being mean as a shield for herself and being snarky#Is just fun for her. it’s fun for Me. you have to inconsequentually tease people or they’ll never learn to laugh at themselves#the twins and thancred 🫵 do this thing where they have big emotions but they don’t want anyone to SEE they have big weird emotions#so alphy pretends he doesn’t have them under a veneer of dignity and alisaie pretends the emotions are Something Else. thancred is#just so emotionally constipated he has trouble expressing anything. he’s got enough baggage for a flatbed#anyways. alisaie is such a compassionate and kind girl and she learned how to make snarky jokes and went ham. and she hates appearing sad o#weak or vulnerable so she blocks it off with an unapproachable emotion so no one pities her and they maybe get on with the plot#it is in fact also great at getting ppl to move away from the sad or embarrassing topic. even if the tradeoff is being more offputting#she would never (grabs youtube meme) she would never seriously bully her brother. this is sibling ribbing only. Cain instinct#just leave her be she is learning how to snark humor and she loves it she loves being sharp. alphy has wit he just keeps it close#my brother didn’t learn how to tell or receive a joke until he was 14 he took everything so seriously. he can do it now though and he’s#HILARIOUS. Don’t tell him I said that. my man knows exactly where the funny points are even if he hasn’t learned when to stop yet#too many tags. Whatever. jokey snark alisaie who sometimes compliments is happy alisaie grouchy snappy angry alisaie is way too stressed#very easy way to tell between the two. even alphy can tell between the two I believe! He tends to rib back in protest if they’re having fun#and try to stop her if they’re not having fun. case in point ‘what is that supposed to mean?!’ vs ‘alisaie ryne was only trying to help.’#I know they’re twins but that’s such an intensely older sibling thing to do that it reels me#LONG TAGS AND THREE EDITS TO ADD ON SHORT I resent this stereotype taken too far into ooc behavior. it happened with nya#It will happen again and as a postscript let me regale you with Things U Can Notice About Character Motivation and Actions—#I’m not done let me s#she and raha are friends now I decree. ‘haha you like me’ SPUTTERING PROTEST FROM BOTH
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Fandom: DCU (Comics) Rating: Explicit Warnings: Underage Relationships: Tim Drake/Dick Grayson, Dick Grayson & Damian Wayne, Tim Drake & Damian Wayne Characters: Dick Grayson, Tim Drake (DCU), Damian Wayne Additional Tags: Omega Dick Week (DCU), Omega Dick Grayson, Alpha Tim Drake (DCU), Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Reverse Robins, first heat, Tim Drake is Red Hood, Dick Grayson is Robin, Damian Wayne is Nightwing, Porn With Plot, Mildly Dubious Consent, Degradation, Multiple Orgasms, Knotting, Bratting, Dirty Talk, Begging, Pre-Flashpoint (DCU), Dacryphilia, Overstimulation, Batkids Age Reversal, Imprinting Summary:
Dick doesn't expect to have his first heat like this. He doesn't expect to have a first heat at all.
But when he presents around Tim Drake, the Red Hood he's been clearly warned to stay away from, he imprints on Tim and Dick will do anything to be near him. Sometimes, flirting with danger is worth the price.
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Omega Dick Week 2024 - Day 1: Reverse Robin | First Heat
#omegadickweek2024#necrotic writings#timdick#ao3 fanfic#batcest#fandom event#i don't usually crosspost my fics bc that's too much work#but since i'm doing omega dick week i'll be posting all of the fills here for like. purposes#so!!! huzzah#figuring out how people format these was a pain in my ass I'll tell you#this won't be added to the masterlist bc I'll be making a separate masterlist for omega dick week so just hang tight for that#almost every day is a different ship. which is fun enrichment for me#that said i've written 20k in two days for this so i'm not sure i'm well.#if i don't finish on time i WILL finish during catch up week i swear to god nothing will stop me from completing it#i should've started it earlier though#i am powering through with a vigor i did not know i had.#i've frightened my partner.#having fun tho#i need to eat i think.
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sometimes people who struggle like to make jokes or find positives about their condition that causes them to struggle so they can escape the constant negative and struggle. sometimes autistic people will say things like "the 'tism" or use the "autism creature" or say their autism helped them have a *positive trait* to feel better about their struggles. because living your life only focusing on the struggles and negatives is depressing and makes it hard to want to live, even if those struggle take up 100% of your life and you can't actually escape them. sometimes any little seemingly positive thing can help a lot.
but there's so many other autistic people that hate when we do that and call it "reducing autism to a cute trendy thing" and say it takes away from *their* struggles and is bad and shouldn't be used. maybe *you* want to only focus on your struggles, but some people can't live in constant negative and need some positive or to find ways to make their condition more positive so they can feel better about living with their struggles. life is hard. I take anything I can get.
I cant get jobs. I can't make and keep friends. I can't get help and support for doing "normal" things so sometimes I go weeks without being able to shower and without eating more than a bowl of cereal a day. most times can't even do things I like. struggle to communicate. have meltdowns. i'll never be able to live independently. I struggle a lot. but instead of sitting here always depressed and having no motivation to live, i'd rather try to joke about "my 'tism is acting up again" when i'm struggling (just an example. don't think I ever actually used the 'tism thing but i saw others use it) or say "i'm just being a creature" when I need to stay in my dark room because everything is too much and I personally find it cute to be a little creature meant in a positive way. i'm not actually downplaying mine or anyone else's struggles. I still acknowledge them and that silly jokes dont make them go away. i'm not trying to be trendy. i'm not doing any of the things people say we do by making silly little jokes. i'm using the silly little jokes to convince myself life can be a little more than pointless, painful garbage all the time.
(continue in tags)
#dont know why continuing in tags but here is more#sometimes we need to ask “why” and not just get mad about how we feel personally. because other people feel differently#yes im guilty of only thinking my feelings and situation and how it relates too and forgetting other peoples. i also need to learn#and everyone's feelings should be valid. just because something might “hurt” you it might be important for someone else#everyones feelings are valid. but we cant protect everyones feeling. so idk the solution#but stopping someone from having a small positive among a sea of nevgative seems a little mean to me#youre not being empathetic to their side. and i can turn it around and be not empathetic to your side and say stop being upset#and get over it and let people have fun. but i wont. i hear you. but at the same time maybe hear us too.#not everyone wants to live only negatively. youre allowed to but dont expect others to.#and yes i GET IT these things can make the allistics and neurotypicals be even worse towards us. but what do we do?#throw out any positivity we can find and grovel in our struggles because the allistics wont take us seriously?#DO THEY TAKE US SERIOUSLY WITHOUT THOSE SILLY TRENDY THINGS? NO! THEY NEVER HAVE#like i said i dont know the solution and everything still be used against us by those people anyway so might as well have fun?#if we focus on struggles they baby us and dont let us do things and block us from living life#if we focus on positive they dismiss our struggles and try to make us do what we cant and dont help us#we cant win! so its not “the 'tism” or whatever other things people made up that cause them to act this way#they already act that way and wont stop unless we figure out how to teach them! but i dont know how! im just a useless little creature#this is probably controversial and someone will get because i dont agree with their perspective despite respecting it#someome will comment to lecture me even though i get it. i do. but two things can exist at the same time!! idk what to tell you!#autistic#autism#actually autistic#lee rambles#words are hard so dont know if i worded it well or not. probably not#also why take away fun things because another group used it for bad? make them stop the bad not stop the good!#i also might be missing more context. i think is about tiktok using these for bad. tiktok is just bad in general and i refuse to use it#why tiktok dictate and ruin our lives now in general? tiktok is really bad 😂 but that another conversation#no one yell at me and say i dismiss struggles of struggling autistics. maybe you dismiss me needing negative thing to have positive?#not in mood for negative response. will probably cry fhhddhsjdjdjkd#today is real struggle day but if i be little creature i feel better
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Hi your sleeping in the same bed RWRB fic is the most in character that I’ve ever read and it was so lovely! You nailed that! Thanks for writing it :)
omg this is so kind of you to say!!! thank you so much, I really appreciate this!!!! thank you for reading 💛💛💛💛💛
the fic being referenced :)
#fic love#anon#asks#answered#you have no idea how absolutely garbage i have been feeling in recent weeks and frankly months about writing ajsdklfjalsdf#so this was really nice to hear thank you#just feeling low and awful in a lot of ways and it's really#sucking the joy out of this one thing that should be fun#and i think a lot about legacy and impact and i wonder what my place and space is sometimes in the grand scheme of my career/writing#and having so much ambiguity in other spaces of my life makes writing the ONE thing i have control over#so not feeling good about it means i have#literally nothing going for me at the moment jasdfkljalsdjflsadf#i never know how people perceive me or my work#i rely a lot on other people telling me explicitly how they feel about me or my writing#which is obviously dicey as fuck because#that's not a measure of self-worth#and i am the FIRST to tell people that words =/= worth#but right now i am working extra hard to remember this#the itchy feeling persists#but we continue to persevere#won't stop me from writing and posting#anyway sorry to DUMP in the TAGS like a FREAK but#thank you <3#this means a lot
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now i’m getting up and leeeeeeavin
#weezer#rivers cuomo#i can’t tell who that is lwk#someone please tell me#AM IN AP PHYSICS#update am on the bus now bc my teacher was talking and i forgot i was posting.#it’s really hot right now in california; today it os#93!!!! it’s so hot and i have to walk a bit frommmy stop to my house so it really sucks but it’s okay.#anyways my physics class is like. weird idk how to explain#my teacher; even though he’s nice; talks a LOT which is bad since i’m bad at science and need all the class time i can get#i’m sorry mr chang i don’t care too much about how you were in soccer as a kid#LIKE TEACH ME PHYSIXS KING.#he does science olympiad so maybe i’ll ask about joining ?#that could be super fun! i’m gonna really try my best in that class#i really want his letter of recommendation; but he’s only giving it to the top 4 people in his class! i’m so worried but it’s okay.#IVE GOT THIS.#anyways my tummy really hurts#idk what’s wrong with me; maybe i need to eat better but it just makes me feel bad :(#it okay.
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