#somehow made this !! wasnt even thinking actually
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befriend the chaos within.
vent or smth idkk
#i'm in my mcyt drawing obsession again guys im back#felt bad#im mainly focusing on driving as i have a driving exam really soon !!!!!#im working on my etho and cleo designs rnnn will post them tomorrow or the day after#bye bye artblock yayy#somehow made this !! wasnt even thinking actually#art#oc art
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Yeah we've already talked about how outright stupid the lore n writing for modern Doom is, but tbh I can understand why they had to do something with Doomguy, why they had to make him The Specialest Boy instead of Just Some Guy. Do I like how they did it? No, I would've taken it a different direction. Do I think that hugo could've done it well even if he took it in the direction I would've? No, I have minimal faith in his story writing. But realistically, how many times can a guy singlehandedly accomplish the impossible before you have to acknowledge he's very much not Just Some Guy who happened to be at the right place at the right time? I think that, with how every single other person on the Phobos UAC base were killed in Doom I, doomguy stopped being Just Some Guy the moment he decided to do anything other than just lie down and die.
#pikspeak#im sure this is old news what with eternal being 4 years old now but. idk ive been thinking abt it.#i dont like the 'you were a chosen one from the very beginning!' trope too much#makes it feel a little like what the character actually does doesnt really have any significance#like if they were the chosen one who was going to win from the very beginning then why does it matter.#its the whole free will vs predestiny argument and. idk. i just think it could be done better.#no modern doomguy cannot be just some guy anymore but. it couldve been done a lot better. let him have been just a normal guy who had the#option to be normal and die but chose not to and through his own actions made himself significant#then again. maybe it wasnt the moment he didnt stay down that he became significant. i do like the idea of blazko having something to do#with it. i do like the idea of blazko having picked up the spear having something to do with it.#but still. 'youre actually a god and you were going to be this powerful Always' is just. not appealing. let him have some influence in his#own power. u dont even need to take the thing w the divinity machine out. just make him a separate entity from davoth instead of davoths#clone/destined counterpart. let dg make the decision to rise to davoths level instead of saying he was always there from the beginning.#sigh. i couldve written eternals story so much better. and yet. somehow i am still repeatedly drawn back to it. sighing smh.
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......... who's gonna tell him ... .. ill do it @markiplier
#IM KIDDING ALKJNFGADFBG IM SORRY MARK BUT YOU'RE THE ONE WHO NAMED THIS PLAYLISTTTTTT#actually you know what on the slim to none chance i submit this at Just the right time and it gets a bunch of notes#and he somehow does actually see this post#(hi sappy/backstory tm incoming feel free to continue scrolling lmao>>)#mark you helped my mom so much#she was sick for 5 years and in that time as she got weaker and more tired what she had an abundance of was Time#and as someone who since losing her has now also become extremely depressed i underrstand Even More how horrible that kind of Time can be#to have and go through and be frustrated and devastated and bored out of your mind#but some of my friends started me in watching your videos#and she was my best friend#i shared everything with her#so of course i shared your videos too#and we would watch a lot of them together but you also have so many on your channel from so far back in addition to the new ones#that she had plenty to go back through and watch on her own while i was at school#we always felt like your humor and mentality fit right in with the rest of the household like you were a longtime friend#or neighbor from just down the road who we spoke with regularly or smth idk it was just so easy for your videos to be engaging and upliftin#she could have a playlist on to fall asleep to and be distracted from everything coming up...and that means more#than i could ever begin to thank you for#i think fnaf had been one of the things id been introduced to you through..and then tiny box tim we loved tiny box tim#back when you were first getting into making shorts and improving equipment/editing quality i always thought it would be so cool#if we somehow ran into one another on the street somewhere and i could offer to help#because i was watching those videos too! i want to make them as cool as possible and im going to school for it i know tips and tricks#and by now im sure youve probably surpassed what i know haha the INSANELY awesome and frankly gorgeous cinematography and impressive#but anyway... i know she had those videos to fill the Time when i was at school#and sometimes when i wasnt but when i was too exhausted#and i know you made her laugh and smile through it all#and that means everythingto me#ok well thhat got sappy fast sorry everyone christ#ive thought so many times over the years about trying to write something in the comments on a video or send an email or something and like#i feel bad same time cos i know soooo many people have similar stories or treat youtubers/celebrities like theyre actual saviors and angels
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Also another thing that’s fucked up is that my parents told me to not be outwardly angry at school because then someone would call like the equivalent of CPS in Canada, genuinely don’t know what it’s called, and take me away. I being like. 12. thought “yeah no seems legit” or more accurately, “i don’t want to get taken away from my family.”
And then, and then, this other time, when my dad just fucking left, we were talked to by a person from I guess the Canadian equivalent of CPS and I, even though I knew it was wrong at that point, kept my mouth shut. My mom told us to keep our mouths shut. And my sister didn’t, she told them and they did nothing.
Thinking thoughts. Having feelings. Idk.
#landscaping your mind chapter one#like what the fuck.#what the actual fuck.#i should probably make a tag for this lol#the last post wasnt a vent. i shared an anecdote and connected it to a problem i see#this post is a vent. i’m saying ‘what the fuck’ over and over in my head#somehow it’s very hard to deal with trauma when you’re actively living it. who’d’ve thought#/s#i want to leaveee#and yeah it’s like ‘kris just tell a teacher they legally have to report it’ and?? i don’t have citizenship im a dependent and most likely#they’ll just talk to my parents and decide theyre fine. bc they’re nice a lot of the time#most likely my parents will get angry at me even more for reporting them#and hey! when i told the councillor that my mom hit me in 2021 she made the call to kids help and they said it wasnt big enough#this was… before they hit me more. this year. yippee /s#i just. im so hashtag jonathan sims coded. there’s a way out. there’s a way out but i don’t think i can take it.#there’s a way out but i’m afraid. there’s a way out but this is the only life i’ve ever known. they’re the only parents i’ve ever known.#i love them. i love my sisters. i just… i have to wait for a better out#hey! at least i have an end date for this!#18th birthday babyyyyy#(pls dont be concerned im fine)#vent#child abuse#tw child abuse#cw child abuse
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Have you ever been assumed to be romantically attracted to someone and even just the thought of that makes you want to throw up . Anybody
#had someone's husband in my dms going on about how i want this bitch romantically and frankly if i hadn't been so busy crying i would've#actually thrown up . absolutely disgusting idea . vile even . horrid concept#anyway tldr im down a best friend because he didn't tell me anything i was doing was wrong after telling me that everything was okay and#then sent his husband after me to call me a creep that was obsessed with him that also apparently tried to make out w him#the same trip that my best friend of five years told me he hated having me in his hometown to see him graduate.#this was after i found out my cat had been murdered and mutilated and thrown in my granma's garden . that day happened to be my birthday#because my ma was kind enough to drive me and my lil brother down there to go see him graduate bc he was also supposed to move in w us the#month after . and he told me right after i got home that he 'didn't think it would be good for our relationship' and apparently#just didn't know how to tell me until a month before it was supposed to happen . bonkers times over here#anyway i didn't want to make out with him . he cried after i wouldn't have sex w him just last december . which i specifically got high as#shit to avoid . and i dont even have like. actual examples of what i was doing wrong to go off of so now i just get to live in mystery#forever ig. like shocker that the person that's been my best friend for five years would tell his husband to say that to me and not say that#shit to me himself . this is a wild to me . i feel like im going insane . can anybody even hear me what's going on#you know its bad when your mama gets so sick of you crying over a friend that she hugs you for the first time in years#also i cant sleep my head hurts . crying is evil . devils liquid . might watch rpdr or something . still nauseous over the idea of being#into him romantically btw . like still nauseous over that . like what a fucking insult to our entire friendship#does saying that we may as well have been made of the same atoms mean like . nothing . does nothing ive said to or about him not mean anythi#ng if its not romantic in nature . what did i do that wasnt enough for him. i fucking told him he outgrew me and that was fine i just#wanted to know if we were still friends or not and he said we were and i believed him. if he told me the sky was green i would make it so#ripping my hair out . am i being dramatic . am i the only person that wasn't expecting this . am i the only one that didn't know#when i had to tell people who knew about the moving plans that he changed his mind the first fucking thing i was told was “i thought it migh#t happen.“ WELL I FUCKINH DIDN'T . AND NOBODY TOLD ME#this is like . the second most humiliating moment of my life . aside from movinggate because at least nobody irl has to know about this#anyway . this boy could've taken my blood and i'd sit there and smile while he did it because he was my best friend .#i was so glad we got to grow up together. i miss him already. im taking my little brother to school my myself for the first time and all im#gonna wanna do is tell him about it . im tired . i want to sleep . im still so nauseous . did none of it mean anything just because ive#never and will never like him romantically. does that make everything less worthy somehow#i hope he never talks to me again. i dont think i could handle this again. he let is fucking husband say that shit to me. not him.#puppmeo misery
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im soo glad towns square is back i can hit people with hammers <33
#loove doing the quiz im like top 400 rn. lol.#while waiting to start i just go stand behind people and hit them with my hammer. somehow it is funny every single time!!! /gen#and when im waiting during questions i pull out the little watering can and water the borderr its so funn#mann either this morning or yesterday evening i was waiting for it to start and saw someone also hammering away (at the ground this time)#so ofc i joined em and not a lot later literally the whole lobby was hacking and hammering away in a straight line it was awesomeeee#waguhhh.....#sillyposting#AND i think yesterdayy maybe i stuck to someone and we send stickers to eachother and for like 5 lobbies after another we were togetherr#lobbies dont continue so it was pretty lucky but ig it also wasnt busyy#BUT ITS SO FUN. waugh maybe i should look into having friendss#whats not so nice is that i cant click on them to go to their profile so ive gotta search em somewhere else and i dont have russian keys T-#it was so upsetting when i went to get lunch T_T we will meet again surely....... it will be destiny......#i like this game =w=b#WAIITTT ok someone i was playing with send me a friend requestt!!!!!#when i tried to send them one they were full but ig they made space!!!!#will i finally make friends?? waughh no way.........#i actually send them text messages this is awesomee =w=bb
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I wish that I was more
#sad hours at the huskin bee#personal#graduating soon and the animation department is collecting photos of everyone in the drive#and seeing all these group photos of everyone in the program makes me realize how distant i am from them#and how close knit everyone else has become...#ive never been good at making friends and within like the first few weeks of school it was like everyone got to know each other#and the few friends i made in the program left after the first year#i wish my social anxiety wasnt so bad i tried harder to make friends in college#also i have an essay due on monday and i might just not do it#or itll be really half assed#ive been doing well so far in that class so if i dont do it i think the least id get is a C#idk maybe i can still make friends w these ppl after college somehow but itd still feel weird bc i had a completely different shm experience#than they had#ahhhh#i can imagine a future reunion where ppl will talk to be about old drama that was big among this giant friend group#that consists of most people in my year that ill have no idea what theyre talking abt#bc im never in the loop abt anything ever lol#this actually happened at my hs animation reunion except i actually knew and talked to most ppl in that class#i wasnt like super close to most of them but i had a few closeish friends#and i know one of those friends probably werent/arent in the know#also like i did hear abt relationship drama back in the day bc gossip spread p easily#anyways i was told completely new information abt someone getting stalked back then so thats wild#and apparently there was a super handsome guy in our class that i for some reason have zero recollection of#point is i be the last person to know something and if i know smth then everyone probably already knew#which is annoying. i wanna hear gossip too. even in my own family my sisters will tell each other and our mom about shit that went down w#their friends or our cousins and i only hear abt it when im in the room#so i end up hearing a lot but never directly and sometimes not in full#man i shouldve gone on more college field trips#shouldve done a lot more in life that my insecurities get the way of#tbh i genuinely think i might have a form of undiagnosed anxiety; tism; or some other mental disorder
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reading the desolations of devils acre and idk man im not tly feeling it
#i think the whole prophecy thing has thrown me off its just so like. idk its kinda generic. like wow there r 7 who will help seal caulagain#also i like noor i think shes rly cool but it still feels like shes barely.. been here#the wiki lists her as a deutoragonist but like. idk. it rly doesnt feel like that#this is not me saying i dknt like her its like. the opposite. i think shes rly cool so its disappointing that she isnt rly fleshed out at#all... and it just Irks me how it went from being abt. jacob and his friends and his girlfriend emma (even tho he focused on her a lot it#felt balanced) to like. the jacob and noor show. while still somehow having noor feel very flat??#like. theyve made the entire story revolve around her and how jacob loves her and somehow shes still like. not well thought out.#it feels like maybe he was like hmm maybe jacob and emma shouldnt be together. and then judt rushed jacob inro another relationship#literally like a week after they broke up and he barely knew her he is just like. acting like hes known her for forever. IDK#I SOUND LIKE A HATER ONCE AGAIN IM NOTTT I LIKE NOOR IDM JACOB DATING NOOR IDM JACOB NOT DATING EMMA ITS JUDT LIKE.#it feels rushed. and i like noor so i wished there was more time with her#And i think the prophecy plot is so incredibly lame. ik everybody and their mother has a prophecy plot in their ya book but its -_-#it just feels like there were a lot of interesting ideas like the peculiar clans in america and a secret clan of normals still hunting#peculiars and Literally all of that was thrown out the window and actually the elite clan of normals was just wights and the clan conflict#ended in like. 1 page. and theres been no mention of it since lol.#IDK. idk. I LIKE NOOR I DO! IDM HER BEING SUPER POWERFUL!!! I JUST WISH IT LIKE. i wish every other interesting character or plotpoint#in the series wasnt trampled to be like And noor is the specialest girl on earth and shes one of the 7 who can seal caul away again#blahblahblah. IDK.
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hes doing it again
#i hate angst i dont wanna be an eddie angst guy but wow do i have to so often#for personal catharsis relatiation of a certain brand of steve angst that i have to see everyday for some reason#you know! you know what :)i complain about it all the time! :)#where suddenly eddies some big fuckkng asshole douchebag who hurt steves feelings#and steve is insecure and eddie has to fix it with love 😍 but if eddies insecure its about how that hurts steve somehow#and eddies a big dumb idiot who made steve cry and now everyone hates him and makes him grovel im siiiiickoffff iiiit#sick of what if eddie was using being an asshole as a defense mechanism and hurt steve when they were 12 😍 and steve is still#traumatized by it and eddie has to be like sorry im so mean and evil and stupid ill never do it again.#and rhen steve and everyone else holds it above his head forwver anyways. even though its NOT! okay for people to mention steves pastactions#and also steve was mean as a defense mechanism!!! so actually he wasnt an asshole and we should all let it go!!#but then eddie was mean as a defense mechanism heres why tbat makes him a Giant Evil Man and#LIKE FUCK! FUCKING...!!! THEYRE. THE SAME. TBEYRE THE SAME HIGH SCHOOL EXPERIENCE IN DIFFERENT FONTS#thEYRE THE SAME KINDA JUDGY SOMETIMES BITCHY BRAND OF YOUNG MAN. IM BEGGING. FOR SOME F#i dont mean that eddie cant make mistakes i just want it to not always be so blatantly STUPID AND FRUSTRATING AND NOT A MISTAKE HED MAKE!#its just. steve is allowed to make mistakes too and i like when he does!#steve is allowed to make a mistake and have to apologize i promise it wont kill you#sorry rant over i feel weightless and free now i need to reiterate these complaints once a month i think or ill be taken and executed
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just talking to my friend in dms about how at first when q!charlie started calming down from his rampage i was kinda upset cause i WANTED a full villain arc i wanted blood and rage and a massacre but then I kept watching and realised how much of a fucking idiot I was to underestimate charlie slimecicle’s rp skills like that. because charlie isn’t just playing a character hell bent on righteous revenge for his daughter, he’s playing a character actually grieving that daughter.
it’s obvious now that i think about it that the initial revenge plot to kill all the eggs and his repeated self affirmations that juanaflippa isn’t gone and that it can all just be reset are clearly just him entering the denial and anger stages. and that later scenes after the rest of the server finally backed him into a corner and calmed him down and he had that heart wrenching scene looking at juanaflippa’s photo, asking for a literal trial for her life and soul back and then that whooooole bar scene, that he has then entered the bargaining and depression stages.
Because the truth is, q!charlie doesn’t actually want to kill anyone (except Mariana lolll), he especially doesn’t want to kill any of the eggs! All he wanted was to be a good dad. And I think that that’s part of the reason he as a character failed so hard to actually tangibly hurt anyone during this stream. He was a mess, crying screaming yelling clawing trying to do something, anything to save his daughter. Anything to fix it all. That scene of him failing to break into Phil’s house haunts me.
But I think there’s something especially tragic that before Juanaflippa, q!charlie probably was the kind of character to hurt others without caring, he seemed to have no idea about empathy or healthy relationships before her thats for sure. He’s literally already killed TWO eggs before this, so causally and with such ease. But his love for his daughter improved him, and it changed him, and it made him just enough of a better person that when that daughter was taken from him, suddenly even to save her he can’t fucking do it anymore.
I also really appreciate how everyone else on the server reacted to him too. They didn’t at all treat him like some big bad scary villain like I originally would I’ve expected. Sure they were understandably wary and protective, but every single one of them weren’t so much angry at him as… WORRIED for him. And it really helped put it in perspective that this isn’t some guy going on a hashtag villain arc, but immersed me in oh fuck. This is a guy that just lost his daughter. And all his friends and fellow parents know. And they aren’t scared of him, they’re concerned for him. They aren’t full of fear… but pity. Because they know. They know what he’s just lost. And they understand. And they’re trying to be there for him.
And Charlie despite all the grand speeches and diabolical plots and not so carefully placed land mines… doesn’t really care how he gets Juanaflippa back, as long as she’s with him again.
Just man,,,, the way Charlie performed this character’s grief is so fucking stellar and SO fucking excruciating. The part that genuinely broke me was in that photo scene when he said: “i'm sorry flippa... i thought i could change something- i thought i could undo it, thought i could make it right... now i see that there's no way this can be made right...” which already fucking ow ow OW and clearly him finally exiting denial/anger straight into depression but then he whispers THIS FUCKING BIT: “it wasnt even on purpose… i know that... it doesnt make it better… what do i do juanaflippa?” LIKE FUCK!!!! FUCK!!!! OKAY!!!!!
Anyway massive props to everyone for the rp today but ESPECIALLY charlie for this agonisingly accurate and visceral depiction of grief that I somehow was NOT expecting. I thought we were going to get villain arc egg massacre angst and instead we got father mourning his daughter trying futilely to do anything to bring her back angst. I’m never fucking recovering from this one.
#qsmp#q!charlie#q!slimecicle#qsmp slimecicle#qsmp analysis#fizz character thoughts#juanaflippa#el mariana#qsmp spoilers
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HII
I LOVE UR WRITING and was wondering if u could do headcanons of the main 4 in hxh (if thats too much then just Gon and Killua separately) having an s/o who's just really sweet, kind, polite n calm
but can turn 180 rq and become super defensive of their loved ones.. insulting n basically having no mercy on whoever messed w them
TYY
I t didnt save thr first draft :(( it was so long and quite good too :((
Anywaysssssss
THANK YOU FOR REQUESTING!! IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY TO SEE THAT PEOPLE ENJOY MY WORK!!
I dont think i did well with the second part of the req in most cases and i am really sorry for that
tw: none i think? mentions of "recreating" the kurta clan :3
𝓚𝓾𝓻𝓪𝓹𝓲𝓴𝓪 𝓚𝓾𝓻𝓽𝓪, 𝓛𝓮𝓸𝓻���𝓸 𝓟𝓪l𝓪𝓭𝓲𝓷𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽, 𝓖𝓸𝓷 𝓕𝓻𝓮𝓮𝓬𝓼𝓼, 𝓚𝓲𝓵𝓵𝓾𝓪 𝓩𝓸𝓵𝓭𝔂𝓬𝓴 (𝓼𝓮𝓹𝓪𝓻𝓪𝓽𝓮) 𝔁 𝓰𝓷! 𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓭𝓮𝓻
⋆ ˚☁️ ⁀➴
⋆ You would be just a new hunter trying to make some good money while also putting your skills to use, so you became a bodyguard. That is how you two met
⋆ My bb is obsessed with revenge but thats okay, he later became obsessed with you too
⋆ Somehow you would get closer cuz u got that mc energy (ik that Gon is the mc but you slay sooo)
⋆ This would be the Fell first (you) and fell harder (kurapika) cuz oml
⋆ He would probably notice that you caught feelings for him, but dw he will soon notice his feelings soon.
⋆ After more time of knowing you, he would notice more of the small things you do, both for him and other people.
⋆ The sweet smile you give people that pass by, or just you asking him if he slept well made his heart speed up.
⋆ His heart also sped up when you offered to help him get his revenge and get the eyes of his clan memebers back
⋆ After he completed his revenge he would confess to you <3
⋆ He would be so sweet!!
"You aren't feeling well love? Do you want me to cook you something delicious? Coming right up!!"
⋆ He would want children, so if you cant have children or cannot, you would maybe hire a surrogate or adopt, but i am not sure how would adoption work if he would wanna pass the scarlet eyes too, cuz yk, genes...
⋆ Oki so, you two would meet in med schol and lemme tell you, he would be SMITTEN
⋆ You would start hanging out as study partners, and later have actual cute study dates in cafés.
⋆ Honestly, i feel like he would confess quite soon, but it would be really romantic and all, like good food, candles and all that.
⋆ Honestly he is so underrated?! Like whaaaaaaaaa, like yeah he was sorta weird, especially in the trick tower but still!
⋆ He is so husband material tho, not only is he nice, loves you, but he is also able to provide, hunter priviledges ig...
⋆ He would also want children, but only after marriage, and if you are okay with it, but more likely to adopt, since he knows there are a lot of children who are growing up in bad enviroment
⋆ Omg such a baby <3
⋆ You are his friend from the Hunter exam, and you also passed on your first try, so you are quite strong, and you travel with him and Killua
⋆ You both would be really oblivious, acting all sweet and lovey dovey together, so much everyone always assumed you two were dating, even Killua, so he decided to confront you two about it.
⋆ You ofc both denied it, and after seeing Gons embarrassed face, you wanted to tear Kill to shreds, how dare he embarrass Gon! Little did you know that the smoke coming out of Gons head wasnt from embarrassement, but from thinking.
⋆ Did he really like you?
⋆ 𝕪𝕖𝕤
⋆ After he thought it through, he was quite sure that he did like you. He just randomly ran up to you and yelled that he loves you
"(name) I AM SO SORRY I HAVENT REALIZED IT SOONER BUT I LOVE YOU SO MUCH PLEASE GO OUT WITH ME!!"
⋆ sweetie
⋆ You would be another kid from Whale Island, and you wanted to take the Hunter exam with Gon, but your parent/guardian, didn't let you yet because you weren't strong enough at the time. How can they tell? They used to be a hunter.
⋆ Then after Gon and the main group saved Killua from his crazy ahh family, he wrote you a letter that they were going to the Heavens Arena, and your parent/guardian let you go because it is a training opportunity, and also an opportunity to get you to socialize- urmmm
⋆ So that was when you met Killua
⋆ You two mostly bonded when Gon got hurt in the fight, cause you both love and cherish the little bean, and also while learning nen<3
⋆ After some time, he started to wonder why does he feel weird when talking and spending time with you (hmm its killua x reader, i wonder why...)
⋆ When you got to the 200 floor and fought some guy, he looked as if he was about to win, at that moment Kill wanted to kill him, but you did it instead<3 lovely<3
⋆ After that, you went to the Whale island again, and he met your parent/guardian (moving fast aren't we Kill?~) and they would be your second biggest shipper, cause Gon took the first place.
⋆ Somehow, you convinced your parent/guardian, to let you go with them to york new, and maybe also hang out with them till the next hunter exam, but the second part of you could do was only allowed after they got to know you would go with Killua >_<
⋆ First date in York New, only thanks to Gon (ily bb)
⋆ I can see that you two would either get together before the Hunter exam, or during the chairman election arc, idk
⋆ Either way! Alluka would ADORE YOU!!
⋆ His fav thing about you would be when you scold him for eating too many choco robots...because you care<3
𓇼 ⋆.˚ 𓆉 𓆝 𓆡⋆.˚ 𓇼
Thank you for reading lovelies, remember to drink water, eat 3x a day, and taek care of yourself, baiii<3
#hxh#hunter xhunter#hxh killua#hunter x hunter killua#killua zoldyck#killua x reader#killua zoldyck x reader#hxh gon#gon freecss#gon x reader#gon freecss x reader#leorio#leorio paladinight#leorio paladinight x reader#leorio x reader#leorio hxh#kurapika kurta#kurapika#kurapika hxh#kurapika x reader#kurapika kurta x reader#niko niko writes
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can you rant abt hiveswap and how it changes the per-established alternian lore and not in a good way. i hold no stake in this topic but i love to hear about worldbuilding differences and people complaining
oh my god i would loveeee too. well first of all the obvious stuff with how they seem to think the beta trolls were the stereotypes for their caste (NOT TRUE... very very untrue but ESPECIALLY untrue with like. jadebloods goldbloods and purplebloods who seem to get this the worst somehow)
i hateeee how they made jades preppy THATS KANAYAS THING.. AND SHES EXPLICITLY *WEIRD* FOR THAT. they literally mention it like over 20 times how kanaya is sooooo weird for liking fashion and dressing well and then. oh no i guess every jade does that actually whoops sorry! ToT and god do i even need to go into the terrible prevalence of the idea that "jadebloods are typically/instinctively nurturing" when that is textually not the case?
goldbloods all having double horns is not that big of a deal tbh but its really funny to me that they made that assumption when sollux is like. actively called a mutant for most of the comic. "oh yeah hes mutated and weird and fucked up and some of his body parts are doubled (cue dick jokes here)". like that was a thing for sollux but they just decided to say "well actually. thats just how all goldbloods are"
most purplebloods having a "clowny aesthetic" is fine with me honestly since theres an actual Profession of being a subjuggalator and presumably lots of purples are going to be wanting to go into that? but alllll of them being full on juggalo cultists goes directly against canon. its like. the difference between american lawmaking and christianity. yes the separation of church and state is like nonexistent here. but just because american lawmaking is an enterprise controlled by christianity doesnt mean that All Politicians/Cops are automatically christian. and definitely not the same kind of christian?? there are probably agnostic clowns, or clowns who are only into cultism for the aesthetic. even reformist vs. orthodox clowns. they may all be upholding the same systemic white christian status quo, but they doesn't mean they all fit into that niche themselves. if that makes sense?
and of course i've already made a whole post about how i hate the idea that olivebloods are all feral little rogues, since that makes very little sense in canon.
i would really love to do that full stream of the hiveswap and friendsim games just. going through all of their alternian stuff and explaining my thoughts on it and how it relates to canon... i could go on and on about this stuff for ages and get into way more than just caste stereotypes. i think i would need to reread all of homestuck first to make sure i wasnt just pulling shit out of my ass and was truly studied up though, lmao
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Before any Stolas/itz stans come to me saying I am a Blitzø stan, I'm not. I dont like Blitzø but this thought has been in my head for awhile and I gotta bring it out here.
Imagine this...
A society where Imps are seen as the second lowest class next to hell hounds where not many are able to start their own buisness.
Now Blitzø wanted to start his own killing buisness where he needs to get to the human realm. Currently its successful, but its only sucessful when he sleeps with Stolas every month for his grimore which access people in hell to the human realm.
A lot of people have already talked about the power dynamics and coercive relationship the two have so this post is mainly me talking about how Stolas was the one to force Blitzø into the relationship, whether he knew or not.
1. The reason for Blitzø to live
Lets just get this out of the way, the Grimore is the reason why Blitzø needs to run his buisness. The buisness that helps pay for his daughter and him to have a roof over their head, and their employees. Money that helps them pay for food, bills, other necessities for them to LIVE. Imps are one of the lowest classes in society, we see in previous episodes they may work as butlers for the Goetia and a not treated well.
In Full Moon Blitzø was begging for Stolas for him to do better all because he missed a bit for their arrangment. Alot of people think hes pleading because he "actually loves Stolas and wants to do better" when.... No it was more of Blitzø begging to keep the one thing that kept his buissness that he worked so hard to maintain afloat - and this was before Stolas showed him the crystal. Even if thats not what the writers intended thats not how it comes off in the show.
2. "But Blitzø started the arrangement!"
No he didnt. When Stolas took Blitzø to the bedroom when he was caught trying to steal the grimore, he thought Blitzø was going to "ravish him." HE made it sexual in the first place.
Now its been 25 years since these two last saw eachother. In that time things change and these two only interacted once as KIDS. When you are a child your personality and perspective usually changes as you grow older. What I mean by this is that Stolas being a royal, in Blitzø's mind he believes that if Stolas figured out WHY he was here sneaking around his house, there is a good chance Stolas could just kill him.
And before any of you say "But Stolas would NEVER do that 🥺"
How exactly is Blitzø suppose to know???
It's been 25 years since they lady saw each other. Stuff changes. If Blitzø thought Stolas wouldn't kill him if caught, then why didn't he just ask Stolas for the book? I mean if he knew that Stolas would willingly give him the book for the business, then wouldn't this whole arrangement like- never happen in the first place???
In his mind in this situation, Blitzø was panicking. In this situation him being sexual with Stolas was his only priority in his mind to keep himself alive.... And then later he gave Stolas pity sex.
(Which let me just say since this part is what I believe defiently what wasnt going through Blitzø's mind... But if he left with the book not giving Stolas sex, I wouldn't be suprised that Stolas would feel betrayed and then track Blitzø down to take the book back. We know he can track him down in Murder Family and Truth Seekers, so I wouldn't be suprised but yeah I just wanted to point this out.)
3. "But What about Blitzø's Exes?"
People like to bring Up Blitzø's exes to point out how he somehow screwed up in his relationship with Stolas even though it is a separate issue. And something to point out is that Dennis, a character from the Queen Bee episode, was there. He wasn't an ex, he was a fling. I wouldnt be suprised that the amount of people there are just flings. As for Verosika she has every right to hate him after he maxed her credit card, but like.... girl making a party every year about hating Blitzø isnt going to let these people get over him.
In all honesty I think Blitzø having a lot of "Exes" was just meant to make Blitzø look worse than Stolas. This is just something I wanted to get out of the way.
4. If you still think that its Blitzø's fault cuz the relationship started, let me put it in perspective like this...
(This isnt suppose to be a 100% accurate comparison to Stolas and Blitzø but this is just to set an example)
There was this couple named John and Leslie. Now John has been intrested in Leslie in a romantic way and asks her to be in a relationship. She says yes and they date for awhile. Things may or may not start out ok but later down the line Leslie starts being not a good partner. By that I mean she might be emotionally manipulative towards him or making him think that anything Leslie herself doesn't like is immediately JOHN'S fault. Apparently if we go by the HH/HB fandom's logic, John would be at fault for being abused because HE was the one who started the relationship. The fact that he had feelings for her at one point automatically means that he has to be in the relationship forever now.
Now if we go to Blitzø and Stolas, Blitzø is at fault for being in sexual coercion because he tried to not get himself (In his mind) killed by Stolas when he tried taking his book. Its his fault for not loving him when what they had was a transactional agreement that was purely business. Its Blitzø's fault for not realizing Stolas was having a serious conversation with him in Full Moon, when Stolas has never treated Blitzø like an equal in the past.
Conclusion
When going through this whole rant I wanted to put this somewhere but didnt know where:
I don't condemn thievery... but I also dont condemn coercive rape.
Just because Stolas feels bad about it does not make anything any better. Even if he didn't mean to put Blitzø in this situation, whatever way you look at it, its unhealthy. Blitzø needed the book to run his buisness that he worked hard for to LIVE. Stolas was the one who decided this whole agreement. HE was the one who put these two in this predicament. And yet this show still decides to make Stolas look like a victim.
#helluva critique#hazbin critical#helluva critical#helluva criticism#helluva boss critique#helluva boss critical#helluva boss criticism#hb critical#anti stolas#anti stolitz#stolas critical
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I hope I can ask you this because I don't want to ask in the tags, I'm scared 🥹 but I've seen a lot of discourse about why tommy isn't good for buck, he's cold, the relationship is toxic etc and I was wondering why people think that? Is there anything specific that started it?
I fully believe eddie is buck's true love, endgame, whatever we want to call it and I'm sad we don't have that (yet) but I thought bucktommy was kinda fun in the meantime. I just want to understand 🫶🏻
Oh hey darling! you were so sweet and genuine in your response so please know I’m just answering what I’m asked and if you wanna enjoy and have fun with bt that is completely your prerogative but I’m just offering my perspective on it
And i am warning you this is gonna be long because I feel a constant need to go really in depth in my thoughts
Okay so idk how I’m gonna break this down but maybe I’ll do it in like main points?
Also if you’re new here whenever I use bullet points I’m just doing it cos I find it easier to chunk up my thoughts not cos I’m being curt or anything with you
1. The chimney and hen begins episodes
He wasnt just passive in the episodes and letting Gerard get away with his racist and misogynistic behaviour he ACTIVELY participated in it
This includes:
• Asking if they forgot to tip the delivery guy WHILE THEY WERE EATING CHINESE FOOD when chimney first comes up despite the fact that 1. Chimney had a big ass lafd bag 2. They were probably already told a probie would be coming 3. Probably would’ve seen the actual delivery guy 4. I would bet my absolute life that question would not have been asked if buck or bobby had walked up those stairs this wasn’t an innocent comment it WAS RACIST intentionally like the entire point of the episode was to show how bad they had it
• the New York bitchiness comment
• throwing his tools down along for hen to clean up
• going out of his way to treat them like outcasts and hating chimney before he even knew him despite chimneys efforts
• the way each of them had to “earn his respect” in some way before he acted like a normal coworker to them and this was never in the typical ‘oh it’s a new person’ type of way it always had to do with their race or in hen’s case her gender too
A defence I see a lot for this is “oh he was closeted” and honestly to me that is such bullshit because 1. Eli was perfectly capable of not participating in the racism and taking chimney under his wing without getting any shit for it and chimney is quite literally a Korean man (something he literally can’t hide) and he had just got his head above water with Gerard’s racism when hen came and he STILL was a friend to her 2. Again tommy wasn’t passive in it and just letting Gerrard be racist (which would’ve been one thing) no he actively participated in it to be part of the boys club 3. Let’s say that somehow not being a dick would’ve meant that that was a threat to the closet he was in- that is still in my opinion a fucked up sense of preservation if you spare yourself the possibility of bigotry (despite having inherent social capital by being a white man in that job) by inflicting others to bigotry
Now when Tommy was first reintroduced I was like keeping an open mind and saying okay it’s been a lot of time and maybe he has genuinely made amends because I do believe in redemption but imo they have made no attempt to show us that and had him honestly put more of the blame on Gerrard for his behaviour or the writers flat out avoiding mentioning it to retcon tommy a little and hope we forget
Another defence I see is “oh chimney and hen became friends with him so they must’ve forgave him”, hen went no contact the moment he left (something the writers went out of their way to include that line) and chimney didn’t even invite him to his wedding which was quite big after the Buckley parents got involved so it’s not like it was cos it was such a small and intimate wedding and he only called him as far as we know in those years when he needed a favor, which all means that most likely they had kinda just put it behind them and kept up a coworker relationship with him, but no actual friendship or actual forgiveness or redemption had taken place
Oh wow all that was just point one and I can probably talk more on it but I’ll just leave it with saying that Lou’s comments about it being teasing or how Tommy genuinely didn’t know hen or chimney were capable etc just makes for a worse case than saying it’s cos of being in the closet (and that is genuinely a large part of why idk much abt Lou but those comments are enough to make me hate him) and I’ll also say that poc (myself included in that) have these situations so often- situations even as specific as gay men being racist to them to fit in - and we understand the nuance and shit to it but we also understand on a deep level how it feels to be on the other side of that
And getting toxic bt fans try to come up with ways to downplay or minimise racism honestly pisses me off so much cos believe you me we have heard every excuse and downplay under the sun and I for one am sick and tired of it
2. Why he’s viewed as cold and his jokes
• literally from the small parts we saw of him and Eddie hanging out we have seen the man is in fact capable of joking and being light and having fun but around buck in particular he’s like 🧍♂️😐 and the occasional 🙂 like it just feels very stiff and just plain in a way
• his humour consistently falls flat and feels passive aggressive more than anything like blunt or sardonic humour DOES work like I personally love it but it’s not being written OR executed right
A. It’s always in response to genuine moments or questions such as buck talking abt the award or the daddy kink joke or henren questioning him
B. It’s the the majority of what we see from him, there is not enough balance for it
C. Lack of rapport, when friends or couples make jokes that can come off the wrong way if said to anyone else it’s cos of the rapport built already, this rapport is not established with the characters OR with the audience for these jokes to come off right
D. I gotta say this one too but the execution just isn’t right from writing to acting, it’s the same reason sardonic humour lines from Sandra oh as Cristina Yang or hugh Laurie as house still lets you like the characters and find them funny but Tommys lines come off as annoying to a lot of people
3. I think fandom discourse probably has something to do with it but not in the way you think
I’m not saying like oh ppl who ship buddie just hate him cos of the ship no I’m saying that like what takes him from an annoying disliked character to a hated character is most likely the fact that his role stirred so much drama and caused so much damage to how the fandom used to be that its turned the dial up
4. A lot of his development, lore or redeemable factors or cute things are just not canon
This may be blunt and I am sorry for that but I think his character has been blown up to such a degree that it’s genuinely shocking
Like I look at posts or get sent hate and I’m like where did any of this happen this is just not canon this is just not a show like at times I’m genuinely convinced it’s a social experiment where different ppl saw a different show like some spiderman multiverse situation
Listen I’m all for headcanons genuinely like if you wanna take extra number three and make a whole backstory and lore and cute stuff abt her I’m all for it but it’s when it’s said as if it’s fact or canon that I’m like hold up a second rewind
I think this is kinda a result of Lou’s cameos (which honestly deserves its own post but you asked why the tommy hate so imma stay on topic) and also this like need to defend the character but not having much material to work with
Like if we look at canon we can literally break down the entirety of Tommys appearances this far in the show and what we learn about him:
• chimney begins- he makes a racist comment and he tries to suck up to Gerard, there is a little hint abt his gayness with the gf comment, Eli says to chimney that’s just how they are and tries to reason it could be fear of losing friends but we see tommy having friends in the firehouse while eli says this, chimney tries to make friends with him and tommy makes no attempt to get to know him and says he’d hate him anyways, chimney saves Tommys life thus earning his respect
• hen begins- she’s met with the same racism chimney is but also met with misogyny (and homophobia but that’s not relevant to the tommy of it all), we find out chimney is still isolated from the rest despite having earnt that respect, chimney befriends hen and again tommy still doesn’t try anything like that until hen proves herself and earns his respect, ppl reported Gerard but it’s never actually stated tommy was one of those ppl so again that’s not canon that’s speculated
• bobby begins- chimney and hen both seem to be like coworker friends with tommy and Sal, Sal throws hissy fit bobby “fires” him tommy says it’s an overreaction bobby reveals it was a transfer, they all seem to make nice, tommy leaves to 217
• chimney calls tommy for help and tommy helps
• we see nothing from tommy,then cruise ship he helps the team but also in this we find out hen cut off all contact since he left
• buck takes tour of harbour, Eddie and tommy have a friendship and we find out some of Tommys interests and that he was in the army, basketball scene and the subsequent apology and kiss
• dinner date, Tommy explains how he was in the closet, Buck has his little awkward moment (which will be elaborated on in my next point) , Tommy says nothing abt it till the Uber arrives and he leaves buck
• buck reaches out and apologises and asks for a second chance inviting tommy to the madney wedding
• bachelor party and the issue of the lack of costume and not just taking the day off for neither wedding nor bachelor party (which you can reason is reasonable but also I feel like this deserves its point for the narrative choices)
• tommy shows up straight outta work they kiss buck has the soot coming out award ceremony - buck being happy abt the reward to which tommy sardonically says enjoy it while it lasts enter bigoted cunt gerard then chimney comes and insults gerard and they walk away
• we don’t see tommy again till the dinner date after Bobby nearly died and when buck tries to explain Bobbys significance to his life tommy throws the your dad is still alive which is just honestly one of his worst moments imo and I made a whole post abt it but can’t find it and then we all know the rest of that convo and I could make a bullet point for it but actually I made a whole post before so I’ll link it: here
AND THATS IT
Like all this comes down to what maybe like 30 mins screentime? If that?
5. The leaving buck on their first date
The defences people use for this are:
• buck was trying to shove him back in the closet
• buck was obviously not ready
• people angry abt this are just babying buck like he can find his own way home it’s not that big of a deal
• buck was at fault there and tommy would’ve been justified in being angry and not giving him a second chance
And honestly every last one of these are bullshit imo and lemme go point by point
• buck panicked, I don’t think that what buck was feeling in that moment can be properly described because unless you’re a queer person and you’ve experienced that like bone deep panic that like brain overload then you won’t get it
Like one it’s his first queer date
Two he doesn’t even understand his own sexuality atp
Three his closest friend just walked in in a situation that’s already putting him on edge
So he’s not only panicking he’s not understanding why he’s panicking he’s trying to make excuses eventhough part of him knows he doesn’t need one but also he doesn’t even understand this side of himself yet so he doesn’t want to have to potentially explain it
Like it’s a million things and a million emotions and no one can claim they would behave rationally or appropriately in that situation and if you say that you would you’re lying simple as that
Also then we find out that Eddie thought tommy was straight anyways
• the reason I love the buddie coming out scene is because of Eddie’s “and what do you think” line because it’s not up to tommy or anyone else whether a person is “ready” enough in their queerness to date. Full stop.
Also tommy knew it was Buck’s first date with a man and was still down so why is he using that as some sort of out
•it’s not about babying buck and it’s not about him finding his own way home it’s the fact that Tommy could’ve done it with much more grace and he could’ve been a lot nicer with it but he wasn’t, and this is again bucks first date with a man even if it doesn’t end with a second date it should at the very least not end up with him feeling like a screw up on the side of the road
• to the ppl who say that- kindly shut up cos again see the first point but also I wanna point out that somehow the ppl saying this are also the same ones saying that Tommy was justified to be RACIST for a prolonged period of time due to being in the closet yet Buck what? Panicking for a few seconds and being a little awkward? is somehow this giant inexcusable thing
5. The narrative choices with him have been reasonably clear and tbh if they had been made with a woman it would not be up for debate:
• tommy leaves buck on their first date then he comes back and gives buck a chance- we as a fandom have been unanimous in saying for years that Buck’s endgame would be the one that doesn’t leave him cos this pattern has been something we saw over and over with him
• tommy not dressing up- again you can rationalise it but it’s a narrative choice and it’s glaring when contrasted with Eddie suggesting the duo costume
And if we had this scene with Taylor so many ppl would be saying that it’s once again showing that her and Buck’s personalities don’t align
• him being on standby for the wedding and bachelor party- again you can say oh buck invited him last minute or oh he couldn’t taken the day off (which lbr he could’ve he’s not the only firefighter pilot in la) - but again narrative choice
If it was Taylor everyone would’ve been like SEE? Again they’re showing the audience that her work is this looming presence in their relationship
Anyway I’m gonna shut up now cos this is A LOT
I’m so sorry it took me so long to respond tho and sending flowers in apology💐💐💐💐💐💐
Love ya for being so genuine when asking and hope all this didn’t come off too strong and that it was idk helpful?🫶🫶
I realise my response is abt to have toxic bt fans scurry to my inbox like rats to send hate and to that I say go fuck yourselves I’m responding to a question here
#911#buddie#911 abc#evan buckley#911 fox#911onfox#eddie diaz#evan buck buckley#asks#asks open#send asks#my asks#send me asks#answered asks#anti bt#anti tommy kinard#fandom discourse#911 discourse
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match made in heaven | Alex Walter
pairing: Alex Walter x female!reader
show: My life with the Walter boys
warnings: just kissing word count: 2,2k
summary: At your birthday party you get dared to spend 7 minutes in heaven with none other than your best friend Alex.
a/n: A modified review of "Beautiful boy" Thank you @rogueanschel-reads for the woderful idea!
"Come on, even a stranger can sense your attraction for each other, the hidden love that lays beneath your friendship."
Maybe it wasnt the best idea to play truth or dare.
Well, firstly I want to say that I love my friendgroup. Grace, Skylar, his boyfriend Nathan, Kiley and of course, my best friend Alex.
Really, I love these guys. But sometimes they make me want to jump off a cliff, no regretting or turning back.
In moments like this, where I want to spent a good time partying with my friends, because its my 16th birthday, they need to remind me of the he-who-must-not-be-named-topic. That means for outstanders, my non-existent, strictly friendly feelings for my best friend Alex.
The guy, who has absolutely no idea, he's being compared to Voldemort. But for the matter of fact, Harry Potter are my all-time favorite movies and early Voldemort was actually quiet handsome. So, it kinda makes sense. Why? Because Alex has put a spell on me with his smile and his pretty face.
But back to my party.
We are currently in the living room, our knees are touching the legs of the person next to us and someone (Grace) encouraged us to smuggle a few bottles of alcohol to the party, even though we didnt plan to drink.
Now, Skylar had the great idea to embarrass everyone by playing truth or dare, but with a twist. He likes to call it "match made in heaven" or what it actually means, making out in a closet. Something like that, I've never participated in any of these games.
Until now.
As I am the birthday girl, I started the game by choosing truth. But I could really have just voluntarily confessed my feelings for Alex. Because Grace winked at me and I knew at that moment, that the next few minutes meant trouble.
"So, y/n. Describe us your magical boy, that you dream of being able to call your own." I knew it. She could have just asked me what college I wanted to attend or something less embarrassing, but no. She needed to ask me about my type in boys, which obviously is my handsome, brown haired best friend next to me.
As I'm about to hide my head in my hands, I hear the encouraging shouts of the people I call my friends.
"Okay, okay. Let me think for a moment." I couldnt make it that obvious, I liked him. But still, it was worth a try.
"Someone who has an angelic smile, where you just stare at his face and can´t stop looking at him. I-I like brown hair and I dont know, what it is, but hazel eyes, they somehow make my heart beat faster. I mean- he´s attractive, because he is a gentleman. Caring and supportive, someone who listens to my wants and needs, but still continues to be his true self. I can read books with him or we watch movies together and talk about it after. He makes me feel seen, safe. I love him, because he is everything I could ever dream of and more."
When I finish speaking, Grace grins innocent and looks at me with her long eyelashes. "I wonder, who that could be."
My eyes secretly dart to Alex, trying to figure out, if he knows, that I am very obviously describing him. But he just watches the floor, his eyebrows are drawn together and I almost think, he looks annoyed.
"Someone is jealous" I hear Skylar´s voice in my ear.
As the game went on, his behavior kept being slightly off, even though he never said anything about it and continued to smile at me, when we looked at each other.
And then, Alex was asked about his favorite memory, whether it was about being in school, with family or with friends.
Well, he told them about the first time, he introduced me to his favorite book saga, the Lord of the Rings. I never knew, that day was so special for him, but as he described my hilarious reactions and facial features, how he saw my eyes widen with disbelief as he read out the first chapters, I remembered.
When I look back, it really was a wonderful night. We did a sleepover at his house and were talking about watching Harry Potter or The Lord of the Rings. Somehow, we also talked about the books and that I read the seven books about the famous wizard and he the books about the elves and other creatures (don´t judge me for this description). We discussed almost every aspect, but he still convinced me to give his favorite books a try. So we spent the night spread out on his bed, eating sweets and reading the first book. Well, he mostly read it out loud to me, because his pronunciation was definitely much better than mine. It was fun, also because I got to watch him being in his element, so it really was a heartwarming evening.
I smile at the memory, a warm feeling blooms in my chest and when he finishes talking about it, he looks at me fondly. I had to keep myself from wanting to giggle like a little girl, but my inner 13-year old, most definitely did giggle.
Back to the original topic. Next, Grace was dared to wear one of my clothes, Kiley told us about her celebrity crush (Timothee Chalamet, but you didnt hear it from me) and when Alex was asked who he would trust with his secret, if he was spiderman, he mentioned me again. It was sweet and I had planned to tell him, that I would love to be the girl in the chair.
But, as the game went on, my name constantly fell from his lips. He was dared to show one of the most terrible photos of him and revealed to the group, a snapshot from us, wearing unrecognizable Halloween costumes. Funny, but my idea to go as ghosts wasnt that bad.
Nevertheless, he talked about the best gift he had ever received, a pair of cowboy boots, I got him two years ago (Nathan was playfully annoyed that one of his presents werent the best one) and as the game continued, the question, that I tried my best to avoid, was eventually asked.
"You two are always around each other and I've barely seen you apart, like ever. Are you sure, there is nothing going on between you? It seems like it."
Alex and I looked at each other, but then quickly laughed it off. It was what we always did, when someone asked us about our close friendship. None of us really answered and that meant for me, that he neither confirmed or declined having feelings for me. Very confusing and bad for my hoping heart.
So, when our friends are looking at each other now, grinning like they planned something really wicked, I know, that my personal hell is waiting for me. Or in my situation, a modified version of heaven.
"Y/n, I dare you to play seven minutes in heaven with just your best friend Alex." Grace is smiling in front of me and when I want to debate about it, she cuts me off.
"But I havent said I would take dare-" my words are going silent and I only hear my pounding heart.
"You always choose truth, that´s boring. You get the dare now, so stand up and cuddle with your wizard!"
Stupid, stupid, stupid.
Alex holds his hands out for me, so he can help me stand up. He silently looks at me and I try to assure him by smiling, but I think I´m failing at it. Because he looks as unnerved as I feel right now.
When we walk out of the room and into the small storage room, we hear Skylar´s distance shouting.
"No lights and close the door! That are the rules, we set the timer!"
Why was I friends with them again?
When we approach the room, unlocking the door and stepping inside, we are suddenly surrounded by darkness. And when he closes my only way to escape, its quiet for a moment. Then, I hear is curious voice.
"What did Grace mean about your wizard?"
I relax and gently laugh. Nothing has to happen, everything is fine.
"That you are as bad at keeping secrets than Draco. Harry really found out on the first day in 6th grade, that something was clearly up with him."
Alex groans. "Please no more talking about your Drarry shipping. I get it, it could have been an enemies-to-lovers romance."
I smack his arm, taking a step closer to him.
"Okay, what would you like to talk about instead?"
I can make out the outlines of his face in the darkness, seeing how he also takes a step closer. I feel myself breathing heavily and my hands nervously shaking.
"I think, that I should keep you warm, because I literally see your hands shaking." When he takes another step in my direction, I hold my breath and in the same second, I feel his arms wrap around me.
His hands find their way to my back, embracing me in his warmth until I feel him breathing on my neck. I need to stop myself from shivering at this feeling.
"I can work with that." I whisper, snuggling into his chest and closing my eyes. I hear his racing heart and immediately need to smile.
"Your heart is beating very fast." His chin rests on my head, I feel him holding me closer.
"It´s the darkness." Of course, it is.
When I also close my arms around his waist, I feel for the first time a kind of inner peace, that I read about in books.
When a character feels safe in the embrace of their beloved.
Silence surrounds us for a minute and I begin to thank Grace for her dare, because him holding me in his arms und me, hugging him, is much more than wonderful.
"When you call me a wizard, do I get to call you a witch?" I burst out a laughter at his question.
"Only if you won´t compare me to Umbridge." He nods quietly.
"You are as far away from being like Umbridge as the earth is away from the moon. So, you don´t have to worry."
"Good." We are silent again.
"So, have you ever thought about what you would do, if you would get to spent time with a person, when you have seven minutes in heaven?" I think for a few seconds, before I answer him.
"I always imaged this game as a way to confess feelings or solving a fight. Maybe a hidden chance to make out too, I guess."
I hear him taking a deep breath, not expecting much. Until-
"Can I kiss you?" My knees almost give out.
"You what-?" I turn to look at him. Noticing his widen pupils.
"I mean, would you, um, want to kiss. Like, me. Now. Not that you need to, but you sounded like you would want that experience, so-" he tries to hold a stable voice, but I can sense, that he's slowly freaking out.
"Alex. You just asked me, if we should kiss."
I can´t believe it.
"...yes?" He sounds so sincere.
"Why?" I ask, while continue to look at him, feeling every centimeter that divides our lips from touching.
"Like I said, I don´t want you to miss out on anything."
Silence.
"Okay and maybe I just wanted an excuse to kiss you, before that dream boy of yours does."
I lean forward, watching as his eyes keep looking at my lips, even though he tries to hold the eye contact.
I slowly raise my hand and place it on the back of his neck, caressing the dark hair and twirling a few strands.
"Are you jealous, pretty boy?" I feel his cheeks getting warm, seeing the effect my words have on him.
His hands hold me tighter and a startled expression is shown on his face.
"What? Me, jealous? No." I raise my eyebrows at him.
He signs. "Maybe. I dont like the thought of someone else with you." His thumb brushes over my lips.
"Kissing you, touching you. It just doesnt feel right, that someone else would do that."
"You mean, someone who isnt you?" I look at his lips and he hums quietly. His hand slowly wanders to my chin and directs my head closer to him, I can feel his breath on my skin.
"We don´t have to do it-" I begin to talk, but then again, when he speaks up, his voice sounds out of breath, like he's holding himself back.
"No, it´s just one...little...kiss" his voice becomes quieter, the less distance there is between our faces.
And with one, last look, he catches my lips in a slow kiss. Keeping me close to him, by holding onto my waist. His hands find their way to my cheeks, caressing them with his fingers and I feel my heart pounding as prominent against my chest as feel him kissing me.
I don't notice, that he's directing me back until I gently hit the wall, while his hands slowly explore my sides. My hands tangle in his hair, tugging him closer, so I can feel everything of him.
And in that moment, I understand the name of the game. Because this truly feels like heaven.
When I notice, that I can´t breath anymore (but who needs oxygen when you can have Alex Walter), we gently break apart. Still holding onto each other.
And as soon as we catch our breath, both of us are smiling at each other and we share our feelings without a word.
"That was-" he doesnt get to finish his sentence, because in a blink of an eye, the door opens and brightness consumes us.
We quickly break apart, but apparently too late, because Grace´s voice is the first one to tease us.
"Right, you are just friends."
You can imagine, what the entire evening after that was like...
#alex walter#my life with the walter boys#fanfic#x reader#7 minutes in heaven#birthday#in love#best friends#best friends to lovers
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Soo do you remember when Boothill came out, so many people (me included) compared him to Arlechinno and say that he’s “genderbent Arlechinno” despite being literally the opposite of her?
:)
Can i request Boothill with an Arlechinno!reader as a twin sibling?
Context:
Boothill and the reader are twins and they are the absolute opposites despite they’re similar appearances. One is loud and brash while the other is quiet and stoic, one is a normal kid while the other is for some reason cursed? No one in their little family knew why or how the reader have a curse but there wasnt much they can really do about it. Regardless, Boothill and the reader are as thick as thieves, never seen without the other. But then the IPC came and blew up their planet which finally seperated the two twins. The reader somehow survived bc of their curse but now they sometimes glitch (like how Arle does in her idle animation). Now the reader nor Boothill knows that the other survived for a while but then they bumped into each other and you can take the reins from here
Hope you have a lovely day/night!
(Somehow im in a Boothill fever.. i blame Nicholas (DanHeng’s VA) for his damn Boothill song)
- Flower Anon 🌸
Oooh, I really love this idea, Flower Anon!! I have to admit, though, that I struggled writing this so bad, so I'm sorry if it turned out horribly.
Thank you otherwise for your request and sorry it took so long!!<3
Content: Platonic relationships, twin sibling reader, angst, vague mentions of Boothills past, sfw
Reader has no set pronouns!
((Not proofread))
The summer we died in. (Boothill x Twin!Reader)
"If I didn't know yer so well, I would've maybe been shocked to see you alive." Your brother's southern drawl shook memories awake in your mind. Memories that had been left slumbering in the fields of your old home, under the warm sun and in the tall grass. And yet... you didn't feel anything.
"... I suppose I could say the same thing about you -" "-Boothill. That's the name now." You hum dully as you crossed your arms and turned your head away from the confused Trailblazer in front of you to look at him. You had come to Penacony for business, or rather revenge, only to be dragged into its mess on accident. You therefore didn't expect to see the remnants of your formerly dead brother standing before you.
But could you even consider him alive in the state he was in now? A blurry image of what he looked like once came to mind, yet melted away just as fast. You didn't actually remember how he looked like anymore.
"Boothill then."
Silence filled the air, the tension thick and suffocating, yet neither of your gazes faltered. You just... didn't know what to say. There was a time in which you'd childishly dream of seeing him again, the way you'd throw yourself into his arms and then return with him to your families farmhouse. You'd act like nothing happened, become the siblings again that you always were.
But the realisation that it was all just that, a dream, made you press your lips together in the near... disappointment? You should've known better than to become so disillusioned from everything, and yet the reality still hurt you deep, deep down, under the endless layers of your curse.
"Uhm... my apologies, but you know eachother?" Robin asked carefully, seemingly saying exactly what your other companions had been thinking. Your gaze thoughtfully shifted around the twisted yet nostalgic landscape of the dreamscape, not knowing how to answer. You knew eachother once. But now? You weren't sure. You had never met "Boothill". And your brother, therefore remains dead.
Said man scratched his head awkwardly. "Uh yeah, that's my twin -" "-Reallyyy??? You guys don't look nor act alike at all!" March gasped out, only to be quickly hushed by Dan Heng and the Trailblazer. "... Hah, did ya hear that? Things never change!" Boothill grinned at you the way he used to, another memory of pranks and mischief under the moonlight filling your head again, which you just waved away. "Some things don't. But most do... How did you make it?" "Always so straight to the point." Your brother's grin widened as his relief and excitement began seeping through at last. His shoulders relaxed, eyes crinkling with a familiar spark you found yourself nearly stepping away from.
"But let's just say I'm after the same man you are." Ofcourse he'd know exactly what you were in Penacony for. You were one in the same when it came to your wrath. You wanted revenge for your lost family and for eachother, unknowing of the others' fate beyond death. You would've found it funny if you could have felt anything at all.
"Right." You didn't want to know more than that yet. "How'd you get in? Doubt you swam in that lil' pool all the way here." He hummed, which made you tilt your head. Why was he so casual? Why was he acting like neither of you had died? That both of you were together all along throughout the years you missed? It was bizarre and yet so awfully fitting. "... Remember the curse?" You held up a clawed hand that glitched through the force of the dreamscape. You couldn't remember what made you gain this ability, having woken up this way after the catastrophe. But it came in handy in moments like these.
Robin raised a hand to her chin. "You... were able to bypass the dreamscape and just enter it?" "Yes." You replied, and Boothill chuckled at that. "Wish you got that sweet ability sooner. Would've helped us out lots during the ol' days." You stared ahead, nearly through him. Was he trying to cope with your appearance before him this way? Was he trying to deflect the realisation that he wasn't totally alone after all? You didn't know what to think.
"... Let's go together. I overheard your part of the plan from the Trailblazer, and time is running out. If we want to defeat Mr. Sunday, then we have to get going." You said, voice as intimidating and cold as it used to be. It seemed to snap everyone out of their confused daze as they proceeded with the plan. Boothill met your gaze amongst the general commotion of your companions quickly speaking over eachother before taking their own respective leaves.
You stood there, seemingly stuck on how to proceed, which felt so out of character for you. You were used to ordering people around, intimidating them, and demanding the near impossible. But here you were now, speechless and hesitant. Did this perhaps hit you harder than previously expected? Boothill just tipped his hat and led the way automatically, another memory flickering of him doing the same during your nightly pranks. You'd sneak out and hop over the wooden fence surrounding your home to bother your old, grumpy neighbor. Those days were always so warm, the summer heat seeping into the night that began to cool off on your skins.
Those days never seemed to end. It was never cold. Always warm, scorching warm. Burning, flames, smoke filling your lungs and then total destruction.
"-Remember that day? The last one." Yes, you did. It's all you thought about during your travels. It's what fueled your revenge. You said nothing in reply, but he didn't mind. "It was warm. Last day of summer they said but it didn't feel like it to us." The false night sky of the dreamscape stretched out over the extravagant city. You looked down on the dreamers who decided to live a lie rather than face reality. There was a time in which you'd find them pathetic, but now you see yourself in their crowd, gazing right up at you with an equally as unreadable face.
"It was the summer we died in. So I guess they were right. It was our last day." He loaded his gun and raised it to the sky, his body turned away from you. The bright lights below illuminated his sides, hair flowing in the wind whilst the hat covered his eyes. It was a foreign image, one you couldn't recognize. "Why... are you like this?" You asked after a moment of consideration, but what you really meant was why he didn't even feel affected by you being alive all along.
Yet then again... you didn't know if you felt anything either.
Despite your differences, you were the same deep down, he was right there too. And deep down, you realized too late that you weren't the same you used to be either. Death had taken you both. You weren't siblings here. You weren't related at all. The only thing connecting you was his shadow you stood in. But even that did little to shake you physically.
"Because it doesn't matter anymore who died that summer." He shot the flare into the air, hundreds of lights beginning to fill the night sky soon after. He looked back at you with a wild, unrestrained grin. "What matters is that we get the revenge we need for the dead, ain't that right? That's something your serious behind would say, at least."
You couldn't help but dully chuckle then. It was barely heard, so weak he could've nearly missed it, but he didn't. Stepping up next to him, out of his shadow, you gave him the faintest smile.
"You're right, Boothill... Let's get revenge for those who died that summer."
#honkai star rail#honkai star rail fanfic#honkai star rail x reader#honkai star rail x you#hsr x reader#hsr#hsr boothill x reader#hsr boothill#boothill x reader#boothill
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