#crack post

[sayangrafayel]

Zayne: I don't need to go to bed. I'm not tired, I'll be fine.

MC: But, darling, I'll be so lonely without you. Come curl up in my arms so I can feel whole again.

Zayne: Are you... trying to seduce me into healthy sleeping patterns?

MC: Is it working?

[codedchaos]

Not to side with the flesh but you are Not the person who should detail who is attractive

Infinites just on hitaus guys dw

[one-in-a-million-fishsticks]

Do you think that any Belmonts other than Trevor had silly little nicknames for Alucard?

Or did the subsequent generations view giving him nicknames as disrespectful because he was too Legendary ™?

Now I'm just thinking about how funny it would be if Juste was the first Belmont in nine generations to come up with a nickname for Alucard because he has the attitude of a honey badger and doesn't give a shit.

[drowseyqueen]

Aftermath of Fadel reluctantly hiring Style to work at his burger joint:

Style: so what even are the benefits of me working here? Health insurance? Dental? What about retirement benefits?

Fadel: nothing. Take it or leave it.

Style: alright sheesh. I guess looking at your beautiful face is enough for now

[hermanoga]

I know what they wanted to mean but that unfertilised eggs remind me of PCOD 😭 lu guang, my babygirl, let's schedule an appointment to a gynaecologist pls, timeline messes with our hormones and pheromones

[lolapath]

Devil made me do it

[womp-goblin]

YES SWEETIE THE HANNIBAL FAIRY WILL VISIT YOU WHEN YOU SHED YOUR FIRST LIVER

[chuunardo]

Confessions of a rotten ragdoll and a rotten ribbon 🍏

This is what I did when TikTok was down lol.

The Yaoi coming back to haunt Gangle (she drew these herself):

Also the said Yaoi in question:

If you can tell what I'm referencing then I love you 🫶🏽🎀

[captainyiffers]

things i draw to deliberately piss off specific people

[anna-blog-arcane]

@viktor-rp Paaaaaaaaaaaaaaa? Can she come home? I named her Olga

[sayangrafayel]

Sylus: MC likes to say ‘you can be part of the problem or part of the solution,’

Sylus: But I happen to believe I can be both.

[olailamajnoon]

Dick, on the phone: *leans away* Clark says hi, guys.

Tim: Hi!

Jason: Hi.

Cassandra: Hi.

Stephanie: Hi.

Duke: Hi!

Damian: Hi.

Dick, on the phone: Clark they all say hi back.

Bruce to himself, so done: Truly a pinnacle of human communication. I say something they ignore me, but it's all 'hi' like synchronized idiots when it comes to Clark.

Clark, faintly audible: Bruce I heard that.

[sweeneydino]

A poetic writer, scholar, genius, scientist, and evil ruler.

Can you tell that I fucking love that 2012 shredder pic?

Strangely this took 2hours. Usually im quicker than that. Im very tired—

[violent138]

Thinking of Bruce downing like a sizable amount of pain meds due to tolerance and abnormal levels of pain so he can still function and because he's normally so quiet and now he's buzzed quiet there's no outwardly apparent difference unless you're Alfred or one of his kids or Clark. And while Bruce's favourite thing to do in this state is attend WE board meetings, he occasionally has to head to the Watchtower.

Emergencies sober him up fast, but the second a need for coherency ends he lapses back to mellow. Nobody notices that he's been nodding continuously because Clark keeps subtly coughing or lightly kicking his chair.

Works perfectly until Clark kicks it out and Bruce goes down like a stringless puppet.

[kens-ramblings]

i personally like to think instead of Tim putting on a siren or something when he gave warning for the whole blowing up LOA buildings and stuff he played Blow by Kesha and figured they’d get the hint (it worked surprisingly well). I just think it’s funnier if we let tim be extra cunty even when he’s literally having the worst time in his life :D

i also think it’d be hilarious if like a couple years down the road the batfam still has like no clue what tim did while he was on his bruce hunt. like whenever they ask he just gets a haunted look and says “you don’t wanna know” and calls it a day. but somehow(maybe ra’s sent it to them for some power play type thing???) they get footage of this specific instance. and all of them are looking at tim in varying amounts of horror(except jason, because i also like to think he’s the only one who sees through tim’s normal human mask and sees him as unhinged as he is) and tim has to be like “well shucks guys i needed a little bit of humor in my life at the time idk what to tell you”

[thekingofspin]