#crack post

[4aceclover]

The characters from the books are fine it's just… there's so many of them

And not many of these kids live so it's even more heartbreaking

Seriously the gumdrop Angel and lost Freddy story made me so sad and I don't even read these books I just happened to know about them

*Cough* *cough* game theory *cough*

Do you guys fuck with the FNAF books?…

[i-think-i-thunk]

*someone graffitis Eddie's van or something*

Steve: Get some coke, it'll come right off. That stuff can strip rust.

Eddie: *confused* Okay...

~later~

Eddie: *holding a baggie* Okay, I brought the coke. Still not sure how this is going to help though.

Steve:

Eddie: What?

Steve: I MEANT THE SODA

Eddie: Oh. Oops??

[srslylini]

the crew after finding out everything that happened was because they met each other during their childhood/young adult years

I need this to happen

[amirmeavid]

I know the fandom generally agrees merlin and arthur would sort out the magic ban before getting married. But i got to say it would be objectively hilarious to watch King/Prince Consort of fucking Camelot, the OG magic hater, just prance around, lax as fuck because who the hell is brave enough to accuse the literal 2nd most important person in Albion of breaking the law? 🤣

Like just imagine all the dialogues that could come out of it:

Magic-Hating Noble: I watched the chair levitate!

Merlin: I was the only other person in the room at the time... :/

Arthur: Are you accusing your King Consort of sorcery? *royal angry face*

Magic-Hating Noble: No! No... sire.

Arthur: Are you... accusing yourself of sorcery?

Magic-Hating Noble: ...

*merlin in the background making no effort to hide the fact that he's literally reading a spell book*

Merlin: *Teleporting into a busy council meeting because he's late*

Everyone: *Stares*

Merlin:

Arthur:

Everyone:

Arthur: *clapping his hands* Anyway, lets get this meeting started!

Merlin: *coming back from very publicly creating a massive storm to defeat some magical attack* Weird weather we're having right guys?

One of Uther's Loyalists: *literal steam coming out of his ears but too traditional to contradict a royal*

Merlin: *swans off, spell book in hand*

Let me know if you want more!

PART 2:

https://www.tumblr.com/amirmeavid/763239515298103296/part-2-full-disclosure-i-was-not-expecting-people?source=share

[sweeneydino]

Only villains like punch chowder.

Reference photos ofc

If you’re curious and haven’t seen it, its Red flags by Tom Cardy, and the Artist is Gabriella Antali! Check out their work :3

The other is Invincible lol

[denverdust]

this is absolutely horrible timing because 2 days ago I was joking with @anonymousgold about making a Genloss x Breaking Bad Better Call Saul crackfic crossover 🥲

[kens-ramblings]

i personally like to think instead of Tim putting on a siren or something when he gave warning for the whole blowing up LOA buildings and stuff he played Blow by Kesha and figured they’d get the hint (it worked surprisingly well). I just think it’s funnier if we let tim be extra cunty even when he’s literally having the worst time in his life :D

i also think it’d be hilarious if like a couple years down the road the batfam still has like no clue what tim did while he was on his bruce hunt. like whenever they ask he just gets a haunted look and says “you don’t wanna know” and calls it a day. but somehow(maybe ra’s sent it to them for some power play type thing???) they get footage of this specific instance. and all of them are looking at tim in varying amounts of horror(except jason, because i also like to think he’s the only one who sees through tim’s normal human mask and sees him as unhinged as he is) and tim has to be like “well shucks guys i needed a little bit of humor in my life at the time idk what to tell you”

[niko-sasaki-dbd]

Dead Boy Detectives Agency + Random Posts

[click for better resolution]

[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8]

[pythoness94]

Ross, barely resisting popping a blood vessel. :okay, Finn, Noah. How do you think bullying impacted your characters?

Will, answering smoothly. :it made Will afraid and definitely played a part in making him hide his feelings-

Matt, breathing a sigh of relief.: good-

Noah: Which is why I love that they talk about this next season. Really helps set things up.

Ross, putting his hands up.: Wait, no-

Finn: yeah, that scene was really tough to film. Especially since you can just feel the romantic tension here.

Noah, snickering and giggling :Finn was basically giving me heart eyes.

Ross, screaming into his hands.

January 31st 2025

Finn and Noah are at their hotel in Paris, having a video call with the Duffers.

Matt: ”Okay boys, let’s practice this. We’ll ask you possible questions and you answer them without spoiling too much.”

Finn and Noah: ”Yes, sir!”

Ross: ”Finn, how would you describe Mike’s relationship with Eleven this season?”

Finn: ”What relationship? Wait- oh shit! I mean, it might have changed a bit, um… I don’t really remember- I mean I haven’t filmed with Millie that much- wait no no no let me try again…”

Noah: *falling off the bed and cackling on the floor*

Feel free to continue this thread ⬇️

[gleafer]

I played with some Twitter friends! Enjoy!

I draw what you ask, but not what you’re expecting!

[faramirsonofgondor]

I need a movie where Misha Collins plays a gay angel that falls in love with a bisexual cowboy played by Jensen Ackles. Their names are Cassius and Daniel, Cas and Dan. Jared Padalecki plays Daniel’s younger brother, Samson. It’s a blatant ripoff of SPN. The quality is extremely shitty and the budget was $40. Misha is wearing a pair of shitty $12 angel wings from Amazon and a cardboard halo. Jensen has a water gun instead of a real one. For some reason Samson is a mime, dressed in full mime ensemble, and breaks the fourth wall via miming his frustration about how Daniel and Cassius won’t get together. It has a laugh track and uses those “oohs” and “ahhs” and gasps that were in those early 2000s disney channel shows. Whenever Daniel shoots his gun you just hear Jensen making “pew pew pew pew” noises as red water squirts out.

[cassandracain52]

Reverse trope

where instead of the Bats forgetting that they’re adopted (something actual adoptees do on occasion and is hilarious) they forget that some of them *cough Damian cough* aren’t

_______

Jason in the heat of a probably ridiculous argument: Yeah well YOU’RE adopted!

Tim just as invested in said argument: So are YOU! We all are!

Damian who had previously been quietly watching this unfold while he drank his tea: Actually I’m not

Tim and Jason who didn’t realize he was there but are already DoneTM: …… Damian continuing to sip his tea entirely unbothered: :)

Damian: Because I’m not an orphan-

Jason: ok, yoU KNOW WHAT-

____

or like in their group texts (that we know they have thanks to Nightwing (2016) #79)

*Steph changed the group chat name to “Bruce Wayne’s Personal Orpanage”*

Jason: Really?

Steph: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Steph: It’s the truth Damian: Both my parents are very much alive

Steph: Shhh you don’t count

Cass: Mine too Duke: Technically so are mine

Barbara: I still have a dad so there’s that

Steph: YOU GUYS ARE RUINING THE JOKE

Tim: Stephanie aren’t BOTH of your parents alive???

Steph: KNOW WHAT? FINE

*Steph changed the group chat name to “The Technicality Police”*

Tim: well that’s more accurate at least

Steph: :)

_____

Damian in his 10th argument with Tim of the day: That’s- this is-

Tim in full Antagonizing Big Brother mode: I’m listening

Damian -a Gen Z and best friend to Jon Kent- extremely frustrated: This is such Motherless behavior!

Tim taken aback: [voice cracking] W-what-?

Damian who didn’t mean to say that but doubling down anyway because his bloodline doesn’t believe in admitting mistakes: THIS! This is such Motherless behavior!

The rest of the family who is also motherless: :O

Cass whose been spending way too much time with Meme Queen Stephanie Brown and not involved in the argument but finding it entertaining regardless: [nodding along seriously] Facts

Tim: [visibly betrayed] CASS WHAT-

A video copy of the interaction gets sent out anonymously to the entire family. Barbara is the prime suspect but there is no proof as of yet (and they will never find any)

Steph, Cass, and Duke continue to respond “Motherless behavior” everytime one of the bats does something they deem questionable/insane. It is said often

It only stops when one night in the middle of patrol. Batman is in full Dark Knight mode (possibly in the middle of threatening someone) and descends from the ceiling into the middle of a warehouse drug deal, dark cape billowing out behind him-

and Steph just automatically whispers “Motherless behavior” forgetting her com was still very much on

She immediately realizes what she said and frantically apologizes but it’s too late.

Bruce just- Blue Screens. Completely stunned into silence

Dick -who was unfortunate enough to be the one teamed up with Batman tonight- is fighting for his life to choke back his laughter

Jason doesn’t even try to stop his and has collapsed to his knees from lack of air from how hard he’s laughing. Cass try’s half heartedly patting his back to help to no avail

The criminals are terrified into surrender from The Red Hood just laughing hysterically at seemingly nothing while Batman just Stands There

Damian ends up being the only one still functioning enough to continue arresting everyone, though he is privately amused and strangely proud

Tim and Barbara have saved both the com recordings and cowl footage to at least three different servers and sent it to absolutely everyone before Batman even recovers

Duke finds out second hand the next morning and is furious he missed the chance to see it in person. He declares he is moving to the nightshift so it doesn’t happen again. (He is all talk and goes to bed by 9 pm)

Bruce bans the phrase for life and promises swift and server punishment to anyone who dares to use it again

[k-n0-x]

Pov: The Hazbin residents playing Uno

Y/N: "Skip!" *Places down skip next person card*

Lucifer: "I swear, the next time you skip me, I am going to FUCK YOU"

Charlie, quite embarrased: "Again, it's 'fuck you up’, Dad"

Lucifer: "I know what I said"

Everyone else at the table:

[sweeneydino]

Quick change.

[zorosleftmantit101]

One piece men reacting to you telling them.

"-You make my heart feel warm"

Characters: Luffy, Zoro, Sanji, kid, killer, buggy, crocodile, corazon, shanks, ace, sabo, mihawk, smoker, Katakuri

A/N: Thought I should probably throw in some fluff a lil bit of crack.

I made Sabo a lil french man ❤️

C/W: fluff, Swearing, mentions of heart attacks, mentions of telling ppm to kts.

Luffy:

"Are you having a heart attack?"

Zoro:

"me?" Staring at you with disbelief.

"No Zoro the fucking wall... yes you!"

Growls and pouts at you being an ass but will pull you into his lap.

"You make my heart feel warm too~"

"What was that Zoro?"

"NOTHING I UHH TOLD YOU TO KILL YOURSELF!"

Sanji:

What are you gonna say at my funeral now that you've killed me.

"A loving partner and a strong fighter, Sanji will br forever missed"

Sanji

2004- 2023

Death by nose bleed/s

Kid:

"Yeah well your a shit."

Your sad cause you was just tryna be a cutie

Dw I got you come to me *licks lips deviously*

As your walking away all sad Kid yanks your arm so your sitting on his lap.

"I guess you make my heart feel things too, but dont go letting that get to your head!"

Killer:

"Oh cool didn't know I could do that"

He's not dumb he's just being a dickhead on purpose to get a reaction out of you.

Buggy:

"I do? I- uhhh I mean OF COURSE I DO I AM THE GREAT MPPH-"

Shut this man up with a massive smooch or a fist to the face your choice.

Crocodile:

"Is that so darling~"

His calloused fingers motion for you to come forward.

Walking towards him as he sits at his desk he pulls your hand into his brining it to his lips.

"Your so cute doll, one day im going to put a ring on this finger make you mine- make your heart only warm for me~"

Mihawk:

"Ok"

Corazon:

Grabs your wrist kissing it while smiling before twirling you and dipping yoy in his embrace

"Mm you make me heart bloom like the flowers in a thousand springs my love~"

You where ready to ravish the man right there if he didn't trip sending the two of you crashing to the floor..

Ace:

"Say on god"

Sabo:

"You flatter me Mademoiselle, my heart warms at your affection as well"

Shanks:

"Thats kinda gay"

Smoker:

"Oh thats nice umm you make my heart feel... umm..."

*proceeds to walk away out of sheer embarrassment*

Katakuri:

"Are you /srs or /j"

[webshood]

Wayne's social media where all Tim does is be everyone's 1# hater (accidentally deleted it lol)

It always backfires with Bruce