#sexuality theory

[leikeliscomet]

I'm gonna be completely honest I'm starting to get tired of people going 'aces can have sex' 'asexuality is a SPECTRUM' in my reblogs every time I post about asexuality where I literally haven't implied or said otherwise and I've honestly thought about deleting some of them. Like... I know guys. I know. I'm either speaking on my own experience which isn't sex favourable or from a Black and/or lesbian POV of asexuality which would include sex favourable aces anyway so it should go without saying.

It's getting similar to how I see 'lesbians can have sex with men'. I'm fully aware lesbians have the physical means to do so, but I wouldn't wanna hear that in a lesbian space for centring the experiences of people who don't, especially lesbians who were coerced and/or forced into doing so. As long as lesbophobia exists, that statement can't be neutral and the wider context will always shape how I see it. I don't need to be reminded I can conform to the thing I'm actively going against. I don't want to and I can't.

We can acknowledge how diverse and varied a community is but it's disingenuous to pretend there's a single uniform experience throughout. Going 'everyone is valid' is cute but it doesn't address the specific problem, which is compulsory sexuality. In this case, the constant need to derail sex repulsed, averse and indifferent aces in our own posts and conversations does compulsory sexuality's job for it. I'm reminded of my 'wasted' sexual potential on a regular basis I don't need my own community doing it too.

As respectfully as possible, not every single asexual post is gonna personally represent you. I don't go into aro spaces and expect to be centred or represented because those weren't made for me and that's okay. Asexuality is a wide spectrum with lots of sides. I'm not part of all those sides and that's okay.

[oasisr]

yes i am a prude, and hypersexuality is ruining friendships, relationships and society as a whole.

[dreamerdrop]

My issue with writing Julian POV is that I don’t think Julian is actually self-aware enough to realise how mind-blowingly attracted to Garak he actually is, no.

I think he would be in denial about it conciously, because Garak is a dangerous Cardassian who may or may not be a spy. Julian would filter his attraction through whatever justifications he can for why he’s not ~really~ attracted to him. (While blushing and being flustered by Garak’s overt attraction and flirting back like his life depends on it for reasons he will conveniently brush over in his head.)

But you see, I cannot conceive that anyone could ever, ever look at Garak and not immediately be overcome with lust that makes them dizzy. I can’t imagine having someone who looks like that approach so blatantly flirty and not just immediately following them back to their store to do whatever the fuck they tell you for as long as they want.

So it’s very hard for me to write Julian not being immediately on his knees for Garak because it baffles me that he didn’t just throw himself at Garak over the table in that replimat to begin with.

Maybe it’s my bizarre taste in men talking but how did this scene not end with Julian following him back to his store and being like “Yes, sir, what do you want to do with me, sir”.

[mikakuna]

this is one of the arkham knight audio files where jason kinda breaks down to barbara and it's SO SAD. the way his voice shakes and gets smaller like a child's when talking about what joker did to him gets me so bad :(

[track-staryaz]

Happy Pride to one of the bi characters of all time

[smoky-mountain-ghost]

WONDERLUST EP. 3 SPOILERS ⚠️

trammelton lougferd?

SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER

shoutout to the person who made the theory of aeon getting to troy before blink did because holy shit my mind is BLOWN.

there’s no confirmation that it WAS Aeon, but it was a female figure, mysterious and whatnot, AND she wanted Troy to find Blink specifically. we learned that Blink and Aeon have a history and i really wonder what she wants with Blink.

the snake guy in the background IS interesting and i don’t think there are any theories as to who it could be unless there was a mention of another vixen with the body of a snake…

i also wonder how she knew troy’s full name. like i know he’s pretty famous on the surface so she must be keeping tabs on the more prestigious families AND must be in contact with at least a few…

ugh i love jrwi

(getting gillion dungeon trial arc flashbacks)

[pinksmonkey]

Posting my Ultimate Byler Evidence/Analysis List here directly because it probably makes it more convenient and I should have done this a while ago. XD

There is so much proof for Byler being endgame in S5 of Stranger Things. They are so cute together, and so much in the show has been building up to their relationship. I just wanted to share some of my favourite Byler analyses, because they are so cool, detailed, and in-depth. I love reading about all the hints, symbolism, and subtext for Byler, it's amazing how much thought must have been put into all these things. Why go through all the effort of adding these details if they aren't actually going anywhere with them? Mike is so queercoded, and they are truly in love with each other.

🫥 Just gonna leave some good Byler analyses here 🤐

Most of the links go to written Tumblr posts, and a couple of them are Reddit posts. So it's a lot of reading. If you prefer watching videos over reading, I highlighted my Byler YouTube playlist in green so it's easy to find.

And apologies for any of the links that aren't working, I know some of the posts have been deleted now sadly, but there's no way I'm re-numbering all these so I'm just leaving them in. My fellow Bylers, please stop deleting your amazing posts. ;-;

So anyway, here is the list of some of my favourite Byler evidence/analyses of all time (not in any particular order):

1. Mike's Season 4 Monologue To El

2. Camera Roll Byler Proof Part 3

3. Mike's Monologue and Milkvan

4. Mostly Byler Post Index

5. Dawson's Creek Parallel

6. "My Experience With Stranger Things"

7. What Ollie Learned From Film School

8. Byler Music Analysis

9. Why Don't The Duffers Discuss This?

10. ST Theories Masterpost

11. If Byler Isn't Endgame Then Someone Screwed Up

12. Byler Crumbs From The Cast and Crew

13. Favourite Combination of Endgame Byler Proof

14. I Doubt Byler Then I Remember This

15. The Fact That We Have This Interview

16. You Know Your Ship is Endgame When

17. Mostly Byler Post Index 2

18. Losing Hope Of Byler Endgame?

19. Why I Think Byler is Endgame

20. So Many Thoughts on This

21. Mike's Wall Art

22. Painting Miscommunication Leading to Mike's Monologue Coded

23. Yes, That Scene Did Foreshadow Mike's Monologue as Disingenuous

24. Mike's Monologue Didn't Sit Right With Me

25. Blue And Yellow Pen

26. That Tweet Is So Sweet

27. Heart Eyes, Literally

28. "My Process of Realizing Byler is Real"

29. Looking at Will, Not El

30. High School Musical Parallel

31. Said It Before and I'll Say It Again

32. Delusional Milkdud?

33. ST Writers Twitter Analysis 1

34. ST Writers Twitter Analysis 2

35. For When You Are Doubting Byler

36. Is Mike Bi or Gay?

37. Fully Convinced

38. The Ultimate Byler Playlist (my Byler YouTube playlist)

39. 100% Confident

40. Mike in S4 and S2

41. Mike Is Angry With Himself

42. It's Been A Year, Mike

43. Rink-O-Mania Remodel

44. The Development Of Will And Mike's Relationship

45. Mike's Lies

46. El Was Holding So Much In

47. Flickergate + Lettergate

48. Did Mike Ever Like El Romantically?

49. Mike Is Stupid

50. Byler Won't Write Itself

51. What's The Alternative Explanation?

52. Comparing Mileven and Byler

53. It Was Always About Them

54. Mike Is Not Ok

55. He Has A Love Interest

56. Will's Happy Ending

57. Trying To Be Normal

58. It's Not That Milevens Are Homophobic

59. Byler Is Reality

60. A Proper Look At El's Shrine To Mike

61. Mileven Through The Seasons

62. Suspicious

63. I Can't Doubt Byler

64. D&D Soulmates

65. Let's Talk Phones

66. Not Delusional

67. What Do They Want?

68. The Main Character

69. Mike's Mental Health

70. So Close

71. This Look Confirms Byler Isn't One Sided

72. Mileven Is Bones

73. They Don't Care About Mileven?

74. The Airport Hug Will Always Be Famous

75. The Monologue Mystery, Why Did They Lose?

76. The Cabin Scene

77. Why Couldn't Mike Say It For 2 Seasons?

78. He Was Trying To Find Will

79. Mike The Surfer Boy

80. Mike Definitely Shows Attraction To Girls

81. The Cast Knows

82. Mileven Loses On All Fronts

83. The Bouquet

84. 53 Minutes And 5 Seconds

85. Pink Panther

86. El And Choice

87. Will's Spotify Playlist

88. He'll Come Crawling Back To You, Begging For Forgiveness

89. Mike's Character Arc Prediction

90. It's The Same Look

91. Will's Truly Happy Ending

92. That's The Same Look, Right?

93. You're The Heart

94. Mike And El's Relationship In S4 Was Really Weird

95. Fireworks Parallel

96. Mileven Has Been Built Up For 4 Seasons

97. Not Stupid: The Fate of Mileven and Byler

98. This Suddenly Makes So Much Sense

99. Metaphors In Filmmaking

And unfortunately Tumblr will only let me add 100 links per post, so when I've posted part 2 of this list, I'll link it here: Part 2

[whereserpentswalk]

Ending the sexualization of women on film won't happen when female characters are completely covered from the neck down and shot as conservatively as possible with the camera treating their bodies like forbidden fruit, it will happen when a female action hero can appear entirely shirtless and have it be shot as entirely badass and powerful just like how it would for a male action hero.

[leikeliscomet]

Asexual theory 101

Right I keep getting asked on most of my asexual posts 'What does this mean OP? Where's the sources?' so imma make a quick ace theory 101 post so if anyone says they don't get it I can say I tried. Let's go:

'What does being ace have to do with race/racism?/There's racism in the ace community???'

Pretty much everything as people of colour experience various forms of sexualisation and desexualisation at the same time, which is why POC are rarely included in asexual representation:

Asexuals of Color Still Seek to Validate Their Asexuality by Ebony Purks

Stereotypes & media about Black masculinity made it harder to come out as asexual by Tyger Songbird

Your Assumptions About Black Queer Masculinity Are Erasing My Asexual Identity by Timinepre Cole

It's Time To Start Celebrating Black Asexuality in Media By Tyger Songbird

Yasmin Benoit: ‘People had a hard time believing that I could be Black and asexual and at Pride’ by Alastair James

Brown and Gray: An Asexual People of Color Zine

'What do TERFS/transphobia have to do with asexuality?'

There's a growing TERF conspiracy theory that asexuality is the side-effect of transitioning. The LGB movement believes the community is exclusively for 'same-sex attracted persons' and so identities that don't involve attraction e.g. the TQIA should be removed. Most backlash towards Yasmin Benoit, aroace activist, is from white TERFs and conservatives:

Acephobic conspiracy theories have transphobic and fascist roots by Sherronda J Brown

'But how can conservatives hate asexuality if they hate sex?'

Because they don't and never did. If the term 'puritan' was used correctly in modern internet discourse, it would be known Christian puritans believe heterosexual sex for reproduction is a gift from god and mandatory so being asexual doesn't exactly fit with that worldview. Their beef is with any form of sex and sexuality that falls outside of cis heterosexual marriage, including asexuality. They're not anti sex but anti sexual autonomy:

"Anti-Sex" and the Real Sexual Politics of the Right by Lee Cicuta (ButchAnarchy)

The religious right is now targeting sexless marriages as “selfishness.” They Want to Ban Those Too by Tyger Songbird

Asexual people targetted by right-wing pundits following landmark report by Harriet Brewis

'What does being ace have to do with gender?'

It's commonly assumed that because patriarchy shames women's sexualities and considers all men's sexuality as biological and unavoidable, that ace women only and exclusively experience dsexualisation whilst ace men only and exclusively are pressured into being sexual beings. This can true as a broad overview but it can vary based on race, disability, class etc. This also becomes complex for asexuals that exist outside the gender binary. This is known as 'gender detachment'.

Impossible for Men, Unremarkable for Women by Canton Winer

My Work on Gender Detachment and Asexuality Strikes a Nerve by Canton Winer

'There's asexual studies now?'

Yup. On the general experiences of asexual people in the UK, including discrimination in education, the workplace and healthcare:

The National LGBT Survey (2018)

Ace in the UK Report (2023)

Specific names:

Asexual theorists: Ianna Hawkins, Michael Paramo, Julia Sondra Decker, Canton Winer (non-ace), Sherronda J Brown, Angela Chen

Asexual activists: Yasmin Benoit, Tyger Songbird, Marshall Blount (TheGentleAce), Kimberly Butler (TheAsexualGoddess)

And I'm gonna update this with more if they're worth adding. I don't wanna hear any excuses anymore or blame towards aces of colour, gay aces or trans aces for not being specific enough anymore. Read!

[paulic]

Never forget when Howard Stern said to Paul that his sexuality was so powerful over John that Paul “could have his way with him” and Paul just looked at his finger nails and said “well…💅” or “wooow 💅” and after Stern went on, Paul said “well you know I mean, I like that theory”

[bloodfreak-boyking]

this is how that scene went right

[aro-culture-is]

aro culture is getting really annoyed with the relationships unit in your sociology class because the whole thing is just 100% amatonormativity.

:\

if think your teacher, professor, and/or TAs might be interested in discussing the concept, I have some idea of bringing up the topic?

I'd personally say something like, "Hi, During our section in sociology around relationships, I couldn't help but think it would be interesting to discuss how a sociological theory called "amatonormativity" might relate to these lessons. I gathered a few sources from the professor who coined it, a thesis written on it, and a law review written about the connection between it and laws in the USA. There's some connections between its use in feminist thought and in queer theories, and I'd love to know your thoughts about it. I personally was thinking of when [specific statement] was said, and how I would apply this theory. I hope it's as interesting to you as it is to me."

Coiner's current webpage: https://elizabethbrake.com/amatonormativity/

Thesis: https://vc.bridgew.edu/honors_proj/330/ (click download in upper right hand corner for the PDF, depending on the individual it may be worth downloading and sending that rather than a link)

Law Review: https://uclawreview.org/2022/06/09/amatonormativity-in-the-law-an-introduction/

[byler-invested]

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles x Stranger Things official comic

Be prepared, because… there’s…..….

A LOT.

> “11 o’clock” in focus for no reason (Eleven symbolizes Will’s closet, internalised homophobia, innocence, virginity).

> open yellow curtain (probably signifies Will coming out in s5).

> “theme for the day” (meaning this sequence is thematic of something: Will’s trauma and coming of age).

> “Do whatever you want. Go see Mike and the boys… it’s up to you” (this refers to the perceived freedom of Will coming out or starting his sexual life).

> “not a trick?” (It is a trick unfortunately…)

> “Nope. I’ll even be your chauffeur if you need me. That means I’ll drive.” (gay top subtext)

> “For once, freedom is on the other side of that door. And it’s all yours.” (!!! — someone coercing Will into the gay sexual lifestyle before he’s ready or in an unsafe manner).

> Eggos and maple syrup are Mike coded. But orange juice is NOT! Mike would drink and is associated to white milk. This is a subtle hint that something’s WRONG.

“Technical” meaning in s5 they will start to delve into the mythology of the series.

But also… sexual subtext.

> “Time to get a move on, kid. Go before I realize this is a huge mistake” (something or someone coercing Will into letting go of heteronormativity and virginity).

> “It won’t… open”, “Just give it a push. You get everything you’ve ever wanted and you’re going to let a door stop you? There you go. Put some muscle into it.” (clearly subtext about coming out and first sexual experience from a bottom’s perspective).

Dustin is Jonathan in s5 when he realizes Will is being manipulated/ coerced by some guy.

The alarmed/ surprised turtle on the right is Lucas.

Raph (on the left) is Mike— he’s PISSED. Jealous Mike absolutely CONFIRMED.

> “Most importantly… why does Stockman want to open a gate, and why do they need him hooked up to that machine, too?” Lucas is absolutely shocked that the top (it’s his former basketball teammate Chance) is into guys and that Will, of all people, would be into Chance.

> “There are no good reasons to open a gate. They’re always bad.” Jonathan is protective of his little brother to whom he also represents a father figure. To him, it can never be good that Will’s having a sexual experience.

> “Maybe that machine is using her powers against her?” Meaning Chance is a dark mirror/ foil of Mike and one of the made-up characters we’ve been talking about.

> “Where are you going, Raph?” Lucas is surprised that Mike is so pissed and already springing into action (he won’t have come out at this point).

> “I’m gonna do the rescuing!” White Knight paladin Mike moment.

> “You can’t pull Eleven out. The mind is fragile.” (Will is in a vulnerable situation).

> “Donny, relax. I wasn’t talking about rescuing the girl”. This is the writers telling us this is all a metaphor and they’re not talking about Eleven, but Byler. They even make a point of showing us a bunch of Byler and Mike-coded stuff in the next image: two crossed swords, a walkie-talkie, Mike’s backpack and a huge phallic object…

> Mike makes use of his coding/ programming skills (Alan Turing reference).

> “Well, the two of them are definitely linked”. Mike and Chance are linked in some way.

> “Wait, so this whole thing is designed to create a big illusion? To feed Eleven a lie?” The writers referring to their gigantic five season long straightbait but also, manifestation theory IKTR.

> “Only those inside can shut down the projection”. Like I suspected, the scientists fucked up and Brenner as the lab leader was probably the one who made this decision of ‘trapping’ everyone in the simulation. Also subtext for “only those in Will’s trust and heart can shut down his illusion” aka Mike.

> Nice reference to The Cabin in the Woods movie there in the first pic (heavily recommend).

> Mike doesn’t even ask anyone and just brutally storms in to interrupt whatever Will and Chance are doing.

> We could even infer that his extreme jealousy straight up brutally OUTS Mike, not only to the audience, but maybe also to other characters. He unintentionally crashes down his own closet…

> “That’s not your friend.” Mike telling Will this about Chance.

> The background changes to orange as the villain (Chance) loses his disguise/ farce.

> “Fine, I’ll gladly stop pretending to be this buffoon.” Chance stops pretending to be nice and/or is revealed to be a Vecna/ Mindflayer trap.

> “Like it or not… this place is mine”. Mike and Chance will fight and compete for Will.

Note: Chance is heavily associated with orange even in the show, because of being a Tiger in the basketball team.

TAKEAWAY:

Unfortunately, I think at some point in s5— besides the supernatural plotline— we are about to witness Will delve into real unhealthy coping mechanisms (prematurity, hypersexuality, low self-worth and/or drugs) and reliving the trauma with his father (attraction to unhealthy people, as Chance will remind Will of a mix of both Mike and Lonnie).

These are extremely common results of CSA in many people.

Jonathan, Lucas and especially Mike will save him.

There’s a lot more. I just picked some of the most incriminating pages lmfao. And I’ll leave you with this Paladin Mike bonus:

If you wanna read more ⬇️

masterpost:

part 1:

part 2:

[pinksmonkey]

I'm deciding to post a link to specifically my Byler Evidence YouTube playlist, because it is in my ultimate list, but this will make it easier for people to find who just want to watch videos and not read hundreds of posts. XD

Have fun I guess. Share this if you want. Byler is so endgame fr fr.

[starspangledbatter]

⭐️ TADC Twitter is something else right now. Out of curiosity, I go under the Digital Circus tag and witness Marissa discussing Gangle shipping discourse, Gooseworx telling the fandom to behave because of said shipping discourse, and even more shipping discourse involving Ribbun, Abstragedy, RagaPom, and RagaOrbs 😭. What happened over the weekend? How did all of this escalate after a 51 second trailer? I think we should reconsider three things: ⭐️

1. Anyone can be shipped with anyone. Have at it, go crazy. Like or dislike a ship, it’s all good. Just don’t harass people over who they paid with who.

2. The RagaOrbs theory is simply just a theory. I know some Ragatha lesbian believers don’t like this theory and while that is valid, don’t spread negativity towards the theorist because of it. It’s all good fun. Plus, Ragatha doesn’t have to be straight or gay. Bisexuality/Pansexuality exists >:D.

3. Let us be a good fandom. Let’s agree to disagree and respect the thoughts of others. It’s not right to see well-meaning people being harassed for their own opinions. As long as they aren’t harming anyone, why be offended?