#relationship anarchy

[pacificseaotter]

genuinely think everyone would benefit from learning about aromanticism and relationship anarchy. even straight, allosexual, alloromantics. because amatonormativity affects everyone, and learning about relationship anarchy and redefining how you think about relationships is so freeing. youcan do whatever you want 4ever.

[sminny-wew]

It's so funny being a shipper when you're aroace it's like you're an anthropologist, like hey fictional blorbos who live in my head let me study your bonds under a microscope and take notes on what happens when I throw Valentines Day into your enclosure

[marshmellowed]

aros, aces, and allies put DOWN the ship discourse we need to talk about family abolition, single tax, romantic harassment, and relationship anarchy im so serious

[aroaceenjolras]

I think we should like, encourage people to be wacky and incomprehensible in how they discuss their close relationships it's literally the only thing that'll save us from amatonormativity. Make up words. Don't be limited to "oh that's my partner/spouse/qpp/ et cetera." If none of those words make you feel something then find one that does. Even if you have to invent it.

[agrebel18]

i love you polyamorous relationships, open relationships, friends with benefits/friends that have sex with each other, queerplatonic relationships, friendships that have some weird queer element to it, relationship anarchy, staying single and i love anything that doesn't match what society considers "normal"

[runwiththerain]

more people need to be aware of the term alterous attraction (a desire for a close emotional connection with someone, but it's not completely romantic or platonic) and use it instead of calling everything a qpr. because by calling everything a qpr you are turning that term into a label instead of what it actually is - an umbrella term for many non conventional types of relationships.

[voidpunk-aro]

people act like it’s a flaw that qprs are difficult to define and confusing to allos as if that’s not half the fun! y’know those memes that are like “are you a boy or a girl?” followed by “no” / “yes”??? qprs are that energy but for relationships and for some reason we’ve still got folks trying to pretend that’s not nifty as fuck

[underwhelmingalchemist]

"There's no platonic explanation for this" there is if you're aromantic enough about it, hope this helps!

[arotechno]

welcome to "what relationship is it anyway" where the rules are made up and the points don't matter

[buildingrelationshipsinanarchy]

So through my university I've been able to get my hands on a lot of scholarly research around, nonmonogamies, polyamory, sexuality and all sorts of gender, race, class intersections on those topics.

Anybody interested in me posting them? Maybe even commenting on them as well?

[aropride]

i’ve begun saying people “obviously aren’t in a romantic relationship, they have something deeper and more intimate going on” as this seems to confuse and upset alloromantics

(ID: a banner with text over the aro flag. the text says: i don't care about blorbotags go wild but this post is about hating the hierarchial system of relationships & if you're mad about it you're probably been poisoned by ace discourse brainworms. and are also proving my point. /end ID)

[matcha-milo]

I want a relationship that is completely undefinable by any existing labels or words. Like, we're so close and we hug and kiss each other's foreheads and cuddle and travel and explore together, and we get along so well and have so much in common. But at the same time, our relationship isn't fully romantic or fully platonic; it's a completely separate, open-to-interpretation thing that we tweaked as needed, and we have our own boundaries and things we are and aren't comfortable with, and we respect each other in every way, shape, and form.

[read-write-thrive]

platonic and romantic are not some sort of binary that relationships have to be divided into. they’re not even two ends of a linear spectrum. they’re fully just abstract concepts made up of culturally-dependant social behaviour and expectations that are continually forced upon people to reinforce religious, legal, and broader societal/cultural norms, often and repeatedly to the detriment of non-normative groups including, but not limited to, the queer community. and I am sick and tired of those norms being replicated in fucking fandom discourse, of all places

[heartless-aro]

Dismantling the relationship hierarchy is not about rearranging it so that sexual and romantic relationships are devalued while QPRs become the new “more than friends.” We need to completely do away with the idea that relationships exist on a fixed hierarchy. Some people will consider friend(s) or a zucchini/QPP the most important part of their life. For some people, their most important relationship will be a sexual relationship (and not necessarily one which includes romance!). And some people will still consider their romantic partner the most important person in their life, and that’s fine too.

Just as it’s harmful to tell an aroace person that romantic and sexual relationships are the most important ones, it’s also harmful to tell an alloaro person that sex is inherently less important than romance or to tell an alloromantic aplatonic person that friendship is inherently more important than romance. There is no way to rank relationships that will not devalue the experiences of at least one group of people, nor is there any reason why we need to rank relationships in the first place.

[sleepyjuice-juice]

high key would LOVE to write a story between two aroaces and put them into situations that are widely perceived as romantic. just to make the audience question the way they view love and relationships. just a sprinkle of relationship anarchy... oh whoops i accidentally poured out the whole tank of relationship anarchy on them let's see what happens

[aro-absol]

You know what I like so much about the aromantic community?

We have so many concepts that the average alloromantic person has never heard of. Concepts that make it so much easier to explain our experiences, desires and struggles to other people. They make it so much easier to exist as an aromantic person in this world. Of course, every aromantic person can decide whether they find these concepts helpful and applicable to their experiences. But I find it amazing how many cool concepts the aromantic community either came up with or took pre-existing concepts and made them our aromantic 101. I don't think the allos really get how being aromantic can fundamentally change your worldview. And to be honest, I think they're missing out because I think everyone would benefit from at least being familiar with those concepts.

Being aromantic is basically like this:

Aromantic shrimp colours are real.

Anyways, aromantic community, y'all mean a lot to me and I'm so happy I found y'all and now share your "secret" knowledge!