#people miss the point of his character so hard so consistently

[idolomantises]

People keep asking me why didn’t I just make a new character instead of changing Domino’s design so much and I’m gonna be blunt:

Because I didn’t like his original design.

I know people do miss the general simplicity of the older designs, but those old designs weren’t made with a lot of thought to them.

Back then, these comics were just for fun, I had no idea what I was planning for them. I didn’t even know what the Cherubs were doing, I just wanted to draw cool animal characters. So I changed their outfits to better represent their status and personalities.

I was honestly kind of surprised I got praise on reddit in defense of the old designs saying they were “otherworldly” because honestly a lot of these outfits were half assed 💀. I was literally drawing them as I was making the comics. even when sketching out some designs like Ciel, I legit had nothing to work with because I didn’t even know what his job was, hence why his outfit is kind of sexy. Because he was just… sexy bird angel.

But with Domino, it was a lot more complex than that. I wasn’t just unhappy with his original outfits, his overall designs no longer fit what I had planned for him. He was originally a one off joke turned gag character with not much depth to him, just someone for Sera to bounce off of that wasn’t overly antagonistic to her.

Over time I ended up settling on a personality and backstory for him and I didn’t really think it reflected well on his current design. I also was just not fond of it personally, I know a lot of people really liked it, but it felt too cute. Domino is cute but the point of his character (at least in the reworks) is that he’s inconsistent, erratic and kind of dangerous. He can also be kind of unsettling. Inconsistency not just in personality but in design as well. I wanted him to feel a bit more androgynous rather than simply femme. During this time I was also finalizing on a consistent designing theme for the angels and I settled on lower ranked angels appearing more human, hence why Domino was given a nose and mouth.

Domino kind of lives a double life hence I wanted a design that better reflects that. The quiet, reserved actor that’s fawned over by his fans and the pathetic, emotional wreck that Sera and co are very familiar with.

I know people liked his original design. It’s still very cute and I do look fondly on it, but I just don’t love it the same way other people do. I do hope eventually people learn to love the new design as much as the original, it’s such a massive change that I understand why it’s something that’s hard for people to really wrap their heads around or even like.

But yeah. Please just give new domino a chance, I swear the change was necessary 👍

[kithmet]

see, i really love when buddie fight. i love it because within fighting (and especially because their dynamic relies heavily on the unspoken) there's this element of, "oh, finally they're communicating, even if it's fighting! they're saying these things out loud! progression is being made!" and it's not pretty, but life isn't always pretty. i love the messiness of a satisfying fight, where both are dealing with their own shit and misstepping how they're handling a situation, or throwing words around carelessly, or projecting onto each other. people who love each other as much as they do don't go into an argument that intense without knowing that in the end, things will be okay again. buck even said this in s4: "it's easy to lash out on the person that you know is always going to forgive you." i think subconsciously they know that sure, they might fight, but they will always be okay.

that being said. yeah, i love when they fight, but i do often hate how people talk about it. there's always this strange element of viewers trying to choose sides, which completely misses the point the show is trying to make whenever it depicts raw emotions and how those complicated feelings can intersect in relationships to spark conflict, conflict where nuance does exist. and this happens time and time again on the show and the aftermath—people are always so forgiving towards one of them, and less forgiving towards the other. yes, when times are tough, buck gets self-centred and unable to see past his own hurt, and yes, eddie hates seeing that gets mean about it. we've seen this during the lawsuit! we've seen it before eddie left for texas! and we're seeing it again now after bobby died. this is a consistent character trait for both of them, it's a thread that has remained true in their relationship and will probably continue to remain true because it's somewhere where they don't mesh well. it's juicy! but i don't think one of them is more or less right for feeling the way they do. the point is that they feel what they feel, and they get past it always despite clashing. and ultimately the whole concept of "choosing sides" when two characters clash is rooted in projection or relatability (or protection) of one character, which honestly lacks empathy and understanding of the fight itself, both character's motivations, and their relationship dynamics. the writers don't want you to choose sides. they want you to understand that sometimes situations are complicated and as humans, we butt heads but still love each other no matter what. it's really not a hard concept to grasp. and yet... we as a fandom go in circles about this topic every single time they fight.

[eyebulb]

It's funny sometimes to see a lot of the arguments against Stolitz being false perspectives that the characters themselves have.

Like.. For example.. That Stolas in some way manipulated Blitz into sex with the book he needed for his job.

That's what STOLAS believes. Not at first, but after Ozzie's he starts to question what kind of fucked up deal he got himself into and how cruel he must be towards Blitz.

It's not how Blitz sees it tho! He didn't mind the deal itself. The deal was a safety net for his complicated feelings. Yes he did need the book, but seeing the owl he likes having sex with and kinda might actually like even more than that was a bonus. But let's keep it strictly business so we don't involve complicated feelings here. Cus real feelings can hurt, but if it's business.. Well it's just business. He liked that business tho, so he freaks out when it's taken away.

Another one I see often is that Stolas was the one to make it all about sex at the point of their confrontation in The full moon.

And this is what Blitz saw. Sort of.. It's what Blitz told himself was the case.

The start of it is a messy business, and I stand firm in my belief that both are to blame for the deal being in place at all. Especially the sex part of it.

Stolas felt attraction towards Blitz from the start. He made a weird sex joke that he then abandoned in order to just talk to his oldest friend. Blitz however, don't really see them as friends per se and is there to steal the book, and hey "this guy is attracted to me, I can totally use that" he thinks and starts flirting.

Stolas experiences a gay panic and starts backing off but Blitz keeps going until eventually Stolas gives in and goes with it. Then follows a night of passionate fornication that changes Stolas' whole view on life and seems to also change something for Blitz, at least in regards to how he sees Stolas. They both liked the sex, but they have a slightly different view of the relationship that follows.

Blitz can't for several reasons fathom that Stolas could see Blitz in any other way than a sexual partner.. Whether that's cus of a fetish or whatever doesn't matter much. It's just not possible in his head that Stolas sees him in any other way.

In the beginning, Stolas feeds this unintentionally. By playfully calling him "little imp" and similar demeaning things (I don't count "impish little plaything" cus that was to feed into the roll of the scary demon royal in front of the humans. Like in mastermind).

Stolas seems to see their deal as a beginning of something more. He thinks they're on the same page and that there's something genuine there. It isn't until Ozzie's that he starts to realize what Blitz's interpretation is.

After that tho, Stolas changes his tactics. He looks to break the deal by getting the crystal and gives Blitz the choice of coming over instead of telling him to. In Oops, we also get a rant from Blitz about other ways Stolas has tried to show interest in him outside of sex. So come full moon, Stolas genuinely thinks that Blitz has gotten the hint but just can't see their relationship that way.

Blitz tho, can't get the hint cus he doesn't allow himself to. He refuses to believe in anything genuine and boils it down to a royal having their fun and playing with his feelings. Stolas is also not the most consistent person ever when he confronts things. If we read the texts in western energy we see a man scared shitless of confrontation that he keeps back paddling.. Which is the people pleaser's way and which makes it hard to interpret their genuine feelings. But he HAS tried to steer their relationship away from sex and into a more genuine connection.

So people claiming he's being hypocritical there misses the point in that he tried laying the groundwork for his confession in all of season 2. Seeing stars is the one time we see him flirt for real and I mean.. The guy is gay as hell.. Excuse him in his moment of weakness.

Blitz is blindsighted cus he convinced himself that every attempt Stolas made was fake. He needs to be backed into a corner with no excuses left in order to fully understand that Stolas is genuine. Which is why he comes back to fight in apology tour. He's still trying to get Stolas to "drop the mask" but.. Stolas doesn't have his mask on so obviously that doesn't happen.

So in conclusion.

Stolas didn't force Blitz into anything even tho Stolas himself believes it. Cus Blitz doesn't.

And Stolas didn't make it only about sex even tho Blitz believs it. Cus Stolas spent all of s2 trying to convince Blitz that there was more to his feelings than that and cut the sex part out of it completely.

[meguwumibear]

dominant!zayne x submissive!reader

tw for light BDSM, bondage/shibari, sex toys (vibrator), fingering, and some minor angst. mc calls zayne sir like twice. if i've missed something else that needs a tag, just ask! nondescript female reader with a bit of a backstory, just to make her feel more connected to the world.

Additional Disclaimer: Takes place after the events of the main story (which I am not fully caught up on). Reader is NOT the game MC in this fic. In my mind's eye MC decided to romance one of the other characters and Zayne does what he can to move on.

and yes, zayne's harness in the fic is 100% inspired by his harnes in the new trailer

In 2034 the world you as you know it ends. It happens suddenly one mundane spring afternoon. A great, gaping maw opens in the cloudless blue sky above Linkon City, releasing a tidal wave of ferocious monsters unto the earth. Locals come to call the event the Chronorift Catastrophe. The world later discovers that the great, gaping hole in the sky was the appearance of the first ever Deepspace Tunnel which attracted alien beings now colloquially referred to as Wanderers.

Everyone in Linkon City remembers where they were that day. They remember what they were wearing and who they were with. A flashbulb memory, the psychologists call it. A memory that endures. A memory that persists.

Like most survivors, it isn’t just the red rain falling from the sky or the horrible sound of the earth splitting around you that you remember: it’s the actions you took to survive. The people you ran past. The neighbors you didn’t save. The hand you didn’t extend to the woman who tripped over her own two feet running from the creature. The debris you didn’t help remove from the body of the elderly man too weak to push the plank away without aid.

For three weeks you see a therapist. You’re an adult now, still plagued by nightmares of the event. You tell the woman you’re meeting with that you are suffering from memories. She tells you that your body needs to learn that the danger has passed. The problem with that logic? The danger hasn’t. Your body can’t stop secreting stress hormones when your daily lunch breaks are constantly interrupted by Metaflux monsters.

Your past becomes a prison. An inescapable cage. Your therapists asks how you would feel if someone flung open the doors for you. You tell her it would depend on who opened the door and what’s happening outside.

The session before you ghost your shrink, she asks you to practice breathing exercises. She prattles on and on about the importance of nervous system regulation in trauma recovery. Apparently exhaling is supposed to activate the “rest and digest” response—the antidote to the “fight and flight” response that your body is stuck in.  

And that’s all well and good but even twenty years later the Wanders keep manifesting in Linkon City in numbers that the Hunters can’t keep up with. You’d move, maybe, if you had the means, though you did read somewhere once that a scared animal will continue to seek out their home, even if their home is no longer safe.

So you find an alternative way to cope with the stress of the new world.

There’s budding red light district about an hour outside the city. You go sometimes on weekends to decompress. Your favorite haunt is a small BDSM club run by a couple of old widows who lost their husbands to the war. They verify ages at the door and ensure all the drinks at the place stay virgin.

You’re not heavy into the scene or anything—you actually have quite a few hard limits—it’s just…nothing else you’ve tried has helped you to shut off your brain. To shift your focus from the past to the present. To shut out all thoughts of Hunters and Protocores and Wanders.

The doms you’ve had up until this point were perfectly adequate; they listened diligently to what you were open to and respected all of your boundaries. You aren’t sure why you’ve never asked for a more consistent routine with any of them. Something, somehow, was always missing from the encounters.

There are a lot of new faces at the club tonight. Or, rather, there are a lot of faces new to you. The club has many regulars, but you don’t make the hike often enough to have them all committed to memory. Still, you’re certain you’ve never seen the tall, stoic man in a leather harness swarmed by a gaggle of women before. Despite the fact that he clearly has his pick of the litter, your gaze keeps wandering to his solid form. The way his abs flex when he breathes. The way his lips quirk when he talks.

He's halfway across the room but must somehow still feel the heat of your wandering gaze because after a few stolen looks he locks eyes with you. Your whole body flushes as he acknowledges you with a raise of his drink. The tips of your ears burn as he takes a healthy swig of the beverage without breaking the eye contact. It’s you who looks away first.

When you chance a glance back over, he’s excusing himself from the women who flocked to him like a tourist attraction to pick his way towards you. Your heart flutters anxiously as he closes in, and you have to remind yourself not to take a step back once he’s close enough to touch.

“First time?” he asks, voice smooth like ice.

“Ouch,” you reply, gripping your own water glass to ground yourself. “It’s not. Do I really look that unaware.”

His expression doesn’t change but his eyes move to assess you, “What are you drinking?”

Though his tone is relaxed you can’t help but feel as if the question has a correct answer.

“Just water.”

“Hmm,” he hums. “Something with electrolytes would be more efficient. If you’re looking for a session tonight, that is.”

“I don’t like the taste,” you tell him, trying to keep the glass in your hand from shaking as desire swells within you.

He frowns, “Without electrolytes, your body will dehydrate, no matter how much water you consume.”

“You a doctor?” you ask.

He hums in what sounds like confirmation before wrapping his hand around yours. “I take the health of the people I play with seriously. This is about much more than sex to me. I like when my partners eat three square meals a day and have an effective exercise regimen implemented.”

You don’t resist when he slips your water from your grasp. You also don’t hesitate to open your mouth when he raises his own perspiring glass to your lips. His fingers don’t even graze you as you swallow down the fruity liquid, yet you can feel your insides come alight as you obey. As your pussy begins to leak it becomes increasing clear to you that you would do just about anything to have this man dominate you tonight.

“Good,” he says once you’ve downed the drink. “Now, do you happen to have a list of what you enjoy and your hard limits on you?”

With shaky hands, you reach wordlessly into your bag to retrieve what the man has asked for. He spends a few moments skimming the contents before simply stating, “I believe we are compatible.”

You follow him to a private room near the back of the club and watch as he begins to gather some equipment for the session. Without turning to look at you he says, “I noticed that you have some experience with light bondage. I prefer to use traditional single ply shibari rope or silk as restraints. These two methods prevent chafing and other potential complications like skin lesions or rashes. Do you have a preference for today’s session?”

“No preference, uh…” you trail off, wondering what the man would like you to refer to him as.

Sensing what’s on your mind, he offers, “I have no preferred titles, but you may assign me one if you like.”

“No preference, Sir,” you say, watching the man for his reaction. He seems unfazed by the moniker and continues to ready himself.

“Do you have any allergies or medical conditions I should be aware of?” he asks.

A lie forms on the tip of your tongue but the truth slips out anyway, “My heart’s a bit weak. Nothing serious. It didn’t develop properly when I was younger. I haven’t had any issues with it before.”

The revelation seems to give the man pause. He turns to you and motions for you to hold out your wrist for him, so you do. His warm fingers slip under your sleeve and find purchase on your pulse point. After a few excoriatingly silent minutes, you attempt to put his mind at ease.

“I’m, uh, a bit more excited than usual at the moment. My resting heart rate is probably higher than normal.”

The pads of his fingers don’t leave your wrist when he asks, “What’s your typical resting heart rate?”

You want to ask what that fucking matters, but sensing that won’t get you any closer to what you want you decide to humor the man. It’s been a while since you’ve been to a doctor. Back when they used to have you track it, the rate could vary depending on what task you were completing. It was higher, usually, when doing something strenuous. When you rested it would drop again.

“Usually around 90 beats per minute.”

His eyes flick to your face as he drops your wrist. “You should see a specialist.”

You roll your eyes impatiently, “Are we fucking or not?”

In response to your outburst, his hands find the hem of your shirt. “Who said I had any intentions of fucking you?” he asks, voice frustratingly emotionless. Your arms raise instinctually as he toys with the fabric, and the takes the opportunity to relieve you of the garment. “As I said before, this is about much more than sex to me.”

He circles behind you and draws you in close to him. It occurs to you suddenly just how much larger than you the man is. He rests his chin on your head as his fingers slowly trace down your sides, leaving a field of goosebumps in their wake. His hands make their way to the button on your pants.

“You aren’t just here for sex. Are you?” he asks, voice low. You feel the words vibrate his chest as he speaks them.

“No,” you whisper, eyes suddenly blurring.

“Good,” he says, undoing your buttons. “Let’s use the traffic light system today. It’s a simply way for me to check in on you and see how you’re doing.”

He lets the words sit in the air for a bit, fingers fiddling with your zipper. The only sound in the room is your own uneven breathing that you fight for control over.

The man pinches the tab of your zipper and shifts so his cheek is pressed against your forehead. “Color,” he asks, breath hot on the shell of your ear.

“Green,” you practically moan.

He slides off your pants with ease once he’s taken care of the zipper. He even helps you to keep your balance as you step out of them, one foot at a time.

“Color?” he asks again, as his fingers settle on the clasp of your bra.

“Green,” you reply, voice steadier now.

He undoes the hook with one hand.

You expect him to remove your panties next, but his fingers instead find the meat of your breasts. One of his arms wraps around you, securing you tightly against him, as you nearly keel over in a mixture of surprise and pleasure.

“Sensitive here,” he observes, cupping one of your breasts in his free hand. He uses a foot to nudge your legs further apart and slip a leg between them. The man isn't lying about getting off on this; his cock is hard as a rock against your ass.

“Fuck,” you whine as his bends you over ever so slightly. Just enough to rub your clothed pussy against his pant leg.

“Wet already,” he informs you, as if you don’t already know. As if you can’t feel the way the cotton material sticks to your lips. “All I did was undress you. That eager to begin?”

“Please,” you groan, desperate for him to take you apart with his slender fingers. “Please, Sir, I want you so fucking bad.”

“On the bed,” he instructs, releasing you, careful not to harm you as his leather harness peels away from your skin.

The rope he ends up choosing for the session is the jute rope. He takes his time winding the instrument around your wrists and pulling them above your head. His movements are practiced and skilled. His hands steady like a surgeon’s. You don’t even realize the effect watching him restrain you is having on you until a firm hand finds its way to your pelvis to stop your squirming.

Once you’ve settled, he retrieves two strands of additional rope.

“Are you familiar with the Spiral Futomomo tie?” he asks. “I understand that you’re still a beginner and tie will force you into a fixed position for an undetermined length of time. I trust you will use your safe word if needed?”

“You can trust me,” you assure him. “I know my limits.”

He must believe your words are sincere because he sets to work binding your ankle to your thigh, checking in periodically to ensure the wrappings aren’t too tight. The man is clearly in no rush and seems to delight in taking breaks between knots to steady your shaking form. You also notice the way his eyes shift to the growing wet spot beneath you as he progresses.

“What do you like about bondage?” he asks as he begins to work on your other leg.

“I don’t know,” you say, attempting to shrug before remembering your pose prevents you from such movement. “I’m never in control of my life anyway. May as well surrender myself to someone I know will take care of me.”

He doesn’t look at you, but you can see the way his eyes lighten. Your response must please him somehow. You decide to push the issue, “You like being in control?”

“I like caretaking,” is his response. “I like giving people what they need.”

“What if I need your fingers inside me?” you dare, feeling bold.

A small smile, but a smile all the same. “Then, you’ll have to patiently wait until I’m finished with the task at hand.”

He double checks all of his bindings once he’s finished securing you, mumbling under his breath about optimal blood flow. It’s cute, the way he seems so set on ensuring this is the best possible experience for you. You can’t remember the last dom you had who was this doting.

When he finally situates himself between your legs, it’s with gloved hands and a vibrator. You jump as the cool leather of the hand covering finds your inner thigh.

“Keep these spread for me,” he says, referring to your legs. Then he’s rubbing the vibrator, still off, up and down your panties with just enough strength for you to truly register the tool.

“You’re soaked,” he observes in that neutral tone of his, though his eyes glisten with awe. You wonder if he even realizes the vibrator isn’t on. His eyes find yours and for the first time all evening he smiles warmly at you. “Don’t worry. I’m going to take excellent care of you.”

Then he turns the vibrator on its lowest setting and your pussy truly begins to drool. He circles the vibrating toy around your clit strategically, watching your response to his ministrations intently. Fire pools in your belly as he slides the vibrator down your cunt and presses the tip of it gently against your opening. The panties you’re still wearing dull some of the vibration, but you can still feel the ungodly amount of slick that slips out of you at the slight penetration.

You do your best to stay still for him as he ups the setting, but your body starts to twitch in pleasure, back beginning to arch, toes threatening to curl. Your breath quickens as well as all the blood in your body seems to pump directly to your swelling clit. The same clit the man is now more firmly rubbing the vibrator against.

“Fuck,” you cry, starting to lose your composure. Your hips buck away from the relentless thrumming of the vibrator. Or maybe towards it. You’re not actually sure. It’s both too much and not enough at the same time. You need more. You need less. You need…

His unoccupied hand presses your hips back against the bed. “Easy,” he coaxes. “Don’t pull against the ropes.”

When you’re unable to obey, too overwhelmed with desire, he switches the vibrator off. The lack of sensation is so abrupt the tears you’ve been holding back finally spill, slipping down your heated cheeks. An animalistic whine you didn’t even know you were capable of escapes you.

“We’re not done,” he assures you, swiping at your tears with his thumbs. You wish suddenly he wasn’t wearing the leather gloves. You yearn to feel him skin to skin. The fabric is warm at least from the heat of his fingers. “You’re just getting a little fussy. I want to make sure everything is alright before we continue.”

He settles back between your spread legs and hooks his pointer finger in the bottom of your panties, pulling it aside to expose your dripping core and swollen lips. “Impressive,” he says, “how simple it was to elicit this response from you.”

He collects some of your spend on his index finger before starting to slide it inside you. It’s met with no resistance. He sinks easily in, straight to the knuckle. When he slips out it’s only to coat a second finger in your slick so he can sink that one in alongside the other. The two digits begin working you in tandem with each other, pumping deliciously against your walls. It doesn’t take him long to find what he’s looking for.

“Here,” he states, pressing and holding the tips of his fingers against the sensitive area. You involuntarily clench around them, body begging him to move them once more, but the man—to the devastation of your body—is nothing but the living embodiment of self-control.

You audibly cry out when he pulls his fingers from you. He locks eyes with you as he coyly promises, “Soon. I’d never leave a woman unsatisfied, and any man who would isn’t fit to be a dom.”

He picks the vibrator again and this time, when he touches it to your clit, it’s under your ruined panties. The thrumming sends a bolt of electricity skittering up your arched spine. Fuck, you’re so unbelievably wet. You feel your pussy fluttering around nothing and hiccup out a sob. You’re so empty. You’re so, so empty.

“Need,” you hiccup.

“What?” he asks patiently. “Tell me what you need.”

“Your fingers. I need your fingers. Please.”

He slips the same two from before back inside you.

“So well mannered," he praises. Then he asks, "Here?” as he presses the appendages against that spot once again.

“Yeah,” you agree, though you’re so far gone you would agree to anything he asked of you in this moment. “Yeah. Yeah. There. Right there. Fuck!”

He uses his fingers and the vibrator to bring you right to the brink of an orgasm. It’s so good. He’s so good. He’s touching you everywhere you need to be touched. Pushing all the buttons that need to be pushed. Your time in these rooms has never felt anything like this before, and you doubt it will ever feel anything like this ever again.

“Can I-”

“I don’t remember telling you that you needed my permission.”

Your orgasm ripples through you, strong and steady like a cresting wave. Once he’s certain he’s wrung the last of it out of you, the man withdraws his fingers and switches off the vibrator.

“I’m going to remove my gloves and start undoing your bindings,” he says.

“Yeah, okay,” you reply.

It takes a few minutes for him to completely untie you. Once he has, he asks permission to massage your legs and arms to reencouraged blood flow which you readily agree to. He produces a bottle of lotion that smells like eucalyptus from his bag and starts working the muscles of your arm.

“I wish they had showers here,” he offhandedly comments. “I don’t like sending people home without a proper washing.”

“A bath does sound nice,” you agree, sagging into his embrace.

“Promise me you’ll take one when you get home. I don’t want you getting into your bed dirty.”

“I would never make a promise I couldn’t keep, Sir.”

A comfortable silence falls over the room as he continues to provide you with aftercare.

“Zayne,” he eventually says, eyes fixed on the foot he’s been massaging for the past few minutes.

“What?”

“My name. You could use it if you’d like. Sir is fine too, if you’d truly prefer it, but I find names are much more intimate.”

“Oh,” is all you muster. Then you tell him yours.

“Could we move to the sofa while we continue to wind down?” he asks after testing the sound of your name in his mouth. “I like the casual skin to skin contact after a session. I’ll remove my harness but leave my slacks.”

“Fine with me.”

It takes Zayne a moment to remove his harness. Perhaps it’s his first time wearing this particular set of gear. You watch him wrestle with the final clasp through drooping eyelids. His expression softens when he catches you lazily staring at him.

“Admiring the view?” he teases.

“Never had a better one,” you reply easily.

He positions himself behind you when he joins you on the sofa. The two of you lay there comfortable for some time, breath seeming to synchronize in the quiet of the room. The world outside this secluded space slowly begins to creep back into your mind. Back to Metafluxes and Protocores. Back to Wanders and Hunters.

And then you start to cry.

If you weren’t so close to Zayne, you could probably hide it from him, but he notices the change in your mood instantly. He tugs gently at your arm, a wordless plea for you to turn to face him. You allow him to reposition you, curling yourself into his large body, tucking your face into his neck.

He pets at your hair soothingly while you let the worst of it out. When an appropriate amount of time has passed, he asks, “What brought that on?”

“It’s, uh, well it’ll probably ruin the moment if I told you.”

“I’d still like to know if it’s all the same to you. Debriefing is part of the scene after all.”

At first, you’re not sure you want to tell him what triggered the outburst, but considering the dynamic, you figure you owe it to him.

“I was thinking about my ex,” you admit.

Zayne stiffens, his caressing hand on your head stills. “They hurt you?”

“They loved me.”

 Zayne tangibly relaxes at your response, and he resumes petting your hair.

“What happened to them?” he asks, tone carefully neutral.

“They left me.”

The silence that follows your confession is welcome. You think you even dose off. When your eyes open again, Zayne is full dressed, sleeves of his shirt rolled up to his elbows as he sanitizes the sex toy you soiled.

Sensing you stir he says, “You’re awake.”

“I am.”

Zayne dries the toy and sets it aside, turning to face you.

“I like to follow up with the people I dom for. You don’t have to give me your number if you’re not comfortable. An email will suffice.”

“You can have my number,” you say, gesturing for him to hand you his phone. “I’d actually appreciate a check in tomorrow.”

“Of course.”

He walks you to the train station once he’s certain the number you’ve given him isn’t a fake.

“Remember to get a full eight hours of sleep tonight,” he tells you. “And please eat a protein-based meal for breakfast. Something with eggs and meat, maybe. A shake if absolutely necessary.”

“Yes, Doctor Zayne,” you joke, offering him a crisp salute as you step onto the train platform. Maybe you're imagining things, but you swear he flinches at your response.

A firm hand on your wrist stops you from fully entering the car. You turn to face him one final time.

“About that,” he says, expression unreadable. “I was serious about you seeing a specialist for your heart.”

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Wait wait i think i know why the earring in the new jade card is not on the good side, maybe he will do like vanessa in the little mermaid and take the place of Floyd or maybe i'm crazy!?

[Referencing this post and the April 2025 JP schedule!]

I don’t think Jade will be “taking” Floyd’s place if you mean he’ll pretend to be his twin? His eye shape is pretty distinguishable, and the way he dresses is a giveaway too. I don’t see what the point of them swapping would be, because assuming Floyd has to be present at the celebration, Jade would probably have to be there too?? But if Jade is pretending to be Floyd then obviously one brother is still missing.

I could see Jade going in Floyd’s place (like only Floyd was initially expected to show) or just attending the event by himself if only because Floyd got invited too but gets moody and refuses to join or got busy with something else.

I’ve heard the theory, but I find it makes even less sense than the “Jade is pretending to be Floyd” theory discussed above. Again, they have completely different eye shapes and styles of dressing. I also highly doubt that Floyd of all people would be able to consistently maintain the charade. And, most of all, I don’t understand why the marketing materials + announcement for the event would very clearly label the card as SSR Jade if it was actually SSR Floyd. Makes absolutely zero sense to me 🙂‍↕️

As I said in another post (linked at the beginning of this one), my current theory is something akin to what Floyd did in his Outdoor Wear card?? He brought along the eel mascot keychain to honor Jade, who wasn’t able to come along.

I’m guessing that Jade is wearing his earring on the other side for either a cultural/holiday-related reason or to represent Floyd, who wasn’t able to (or refused to) be present. At a wedding, formal attire is expected, so you have less liberty with accessories and probably can’t bring along a goofy item like Floyd did. The easiest way for Jade to “bring” Floyd’s spirit with him is to just swap the ear in which he wears his earring.

It’s hard to say if Floyd will be present in the event or not since we don’t have a plot synopsis 🤷‍♀️ If it’s something like a relative or Leech business partner’s wedding, both twins will probably be told to show. But again, we do not know what the context for the event is yet.

Personally, I do think it’s possible Floyd appears since the possibility was presented in A Firelit Sky. However, because he’s not a character with a new outfit, Floyd will likely be kept busy with something else while the rest of us do things as a group. This would be similar to how Kalim had to stay put and help with fireworks festival preparations while Jamil shows the others around Silk City. dnvsjwnwlw In Floyd’s case… it might be him being wrestled by a ton of stylists and squeezed into a suit and tie that he doesn’t want to be in 😅

[call-me-insane-but-wth]

I think people who get hung up on the genders or on headcanoning Ranma and Akane as transfem or transmasc have missed the point of ranma1/2 as a whole. Ranma 1/2 is about mixed martial arts, is about creativity, improvisation, and not being held to any set standard.

You see this even with just the myriad of suitors they get. None of their pursuits were valid. Not because any of them were the wrong* gender, but because they were just shitty people. Ranma and Akane gravitated towards one another, not because girl x boy, but because they found common ground and they respected and cared for one another deeply and sincerely as people, not prizes.

Ranma 1/2, in its own zany way, challenges the gender norms and toxic masculinity. If ppl's takeaway is that "-So Ranma was always a girl and Akane was always a boy!1!" Then that is in of itself sexist and *limiting* two protagonists in a work that means anything BUT to limit oneself.

Also, Akane as a transmasc/transmale? That wouldn't make sense even if people are still going off of the horrible characterization of the first adaptation. Akane is a character who is consistently coded as feminine. Akane is someone who, like any other teenage girl with a boy she likes, is insecure about her own looks. But Akane is also someone who likes martial arts, has a strong sense of justice, and is someone that her community considers reliable and dependable.

Ranma Saotome himself is a commentary and satire of the "hard boiled" *Uber patriarchal and sexist martial artist tropes*. Rumiko is an author who uses a lot of Buddhist themes and subtext, and because she also uses Chinese influences, i'll include daoist principles as well. Ranma (as he was *raised* by genma) was severely unbalanced and limited. Falling into the niangnichuan was the best thing possible to give him a sense of perspective and broaden his horizons, not only as a martial artist but as a person. Being able to reconcile his feminine qualities with his masculine doesn’t mean that he HAS to identify as a girl.

Or that he was always a hidden girl. Or that Akane was always a hidden boy because she enjoyed athletics.

They're just two teenagers flailing about but falling in love under the messed up stuff society is telling them to be.

Does their gender have to be discounted just because of our unaddressed gendered biases and prejudices?

I really enjoy seeing other ppls interpretations, but sometimes there's a... self harming, sexist, leaning into self-loathing (almost) backhanded way they go about some, when Ranma1/2, despite its dated tropes and zingers, at the heart of it, is all about celebrating ppl's differences and calling for ppl of all genders and backgrounds to not limit themselves. Much less the (gendered) negativity that the fandom directs towards either Ranma or Akane.

[derww]

have you ever read a fanfic where authors self-insert travels into some story and fixes the life of a sad and pathetic wet cat character? | some thoughts about several new members being lifesteal watchers before joining.

one thing ive been thinking alot lately. before s5 we didn't really have a moment of "oh, this new member has been watching lifesteal before joining". and even in s5, its almost like this is not that important because here we have, to a much greater extent, people whose metagame-luggage is in the fact that they knew lifestealers. as 4c having his friendship and silly feuds with mid, and jumper being really close vi's friend, and pentar being jumper's friend, and squiddo knowing ash for ages, and wemmbu being friends with zam&minute for like an eternity. even jepexx with all his ive literally founded this server, hes an irl friends with mapicc and poafa, I literally remember one time when he came in the middle of the lore and mapicc had to bribe poafa to distract him. and it is a really cool and interesting theme as its own, a great foundation for the different headcanons and aus and using it as a part of the dynamics, but nothing of what we've been searching, yeah?

wrong. minutetech. minutetech who was clowns fan and literally created a team clown would want to be – his actual character's basis has watching lifesteal in it, and his weird attitude towards clown drags on throughout the season, ending with his death. but hey, it's been more than that, not just watching videos, he was watching streams, he was a visitor in the zams chat. and watching streams, even in fragments, is a completely different level in regard to just watching videos. and it is obvious by how he speaks about zam and how he is inspired by past him, and how he remembers some specific parts. minutetech is the fanboy on the server, im sorry, and i love him for it. he wasnt a frequent visitor, but he was able to open the curtain and be impressed, and that's cool.

moving away from the relatively linear rookie roster of the season 5, the season 6 one if a fucking rolecoaster. okay, okay, lets start with something easier. hannah defo didnt get the memo, zero idea about sb but i think he watched atleast clown, e doesnt seem to really care, his thing is the reverse, his connection to bliss and how they showed themselves as both touching and deadly family, threatening pentar with knives in case he did not protect their boy, and chief does it s5-style, being friends with minute. its really hard to consider flame, he defo watched atleast part of the things, and he is friends with pentajumper, and he refers to the past seasons but misses out a lot and doesnt seem to have a consistent understanding of a context. 

okay. manepear. his case is kinda close with minute's in a part that he actually was a big lifesteal and esp clown's fan. never saw that one fanart he drew for zam but really would like to. lifesteal was an important thing for him much before he actually joined, and i can see him having good ground knowledge of video-part of the server, albeit easily missing something really important. hes also friends with pentajumper and had his clown rivalry story on bizzare just before lifesteal, giving him an interesting starting point and explaining why he did betray his idol of the past so easily. making him vodwatch s4 eclipse would make him better in lifestealing i promise. he just needs to find a balance.

to the main course. lets speak about kab first. this is a part where shit gets actually interesting since. you know...

("Powerless", 03/29/23)

oh, hi, Derapchu.

(literally the betrayal stream 03/28/23)

wait, lets make a pause. look, its Fl4pp0!

(also the betrayal stream)

the one who made new lifesteal stickers! wow! absolutely nothing interesting about them aside from thi-

okay. let's digress from the topic for a bit – it will make sense later, I promise. you know showtime smp? its fine if you dont.

the important part you should know is that showtime aknowledges stream viewers as an important part of a plot. they are called the audience, and how interested they are in a particular character is directly responsible for their well-being. most of the characters know that they are being watched, and some even hear the voices of the audience, and sometimes they are even asked questions, the answers to which can have a real impact on what is happening. and here is mika flappo. yes, this flappo, from the chat. (fun fact, there was also atleast two other showtime members lol)

firstly he is just a really cool fanarter in the showtime fandom, and she enjoys the streams and the plot as we all do, and then it... then they are just HERE.

just imagine. you live your very fucking hard and terrible life, having to deal with all sorts of shit and somehow not lose your head, and you hide so, so fucking much from everyone, because they can't know, because it's so scary and dangerous. and then you meet someone for the first time, and the first fucking thing they say to you is "oh, its YOU". and they do know what you did.

they were a part of the audience because mika has been literally watching the streams all this time. and yeah, she doesnt know everything, only the parts gods chose to show to the viewers, and they actually watched live, but its still sooo fucking much. and now an absolute stranger is walking around the server, and they know your worst secrets and impute you for your sins. luckily, mika can't spoil things, so its not like he can actually tell anyone, but her existence by itself is still pretty fucking terrifying.

luckily, both kab and derap are not just some strangers, but also they don't have to keep their mouths shut. they know what only the audience knows, and for them it becomes an important part of their understanding of the world and zam, something that they can use to their advantage. and they do.

kab heavily relies on a feeling of understanding and knowing better, and sometimes for me it feels like shes trying to do it even speaking about zam's feelings. at some point shes been heavily relying on pitying him as a way to show that she understands, and she's sorry, and she knows what exactly zam has to change to be better. its like... being the chatter who always backseats, but now you are actually here. absolutely no neg to kab, obviously.

its actually interesting how kab simultaneously sees and knows (or thinks she knows) so many zams weak spots and problems and traumas and calls him broken and harming himself and almost as if unable to make the right decisions for himself, and at the same time she puts him on a pedestal, perceiving him as a hero, as someone who should adhere to the correct perception and reflect her idea of a good person and teammate. and... it makes sense as a way of wanting to help your favorite anime character to become better without actually understanding either them or their beliefs and wishes and just trying to recreate the picture from my head of how things have to be, depriving a character of personality and autonomy in the process. even her expecting him to help her with the karmas law – she thinks that this idea is objectively right, so obviously white knight (lol) princezam has to get it.

people really liked her asking if she reminds him of someone he once was. i really do not. because sure, shes right at the ground lvl, but she doesnt get it. shes not s5, shes s4. she is vi and zam at the same time, and it makes my head hurt. "not everything is about you, zam", but she does make everything about him, really. i wonder if he was her favorite character.

i like that sometimes she acknowledges that she doesnt actually know better than anyone else. that she is just scared because her methods doesnt work anymore. but she speaks the opposite so often that sometimes i just dont know what she really thinks. with her strange division into lore and non-lore, with how much kab lies to people and lies to herself, she remains frustrating. sometimes I have a feeling that she plays a completely different character than the one she ends up being, and hey, that's part of the server.

some of it can be said about derapchu, and its easy to say that hes better than kab, but i dont really think so. hes less pushy about it, surely, but he also thinks he knows how itd be better for zam and intends to make him change in a way he deems correct. sure, he doesnt idolize or pity him, but he still wants to fix zam.

its not that easy as just dividing things on yours and servers because zam has a connection to it, and the server's well-being is directly connected to his. with enough mental gymnastics, even the desire to repair the spawn can be called at least partially selfish since zam does it for himself too, since he loves things being pretty and cool. speaking of the server as a whole, it is difficult to draw a line between where he does something for himself and where he does something only for others with just how conditional the common good is and how important the server itself is to him, just alive, just working, just being played. he wanted to make everyone give a shit and never fully left this modus.

and in a sense, derapchu fails. as gapples being for the fights against mane, or considering that zam perceives the hearts in a similar way as he does (and he really isnt, our guy was giving out the hearts left and right, really, and he knows derap enough to be sure he wouldnt do anything malicious), or seemingly never noticing that zam, despite being mostly truthful during the whole dialogue, never actually opened up to him. maybe his common experience and zam trusting him makes him feel like it is enough, but its barely a half. he said sorry for being too pushy today tho. and helped zam just because. it was good. sadly its not enough to understand that he cant just choose whats better for the other person.

you know, i really like to think about having all this background of being a lifesteal watcher from the point of the full-blown lore, without pulling out the card that the characters are also streamers or youtubers. this is a part that requires an individual approach: for example, i have drafts where boomie and kab, as centrals, contact their lifesteal friends directly through hacked communicators. or, for example, clown is known because the coolness of his conquests spread into legends, caught everyone's eye, and became worldwide news. in general, you can just come up with a connection between the worlds, like fidonet, or even a more modern Internet, and this will make everything much better. or you can follow the showtime trail and give each character an audience – similar to just making them streamers, but that's the twist that makes just enough of a difference. and, in the end, people can just be friends, meet in their free time, and tell stories. both derapchu and kab were zams friends long before joining the server, and this is something that should not be forgotten either. they, unlike the rest of us, have a real context. and, like, wow.

overall: these aussies gotta understand that zam is not their pet project and that he doesnt need to be fixed. some help here and there wouldnt be bad, sure, but they cant just choose whats right for him and whats not. he is, in this context, his own person and not just a book character and he needs a friend, but not saviour nor doctor nor manipulator nor mechanic. just a friend.

[exaflux]

BTAS pre-production stuff/official designs and artstyle stuff

Don't mind the title, I'm a bit naff at titling things...

I'm sure people have made posts about it before, but just in case there's anyone that doesn't know, there's official documents on BTAS floating around the net. Things covering episode writing, bios, a bunch of art that animators would have used. Whole lot of stuff.

I've seen people ask questions/have discussion on things like imitating the style/character heights/other general things. These documents are all official and might be helpful so, hey, might as well share for those not in the know.

Gonna keep it short (I'll provide some links so you can check out for yourself as there's a lot I won't cover) but I'll outline some stuff that catches my eye (first bit is about pre-production and ideas they had, second bit is stuff about how they went about drawing/designing the characters)

Pre-production

In animation, it's standard to have a thing called a writer's bible, also called an animation bible. They include everything from plot synopsis, character/concept art, character bios, episode ideas, basically the whole nine yards. These are used mainly in the early stages to pitch ideas and get projects greenlit, but are also kept around as a handy shortform thing to summarise the whole project as much as possible.

As it turns out, the BTAS writer's bible has been extensively documented! There's a PDF of it actually! And if you don't want a PDF, there's a website that covers all the contents too.

As per writer's bibles, it has a ton of their ideas and direction they wanted to take with the show, from episode structure to joke writing right down to how much settings should be able to change per-episode. There's a whole lot of art too! Here's a snippet about some of the changes they wanted to make with the Dark Knight himself:

And just for fun let's also leave some info about how they approached writing Bruce Wayne:

Anyway! On a more interesting topic- some of the rogues. The bios of most of the rogues are included, as are some art of earlier designs. Riddler looks like a sleezy car salesman and Joker is kinda just missing his lips and has stripy pants is seems.

Also of note: in some alternative timeline somewhere we could have had Calendar Man and Gentleman Ghost in BTAS...

As for character heights... The height chart is sectioned into "head" height for Batman's head. The uppermost line is Batman's height, so Batman is 8 Batman heads tall. While it can be hard to make out some of the character heights due to the poses, it'd be safe to guess that you do take poses into account on the height chart. Two-Face is shorter on the chart than Harvey is for example but you'll notice that Two-Face's art shows his head tilted down slightly, so Two-Face isn't actually shorter it's just his pose.

You'll notice these characters are uncoloured. The colour palettes featured are an interesting point that deserve their own post. I'll touch on them another time.

Style Guides / Character Sheets

Style guides tell animators how to correctly draw characters. Can also be applied for things like backgrounds and props and the likes though, whatever feels needed to be noted to keep consistency even if other people are drawing the characters.

Character sheets are character sheets. 'Nuff said. These just show off a character looks from different angles. Expression sheets showing how character emote, art on full-body posing and sheets on hand poses are things that also tend to be covered in animated productions.

Can be found here and here. A lot of overlap in the art shown between the two links but they're absolutely full of character sheets and turn-arounds. There's definitely a lot more design documents I've seen about in other places, but alas, I can't track them down for the life of me.

Here's some highlights:

(When Twoface blinks only his good eye closes completely. His injured eye only partially closes)

("John Crane")

Some early character art:

~~~

If you made it this far then congrats here's some Batmen for your troubles

[harlothane]

Theon and Fear - And at the end of fear...

George R R Martin’s ASOIAF focuses on the "human heart at war with itself". In doing so, it provides a compelling, complex and deeply touching exploration of human emotions. One of the dominant emotions the characters are faced with is fear.

I especially love how fear is shown in Theon's storyline. His backstory and the events unfolding in his six Clash of Kings chapters and seven Dance with Dragons chapters, taken alone, constitute a raw, emotional and unsettling account on the many faces of fear. What it does to people. How it changes them, motivates them, corrupts them and may regenerates them.

“Can a man still be brave if he’s afraid?”

“That is the only time a man can be brave.”

There is no need for a long look at Theon’s storyline to see in which ways Eddard Stark’s infamous moral lesson applies to his struggles. Here is a character that commits crimes in the beginning of his storyline, goes through hell because of his misguided choices (led by his fear), finds his courage as he faces true terror and accomplishes one of the most selfless and brave acts in the series to save a girl.

I do feel like I’m missing pieces of the puzzle writing that, aren’t I?

The misstep, I think, is to draw too hastily a parallel between Theon and the other Winterfell boys around his age – Robb and Jon (it's a common issue in fandom and actually had a negative impact on the reading of Theon's storyline, I think. Read : x).

Unlike them, at the beginning of the story, Theon already knows fear. Both Jon and Robb had a decent, secure childhood. While Jon surely has grounds to feel dissatisfied with what life has to offer a bastard like him, he did not grow up in fear. At the age of nine, he probably had faced rejection, loneliness and disdain. But not true, traumatizing fear like nine-year old Theon had to.

19 year-old Theon in Winterfell has already been scarred by fear. He is not a knight of summer in that regard, as his entire personality is a product of fear, to the point where it becomes hard to pinpoint what his true self consists of exactly (that becomes evident as we are invited to his internal monologue in Clash, which is full of inconsistencies, rewrites and contradictions related to the way he sees himself).

We know for certain that, as the story begins, Theon is already familiar with the fear of rejection and humiliation (inflicted by his brothers and felt as an outsider in the North), the fear of losing his loved ones and his home (inflicted by war and the soldiers fighting that war) and some repressed kind of fear related to Euron and possibly his magic. He’s been abused and is still suffering from the lingering fear of death, cultural isolation/exclusion and loneliness.

What fascinates me with this storyline especially is that there is never an easy answer. It is a feature of ASOIAF as a whole, to be frank. I suppose that as a horror genre lover, I am especially drawn to the way Theon's story deals with fear. How it corrupts, how it paralyzes, how it regenerates.

Fear as corruption.

Theon, a “shy” child, “in awe” of his brothers, has crafted a personality to guard himself against the threats most frightful to him (humiliation, being unloved and unwanted, abandonment).

A personality that existed to guard himself against the world and more precisely, the men in power who could use him. A personality tailored to please his captors and his father, the ones his life depended on. His clothes, in this regard, are another part of the armor. Their purpose is to please, seduce or appease the ones whose approval Theon needs at the moment (though I truly do believe he likes his velvelt and silks, he still immediately suggests his father that he would change it if it would please him).

Living with those fears of being unloved and unwanted changed him profoundly as harrowing experiences always do. Fear is the one constant in his early life. His personality developed around it.

Theon mimics Dagmer Cleftjaw’s smiles because the warrior was one of the bravest men he knew in his early days and a hostage far from home needs to channel that tough, invulnerable spirit.

Theon was a child who lived in awe of his violent brothers, so as a young man he acts accordingly, as if spilling blood makes you worthy, as if life were a game to win no matter the cost for the weak and innocent (no matter the price children and mothers pay, no matter the price he himself paid for his father’s ambition!).

I know the Theon we meet in Clash isn’t the most agreeable person ever. It’s the point.

In truth, he is a hardly a person. As in, a human entity with consistent memories to ground him (even before Dance, he represses memories, seems to have forgotten a great deal about the Iron Islands and I believe we may learn more about this in Winds), and autonomous desires and hopes (in spite of himself, he is constantly trying to fit the expectations of the men he fears/wants to emulate – Eddard and Balon).

Even the way he expresses his sexual/sensual desires feels at times as a performance meant to impress or prove a point… read : x or x).

He doesn’t even have a future, and he knows that deep down. As Robb is crowned though and devise a plan with him to ally himself with the Islands, Theon’s hopes rose up and that is how suddenly there was in the sky a comet that heralded his bright future.

He seems like a “closed book” to the world around him, but he was more of a blank page, really.

A mess of fears stitched together with a smile. Fear really is the constant.

What would you do, if you were constantly afraid? Cut from the rare people and places that gave you a sense of security?

What would you do, if – that’s the greatest irony – you were surrounded by people who thought of you as a thing to be feared, an animal to be tamed.

Interestingly, Theon is known to be brave in battle, perhaps even reckless. Robb states it plainly: “Theon has fought bravely for us.” Dagmer Cleftjaw knows Theon “is no craven”. In Winterfell, he is ready to die with the few men who stayed with him.

Being shaped by fear did not make him a coward. It made him desperate and unreasonable. For one, Theon knows fear intimately and there is no greater terror than the unknown, after all. He knows war. He knows death. He is still haunted by the battle of Pyke.

Still, he is eager to march with Robb’s army. Still, he wishes he could have faced Jaime Lannister on the battlefield. And still, he would have died for Robb, he would have died for his father.

He shouldn’t be so eager to march with an army led by the people who hurt his own family so deeply. War traumatized him already. It separated him from his family. It obliterated his future, destroyed his prospects. But his fear of humiliation, rejection, loneliness – it overtakes all. Then again, I understand that Theon in Clash can be difficult to empathize with to some, but if you read his reaction with the knowledge that this is a person who is constantly in a state of true, agonizing fear, I think it changes your perspective a little.

The horrible outcome of all this is that by trying so desperately not to be seen as a weak thing people can use for their political gain, Theon becomes it. For Ramsay and Roose. That is not karma. That is the definition of a tragedy.

It has been said before: Ramsay is a secondary-(tertiary) character, he exists to embody Theon’s worst sins and fears. That is his nightmare, breathing and living and flaying every piece of a carefully crafted personality Theon made in the North to stop being afraid, to reclaim power and control over his fate.

Fear didn’t allow him to be brave. It made him desperate, easy to manipulate. He takes Winterfell in a foolish attempt to be the person he thinks he must become. The self-made Prince. The heir who returned in glory. A worthy son of Balon Greyjoy.

That is the story he tells himself and others. In truth, it becomes apparent he took Winterfell in a desperate attempt to make his “almost-home” his at last.

In a desperate attempt to belong somewhere he could have everything – power and recognition and love. It is the type of extreme decision you make when you let fear overtake your reason. Any other choice would have been more reasonable. It wouldn’t have saved him from fear, though.

Most of Theon’s bad choices are a result of fear. It made him crave power with the same intensity as he secretly wanted love and recognition. In Clash, Winterfell itself, the castle, its people, embody his fear of rejection, of being unloved and unwanted. He represses it. Until he can't escape it even in his dreams.

The two desires, to have agency/power and love, clash violently in Winterfell, an arc in which Theon’s starts to completely unravel as he does everything in his power to be a hard man like his father, like Eddard (no matter how contradictory), while spying the tiniest hint of affection or gratefulness in his captives’ eyes.

After all, in his own experience, it is possible for a captive to admire and crave his captor’s love.

To want to help them. To be part of their family. And he seemed to expect the same from the people of Winterfell. Even in Dance (because torture doesn’t erase your past trauma!), he still believes he could have reasonably expected them to help him

His constant fear has twisted his view on loyalty (you cannot be loyal to someone who imprisons you), love and desire (he links lust and violence), power and justice (“hard men rule the world”).

It corrupts his desires, even. Of all the sexual encounters, or thoughts, he has, none seems genuine with the exception of Esgred, who is not a real person but the embodiment of the nonchalant, confidant attitude he wishes he could adopt as easily. She is everything he cannot be. She belongs. She commands respect. She has a family. And as she divulges her real identity to him, Asha becomes someone to fear. She is in his place. She is him, the heir, the son, while he is nothing and nobody.

Fear as a paralyzer

It is not surprising that Theon would smother from early on the parts of his personality that made him sensitive to fear.

His need to belong brings only fear (he will never be part of the Stark family, but he still dreams of it until he buries that dream as well).

His empathy brings only fear (he demonstrates in Dance his ability to connect with broken people used by the ones in power he could have shared experiences with but couldn’t because of his fear of humiliation).

It shows one limit to Eddard’s reasoning. Fear, sometimes, changes you in such a way that it hinders your ability to be brave (as in, to make the most moral choice against your own immediate interest).

Growing up with constant fear drove Theon to stifle his empathy, making it hard for him to protect other people, as you would expect from a prisoner whose life is a bargaining chip that hinges on his father’s and his captor’s will, from a man who cannot even help himself.

Growing up in constant fear jeopardized Theon’s ability to make long-term, realistic plans for his future, as he barely has any stable support to hold onto. His entire existence does not belong to him. NB: In this regard, it is logical that most characters he is paralleled with throughout his story (Jeyne P, Barbrey, the dead lady Hornwood, Holly who has the same cocky smile and arrogance as his old self, Alannys with her white hair and even Dany…) are women, who are more likely to be stripped of agency, must fight to claim autonomy and struggle to regain a semblance of control over their destiny.

He has many faults, though it cannot be said in my opinion that he did have a good choice to make and that he simply chose wrong by trying to please his father. There were only bad roads that led to imprisonment, death or ruin for him. Theon realizes this in Dance: he cannot bring himself to imagine a bright future. No, he regrets not to have died with Robb. He knows his path was filled with fear either way.

Fear is a paralyzer. It does, in a sense, alter Theon’s capacity to grow and evolve.

Fear makes him an apt survivor (he’d survive a horror movie in messy “final girl” fashion), with a great potential for adaptation. But it corrupted him in the process. Led him to embrace a (faux) cynical attitude, to be over-zealous with his own captors to the point of risking his life for them and most of all, to opt for cruelty over mercy contrary to his own (sometimes contradictory) values – in Winterfell, he hurt others, and it haunts him, but he stands by his choices.

His fear of being mocked, used and humiliated drowns every other motivator.

He is so afraid to be seen as he thinks the men of the world want to paint him: a weak creature to be used. Someone who needs to bargain and submit to keep his life. It is rather in line with his way of thinking that he would consider himself a whore after Ramsay subjected him to his power and abuse in Dance.

“Only a fool humbles himself when the world is so full of men eager to do that job for him.”

That’s it, that’s the philosophy. Theon has his moments of incredible self-awareness, and this is one, hidden beneath some moral lesson as a pretext.

It shows that:

He has a bleak, but rather realistic view relating to most men in power. They will abuse it. They will humiliate the weakest. They will do so eagerly.

He hasn’t met Ramsay at that point. He may instead be thinking of his brothers, of the lords who humiliated his defeated father, of his own father maybe, or perhaps (in my opinion) Euron.

His arrogance is a deliberate strategy designed to avoid the fate reserved to the most fragile people.

He doesn’t judge the men who abuse their power but doesn’t seem to view them in a positive light. Still, consciously or not, Theon sometimes acts like those men. Since he is mostly deprived of real political or military power, he does it in the context of his sexual relationships (that deserves an analysis, especially regarding how sexuality in his chapters is so often if not always depicted in a negative, degrading manner.). It’s a “eat or be eaten” kind of mentality he is struggling with during his Clash arc.

Fear instructs him to repress the slightest sign of weakness. There cannot be true loyalty, love or desire in such a state. You survive. You are barely living. You just survive.

The rare sincere relationships he forms are short-lived – Patrek Mallister is the son of an enemy family; Robb Stark cannot ever be his equal; his bond with Asha is poisoned by envy and fear, again, of his place being stolen by her.

Theon’s mind favors denial/dissociation and repression as a defense mechanism. It doesn't exactly help him to form sincere relationships with people. It’s a motif throughout his storyline that echoes the stakes relating to Ironborn culture in the story (they must remember their history or they’re condemned to repeat it – that’s the symbolic role of Rodrik the Reader in Asha’s storyline).

Most times, he tends to rewrite reality - consciously or not. Of course, he will be welcomed by Balon Greyjoy! Of course, his traditionalist father will agree to submit to Robb Stark! Of course, he, the hostage, will be given Asha's place that she (of course!) stole from him! Of course, he is destined to be one of those hard men who rule the world, not an eternal victim! Of course, he is not afraid, and even if he is, even brave men feel agonizing fear about other men seeing their weaknesses!

We soon discover how fragile this mechanism really is. The façade cracks more often than Theon would like. There are many instances of this, especially in his conversation with Dagmer ("I know you are no craven" "Does my father?") and Rodrik Cassel ("The noose I wore was not made of hempen rope but it chafed, it chafed me raw"). Worst of all, he allows Reek/Ramsay to amplify his fear. When I write "allow", I do not mean he did it on purpose naturally. But he is the one who freed Reek/Ramsay. He opened the door to a living nightmare. Reek/Ramsay quite literally haunts him in his Clash chapters.

What he cannot rewrite, Theon represses. It does not seem like it at first glance because he is prone to reckless decisions. It can lead one to categorize him as a vain egomaniac, not as a repressed person. His promiscuity doesn’t help, since we are wired to associate repression and modesty.

It is true terror that he is obligated to repress - and it is what comes flowing unbridled as he loses his armor in Dance. This kind of dread is mostly associated with Ramsay (there are so many instances I won't even go into it) and, well, Euron (the slight unease Theon felt about his uncle during ACOK can - and must - certainly be revisited with our current knowledge about him, the fact that in ASOS it is established that Theon revealed awful details about his uncle to Robb, and the now evident parallels between Aeron and Theon).

Fear as a regenerative force

In Dance, the "dread" Theon feels in the crypt of Winterfell is "familiar". And I think you can see it as his fear of being unwanted. Of belonging nowhere.

It makes sense: Theon fears what he truly is. A prisoner, a scared child and a pawn for men to use in their plans. It is the truth he can never escape, no matter how perfectly he plays the Hard Powerful Masculine Man.

Fear pursues him all his life. It is only when he has no fear left to feel (it was all spent in a cell of the Dreadfort; all his fear is caught by Ramsay, who is the embodiment of Theon’s insecurities) that he shows his more empathetic and gentle nature – although he still feels anger, bitterness and the occasional dread, of course.

Still, it is not a bed of roses. Theon is certainly more sincere. He is not putting on a performance for himself. When he lies, he is terribly conscious of it. He doesn’t manage to repress his traumatic memories anymore. It all comes back, flooding. Even such buried memories as the ones related to Euron.

In a way, Winterfell acts in his story as the theatre scene, the place where you can finally be yourself. I wrote a bit about this here. It serves as a catharsis for Theon. In Winterfell, he is able to find pieces of himself. Pieces he had forgotten. He starts to remember the childhood he had buried ("A son of the Islands" / the Euron related reaction in Winds).

Fear had been eating away at him. Fear had been controlling him, at times. Not that he wasn't responsible, but he certainly let himself be overcome by his crippling fear of humiliation (which, sidenote, I don't believe stems only from his status as a hostage but that is another story).

Fear had been breaking him piece by piece since childhood. Just like the rat he eats at the start of Dance - it had been eating him first! He had to defend himself against the threats even if it meant hurting and killing in the process.

It is in Winterfell that he finally confront his fears - that he meets the one essential fear he had been trying to escape: himself.

The lies become a motif, even. “False is all you were.” Theon never lied as a manipulator would, though. Most times, he does not seem to understand the coherence (or lack thereof) of his own actions – which is also a side effect of fear (or to be precise, the fear caused by childhood mistreatment). It causes confusion, alters your awareness and hinders such abilities as analysis and planning.

However flawed Theon was, he was a prince, he was a warrior and a friend, he was handsome, he took care of his clothes and weapons, he saw a comet and decided it shone for him. He wasn’t much of a real, sincere, coherent person, but it was the most functional version of himself he managed to be in his situation.

The man he pretended to be could never have survived the Dreadfort, though. He had to disappear. Was he even real? The façade barely made it through his Prince of Winterfell era. Chances are, had he escaped Ramsay, Theon would still have been forced to confront his true self one way or another.

He is stripped from all his usual defense mechanisms in a horrific torture labyrinth. He becomes the weak thing he always feared he’d be seen as. He cannot hide. He cannot lie. He cannot even smile.

Every single fear he ever had becomes his new reality.

Humiliation: check.

Being controlled and used as a thing: check.

Mockery and disregard: check.

Friendless and abandoned: check.

To escape from fear, he can only repeat the partition he learnt as a child hostage: apply the rules of the people who can cut off your head at any time, and be the well-behaved prisoner so you can rise again later and impress every the ones in power who can share their power with you (a very Ironborn strategy, actually).

Except, there is no escape this time. The flaying knife has cut through the armor Theon had crafted for himself. He has no way out (another motif throughout his storyline). He has no secrets left and no smile to hide behind. He cannot forget his status as Ramsay’s pet by exerting power onto others. He is the very last creature on the food chain this time.

And so, there is nothing to fear anymore.

The Dance chapters are filled with terror and dread, until Theon pieces himself together. Then he regains some composure, purpose and faith, even. He finds his courage within himself, where it always existed, in truth. And, in Jeyne, he finds a motivation. Saving her, a child prisoner, abused and terrorized, he also saves what little of himself he can.

The only time he can truly be brave is when he doesn’t have to fear becoming fully himself at last. Whatever that means, in the end. At the end of fear, something must remain. Something must be rebuilt. Piece by piece.

[remus-poopin]

It seems like you somehow manage to have one foot in the marauders fandom and one in the snape fandom and I’m so impressed. How do you do it?

Also, since you get to see both sides of things I’m wondering what you like the most about each fandom?

Ok this is an interesting question! Honestly I think I’m able to do this, and do this enjoyably, because I really try to make an effort to not moralize. This hasn’t always been how I interacted with fiction in the past, so it’s been a tricky process of learning how to do this with consistency. But it is something that I think is very important for me to do, not only because I have a better time in fandom when I'm not moralizing, but also because it inspires a sort of self reflection and allows me to practice empathy in a way that’s feels more analytical than emotional/inherent. And in the case of navigating two fandoms that have a built in tension between them, this becomes especially helpful.

The tension between the snape and marauders fandom almost always comes down to moralizing. The back and forth arguments between fans are usually rooted in the idea that the other character is not only morally flawed, but more morally flawed than theirs. If you look at any anti Snape or anti James post there’s an underlying agenda that’s trying to prove one is worse than the other. This is pretty irritating to me because I find it to be very boring, silly, and just missing the point of the characters and themes. But this is also irritating because I find that it's ineffective in producing any real meaningful analysis on these characters. Because the goal is not to understand that character, but to condemn them.

(This doesn’t mean that I think you shouldn’t examine the behavior of the characters, just that assigning a moral judgment to that behavior outside the world of that character leads to heavily biased analysis (meaning making it personal and about your standard of morality leads to a messy understanding of the character and story))

Going back to the tension between these fandoms, I think when you’re busy trying to prove how shitty a fictional character is you have a hard time separating them from their fans. Because it’s not really about the character anymore it’s about you and your personal feelings and beliefs.

I very frequently run into posts talking about “snape defenders” and “marauders defenders”, like this is some kind of battle where a side needs to be picked, and then picking a side is a reflection of your morality and politics (I’ve seen marauders fans imply that “snape defenders” are fascists or fascist sympathizers and I’ve seen snape fans call marauders fans “class traitors”, all in the last couple days mind you).

I’m going to be honest and say that whenever this pops up it’s gets pretty frustrating, frustrating because it feels like people are just using these characters as avatars for larger discussions they actually want to be having, but because these characters have specific stories, motivations, and complexities it makes this extremely messy (want to vent about the cult of conservatism that's growing all around us? Bring out the Snape Ken doll and talk about how he deserved his bullying (if he even was bullied)! Hate feeling the weight of capitalism on your chest while the class divide grows larger and larger? Call James “bourgeois scum”!)

(Or as @sideprince wisely said, it’s a way to be political without actually engaging in politics)

So yes I find this tiring, but I also really get it. I have done some form of this myself plenty of times. I am not immune to moralizing or having these same type of strong emotional reactions to a fictional character. In fact, I had this very recently when I watched “Girls” for the first time last month. Until maybe this week I felt a strong hatred for the character “Adam”. This hatred came from seeing him do something in a scene that I considered to be morally repugnant. The scene itself was incredibly graphic and triggering to the point where I had to stop watching the show for a couple days. The disgust response firing in my brain made it so I was incapable of viewing his character as anything but a POS, and all the complexities of him were lost because I refused to engage with them. So all his actions after that were viewed with a moral judgement from me. I mean even when he was being funny, sweet, or just interesting I felt incredibly annoyed because I desperately didn’t want to like him. However I was cognizant of the fact that I was having this sort of moral reaction to fiction because this is a show that is defined by its complex, complicated, and realistic characters, who have all done some very questionable things, and yet he was the only character getting this treatment in my head. So feeling frustrated with my own hypocrisy I decided that I needed to start approaching this differently.

So I made a choice to look at his action, the one that I found disgusting, and start breaking it down: Why did he do that? What was it saying about his relation to shame, power, control, violence, sex, gender, etc.? How else has he reacted to those issues in the show? I kept asking those types of questions, on and on, until suddenly I wasn’t just thinking about the disgusting act itself, but the character. The act stopped being about my own feelings and trauma and became about him.

That’s what I do with the marauders and snape, that’s what I strive to do with any fictional character, because to me that’s the most enjoyable way to engage with fiction. And I find that the fun I have in fandom is greatly limited when I’m pissed at a character, because it makes it difficult to interact with others who are their fans. If I see that someone is playing with that character, a little voice would go, “but what about my anger?” followed by a sharp sting. That type of anger, that moral anger, is personal, but this character is public, it lives beyond me and my feelings. My anger is mine, it never belonged to the public.

And I have at some point felt that same type of moral disgust/anger for both the marauders and snape. But I zeroed in on what specific action was making me feel that way, tried to understand why I had that reaction in the first place, and then went back to the action itself and tried to contextualize it within the character and story so it was removed from myself.

That’s how I’ve been helping myself with the moralizing issue. I’ll still have these reactions in the future, I might even have one on here, but I'll keep working on it. Because either way I love all of these characters and I want to continue to be able to exist in both fandoms without having to choose a side, or even lean a certain way. When you're not trying to win the war on which character was the Shittiest™ the pressure turns off and you can just enjoy these multifaceted characters with their many flaws and many strengths.

And as for what I like most about each fandom: I adore the snapedom because I've always felt that the best meta in the entire hp fandom came from there. Honestly the whole reason I love snape so much wasn't because I ever felt particularly identified with him, but because I read a billion incredible metas and analyses about him and truly came to appreciate his complexities.

For the marauders side I think I really enjoy the camaraderie, there are a lot of really sweet and cool people I’ve talked to on here and that's always been a blast!

[jinxfixeseverything]

14/26 Fight (Chapter 14)

Notes and disclaimers: Story is JINX/FEMALE READER. Most chapters contain SMUT and or FLUFF, there is LIGHT ANGST in a few.

Important notes: Reader refers to Jinx often as Pj, for a term of endearment and rare but occasional reference to Jinx as Powder, by the people closest to her, as this is set after her redemption arc she does not mind it used in context!! But still prefers and continues to go by Jinx. She is mainly referred to as Jinx in the story and by the characters in it, don’t worry! Jinx is canonically bisexual in this story. I do not own any of these characters, I just play with them. 

Warning: Story will contain VERY graphic depictions of WLW, main coupling will consist of two switches to keep everyone happy. I’ll shut up now and I really hope you enjoy!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The weekend was spent at the Firelights, you’d had a fantastic time with everyone, campfires and dancing late into the night and you really developed a soft spot for Ekko and Scar, it was pretty obvious how much they all cared about each other, the bond of their friendships was obvious, even when they all ganged up to tease each other. You felt kind of at home there and welcomed in a way you hadn’t experienced before on any of your travels. Zaun was really starting to feel like home now and you’d made some amazing friends. 

The next couple of weeks were kind of a blur, Jinx, Ekko and Scar all worked hard on putting the bathroom together. They were fixing up a proper shower and bathroom area, instead of the broken pipe Jinx had. While you and Vi moved some cheap furniture into the arcade space. Even Jinx was impressed with how it looked with more of a cosy living space inside. 

Your trip to Bilgewater was still causing some small contention between you and Jinx. She wasn’t happy you were going but understood. She’d managed to control her snarky comments to a few a week. You’d sit in her lap, kiss her pouty face all over and just learned to ignore it, she was only saying it because she’d miss you. So there was no point in fighting about it. You were going. That was that. You had paid for your spot on the ship for Bilgewater and were set to head off for two weeks by the end of the this week. Jinx and the boys were working like mad to get the bathroom finished. Occasionally working late into the night, so they stayed at the arcade and you stayed at Cait and Vi’s so you could actually get some sleep away from the noise of welding, banging and loud music Jinx liked to blare while she was working. Always her favourite artist Mako, because it ‘helped her focus.’

Today you were taking them all lunch and wanted to see how they were getting on with everything. Before you got there you headed down to a rougher part of The Lanes to organise something. Meeting a shifty peddler in the alleyway, you hand him a small coin purse. He tips it into his hand, counting your contribution. Nodding he gives you some hand written directions. You place them securely in a secret pocket in your nap sack thanking him, before heading to the arcade. 

Once inside the arcade you find Jinx sitting on the floor in her work overalls, Ekko bending down beside her and Scar fitting some pipes together. 

“Hey guys!” You said stepping inside with three bags of lunch for them all. 

“Baby!!” Jinx said from the floor throwing her arms up for you to go hug her. You dish out the lunches to the boys first, before bending down and placing a kiss on Jinx’s head. She wraps an arm around your legs. 

“Mine!” She informs the room. You pet her head. 

The boys are really happy with the surprise lunch delivery you made them, telling Jinx how lucky she is. She beamed and said she knew. 

“How’s it going?” You asked gesturing to the pieces of metal strewn all over the floor. 

“We ran into a snag.” Ekko lets you know. 

“But nothing we can’t figure out, guys. Come on.” Jinx said optimistically. 

“Take it I’m staying at Cait’s tonight then?” You ask, half joking.

“Babe, you’ve been there two nights in a row. I thought you were staying here tonight?” She whines with annoyance. 

You continue. “If you’re figuring it out and you guys need more time to work then…”

Jinx cuts you off. “More time to work?! We’re busting our asses over here!” 

“I didn’t mean it like that, Honey. I just meant…”

Jinx interrupts you again. “Fine, if you wanna be a permanent Piltie fixture ‘til you leave.”

“Pj…” you try to reason. 

“Just forget it, guess I’ll see you whenever.” She replies tersely. 

“Jinx.” Ekko sadly interjects. 

“She wants to go, let her go.” Jinx said turning back to the project in her hands.

“If you wanted me to stay tonight I will, I just thought…” you said as Jinx cuts you off once again. 

“Well, I don’t. So you can go. See ya.”

“Ok. I’ll go then.” You say sadly. She was in a mood, you weren’t going to argue in front of the boys. Bending down you try kissing Jinx’s cheek goodbye. She sharply turns her head, pulling away from you. “I need to get this done.” She tells you.

Your heart hurt a little as she does so. “Ooook, bye guys.” You say, voice filled with a mix of sadness, confusion and irritation. 

They smile weakly. Scar raising a hand to wave sadly. You leave the arcade hearing Ekko call Jinx out. “Jinx, you were kind of a butthole.”

“Shut up, Mr Perfect!” You hear her reply, her voice raised slightly in anger. 

“Always the hot head.” Ekko berated her calmly. 

You hear a clang, as if something was thrown in a tantrum. Shaking your head. You march back to Piltover, a mixture of hurt and irritated. 

                     ~~~~~~~~

Night came, you were in bed at the Kiramman’s. Trying to figure out exactly what you’d said to make Jinx react so harshly, she was impossible when she was in a bad mood. She’d never let you get a word in edgewise. The more you thought about it, the more irritated you got. 

                        ~~~~~~~~

It was early hours of the morning and Jinx tossed and turned in her bed. Still not able to sleep. Speaking out loud to a version of Silco she kept in her head. 

“I didn’t mean to get so pissy. But like, would it kill ‘er to spend some actual time with me?! I’m doing everything I can to make her happy and she still complains! Annoying, ungrateful, sexy... Dickhead!”

“You’re slipping, Jinx” Jinx hears Silco say in her mind. 

“I’m not slipping, I’m just trying to be helpful. I want to make her things, so she’s happy. Did the same for you often enough.” Jinx said out loud again to an empty room, tossing onto her side. 

“This is why I never got married.” Imaginary Silco said. 

“Oh that’s why?” Jinx mumbled at him. 

“They take you for granted, Jinx.” Silco warned her. 

“You’re not helping! Go away!” She snapped. With that the image of Silco she conjured had disappeared.

“… Fuck, now I miss her infuriating ass!… I’ve been working on this for two weeks straight! Ungrateful, irritating…. sexy, bitch.” Jinx huffed to herself, tossing and turning. “Fuck this!” She said throwing the covers off of herself, pulling off one of your T-shirts she was attempting to sleep in she started to get dressed and left the arcade for Piltover. 

Jinx dropped soundlessly into a Kiramman’s hallway, from the tall window she jimmied.

“Which fucking way?” She whispered to herself. 

She carefully opened the first door she came across. Squinting her eyes in the dark, she saw the bed sheets moving. She heard Cait’s voice. “Oh, Vi. Oh… oh.”

Jinx turned around fast, silently heaving dramatically. Clutching her ears like she was having a break down. She swiftly moved down the hall to the next door, shuddering, sticking her tongue out and fake gagging herself with her finger. Opening the second door and peeping in, she very clearly saw you sleeping on your back.

“Oh that’s sweet, one of us can still sleep like a baby.” She grumbled to herself. 

She entered the room closing the door without a sound and approached your bed, bending down before you, she blew cold air onto your face.  

                      ~~~~~~~~

You felt something stirring in the room and woke up with a jolt, pulling the knife you sometimes slept with under your pillow, Jinx caught your wrist inches from her face.

“Well, hello to you too, Sweet Cheeks.” She said sarcastically.

“What are you doing here?! You freaked me out.” You stated indignantly, trying to keep your voice low. Jinx took the knife from you. 

“Impressive reflexes by the way, Doll.” She joked sitting on the bed, tossing the knife on the bedside table, it made a loud clattering sound in the stillness of the room. 

“I can’t sleep.” Jinx confesses. 

“I didn’t mean to piss you off, I was just asking a question and you lost it for no reason.” You tell her trying to keep your voice low. 

“I have a fantastic reason! I’m busting my hump trying to get this finished before you go and you’re not even there half the time!” Jinx retorts, her voice raising above a whisper. 

“So you came all this way to pick a fight about it in the dead of night?” You whisper back, irritation in your voice. 

“What, you like it better here or something, my place not fancy enough?” Jinx said mocking you, raising her voice slightly again and throwing her hands up, just as annoyed as you are.

That last statement really offended you.

“What?! How can you say that? You told me to leave remember? Gods, you are being such a jerk right now.” You reply, own voice raising with annoyance. 

“And now we’re name calling. Great!” Jinx said loudly. Her arms now folded across her chest. 

“I’m not doing this. You’re gonna wake everyone up. I’m tired and I wanna go to sleep. Just go and I’ll come by tomorrow. We can fight about it then, ok?” You say running a hand over your face. Trying to lower your voice and keep your anger in check. 

“Fine, I’ll go.” Jinx said in a dejected tone, understanding now how you felt earlier when she sent you away. It stung. She stood and headed to the door.

You got out of the bed. “Wait, Pj. Let me see you to the main door.” You say, feeling a little bad, you know how it felt to be told to go, you start to follow her across the bedroom. 

“Door? You think I came through the door? That’s a good one.” She tried to joke, but her voice falling flat of its usual exuberance.

You walk with her out to the hallway. She gestures to the window where she got in. You snuff a quiet laugh through your nose, classic Jinx. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow?” You ask, placing a hand on her shoulder. She turns to face you. 

“Yeah.” she says softly, feeling dumb that any of this happened. “Come back tomorrow, I’ve barely seen you in three days. You’re gonna be leaving soon.” 

Her expression tugging at your heart strings. You step forward and hug her. It makes your heart ache a little when she wraps her arms around your neck, burying her nose against the side of your face, making a small rocking motion with you in her arms. You pull back and can’t resist kissing her goodbye. Her lips are soft and she kisses you back tenderly, cupping your face. You sigh at the softness of the kiss. Jinx gently pushes you against the door frame, leaning into you. Your arms move around her small waist. 

“I’m sorry.” She said, pulling back from the kiss. “I shouldn’t have told you to go. I didn’t want you to go.” 

“I’m sorry.” You tell her “I never meant to pressure you, I don’t care about the…”

Jinx presses her lips against yours, shutting you up. You stand in the hallway, kissing against the doorframe, Jinx finding her way under your shirt to squeeze your butt, eliciting a small moan from you. Just then a small clank and a light shines in your direction, startling you both. 

“Jinx?” Vi’s voice calls out. Holding up a small lantern in your direction. “What are you doing?” 

“I wanted to say goodnight to my girlfriend. Is that an arrest-able offence, Officer?” Jinx asked in an incredulous tone. Raising a hand to shield her eyes. 

“Kinda, when you break in, in the middle of the night.” Vi fired back, she was not in the mood for Jinx’s shit. 

“She was just leaving. Honestly, Vi. Sorry if we woke you.” You try to mediate between the sisters. 

“Ok. Just keep it down, Cait is sleeping.” Vi said turning back towards her room, before stopping and holding the lamp up towards Jinx again. “Did you open this door?” Vi asked, gesturing to her bedroom. 

“No. Why would I?” Jinx answered nonchalantly.

“Swore I shut this thing. Anyway, Goodnight, keep it down, ok?” Vi warned pointing towards Jinx, then to you.

Jinx saluted. “Sir, yes sir.” She said in her best enforcer voice.

Vi walked off to her room shaking her head. “Dumbass.” You heard her mumble as she closed the door behind her. 

You both chuckled softly before kissing one last time. Jinx pulled away regretfully. “I better get going.” she said sorrowfully, her eyes big and sad. 

“Fuck, come ’ere.” You tell her, grabbing her face kissing her again and pulling her back with you into the bedroom. 

[clumsydolly]

so my thoughts on obey me as someone whos completed both games and played for maybe 4 years

Things I liked:

I always enjoyed that every character is unique in personality and design and that everyone is datable so there Arnt any routes. I loved seasons 1-3 of the og game, I always look fondly on season 3 though because of how it took place in the human world, was more domestic and we got nice lore drops that didn't feel shoved in. I liked the stakes of season 1 and 2 so but id have to say season 2 is my second favorite because of how it expanded more on the first season. I do wish there was a little more worldbuilding and consistency, but I'm not too pressed about it since it does leave things open ended enough for the fandom to exist creatively in.

Season 2 of nightbringer was also good up until the end, which is where my grievances start appearing.

Things I didnt like

There was a LOT retconning in Nightbringer, which made things so confusing that I just disregard most of it as non-canon if they dont fit with what I had imagined in the first game. My two biggest peeves though are

1.) The focus on forgiving the celestial realm/ their father).

-It felt really weird how hard they were pushing the idea that the celestial realm wasn't that bad and disregarding how oppressive it was and how their father literally tried to execute their sister. I understand missing the realm (it was their home after all) and any angel living there being good people, but I'm definitely not okay with forgiving their father (god?). That guy is abusive asf, if there was ever a villain of the story, it has always been that guy. I wish I could have seen more of the characters talk about their familial (religious) trauma and not exclusively Lucifer or Simeon (which was already rare enough and the retconned at the very end).

2.) The lack of a overall plot.

-We started the story with the goal of being the one to master them all, as well as achieving Diavolo's goal of bringing peace to the 3 realms. Problem is that we never got there. The celstial realm is still oppressed, I dont even think the majority of the human world knows demon and angels exist, nor do anyone who knows seems very interested in peace. Diavolo is still the crown prince (which is fine I guess) and we never got to meet Michael. Luke still dosent seem to understand the prejudices of the Celestial Realm and we still dont know much about Solomons past, eg: who was his first aprentice, how did he meet Barb, how did he fight all of the Devildom, what was his time like as king, his family.

We never actually made any big changes, and now the games over.

Miscellaneous thoughts I have:

Don't like the same gag being used excessively for the same characters

I wish I could have seen Satans birthmark :/ its on his back

I would have liked to know more about what happened during the war, but it probably might have been too drab for the game

I think Simeons arc of not being an angel should have just left him a human

The sibling interactions in the game are hilarious

Wish there were more characters, even briefly, the cast feels a little lonely :(

The mc is perfect

Okay okay! First thank you for asking dear! 💕

Now, I'm about to yap my head off so get ready lol.

Now I too love the characters I have such a soft spot for them all especially since I found the game right when covid happened and I had to be inside all the time so the game is such a comfort thing for me. I love the designs but Satan's sweater is fucking annoying ngl but other than that no complaints! I also loved that Obey me! allowed us to date everyone but I remembered people being upset about there being no routes so I'll probably have a lot of routes so people can just pick, "do I want a harem?" "Do I wanna only be with 1,2,3,4,5,7 of them?" Ya get the point!

I truthfully haven't moved past season 3 so everything I know about both that and Nightbringer is from media or my friends but I do in fact also love 2 and parts of season 3 I feel like they were just so cute cause everyone was still figuring out their feelings and it gave us more info on how everything was going on after we left and stuff and season 3 is so domestic in the human world (also how did they get a place like I know they are the top 1% in the Devildom and it's said they can persuade humans, ➖ Mc, sorcerers and witches. But like come seriously?! How!?) I love seeing them all interact cause it's so cute and funny.

I agree the world building definitely needs to be expanded on and more fleshed out we only go to a few different places and when we do it's like we were the only people there lol, no I interactions with anyone outside the cast fr.

Again I haven't played Nightbringer I will now that I plan on writing but Irdgaf in the beginning cause everyone was like "ehhhh" "why's there need to be another game??" "Tf?" So I decided to just kinda ignore it especially since people said they didn't really like it and as you said didn't agree with where it was going so I'll talk more on that when I subject myself to that.

O.M.G

You have no idea how much this rattles me! WHY DO THEY NEED TO FORGIVE THEIR FATHER IN THE FIRST PLACE?! Like I was always annoyed by that. I mean their Dad fucking killed their little sister and exiled the brothers I mean lookkkkkkk

Got this from @flemmingbamse btw so thank you!!! 💕

They literally were exiled from their home and were forced to become a whole other species and they lost their wings/had their wings changed completely. Lucifer gave fucking birth from his back apparently which is how we get Satan and Satan is obviously wearing Lucifer's 2 lost wings and I mean imagine your so fucking pissed you have a god damn child from your anger. Like apagejsjakaopahaiqkqh. Their status in heaven? Gone. Family? Besides each other, Gone. Lilith? Dead. Their home? Not their home anymore. Anyone else they love, who fr weren't a real one low-key. (Kinda looking at Simeon but it's obvious he regrets it so I'm blinking slowly) BUT Raphael? Michael? Actually I don't think Michael is god. God is god. Michael is a seraphim. So they are the children of God or Seraphim? Either way, BULLSHIT! everyone turned their backs on them. And that war I think it's a testament to how strong they are cause they went against ALL of heaven and still held their own granted they lost but they were against ALL of heaven and I think they only really lost cause of Lilith being hit by an arrow and Lucifer giving birth. (Still can't get over that). And I mean they got punished from heaven to hell, literally. So they are still being punished? Does Michael wanna be forgiven or not? Bitch ass fr. NO SYMPATHY.

I will come back to this but the Brothers definitely have religious trauma and I think that Simone started realizing that right before the war was happening when he had to fight Lucifer and saw he was on opposite sides of the battle filed and it's obvious he regrets it and wishes he fought on their side. I think it's a tell tale with how Luke acts and angles are told that God is great and Michael is great and everything they do is right. I mean look at how Luke admires- no, idolizes Michael. I think whenever he brings up Michael the brothers get really quiet and just nod along to just get him to shut up. I think there is super manipulation going on in heaven and only the higher angles, archangel and seraphim are aware of what is going on but not ALWAYS aware which is how Simone got started to officially realize just how wrong Michael's mindset is and started to oppose it silently and when he started getting louder and started falling for Mc this God and Michael got mad (idk fr its a thought tho). But I don't think heaven is it fr.

Now on the lack of plot everything did feel everywhere some times like some things we're just happening just cause and I feel like Dia's dream was kinda side tracked and after Mc got pacts things were just kinda happening lol. Ngl I think Michael's bitch. Not sure if y'all could tell but yeah. Still I'd like to know more about him too. Now Solomon the shady sorcerer we know and love. Now I heard some people say that they think he was Lilith's lover, the one who she and is the whole reason the war happened, fell in love with and tried to save with a potion which is why Solomon has lived so long. But I'm not too sure about that cause other sorcerers and witches also live super long probably because they are more than likely taking potions or casting spells and he'd probably do that too cause he's one of the great sorcerers and I think it was said that it was another guy Lilith was with but I don't remember. Also irrelevant but, It's said that man got like 300 wives or some shit so he's a whor- Truthfully, I need to think about him a bit more cause I feel like I could say anything about him for real cause that mf is SHADY! lol but I think Asmo would be a bit easy for him to get a pact with since, well, he's Asmo, and I mean look at their relationship. but Asmo did also give the Mc a hard time when they were trying to get his pact so idk. BUT what I wanna know is how that mf got Barbatos to get in a pact with him CAUSE I KNOW THAT MF HATE THAT SHADY OLD MAN I SWEAR- but it's obvious Babs has some sort of animosity towards Sol so I don't know what to think about that.

Hmmm I don't know exactly what you mean by gags but if you mean the same trope or joke being done I totally get that.

When Satan came out of Lucifer he took 2 of his wings with him. Satan has a birth mark on his back in the exact same spot Lucifer lost his wings and both the scar on Lucifer's back and Satan's birthmark look exactly the same.

Ngl I'mma flesh out that whole war and all those bitch ass angles fr. With all their eyes and shit and apparently can't see the BS right in front of em. ALSO there has been so many games/shows where angles are these fuckass manipulative oppressive hypocritical beings who are like kinda crazy and they throw a lot of religious trauma in there fr and I'm not mad at it. Also I think angle's true forms are ugly/scary (I don't know the feeling honestly) . Like uglier/scarier than the demon's true forms. Maybe that's just me. I don't know.

Simone....I'm not sure if I wanted him to be a human or demon but I definitely don't think he should have gone back to being an angel. There was no point in that and it could have helped emphasize how he loved the brothers and wanted to be with his brothers and he should have been in the first place on their side. It could have shown how he was learning just how wrong the war even happening in the first place was. Him going back to being an angel just, like for me at least, completely ruins that while plotline. It's stupid. I'm not sure which is better for him to be, demon or human, but he won't end an Angle that's for sure.

Yes as I said too lonely definitely needs more characters and will happily add them and will take any requests or oc's or anything. The mc is amazing lol

I'm happy to hear anyone's ideas and as always reblogs are loved and appreciated. I'd love anything anyone could give me! 🩷

[deathlessathanasia]

I dont like Rhea.If I worked that hard to save my 5 older children from my cannibal husband’s belly

I sure the hell would not stand by

…as Zeus cannibalizes his pregnant wife/my niece who saved my other kids by making my husband throw them up

…as Zeus constantly cheats on, humiliates, and actively abuses Hera, my own daughter

…& support Zeus’s homewrecking side hoe over my daughter who got cheated on

…as Zeus rapes a bunch of poor mortal women

…as Hera punishes those women (what kind of mother supports the willing mistress who insulted Hera but not Zeus’s victims)

…as Hades kidnap-marries my granddaughter organized by Zeus without even a heads up to her mother Demeter

…as Poseidon rapes Demeter while she’s searching for her missing daughter

…as Zeus shapeshifts into Hades to rape Persephone, his own daughter

She is a pick me boy mom who doesn't care about any of her children besides Zeus. She doesn't stand up against Zeus knowing damn well that Hera cant

I get what you're saying and it's certainly possible to explore Rhea as a morally ambiguous figure (she does after all stand by as Kronos eats 5 of their children in most versions), but I don't think it is reasonable to expect such interventions from her in the myths. These are not real people with consistent personalities and morals, they are (in this specific context) characters with particular roles in a narrative. If a story has no need of Rhea to be present, then she is not going to be included in it. It's that simple. Why does she appear in the Homeric Hymn 2 to Demeter? Likely because she is the mother of both Zeus and Demeter, which makes her a fitting mediator between them. Maybe also because the narrative is concerned with family bonds and relationships between women, so who better to help Demeter (a goddess who had lost and recovered her daughter) come to terms with the new order of things, with her girl having become a woman, than her own mother? Why is Rhea present on Delos for Apollo's birth in Homeric Hymn 3? Well, obviously it is meant to glorify the recipient of the hymn, hence why all goddesses except for Hera are there. Even Hera's enmity glorifies Apollo since it is caused by her envy at the greatness of Leto's son. This is not a narrative about homewrecking, but about the birth and integration in the pantheon of one of the most important gods. Leto is not Zeus's side hoe but his respectable consort whom most deities seem to like and esteem. Why does Kybele/Rhea sometimes raise and instruct Dionysos? Presumably because of the similarities between them and their rites, as pointed out for instance in Strabo's Geography 10.3.13.

In many other stories, by contrast, Rhea's presence would serve no purpose. The cannibalism of Metis? That is (primarily, though there is a more symbolic meaning to this too) about Zeus evading the succession cycle and proving himself more successful than his predecessors. Rhea played her own role in this cycle, it's not her business anymore. Besides, it is not only Rhea who takes no issue with this, not a single god does: not Zeus's siblings, not Metis's parents or siblings or even daughter. Morally speaking, it is a non-issue for everyone because the narrative doesn't require it to be an issue; Metis quite literally exists to be ingested and assimilated. Zeus cheating on Hera? Zeus and Poseidon raping? Those myths are primarily about the birth of various gods and heroes. What would forcing Rhea into these narratives accomplish? She is not needed, so she plays no role, just as other goddess mothers don't get involved when their sons assault or kidnap women. Why would they? Those myths are not about them. Hera taking revenge on the occasional woman? Again, has a specific purpose (gotta explain Io's connection with Egypt somehow), is required by the narrative. Rhea is not needed.

I should also point out that Rhea herself can be powerless before Zeus. You mentioned the Orphic tale where Zeus impregnates Persephone in the guise of Hades, yet Orphic tradition infamously also involves Zeus forcing himself on his own mother.

Now if you were to write a story based on the myths in which Rhea would be aware of all the things you mentioned, would be able to do something effective about them and would not care to, I agree she'd look pretty bad.

[genericpuff]

On this week's episode of "Webtoon Controversies That Could Have Been Avoided If Only They Had Some Damn Quality Control"-

Oh boy, prepare yourselves, there's some TEA on this one.

Quantum Entanglement, a new Webtoon Originals series from creator Arts Angel (aka Sarah Ellerton) is uh... a teeny weeny painfully obvious that it was made with AI.

AI is getting better, but when it comes to comics, there are still a lot of "tells" you can pick up on once you know where to look. Hands are certainly one of them.

Not knowing how to draw hands efficiently and consistently is definitely an Artist Problem(tm) but it becomes a lot more obvious it was made by AI when you get weird little off-putting mistakes like a fingernail being just a little too long or missing joints (hot dog fingers, eyo) or the distinction between fingers not being clear.

But there's also hair and other detailed parts that are often lost in the translation process between prompt to final piece. Jewelry, text on a screen, phones, that sort of thing. The insinuation of a 'thing' is there, but it's like looking at it through a fishbowl.

And ultimately, a lot of AI art tends to just be a little too 'perfect'. Everything is just a little too smooth for it to look like it was naturally made by a person. Faces end up veering into the uncanny valley territory and there are inconsistencies between the eyes and the rest of the body. Backgrounds become lost in what I like to call "AI goop", becoming nothing more than weird blurred/filtered out insinuations of what's supposed to be behind the character.

Basically, at this point, it's undeniably clear that AI is being used to create this comic. While there are also plenty of signs in the handiwork that show a human was involved in some parts, there are other places that are undeniably filled in with the use of AI. So it's not necessarily a 100% made-by-AI comic, but it's absolutely AI assisted.

But what's REALLY absurd about this whole situation? The creator denies it. To the point of including a disclaimer in the first episode trying to "get ahead" of people who are assuming it's AI by saying, "No, it's not made with AI, here's the proof! Don't look at the blood on my hands or the body in the trunk of my car!"

Now, first off, the absolute absurdity of making yourself look guiltier by trying to prove your innocence before people have even started to suspect you... I'd like to think that this was edited into the first episode after the initial accusations started rolling in but considering it's an Originals series, it's hard to know if it was, as creators typically don't get as much control over just editing their episodes on the fly like Canvas creators do. Typically it's their editors who do that sort of thing for them. And even if it was edited in afterwards, it's still there for people who have no idea going into the comic blind and might not automatically assume it was made with AI, so it just looks like you're bringing up the potential of AI being used completely unprovoked. By planting the idea in your audience's brain that AI is even a question, you're making them suspect everything.

It's kind of like when Dream was suspected of cheating in a way-too-lucky-to-be-real speedrun of Minecraft a couple years back, so he went to all these painstaking efforts of hiring a quantum physicist to "prove" his innocence with a straight up THESIS documenting all of the reasons he couldn't have cheated through math and figures and jargon. Ironically, this just made Dream look guiltier, and sure enough, he eventually admitted he had cheated.

That said, did you notice something in that "art process" pic?

That finished panel isn't even what showed up in the final comic.

So the absurdity of this all, again, just makes Arts Angel look a lot more guilty of actually using AI, especially when it's basically undeniable in so many of those panels above. People don't paint like that.

But that brings us to talking about Sarah Ellerton, aka "Arts Angel", the creator. Many long-time readers of her work are defending this, claiming that she has, in fact, "always drawn like this".

What's insane? She actually is who she says she is. This isn't like some kid who came out of the woodwork with AI and claiming that they had 20 years of experience, Sarah Ellerton's main site, The Seraph-Inn, has been live and crawled by Wayback Machine as far back as 2005.

And you can see the art evolution over the years, starting with Inverloch-

-into Phoenix-

-and all the way to Immaterial-

But here's the thing about that last comic. The main protagonist is, apparently, the same girl from Quantum Entanglement, the newest installment in this series where it becomes abundantly clear the creator has started using AI.

You can see the effects of this being parsed through AI, because she's gone from being a unique character with two-toned hair and darker skin, to being turned into a generic Instagram anime girl. And lemme tell you, AI used in comics has NOT gotten better at depicting darker-skinned characters (I actually tested an AI-coloring tool WT was planning on putting out a year or two ago, it was uh... not great.)

But the most damning thing about Sarah?

She works in IT.

That on its own wouldn't be so telling if it weren't for the 20 years she clearly spent actually honing her craft, only to suddenly switch to using AI as a crutch.

Quantum Entanglement was picked up for Originals in July 2023. It launched two days ago, with four free to read episodes and 6 more under the FastPass paywall. Three months after it got picked up. That turnaround speed is insane for an Originals series. Now, I'm more inclined to believe that maybe she's using the exact same pages she used in the Canvas version (there's unfortunately no way of checking through Wayback, it never crawled the Canvas version, so unless someone has backups of the Canvas pages they're willing to share, we'll never know) but that short turnaround time is insane for a comic that's this insanely detailed. It likely means they didn't need much pre-production time to get a strong buffer going, and that it doesn't take them as long to produce these episodes on a weekly basis so they could be under way less crunch than creators who do this by hand.

By comparison, the winners of the Call to Action contest from last year are STILL working on their pre-production. Many other greenlit Canvas series are known for getting picked up and stuck in pre-production for several months and even a year or more simply due to how the company operates with when it chooses to launch these series and how much pre-production is necessary. Some creators have literally said that their pre-production was done, but WT still kept them waiting to launch. So three months for a freshly greenlit Canvas series to launch is NOT the norm.

All that said, I feel for the people who are trying to defend her. But it's so undeniably AI with the creator herself providing fake proof that it makes it really sad to think that this person was honing their craft for 20 years just to wind up utilizing AI. Being a good artist does not make you immune to the temptation of using cheap methods or developing bad habits. Going through "the struggle" does not make you immune to taking shortcuts that wind up cheapening your work or taking advantage of the work of others.

Now, maybe Sarah trained AI around her art. If this didn't play out the way it did, I'd be willing to give her benefit of the doubt and assume that. Training AI off your own work, while still up for debate as to how ethical that is, at least doesn't hurt other artists, because it's your own work the AI is "stealing". There are definitely ways AI could be used to make life easier for artists without replacing the art process entirely, the same way artists have learned to use 3D assets and digital art filters to make their process more efficient and boost the quality of their art up to the next level.

But the fact that she's being so cagey over it, claiming she's not using AI period when she very clearly is, providing "proof" that actually proves she definitely used AI, while operating under a penname that's strangely similar to a name Grimes - former tech wife of Elon Musk and staunch supporter of AI - used for one of her studio albums-

- that's what makes it a lot more clear she's using it maliciously.

The AI is very likely trained off another artist's work. Maybe someone whose art style is similar enough to hers that she could integrate it into her own and pass it off as legitimate. Someone whose art style is cartoonish but still modern, like if Disney made anime. Someone who's so prolific and consistent in their stylization that training an AI off it would seem like a no brainer to those who want to replicate that style quickly and easily.

Damn. What a disappointment. Do better, Sarah.

And for god's sakes, Webtoons, pay more fucking attention. I've been steadily picking away at moving the entirety of my comics over to other platforms on a weekly schedule, but at this point I kinda just wanna dump the last 30 or so chapters onto ComicFury all at once so I can ditch this platform for good, especially if it turns out AI comics getting greenlit is a feature, not a bug. The ratings for Quantum Entanglement have dropped significantly overnight, now sitting around 5.09 and still dropping, but is Webtoons going to do anything about it? That remains to be seen.

[missycolorful]

I think I'll just say this: I don't agree when people call any of the islanders "bad parents" just because their parenting is flawed.

Like, parents and their parenting is flawed. Inherently. One parent cannot meet all the demands of their child; it is literally impossible. As humans are imperfect, there will always be something missing or lacking in one's parenting. Hell, sometimes even two parents can't meet all their child's needs, depending on their personalities. If that's the case, then I guess all parents are bad parents. But that's not the case, so I don't get why people are so adamant when they see that a parent isn't handling things 100% perfectly and go "wow this person's parenting sucks."

And this is even more so when you take into account... pretty much everything going on in Quesadilla island. These people never really planned to be parents, yet here they are! And this island is out to kill these kids, so it's also a dangerous game of survival now, too! There are horrors around pretty much every corner. Plus, outside or inside forces are making the islanders suffer very often. The islanders are never okay. How they take care of their children is going to be different just by the very basis of their environment. The standards of parenting are different here. Their relationships with people, including their children, were never going to be 100% healthy or positive or okay. It's just not possible.

so, no, I don't think that just cause, say, q!Tubbo or q!Phil aren't great in regards to their emotional intelligence and often isolate themselves, or when any other parents in general don't handle what their children are going through perfectly, that they're bad parents. That kinda statement feels like it diminishes pretty much all the hard work and effort and love they put into taking care of their kids and even kids that aren't their own. Tubbo gives his everything for Sunny, and was/is an active babysitter for a lot of other eggs. Phil works so hard to love and teach survival to and take care of his two eggs equally. (Like, being 'basically' a single parent, of one or WORSE, two, is already hard enough in the real world - imagine being one on this fucking hellscape they're on).

Like, I don't think there's anything wrong with pointing out the parents' flaws. Their flaws make them human, and it'd be foolish to disregard their humanity. And it's interesting to analyze their flaws and what they say about the character, and how they impact their family. There's nuance there, and it should be discussed.

But I think when you're just going "oh, they're bad at parenting in general" because they fumble the bag in other departments lacks nuance. Sure, if you're just saying "they're bad when it comes to certain aspects of parenting," that's a different story, because that's understanding their flaws while recognizing that those flaws don't define all of their parenting. But to just say they're bad at it in general isn't productive analysis of their characters in any way. I haven't watched q!Phil take care of his egg for a whole year (followed by a second egg more consistently shortly after) only for people to shit on his parenting just because his lack emotional intelligence is more noticeable as of recent due to all the trauma and bullshit he's endured. And I haven't seen q!Tubbo put his whole heart into taking care of Sunny as well as multiple other eggs, being Chayanne and Tallulah's reliable godfather, just for people to put down his efforts because he's not always great at more emotionally in depth conversations. They're good parents in a lot of ways, and those strengths shouldn't be discredited just because they aren't good at other things. Their characters deserve way better than that.

tldr these parents are all good in many regards and are just trying their damn best in the worst of circumstances, can we cut them just a bit of slack, please?

[utilitycaster]

ok I'm getting some extremely missing the point notes on my Nein gender presentation post so this is a very informal, extremely basic, "I do not have a gender/queer studies degree so there is certainly nuance I am missing," rundown. Obviously there's overlap, but they are separate interrelated concepts.

Gender presentation is how you present - the face you put to the world - appearance, and the basics of how you talk and act. A butch trans woman, a butch cis woman, a transmasc nb person, and a genderfluid person on a particular day might all present rather similarly! However, they do not share the same gender identities. My post is about presentation - Fjord putting a very masculine presentation forward, Beau being interested in masculine presentation despite identifying throughout as a woman, Veth as a metaphor in disguising herself as halfling early on.

Gender identity is who you are. Your identity and presentation often line up, but not necessarily! This becomes obvious if someone deliberately changes their presentation either voluntarily (genderfluid people have an identity that often involves presenting differently depending on how they feel that day) or involuntarily to avoid discrimination (a trans person presenting as their birth gender to avoid a confrontation in an unsafe place). The identity does not change - a trans woman who needs to present as a man temporarily does not stop being a trans woman.

Gender roles/norms are often about preferences, associations, and cultural stereotypes about gender (particularly when perceived as a binary, even though, obviously, it is not). Math, physical labor, and dominance (for example) are typically seen as masculine. Crafts, caretaking, and submission are typically seen as feminine. Blue is a boy color and pink is a girl color. The post mentioned in one of the reblogs, about Caleb Widogast's story being one often given to female characters, fits here. Caleb himself presents as a man; you can read him as either cis or trans as neither is, if I recall, hard-confirmed, but he was a teen boy when the events of his backstory occurred; his presentation and his identity are both consistently that of a boy or man. This can bleed into or affect presentation, ie, many boys refusing to wear pink because they see it as a girl color, or women who are more stoic getting called cold whereas men who are more stoic getting approval for the same exact behavior, but "being good at/interested in math" is not an element of presentation.

Everyone has a gender presentation and identity, and every culture has ideas of gendered behaviors, though what is seen as what gender (and the idea of gender as a binary in the first place) shifts with time and place. Cis heterosexual people have a gender presentation and identity; it's just usually "that of their assigned gender at birth" (and even then, there are cis het people who are gender non-conforming in various ways even as they identify as their birth gender).

And finally, as a bit of a coda, there's also "experiences that are associated with queer people, either in terms of gender or sexuality, but are not themselves proof positive of a queer identity." The really obvious one, and I will use Caleb again, is that Caleb does not go by his birth name. "Bren" is not his deadname. He stopped using it because he was a fugitive; it is utterly unrelated to a change in his gender identity. The act of changing one's name is both a practice that is 100% a very common trans experience, and also, some people just do it for other reasons, so it is undeniably relatable to many trans people but having a changed name does not automatically mean the former one is a deadname, which is unique to trans people. I've used this example before but a lot of queer people relate to tieflings; however, so did Unati, an (afaik straight and cis) black African woman, for similar reasons of being othered. Relatable/metaphorical does not necessarily mean canonical nor exclusively that reading - to be clear, again, a reading of Caleb as trans or a reading of tieflings as queer metaphor are both valid, but neither are the sole valid reading.