#missy rambles

[dragonbleps]

survived checking my bank account. i deserve a little treat

[missycolorful]

the way Ender King's greed-filled manipulation has been slow yet still fairly noticeable on q!Philza, is fascinating. It's the little things that ring loud.

It's q!Phil constantly saying "I'm poor" when he has thousands of coins and plenty of tasks he can do to gain more.

It's him trying to create a scam with the seashells as lootboxes, only to forego the idea, because he's too immersed in opening the seashells for loot on his own.

It's all the casual stealing and looting that would be normal among the rest of the islanders, but there's something more... obsessive in the way Phil does it.

It's him saying "Gotta get more things for me and my eggs," as he clutches two crying obsidian in his inventory, before the screen fades on today's stream.

Phil's all like "it's probably fine," as he sits at the balcony of his home, overlooking the horizon. He was looking around, as if expecting to see something. But the problem is, the Ender King isn't gonna just appear outta nowhere to claim him. He's being careful, slow, and methodical about all this, disturbingly so.

He's slowly corrupting q!Phil. The Ender King is already here.

[adonis-koo]

idk when I’ll actually write again, but have some sweet nothing!JK being just a little horny for MC on main 😭

[noamuth]

Dal cooking a meal for the group, and Astarion's like "Why's he doing that? Is this the day he poisons us all?"

They take their shares of food and Shadowheart's like "Should we be sniffing for poison?" Meanwhile Lae'zel smelled for poison immediately.

Dal's just like "I would be insulted if you did not." Unsure if he's joking or serious.

Permission to sniff, granted. Who sniffs? Who waits for others to sniff theirs before eating their own, so they don't feel rude by sniffing for themselves? Who just trusts him outright for whatever reason and starts eating?

[missyzero]

My apolocheese for drawing a goobery monkey god a lot. Gotta get him outta my brain!

[dragonbleps-fr]

Okay I know people are saving up(?) for NOTN but I have quite a few dragons for sale if anyone's interested!

The auctions expire in about 20 hours so if I'm not online to relist them just send a message

See my pinned for redirection to my lair and specific tabs!

[aeternumrex]

"This you?"

And someone shows Damon a picture of him doing something adorable while in an animal form

and he's like "Delete this immediately."

[dalamusrex]

Isran of the Dawnguard: *creating steel-clad juggernauts meant to be nigh impervious to attack and strike with the decisive brutality of a crocodile snapping its jaws shut*

Dal, who's been minding his business and being a Good Vampire, watching a Catcher go by for the first time:

[dragonbleps]

what artists dont tell you is that every compliment is actually 100 compliments because they'll go back to re-read it 100 times and it'll make them feel fuzzy all over again every single time

[dragonbleps]

The idea of only being able to shapeshift into things that do or have existed is kind of funny when you think about it

If you can't shapeshift into things that are made up, or things that don't currently exist but will in the future (such as breeds of dog), and you can't shapeshift into things you don't know about on account of not knowing about them, then learning about a new animal is like unlocking a node in a skill tree you didn't know existed lhjkhsdfg

You look up animal lists and it's like

[dragonbleps]

[missycolorful]

q!Phil's instinct to isolate will always be his undoing, and the Ender King knows and is trying to use that to his advantage.

That seemed pretty clear when q!Fit told Philza that Tallulah mentioned "someone that protected them." Never a name, just that. And yet, immediately, Philza went to find Tallulah and confront her. His attitude, his everything, changed drastically. It's as if Ender had pulled a bit harder at those puppet strings he has on Philza when he realized someone might figure out what's going on. Ender doesn't want anyone clueing in on what's going on. And why would he let himself slip like that, why would he get so - dare I say - desperate, if it weren't for the fact that he's afraid? He's afraid of Phil's loved ones finding out and them helping Philza defeat him.

Phil being confronted by his loved ones made him see what had become of him because of Ender. He was able to push back against the pull of the Ender King, a motherfucking deity who has been getting stronger and stronger bit by bit, because his children have helped ground him a bit more in reality, and are helping him realize that he's in danger (as well as tragically, in some sense, he's the danger).

And the impact his family has is noticeable. Despite everything, after getting rid of the backpack, Phil seemed to snap out of it a bit. He spoke with a lot more clarity on what was happening to him. His demeanor had quieted and calmed, a lot more like his old self, when he returned to his kids. And he sought to fix what he had done, to ensure he never hurts his kids again. It all worked, but only because he had his loved ones help him along the way.

Which is I, like many others, think that q!Phil's decision to leave and exile himself until Friday, while an understandable decision on such an emotional day, actually isn't going to benefit him like he thinks it will. He's going to be all alone, with only a crow in a cage to keep him company. And, certainly, Ender will be there, too, ready claw into his mind now that he's vulnerable again. Whether this exile doesn't fix anything at all or even makes things worse, it's hard to say for certain.

All that we can say is, with all this in mind, it makes you realize: the Ender King can be vanquished, even in this state. He wouldn't be so vocal, letting himself become so noticeable, if that weren't the case. The support of his friends and family are what pull Phil out of the void, guide him toward the realization that this is wrong, i need to fix this. Phil just needs to let them help. Because that love, so far, has been powerful enough to overwhelm Ender's control on him. And I don't know if that'll be enough if things get worse, but who knows on this island?

[missycolorful]

An underrated moment with Philza and Missa's reunion that I think needs more attention is when Missa's talking about all the traveling he's done. So Phil's just like "You must be in like a really special group with your airline." But when Missa tells him that's not the case, Phil suddenly grows defensive for Missa's sake.

"They should be rolling out the red carpet for you." "They should be giving you first class."

which, of course kinda makes sense considering q!Philza will always go to bat for Missa. From people calling him an absent parent or calling him poor, Phil always jumps to his defense. but seeing him do it directly to Missa is both sweet but also hilarious, considering all Missa is saying is I'm not getting special treatment during my constant flights and travels. And yet Philza is offended by this and is all HOW DARE THEY?!?

like, everyone may call q!Missa a wet cat, but q!Philza demands that his partner is given the respect he DESERVES!!

[missycolorful]

With Tallulah's book she gave Chayanne for his birthday, I'm starting to get an idea as to why she's starting to live off on her own at her and Wilbur's house.

"worthy of behaving as a child for once." She's more than aware of how much Chayanne puts into protecting her. How he sees himself as a warrior, a protector of not just her, but all of her siblings. And yes, I can see this as her trying to be more independent, as well. Her time running away with the group, and even being separated from Chayanne, gave her time to grow up and face the real world without q!Phil or Chayanne. Yes, she had Ramon and Dapper, but that time away from Chayanne probably allowed her some additional perspective toward her sibling. She probably gained awareness of how he led the group into running away, how he took care of them when it was just the six of them on their own. And at the end of the day, she realized: Chayanne's just a kid, just like her.

Yes, Chayanne being who he is has saved them in many situations. He needed to learn to fight and protect for the sake of himself and his loved ones. This was all important. But now that there's a bit less chaos going on, a bit less at stake (they even gained an additional life back upon waking up!), I think Tallulah wants to give him space to be a kid. She doesn't want him to feel like he has to be her protector all the time. He deserves some time to feel silly and sweet and sensitive.

So she gives him space. She goes to her own house to sleep, so Phil and Chayanne can have some time to themselves, and so Chayanne can just be a very young son of a father. Yes, she also gains something from this, it's not as if she's only doing this for her brother's sake. But I definitely think she took them both into consideration when making this decision to not sleep at Phil's all the time.

[missycolorful]

I think I'll just say this: I don't agree when people call any of the islanders "bad parents" just because their parenting is flawed.

Like, parents and their parenting is flawed. Inherently. One parent cannot meet all the demands of their child; it is literally impossible. As humans are imperfect, there will always be something missing or lacking in one's parenting. Hell, sometimes even two parents can't meet all their child's needs, depending on their personalities. If that's the case, then I guess all parents are bad parents. But that's not the case, so I don't get why people are so adamant when they see that a parent isn't handling things 100% perfectly and go "wow this person's parenting sucks."

And this is even more so when you take into account... pretty much everything going on in Quesadilla island. These people never really planned to be parents, yet here they are! And this island is out to kill these kids, so it's also a dangerous game of survival now, too! There are horrors around pretty much every corner. Plus, outside or inside forces are making the islanders suffer very often. The islanders are never okay. How they take care of their children is going to be different just by the very basis of their environment. The standards of parenting are different here. Their relationships with people, including their children, were never going to be 100% healthy or positive or okay. It's just not possible.

so, no, I don't think that just cause, say, q!Tubbo or q!Phil aren't great in regards to their emotional intelligence and often isolate themselves, or when any other parents in general don't handle what their children are going through perfectly, that they're bad parents. That kinda statement feels like it diminishes pretty much all the hard work and effort and love they put into taking care of their kids and even kids that aren't their own. Tubbo gives his everything for Sunny, and was/is an active babysitter for a lot of other eggs. Phil works so hard to love and teach survival to and take care of his two eggs equally. (Like, being 'basically' a single parent, of one or WORSE, two, is already hard enough in the real world - imagine being one on this fucking hellscape they're on).

Like, I don't think there's anything wrong with pointing out the parents' flaws. Their flaws make them human, and it'd be foolish to disregard their humanity. And it's interesting to analyze their flaws and what they say about the character, and how they impact their family. There's nuance there, and it should be discussed.

But I think when you're just going "oh, they're bad at parenting in general" because they fumble the bag in other departments lacks nuance. Sure, if you're just saying "they're bad when it comes to certain aspects of parenting," that's a different story, because that's understanding their flaws while recognizing that those flaws don't define all of their parenting. But to just say they're bad at it in general isn't productive analysis of their characters in any way. I haven't watched q!Phil take care of his egg for a whole year (followed by a second egg more consistently shortly after) only for people to shit on his parenting just because his lack emotional intelligence is more noticeable as of recent due to all the trauma and bullshit he's endured. And I haven't seen q!Tubbo put his whole heart into taking care of Sunny as well as multiple other eggs, being Chayanne and Tallulah's reliable godfather, just for people to put down his efforts because he's not always great at more emotionally in depth conversations. They're good parents in a lot of ways, and those strengths shouldn't be discredited just because they aren't good at other things. Their characters deserve way better than that.

tldr these parents are all good in many regards and are just trying their damn best in the worst of circumstances, can we cut them just a bit of slack, please?

[missycolorful]

Philza had an incredibly badass, intense moment when he killed the code pretending to be his son with the Code Breaker. But I can't help but think of the angst potential of maybe, just before Phil speaks and kills the code, the code briefly flickers. And as it flickers, it becomes Chayanne, bleeding and tears in his eyes, reaching out for his father. And Philza has maybe the quickest millisecond of hesitance, a pure moment of human weakness, where he's not the Angel of Death, not a warrior with hardcore skills, but a father.