#okay i’ll just go fuck myself then? | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

abbyshands · 6 months ago

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my brother coming home after months to talk about how repulsive being a lesbian and same sex marriage is is so not where i thought my night was going! 😁

#okay i’ll just go fuck myself then?#you’re gonna have a sister in law whether you like it or not asshole #i’m so!#happy!#lyn speaks ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

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marshmallowcat666 · 5 months ago

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I’m currently hyperfixated rereading Ftfo and can barely do any drawing but I’m trying!!! ‘^’ Designs are easier to draw for some reason so might see only those for a bit T-T

anyways have my version of Lord Lunar’s Gemini! They get fun new outfits!!!

#my artwork #fnaf #tsams #tsams au #tsams Lord lunar au #tsams castor #tsams pollux #tsams gemini #laes castor #laes pollux #laes gemini #the lunar and earth show #tlaes au #tlaes #little rant incoming #feel free to ignore #bro I’m recognizing the difference between a fun interest and a hyperfication and it’s not fun #I really wanna finish rereading ftfo but i keep having to force myself to be like ‘Take a break #go draw and such’ ect #because I’m just not moving for such long periods of time and I physically have to force my brain to stop skipping lines because I genuinely #can’t focus #and #if I stop for too long I’m so worried I’ll lose interest #want to finish ftfo but hyperfication is so bad #T-T #anyways #drink some fucking water #y’all #(don’t worry to much about me btw I’m doing okay and still taking care of myself just a lil frustrated)#(oh and ftfo is an undertale fanfic btw For the Forgotten Ones by I’m_Sorry_Buddy on Ao3 it’s freaking awesome)

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dykelectric · 7 days ago

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I’m sick of spending these lonely nights training myself not to care ✅

Got to be some more change in my life ✅

It’s up to me now turn on the bright lights ✅

#perfect song for when youre 17 and about to go insane but youre moving out in 6 months so its okay #scratch that Perfect ALBUM #and for when u have like two irl friends who actually care about you sorry and u just want to gtfo #GOT TO BE SOME MORE CHANGE IN MY LIFE FOR FUCKING REAL #less than 4 months til i’m 18 guys i can do this. trust #i keep telling myself it’s ok i just have to make it to summer and then im free im free im free ill just get a summer job and then move up #north for uni and i’ll be fine.#Ok sorry having a rough evening #talk

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menacewithawolfcut · 4 days ago

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i think fortiche production studio wants me dead

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bilestat · 7 months ago

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insane how quickly something small can tank my mood

#i am so tired of being cut off when i’m talking #esp when someone doesn’t even care enough to realize i was over halfway through a sentence #and doesn’t ask what i was saying #or when they just make it incredibly obvious they weren’t paying attention or outright don’t care what i’m talking about #even when i’m talking super excitedly #it makes me feel so fucking small and unimportant #like yeah i guess the shit i say doesn’t matter 99% of the time but it matters to ME #but it hurts so bad when i get cut off only for someone else to say stuff entirely unrelated #and to then just like. stream of consciousness ramble every thought that enters their head #like okay. cool. awesome. alright #my mom does that all the time i’ll be telling her something and then i’ll get cut off or she’ll wait til i’m done #to out of nowhere start telling me super in depth life histories of people she hasn’t seen since she was a child. or people i don’t know.#and it’ll always be so in depth about so many people idk OR so fucking vague i get confused as hell #in the typical boomer just needs to talk at someone or hear their own voice way (sorry ily mom)#and i know i can go on for ages about fandom shit that confuses her or she doesn’t know about but #idk. i do not have much else in my life right now. and i only have her and my sibling and very very few friends that aren’t online #and even irl friends i only see a couple times a year each if i’m lucky #i just hate my life lol and i need to stop before i spiral #i have already gone on long enough and will be embarrassed when i come back to delete this because honestly who gives a shit #i need to get over myself #to be deleted #personal

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cherrysnax · 3 days ago

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this is very inconvenient I’m sorry 😭 I need to get my phone fixed but I’m so broke lmao

#I saw some of the message o just got and I am okay #the crash was sooo far away from me #but I did find out that the bus I usually take alongside my gf and little brother crashed earlier today #and like #its a little scary but I’m okay #but yeah this sucks because I have over like 300 messages from ppl trying to get me to rb their posts and if I can see their full blog names #I’ll go and find the blog myself #but my phone is fucked #so even that isn’t always an option #I promise no matter what thag I am not ignoring you

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banghwa-moved · 1 year ago

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genuine question how do u get over ur fear of existing

#i haven’t been able to rly let myself enjoy my new job without stressing about whether it’s enough #and i know it is because other people work here with the same paycheck and live alone and happy #but i cant let myself believe that like. i’ll ever be okay on my own #i think ive been rly conditioned to think i’ll fail no matter what even though i know i wont #like i’m fucking smart im competent i have proved it i can live on my own i AM independent #but literally this house is a jail cell it gets to a point where i don’t even notice the days go by #i have never felt like a real person until i moved out for those few months and that was so scary #like. how do i get over that fear of screwing my life over and just fucking go out and live #dl

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angelstrawbabie420 · 6 months ago

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#im so fucked. im so so fucked #i just woke up slightly hungover and took a shot #very bad development in the alcohol dependency department #and im trying to be like whatever hair of the dog common occurrence. however ik it’s way more serious than that #i fucking hate being sober to the point it’s going to ruin my life #but drinking is such a huge reprieve from the bullshit that i can barely care #im so fucked. lmao #ik i cld just ask my brother to stop buying it or keeping liquor around but i cannot bring myself to give it up #it’s always i’ll think about it tmrw. i’ll deal with it tmrw. but tmrw never comes #why can’t i just be fucking normal why can’t i just be happy without being under the influence of Something. hell not even happy why can’t #i just be content.#ive always been like this. i still remember my first drink and i remember the first time i drank to escape and i havent gotten away from it #since #idk how to. i think itll always just be like this til i die. i dont think im capable of not being this #i dont think i was capable of ever being. a person. to be begin with #i get this awful feeling i shouldve never existed in this form #and i’ll do anything to just feel okay. to feel relatively normal. hence why im here #fucking whatever my life is so worthless anyway may as well just drink myself to death honestly

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nonsensechemicals · 28 days ago

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covert npd is awesome and i want to live and i’m going to listen to song about pirates

#the crier #forgot the tag. sorry. please block that if you’re not comfortable with this #i’m sorry i’ll draw something soon later i promise i’m sorry #i can’t even rethink my life choices because honestly i would’ve found some other thing to absolutely wreck myself over and it’d basically #be the same thing. i don’t want to just. rot or something anymore. i do not want rest. i do not want a break and to come back when i feel #better. i want to stop feeling entirely. i want to be nothing again and not in worth but in how i exist. i do not want to exist anymore #it doesn’t even feel like they hate me. it’s just that everything i did was nothing. i hate that it was nothing. i hate that i loved so muc #and it was nothing. that was everything i was. what else do i have but what i made. it’s everything to me and nothing to everyone #they are everything to me and to everyone they are just ‘okay’. you won’t talk about it again. you won’t think of it again #if my creations could feel they would not care so why do i have to. i want to say it’s the creations that make me happy but its the attenti #ion. i don’t know. i don’t want to rely on it. seeing them makes me happy but it’s nothing anymore once i realize nobody cares but me #this isn’t even a real fucking issue. i’m fine realistically i should be good as long as i don’t make another issue for myself #i just don’t know though. the issue is me and well by extending my life i am basically harming everyone else. maybe my creations deserve #to be looked over because they are helping something that shouldn’t be here exist. i wish i didn’t exist. i hate myself i don’t know #it’s just. i’m worthless. i have no real reason to be here other than to annoy people. if people don’t love what i made then i will have to #face that my existence isn’t worth anything. i won’t HAVE to live anymore. and i want to live but at the same time if i don’t have to be #here then why should i fight against myself? i don’t even know what i would say i don’t want to entertain the possibility so i keep fightin #i just want to live i want to live so fucking bad and i can only live if they exist and if you see them too #a real death would mean nothing to me but i’m dead the second anyone looks away and i’m scared andi’m sweating and i hate this an #i’m going to bed now #idk i just want to add if someone’s reading this i’m never insincere when i compliment something that’s better than me. it’s better than wh #at i did that’s why i’m complimenting it. it’s just i wish that i was as good too

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alxor-of-hellsite · 1 month ago

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THINGS!

2025 is going to be the most jam packed stressful year of my life & i know that for sure because a lot is already planned. So i WILL be an absolute mental wreck (this is apologies in advance) & i will literally be clinging onto support most likely the whole year so tumblr will either be me spamming constantly or me not here for weeks or months at a time & barely posting? i’m so unpredictable. Anyways my entire life is guaranteed to change & the best case scenario will still ruin a lot of shit for me so if i get really depressed THERE IS REASON!!!! & i’ve already made several promises so the world is stuck with me if i can help it. so uuhhhhhhhhh YEAH. ANYWAYS IM SCARED FUCKING SHITLESS LIKE ZERO SHIT SCARED OUT KF MY FUCKING MIND SO YEAH. THE MENTAL STATE WONT BE THE BEST. LOVE YOU GUYS!!! IF MY ACTIVITY IS SPOTTY IM NOT DEAD WE’RE PROBABLY JUST DISSOCIATED AS SHIT!

Anyways. TLDR i’m going to be super fucking stressed out & out of pocket for the next year because of shit.

Any friends of ours read tags pretty please <3

#new year 2025 #going to be super hyperactive or stare at a wall for a week & i don’t know which one it will be yet it’s leaning towards stare at a wall #for maybe like a month. just stare at wall & cry #BUDDY REN IS NOT OKAY! BUT HANGING IN THERE!#WE COMMITTED TO HARD TO THE BIT THAT IS LIFE SO YALL ARE STUCK WITH ME LESS SUN DONT SHINE RIVERS TAKE ME DOWN!#mighhhhhht end up relapsing on the addiction but that is way better than being dead. it doesn’t have to be healthy at this point #as long as it keeps me alive & sane i guess? i’ll obviously try not to but like dark times are dark #life update #IF YOU ARE AN IRL THAT I TALK TO OFTEN & YOU NOTICE ME NOT RESPONDING TO ANYTHING OR REACHING OUT PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD REACH OUT #IM SAYING THIS NOW BECAUSE IVE BEEN INCREDIBLY SUICIDAL BEFORE & AM BEING CAUTIOUS AS HELL!!!! MENTAL STATE IS NOT A FUCKING GAME OVER HERE #LIKE IF I START SHOWING SIGNS & I AM NOT TAKING CARE OF IT ALREADY REN IS A STUBBORN BITCH & WILL REFUSE HELP BUT IM NOT PLAYING #IF SHIT STARTS GETTING CONCERNING FOR THE LOVE OF GOD PLEASE INTERVENE #LIKE OBVIOUSLY IF YOU ARENT DOING GOOD EITHER & NEED PRIORITIZE YOURSELF DO THAT!!!#BUT IF YOU ARE IN A POSITION TO HELP & CATCH ON TO ANY CONCERNING SIGNS PLEASSSSSSE DONT LET THIS BITCH TURN HELP DOWN & INTERVENE #WE WILL PROBABLY NEED ALL THE HELP WE CAN GET & ALL THE SUPPORT WE CAN ASWELL #BUT ALSO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF PLEASEEEE? DONT IGNORE YOUR OWN NEEDS #APOLOGIES IF THIS IS WORDED BAD IM NOT THE BEST WRITER THATS NOT MY JOB #SERIOUSLY LOVE YOU GUYS & IM GOING TO TRY MY HARDEST TO SUPPORT MYSELF BUT WE MIGHT NEED MORE HELP THAN WE CAN GIVE OURSELVES ALONE?#IF ANY OF THIS SHIT MAKES SENSE #MIGHT NOT? I DUNNO DM ME IF YOU WANT TO BATTLE PLAN WITH ME #THE BATTLE BEING LIFE WHILE CHANGING LITERALLY EVERYTHING & MAYBE BEING AN INTERNALLY DISPLACED REFUGEE IN THE COMING MONTHS #I LOVE YALL! UH THANKS FOR READING I GUESS? IM TIRED & GONNA SLEEP NOW #GOOD NIGHT YALL <3

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hershelwidget · 1 year ago

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Actually now I think about it. We’re barely scratched the SURFACE that is my Big Brained Thoughts About Radio Star. so to fix that here’s me throwing damn near all the drawings I never showed y’all. go bonkers. also im not going to explain a SINGLE ONE OF THESE you have to find any possible context in the tags im so sorry