#none of these quotes were altered

[ad-astra-per-aspera-1389]

MCU characters as Phineas and Ferb quotes:

Peter Q: Space is cold and unforgiving...like my father!

Peter P: Huh. That parkour training actually paid off!

Peggy: Cute doesn't win the war, kid.

Rocket: Zzzzzz... But, your honor, how could I have robbed that bank if I was already wearing the prison jumpsuit? It just doesn't make any-- *gasps and wakes up* Somehow I want to finish that dream to find out if I'm guilty or not.

Scott: It turns out "entomology" is the study of insects. Go figure.

Bucky: I was sure my arm would grow back, but it never did. *taps his left arm which makes a metallic sound* See? Pure titanium. It's a fact.

Steve: Are we ready to get that "Reckless Disregard for Life and Limb" patch? / An absolute law without hope of appeal? That's despotism!

Tony: Eat your heart out, Howard Hughes.

Howard: The flying car of the future, today, is still pulling a bit to the right.

[audliminal]

Survivability Bias Pt 2

Masterpost - Ao3

Danny spends the next few days exploring the town more, while he considers the implications of everything he’d learned  at the library. He’d taken notes, but they’re not exactly the best. Danny’s never been that good at taking notes, after all, but he has a pretty good memory, so the various key words and few quotes he’d scribbled down are plenty useful in reminding him of all the wild shit he’d read about.

There’d been a lot of history involved in the whole meta situation. It seems like these so-called meta humans, and various other races (species? Danny doesn’t know nearly enough about the cultural implications of that) have been around long enough to have had a significant impact on the world at large. And yet, at the same time, there really hadn’t been a lot of personal information on any of the heroes. Oh, there’d been plenty on some of the villains - and of course there’d still be villains here, he’s not lucky enough to escape that - but aside from various speculation about their romantic lives, and a few acknowledgements of family ties here and there, there’d been very few details about where most of them actually came from.

Superman, for example (he seemed to be this world’s go-to example of metas and superheroes), is listed as being an alien, who’s powers come from his biologies unique interaction with this planet’s atmosphere, although it doesn’t explain anything about what that means. Interestingly, there seems to be almost no speculation about Superman’s so-called secret identity. Only about half the listed heroes seem to have one according to the public, but Danny knows that song and dance too well to fall for it. Honestly, they’re even more likely to have a secret identity than Danny himself, seeing as Danny’s alter ego is literally dead. Not that ghosts seem to be much of a thing here.

He’d felt so silly looking up information about ghosts, right before leaving the library. Compared to the deep dive into recent history, googling “are ghosts real” must have looked insane if anybody could see it. The answer he’d returned had been not unlike the way things had been when he was ten or twelve. Before the portal, you’d see dumb ghost hunter shows where they never actually saw much of anything. Ghosts were, like, poltergeists that moved your furniture around and slammed the doors shut. The results here had been a little more interesting - clearly in a world where superheroes are a fact of life, fantastical stuff is a little more rational, and the speculation was clearly affected by that fact, but it still had been, seemingly, all speculation.

Of course, none of that really mattered when it came to Superman. Danny was at least ninety percent sure he wasn’t a ghost. And even if he somehow was, it didn’t change the fact that he either has a secret identity, or he basically never takes part in society. And if he doesn’t have a secret identity, then the question very much becomes why not. Because that means he either has no real reason to care about anyone here (which seems implausible), or he’s unable to spend that time in public. It’s that possibility that’s knocked out any chance of Danny approaching any of the heroes. Because there’s always the possibility that the endorsed heroes are being used to lure other metahumans in. And Danny doesn’t know nearly enough about this world to make any kind of judgment on what’s most likely here. After all, historically there’s plenty of examples of governments that  work with specific people among targeted groups, in order to more successfully take out the others. it tends not to end well for those people when it’s all over, but anyone who’s short-sighted or even just backed into a wall enough can fall for that.

Hell, the GIW had actually tried that line on Danny once or twice, not that he’d ever accepted. After all, they’d never realized that was actually sort of alive, so their pitches had always been... less than convincing. 

Danny blinks, reaching out to touch the brick wall in front of him. He hadn’t meant to come back here, but honestly at this point, he really shouldn’t be surprised. This random little alley on side street wouldn’t be interesting at all to anyone else. But if Danny stares long enough, he can almost see the green-tinged light of the portal that brought him here. Not that he’d ever seen the portal from this side. He hadn’t turned to look until after the light had faded. The idea of seeing his friends’ faces through the swirling green had been too much.

They had all known exactly what it meant when he came here. The difficulty of the journey was the point. Between the anti-ecto acts gaining not just mainstream awareness, but support, and the GIW gaining access to better funding and training, well, the second the GIW had started successfully ending ghosts, it seemed like all the denizens of the zone had collectively decided to stay the fuck home.

At first Danny had enjoyed it, had relaxed and been excited to finally be able to focus on just being a teen. But the GIW hadn’t calmed down, had just started going even more on the offensive, and the second he and Jazz had noticed agents showing up casually at their house, everyone had gone into full alert.

That’s how they found out that the next goal was to apparently take the fight to the zone itself.

The conclusion had been easy from that point. The portal needed to be destroyed, and fast. But with the ghost zone blocked off (and Danny’s death being the unknowing link that made the portal ever work in the first place), that would leave Danny as one of three remaining targets.

They’d all immediately agreed that Vlad could figure out his own solution. Dani- well, she had been traveling, but the second she turned up, the others had made plans to send her on her own one way portal trip too.

Of course, the likelihood that she’d end up here is probably minuscule. So he’s alone.

“Hey,” a stern voice cuts through Danny’s thoughts. He glances over to the person who’s standing at the door to a building. “There’s no loitering here.”

Right. It’s almost easy to forget, in the face of his life’s inescapable absurdity, that to everyone else in this town, he just seems like a possibly-homeless delinquent. Not that the delinquent part is unfamiliar.

“Sorry,” Danny mutters belatedly, realizing that the person is just waiting as he stares at them like a weirdo. He’s not very good with people anymore. Not that he was that good to begin with. Phantom had been a Ghostly Menace, constantly destroying the town with his fights, nobody had expected him to function as a person. Nobody had thought he was a person. But as Danny Fenton- well, he’d fallen short of just about every expectation set at Danny Fenton’s feet.

Distantly he wonders if his friends even bothered to disguise his disappearance. He’d always kind of wondered if his parents would ever notice if he and Jazz just- left. School definitely noticed, though most of the faculty would probably take it as completely expected. After all Danny Fenton was a terrible student, constantly skipping class and never doing his work, and even when he was in class he was usually halfway to falling asleep anyways. Lancer had certainly lectured him about his lack of discipline more than enough. So they might just come to the conclusion that he’d dropped out and run away.

He doesn’t know if he’d prefer that, honestly. The truth is messed up and complicated and frankly, unbelievable. But maybe if they knew the truth at least one person might feel a fraction of sympathy for all the bullshit that he’d been dealing with. Funny, Danny thinks, how coming here feels more like a death than when I actually died.

[gemmahale]

Okay, I'm home, I've been on the road for the better part of 4 hours today due to a miscommunication and a cancelled event, and I've had this rant brewing.

Being Anti-Military and Pro-Veteran are stances that can mutually exist.

Games like CoD and whatever other FPS/Military Simulation game is out there is propaganda. It’s meant to make you want to sign up or support military action.

The military (I’m speaking specifically to the US, as I am most familiar with them by proxy) uses some incredibly underhanded techniques to ensure they have the warm bodies soldiers they need to keep the system working as intended.

This includes but is not limited to: promises of paying for education, aspirations of “seeing the world”, provision of job security, access to healthcare, a stable job and housing, etc. They use things like “patriotism” and “glory” and “security” to lure people in.

And then, when that person is wholly and completely reliant on the military - for a paycheck, housing, healthcare, you name it - they spit them back out into the world with a "thanks a lot and good fucking luck."

Into a world where:

Financial support for care has been axed and axed and axed again under "budget cuts"

Care is secured with red tape so thick you can tightrope walk across it

Care is denied for things the military caused (by saying "it didn't happen while you were serving".) *Yes, that's a direct quote from a doctor to one of Kallen's peers. When assessing a life-altering injury sustained while they were in country overseas, it was deemed as "non-service related injury”.

In comparison to civilians:

Veterans are ~40% more likely to be homeless.

Veterans are ~80% more likely to suffer from untreated mental and physical health issues - PTSD, hearing loss, nerve damage, etc.

Veterans are ~60% more likely to turn to addictive substances - alcohol, drugs, etc.

Veterans are ~70% more likely to commit suicide.

This isn’t limited to combat vets. Logistics specialists, administrative specialists, IT specialists all get screwed when they leave.

Ask just about any veteran that has served, they are incredibly likely to be staunchly anti-military.

The military causes a tremendous amount of damage to every person involved, even if they aren't aware of it at the time.

It’s a cult, it’s an abusive relationship, it’s predatory. Treat it as such.

Support veterans, advocate for their care. They made choices you may not agree with, but they made them because of what they thought the military was offering to them. Many thought they were doing the right thing for their country - that was the lie they were fed from 9/11 on (in the US). Then they were chewed up, spit out, and left for dead by the same people that made all those promises to them.

Here are some US-based, apolitical Veteran Support groups (many have International chapters/members):

22 Until None - 501-C3 that provides support to veterans by veterans. There are local chapters on Facebook that are all active and are listed on the website

Disabled American Veteran - Veteran help association; involved in legislation and local assistance, connections to VA advocates to help navigate the VA

Wounded Warrior Project - 501-C3 charity supporting disabled veterans.

Note: I am absolutely not doing the "not all servicemembers" thing here. I'm saying "veterans are living with their choices, and still deserve access to care."

[adventuresofalgy]

Algy woke very early on his 13th birthday, for he was much too excited to sleep any longer. It was astonishing to think that so much time had passed since he had started his adventures on tumblr one cool March day, back in 2012… Algy could hardly believe that that was thirteen yearss ago!

Fluttering around the garden drowsily in the dim morning light, he was thrilled to discover that the post bird had left him a wonderful collection of presents and cards beneath the daffodils, and as he started to investigate them, Algy remembered a poem which he had quoted five years ago on his eighth birthday…

She woke before the sun. She heard the still Small sounds which whisper when the night is gone. Though all the curtains of her room were drawn, She saw the gray light creep across the sill. This was her day. How would it help fulfill Her destiny? She looked out at the dawn Stepping across the velvet of the lawn, She saw the purple of a distant hill. In cloak and slippers, she glided through the halls Softly – she would disturb none still asleep – Then looked through maple branches to the sky; Her small heart beating against its delicate walls, The marvel of thirteen years too much to keep. “What is this lovely world, and who am I?”

[Algy has taken the liberty of slightly altering this poem Tenth Birthday by the 20th century American poet Marjorie Knapp.]

[reality-detective]

The Secret Vatican Gold Vault?

"The Vatican's treasure of solid gold has been estimated by the United Nations World Magazine to amount to several billion dollars. A large bulk of this is stored in gold ingots with the U.S. Federal Reserve Bank, while banks in England and Switzerland hold the rest. "But this is just a small portion of the wealth of the Vatican, which in the U.S. alone, is greater than that of the five wealthiest giant." End quote.

This was reported by Henry Mackow. There were reportedly that an international military force that repatriated 650 plane loads of gold and cash from the Vatican to the US Treasury.

A tunnel between Vatican City and Jerusalem was discovered containing gold. The amount of gold found is “more gold than you can imagine” stacked 13 levels high for the first 150 miles (241 kilometers) of the tunnel and “650 planes used to transport the gold”.

The result of this operation was the closure of over 6,000 Vatican bank accounts used for illegal activities. I do not have any conclusive info on that but there was an interesting report that came out from the Vatican itself.

In a report from 👇

They published a Congressional inquiry into the auditing of the Fort Knox gold, and they were informed by the officials responsible for that gold, that the gold in Fort Knox and other depositries in the USA (261 million ounces) is now part of the gold reserve of the International Monetary Fund (the IMF).

We have been informed by one of the top lawyers employed by the IMF (eventually sacked because she intended to whistleblow on them), that the IMF was controlled by the Vatican and the Jesuits. Who is this person you may ask? Karen Hudes. Who has exposed over the years how the IMF worked.

Of course alot has changed since she came out publicly. K. Hudes has some stand out points she has made regarding info that you all have seen on this channel.

For instance: 👇

Hudes asserts that a clandestine version of the U.S. Constitution, enacted in 1871, handed over significant control to private bankers, significantly altering the original governance framework. Which is true.

Also according to her, individuals in court are seen as debtors rather than citizens, which of course is another term of enslavement which effectively dehumanizes us and classifies us as property of the Federal Government, so on and so forth. Something none of us should be surprised to hear.

There's a lot to look into regarding this subject. So take your time and understand that many things have changed that will come to fruition in full force over the coming months. We are no longer under the 1871 Corp Act. Which is why the Chevron Doctrine had to be overturned. 🤔

[kaivenom]

My favourite book came to life?

Summary: you went with your brother's to solve a case but when you get there you start to realize similarities with the murders and witnesses with your favourite book.

Pairing: Gabriel x Winchester!reader

Warnings: none, murder scenes? but not explicit written

Masterlist

Finally the ride ended, you loved your brothers but being on a car with them for eight hours was suffocating sometimes. You closed your favourite book, the ride let you read it once again.

You checked in on the motel and create your covers, this time you were a FBI rookie again, you are always the rookie because you are the younger.

You three spent all the morning asking witnesses and seeing the murder scenarios. Something about the settings was strange, more strange than a creature killing people , this procedure sounds familiar to you somehow.

---------------------------------------

Two days passed since you got on the town and two new murders occured. Officially the assasin it's someonw who read your favourite book.

"I tell you guys, maybe it's a normal serial killer who it's a nerd for this book."

"I think we should be here one more day to check the theory."

That afternoon you visited the new witness, she opened the door dressed like a character from the book and refused to be called by her real name.

"Officially it's a monster, she is completely brain-washed."

"How can we talk to her? Use your book knowledge."

After one hour you convinced her to speak to you about it, you told her you were the inspector from the book and she started to open up.

You said goodbye to the woman and left the house, before getting into the impala, your Dean picked some candy wrapping from the floor.

"Son of a bitch."

"It's the trickster."

"Who?" you repplied confused.

"It's someone we dealed with twice, he is a total pain in the ass," by his faced you could see that he is, "he can alter the reality and change his appareance, all of this it's his game."

"Maybe the only way to get out it's follow it, back there i was the inspectorfrom the book, and this morning the witnesses weren't brain washed, his game its escalating, we need to adapt."

"And for what porpuse?"

"Reveal the mistery and capture the assain." you said quoting the protagonist of the novel."

------------------

Your strategy worked, you advanced a lot on the case, you almost got him. It was raining outside but you needed to clear your mind, just like the inspector you think, so you got outside and leaning against the motel wall under a shelter from the rain.

You noticed someone with a coat and a black umbrella, just like the final witness of the book, the one who gives the final hint to get the killer.

He got to your side and hand you a letter, you couldn't recognize his face from the town but that doesn't matter. You run to your brothers to give them the information. The chart talked about the police officer and his name, just like the book.

You three went fast to the police man's house to get him in hopes that the game ends and find the trickster. The man was in fact in his house and you arrested him because he was human but no trace of the supernatural one.

"So, we were wrong?" Dean was starting to get frustated.

"No, the trickster it's on town, how else can the victims have that personalities..." while they continue to argue you realized somethin.

"Shut up, i think the letter it's an anagram."

Half and hour and you were going to the location on the chart, a storage outside the village. When you entered you found the man who gave you letter.

"It was you, you killed those people," you are not able to hide the rage of having been fooled by that man, creature.

"I didn't kill them, the officer killed them and i didn't care but then i read this book," he showed to you like it was a comercial, "and thought about taking the opportunity to try some new ideas."

"Disgusting."

"I made it obvious for your brothers to come but i didn't thought about you gorgeous," he started to get close to you, "how are you related to them?"

"Hey, relax with our sister, mate."

"But at first they where just settings, later they started to be characters, why?" you asked, trying to ignore your brothers's attack of protectivity.

"Because i saw you and i was intrigued. You read the book and you found the similiarities but you needed a little hint, i supposed you would love a litte roleplay."

"I like it, not the killing humans part but the yes."

"Are you guys really flirting at this moment?"

"Perhaps we can meet again some other time."

"If there are no murders yet."

"I will have that on mind." he smiled playfully and blew you a kiss from the air before snapping his fingers and dissapearing.

"Son of a bitch, he escaped again, if you weren't flirting with him..."Dean almost screamed at your ear.

"Sorry okay? i didn't know he can do that, you should thell me more about him the next time."

"Oh no, we are not going to talk about him, we don't want you to date him, seeing how you two were right there."

Sam only laughed a little behind you and you three made your way to the impala. When you sat on the backseat and oppened your book, there was a paper with some numbers, a phone number. Smart and pretty Trickster.

[bad-system]

alliances — let's talk KCD3

disclaimer: this post is a continuation of my previous KCD3 post on speculation of the events and lore that i'd like to see explored in the next installment(s) of the KCD story. and as per my last post; these are only speculations born of my own biased narrative and hopeful bastardizations of real events and what i personally would like to see explored in the next installment(s). this is not representative of ALL the real historical persons and events as there is either info missing on them, they were altered by WH for the sake of the game or i'm plain wrong. PS: i am not a historian. i just like history.

PART: 1 2 3 4 5

_____________________

alliances

in my previous post i laid down the barest of bones of the possible direction the story of KCD3 & 4 might move towards as well as established a very basic groundwork for the appearance of real life historical czech figures who played significant roles in the insurgence of pro-hussite views up to the point of the emergence of actual hussites around 1419.

in this post, however, i'd like to focus on the circumstances that might've driven henry and hans apart, the why's and when's, and how they ended up on opposite sides. i will support these with my own interpretations of certain KCD1 & 2 dialogues and events.

along with the smaller scale of things, i'd like to keep to the earlier timelines of generally 1405. — 1411., and focus mainly on henry's formative realizations and radicalization among the lower nobility, followers of jan hus and jan žižka.*

alliances — henry

the reason i want to focus on that particular rabble are some of the characters from KCD1 & 2; most prominently father godwin, olda of semine and miller kreyzl, who were all written as holders of pro-hussite views even at this stage of the game (story), and even foreshadowed participation in the hussite wars.

the same goes for radzig kobyla, but i didn't want to include him here like the rest because his pro-hussite and anti-sigismund sentiments will become much more prominent in the following years (1404. — 1410.), in the service of king wenceslaus iv himself along with jan žižka, jan sokol of lamberg and matěj vůdce. so while i do believe his views would greatly impact henry's own, KCD1&2 did not explicitly depict him engaging with henry in a way that actively promoted these beliefs (yet), so i did not have any interactions of the sort that i could list under here like the rest.

however, it is worth noting that radzig kobyla was already a high priority target since KCD1 in 1403. when sir markvart of aulitz names him as a conspirator against the crown during their parley at talmberg. so, we know that whatever he had been involved in before the events of KCD1, it’s clear that he had already been stirring the pot.

___

the first person we encounter with passionate sympathies towards jan hus' teachings is none other than godwin, as early as KCD1. it is during the quest "mysterious ways" that he talks to henry in a tavern about hus' teachings- loudly and full of conviction. you, as henry, can even choose to say this about the church before godwin starts talking about hus;

(henry expresses some pretty strong sentiments about the church that sound surprisingly close to early hussite views, despite henry’s supposed unfamiliarity with hus’ teachings.)

+ some of godwin's own words;

(he goes on for a while about corrupt clergy; he even directly quotes some of jan hus' words)

in KCD2, there's miller kreyzl.

towards the ending of his quests, before the black powder experiment, he talks to henry about going to university in prague and being fed dogmatic drivel and choosing to leave because of it. this is most likely where kreyzl encountered anti-church views with wycliffe's teachings gaining infamy. jan hus would go on to preach wycliffe's teachings as early as 1399. in prague university.

(kreyzl, KCD2)

not only that, but some of the things he says to henry sound very deliberate;

(also, žižka himself mentions kreyzl in passing in nebakov to henry; very possible that kreyzl would go on to become a supplier of black powder for žižka.)

and finally; olda semine.

(i'm sure this is a throw-away line that will not become relevant later. surely. definitely don't think about a certain ptaček saying this.)

not only a prominently anti-sigismund fighter, but also a very determined one. the conversation he has with henry in the raid on semine also sounded very... interesting to me.

and what's this? well, if i said "i connected the dots" and you didn't immediately reply with "you didn't connect shit" then i offer you a very tentative theory. olda here is talking about pro-sigismund traitors he considers enemies of king wenceslaus iv. and curiously, among them he names the kunstadts. sounds familar? you're probably thinking "wait, like jitka of kunstadt?"

well; yes and no.

i do believe he is refering to jitka's kunstadts but this wouldn't make much sense as the real boček II of kunštát was pro-wenceslaus and pro-hussite until death. but also, the KCD2 botschek seems to be a fictional character in a sense that he is a composite of two character by the same name; but neither of them anti-wenceslaus.

could it be a hint for future? could it have been a mistake (unlikely)? was it a deliberate rewrite of history? will this botschek be a different character? unsure, but definitely noting for future.

which brings me to the next section;

alliances - hans capon

it seems like my ideas for the possible reasons that caused hans to side with the pro-sigismund neighbouring sternbergs (šternberk) are evolving with each day. i learn more with every historical article and source i read so this is still a developing theory, but i'd like to present you with my speculations either way; hanush of leipa!

it is noted in hanush's codex entry that he later fell out of favour with wenceslaus iv because of his robbery and banditry exploits. that and that he later married markéta of šternberk (sternberg).**

could it have been possible that hans' uncle hanush, who fell out of favour with wenceslaus and married into sternbergs, had some sway in convincing hans of where to lay down his allegiances? politics for the sake of practicality rather than moral considerations?

if i had to write a plausible reason, this is what i'd do. just saying.

(however; markéta of šternberk's date of death is listed as 1365. which can mean two things- WH took the creative liberty of altering the timeline a bit or the wikipedia source is wrong.**more details on this in the next post.)

_____________________

*i will be addressing the contents of this paragraph in the next post as it would've been too long for this one. it will heavily feature henry's personal views and motivations arisen from interacting with the quickly spiralling world of bohemia across the next couple years as well as the people closest to him taking more definitive sides on what is quickly becoming henry's own war as well.

this will feature godwin, radzig, žižka, jan II of lichstenstein and if the post doesn't end up too long, i'll add my thoughts on jan sokol of lamberg and matěj vůdce.

[svngof-inks]

𝐒𝐖𝐄𝐀𝐑 𝐈𝐓.

Pairing: Daemon Targaryen x Reader

Prior to the Dance of the Dragon, the vow between Daemon and his paramour lingered without knowing if it will last.

Inspired by the Song of Achilles, Patrochilles. Credit to Madeline Miller for the quote.

fanfiction | House of the Dragon

When Rhaenyra had received the tidings of Lucerys' demise, she crumpled at her place, unable to rein in her sorrow. The passing of her offspring, now her cherished child that she held so close to her heart. All hastened to her side, tending to her as she sought solace in her chamber.

The remnants of the young boy and his dragon washed ashore on Dragonstone.

Dread seized you as you bathed in the balmy waters. You chewed at your lower lip, grappling with the impending storm that loomed over all. None shall emerge unscathed. The dragons shall clash and waltz until one prevails and the other succumbs.

The downfall of the dragons was imminent.

Lost in reverie, you failed to perceive the door creaking open, heralding the entrance of the man. Only when his hand alighted on your shoulder did you startle with a soft gasp.

"'It is me, my love." His rich voice banished the tumultuous thoughts. You lifted your gaze to meet his, discerning the unease mirrored in his eyes; he too foresaw the looming conflict.

A hush fell upon you both as you reclined against his embrace, swallowing the lump formed in your throat. You prayed that neither of you shall meet a grim fate. The throne could fall to the Greens, yet your sole concern was your beloved.

Daemon tenderly kissed your temple. "You are tense," he observed, caressing your shoulder blade. "Tell me your worries." A gentle plea. He had never been unkind to you. Never.

You spoke, "Daemon, war is on the coming. Lucerys shall be avenged one way or another, and I dread it shall claim us both." The chamber was filled with a hushed breeze, engulfing the palpable tension and fear that gripped you so tightly. The water now felt icy to the touch, unlike its previous warmth, unlike his touch.

The Prince remained silent, pressing another kiss on your temple. After a pause, he murmured, "In the end, we all meet our demise, my love. Such fears need not consume you. War was inevitable when that drunk cunt of a king seized Rhaenyra's throne in our absence." Yet his words failed to offer solace as intended.

Turning towards him, you twisted your body to face his. Tears once concealed now brimmed in your eyes as you clasped his hands. "I care not for the Greens or the throne. Death does not faze me. It is our parting that I dread. I cannot bear to be parted from you, plagued daily by fear for our safety." Your words were a soft whisper, tinged with regret at the tremor in your voice. How could you rein in your emotions when his life hung by a thread much like yours?

The Prince knelt closer, his eyes reflecting a love unmatched. "The gods are cruel. They shall never grant you lasting joy and triumph."

Drawing nearer, relishing his words, you leaned into his gaze.

"I'll tell you a secret" he raised your chin, locking eyes with you. "I shall be the first." Boldness shimmered in his gaze, deepening your affection for him. "Swear it."

"Why me?"

"You are the reason. Swear it."

Enveloped in fervent love and unwavering devotion to him, you uttered a vow that would alter your lives forever. "I swear it."

A grin played upon his lips.

"I feel like I could eat the world raw."

[astrronomemes]

HOME ALONE (1990): STARTERS

a collection of quotes, phrases, and sayings from the 1990 film, Home Alone. change & alter as needed.

"Did I burn down the joint? I don't think so."

"What am I supposed to do? Shake his hand and say, congratulations, you're an idiot?"

"You're what the French call le incompetent."

"This house is so full of people. It makes me sick."

"I wouldn't let you sleep in my room if you were growing on my ass."

"Maybe he's just trying to be nice."

"There are fifteen people in this house, and you're the only one who has to make trouble."

"Maybe you should ask Santa for a new family."

"I wish they would all just disappear."

"How fast does this thing go? Does it have automatic transmission?"

"You be positive. I'll be realistic."

"I made my family disappear."

"[Name], I'm going to feed you to my tarantula."

"If it makes you feel any better, I forgot my reading glasses."

"What's wrong with you? Why do you do that? I told you not to do that."

"You're sick, you know? You're really sick."

"You're not at all worried about [name]?"

"Look, I've been awake for almost sixty hours straight. I'm tired and I'm dirty. I've been from Chicago to Paris, to Dallas, to... where the hell am I?"

"Now that I'm this close, you're telling me it's hopeless?"

"I think we're getting scammed by a kindergartner."

"You're afraid of the dark, too, [name]. You know you are."

"What's next? Rabies shots for the Easter Bunny?"

"Instead of presents this year, I just want my family back. No toys."

"There's a lot of things going around about me, but none of it is true."

"Well, this is the place to be if you're feeling bad about yourself."

"I really like my family, even though sometimes I say I don't. Sometimes, I even think I don't. Do you get that?"

"Deep down, you'll always love them. But you can forget that you love them. You can hurt them, and they can hurt you."

"You can be a little old for a lot of things. You're never too old to be afraid."

"Bless this highly nutritious, microwavable, macaroni and cheese dinner, and the people who sold it on sale. Amen."

"Why the hell are you dressed like a chicken?!"

"Maybe we shouldn't talk about this."

"It's pretty cool that you didn't burn the place down."

[lets-try-some-writing]

Random question, but how good do you think the ‘Bots and ‘Cons would be at cooking? Does the Matrix happen to have any tips or knowledge of the culinary arts? Would the kids be of any assistance to the ‘Bots, or would they also fail at cooking? For some reason I think Miko would be really bad at making anything with more than 5 steps but make a really good grilled cheese sandwich. You think they would fare any better at baking?

Heck yeah this is funny.

━━━━━━ ⊙ ❖ ⊙ ━━━━━━━━━━━━ ⊙ ❖ ⊙

Cooking on Earth

As a general rule, cooking is not really a thing on Cybertron, at least not as it is on Earth. The process of creating energon based fuels and treats is more of a purification than any real chemical bonding or serious alteration as commonly seen in human culinary works. As such, when the team brought the children under their care and were then hit with the realization that they needed to fuel their small wards, issues arose immediately.

Arcee could hardly process normal energon, much less cook anything to save her life. The only human food she is capable of putting together is boxed macaroni and cheese. Even then, it still isn't all that good. She either adds too much butter or none at all. Her milk additions make dish look more like cereal than anything else and quite frankly she somehow manages to burn the noodles despite that fact that it should be nearly impossible. The children don't like her attempts at cooking, but if pressed, they will consume her noodle dish. She has attempted baking but has only succeeded in burning the wall in an attempt to quote "make sure the cake was fully baked".

She is not allowed in the kitchen alone. Ever.

Bulkhead has been met with limited success in all things gelatin. He can't make much else unless he is putting sauce on pre-ordered food, but gelatin he can do. On Cybertron he was known amongst the Wreckers for his banger jellied energon, even earning minor praise from Ultra Magnus. Thankfully for everyone, the same general concept applies to human jellied treats, and so Bulkhead is able to make gelatin without killing anyone. Of course his flavor profiles are rather... off. He has no clue what actually is constituted as good food for including in gelatin, but he tries his best.

Smokescreen and Bumblebee can make a mean grilled cheese, but only if they are working together. One must have their optics on the food while the other plays music in the background while grating cheese. If either of them get distracted or only one is present, the results are wild and worthy of a fire extinguisher. Bee has attempted soup before, and surprisingly, once in a blue moon he can make a really good potato soup. It is close enough to preparing energon rations that he can manage it occasionally. Smokescreen though? He has been given a lifetime ban from the stove. He somehow manages to make a really good salad despite that. It is largely just him throwing random green things in the fridge into a bowl, but it works generally.

Ratchet does not cook. Optimus has forbidden him to cook despite the Doctor wishing to figure out the strange science. The only time he tried cooking, he made actual poison and almost fed it to the kids thinking it was a nutrient dense supplement. Since then he has been confined to the realms of baking, which thankfully, is not too foreign since he can and has made spectacular energon goodies in the past. He knows how to work heat related tools well enough to make really good cupcakes. He can't do frosting though. Its always chunky or pure liquid sugar. Miko still eats them, even if they are a little burned sometimes.

Ultra Magnus can cook, on both Cybertron AND Earth. He just refuses to do so. Period.

Optimus for his part, despite his knowledge, can cook in theory. He knows how it should work, and so largely depending on the resources given to him and his level of focus, he can make a mean dish on Cybertron and Earth. His specialty on both worlds is a variant of shepherds pie, something he lived and vented back on Cybertron due to how cheap it was at the local restaurant. Of course the names of the dishes and the ingredients differ, but the concept remains the same. And so as long as the dish requires no decorum, Optimus can make it fairly well. However if asked to bake, the Prime physically cannot. The singular time he made the attempt, he came away covered in soot and with a lifetime ban from the baking items.

When it comes to the Decepticons, Megatron does not cook, period. On Cybertron he was a fantastic brewer of high grade, but that skill does not translate over well. On the Nemesis, he has a small personal brewing station where he will occasionally whip something up for himself. But that is a rare treat. He has taken the time to study human brewing methods though, largely out of a desire to mock their efforts. This of course led to some experimentation on his end, which in turn resulted in better high grade than what he was capable of producing before. He will never admit where the jump in skill came from.

Knockout and Breakdown love to make cake specifically. They can't even eat the stuff, but they like seeing how big and how grand they can make it. Hours are spent dutifully baking cakes to perfection, molding them, and then decorating them. Usually its done after Cybertronian sites, but off an on they will make human tourist locations out of cake. Breakdown also experiments with chocolate and has become relatively good at making realistic chocolate molds. These, along with Knockout's cakes, he takes to different places around the globe to donate. He may not be fond of humans, but waste is not acceptable.

Starscream is by far the best chef out of all present Cybertronians, and that is only because he fragging hates that Gordan Ramsey is better than he is at it. Starscream has devoted a ridiculous amount of time to cooking JUST so that he can curse right back at the human chef and prove himself superior. No, he does not know where it stemmed from. No, he cannot even eat what he makes. But frag it all he will get that beef wellington right or he will die trying. However against all expectation considering his considerable cooking ability on Earth, he can't cook on Cybertron to save his life. He never needed to, so he never learned.

Shockwave doesn't cook. He makes purified energon and that is all. He doesn't even bother learning anything else. Why would he? Its not like he can taste or appreciate anything complicated. Arachnid does not cook either, and that is largely because she sees it as beneath her. Soundwave is in a similar boat and does not bother... unless it comes to making cat treats. Those he will go through the pain of working with tiny human tools to manage in order to lure in the furry creatures.

Dreadwing can only make noodles. And only from the box. He has no explanation.

[creature-wizard]

Where most of this stuff about programmed alters really comes from...

This stuff going around about highly specialized forms of DID alter programming (such as flower programming, jewel programming, delta programming, etc.) comes from conspiracy theories promoted by Fritz Springmeier (a self-proclaimed deprogrammer) and Cisco Wheeler (the alleged Monarch slave he claims he deprogrammed). They published three books - They Know Not What They Do: Illustrated Guide to Monarch Control (published 1995), The Illuminati Formula Used To Create A Total Undetectable Mind-Controlled Slave (1996), and Deeper Insights Into The Illuminati Formula (1997).

They claimed that Project Monarch was practiced by the none other than the Illuminati! Here are some quotes from The Illuminati Formula:

Over the years, I have spent thousands of hours studying the Illuminati, the Intelligence agencies of the world, and the occult world in general. The centerpiece of these organizations is the trauma-based mind control that they carry out. Without the ability to carry out this sophisticated type of mind-control using MPD, drugs, hypnosis and electronics and other control methodologies, these organizations would fail to keep their dark evil deeds secret.

Illuminati--The Illuminati are 13 elite bloodlines which have manuevered themselves into control over this planet. They lead double lives, one for society and a hidden one which is based on a gnostic luciferian philosophy which consists of lots of blood rituals.

The Monarch program is based upon Illuminati and Nazi goals to create a Master race in part through genetics. If knowledge can be passed genetically (which it is), then it is important that parents be found that can pass the correct knowledge onto those victims selected for the Monarch mind-control.

The Illuminati, of course, supposedly plans on instating a one world government - a conspiracy theory that's right out of The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion:

New World Order-- The New World Order is the global design for a One-World-Government One-World-Dictator and its constituents. Insiders call themselves the "network" and "the neighborhood".

They also claimed autism is a traumagenic "emotional problem" and described it as a state of being withdrawn from reality:

According to someone who has helped with the programming and Moon Child ceremonies, occasionally the child while in the womb when traumatized by the Moon Child rituals, retreats into its mind like a cocoon, and develops autism. Autism is an emotional problem where the child withdrawals from reality and goes into its own private world of altered states.

They claimed that numerous slaves were given "end time programming" to help put the Anti-Christ into power:

…programmers can place in post-hypnotic commands to do something on a certain date. The end time programming, that has Monarch slaves doing something at a specific date to create anarchy or to help the Anti-Christ come to power has been put in at this level.

They claimed Disney films are designed for programming and mind control:

Most of the Disney films are used for programming purposes. Some of them are specifically designed for mind-control.

They claimed The Lord of the Rings contains Illuminati programming:

Rings play a significant part in the lives and programming of slaves. One section that is coding/programming found in J.R.R. Tolkien's Lord of the Rings is One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them, One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them.

They claimed the Illuminati controlled people's thoughts with electromagnetic frequencies:

They have found that ELF and VLF electro-magnetic waves can be used to control people’s thoughts.

And of course they claim rock 'n roll music is an evil conspiracy:

Elvis & the Beatles were chosen by the Illuminati to introduce rock music to the United States.

They claimed the Samurai were practitioners of witchcraft and demonology, because these conspiracy theorists are nothing if not racist:

But the Samurai and many other martial arts also use occult powers, which are actually different forms of witchcraft and demonology, even though they don’t recognize it as such.

They claimed Delta alters are telepathic:

Telepathy is used by Delta teams to coordinate their activity and to sense if one of them is in danger.

They claim the Illuminati is in possession of a white gold powder that will make you psychic, cure all your diseases, and make you glow:

After ingesting the white gold for over 9 months, a subject will become extremely psychic and disease free. The person’s body will also glow.

They claimed that Monarch slaves can remember their Satanic genealogies going back to ancient times:

The memory storage area for the computers include the Emerald City Library (staying with the Wizard of Oz theme) which contains alters who's only function is to memorize & retain with photographic memories pages and pages of information. … The libraries contain the historical genealogies of satanic iniquity from early ancient times to present.

Many people today don't know the real origin of these ideas. Some try to downplay or hide them. But make no mistake, once you start start researching the actual origins of the Project Monarch mythos by tracing citations and comparing what various people are publishing, its origins in far right conspiracy theory culture are undeniable!

This type of programming has allegedly been practiced in the US for at least seventy years. And in all of this time, not a single document written by or for the programmers has ever come to light! The only people who know anything about it are people who come across literature written by conspiracy theorists, or those who have been demonstrably influenced by conspiracy theorists in some way.

[sauron-kraut]

Get to know your Mutuals

Thank you for tagging me @perlen-gold! 🖤

What's the origin of your blog's title? @lvsifer and I were talking about a certain Middle-Earth cookbook with some truly funky recipes, unfortunately there were none for Mairon so we were like... What would he eat? He would definitely be into eating raw meat. Mettbrötchen are a German specialty, basically a bread roll with butter and minced raw pork (yes, you heard that right), preferably with pepper and red onions. So Mairon's Mettbrötchen was born - doesn't it just fuck phonetically?

Favorite Fandoms: The Silm fandom 🖤 I have never been truly active in any other fandom.

OTP(s) + shipname: Angbang (Mairon/Melkor). Most other ships I love/like are fucked up in a way that makes OTP sound wrong to describe them (not that an OTP can't have a fucked up dynamic of course!).

Favorite color: red, black, gold, rusty colors, yellow

Favorite game: Not a a gamer person.

Song stuck in your head:

Weirdest habit/trait? Super randomly talking to myself when I'm alone at home? Could be pieces of dialogue I'm planning for a fic, could be imaginary discussion scenarios with friends or coworkers... you name it.

Hobbies: Writing.

If you work, what's your profession? I'm a linguist specializing in language change, particularly grammatical change. I don't currently work in that field though; I work at a technical university in event management and student recruiting.

If you could have any job you wish what would it be? I'd work as a linguist and teach at university again.

Something you're good at: Learning languages quickly, imitating native accents in languages (other than English, probably due to my idgaf attitude when it comes to that, so have a weird mix of different accents in English mixed with a very slight German and Dutch accent. lol), teaching, public speaking, being thoughtful with gifts, cooking

Something you're bad at: Remembering birthdays, sometimes texting back, sometimes cleaning, MATH (oh god)

Something you excel at: being anxious, overthinking, understanding how languages are structured and applying this to learning them

Something you love: reading, poetry, writing, my apartment, partying, various altered states of consciousness from time to time, dancing, 80s music, techno, prosecco, cooking, food, Berlin, fandom, my mom, my friends, traveling

Something you could talk about for hours without off the cuff: linguistics, language change, The Silm

Something you hate: coriander and water melon

Something you collect: Nothing really that comes to mind.

Something you forget: birthdays, appointments

What's your love language? The concept of love languages has its problems but if I just use this to describe how I do express my love: giving cute gifts, cooking for people, listening to them, open communication, spending quality time together

Favorite movie/show: LOTR and MANY more, show: DARK, Sense8, The Sinner

Favorite food: so many different soups, kebap, pizza, STEAK, schnitzel, peruvian food, birria tacos

Favorite animal: three-toed sloth

Are you musical? I know how to play the saxophone and I did so decently. But I wouldn't say I'm musical.

What were you like as a child? I have to quote @perlen-gold here: An insufferable know-it-all.

Favorite subject at school? German, English, philosophy, biology

Least favorite subject? MATHS. And PE.

What's your best character trait? I'm honest and good at communicating openly.

What's your worst character trait? Avoidant behavior, procrastinating literally everything

If you could change any detail of your day right now what would it be? I would make the sun rise again so it doesn't feel like another of those depressing winter nights.

If you could travel in time who would you like to meet? I can't think of anyone I'd genuinely want to meet.

Recommend one of your favorite fanfics (spread the love!):

elektra by @lvsifer. What a masterpiece. Also please have a look at the fanfics I recommended here!

Last but not least, show your favorite fanart of your favorite character(s) (please remember to credit/add links!):

Mairon by @lvsifer

So many more art from talented and skilled artists that I love, but I had to make a decision here and this one will haunt me forever 🖤

✨Tagging @crackinthecup, @cilil, @elevenelvenswords, @admirably-abhorrent, @tauw-nu-fuin, @peasant-player, @blauerregen and @lvsifer

[fatliberation]

"I didn't give out any medical advice" lmao you were heavily implying that person's doctor was wrong and that they shouldn't listen to their doctor's advice. that's irresponsible. you're going to get somebody killed with this bs

If their doctor's advice is to lose weight through dieting, it is wrong and I can say that in full confidence because it. (x) doesn't. (x) work. (x) Here! (x) Take (x) these! I am (x) chucking (x) peer reviewed sources (x) at you. (x)

Anti-fat bias is at work here. And so is a weight-loss market worth $90 BILLION as of 2024.

In 2013, UCLA researchers Traci Mann, Janet Tomiyama, and Britt Ahlstrom conducted the most comprehensive and rigorous analysis of diet studies, analyzing 31 long-term studies.

“What happens to people on diets in the long run?” Mann asked. “Would they have been better off to not go on a diet at all? We decided to dig up and analyze every study that followed people on diets for two to five years. We concluded most of them would have been better off not going on the diet at all. Their weight would be pretty much the same, and their bodies would not suffer the wear and tear from losing weight and gaining it all back.” (x)

Certain factors biased the diet studies to make them appear more effective than they really were. For one, many participants self-reported their weight by phone or mail rather than having their weight measured on a scale by an impartial source. Also, the studies have very low follow-up rates — eight of the studies had follow-up rates lower than 50 percent, and those who responded may not have been representative of the entire group, since people who gain back large amounts of weight are generally unlikely to show up for follow-up tests, Mann said.

Evidence suggests that repeatedly losing and gaining weight is linked to cardiovascular disease, stroke, diabetes and altered immune function. Mann and Tomiyama recommend that more research be conducted on the health effects of losing and gaining weight, noting that scientists do not fully understand how such weight cycling leads to adverse health effects.

“We asked what evidence is there that dieting works in the long term, and found that the evidence shows the opposite” Tomiyama said.

Here are some quotes I pulled directly from the study.

It is implicit in this definition that losing weight will lead to improved health, and yet, health outcomes are not routinely included in studies of diets.

Overall, there were only slight improvements in most health outcomes studied. Changes in diastolic and systolic blood pressure, fasting blood glucose, cholesterol, and triglyceride levels were small, and none of these correlated with weight change. There were also very small effects of these diets on lipid-lowering medication use and coronary morbidity and mortality. There were a few larger positive effects for hypertension and diabetes medication use, as well as diabetes and stroke incidence. In correlational analyses, however, we uncovered no clear relationship between weight loss and health outcomes related to hypertension, diabetes, or cholesterol, calling into question whether weight change per se had any causal role in the few effects of the diets. Increased exercise, healthier eating, engagement with the health care system, and social support may have played a role instead. Our findings are in line with a recent meta-analysis (Flegal, Kit, Orpana, & Graubard, 2013) that found that overweight and class I obesity were not associated with higher all-cause mortality. Moreover, Ortega and colleagues (2013) have documented metabolically healthy but obese individuals, and an emerging literature on the “obesity paradox”, whereby obesity appears to confer health benefits in certain diseases (Amundson, Djurkovic, & Matwiyoff, 2010), suggests that a disconnect between weight loss and health outcomes should not be surprising.

We believe the ultimate goal of diets is to improve people’s long-term health, rather than to reduce their weight. Our review of randomized controlled trials of the effects of dieting on health finds very little evidence of success in achieving this goal. If diets do not lead to longterm weight loss or long-term health benefits, it is difficult to justify encouraging individuals to endure them.

See for yourself.

[edensvessel]

What’s the problem with endo systems? I am not a system and don’t know much about this but I vaguely know what endo systems are, I just don’t know why they’re bad/wrong /genq

hello anon!

i would like to start this by saying that none of this is to invalidate anybody's experiences, but to point out that while your experiences are valid, that does not make them right. i can have a trigger of spoons but i cannot force everyone in the globe to stop using spoons for my benefit. self diagnosis is valid when you put in the proper research, so i'd suggest looking into things before you start labeling yourself with them. i say this because that is what i find a majority of endo systems do, for reasons i will explain below along with the sources provided. i do not think they are inherently bad people, i just think they are misinformed people that are doing a bad thing. that does not make them morally corrupt or mean that they are doing anything on purpose, no matter my feelings on the topic.

that said, i'll begin. i have sources listed at the end of this post for you to look into it further if you'd like.

endo systems are people that claim to be systems without trauma. that's medically not even possible, since the way alters are formed in the first place is the trauma that happens before the identity can fully integrate.

i'll break it down, and i will include some sources at the end if you'd like to look into it further.

when you are a child, your identity is not fully formed. it's not very clear exactly when the identity fully forms, but the general consensus is that is usually happens by the ages of 6-10.

before those ages, your identity is categorized into neat little parts. there's a part that focuses on anger, a part that focuses on sadness, a part that focuses on confusion, etc.

for a non-system, as their child brain ages, it learns things and absorbs them like a sponge. the child is in a safe-enough environment to retain memories of things happening around them. this provides an environment for the 'parts' of the identity to integrate into each other and form one full identity.

this is why you see those memes where people joke about randomly coming into consciousness at a random point in their childhood. that's your identity integrating.

for systems, their parts could not integrate. they stayed as separate parts. why? because their environment was not safe enough. their brains were witness to repeated trauma that affected them so heavily that the brain essentially said, "I cannot function like a normal person if I were to remember any of this, I have to protect myself," and stopped the identity from integrating.

a quote from the first source listed below, "Instead of integrating into a core personality, people with DID experience prolonged trauma in early childhood which causes the original different "behavioral states" present from birth to become parts of the personality that are increasingly dissociated (disconnected) from each other, which prevents them from integrating to form a core personality. Over time, the early dissociated behavioral states, influenced by the trauma, develop into dissociative identities (also known as dissociative personality states,distinct personality states, alternate identities or alters). It is generally accepted that developing multiple identities protects the child psychologically by keeping trauma memories and emotions contained with specific identities, rather than overwhelming the child completely."

so when endogenic "systems" come along to say that they are systems without ever having experienced trauma, that is factually and medically incorrect.

and before anyone brings up systems that don't remember their trauma, i'd like to point out that not remembering your trauma as a system is the entire point of your brain forming alters. that does not make you endogenic. as well as that, saying "I just go by the term endogenic because I don't remember my trauma" is also contradictory to the endogenic term, because you're admitting that you do have trauma.

living as a system is very difficult. you cannot "become" a system just because you want to. you cannot "become" a system just as a symptom of neurodivergence. it's a trauma response. it's like when people say "omg, i'm so ocd" just because they're a perfectionist. that's also why many systems say that endos are ableist.

i understand that a lot of singlets want to accept endos because there's so many moral dilemmas in the modern age. i implore you to do your own research. no, that does not mean scroll the tumblr syscourse tag and observe fights between systems and endos. no, that does not mean send asks to endos or people who dislike them, including me. that means do your own research. look into the dsm-v. look into medical records. ensure your sources are unbiased. this is not me hammering the anon for sending me an ask, consider this a small nudge in a different direction.

a lot of this is me heavily summarising to make things easier to understand, but you can check these sources if you want to look into it deeper. i highly suggest that you do, even if you're not a system.

[matrixxsystem]

Boots With The Spurs (the real first chapter)

"Turn left here."

"Where?"

"Just- Up here, left- Left! Your other left!"

"Don't yell at me!"

"Then don't miss the turn!"

"Do you wanna drive?"

"I would but I can't!"

"Well-! Oh.. S-Sorry Don.."

"..It's fine.. just... You stick to driving and I'll stick to giving directions okay big guy?"

"Yeah... Okay.." The drive seemed to take forever, going from New York all the way to "the middle of nowhere" wasn't exactly around the block. Donnie glanced back to where Mikey was sitting, a Jupiter Jim comic in metal hands Donnie had loaned him while his were still recovering. Leo was sitting next to him, watching Mikey read to him doing his signature voices for all the characters. There was a faint smile on his face but it was overcast by the dark circles under his eyes and the bandages covering his limbs. Everyone still had injuries that were hearing but Leos took the most time considering he got the worst of it.. Well, him and Raph really. Raph was another case, it had only been four years since the "Kraang incident" and everyone seemed to be dealing with their own aftershocks even now. 

Leo lost his arm coming through the portal back to Earth, his mind was a mess, constantly having nightmares and losing sleep over his memories. Raph lost his right eye, and split a new alter from the time he was possessed by the Kraangs parasites. Donnie suffered severe nerve damage in his back that sometimes flared enough to cause seizures, Leaving him bedridden, sometimes for days. And Mikey's carpal tunnel got worse, with mild Tendinopathy added to his diagnosis only meaning he wasn't able to use his hands half as much as he'd like to. He could hardly hold a pair of chopsticks long enough to finish a meal before his hands started to cramp up. But they all helped each other through it, they all took turns playing nurse and making sure their family was okay. Or as okay as they could be at least.. The final straw that made them want to leave the city was when Splinter passed away and Leo had a minor mental breakdown. They all decided to go somewhere they didn't have to hide. Somewhere quiet, without the constant reminders of everything they'd lost or the constant threat of danger. With the NYC foot clan disbanded there was less crime, and less reason for them to patrol or try to be heros there. "This is it." Donnie said as he pointed to a driveway that was coming up. "Decrease speed and proceed into the driveway." 

"On it, so.. This is like... A house big enough for all a' us right?"

"Something like that. But fret not, I have a plan to make sure its able to accommodate all of our needs." Raph parked the car, everyone perked up now that they'd stopped moving. Mikey rushed to open the door, excited to see what their new home was going to be like. He expression quickly went from ecstatic to confused. "Dee.. Are we at the right place? This one looks... Janky"

"It is 'Janky' Michael, it's a large plot of land I only managed to get for cheap because of it's quote unquote 'Jankyness' so.."

"It's not janky, it's just a fixer upper is all! Nothin' a lil elbow grease and.. uh... Regular grease can't fix!" Leo got up last, following everyone out of the turtle tank. The overgrown grass and weeds, the dirt road beneath his feet, the warm breeze against his back.. "Raph as fun as this brotherly DIY project sounds, were all seriously injured and none of us can hold or lift anything long enough to repair the front door  let alone this entire house. This is a job for my tech.. The last job for them..." He took out a remote from his pocket and pressed a few buttons, dozens of small robots sprung from the tank and ran towards the house. Scanners covered the house, barn, and even the yard. Then they took a moment to calculate before they started humming with energy. 

"Donnie..?"

"They're supposed to sound like they're about to blow up, the internal motors are half the size of their exoskeletons to give them extra power. Just sit back and be amazed." A few took to the lawn, what looked like a mouth turning into spinning blades that trimmed and seemed to eat the grass. Others went to the house, and started repairing the wood, spewing resin and metal threads, gnawing the broken wood into clean cuts and merging them with the spun material. Others did the same with the barn. And the last few flung themselves into drains and pipes, cleaning them from the inside. They all came together, mixing the materials they'd harvested and made it into paint, coating the house and barn. And after five minutes the house looked brand new, like they were transported to a completely different place.

Donnie gently clapped his hands together and the robots disappeared into the house, "Alright fam, we have two hours, sixteen minutes and forty three seconds till the sun sets. As long as you stay on the property you are free to do at you please, but be reminded there are wild animals and birds of prey about and I won't have a foolproof fence up and running till the bots are finished recharging. Mikey's ordering dinner for us when he feels up to the task and we will be calling first dibs on rooms with the usual exception that the biggest one goes to Raph and I get one downstairs." 

Leo glanced between them with a nod, "I'm uh.. I just wanna sit out here for a bit, stretch my legs and all if it's cool with you." 

"In the grass? I mean, suit yourself but take a shower when you get inside cause, eugh, dirt.."

"Donnie don't you love gardening?"

"Ironic isnt it?" 

"Oh oh I want to pick my room! C'mon Red let's go see what it looks like on the inside!" Raph took Mikey's hand and let himself be pulled into the house, Donnie was busy walking the perimeter and taking measurements, just his usual nerd stuff. Leo went and sat in the grass, it looked faded and dead, but it wasn't as scratchy as it looked, it was actually kind of soft.. He felt another warm breeze and laid back, one arm behind his head as he looked up at the sky. It was so quiet compared to the city, no cars, busses, or trains. No one shouting or promoting anything in the streets. Not even the constant chatter of birds and various stray animals. Sure everything ached, but breathing the fresh country air made that pain seem so small. 

"Leo- Hey, Leoo"

...

"Jesus Crimmity Leo get up before you catch a disease-"

Leo opened his eyes and suddenly the sky was dark. He saw Donnie standing over him with an unamused expression. "Oh.. Hey Dee... I uh"

"You fell asleep. It's fine but maybe do it inside the house next time? Kay?"  Leo rolled his eyes as Donnie offered his hand to help Leo up. He knew by now as much as he didn't want to admit it that he needed to accept defeat. He took Donnie's hand and stood up, "Thanks. What did Mike end up getting for dinner?" 

"You'll see, just get inside before something eats you"

"Pfft.. Okay"

Leo headed inside, opening the door to reveal a surprisingly nice place..? A few feet ahead was a straight staircase leading to the second floor. To the right was a open archway into a decently sized kitchen with an island counter and everything they needed, well, except the food but all the appliances were there! To the left was probably going to be the living room, right now it was pretty empty but it wouldn't take love for Donnie to fill each corner with a plant or Mikey to staple his art to the walls and make it look more lived in. He could see it now, how lively this place would be once they settled in and started their usual shenanigan's.. What were their usual shenanigan's again? He rubbed his eyes trying to think back to why they even left New York in the first place.. He knew his dad passed away but that wasn't the only reason right? 

"Hey Leo! Come check out our rooms!!" Leo snapped out of his thoughts and saw Mikey waving at him from the top of the stairs. He smiled a little and put his hand on the railing heading up to see what the commotion was about. 

"Alright alright I'm coming! Which rooms did you guys pick?" Mikey was practically bounding in place as he waited for Leo to reach the top, widely gesturing to a door that already had an Encanto style sketch scribbled onto the front. "This is my room! It had the best lighting for art! Raphs is the one across from yours over there!" He walked past him pointing to the door with a small blue sticker stuck on at eye height, on the left side of the hall, the back of the house. Then to the door on the right with several red stickers. "Donnie says the one next to mine can be his too so he has a room up here to store stuff, but dont worry that's why he gets the small one hehehe" Leo nodded a little, opening the door to his room, it had a bed, classic. Some empty shelves, a small dresser and two boxes which were presumably his stuff from the tank. He looked back to Mikey who stood in the doorway, still looking so excited he might combust or something. "Soooo? What do you think?" 

"I think.." He shrugged and put his hand on Mikey's shoulder, "It's nice. Really. I can't wait to put it all together, maybe you could make some posters to liven the place up a bit when you're up for it?" 

"Ohhh that's a good idea! Yes! Well need one with cats, and one with lasers! And one with a cat, shooting lasers!!" Leo let out a little chuckle, Mikey always had the craziest ideas..

"Hey Donnie said you took care of dinner, so what're we having?" 

"He didn't tell you? That silly goose, I got some stew from some local restaurant. The.. The Fancy Phrog or something idunno, but it's really good! The dining room is through the kitchen, or there's a hall behind the stairs that goes there too so, take your pick! I'm gonna see if Raph wants seconds"

Leo nodded and left after Mikey, heading downstairs and taking a right to see the rest of the house on his way. The living room had a bookshelf and a long couch, a few of the robots from earlier had formed a monkey chain and were passing books from a box up to the bot who was neatly placing them on the shelf. There were a total of three rooms in that hallway, one was a full bathroom on the left, then Donnie's lab/room in the middle, and a spare room that they had agreed would be their medbay across from the archway to the back of the dining room. Donnie was sitting at the table, he didn't have his phone like he usually would, not even a tablet or projector.. Instead he had a notepad and a pen scribbling something down with one hand while he ate with the other. Leo took the blue bowl that hadn't been filled yet and served himself from the container on the table. "Watcha writing there..?"

"Code.."

"... Okay .. For what?"

"A sentient tractor"

"I'm sorry what!?"

"Kidding. Sort of.. It is code, but it's... How do I put this in a way a Leo would understand- I want a function that lets the machine assess the situation and use variables to determine the best course of action, but the parameters for those variables isn't set in stone, so it needs to be able to adapt and understand a vast blanket of skills to have a full and accurate assessment.."

"...Okay so, a robot with opinions?"

"Sure, well go with that." 

Leo shrugged and ate his food, he was never a big fan of vegetables but the stew was pretty damn good.. His mind wandered back to why they were there in the first place, it was something unpleasant for sure but why couldn't he remember? He looked back up at Donnie, "Hey... This is.. It's gonna sound stupid but can I ask you something?"

"That's never stopped you before."

"Oh ha ha, but seriously, why did we move out here again?" Donnie's hand stopped writing, he looked back at Leo a little confused at first but there was something else too, he was nervous? "You don't recall you're morphine induced rant about wanting to be a 'cowboy baby' or however the Vine goes?"

"..No- But c'mon that can't be the only reason we left the city right? I mean, you guys wouldn't leave everything just cause I randomly blurted out that I wanted to be a cowboy, while I was loopy"

"Well- No that wasn't the only thing that provoked us leaving. But if you don't know the reasons maybe it's better to keep it that way? Your brain might be trying to protect you from information you might not want to know?"

"Oh please, I saw big mama shoot webs from her ass and saw Jericho throw up the special sauce that's used on his food. I think I can handle whatever my brain is worried about!" Donnie sighed, putting his pen down, "Leo, I shouldn't be the one to talk about this really.. But a lot of bad things happened, it was just a constant stream of bad luck and injuries, nearly losing everything, and everyone.. It was bad, so the less you remember the better."

"...But that doesn't answer my question-"

"Then ask someone else! I can't talk about it."

"Can't or won't??"

"Fine. I won't talk about it." Leo huffed and leaned back in the chair. "Ugh... Whatever" Donnie took his bowl and notepad, heading into the kitchen then to his room downstairs. And Leo was alone again. 

-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-

The next morning rolled around  and it seemed like the only thing to do was unpack, anytime Leo tried to ask Raph about why they were there he was only met with, "Go ask Raph" which really wasn't helping.. When he asked Mikey he was also told to "Go ask Raph" so, it was a lose-lose battle really. Eventually he gave up and finished unpacking his boxes, there really wasn't much besides his knick knacks and comics. Most of his other things were trashed or left behind.. He was older now anyways, a lot of what he kept in his teens just didn't spark joy like they used to. 

He pulled out a string of photo booth pictures with him and what used to be his boyfriend, he scoffed at the pictures but he'd held into them all this time. It showed him, on his twenty first birthday and the guy beside him with his arm around Leo. Some dog yokai with blonde fur and a streak of blue dye in his hair, he had a drink in hand and so did Leo. They looked messy and absolutely trashed, but happy. If he was being honest he didn't remember much of that year or the one before it, but like Mikey says, if you don't remember then maybe it's not worth remembering? He set the pictures down on his dresser and flattened the boxes under his arm, "There's gotta be a way to remember all the stuff I'm missing right..? Maybe Cherry can help.. Leo headed out of his room and downstairs where Mikey had dragged Brick, one of Raphs alters, to play "Downbeat" a game Leo never understood, I mean all you do is shake dice and then yell 'downbeat' it's not very fun in his opinion. "Hey, can you help me Mikey-"

"Downbeat!" 

"Mikey hey-"

"Oh! Hey Leo! You wanna play with us?" 

"I'd rather stick my tail in an anthill, then in a fire- Sorry, no, but I do need your help with something soo.. Can you come here for a sec" Mikey pouted a little but put the dice down and headed into the kitchen with Leo, "What's up? Need help rewrapping your nub?"

"Wha-? No, no this is unrelated to me. I need to talk to Cherry" 

"Well, Brick's fronting right now, it might be rude to ask him to leave?"

"I know, that's why I need your help.. Think maybe you would be down to bake? You get to cook, I get to talk to Cherry, you two get some quality time?" Mikey narrowed his eyes at him for a moment, "I don't know why you need to talk to her, but I do want to break in our new kitchen so.. Fine, I'll do it." Leo smiled and put his hand on Mikey's head ruffling the air where hair would be. "While you do that I'm gonna go see what Dons up to, any idea where hes at?" 

"Yeah uh, he's in his downstairs room, the middle one." Leo nodded and headed through the dining room to get to Donnie's room, he knocked seven times in a special pattern. "Password" 

"Wha-? Donnie, open up I did the special knock"

"Password." Leo sighed and rubbed the bridge between his eyes, "God damnit- Just- Open the goddamn door." After a moment of silence the door opened, "You sir, are no fun."

"It's too early for this."

"It's 11:15."

"My point stands."

"State your business"

"Brotherly shenanigan's."

"For or against?"

"For, it's already in motion"

"Seeking asylum then?"

"Why would I do that with you? No, I'm killing time while I wait for the pay off." 

"Noted. Entry granted." Leo stepped into Donnie's room, a few boxes were stacked along the walls, a table was set up with a chair and one of his forearm crutches leaning against it. Along with a bed on the opposite wall. A potted plant already sat on the table beside a stack of papers. "Getting all settled in are we?" Leo joked as he went and sat on the bed. Donnie gave a little shrug as he sat back in his chair, taking one of the papers off the top of the pile and sketching something out. "Yeah yeah, I know, I should be focused less on causing trouble and more on fixing things up or whatever clever advice you have in mind."

"Well that wasn't exactly what I had in mind, but close enough. You're still healing, not just physically either."

"Whats actually funny, is that you guys keep telling me that I'm healing, but you still won't tell me what I'm healing from- I mean if you're going to lie at least make it convincing"

"Oh what? You want me to break your foot or something?"

"I'm just saying a physical injury is way more of a reason to be bedridden than a mental one"

"Well think of it like your brain being punched, is that a mental image wounded enough to make you stop acting like a dum dum?"

"I didn't come here to get roasted."

"Then you came to the wrong brother, my sanctuary comes at a price, otherwise what would be the means to harbor such a fugitive within my quarters?"

"Ugh, I lose braincells when you start using big words-" Donnie rolled his eyes as he kept writing, it was only quiet for a few more moments before one of the small robots that had rebuilt the house came to his side. They both looked down at the small machine and waited for it to do something. 

It started dancing

Leo looked more and more confused and Donnie just nodded along, "Mhmm, Mhmm, I see" He muttered as the little jig went on. "Oh you can't be serious- Did you actually program them to talk through dance? Just give it a voice box-!"

"Shhh! He's not finished. Please, Stephan, continue."

"Stephan??"

"I said shhh!!" He watched as the robot danced for another minute or so before bowing, Donnie gave a small applause and leaned over to extend his hand, picking the robot up and examining it closely. "Well- Are you gonna tell me what it said?"

"..You're still here?"

"Yes! And I'm being nosey! So what's the deal with that thing?"

"To answer your previous question, yes and no. The dancing itself wasn't the form of communication but it was the steps. The tapping was mores code, he was informing me about the structures that were reformed and the ones that would need to be repaired by hand."

"..Oh?"

"Ill be taking care of it later, thankfully with the long, long drive out here I had plenty of time to rest and gather strength so that I would be able to do a fair amount of physical labor provided my bots were unable or I was unable to have one of the Raphs help me since they're quite a bit stronger. But don't worry about it."

"Well hey wait I can help-"

"Did you not listen to the part I said fifteen minutes ago? You, my dear dum dum, are still recovering and are down one arm. While you'd be a good supervisor, or even director if you could read blueprints, it still wouldn't be as much help as the physical strength required to say, lift a post or a seventeenth of a ton of bricks. So, the gesture is appreciated but I'll pass. Besides, you're still seeking shelter correct? Just, sit here and don't touch anything. We'll watch a movie or something you approve of later." 

"Are you seriously gonna go out there?" Donnie looked unamused at his poor attempt to prevent him from leaving, "Should I be worried?" He asked, pushing some papers aside to organize them while he waited for Leo to try and rationalize how much of a dum dum he was being. "Well- No.. But..." Donnie rolled his eyes, "Then yes, Once all the repairs are fully complete we can start doing the real work." He got up from his chair, about to head out. "Real work?" Donnie nodded, "But of course." He looked back to Leo as he stood in the doorway.

"You didn't think I'd purchase all this barren land and not plant something, did you?" Chapter 2

[vidreview]

VIDREV: "Plagiarism and You(Tube)" by Hbomberguy.

[originally posted december 7th 2023]

i didn't initially plan to do a full VIDREV for this one. it's a long video that speaks plenty for itself, revealing a veritable cottage industry of video essayists who've found great success in brazenly stealing the works of marginalized creators. it's an infuriating watch, especially as someone who has put a lot of work over a lot of years into getting better as an essayist. at a moment when the gormless profit-chasing business degree havers of the world are pretty unambiguously winning in every avenue imaginable, it's gratifying to see someone like Hbomberguy use his significant platform to at least make a dent in that trend. i had a few gripes, sure, but i didn't figure they were worth the trouble. of course now it's been out for a few days, the video already has over 6.8 million views, and people are still talking about it on every single social media website of note. watching that discourse evolve from afar has sharpened some of the round edges on my aforementioned gripes, and given me reason to think that maybe weighing in isn't a totally fruitless endeavor. and besides, what's the point of having a video essay review blog if you're not gonna review what is arguably the video essay of the moment? ahhh, there's a Faustian bargain if ever i heard one.

in this post, i'm going to be critical of Hbomberguy's "Plagiarism and You(Tube)" on a few fronts of debatable importance. but first, i want to make it clear that i am genuinely grateful to Hbomb for putting so much time and effort into this investigation. plagiarism is a serious accusation that requires commensurate evidence, and Harris's got that covered in spades. the case is made so much harder to deny by the frequent juxtaposition of a plagiarist's voice-over with the original plagiarized text on screen reacting to minor trail-covering alterations. these sections occupy the bulk of this video's near 4 hour runtime, and while i have some issues with that length, i understand that the deluge of evidence is precisely to make sure that none of the plagiarists in question can continue dodging accusations the way they have done previously. in this process, Hbomb lays out a consistent playbook utilized by all manner of plagiarists, and (hypothetically) gives viewers the tools and awareness they need to better spot plagiarism in the future. this matters because, as he rightly points out, youtube isn't a fun little hobby site for posting silly cat videos anymore, there's real money to be made on the platform and virtually no oversight to protect creators with ethics and integrity (i wanted to pull a direct quote here but alas, you can't ctrl+f a video). it's an open question as to how or whether we can fix this problem, but we don't get to that conversation until we acknowledge that plagiarism is a legitimate, widespread, materially harmful phenomenon online. none of what i have to say in this review is meant to minimize its broad success in calling attention to a very real problem!

that said…

in the days since its release, i've seen a lot of back and forth over what this video is about. on one side you have folks calling for the blood of James Somerton and others mentioned in the essay, saying "fuck these people specifically." yet on another side, many insist that you're missing the point if all you see is more drama for the drama mill. "this is a systemic problem" they say, "that's what the video is about." i'm inclined to agree more with the latter than the former, as Hbomb does consistently circle back to talking about the unpaid victims of plagiarism, ending the video by explicitly highlighting underrated queer creators and even saying outright that he doesn't want the end result to be limited in scope to just retribution against these specific plagiarists.

and yet, when i see a meme like this one:

i can't help but think… is that what the video is about? is someone who just sees the drama missing the point? yes, certainly, Hbomb says as much, but how much does he actually say it compared to everything else? what's the proportion of (to be overly reductive) "drama content" to "systemic criticism"? because it seems to me that anyone who only/mostly gets "wow fuck these people in particular" out of this video has done nothing less than take the video in aggregate. the bulk of its runtime is spent detailing very specific acts of plagiarism, and while yes, as i said above, this abundance serves a very real purpose, it shouldn't go unacknowledged that the tone of these sections is often one of ridicule and mockery. i don't mean that as a criticism in and of itself, to be clear. you can draw a line from here directly backwards through all his "Measured Response" videos, dude cut his teeth on knocking overconfident hacks down a peg, a bit of ridicule and mockery is to be expected. but that does ultimately mean that Hbomb spends most of the video saying "fuck these people in particular," in a tone of voice he honed through many other videos devoted to saying "fuck this guy in particular", only occasionally stopping to add that "plagiarism is popular and insidious and even creators you trust might be doing it" before moving onto the next scornworthy particular guy. so it kind of doesn't matter that one is "the point" and the other is "missing the point" because he's genuinely saying both things, and he's saying one of them significantly more often than the other. you can't tell me the dunks aren't at least part of the point, and if they're part of it then they can and will be misconstrued by some as the whole point. the entertainment and spectacle of knocking these plagiarists down a peg is an indulgence that, while certainly earned, does exist in concrete tension with the systemic arguments that are meant to take priority. now, some of this does come down to how internet culture has shifted in the last decade to facilitate a much more aggressive style of engagement overall, which Harris cannot control no matter how often he says "don't harass the plagiarists." there isn't really a perfectly right way to go about this, and under the circumstances i do think he did far better than others might have done in his stead.

but even still, i think this misapprehension is made worse by the essay's conclusion, which in my opinion largely fails to tie the whole thing together into the systemic argument that supposedly is "the point" some viewers are missing. Harris commendably points out how the so-called AI revolution is at its core an act of automated civilization-scale plagiarism, and that future instances of plagiarism may be harder to catch precisely because of this technology. frankly i wish that perspective had taken up a solid 10% of the runtime rather than a couple paragraphs at the very end, seeing as on balance it's the far bigger and more likely threat to the livelihoods of people watching than old-school direct plagiarism, but that's me. what really bugged me was the brevity with which he discussed possible solutions to the problem. he rightly points out that youtube implementing a plagiarism reporting system would just be another tool for bad faith actors to silence marginalized creators on the platform, and then… he kinda gives up? he shrugs his shoulders and says, well, for now, just talking about plagiarism and spreading awareness of it is enough. for as well-intentioned and, generally speaking, true as that is, it bugs me as an essayist because i believe that a big part of the job is or ought to be expanding the audience's ability to imagine what's possible even if you aren't 100% sure about the answers yourself.

these are all very much "how i would have written it differently" criticisms, so they aren't particularly worth much, but i do feel it's odd that he doesn't even broach the subject of federal regulation, platform control, unionization efforts, or even just good old-fashioned consumer activism. virtually every website that the creative economy hangs on is a venture-capital backed corporate venture, and their ad-driven models for profiteering at a moment when wages are stagnant and layoffs are happening everywhere is, like, the reason this is such a problem. to address plagiarism as a systemic issue, we need to understand the systemic enablers of it as a behavior. if creators weren't getting such a small slice of the revenue pie, if we had more control over the platform and what rises to the top, if the companies that owned these platforms were beholden to federal regulations, if the government increased arts funding and gave out grants to independent creators that involved third-party quality checks, if online video creators had any manner of collective labor power, if the cost of living was lower by way of public healthcare, free education, mass public transit, and affordable housing, then this would be a drastically different conversation. these are not non-sequitors! this is as much an economic problem as it is a cultural one, so any proposed solution that stops at changing the culture is necessarily incomplete and doomed to fail.

look, i don't expect Hbomb to have the answers. nobody has the answers. but i think it's a bit short-sighted to leave so many possibilities unsaid when the one concrete possibility discussed is immediately (correctly) written off as a bad idea. it leads to a conclusion that feels iffy, a bit defeated, lost at sea, and that's an infectious mood. if the first step to solving plagiarism as a systemic problem is to encourage talking about it openly, i think it's equally important to at the very least gesture in the direction of the many possible avenues for a systemic solution, no matter how impossible or ridiculous they might seem in the current political climate. in point of fact, i think it's of utmost importance to include these possibilities precisely because they seem impossible, otherwise we will forever be trapped in a world of insufficient half measures, meekly reifying the conservative austerity of the liberal order because it's easier and safer than taking a wild shot in the dark.

again, i want to stress that this is a deeply subjective criticism. i'm an ornery Marxist, of course i have these kinds of gripes. and it's easy to get lost in criticizing what isn't there, which as an exercise generally tells you more about the critic than the object being criticized. so, to close out, i'm gonna shake my fist a little at something that is there.

there's a moment at about one hour thirty-five minutes in where Harris turns on some colored lights to get that patented blue-purple Bisexual Lighting, and then he says this:

This is a whole style of video now, and by "style" I mean one person did it first and then a bunch of boring people ripped her off. Stealing from lots of places is inspiration, but stealing from one place is plagiarism… unless you call it The BreadTube Style, and then it's fine. I don't even know what a BreadTube is, I just woke up one day and was told that I was in it, and that people hated me for being in it. I don't even know what it is!

i understand where this jab is coming from-- the whole BreadTube scene was a melodramatic nightmare, on account of being an audience-invented genre which that audience (and later creators who emerged from that audience) often inaccurately treated as a coherent movement. i understand the frustration expressed by a lot of creators in that first generation of left-ish essayists (Hbomb, Lindsay Ellis, Dan Olson, Contrapoints etc) with the atmosphere of that moment, and certainly don't begrudge them a desire to distance themselves from it and ridicule its shortcomings.

but this brief little jokey aside left a bad taste in my mouth. the creator he's talking about being "ripped off" here is obviously Contrapoints, who brought a colorful theatricality to her early work that elevated it above being something she shot for cheap in her apartment. this went hand in hand with her Socratic style of essaying, giving her characters a strange and vibrant world to occupy. i don't want to say she "did it first" because, let's be real, Natalie Wynn did not invent the idea of using dramatic lighting on the internet. but she was certainly the first person i saw on youtube doing it in video essays, and yeah, a lot of people followed her example including me!

but that's not the same thing as plagiarism, is it? this whole video is an extensive exploration of what genuinely counts as plagiarism: taking someone else's words and pretending that they're yours. style is almost never part of that conversation across the whole 4 hours, except where it involves use of prepackaged assets like transitions and stock footage, which Hbomb deliberately notes is fine and normal except when people act like they're the ones who invented it (this particularly comes up in the Legal Eagle section). by the terms of this joke, Abby Thorne of PhilosophyTube falls under the category of "boring people" who were "ripping off" Contrapoints even moreso than those who just lit videos like her, because she even does the Socratic-style dialogues! but somehow i don't think Harris would call that plagiarism. if the concern re: bisexual lighting in BreadTube is attribution, all i can say is that Natalie Wynn is one of the single most discussed and cited creators in the whole field. virtually everyone i can think of who "ripped her off" back in the day openly acknowledged being inspired by her at every possible opportunity. of course that's just my own biased recollection of the history, so who knows, maybe there are people out there acting like they did it first. but unlike most of the other victims of plagiarism provided in this video, Natalie Wynn is not wallowing in obscurity. her work is IMMENSELY successful, to the point where she's arguably the closest thing to a household name you can get from this space.

now, i'm sensitive to a joke like this because i always felt like if anything Natalie got too much credit for "inventing" the so-called "BreadTube style". her use of colored lights was striking and unique, yes, but it was also rudimentary and not particularly complicated. i worked in film lighting for enough years to see this "style" as equivalent to late 1910's era silent films blindly grasping at the bare fundamentals of montage that have become the backbone of all cinema. it's good, but it ain't Citizen Kane. i really hoped people would take Natalie's baseline not as a concrete template, but as a challenge to get even more ambitious and filmic with their lighting setups! instead things have stagnated, and we've kinda circled back around to a very slightly more colorful version of the standard pre-Contrapoints look. this is by no means to play down the work that Natalie did, because i know from my own years making video essays that it is NOT easy or simple to set up even rudimentary lighting that looks good. but come on man, have some perspective. she's a philosopher, not an electrician!

what's worse is that later on in the video, Hbomb talks about how many creators were inspired by AVGN to do twists on his formula, and why this was a good thing. near the end, when he's very rightly shouting out many underrated queer essayists, he spends a good chunk of time celebrating the spirit of remix that is so unique to the internet, insisting that there's a real tangible difference between plagiarism and inspiration. this is good! i agree with him! which is why it's so bizarre that there's this one aside that equates using bisexual lighting to plagiarism! it's a disarmingly hypocritical moment in an otherwise relatively on-point video, and its presence kind of weakens the rest of the essay for me (especially if you're sensitive to how near this comes to being all-out drama youtube, as clearly even Hbomb is by his own admission in the video).

the last i'll say is that i find it frustrating when a creator in Hbomb's position tries to act like BreadTube wasn't A Thing. no, it wasn't A Thing the way quite a lot of people thought it was (including many who called themselves BreadTubers). but these creators were often collaborating with each other to make guest appearances, read quotes, etc. certainly they mentioned each other often enough, which couldn't help solidifying in the audience's mind that there was indeed A Thing happening that involved multiple people with similar creative & political goals, regardless of whether or not that was the creators' intent. it wasn't formal, and it certainly wasn't A Movement (the lack of an articulated ideological spine is a BIG part of why things went sour the way they did), but they were happy enough to play along before Drama blew the whole endeavor to smithereens. and notably, successive generations of creators (like Sophie From Mars, Jack Saint, Lily Alexandre, CJ the X, and yes, also me again) saw the BreadTube genre as a place where interesting things were happening, where the kinds of things they/we wanted to create were encouraged and supported vociferously. it's no coincidence that a LOT of up-and-coming trans creators doing very BreadTube-y things got a huge boost from guesting on Hbomb's DK64 Nightmare Stream in 2019 (including me again, haha, oops), because there was A Thing happening even if most people were wrong about what, exactly, it was. none of this is to say that Hbomb should call himself a BreadTuber-- god no, i hope no one does that ever again, i'm embarrassed that i did back in the day! but this history does exist. mostly i just think this joke would've been better left on the cutting room floor.

okay, i think that's enough criticism for one day. one thought i had coming out of this is that i wish more video essays would publish concurrently with a written version on a dedicated website. not just a transcript but an article-format version. i wonder sometimes about the difficulty of indexing video essays, of getting their contents into a historical record that can be printed out and put into a library. but anyway, all my gripes aside, it's a good video and you should go watch it! preferably in chunks over a day or two!