#just thinking about things. neurodivergence and comorbidity and such

[c733937-123]

Day 16

So my therapist said that I could have autism and I should be tested for it, so that's fun! Nothing wrong with autism, just have ADHD and a case of "could this be X or just Y". More neurodivergency for me i guess

[azuremist]

Haruka isn’t autistic-coded – he has an intellectual disability (and why that matters)

(AO3 Mirror)

A lot of people in the MILGRAM fandom (especially English-speaking MILGRAM fandom) state that Haruka is autistic-coded, as if it’s fact. Most recognize that Haruka is coded as disabled. (If you didn’t recognize that, I hope this post will help to explain why.) However, to state that he is coded as autistic specifically is incorrect. Haruka is coded as intellectually disabled.

Now, there are likely two things that contribute to this issue. One is the invisibility of intellectual disability as a whole, and another is the fact that a lot of this has to do with things that only someone who speaks Japanese would understand (such as complex vs non-complex words in Japanese).

In this post, I plan to lay out what an intellectual disability is and how it differs from neurodivergencies such as autism or ADHD. After that, I want to discuss the way Haruka speaks and uses words, the symbolism in his MVs, and how this lends to him being coded as intellectually disabled. Finally, I want to discuss why this even matters at all. Because, in truth, viewing Haruka as autistic instead of intellectually disabled leaves the viewer misunderstanding his story in a huge way that seems far too common in English-speaking MILGRAM fandom. So, I hope you listen to what I have to say.

What does it mean to be intellectually disabled?

Confusing autism and intellectual disability (henceforth referred to as ID) is not an issue unique to the MILGRAM fandom. They are quite commonly mistaken for each other, in the same way that autism and ADHD are both commonly mistaken for each other. And for the same reason, too – autism and ID are comorbid. This means that, if someone is autistic, they are more likely to have an ID. For this reason, it makes perfect sense to headcanon Haruka as autistic. I headcanon him as autistic, myself, actually. But, in this post, I’m going to be strictly talking about his coding, not headcanons, and he is very specifically coded with an ID.

So, what’s the difference? In the words of the National Institutes of Health, “Whereas ID is associated with general deficits across developmental domains, ASD is in fact defined by the observation that social communication deficits are particularly impairing.” (Source)

To say this in layman’s terms, autism is primarily characterized by difficulties in social communications. Cognitive abilities in autistic individuals vary, just like with allistic individuals, but the defining features are issues with social interaction and nonverbal communication. Autism by itself effects how effectively one communicates, but not intelligence. On the other hand, ID is a limitation on intellectual functioning, just like the name implies. This causes issues in areas like learning, problem-solving, and abstract reasoning.

A lot of people think ID is a synonym for ‘learning disability’. ‘Learning disability’ is an umbrella term that covers things such as dyslexia and dysgraphia. This isn’t the case. For one thing, ID can be a diagnosis on its own. ID is subdivided into syndromic ID, where intellectual deficits are present with other signs and symptoms, and nonsyndromic ID, where ID is, itself, the diagnosis. Examples of syndromic IDs include fragile X syndrome, and Down syndrome. For another, those with learning disabilities tend to have average to above-average intellectual abilities. Their disorder affects their ability to acquire and process information, but they are still able to learn. In contrast, ID affects the ability to learn at all, as well as affecting development and general function.

ID is a debilitating disorder. Many people with an ID cannot live independently, require help with self-care activities, and have limited communicative abilities. Understanding this – particularly, how ID is often a disability that requires a caregiver – is a key point to understanding Haruka as a character. But that’s to be covered later.

Words

The reason why this is a problem in the English fandom specifically is because the main thing tipping off the viewer to Haruka’s ID is the way that he speaks.

‘Weakness’, Haruka’s first-trial song, is written entirely in INCREDIBLY basic, elementary-level kanji – mostly hiragana and katakana. In fact, his first-trial song is misspelled in a lot of official releases of the song (‘Weekness’), which is a good way to get the same effect across. This is not the case across all platforms, though, for whatever reason. He also writes, in his trial 1 interrogation, with only that elementary-level kanji; often only one-word answers. The only complicated characters he knows are usually ones that mean something along the lines of, “I’m a stupid, idiot child,” which can be assumed to be because that’s what he has heard his whole life.

While I’m unsure if it is ENTIRELY in this basic kanji, his second trial song and interrogation is at least mostly written like this, as well. At this point, Muu is teaching him how to read and write (or, that’s what’s implied), but, even with that one-on-one attention, he is still speaking like a child most of the time to the Japanese ear.

When he’s forced to use or listen to words outside of this elementary-level kanji, he gets audibly confused, as well. In the AVIOT earbud collab, he has the voiceline, “Pairing seems to be in progress,” but, if you listen, he says “pairing” like it’s a question. (“Pair-ing?”) He doesn’t know the word is an English loanword that isn’t often used in everyday conversation, so he’s struggling to say it.

He also struggles when speaking to Es in his interrogations. He tries to say, “I will acknowledge any falsehood or silence,” but the words used are very advanced in Japanese. As such, he struggles with it, repeating, “False-hood? Si-lence?” Multiple similar exchanges happen in his interrogations, with Haruka misunderstanding words Es uses, and stuttering over unfamiliar words. The implication is that Haruka struggles with higher vocabulary or unfamiliar words, and with speaking and communication in general. He apologizes multiple times to Es for struggling, saying that he is not intelligent as an explanation multiple times. Additionally, in his second trial investigation, he talks about how he could never do the same things as everyone around him. When Es calls him stupid, he agrees. Es even states, “You really have no learning ability whatsoever.” When, mind you, having delayed or slowed learning is, like, the symptom of intellectual disability. It’s quite blatant. (Why is this not fandom consensus yet, again?)

Moving on from the point of how Haruka uses words, we can talk about other forms of word-based MILGRAM media. For example: when introducing himself, he says he thinks he’s 17, which implies that he isn’t actually sure. Additionally, there is lots of evidence for his intellectual disability in his interrogation questions:

He considers it impossible to learn another language

His dream is to ‘live normally’

He states he disappointed his father (not inherently an ID-related thing, but also, makes sense with his coding in mind)

Many answers imply that he’s been unable to live his own life, and he doesn’t really have any aspirations outside of being given attention

Finally, we have the lyrics to his songs. Again, on top of being written in very basic kanji, we have lines like the following, which include repeated themes of needing a caregiver (being ‘hopeless’ by himself), not being able to do what others can do, hating how he was born, and struggling to function. (I have bolded examples that I think are especially apt.)

“Why was I born like this? Why does it hurt so much?” / “Why was I born to be me? Why does it hurt so much?”

“Instead you kept calling me “hopeless” / You never called me by my name / You were always comparing me to someone else”

“If I tried and couldn’t say it, you would get angry at me and say “You’re hopeless”” / “When I tried to understand it, you’ll make that disappointed face again”

“I just wanted to be your good boy” (what did the MILGRAM team want us to think when they included this line? likely that he’s childish or ‘hasn’t grown up’, right?)

“Mommy, look / I’ve done great” (calling her ‘mommy’ instead of ‘mom’ – again, ask what the MILGRAM team wants us to think when they included this)

“If only I could do what anyone else could do”

“It’s enough, I am a “disappointment””

“My life started in a wrong spot”

With regards to his relationship with Muu, he doesn’t understand why Muu using him would be a bad thing, or how she is manipulating him. People with ID tend to have poor judgment, and Haruka not being able to tell the difference and not caring about the difference between negative and positive attention shows this (although his trauma definitely also plays a role).

Finally, we have the trial song titles.

We’ve already discussed how “Weakness” is sometimes alternatively misspelled as “Weekness”, and that is because the title in Japanese is, arguably, misspelled, too. The Japanese title is a play on the phrase jakuniku kyoushoku, which is equivalent to the English phrase, “Survival of the fittest.” More directly, it translates to, “The weak are meat, the strong do eat.” The character for “strong” (kyou) is replaced by “together” (also kyou) – with the implication being that Haruka forgot which version of the word was correct for this situation. This also works to create a pun, of sorts, as this makes the title more like, “The weak are meat, communal eating”, creating an emphasis on the fact that there are more people eating than there are ‘weak people’. There are differing ways to interpret this pun, but one way is to view it as a statement on Haruka’s status as a minority, oppressed (‘eaten’) by the majority.

On the other hand, we have All-Knowing and All-Agony. In Japanese, this song title is Zenchi Zennou, which can be translated as “Omniscient and Omnipotent”, used to describe the Christian God. Once again, we have what we can assume is Haruka misspelling the title, creating a pun. One that is much more on the nose, as the character for “ability” (nou) is replaced with the character for “worry, distress, pain” (also nou).

It seems that the reason why Haruka uses new complicated words (aside from the words meaning “idiot” and the like) in All-Knowing and All-Agony is because Muu is teaching him. It features the more complicated “食” (shoku; food), when we know from Haruka’s 2023 birthday portal that Muu is bringing him meals. It also prominently features Muu’s name, 夢 (yume; dream), which is more complicated, as well.

Imagery

Now, we get on to the non-verbal, more visually-based evidence for Haruka’s ID. Be prepared for a lot more images!

Going back to Muu teaching Haruka how to write: it’s not just clear in his usage of kanji, but also how he writes. Comparing his handwriting, it becomes much easier to read after Trial 2’s start, and his writing is soft and bubbly; much like a teen girl’s writing might be.

All of these improvements are able to be linked back to Muu (both his style of writing and in the more complicated words that he knows), who we know is looking after him. Considering this, it’s pretty clear why he sees her like a maternal figure.

One of the Minigram comics shows the prisoners eating curry udon together. Of the four shown (Amane, Haruka, Shidou and Mahiru), Amane and Haruka are the only two who make messes out of their clothes. Since the other two characters in the comic have active roles, and Haruka has the most passive one, Haruka’s inclusion can be assumed to be because he is the only prisoner aside from the child, Amane, who would make a mess while eating.

Childish themes and imagery are seen scattered throughout his MV, as well, especially his first one. He draws with the skill level of a child, which is a very prevalent motif, and he is shown to sleep with a plushie.

Additionally, he seems to have trouble putting on his clothes. He wears two entirely different socks – not just different colors, but also two different lengths. His pant legs are also two different lengths when he tries to roll them up in his Trial 2 art, and he seems to exclusively wear slip-on shoes up until he befriends Muu (where we can presume that she begins helping him, and even then, they're not done properly).

There are various visual parallels drawn between himself as a child and himself as he is now (for example, the way that his clothes are a mix of his current shirt and the vest he wore as a child in All-Knowing and All-Agony), and he often compares himself to a child wanting praise.

Even the violent acts that Haruka is shown committing are also a sign of an ID. People with IDs tend to have meltdowns, and devolve into fits of violence. The reasons for these meltdowns vary depending on the person, but reasons can include anger / frustration (especially in reaction to not being able to communicate well), sensory overload, and confusion.

You may note that Haruka’s mother reacts the exact wrong way for dealing with these meltdowns. When trying to help someone experiencing a meltdown, especially a violent meltdown, the last thing you want to do is appear frightened. The number one piece of advice everyone gives for helping someone experiencing a meltdown is to remain calm. It’s also not advised to leave the person alone, either, because that sends the message, “I want to avoid you when you feel this way.” (Which I suppose, for a neglectful mother like Haruka’s, would be technically accurate, but still not at all helpful.)

It only makes sense that Haruka’s tantrums continue to get worse and worse.

But after the meltdowns fade, he seems to not understand what he’s done. He’s shown experiencing fear and confusion after he hurts something, even shown as his child self at one point. A major part of IDs is being unable to connect actions to consequences.

Finally, we go onto his body language. Frankly, I considered putting, “Imagine this as a real person doing these things and not an anime boy, and you’ll see my point.” Which is true. But I decided to go a little more in depth.

Swaying is heavily associated with people with IDs. This is, in part, because people with IDs have reduced postural balance, and general body balance. Because of that lack of postural balance, people with IDs tend to slump quite heavily, as well. Both of these traits are shown very obviously with Haruka, in All-Knowing and All-Agony.

In the same MV, he’s also shown biting his nails. Like autistic people, people with IDs stim, and this could also be a version of hand mouthing (repetitive contact between the hands and the mouth / tongue), which is also heavily associated with / often seen in intellectually disabled people. He's also shown doing this in promo art.

So, why does this matter?

Haruka being intellectually disabled is a huge part of his story, and, when taking it into consideration, it changes how one views his story a lot.

Haruka being treated better as a child makes more sense with this framework. He wants to return to when he was a child because his level of intellect then was seen as more ‘normal’. There wasn’t as much obviously ‘wrong’ with him yet. Children are expected to be a little slow, but it’s when they remain that way that many parents begin to become concerned. He yearns for when his mother didn’t know he was disabled, and when she treated him better for that reason.

Haruka being severely neglected / abused by his mother would be awful, no matter what, but him being intellectually disabled makes it so much worse. He needs attention and care from his caregivers even more so than the average child does, because he has trouble even functioning on the day-to-day without help. This is why he thrives under Muu’s care; she is meeting his support needs. Likely not perfectly (she’s just a teenage girl, and she is almost certainly not trained or educated in this regard), but even with the amount of support that she is able to give, Haruka is thriving. He’s more confident, he’s learning how to write, and he’s eating more consistently.

Without that care, he struggles so severely that he melts down regularly, going into fits of violence over the fact that his support needs aren’t being met (on top of all of the other emotional baggage that comes with any child being neglected by their parent). Haruka’s mother continued to ignore these cries for attention, for help, for care… Until it went too far.

The way that Haruka’s story is viewed changes drastically with this information. If Haruka was autistic, it would affect very few of the things that I listed. So much of Haruka's story hinges on specifically his intelligence level, not how he socializes. And do you have any idea how many people I’ve seen say, “He’s a neurodivergent with a shitty mom, but so am I, and I didn’t kill anyone about it”? No. If you are not intellectually disabled, you do not get to compare your experiences as if they are equal. If you don’t have an ID, your experiences cannot be compared in this way.

Haruka has a debilitating disability that requires support which he was not getting. He was experiencing ableist abuse at the hands of his mother, and he didn’t know how to handle it. All of his violence happened during his meltdowns, and his disability makes it harder for him to connect his actions to the consequences, or find alternate ways to solve his problems – this is all extremely important information and context when you’re discussing whether or not his crime is forgivable.

If you still don’t forgive him, that’s alright. But to neglect this aspect of his character is, to be frank, baffling, if you’re trying to participate in the spirit of the series and understand everyone’s crime to the fullest extent. And to make jokes, comparing your own experiences to Haruka’s, since you assume him to be neurodivergent and nothing else, does a huge disservice to his story! And, when it’s done to demean him? It honestly comes off a slight bit ableist.

So, I’d like everyone to keep this information in mind moving forward. Don’t infantilize Haruka for his disability. But do consider this information in your analysis posts, your discussions, and so on. I’d like to see this become common knowledge in the MILGRAM fandom, especially since the idea of him being specifically autistic-coded is so widespread by this point.

Thank you!

[tfw-adhd]

hey I think your venn diagrams are great but I was looking through them and got the the autism/adhd/ptsd one and I think there is a big thing missing from it - ptsd (or cptsd) is a *symptom* of autism in a lot of cases, altho ppl don't like to frame it this way bc it requires talking about how often NT ppl traumatize autistic kids regardless of whether they mean to, so imo there should really be something in the empty box of that diagram about sources of trauma being related to autism

Sent Sept ‘22~ (I’m very behind, I know)

Whilst I understand the point you’re trying to make, PTSD isn’t a symptom of Autism. You’re right that Autistic children often end up traumatised due to the way they’re treated, but that’s more of a social link. Autism itself, without the presence of Neurodivergent people being bullied, doesn’t cause PTSD.

I wouldn’t list PTSD as a symptom of Autism for the same reason I wouldn’t list a full fledged Anxiety Disorder as one - Autistic people are a lot more prone to these things and they’re often comorbid, but they’re a completely different diagnosis and not a symptom.

(So no one gets confused by that comparison: Higher than normal levels of anxiety IS a symptom of Autism. However an anxiety disorder is a different diagnosis. While it may be triggered by navigating life as an autistic person, it wouldn’t be symptom, it would just be comorbid.)

[starfishinthedistance]

Why do so many people like...have such an aversion to admitting they might have OCD? Like someone will be talking about OCD symptoms and people will be like "oh I do that but it's because of my autism!" or "oh yeah that's totally me except ADHD lol"

Like...guys I've got news for you.

ASD and ADHD do not cause obsessions or compulsions. They might cause symptoms that look similar (like dependence on routine in ASD or mental hyperactivity in ADHD), but aren't obsessions or compulsions like what's seen in OCD. If you see OCD people describing their inner thought processes and you relate, you can't chalk it up to ASD or ADHD. However ASD and ADHD are highly comorbid with OCD (about 30% for both autism and ADHD), so chances are you just also have OCD. But an autistic or ADHD person without comorbid OCD is not going to have obsessions or compulsions (again, they might have symptoms that resemble them from an outside perspective, but they aren't going to relate to OCD people describing their OCD).

The only other neurodivergencies that can cause obsessions and compulsions are Tourette's and sometimes personality disorders if we're being technical with our definitions (that could be a whole other post because it's complicated).

Like yes there's overlap between neurodivergencies, but they don't cause identical symptoms, and when you look at the internal processing they're easy to tell apart. If you have the exact same internal processing as someone with OCD, chances are you have OCD. There's probably something to be said about recent OCD demonization leading to this aversion, but that can be saved for another time.

Untreated OCD can be really deadly, you aren't going to be able to get better with OCD if you think it's just your autism or ADHD, that's why this is important.

Bottom line is: research whether certain symptoms appear in a disorder before attributing those things to that disorder to avoid misinfo. Because good God this shit has caused a lot of that.

[earthstellar]

A lot of mini-bots (and quite a few other bots) have what might be considered neurodivergent traits (or have been confirmed as such), and I wonder if certain frame types or classes --or Cybertronians in general-- might have physically type-specific processor structures which allow for greater diversity of thought, and if some frame types or spark types might be more or less likely to have or develop neurodivergent traits

We know the Quintessons fucked with the Well of All Sparks in the Aligned Continuity which had unknown effects, and in IDW 1 given the spark as the core of a person's individual spirit (for lack of any better phrasing), it would make sense for Cybertronian sparks to imbue individual personality etc. while the processors are physical hardware with software flexibility to permit and adapt to those unique aspects of self

For example, in the continuities where spark development influences protoform development and therefore what type of frame a bot might ultimately have, it is still simultaneously possible to alter a frame to some degree with armour changes, mass manipulation, etc. (and in most continuities, alt-modes can be altered as well, to at least some degree within the range of someone's core specs)

But the processor and spark are the two things that generally (although we have seen some exceptions to this) cannot be physically altered without incurring significant damage-- Making them some of the few constant components in a species designed to physically change

Sparks have significant individual variation in terms of the personality etc. that evolves from each unique spark, so perhaps processors have some physical elements designed to best accommodate a certain frame type, while also allowing for individual experiences and perception etc. to form unique thought pathways for each individual -- This would allow for any Quintesson or Functionism-related frame alterations or requirements, while also still enabling a spark to produce a unique person as it forms and as experiences accumulate

Sort of like genetics vs epigenetics in human beings; Some things are physical and structural, but some things are informed by environment, experience, etc.

It's interesting that we do seem to see a lot of mini-bots specifically who might fall into a neurodivergent category or exhibit behaviours or thought process that might reasonably fall under the category, but of course it's not universal so there is still greater variation

Although characterisation varies from series to series, here's a couple examples:

Cliffjumper tends to have impulse control problems that are sometimes similar to ADHD impulse control problems, and he sometimes has difficulty prioritising or hyperfixates on one aspect of a situation, leading him to reach the wrong conclusion or focusing on the slightly wrong thing; He also struggles to manage frustration. This could all be related to something similar to executive dysfunction, as it commonly manifests in humans with ADHD.

Bumblebee seems to be conflict-avoidant to some degree in most continuities, and aside from that being part of his friendly nature and kind disposition, it might also hint at something similar to rejection sensitive dysphoria, or a greater sensitivity and emotional response to perceived interpersonal conflict or perceived failure. Some versions of Bumblebee have particularly struggled when faced with high stakes/high risk of failure scenarios, and he has a tendency to internalise blame, directing it towards himself even when a failure is not necessarily his fault or even truly a failed mission. This is often comorbid with Autism and ADHD in humans, but it can also exist on its own.

It's not just mini-bots; Misfire canonically has ADHD in IDW 1, Geomotus in IDW 2 is Autistic and his neurodivergency is even highlighted by other characters, and so on.

So all of this (and how it might work) varies from continuity to continuity, but I just like thinking about how neurodivergent bots do exist, and how that happens and how it manifests and how it is perceived by others and by society at large is interesting

In IDW 2, neurodivergency seems to be viewed in a more understanding and positive light. But in IDW 1, neurodivergency may be viewed in a more ableist way under the Functionist system, and in the Aligned Continuity, perhaps neurodivergency is seen as a potential indication of Quintesson alteration of the Well or of the individual themselves (this would depend on a bot's age).

We don't have too many details on Cybertronian medicine in general, but it's interesting to think about!

It's 8 AM I'm gonna go have a tea now lol

[rin-and-jade]

Damn it, Back to Square One: A Post about Skill Regression

It's like how that one time you had an interest to practice a cool trick for impressing people, and you're fully committed until it was pulled off perfectly, only to be performed once before its forgotten for a good while.. Yet, when you thought of going back to that well-practiced trick, it barely replicated the results that was from the previous attempt.

How? You perfectly knew how to do it inside your mind, but your hands failed to perform otherwise. Which means being forgetful wasn't the culprit, but to how our brains store these learnt skills--or behaviors. This is an example of skill regression, let's learn more!

TLDR fast pass: AVAILABLE

What was that?!

That setback? - oh, not to shock you with it being a real thing, here's the general definition of it:

"A phenomenon which entails gradual or abrupt loss of previously acquired skills." - PubMed Central

Yikes, um, nevermind. That DOES sound like a shocking problem... but yes, to put it simply, this regression can be regular or abrupt depending on the circumstances that triggers it. Skill regression also can manifest as temporary or permanent loss of any skills, too.

By the way, everyone can experience this type of regression, though for those who are neurodivergent,, they actually risk skill regressing 5x more than a normal person would, double freaking out right now? Save your screams, i haven't said it is doom's day with no cure.

Then why,, why?

im not telling. Just kidding,,

Here's where thing's get complicated.. There's two common neurodivergence, and those two divergence have fully different reasons why a skill regression was triggered. Isn't this wonderful--you're going to read longer than you'd expect now. (Ha! But knowledge is power.) I'll attempt to keep it as concise though;

Those with ADHD, this is why you got setback:

Stress - it can impede how well you perform or think, causing a temporary regression. Tasks that are usually effortless now takes double the amount of effort to achieve the same result.

Unfamiliarity - You might've practiced singing in your own personal home, the unique atmosphere, and audience who resides in that abode feels like a default setting due to exposure and repetition. So, if you were to do it outside in public, or a stage, the sense of anxiety and zero preparation in a different setting causes your brain to simply.. short circuit. It's temporary though.

Executive Dysfunction - because of how it impairs many other processes such as planning, action, memory, and focus,, these impairments can severely impact how you apply the learnt skills to reality. This is a comorbid-related default reason for regression.

Those with Autism, this is why you got setback:

Overstimulation - sensory disruptions and overwhelm can cause an imbalance in cognitive function, it's like how a computer lags from the sheer amount of information and causing all necessary operations to a halt. This is temporary, upon retreating from stressor.

Unpredictability - routine and stability is where people with ASD function at peak, obstacles that got caught up in the way breaks this flow of mind, as if a train had derailed from it's tracks. Depending on if it is solvable or not, it can be temporary or permanent regression.

Inconsistency - Skills need to be practiced, and often require repetition to further ingrain it. Without it, you would have difficulty applying to different contexts or even worse, fail to create a solid neural pathway and decayed. It can vary from temporary or permanent regression.

Other conditions that cause skill regression:

Neurogenerative diseases such as Alzheimer or Parkinson

Brain damage

Psychological disorders such as depression, OCD, Schizophrenia

Nutrient deficiencies that impact brain function

Withdrawal side effects

Stress

The issue complicates even further when you have other conditions, and/or have ADHD and Autism at the same time. This causes higher chances of overlapping and potential stressors that triggers the regression.

How is this system related?

I promise this post is also related to systemhood, but the basics on this phenomenon still has to be taught so you and i are on the same page. This has been sufficient, so let's finally get to the point of this post!

Right, this is where the questions start flooding, "why do alters have different proficiency?" "why are some unaffected, yet others are susceptible?", and other kinds. Let me go straight to the point.

Alters retain different memories, and they don't get to choose what they remember. These memories can be explicit or implicit information:

Implicit - Where actions are unconsciously adapted and performed, needing no conscious awareness or effort. Automatic. E.g. riding a bike, writing, holding cutlery.

Explicit - Where actions require active recall and thinking in order to be performed. Manual. E.g. math multiplication, reading comprehension, speaking (needs vocabulary)

Skill regression can impact two main aspects such as:

Your social skills - how you pronounce, how to start speaking, or how you use the words, or stay engaged in a conversation

Your motor skills - how you do independent actions, how well is your rough and soft skills, or muscle memory

And sometimes, you can have both skills impacted

Which means.. what the part remembers, can also impact different kinds of regression it will be susceptible too. For those who have shared skills but cannot perform as good, or at all, compared to the proficient alter, this regression is natural due to the dissociative element.

Something feels wrong..

What was that? You just had a realization which unintentionally causes you to function worser than ever without the skills returning?

It seems like you learnt to do things when masking. It basically means when you are used to living in a tight little box, and finally got out of it,, it is more difficult to fit in there again which conveys the strain in upkeeping the skills you had learnt previously.

The purpose of masking is to function on a daily basis to avoid conflict or negative experiences,, it can be as simple as conforming to the norm of "eye contact when talking" or alternatively it is how you cope while being unaware of your condition (such as baring uncomfortable textures, thinking everyone feels that way)

Problem here is, because it feels wrong/unaddressed yet it keeps you going, it will take more energy the longer you upkeep these skills in a masked state as the core issue wasn't tackled. This will slowly bring you to a burnout. So when you realize that this isn't the norm, your mind just drops everything on the ground in relief as its silently detrimental to your health, no matter how convinced you it is helpful.

This is a permanent skill regression caused by any kinds of exhaustion.

Things won't go back to normal?!

Sadly... no. Good news is, you can always build a new framework!

Though, you will be immediately greeted with a problem: hypersensitivity.

After realizing and being aware of the situation, the accumulated stress, and any other factors that comes into play,, being overwhelmed would happen in a daily basis when left unaddressed, so make sure to minimize the sensory/emotional stressors and pay attention to any heightened senses. Also incorporate regulation tools, since if emotions were suppressed when masking, unmasking means releasing these pent-up feelings, making emotions more intense than usual.

Burnout is not normal exhaustion too, so refrain from overexerting yourself and implement lots and lots of rest.

From here on, it will be easier to re-learn everything from the start, and specifically in ways that accommodates your needs. It takes plenty of time in order to see results, if you need any help in this aspect, you are always free to reach out to me or search for any resources regarding this.

Another reminder for yourself, this type of skill regression also cause other symptoms such as trouble focusing, poor memory, and overall difficulty in doing regular tasks as it feels taxing.

Last notes

Okay my bad, you must've expected that alters are involved with skill regression due to CDD's--but apparently, it is closer to neurodivergent experiences that manifested in systemhood.

What are your thoughts on this? I was surprised myself, were you too? Let me know what's interesting in this post so far, and other questions you might have!

- j

--

TLDR

What is Skill Regression?

Skill regression is the loss of previously acquired skills, either temporarily or permanently.

More common in neurodivergent individuals (e.g., ADHD, autism).

Causes of Skill Regression:

ADHD:

Stress: Impairs performance.

Unfamiliarity: New settings cause anxiety.

Executive Dysfunction: Affects planning and memory.

Autism:

Overstimulation: Sensory overload disrupts function.

Unpredictability: Routine disruptions cause setbacks.

Inconsistency: Lack of practice leads to skill decay.

Other Conditions That Cause Skill Regression:

Neurodegenerative diseases (Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s)

Brain damage

Psychological disorders (depression, OCD, schizophrenia)

Nutrient deficiencies

Withdrawal side effects

Stress

Skill Regression in Systems:

Alters may have different skill levels due to varied memories and experiences.

Dissociative elements can naturally cause skill regression.

Addressing Skill Regression:

Build new frameworks tailored to your needs.

Minimize stressors and incorporate regulation tools.

Ensure plenty of rest to avoid burnout.

Skill regression is more correlated to neurodivergence which in return affects system experiences, rather than where being a system causes skill regression.

[kerubimcrepin]

Live-read: The Wheel of Destiny #1, Atcham.

You can find this article on the Dofus MMO’s site, by simply googling it.

Before I begin this post I want to acknowledge multiple things:

On the hierarchy of canonical media, web articles are like... the bottom of the barrel. I already suspected this, but season 4 fully retconning Eva's parents from the lore articles sealed the deal. For this reason, take these as nothing but the sort of canon that will get retconned at the first available opportunity.

I recently found out that the Wheel of Destiny 8, the one about Kerubim, seems to use stolen fanart by Flowerimh, which is sad. I don't know where else to put this, because I don't want to make a separate post about this. Flowerimh isn't even active anymore...

Despite these two things, let us proceed to read this article together:

So, this article happens anywhere from one year to a decade before Joris was born, and at this time, Atcham and Julith were already acquainted and spending free time together.

Spoiler alert: They are searching for Kerubim.

Keke getting called a "precious runt" is on par with the shit Joris gets called. Wonderful. I do wonder why they would search for him in Brakmar. Someone confused him for Atcham? Maybe they asked Kerubim himself, and he didn't want to deal with them, and so, sent them to Brakmar on a wild goose chase?

I will not be asking "what did he do" because, like, Fifi Pretty Calves exists. He has enough enemies to have a price on his head.

I am literally in love with him, and every single way he is described in this part of the text.

"He had a preference for sibilant sounds", "Aw, poor little puppy", "the only reason he hadn't robbed them blind is because he wanted to know more".

He was so excited.... he thought they wanted him (not carnally).... 😢

He takes a lot of pride in his work and insane behaviours.

Atcham considers himself an extraordinary adventurer and a valiant fighter. AND HE ISSSSSS. But it is interesting that besides being a killer for hire, he probably also adventures.

[Taps this meme I made about Kerubim and Atcham once again]

He was so ready to be the one people wanted to kill just once, and they ruined his whole fucking evening.

Imagine this being your day-to-day life, for decades. Just people laughing at you, laughing because you still hadn't caught on that you're the joke, and laughing when you finally understand that, and get upset.

Laughing about you behind your back, to some random stranger, too. Because they still hadn't realized they're literally talking about him.

I think this is a good time to say that I headcanon Atcham as autistic. It is simply a headcanon, but one rooted in the themes of his character. I think it is a fitting conclusion, (albeit, just like my hcs of Joris having ADHD and OCD and Kerubim having comorbid BPD and HPD, very accidental one, on part of the writers).

I could talk for hours on the way neurodivergence, disability, body issues, and violence-as-response-to-abuse intersect in Atcham's character, — or the way he hates everyone preemptively, because he knows that they will probably hurt him, yet still tries to be at least a bit kind and fair to others (....who aren't Kerubim).

I am probably not autistic, — however, I am neurodivergent, and I love & relate to him, so yeah. Always rotating this bingus in my brain.

Imagine this being your whole life.

I read descriptions of Atcham being cool and fast, and all the analysis leaves my brain as I say "awooga hummina hummina".

The fact that nobody ever wed him is literally so unrealistic, like WHAT DO YOU MEAN you don't want the weird, mentally ill, neurodivergent twink.

We never see Atcham's home in Brakmar, but from the description of "tattered", and the way his bed looks in the comic panel I inserted earlier in the post, it is safe to say his home is the definition of "girlrotting". It probably smells. Bad.

Says the woman whose kindness will also be the death of her, — and her ruthlessness too.

Because of her visiting his home so nonchalantly, and their interactions as a whole, I like to view Atcham and Julith as somewhat close friends, — as close as two very emotionally repressed people, who have a huge age difference, and don't like to admit that they feel anything positive, can be.

He probably didn't mourn her, — not after she was presumed dead for ten years, and not after she died for real.

But he probably still thinks about her, once in a while.

[manyminded]

reasons I probably have autism (non exhaustive list, I’m rlly sleepy rn but insomnia is kicking my ass)

special interests - to my understanding, they last longer and the things u r interested in are broader. the poster child for my sp/ins is the osc, a genre, which I have been heavily invested in for over a year. (side note: they feel a lot like hyperfixations, almost identical for me, but sp/ins last way longer. most hyperfixes, for me, last up to [but usually less than] 3 months.)

adhd and autism are comorbidities

while it’s hard to tell if you know me, I definitely struggle with social cues. I can read them well; but presenting them myself is hard. my mom always told me to stop talking to myself, I over share all the time, I ‘talk out of turn’, etc etc

even though I can READ social cues/rules I have a general disregard for them; I tend to think they’re stupid and bad. (one example is I refuse to shave my legs and care very little for skin care)

i was always “a pleasure to have in class”, and while that isn’t usually a sign of autism, I’ll tell you why it could be in me. I never knew what could get me in trouble, and the rsd I have makes me want to avoid that as much as possible - so I become over complacent, afraid to test boundaries and avoiding any slight danger to my “goodie two shoes” life.

almost all of my friends are autistic, or have some other flavor of neurodivergency. we come in packs. we can sniff each other out, man. (side note: in online spaces, I usually end up in primarily autistic communities, almost always on accident. it comes with the overlap of most communities I’m in that, while not inherently linked to autism, have a big portion of their members be autistic.)

A little related to the previous point - I can almost always tell when someone is autistic if I’ve hung out with them like, 2-3 times. It’s not even conscious it’s just an instinct of like “oh hey another of my kin. hello 👋” Yk?

sensory issues. I’ve always been a “texture girl,” especially when it comes to food - I have been a “picky eater” for most of my life (although that has started to lessen over the years.) and while sensory issues aren’t inherently autistic, they are closely linked.

the fact I’m writing this at all, tbh. no neurotypical would do this I don’t think

I always get really fucking mad when ppl are ableist, especially in the context of autism. but maybe that’s the other disabilities talking idk (the memory of kids saying “don’t make jokes about being autistic when you aren’t diagnosed!” and rolling my eyes because Have You Met Me)

tbh creature

there’s probably more but I’m sleepy and mostly writing this to spite my mother bcuz she insists I’m not autistic. for some unknown reason. idk man

[fudan-no-nijiiro]

UtaPri and Neurodivergent Headcanons: Yamato Hyuga

This might become a series at some point, because I think it's really interesting.

That said, I want to start out with a few disclaimers:

I am not an expert in psychology.

No identity category is a monolith. That holds especially true for neurodiverse folks; it is a huge and incredibly varied umbrella.

No UtaPri characters, to my knowledge, have a canonical formal medical diagnosis.

UtaPri is a Japanese franchise, and I am not Japanese. All sorts of intercultural misunderstandings may come into play, here.

It is entirely possible that others will find some or all of UtaPri's representations of neurodivergence and/or mental illness unimpressive, inaccurate, and/or upsetting; these are just my opinions as one fan. I'm truly just here to have a good time, and I'm also fully open to disagreements with my perspective or analysis.

That said, let's move on to Yamato!

Yamato Hyuuga and ADHD (+ possible dyslexia/other learning disabilities)

Yamato shows an impressively wide range of traits common among people with ADHD. In no particular order, there's:

Physical movement as self-regulation: Yamato regularly walks around on his hands, goes out running, and generally finds ways to move his body when given half a chance. He often flips onto his hands in the anime, and mentions fitting in runs whenever he can in Live Emotion.

Special interest in exercise: Yamato regularly tries to share what he knows with his peers, both as a way to bond with them and to help improve their fitness. According to the audio dramas, he goes training with Eiji to help him build his confidence; according to Live Emotion, he keeps up on different brands of protein powder. The first chapters of the "private stories" in Live Emotion involve instructing The Player/Haruka in the finer points of sportsware. In fairness, UtaPri tends to define its boys by their hobbies, but even given that, Yamato jumps more directly into a "teaching" mode than most of the other characters.

Struggles with sudden, intense emotions: Yamato's mood changes rapidly in a way he struggles to control, but he also returns to baseline more quickly than most people would. Anyone who's seen his episodes in the anime will have an idea of what I'm talking about here—his explosions towards Syo, which (deservedly) did little to endear him to the fandom, are the main thing I'm thinking of here. There's already been a reference to this in the early chapters in the main story: Yamato's mood is ruined in a split second by Cecil bringing up his brother, though he manages to hide the depth of the problem and not explode this time. There are a lot of possible alternative explanations for this too, in fairness, such as PTSD; more information about what happened with his brother would help to make things clearer. But emotional volatility is also a trait associated with ADHD in some cases.

Struggles with studying/mental labor: One of the main story chapters in Live Emotion involves Yamato struggling with ideas for lyrics, and the way that he tries to apply himself, rapidly gets frustrated, gives up, leaves, and then gets his idea (by engaging in his special interest!) really stood out to me as a relatable ADHD moment. In the Maji Love Kingdom audio drama, he goes out of his way to attempt to hide these difficulties in this area by insisting on working alone, which shows that this is a struggle he's all too aware of.

This struggle hints at possible comorbid learning disabilities—most likely dyslexia, though there are other potential explanations. A few details in support of this:

Trouble with reading: One of the repeated dialogues in Live Emotion, as well as a detail in at least one of the audio dramas, involves that there are a lot of kanji Yamato has trouble reading. (Bonus fun fact: Japanese dyslexia and English dyslexia are at least partially separate conditions! Some folks have one and not the other, independent of their first language. It's wild, but also given how different the writing systems are, it also makes sense. Yamato is shown sounding out words in English in Live Emotion, which I thought was a great moment, but either way it's unclear whether he experiences different levels of difficulty in Japanese and English.)

Trouble with writing: In the Maji Love Kingdom drama, Yamato is shown struggling with composition (coming up with what to write), and vocabulary (he ends up needing a lot of help from a dictionary and his unit partners to come up with his lyrics. Tokiya and Cecil were such a good team to help him with this!! "Kaleidoscope" was awesome for many reasons).

In addition, the franchise's commitment to the bit regarding Yamato's handwriting is impressive as well. Here's one of his birthday messages, for instance:

I thought at first that it was just because my Japanese wasn't great that I was struggling to read his writing, but I've also seen Japanese fans on social media scratching their heads over parts of his writing in the past. Not only that, his handwriting has been mentioned in canon (mainly HEAVENS Radio, if I'm remembering right?), with Nagi in particular complaining that his writing is often indecipherable.

There is no way to be sure, but to me, this combination of traits reads as an intentional depiction of ADHD and/or learning disabilities by at least some of the writers or character designers, even if it has not been named as such explicitly by the franchise (which, to my knowledge, it hasn't).

However, more than any particular character details, the overall arcs Yamato is involved in, and in particular the thoughtful way in which they're structured, that I find most meaningful. Yamato often says things that are openly brash, antagonistic, and/or unintentionally harsh to the people around him. However, the stories he's in follow through on this beyond the initial interaction: we find out afterwards why he's behaving this way (in the sense of his motivations, his struggles that were not visible at first, and so on). Then we get to see him reflect, either by himself or with the help of his teammates, and understand what went wrong. And finally, he often has a chance to revisit the situation with people he's clashed with, and find a more constructive resolution together with them.

I myself have been diagnosed with ADHD, although in my case, it's mostly inattentive type, and I mask it pretty effectively in my daily life. Still, I have a few of these traits: I can instruct others endlessly on my special interests, I get sudden flashes of temper, and I get easily frustrated by "simple" things in a way that can be difficult for others to understand or empathize with. These traits are ones I often feel guilt and shame about.

Yamato's strong personality is often on display for all to see, and it would be easy to turn him into a caricature or even just a villain. But instead, we get insights into his perspective, see him grow and overcome difficulties, and are shown time and again that he cares about the people around him and wants to learn to work with them better. Yamato makes me feel more confident in myself: however different I am from the people around me, and whatever mistakes I make, if I can stay brave and open-hearted, I can keep learning to be better than I was before.

[cascadianights]

"Mental illness and neurodivergence aren't a physical disability" for SOME minority of people that is true! For the rest MAJORITY of people you're spreading the same gaslighting the worst doctors do when they tell you to exercise your way out of crippling anxiety!

"The brain isn't an organ/isn't part of the body" Wrong! I don't know how else to explain this!!! Wrong!!!!!!

"Mental illness/neurodivergence doesn't affect the body or physical ability" Are you??? A real person who's lived on this planet??? Are you being fucking for real with this??? Neurotransmitters and hormones affect EVERY SYSTEM IN THE BODY - in a panic attack your digestion is shut OFF, your whole body is burning energy and going through extreme duress. Depression and fatigue come hand in hand, and not because it's "all in your head." Not being able to leave your apartment for a week due to agoraphobia or schizophrenia affects every single part of your mental and physical health. Not being able to eat for a week because of exteme nausea (physical) from anxiety leads to the same shitty symptoms as if you couldnt due to not being able to physically prep the food (also something that happens with severe mental illness). Not being able to be in the moment or focus because of OCD and intense intrusive thoughts, not being able to concentrate enough to even read or process what's happening, you think those things don't in turn effect hormones and neurotransmitters and how you FEEL and how much energy you have remaining after being on high alert using every square inch of focus just to understand a conversation and communicate? You don't think emotional pain compounds and adds to physical pain and vice versa??? You don't think there's a reason Autism and ADHD have a million physical comorbidities that can be directly connected to living in a state of constant stress, organs shut down, brain and other organs in your body literally not producing the right chemicals or functions - IBS, CFS, stroke, heart attack, diabetes. Why can some of you understand being black or trans in America leads to direct physical health issues and Disability from the constant stress and gatekeeping and lack of resources, but not YOUR LITERAL ORGANS MALFUNCTIONING AND ORDERING EVERY OTHER SYSTEM IN YOUR BODY TO DO SO AS WELL????

The brain is an organ. The brain is one of many many systems affected and interconnected in mental illness/neurodivergence. Severe mental illness and neurodivergence are a full body disability. Full stop. Period. Excluding us is to exclude parts of yourself, it's cutting off the parts of yourself the doctors gaslit about your disorders in order to feel better, it's lateral violence, it's a false barrier since if many of us didn't start w "real physical disabilities" we will have them as a direct result of our mental ones within years. It's nothing but a way to falsely separate yourself from mentally ill and neurodivergent people, and WHY ARE YOU SO ///DESPERATE/// TO DO THAT??? What of those reasons don't come down to self hate or hate at the way doctors and others treated you or just fucking petty intergroup violence you refuse to accept as such based on an author from 50 years ago and some salty Opinions on other people's lived fucking experiences?

Nevermind how many people with mental illness and neurodivergence have other major physical disabilities and try to find community, and are greeted with constant constant separation and DNIs and assumptions? Literal attacks on people with mental illness cast as activism. Do you think your petty divide is WORTH the thousands of people seeing and feeling that immediate rejection of a place that should welcome them w open arms? "They talk over us" HOW MUCH OF THE TIME ARE YOU BLAMING AUTISTICS FOR BEING ANNOYING AND NOT READING THE ROOM INSTEAD OF YOU OR A MODERATOR COMMUNICATING??? AND HOW CAN YOU TALK OVER PEOPLE AT THE SAME LEVEL AS YOU???? Its false fucking dichotomies and lateral aggression and turning the harm done to you on others. That's it. I'm tired of people pretending it's flat out anything else.

[midfight-artchive]

Hello!! It's been a while and I feel like I should explain why I've been gone for so long despite the blog working on a queue system. The short answer is mental health stuff, the long answer is below.

What's important is that the blog will now officially be on hiatus until further notice. When I come back, I'm going to overhaul how I do things behind the scenes that will hopefully bring more of the archive to you without tiring me out as much. Thank you for understanding, and again a more full explanation is below.

I've been going through probably the worst mental state I've ever been in lately. Nothing to do with the blog itself thankfully, I'm very passionate about this blog and MFM as a whole to this day, but the circumstances I'm currently in make it difficult to run this blog.

You know the saying "it gets worse before it gets better?" I'm basically going through that, fully realizing my traumas and really putting myself under a microscope to pick out what needs to be healed and improved. Things are looking up for me overall, but the amount of mental strain and exhaustion I'm experiencing can't be understated either. (Not to mention the fact that I'm still in the situation that gave me this trauma in the first place, so healing is a little difficult when I'm being retraumatized pretty much constantly... x_x) Said exhaustion makes it very hard to even fill the queue for this blog, let alone have the energy to answer asks or even tag sometimes. It's rough! This blog isn't demanding by any means and it's still too much to even think about. (And I have thought about it a lot!!! I've wanted to come back numerous times but didn't because of the constant fatigue I've been feeling.)

Part of that is because I'm neurodivergent, though, and MFM hasn't been a hyperfixation of mine for YEARS. In fact, I haven't had a solid hyperfixation since about...2019-2020? Since then I've been coasting along on special interests and even my focus on those have lasted shorter and shorter the longer time has gone on. I started this blog way after MFM was in my brainspace full time, which is why it took over a year to even set up. I felt that the premise was more important than my brain's shenanigans, though, so I pushed through and tried my best to keep it up. The sad truth is that I don't think about MFM as much as I used to, and when I do think of them these days it's more of a "damn, I really miss them...." for a few minutes before my brain goes back to whatever it's currently grabbed hold of. It's not my choice, as many people with hyperfixations know, and trust me when I say that if I could keep them in my focus long enough to keep this blog running I would in a heartbeat. The fact that this is comorbid with depression really means I have to scrap for whatever energy I can, and that means focusing on things that actively bring me joy just so I can have enough energy to get out of bed, meaning even a fun side project isn't as possible as I previously thought.

HOWEVER, NOT ALL HOPE IS LOST!!! I've started medication and as I've said, I'm working to better myself. This blog going on the backburner is me taking a break, NOT a cancellation, and when I come back I promise to be better about not disappearing for random stretches of time. :P I can't say exactly when I'll feel well enough to pick this blog back up, but it absolutely will happen.

Thank you all so much for the positive reception to this blog, and I'm looking forward to continue archiving for you all!!

[mintacle]

Jason Todd as a character that neurodivergents relate to because of how neurodiversity and childhood abuse/neglect are strongly linked.

It's the feeling of not being understood despite your needs making sense and being reasonable but being constantly told you are unreasonable because you operate on a different system. It's the way YOU can absolutely create the environment that allows you to function and feel good if only people fucking let you instead of standing in your way all the time, lecturing you not only how you SHOULD be doing things, but also why your different ways of operating show that you are insufficient, a liability, incapable, hysteric, etc, etc, never-ending list of putting you down just for being different instead of other's trying to working together. It's about being in the minority against a system where the majority supports and agrees that you are unreasonable.

So no, I don't think Jason's different understanding and approach to justice is unreasonable and has no value in existing. I don't think that him disagreeing with Bruce means he must be wrong and I don't think that he is wrong just because the majority of bat-vigilantes work and think differently. seeing the world differently and being seen differently is relatable to those of us with neurodiversity. Lack of recognition of our neurodiversity and/or trauma (at least one of which definitely applies to Jason, but I would argue both) is so often the basis of abuse that people suffer in childhood or even in adulthood.

So to me it's so relatable that the other bats don't hear Jason out and don't understand him. it's the experience of victims, the experience of Neurodigervents and the experience of the huge overlap area, that people do not eve CONSIDER regarding you as objective and reasonable. Consider you anything other than a problem to fix and say that you need their help because you don't know what is best for yourself. Regardless of comorbidity, PTSD and C-PTSD are also part of the neurodiversity umbrella. So it applies, it fucking applies that people with neurodiversity flock to Jason and recognize themselves in him.

[liketwoswansinbalance]

Is Rafal an Allegory for Autism and Is He Autistic Himself?

DISCLAIMER: This is just one niche interpretation of the text that points to his being autistic, even if it were not intentionally written into the narrative. I am in no way claiming this interpretation is factual or that it is an absolute or “correct” reading of the text.

Therefore, feel free to disagree with me or add onto this! I will not be offended by opposing viewpoints at all, and it could be fair to say I’m just pathologizing him, if that’s the case, which may be true. I’d also love to hear other takes if anyone agrees with me, or suspects another form of neurodivergence, seeing as comorbidities are possible and one condition doesn’t rule out the existence of another as symptoms alone could themselves be attributed to other causes.

@hyperfixating-chic Thank you for bringing up the idea of Rafal having autism since I had previously suspected it due to some of his (potentially negligible) traits, and discarded the idea. Now, I see it as plausible and your thought about masking definitely helped everything else slot into place!

Currently, I'm straddling the line between:

Is Rafal an unintentional allegory for autism, or beyond that, does he have enough traits for him to actually be autistic?

With him, any traces of autism seem to present themselves in such minor ways that I might just be cherry-picking evidence to fit this particular image of him. Though, his autism could just be higher-functioning anyway. And, while he does have seemingly autistic traits, there could be other, equally plausible reasons for their existence apart from neurodivergence, such as his idiosyncratic personality. And, because he is fictional, we can’t truly be sure.

One side note: The word “autism” could be translated as “selfism,” as the prefix “auto-” means “self,” or it could allude to self-absorption. Yet, not all autistics are selfish and some may only appear “selfish” to others. However, this interpretation of the word happens to work in favor of Rafal’s autism existing, as he is selfish (and does possess a somewhat graceless mode of socializing).

⸻

Evidence for his character being an allegory:

He's central to the order of the world he lives in, to the Schools running, continuing on, to pure utility, but does he have any social value beyond that?

Quick digression: I'm almost tempted to say that the worst thing someone whose opinion Rafal actually cares about could say to him is: “You're useless/purposeless." (And that is what I have him think about, or say at times, to Rhian, but if it were directed toward him, I feel like it would be something he couldn't brush off easily.)

Looking at his “value” and other traits:

He has virtually no relationships and thus, has little social currency apart from his School Master status.

He is viewed as an outsider in a sense by society (partly because of how far above everyone else he stations himself). But, if he didn’t do that as well as threaten punishment so frequently, would he be ridiculed behind closed doors? Even though he was admitted to the Black Rabbit, it was (probably?) because he was respected and feared, not because he was “welcome” in an amicable way, even if he was treated well. How do we know he wasn’t merely tolerated because he had to be, according to social conventions or mandated politeness driven by fear? Albeit, some Nevers probably did actually idolize him.

I believe there was even an assumption by others that he had a purpose for being at the nightclub, that he was there strictly for business, to scout out prospective students, not necessarily because he was there to join the festivities. Though, I may be misremembering.

He is irreverent and a “killjoy” to some, often upsets the status quo on large (leaving the School) and small (the trainwreck at the Snow Ball) scales, and often questions things usually accepted by most. He also doesn’t respect any authority apart from his own. This again is due to his Evil, in-narrative, as Evers are commonly depicted as rule-followers and traditionalists. (Neurotypicals, those who aren’t neurodivergent, generally do not question implicit social rules, even when there is no reason to keep to them or no reason for their existence.)

Rafal might only have been valued for his tangible, quantifiable contributions to society, as both a Never of prodigious talents and as an individual with a high-standing.

That begs the question: what about him as a person?

He is broadly viewed as unlikable.

To play into allegory, he is dehumanized, not necessarily for potential autism, but for his Evil, if it could be seen as a symbol of his autism.

At the start, Rhian, in originally wanting to eradicate Evil from the Woods and reform every soul, inadvertently demonizes him. And so do his students, when they sentence him to prison.

Sometimes, in-world, the Pen dehumanizes him (as well as Rhian) for his position as School Master. It reduces him to his role, strips him of individuality and selfhood because he is one of an indivisible pair, and it views him as replaceable, which, again, relates heavily to utility above all else, in how his sole purpose for being there and having his life preserved is pushing the tales and future forward.

So, while yes, he is respected and valued and held up as an exemplar for what Evil should be, how deeply does others’ approval run? Was anyone in-world willing to vouch for him or defend him as a person, for personal traits, apart from his skills and achievements?

(I’m not trying to suggest this in poor taste, but a real-world example of this phenomenon happening historically is the moral quandary of saving Einstein, who might've been neurodivergent. Einstein’s singular life as a Jew was prioritized over other lives, a plurality, during the Holocaust because he was a genius and therefore, a person of value. And, to generalize, sometimes groups only claim unlikable or "inferior" individuals as one of their own because they can benefit and get ahead from doing so. For instance, a Nazi could rationalize something absurd and say: "Oh, that Jew. He's a personal friend of mine. He's an exception, not like all those others. He's a good guy, and so, I'll help him escape Germany." Any “loyalty” from a member of the in-group is conditional. The moment that person of value crosses a line or becomes useless, it’s “abandon ship!” Or worse, denial: "They were never that great in the first place!")

Initially, to Rafal's students, he was a Folk devil, or their chosen scapegoat, even if their accusations against him proved pretty valid later on with the torture. (So, admittedly, he is deserving of a lot the narrative did to him, and can’t be defended completely.)

In fact, both Rafal’s own students and Vulcan (importantly designated as Rafal’s competition) seemed perfectly happy to see him fall. Thus, we can ask: did he suffer from a case of Tall Poppy Syndrome?

For reference, here’s a definition of the term I’ve pulled from the internet:

“Tall Poppy Syndrome occurs when individuals are attacked, resented, criticized, or cut down due to their achievements and success. The metaphorical ‘tall poppy’ represents someone who stands out from the crowd, excels, and reaches new heights.”

Maybe, he was only ever valued, not for who he was, but for what he could bring into the world.

Even if anyone post-Fall suspected that Rhian was the “Rafal” they saw, maybe they truly didn’t care. They still had a “him” in a sense that must have seemed just as good and serviceable as the original—if, again, they only valued him for the sake of utility.* It probably didn’t matter because no one was suffering from a lack of Evil School Master (yes, just the title, not the name) and likely no one realized they were suffering from a lack of Rafal (and balance). Him as a person probably meant nothing in their eyes, considering how he used and abused them.

So, here we have a figure, who was never that personable to begin with, who only succeeded in further alienating himself from potential allies and friends as stakes rose, who excelled in other areas rather than socially.

Could he have used his sorcery and other preternatural, prodigy-like abilities (considering his mental/physical age, if not his chronological age) to compensate for his ever-present social deficit? Possibly.

*Thus, we might be able to confirm he was always viewed, not for who he was, but for what he could do.

His death was caused by the failure to say the right, emotionally-weighted words in an emotionally-charged situation.

⸻

Evidence for being autistic himself:

His default mode of speaking appears to be deadpan with little intonation and his emotional expression is overall low. He’s also rather impassive and placid compared to other characters as long as he remains in control and isn’t taken by surprise. Thus, I suspected he could have a flat affect (or blunted affect), unless he is deliberately seducing or appealing to another character he intends to manipulate to his own ends.

He has irreverence for existing traditions or established ways of doing things, given how he changed the date of the Snow Ball without warning, without consulting anyone, and with little concern for others because he saw his decision as fit to serve himself.

He seems to have a case of one-track-mind or monotropism when it comes to saving Rhian or attaining power for himself at any cost. His narrowed, obsessive focus tends to center on either Rhian, vengeance, the balance, or gaining control over his immediate surroundings whenever he is incapacitated; he has a need for order and control in everything he approaches. He also has a strong internal sense of justice, however perversely-aligned his may be.

He doesn’t distribute his attention widely, and (once) seemed to love his brother deeply and narrowly. He had no friends outside of Rhian, his twin, which could’ve been a given since the start. He had difficulty maintaining all of his relationships (or situationships) and had a marked lack of interest in forming relationships or friendships with others outside of Rhian because he often cut ties with people like Hook or Midas when he no longer had a practical use for them.

One of the greatest “sins” to some autistic people is lying, and it occurred to me that, a few times over, Rafal never lied. (This statement excludes the few exceptions of his Fala disguise, a thought not completely of his own volition which the Storian may have planted in his mind or implicitly suggested with its illustrations, and his general practice of withholding information.) He just weaponizes shades of the truth, unlike Rhian who did outright lie at times. Rafal instead misled, passively allowing people to believe what they wanted to believe about his moral character (oftentimes in the “fact” that he was trustworthy) without truly affirming their views of him or correcting them, as long as doing so continually worked to his advantage. He let them fall into their own delusions, and used lies of omission, which aren’t technically lies.

Although he is often driven by his selfish, insular nature, like towards the singular pursuit of power and becoming the One in Fall, I also suspected that he's often mind-blind in regards to others, sometimes willfully, if it’s not “errors” in how he processes the world. I would guess that he might experience difficulty in understanding and empathizing with others' perspectives, meaning he has trouble with “Theory of Mind.” As evidence, he uses the “wrong” wording when he attempted to placate Rhian at the climax of Fall before the fratricide scene since he’s not used to consoling or providing others with emotional reassurance or comfort. In addition, he seemed unable or unwilling to sympathize with Rhian’s perceived loss to him when he momentarily appeared to hold the Storian’s favor.

Rafal also strikes me as the type of person to devalue a form of emotional, Ever-like “data” he cannot read. If he does (or ever formerly did) suffer from mind-blindness, I have a theory that, possibly, because he could have begun with the inability to comprehend others' mental states, he found an alternate way to operate in and successfully navigate his world with, to thrive in it, consciously comporting himself as Evil, due to the easy potential overlap in autistic behaviors and being a conventional Never, in a way that was insensitive and cold enough to allow for any kind of social faux pas he could have made to be viewed as intentional on his part, assuming he spent most of his time around others masking his autism (covering up and compensating for deficits so as to be perceived as “normal”) even if such a label probably wouldn’t exist in the Woods. He also seems to dislike or barely tolerate any kind of flagrant sentimentality.

If the above point were true, then he would probably not only lack affective, visible empathy he could feel, imitate, and display through his facial expressions and body language, but also cognitive empathy. And this could be potentially because it would be convenient to him, to disregard and not take into account data that is ostensibly “meaningless” to him. Besides, I think there is a chance he’s taught himself to be persuasive or seductive when he wants to or “has” to be, in order to appeal to his victims. The other general possibility I had in mind was that Rafal could have learned to read people until it became second nature to him, with how he used suggestive manipulation on Aladdin to get the thief to steal back the lamp, proving Rafal consciously knew how predictable and pliable human nature could be.

In total, from what I can tell, he is able to manipulate others exceptionally well and lead them on, and yet, when it comes to actually relating to anyone, he seems to have difficulty understanding their points of view if he doesn't just flat-out disregard them in favor of his always being "right," which brings me to his tenacity, how he seems set in his ways, and leans towards extremes. Rafal seems like an all-or-nothing person, and either commits all the way to a cause, even bringing life-or-death ruminations into his internal monologue, or is apathetic and doesn't care at all.

Perhaps, Rafal suffers from sustained emotional dysregulation during certain plot points. He clearly has an inability to “let things go,” as is common with autism because when he was more than slighted by his mutinous students sending him to Monrovia Prison, his temper flared and he went to an extreme of methodically torturing every last child. And afterward, he continued to hold onto a grudge against that one particular class, until he was in closer contact with them, and gradually began to see himself and how he’d conducted himself as School Master from their perspective, literally in the shoes of the Never student Fala he fabricated.

He often has sharp lines of dialogue and witticisms the reader sees as comedic when his intention probably wasn’t to be, thereby meaning he could be unaware of precisely how he comes across to others, as hyperbolic as he is.

His quick wit and resourcefulness led me to think that he is at least partly a verbal thinker, evinced by the Vulcan shanty he composed and some of his scathing one-liners. Plus, he does muse philosophically on occasion in his narration, about matters like the nature of Evil, villainous purpose, and its role in the Woods, or how villains usually work alone while pirates, as a breed, are known to be more communal.

He also twists others’ words at times, uses the “Exact Phrasing” fairy-tale convention, and exploits loopholes oftentimes. I’m pretty sure he sees language as up to interpretation? E.g., he offers to pay a Man-Wolf his "weight in gold" and then, turns the Man-Wolf into gold to make an example of him, weaponizing literal meaning. Overall, as a reader, I feel as if I must watch out for the true meaning of his dialogue.

His reclusiveness, contrasted with Rhian’s desire for romantic love and companionship, and his general social withdrawal are quite prominent, and those asocial, isolative (or more destructively, “antisocial”) tendencies could, as well as being a preference, function as a coping mechanism. Perhaps, he feels better and overall more regulated whilst alone than in the company of other people, who neither give him peace of mind nor obey him, especially those whose every action he cannot control? And maybe, he needs room to breathe and think, and left the School at the start of Rise to shut out the offending emotional stimulus of Rhian’s words, about how all Evil-doers could be reformed to Good and that Evil lacked purpose. If he was emotionally affected by the brothers’ argument, the Aladdin bet, and the chaotic events of the Snow Ball, maybe he just had to sever himself from it all and leave it behind?

He might have Sensory Processing Disorder, which often accompanies autism. I’m not an expert, but from what I could see, there are hints of Rafal having an aversion to light, such as when, in his internal monologue, he remarks on Rhian's glass castle. Additionally, when he intentionally renovated his School, it was dark and dimly lit.

In the ice classroom, he sat at his desk for days on end, entranced by the mirror he enchanted to view the Doom Room with, like he was watching television, like it was some form of a singular obsession, and he did all that presumably without feeling any bodily discomfort. Thus, it occurred to me that, while this instance could be attributed to his invulnerability/immortality, he might just have trouble with interoception or internal bodily sensation. He rarely seems to sense or acknowledge dehydration, exhaustion, or hunger, and seems ascetic while Rhian is slightly more dependent on creature comforts.

One last qualifying trait could be Rafal’s lack of sensitivity to (external) pain as seen when the Storian slashes his palm open for the oath.

As far as the previous two points go, I’ve been questioning whether his potential difficulty with interoception could coexist at once with the artificially-induced traits of his Storian-bestowed invulnerability that later fades over the course of Fall, rendering him mortal, or conditioning over his lifetime as an Evil-doer, as Evil thematically seems to undergo more pain than Good does throughout the series. Even while vulnerable and mortal in Fall, he manages to walk on his limp, and contends fairly well with his broken leg, despite the pain.

If his invulnerability or his Never status does indeed coexist with his possible interoceptive difficulties, it could mask the deficit of sensation, instead being construed as simple invulnerability or the “mettle” of a tough, stoic, Never soul, as Rhian, who possesses the same invulnerability, reacted more towards the same source of physical pain than Rafal did.

⸻

Counterarguments:

Despite all these signs, anyone could have all or most of these traits in isolation, which still may not add up to a complete diagnosis. Basically, this is not only a matter of totalling up traits. We don’t really know how his brain functions as he is fictional and I would bet that if he were real, he couldn’t be arsed to answer interview questions.

I don’t believe he was intended to be autistic, given the fantasy genre of the series and its vaguely historical time frame, even if all this could form a viable headcanon.

We can't entirely be sure that he has a social deficit, or if his manner and apparent “deficit” are displayed by choice or out of practicality.

The most generous (non-deficient) interpretation we can hand him is that he’s simply out of practice. After all, he almost never associates with social equals, aside from Rhian, whom he doesn’t view as an equal.

⸻

In response to my one of my counterarguments:

Then again, neither was Sherlock Holmes intentionally written as autistic since the diagnosis didn’t exist during the Victorian era and hadn't come about until later in Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's lifetime—although many people today conclude that Holmes is indeed autistic and use modern terms to describe him because Doyle based him off of an “eccentric” academic acquaintance, the medical professor Dr. Joseph Bell, who might have been autistic.

In conclusion, I could just be a bit delusional, and this speculation could be far-fetched. Do you think I’m reading too much into whatever may have been intended for Rafal’s character? Could Rafal be autistic, or if not, could his characterization indicate some other type of neurodivergence?

⸻

Thank you for taking the time to read through my thoughts! I’m open to “peer-review.” Anyone?

[practically-an-x-man]

random question- do you headcanon any x-men characters as neurodivergent?

Oooooh man don't get me started-

The short version is, yes. I think there are a lot of characters that are coded as neurodiverse in some way or another, more characters where the manifestation of their mutations could be an allegory for neurodivergency, and even some "lighter" headcanons that I wouldn't want to see in canon but think have good storytelling potential outside of it.

It's a common headcanon that Scott is autistic, and I agree with it. I also think Hank is autistic, but it manifests differently in him than in Scott. I also headcanon that Scott gets chronic migraines, though I'm not sure whether that qualifies as neurodivergency or not.

Prodigy is AuDHD for sure, just by the nature of his powers - he collects skills, takes a new hobby and learns as much as he possibly can about it, masters it, then ends up dropping it and moving on to the next one? I know AuDHD is more than just that, but as someone who does the same thing, it definitely speaks to me and I think he's a good character to reflect that.

Peter Maximoff absolutely has ADHD, he's basically ADHD incarnate.

Erik has PTSD six ways from Sunday, I don't think that one even qualifies as a headcanon. Logan also has PTSD, along with Forge and most/all of the mutants who were drafted into the Vietnam War in DOFP (Alex Summers, Toad, etc.)

I do headcanon Dazzler as having some form, maybe multiple forms, of synesthesia. It could be comorbid with her mutation itself, given her abilities are to change one form of sensory input into a different form of sensory input, and that's effectively what synesthesia is within the brain. In general, I subscribe to the idea of superpowers that genuinely affect multiple aspects of a person's life - it's not just a press-a-button power to turn on, it's woven into their mind and body and genuinely affects how they interact with the world.

I also think any telepath would have to qualify as neurodivergent, given their view on the world is innately impacted by processing the thoughts of everyone around them. I don't know that there would be a specific "label" for what they experience, and I think it varies from person to person, but it's definitely a form of neurodivergency.

I also feel like clone characters are innately neurodivergent, especially in relation to developmental or age-related disorders. Studies of actual cloned animals tell us that they're more prone to neurological conditions and tend to develop age-related mental and physical disorders much earlier than they should, so I think there should be at least some sort of reflection in mutant clones like Laura Kinney. Healing factor of course would negate some of the effects, but I could see her with dyslexia or dyscalculia, or perhaps some form of memory disorder. And of course, in Logan (2017) she has a sort of selective mutism tied to trauma, which could be an neat thing to explore in writing her even outside the context of the movie.

I think there are a lot of characters that would be interesting to explore if they had some form of neurodivergency, even if it's not my headcanon for the canon character. These aren't necessarily what I'd want to see from canon, but I think it brings dimension to their stories and could be neat to explore how it interacts with their mutations.

I mean, it would be neat to see Husk with some form of sensory issues, since it would bind up with her mutation in an interesting way and could make for a cool plot. Take her mutation as a metaphor for dermatillomania, where picking at her skin becomes shedding her skin as her mutation manifests, which at best is unpleasant and at worst could be outright dangerous.

And it would be interesting to explore schizophrenia or psychosis in Magik, especially from a social perspective, since her manipulation of Limbo would no doubt be seen as a psychotic episode by others around her (angsty, but a strong metaphor for the hoops actual people with those conditions have to jump through to get recognized), and even from her own perspective it would be interesting to see how she learns to separate her actual, tangible mutation from the things she might experience with her neurological conditions.

[rin-and-jade]

Brain Goes Brr: A Post about Systems with Comorbidities

I'm back with my dedicated role of writing things for the sake of educational purposes, this time it's about how the two most common comorbids systems have can affect their life, and probably your's too. Being plural is one thing, but when you have the spicy brain (adhd) or the tism (autism),, things changes a lot, the few examples are: thoughts, inner-communication, social challenges, interests, and types of alters too.

Now, how do alters have varying degrees in neurodivergence? Actually, HOW does it mesh together with systemhood?? Because the brain is so complex, this is way too hard to be explained thoroughly,, so in short, it has to do with cognitive styles that got woven together. This also means why certain parts have its individual strengths that respectively comes from the existing comorbid as parts light up the brain's region with different neural paths and intensity.

How would 'tism affect my plural life?

There's a bunch of things that affects you and your other parts, such as:

Special interests - alters can be deeply invested in a certain topic or expertise, the type of interest can vary in multiple parts.

Comfort in consistency or patterns - some alters may prefer eating the same food everyday, or wear the same thing, or stick to their self-made routine. Though the frequency may vary as some can tolerate eating something different and etc.

Less welcoming to change of lifestyle or elses - alters may also have trouble adjusting to a new schedule or area, creating distress and anxiety,, this is managable by coping and planning beforehand.

Issues with social interactions and empathy levels - others may find trouble in understanding social cues, or articulation, and have different levels of verbality. Some may also be hyper-empathetic or struggle to understand what others are feeling, this can be a collective struggle or different variations between parts.

Sensory sensitivities - Last but not least, alters have different sensitivities, some can't handle loud noises, some can't eat a certain texture, some can't wear a type of clothing. Everyone's sensitivity look different.

Fictives/introjects - Due to possibly having interests from a source or finding comfort from it, system with tism are more common being seen with higher amounts of introjects. You're not faking for having too much of a certain type of alters, no worries.

What about the spicy.. or something,, ?

I think you can vaguely get the image, but i'm still telling it here:

Focus and attention - excluding the general experiences of this, i just want to say that the communication between alters are disrupted due to the inability to focus at a part speaking, this may or may not make the system have blurry or muffled inner voices most of the time. Articulating is also a problem, which makes exchanges harder.

Restlessness - this might affect the amount of parts being present, or the amount of switches,, thoughts may be sped up which can make the whole collective or certain part get lost in tracks.

Constant shifting in hobbies/interests - the struggle on keeping a hobby because the dopamine or commitment is lost makes the alter pick up a different one, leaving the previous products or items revolving it in a clutter. Now do this will multiple parts.

Unable to keep up with memories - some alters may have trouble remembering or recalling important things, just like how adhd affects normal people. Though this may vary between parts.

When you have both, the traits of spicy brain and tism may overlap each other, which makes it harder to determine if its only adhd, or only autism, or both,, but don't worry, gather more sources to read on as i don't included all of the traits or struggles each has fully.

So yes, this is how the two most common comorbids comes to play in how a system live their life. The first step of living a better life always starts from being aware and educate yourself more about how it affects you the surroundings. See you next time! (yes i like calling adhd "the spicy" and autism as "tism" please let me be)

Disclaimer: the adhd part comes from my friends as i don't have it myself, please understand.

- j

[aslongasimhereyoureinvincible]

what are your neurodivergent headcanons for hq characters?

asdfjhgfds sorry this has been in my askbox for a few days ive been busy w/ Life Stuff TM but anyways ND haikyuu headcanons lets gooo

hinata:

ik bc hes Sunshiney and Loud lots of ppl read hinata as adhd, which i can deffo see, but personally i read him as autistic

hes extroverted and good at adopting introverts (kageyama, kenma, yachi, tsukki) but when u stop to think abt it hes also actually kinda bad at social ques and 'normal' behaviour?? i think ppl dont notice bc hes also rlly nice but hinata is actually pretty blunt lmao

his special interest is literally volleyball cmon now

its canon that he dislikes being in classes too long or doing homework bc he finds sitting still for too long difficult, both me and my autistic older brother used to get up and pace around our classrooms when we were younger

even though hes rlly athletic and has insane reflexes obviously, hes also pretty clusmy and especially bad at judging distances which to me looks like dyspraxia which is really commonly comorbid w/ autism

ive also read a few fics where he has tourettes syndrome w/ body tic and i can deffo see why ppl would hc that

idk hes just reads as autistic so well in my mind like idk why its not a more common take

kageyama:

this one is less of a headcanon and moreso just interpreting the text correctly; hes definitely autistic

like its my belief that furudate either knowingly wrote kageyama as autistic or like based his personality off of an irl autistic person they knew or SOMETHING bc its actually insane how well he reads as autistic

the lack of social skills? the anger issues? the deep special interest in volleyball? the just wanting to express your feelings/opinions but coming off as rude but not knowing how to fix that? middle school being a living hell? having that one family member who Got you? the high level of skill in one particular area? hes literally the texboox definition of autism

even the little things like how he files his nails and jokes go over his head and he accidentally insults ppl bc hes calling it how he sees it and how he basically had no friends growing up bc he was too focused on volleyball and how he struggles to smile on command like!!! thats autism babe!!!!!!

oh also hes dyslexic bc im dyslexic and i say so

ushijima:

same as kageyama i bet he was either knowing written as autistic or based off of an irl person who is

blunt as all hell, monotone voice and facial expressions, volleyball as a special interest, bad at social interaction, accidentally rude, the list goes on and on

like his whole thing about how his left handedness makes him different but is also a gift that benefits him in some ways? thats a metaphor for neurodivergency dont @ me

oikawa:

i hc him as having narcisstic personality disorder, not in the ableist reddit-user 'all ppl w/ npd are evil manipulative abusers' way but in the ' i have npd and know what it actually looks like' way

hiding massive insecurities by acting like youre amazing?? that fuckin marina lyric thats like 'i feel like im the worst so i always act like im the best'?? that was abt oikawa tooru and npd

feeling threatened the second someone as good or better than you shows up? fixating on one specific thing that you have to be the best at? those are npd as fuck traits

the way he can basically get along with anyone and adjust his play style to suit them but only has a few close friendships where he can let his true personality rlly shine through

hes literally so npd coded augh <3

bokuto:

i read him as adhd and having cyclothymia

i think he was unmedicated in high school and unknowingly had depressive and hypomanic episodes which affected his play

he also very much reads as having rejection sensitive dysphoria if u ask me

and the way he talks and bounces around and has All That Damn Energy gives me adhd vibes, esp pared w/ his poor volume control ad the way he ignores social cues lol

okay quickfire round bc im getting tired of typing

atsumu is autistic, so is osamu for that matter, theyre just at very different points on the spectrum and rub each other up the wrong way a lot of the time bc of it

kita is also autistic bc no neurodivergent person is that particular about doing things the 'right' way

hoshiumi is autistic and adhd

asahi and yamaguchi read like they struggled w/ anxiety and depression

sakusa has ocpd and ocd (contamination ocd specifically) and mysophobia

kyoutani has aspd, again not in a 'aspd = violent agressive psychopaths' way but in a 'i actually have a cluster b personality disorder' way, and adhd also

kenma is autistic and has social anxiety

yachi has social anxiety too bc cmon now

tsukki reads to me as having chronic depression, i think i could also make a case for him being autistic too ngl

tendou is some flavour of neurodivergent, probally audhd, probably some other stuff, idk but hes definitely not neurotypical

like hinata, lev reads as autistic to me even tho hes got that goodball energy thatd make lots of ppl read him as adhd bc like,, he just fuckin sucks at social interaction like he is accidentally rude all the damn time lmaoo

fukunaga and aone are both autistic w/ selective mutism and/or partial to moderate non-verbalness

obviously its none of my business and i think having headcanons abt irl ppl is Fucking Weird but i wouldnt be surprised if furudate themself was autistic bc truly so many characters in haikyuu can be read that way if u ask me, although maybe im just projecting lol