#really wish people would research before saying things lmao

[starfishinthedistance]

Why do so many people like...have such an aversion to admitting they might have OCD? Like someone will be talking about OCD symptoms and people will be like "oh I do that but it's because of my autism!" or "oh yeah that's totally me except ADHD lol"

Like...guys I've got news for you.

ASD and ADHD do not cause obsessions or compulsions. They might cause symptoms that look similar (like dependence on routine in ASD or mental hyperactivity in ADHD), but aren't obsessions or compulsions like what's seen in OCD. If you see OCD people describing their inner thought processes and you relate, you can't chalk it up to ASD or ADHD. However ASD and ADHD are highly comorbid with OCD (about 30% for both autism and ADHD), so chances are you just also have OCD. But an autistic or ADHD person without comorbid OCD is not going to have obsessions or compulsions (again, they might have symptoms that resemble them from an outside perspective, but they aren't going to relate to OCD people describing their OCD).

The only other neurodivergencies that can cause obsessions and compulsions are Tourette's and sometimes personality disorders if we're being technical with our definitions (that could be a whole other post because it's complicated).

Like yes there's overlap between neurodivergencies, but they don't cause identical symptoms, and when you look at the internal processing they're easy to tell apart. If you have the exact same internal processing as someone with OCD, chances are you have OCD. There's probably something to be said about recent OCD demonization leading to this aversion, but that can be saved for another time.

Untreated OCD can be really deadly, you aren't going to be able to get better with OCD if you think it's just your autism or ADHD, that's why this is important.

Bottom line is: research whether certain symptoms appear in a disorder before attributing those things to that disorder to avoid misinfo. Because good God this shit has caused a lot of that.

[cripplecharacters]

Hi! Sorry if this is a stupid question but I was wondering about representing disabilities/things in general that you don't have.

I always see people say that they want characters to be represented properly, and to show their disabilities and lives in an accurate way, but I also see people talk about how you shouldn't write about the struggles a POC/minority/person with a disability/etc. faces because you don't experience that and you're speaking over them or only using their story for "trauma porn" or whatever.

Maybe it's just because I'm autistic but I'm really not understanding how those two things coexist. How do I show how someone lives, especially with a disability that might be painful, without writing about the things they face?

Obviously it would be super weird if the character's entire personality was just "My life is awful because I'm so different, I can't do the things everyone else can, my life sucks."

But what about normal things that they struggle with? Like "Yeah I only have one arm, it's a pain in the ass to do dishes but it's not the end of the world." or "I have albinism so my depth perception is shit but whatever" or "It's fucking annoying when people stare at/judge me because I look different, but if they don't like it that's their problem, not mine lol."

Is the problem whether or not a characters ENTIRE story revolves around their disability? Using my own as an example:

A story, specifically, about how Funky Bungus, as an autistic person, lives in the world and what struggles he has due to his disability, VS a story where Funky Bungus is trying to stop two kingdoms from going to war and there's a short scene where he feels bad about not being able to make eye contract with people, before going back to the Kingdom War Drama.

I just want to use my stories as a way to educate people about disabilities and make people go "Hey, that character is like me!" or to make people think about their actions, like having a character complain about people staring at their scar/missing arm/etc. so maybe people will read it and go "Wow, I guess it IS rude when I don't mind my own business, from now on I won't stare at people."

Sorry if this got long and incomprehensible 😬

I guess the question is "How do I write about the struggles someone with a disability faces without coming across like I'm writing trauma porn or speaking over people" but I just have the Overexplain Everything So I'm Not Misunderstood Disorder™ lmao

I believe you have it right; the problem with many stories about disabilities written by non disabled authors often lies in when the story relies entirely on the disability.

It’s absolutely fine to write about the struggles a character faces — for an example with one of my disabilities, say a non-disabled author wrote about how a character kinda hates their chronic pain and wishes they didn’t have it. But otherwise there’s other stuff going on in the character’s life, like friends and family and hobbies, not just self-pity, and there’s other things going on in the plot, like maybe a mystery to solve or an Item to find or an adventure to go on or something.

That would be perfectly fine, and I’d love to read it actually, and really writing is kind of a balance of using what we know already and mixing it with things we haven’t experienced but have researched and/or thought about.

That’s how you show an authentic character with disabilities — they have struggles, things they can’t do or can’t do as well as others, but that’s not all there is to them. There’s things they enjoy doing, things they’re good at, people they spend time with and things they do.

Good intentions combined with research and knowledge (and good plots!) will make for good stories that feel authentic.

Hope this helps!

Mod Sparrow

Hey!

I think that there can be good stories that have disability/ableism as its primary focus, but they should be #OwnVoices (as in, made by people who experience said thing). That's largely because it often gets very specific and thus easy to misrepresent even if you have good intentions. Sometimes it can end up like "being disabled is so sad and everything is inaccessible, how tragic" and end up pitying the character - rather than actually sympathizing with them - just because that nuance is missing.

To use the same example as you did, "character complains about people staring at their scar sometimes" would be a completely normal way to include ableism as a part of life that does happen, while "character gets bullied for 300 pages for having a facial difference" would be in the torture porn category (when written by someone who doesn't have that experience).

I think that what Sparrow described is the best if you're not describing your own experiences. Including ableism as a thing that happens from time to time or as a tertiary focus is totally fine. That's how it is in real life - sometimes things do suck, but there's still a whole lot of other things that we do.

I think your desire to educate people is admirable, and it should be very much doable with the solutions you presented. Good luck writing,

mod Sasza

[tummysmoocher]

My BF is into feeding and I never really considered it before dating him. (I like being sexually full like stuffed with toys, and I've been able to transfer that to being feeding full as well which he loves)(also I'm sensitive enough to orgasm from belly rubs and I swear when he found that out he almost went like full anime nosebleed. He accused me of lying even tho I didn't even know about his kink when I told him that lmao)

He was so scared to tell me about his kink bc he didn't want me to think he fetishized fat people. Honestly I love that he has this kink bc it is so easy to accommodate. Like I just send a morning vid of tummy jiggles or a cute pic of my torso and face like, "ough so stuffed 🥺 wish someone was here to rub my belly" and he just fucking combusts. It's so easy.

Anyway I saw your post about being grey ace, and I think my BF is in that area too. From his description, I would say he's demi, but he's elected to not use that term so I will respect that. I just find it interesting that I've heard of a number of people in the feeding community who are ace or aro and I wonder if that's a coincidence or not. Like my BF often doesn't "get off" he will just dote on me and feel satisfied from my release.

Anyway, I thought I had more of a point when I started writing this but have since forgotten. Sorry for like. Over sharing in your inbox. I'm not sure if this was weird to do or not honestly. Your blog is the first feederism blog I stumbled across so I'm kinda using it to research™.

Sorry again for over sharing you can delete this if you want. have a good rest of your day ✌️

I read this when it first got send to my inbox and I think it’s so sweet and cool so I’m SO sorry for answering it so late. It’s really nice to hear abt others experiences with relationships and navigating sexuality and kinks and such like that, especially hearing about a partner doing research into a kink that they may not be super familiar in or like, things like that. Makes me super happy to read :) so sorry again for the later answer but I hope you’re doing great <3

[chvoswxtch]

Hi Court!

Can I get a screening of a romcom about the college hijinks of Matt Murdock and Foggy Nelson? Where there moments that, in retrospective, could have clued Foggy into the fact that his feral cat of a roommate is a ninja?

Thanks!

FERAL CAT OF A ROOMMATE LMAO

that's actually very accurate, and hilarious, bc foggy did pretty much adopt matt like a stray cat that became family (and a menace to his life)

headcannon below the cut

legally blonde starring matt murdock & foggy nelson

foggy knows that his roommate is blind, and he knows from doing research that blind people's other senses tend to be a bit heightened after the loss of their sight (you can't convince me that foggy didn't do a deep dive into how to love and care for his new bestie that he referred to, and I quote, as a "really, really good looking guy")

SO he doesn't find it strange that matt is more sensitive to smells, like foggy's dirty laundry that's been sitting in the corner for a week, or that his taste is also sensitive, which is why he doesn't like certain foods. he doesn't play his music too loud, and if matt is trying to study in their dorm, foggy will opt for headphones. and he spared matt the torment of having to wear one of his mom's homemade ugly christmas sweaters bc he told her matt was sensitive to textures (an excuse he wished he could use)

however, every now and then, foggy does notice strange things about his best friend

matt always seems to know when someone is being dishonest. when they have mock trials in their law class, matt always seems to know if the person he's going up against is bluffing, if they're lying about the evidence, or if they're bullshitting about laws that matt knows like the back of his hand. foggy just thought he was a really good lawyer

he'd also noticed that matt got around really well for someone without sight, sometimes even better than foggy did. there were times foggy got lost on campus, and matt had to guide him. but he chalked it up to matt just having a good memory

matt also seemed to have bat ears. if foggy missed something a professor said in class, matt heard it and recited it for him. if foggy mumbled something under his breath about matt being an insufferable stubborn dick, matt would just smirk and say, "I heard that"

but then there was the time that foggy got sick thinking he just had a bad cold and matt had cocked his head to the side (you know, how he does) and his brows furrowed as he suddenly informed foggy he had the flu. sure enough, matt was right, and when foggy quizzed matt about how he knew that, matt just stumbled over an excuse about his symptoms and then promptly walked out

oh and then there was the one time they went out drinking and foggy almost tripped and fell down the stairs outside their dorm, but matt had caught him just in time and pulled him back, with a surprising amount of strength. foggy still wasn't sure how matt knew they were right next to the steps, but he was drunk, so he figured maybe he remembered it wrong

he'd also found out that matt liked to box, and that he went to his dad's old gym when he needed to relieve stress. he never mentioned it to matt, but he was always curious about how that worked. matt did seem to have incredible reflexes, but foggy thought perhaps his dad had shown matt a few things back before he'd lost his sight, and it was just muscle memory

but the thing that caught foggy's attention the most was how matt always seemed to know where the prettiest girls in the room were. he was like a magnet for attractive women, which worked out in foggy's favor bc they always had pretty friends, but still...it was almost eerie. he also seemed to attract women that were the absolute worst for him, which foggy hated, but matt being the whore he was, they never lasted long enough to do any real damage (except for to foggy's ear drums which led to them coming up with a silent communication for when one of them matt was busy being a slut in their dorm room)

[bropunzeling]

11, 22, 37!

11 Three tropes that are fine but overrated

oh gosh hmm. some of these are gonna come across as hypocritical lmao and also insert a healthy dose of "for me specifically" but: (1) i think soulbond/soulmark tropes can be done well, but mid executions of the trope focus a lot on ~finding~ the person rather than interrogating what it means to have bonds or marks or things of that nature, and leave a lot of interesting nuances about choice and free will and conflict between romantic relationships and other things you might want (career, friendship, autonomy, etc) on the table. i wish more takes on the trope let it be messy! (2) hurt/comfort done well is really fun but when people are just like. aggressively making their little guy sad and pathetic and a poor little meow meow whose never done anything wrong it gets grating. i love a sad guy but i prefer when they're sad because of shit they did to themselves instead of external factors. (3) curtain fic/established relationship stuff can be fun sometimes but like. there still needs to be a smidgen of conflict or growth or change or a shift for me to be interested. there has to be a point imo! even when i write my silly self-indulgent post-fic time stamps its important to me that there's a point to it beyond just "im love them" (though im DO love them)

22 What is it about watching the same two idiots falling in love over and over again?

i think the thing is, there can always be a new dimension to how these two idiots fall in love!!! every story is an opportunity to get at some new nugget of like, how people are, or what it is to be vulnerable and open and willing to risk heartache. with two different people you have so many opportunities to look at different shades and facets of their character. especially with rpf where real life events can shape characterization in real time. The Trade opened up a whole new dimension of matthew that creates new angles to investigate matthew&leon and what it means to fall in love with someone thousands of miles away and who you see even less (or, someday, for my break up/make up agenda)! jamie getting dealt to philly opens up new ways to poke at the jamie/trevor relationship by adding distance and tragedy and the potential of falling for other people! even picking a new trope or time period is just so fun for being like, now how would they be under THESE circumstances? also like, i LOVE flip-flopping who gets to be down bad immediately and who is oblivious because it's not only a fun creative challenge but also just opens up new worlds. idk! there's so many possibilities and so many facets to explore and to me that's delightful.

37 Do you research before writing or while you write? Is it fun or boring for you?

id say i do some up front, just to nail down the broad beats of the story and to minimize how much reworking i have to do later on (or for period type fics, to make sure that i dont introduce plot points that simply cant have happened in that time frame!), and some i do as i go -- for example, for a while there i just HAD the battles of alberta in 21-22 down pat because i was using them so often to shape story beats, but the games in between i had to look up as i went. i also am constantly pulling from new articles or features that offer new bits of characterization i want to use. tbh with the current wip i DO feel very wobbly because i don't have my normal anchors of the schedule/have to make things up, which is simultaneously freeing and hard because it's so much easier for me to write about sports games that really happened than the fake ones im constructing for the narratives 😂. but yeah id say mostly i research as i go!

[irrigos]

been thinking about motr again (as is my wont) and i think one of my complaints about it is that i think it's kind of weird that no one is antisemitic??

not that im like. "boo i wish there was more bigotry in the world!!" or smth lmao. it's just that it feels like maybe there was supposed to be some but then they chickened out

like. archie is accused of murdering david, and we know immediately that he didnt do it because he's our friend (and also thats just how stories work.) but i still dont understand why everyone else is so convinced he did it, when they never bother to give him a motive

when I heard the pitch for motr, I had assumed the motive would be bigotry. even if archie himself isnt antisemitic, it would make sense for Harjit or David or anyone who thinks archie did it to at some point go "well the victim was a marginalized person, so we just assume the motive was bigotry" but no one ever says that, even as just. a possibility?? but they ALSO dont have a different, stronger motive for Archie to have done it?? if Archie and David had some sort of enmity, this probably wouldn't be a problem at all, but since they dont have anything, it really feels like the only possible motive would have been prejudice, and yet no one will ever say it, even as a possibility that gets refuted

it just seems really weird to me!! ive posted before about how i understand why FBG writes stuff the way they do (writing period-accurate bigotry isnt like. fun. and also i dont think it would be commercially successful, especially if you want to court an audience of non-bigots) but it just kinda. lacked some verisimilitude for me on this one, especially because they made such a big thing about how much research they were doing and how they were consulting experts so they could write their first explicitly Jewish characters in the universe?? like... did you guys just. forget. why did you even bother researching that much when it's never really part of the story?

(also, my incredibly minor complaint is that i think its a missed opportunity to not have one of the Landaus comment on how golems are real apparently. like sure i guess they never actually cross paths with Moss but. yknow... cmon)

anyway this is also just kind of a matter of taste, because i know that bigotry free fantasty worlds are very popular with some people, and i definitely get the appeal!!! it just does very little for me, especially in what is technically a period piece. for me personally, it doesnt hit as like "oh cool a fun fantasy world that im welcome in :3" it just comes across (TO ME) as. very fake

.... but actually now that ive written the whole post, i think the real problem is that they forgot to give archie even a POSSIBLE motive, but also wouldnt suggest, even as a possibility that gets refuted, the most obvious motive, which wouldn't even require them to change any of the story beats at ALL. its just a really weird writing decision and i don't get it

[feminisedlad]

How might one get into "reading for a living" because that's a dream job

it is not a dream job, its called publishing and i make less than 40k a year LOL.

to be less arch, im an editor, and i work in editorial which is the 'flashy' department (lmao), but it's a pretty stressful job. obviously it's one i enjoy because no one would stay in the industry unless they got some reward for it. but still. i say 'reading books' is my job but thats probably only like 40% of it. a lot of my day to day work involves nagging people for deadlines, having meetings abt whether XYZ feature will cost extra, researching marketing trends, etc. YMMV if you work as a book designer or some other dept, i know they have different rules. this isnt to bitch but i think publishing has REALLY good PR among english majors and these are things i wish someone had told me before i sunk money into a publishing degree. BTW: dont get a publishing degree. experience > MA in publishing

so like, i cant in good conscience recommend the industry -- its sort of like going to grad school except with worse pay (the phd candidate gets a stipend; the unpaid intern does not.) but if you already have prion disease and you want to go into publishing, heres what i got

publishing advice below:

first things first, you need book experience. you can get this through the obvious ways (working on ur college lit mag, unpaid internships, copyediting freelance work) but i feel like that prob goes without saying. so what ill say is: if none of those options work, you could always work at a bookstore. lots of the editors i work with actually got their start by saying in the interview, "i worked at barnes and noble and noticed that [category] sells well. i love noticing which books resonate with people" or what have you

i will say that i work in nonfiction publishing, which has some differences from like, editing queer YA fiction. one of those jobs is more competitive than the other. and the industry standards are pretty toxic (if your author misses his deadline and sends the manuscript at 6pm, tough shit, you have to work late to make sure the book doesn't miss its pub date. if you're not thinking about all your books constantly, you must not really care. etc.)

that said one of the best things i can recommend is looking into publishing jobs in different departments. most people are competing for editorial department jobs (things like acquiring and signing books, and being the main point of contact for an author.) but if your passion mostly lies in editing or making things pristine, managing editorial departments often hire production editors who still read through all the books, but their day to day work is more like proofreading, checking barcodes, and other printing related tasks.

theres also finance. finance publishing jobs are never anyones first choice, but on the plus side, you wont have to tell the author why his advance is late. thats the acquiring editor's job. and also lots of people pivot to editorial after they have some years doing finance, design, production, etc.

i will say there are way more remote publishing jobs now than ever. theyre all super competitive but you should apply anyway. if youre entry level, look for "editorial assistant" type roles. some of these actually pay really well: to give an example, harvard hires copyeditors and editorial assistants at a rate which is more than my yearly salary. i mean, its harvard. you gotta look around. but there are more options besides the big 5 publishers. academic publishing is its own field! work at your favorite journal/database! work at JSTOR or wiley!

i dont think theres anything else i would add, other than just random shit talking abt industry standards and quirks of the industry. i dont want to sound whiny because i realize im lucky to be working in my field -- but, i think people oversell publishing as one of "the only career options for english majors."

to be totally honest, most people could make double or triple my salary from being a project manager or corporate editor. so if you enjoy reading and editing, there are better options to you than trade publishing. if you enjoy the act of connecting with authors and making their vision a reality, you might enjoy publishing. or you might not. idk!

[nightowl33art]

Reminder not to fakeclaim people at random lmao

(this is mainly referring to DID/OSDD but can apply to any condition. This is an expanded version of today's tweets)

Reminder that DID/OSDD is very real and there are documented cases! It's not a silly quirky thing, it's something that real people suffer from, myself included.

Someone posting "DID cringe" decided to fakeclaim me earlier today. Because of it, I have things to say.

No, obviously I do not condone harassment of this user. I won't censor on the chance they're a troll-- they've just started this acc and it looks like this could potentially be ragebait. If you wish to do something, report them. Attacking and sending threats does not help.

Either this person >HAS DID and wants to attack fakers, even if it means harming actual DID havers (may include gatekeeping how THEY think DID should look) >They don't have DID and are just gatekeeping DID >They don't think DID is real and everyone with it is cringe and faking (most likely, even based on the @ alone.) >They're an actual troll that wants to just hurt people

Obviously I'm cringe, but fakeclaiming me is another thing entirely. On the chance this person legitimately thinks I'm faking, I've left the above responses. For one, yeah I'm basically recognized medically. I will clarify, there's some minor nuance to it, but it's something I've made sure already to address with multiple professionals I've visited multiple times. Professionals who agree. I would never say I have DID without seeking a professional opinion first, and made sure to withhold such a statement before receiving that opinion. Even today, I still strive to find and work with a specialist to explore this further when I have the opportunity to.

Below's some misc stuff they've posted.

While self-diagnosis CAN be harmful, dangerous, and stupid if done incorrectly, I don't think it should be completely disregarded. Self-dx'ing should be done responsibly and is poor to do without proper, extensive research. As a friend put it, "self diagnosing is fine as long as you use it for self discovery, and keep your mind open to changing or correcting your own diagnosis with new info. If you're wrong? Congrats, you come out with coping mechanisms for whatever it is you do have. If you're right? You've done extensive research into your condition and are educated. The only time self diagnosis is wrong is when you don't actually care about the disorder and just want the label".

This is inherently false. DID and roleplaying are VERY different. It's posts like this that make me believe this user doesn't think it's real. Though the previous use of "fakers" and "self-diagnosis" kinda implies there are real DID-havers lol?? It's true some fakers are just weird, maybe insensitive roleplayers, but these two are not one in the same. (You shouldn't roleplay a mental health condition like that ofc.)

Unless you're a qualified mental health professional, have the training to identify and analyze these things, and you personally know me enough TO diagnose me, you can't legitimately attempt to fakeclaim me, or anyone else.

If you don't have DID, you don't know what it's like either. While it's unclear whether or not this person has it, they don't have a place to make such an assumption. I assume they assume things, because I HIGHLY doubt they spent the time to actually look at my account beyond what I posted for pride. Having amnesia fucking sucks. Having conflicting feelings and thoughts sucks. Having heavy PTSD and barrels of trauma really sucks. These things fuck with me a lot!

It's possible that they have DID, and if so, they're gatekeeping. YOU CAN'T GATEKEEP DID. This happens a lot due to misinformation and poor perceptions. There's no ONE universal way to "have DID." My experiences not looking exactly like another's doesn't mean one of us is a faker.

A system is completely valid if they have a fictional character introject. A very common misconception running around these days is that if someone has fictives/lots of fictives, they're clearly a fake. That's just. NOT true. Systems are introjective by nature, so they take traits from their surroundings. We (as in many people today) use media to escape and cope. Sometimes the dissociative brain finds something in a fictional character that it feels it NEEDS in order to survive. So it takes that.

This is a SUBCONSCIOUS PROCESS, meaning you have no say in what happens. So actually, with how much media we consume these days, fictives should be normal and expected! (Ofc this isn't to say fictives can't still be pulled off by fakers.)

Al is a great example because he didn't ask to resemble Alastor (Hazbin Hotel.) It's actually something he's a bit embarrassed by. He knows how it looks to be an Alastor introject and knows the stigma around the show. He formed because I couldn't handle a situation, My subcon paralleled my situation to Alastor's conflict with Vox and felt Alastor was able to handle it well. So Al was formed to do the same in my place, allowing me to thrive in it instead of shut down. I had to figure this out with time and exploration.

DID does not grant you immunity, and you're still responsible for all actions you perform, whether it's yours or another alter's. DID never should be an excuse to be a shit person like the above, if true, but it should be handled and acknowledged with the respect and understanding deserved.

We're people- your friends and family, not freakshows.

[chthonicgodling]

In real time, who was the last person to make Loki laugh and was there context behind it ?

(Accepting EeL questions again come humor me!!)

🥺🥺 oh god oh no this is SUCH a cute question i……. wish I had an equally as cute and fluffy answer because I most certainly do NOT lmAO UH-

yknow I.,,,, lemme explain something in case i somehow haven’t made this crystal clear even though iiiiii feel like I’ve outlined the circumstances pretty clearly over the years but especially the last few months. Loki’s family is the Elysium palace wholeheartedly, he cares deeply about the people he lives with and is the happiest he’s ever been, especially now lately through this new exciting ongoing tryst with Maci and Tory and ESPECIALLY now lately that they’ve scooped him very possessively into their bed at this moment in time to give him the baby and this is all mushy gushy lovey dovey like living in a dream.

would Loki ever ever ever ever ever ever admit any of that ever EVER?????

absolutely not<3 all that up there and STILL Loki absolutely must keep up appearances in skulking coolly around and glowering scowling OR wryly smirking, all that up there wrt Maci and Tory and he’s STILL SOMEHOW PRETENDING that Ugh Please I don’t Cuddle 😒😒 (?!?!?!?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING THEN) lmfao even re: all these little games in the bedroom with them he’s SUCH a stubborn prideful brat that his safeword only exists bc he otherwise insists on eyerolling and whining and fighting and they can’t fuckin tell the difference (again this is A DREAM COME TRUE also he’s never once tapped out of. anything. brat brat brat. INSUFFERABLE just admit you LIKE them aaAHH)

So UGH I waantttt to be able to coo and say yeah Loki gigglefits while snuggled with his temporary play partners but ffs of cOURSE NOT cause that means they win😒that means admitting he likes all of these people 🙄 it actually was Tory ANYWAY though but not the way you’d think UGH

during that period of constant anxious interrogation between “you really want to have a baby with me???” and “…ok surprise I was already pregnant that whole time.” One of Loki and Tory’s many talks about it, I think I posted bits of it on the other blog, in which Loki kept coming up with “well what about — this? And what about— if this? And if that?” And Tory had an even calm reassuring response for every SINGLE thing Loki threw at him. Finally after Loki was like “okay well what if you and Maci change your minds and you both turn on me or turn on each other BECAUSE of me and this child single-handedly causes the entire downfall of your marriage what THEN checkMATE” and Tory finally was like …..I think you’re just gonna have to trust us on that one

…the god of Lies proceeded to laugh in his face (dragging his hands over his face and collapsing in a defeated heap. “Yeah, I know,” said Tory.)

Anxious laughter of disbelief SHOULDNT really count though so quick addendum. I did actual research into this!! Loki brand genuine laughter before that was *checks notes* oh. uhh. well that’s extremely nsfw. But it was also Tory. lmao lmao kind of. uhhhhhh.

…..hang on scooting over to the nsfwblog again….. right here <33

I’m going to be extremely vague dggdkgkgk, time period this was like, right before Baby Decisions. I’ve mentioned the specific trio dynamic is in which Tory doms Loki but Maci doms them both<333 since really at the end of the day Tory’s a sub leaning switch at heart lmao (did we know this? mwah) and so, well, if Maci’s not there supervising that DOES sometimes make Tory susceptible…… to well, Loki being able to bat his eyelashes and purrtalk his own way out of situations. for example perhaps that key that I keep vaguely mentioning is floating around on a necklace shared by Maci and Tory that I refuse to elaborate further about —

Anyway flipping Tory upside down metaphorically/very physically is ABSOLUTELY grounds for all smug giggles and fun and games!! until Maci comes back and laughs louder and brat-wrangles back to normal 🤦🏻‍♀️ (it is worth mentioning that horny idiot will continue doing this infinitely to obtain the same result. does the punishment fit the crime??? uh hello absolutely that’s the whole POINT,)

OKAY LEAVING THE NSFW SECTION How about the last person to make him really smile?????? ….help that was also Tory (and Maci). Just last night one half flicker of a real smile very quickly before anyone catches him CAN be obtained with the very easy formula of: snuggle tightly, purr, gib kiss.,, EASY. ohghhhgghh

Anywayyyyyy this answer is perhaps insane but it’s been typed with little to no proofreading at nearly 1 am so. yikes augh THANK U THO

one of my goals in all of this truly is to get One Genuine Gushy Lovey Moment on Loki’s end, let’s laugh and smile and snuggle and PLEASE?!!!?! cause Maci and Tory are soooooooo on top of that like even though they ARE NOT BECOMING A COUPLE (through gritted teeth and insistence!!) I just 🥺 can we get ONE I love you from Loki please eee eee we’ve already got them from Tory and Maci plEEEA A S EEEE—

[aesethewitch]

#OcculTea - Conclusions

What are some topics of conversation I’d like to see more of in our community?

I do think that there’s a lack of intermediate to advanced content in the public eye. And I understand why, of course. Beginners find posts they don’t understand and ask a million basic questions: “How do I raise energy?” “Should I cast a circle first?” “If I don’t have this ingredient, what can I substitute? But I don’t have that either, what about this?”

And if they don’t get answers, or if the wrong person finds a post that speaks just a little too authoritatively, they get pissed. Tumblr’s hatemail game is, indeed, unreal. It’s hard sometimes to want to publish something personal or talk about something that the General Audience might disagree with or that’s more advanced than what can usually be found out there.

It would require beginners to recognize when something isn’t really for them (yet). It would also require people to give the benefit of the doubt and actually read a whole post before jumping to the replies or into the poster’s ask box to complain about their wording or tone or “how could you leave out such and such specific detail” or other annoying, disrespectful nonsense like that. Alas, this is the piss on the poor website.

What are my community needs?

My top priorities in a community are somewhere to ask questions, somewhere to have casual, low-stakes conversations, and somewhere to share and vet resources (books, PDFs, shops, materials, websites, blogs, etc.). I sometimes fall off the face of the earth and go hermit-mode for mental health reasons, so communities that require constant participation and look down on declining invitations are no-gos for me.

For the most part, I do think my community needs are being met! I wish I had an in-person place to go, hang out, buy or make things, and just exist as a witch without worrying about conforming to love-and-light ideals and/or cultural appropriation. I’ve been thinking about starting meet-ups at our local library, but the idea of no one showing is… well, it sucks and is scary. So. We’ll see how that goes.

Where would I like to be held and supported?

It really depends.

In this space (Tumblr), the greatest supports are reblogs. Liking a post does little for me in terms of exposure and connection. A reblog spreads my work to new eyes while also showing me that yes, the thing I’ve written is useful in some way. Replies are also good, but reblogs are really where it’s at.

Direct interaction with my work encourages me to write and publish more. I stopped putting up my research into digital divination (which has continued, by the way) because it wasn’t getting any notes. To me, that says that no one’s reading it. If no one’s reading it, I shouldn’t spend so much time cleaning up my notes for presentation, because that’s time I could use better elsewhere on work that will get attention and perhaps pay the bills.

Which kinda sucks! Research into theory and the history of these niche topics are very much passion projects of mine. I’ve got all sorts of notes dissecting Pick-A-Card tarot culture and clickbait tarot YouTube/TikTok videos that may never see the light of day, because it just… doesn’t get noticed. No one cares. I care, obviously, and that’s why I’m still doing it for myself. I’d love to share it, but… again, who cares, aside from me?

Basically, just… interact with stuff, lmao. Tip if you can, still interact if you can't. If you enjoy someone’s work, reblog it. Likes do nothing for creators on this platform. And as someone who relies on this platform to spread my business, reblogs really do make all the difference. (PS: Everyone who has ever recommended my services to someone else, either here or elsewhere, is literally an angel. Word of mouth does more for small businesses than any amount of advertising I could possibly do. You’ve got no idea. Ily.)

Where do I feel like I’m not truly being seen by my community?

I get a lot of attention for my free tarot stuff that I do every Friday. And that’s fair. People love a freebie. There’s a whole subculture of tarot readers here on Tumblr who just do different kinds of free readings for people, often for fun.

But again, the stuff I’m actually proud of tends to get less notes than the throwaway shitposts. It’s rough. I have a feeling that all the hours I’m sinking into writing out these questions and editing the posts will go to waste.

How can we help each other in removing the external peer pressure and grow in community?

Be the change you want to see. Here on Tumblr, there’s a sort of fear surrounding judgment. In the interest of never being judged, receiving hate, or otherwise being “called out,” we avoid publishing work that’s anything close to controversial. Even if it isn’t controversy, if something isn’t being talked about, it’s scary to be the first one to break into the topic. Because what if it’s terrible to talk about?

When you see something you don’t understand or disagree with, don’t instantly jump into OP’s replies or ask box with vitriol or basic questions. Try to find resources first. Check their tags; maybe they’ve talked about that topic before and have a more basic or detailed explanation on the topic somewhere.

Unless it’s actively harmful (bigotry, appropriation, etc.), if you can’t respectfully interact with someone’s post, leave it alone. The important thing to remember is that we don’t need to (and perhaps shouldn’t) form opinions on absolutely everything we see. Some things aren’t for us, and that’s okay. I see things I disagree with and dislike all the time as I peruse the witchcraft tags. Just scroll.

The other part of this is acknowledging that some people just aren’t going to learn how to act right. They just aren’t. We, as a community, need to learn how to ignore those people. There’s an age-old adage that I think we need to bring back into the public eye: Don’t feed the trolls.

How can we, as a community, come together more with constructive criticism without it seeming shady/passive aggressive?

The absolute first step is to learn the difference between hatemail, constructive criticism, and being fucking rude. Tone can be hard for some folks, especially when written out, but it’s critical that you either learn how to decipher it or find people who can help you do so if you’re not able to do it yourself before making assumptions about someone’s meaning.

Hatemail is direct nastiness written and designed to make someone feel bad about themselves, their work, their circle, their practice, or something else. The idea is to make the receiver uncomfortable. This would include attacks on someone’s character. This category includes sending people slurs, telling people they’re stupid for believing something, demanding that someone prove their worth, and unsolicited and harsh criticisms of the work being put out.

Constructive criticism is intended to improve the content you’re seeing. That’s what makes it constructive. It’s respectful to ask the OP if they’re open to receiving constructive criticism before sending it. This category includes helpful notes on content, correcting misinformation, pointing out problems in the language used, and structure of the post in question. For example, I’ve received constructive criticism that my posts tend to be very long-winded. And, I mean, yeah — that’s a fair criticism. But I like writing long posts, so that’s unlikely to change. However, I can include shorter posts in the mix to diversify and appeal to different audiences.

The prime example of someone being plain fucking rude is adding inane, off-topic, judgy comments in a reblog of an innocuous post or send unsolicited, long-winded trauma dumps to someone’s inbox. This could also apply to giving unsolicited advice or speaking in a condescending manner. For example, assuming someone knows less than you and handing out “advice” as though it’s gospel without checking to see whether they would or wouldn’t know that information/practice differently than you. This category refers to the people who aren’t (purposely) sending hate, but their words absolutely come off that way. I find rudeness comes from a lack of self-awareness and consideration for other people. These are the folks that when you tell them to fuck off, they get very offended and don’t understand why you’re reacting badly.

The key is reading comprehension, critical thinking, and compassion. Before you send an ask, reply/reblog, or DM them, try to see where the OP is coming from. What’s their culture, what’s their background, how new are they to their path, why are they posting about the thing they’re posting, etc.? Have you read their post correctly? Are you projecting any kind of expectations or assumptions onto the OP or their post that aren’t actually being stated there?

Will what you say hurt their feelings? Has the OP stated that they’re open to feedback? If not, should you ask them first? Will the OP suffer in some way or cause harm if you don’t reach out to them about the thing you want to tell them? Are you reaching out simply to have something to say, or are you actually adding to the conversation?

If more folks come into conversations with kindness and genuine curiosity, leaving their egos, assumptions, and impulses to be “on the same level” or “better than” other practitioners aside, better interactions happen. Just… don’t be an asshole. Think before you speak. Consider the consequences of what you say before hitting send. So on and so forth.

Consider a class or guide on providing constructive criticism. Creative writing or other literary courses and guides go over this kind of thing extensively.

How can we, as a community, do better when we do receive criticism/feedback?

Remember that, in general, even unsolicited criticism is rarely about you as a person. It is sometimes, but even that can be useful. The only times I would say you ought to throw out criticism entirely is when it veers into hatemail territory. You don’t owe hateful bitches anything, least of all your time.

But in the case of actual feedback, even if it’s not worded the best or if it arrives out of the blue, it’s important to at least read it and take it into consideration.

Take a step back. Take a breath. The knee-jerk reaction to defend yourself is a powerful one. Let the sting of criticism sink in, and do whatever you need to do to soothe it.

Then, read it again. Parse what the person is actually saying. No matter how they’re saying it, what is their actual problem? Is it something you can change? Is it something you’re willing to change? Even if not, is it something you can take into account for the future?

Constructive criticism, when given and received in a positive way, can create some really beautiful moments of understanding and growth. Consider, again, a class or guide on constructive criticism. When they talk about giving it, they also talk about receiving and using it. It really is a life-changing sort of lesson.

As for dealing with hatemail, fuck ‘em. Delete that shit, block the asshole, and don’t look back.

Who are some community members I look up to that are reliable resources and aspirations?

Ohohohohoho, spotlight time!

It isn’t something I can really direct people toward, since it’s a private Discord server, but I’m part of a group of practitioners who are constantly supporting each other. We ask questions, give advice, chat about projects, and just generally lift each other up all the time. That server is, by far, the greatest resource I’ve got right now. It’s a very small community of friends whose passions are diverse and incredibly interesting. The amount of learning and collaboration that goes on… man. I really do love it. (If you’re in that server, and you read this: Hi, I appreciate you! (: )

Now, let’s tag some people (going down my following list):

@elminx — Minx is amazing. The recipe experiments, the astrology insights, the clever techniques… She’s got something for everybody.

@fernthewhimsical — Two words: rainbowmancy and hopepunk. Seriously, go to Fern’s blog and go through the witchcraft tag. So much good stuff.

@jasper-pagan-witch — Our very own TBR and Blogs Georg. I very much recommend checking out their sideblog @jasper-book-stash for brief book reviews.

@coinandcandle — Click through Coin’s pinned post for all sorts of goodies, including deep dives on deities.

@breelandwalker — Tumblr’s resident witchstorian! Check out her podcast, Hex Positive, for beginner-friendly, funny, informative content that ranges from spell techniques to the history of witchcraft.

@windvexer — Chicken answers questions of all sorts! We share the gift (curse?) of verbosity. Their answers are detailed and informative, and I aspire to that level of coherency in my rambling.

@stagkingswife — Silly! Hat! Theory! Stag’s views on spirit work literally changed my whole mind about godspousing and what makes a deity a deity. Legitimately.

@asksecularwitch — Spells Georg. THE secular witch. An icon whose gumption I respect above all others.

And… I’m so sure there are others I’m forgetting about. [gestures] All of my mutuals are lovely, follow them and throw money at their respective Ko-Fi and Patreon pages. (:

Off of Tumblr, I tend toward YouTube’s witch ecosystem. A few people I follow there are The Green Witch, the Witch of Wonderlust, Mint Faery, and Hearth Witch. Again, there are more, but these are the channels I follow most closely for their content!

Final thoughts?

This was fun to put together! I won’t directly tag anyone to respond with their own answers, because… well, this has been a beast of a project that’s taken several days to type out and more to edit. But if you’re a witchy content creator here on Tumblr, please feel free to check out the list of questions and post your own answers!

Replies, reblogs, and asks on any or all of the topics covered in this post series are very much welcome.

This is the final part of a series! Click here to view the masterpost to see all #OcculTea posts in this series. Replies, reblogs, and asks on any or all of the topics covered in this post series are very much welcome.

[mermaidsirennikita]

Ok I saw someone who's seen the screeners for season three get asked about the Francesca rumors and they said there was no indication Michael was a woman and when asked who they think is going to be the lead next season they said probably Fran because there's no set up for Benedict or Eloise.

We’ll see. I would be surprised if someone saw screeners for all 8 episodes for a two-part season at once and was willing to tell y’all everything you needed to know weeks before the first part of show came out, but that’s just me! I've seen people indicate that they received screeners for four episodes, or six episodes, but not all eight.

The rumors about Fran aren’t based on someone seeing screeners but someone allegedly hearing things from people closer to the show, as well as a casting call for a female character that is allegedly meant to be prominent in s4, with sex scenes included. You'd think that would either be Sophie or some other important female character, right? But this character's description centers on someone devilishly charming~ with a flirty exterior that masks a sensitive, soulful interior. Doesn't sound like Sophie.

Someone is lying, right? OR someone saw every episode except the last one or two, and this character only showed up in the final ep (which is what the genderbending rumors have indicated) and the person watching the screeners is making assumptions about where the unseen episodes will lead.

I’ll just say this: I…… don’t care if they do it or not. I mean, tbh, I find watching fan reactions far more entertaining than watching the show. If the idea of a genderflipped ANYONE bugs someone, I’d tell that someone to be emotionally prepared for that or whatever lmao because I think this show’s team profoundly dgaf about what book fans think. Which honestly? Fair. The issue is less changes and more…. Writing quality. To me, it's kind of irrelevant; if they give Fran a female love interest, that dramatically changes the plot of WHWW and it's basically their own thing, albeit with some WHWW framing influence (John dying and the new love being his relative). But if they kept Michael male, I'm sure the resulting storyline would be nothing like the book anyway. S1 is the only story that seems to have retained much of a resemblance to the book. I mean, s3 remains to be seen, but Colin wasn't out there trying to give Penelope the She's All That treatment in the book.

Either way. I like that book, and I'll always have that book, so to reiterate: do your own research if you wish, make your own predictions, I do not have a dog in this hunt. The only thing that would intrigue me would be if they genderflipped the story AND made it the central romance of s4. That would honestly surprise me, and I guess that it's the only thing that I'd really second guess. Not because I think the show wouldn't center a queer couple, necessarily, as a love story. I'd just, and I say this as someone who tries to read and review as many sapphic romance novels as I can, be surprised that this show would center a f/f pairing versus an m/m pairing. The lack of support for f/f compared to m/m across ALL media is like... notorious.

But if it's a subplot to a central m/f story--I could totally see that.

[raffaelamusiker]

Formal request to also ask all of them for the fic ask

(You can't prove it's been a whole month)

Origonal post

What is your favorite line that you’ve written in a fic?

‘Not yet’ whispers through the trees and B’Elanna shudders. And I couldn't even tell you why but it's my most favourite <3 From Existing In Your Orbit

What is one canon thing that you wish you could change?

Oooh boy. Honestly Rios staying in 2024.

Out of the comments you’ve received on your fics, what are two or three of your favorites?

I recently recieved amazing long comments on my Jemily series and I think they might be my most favourite. Also Jaz's comment on Mercy and the ones where people ask me for more smut because they're so funny.

What is your wildest headcanon?

I wrote a crack fic the other day where Seven drank a Big Gulp without taking a breath so I guess that one.

What’s your ideal writing setup?

Somewhere cosy and no noise.

Do you like to outline your fic first or create as you go?

Depends. For multi-chapter I usually try and have an outline or basis. usually just go with the flow and what kind of fic it is.

Have a piece of a WIP you want to share?

“What, and I’m not important enough for you to want to stay?” Raffi shoots back, picking at her nails. 

The hand that’s gripping the page of the book in her lap moves quick enough that it rips it before she snaps the book shut loudly. A pang of regret fills her chest at the fact that this is one of Raffi’s books but her frustration takes over everything else. 

“Stop putting words in my mouth, Raffi.” Seven stands to walk away. “When have I ever said you aren’t important? If I didn’t want to be here I wouldn’t come.” 

“You’ve never said I am important!” 

Gasp angst who'd have thought.

Is there a tag you like to search for when looking for fanfics to read?

Only if I'm trying to read a specific fic i've read before. I usually just scroll through all the fics til I find one I want to read again.

Do you like to post fics on a schedule or at random?

Random. Gotta keep you all on your toes you know.

What helps you focus when you write?

Really wish I knew haha.

What is your favorite fic that you’ve written?

This is a hard toss up but it's got to be either Before the Sunrise, Raffaela or Nostalgia

Do you write for yourself, for others, or both?

Both. Writing is cathartic and helps me get out my messy thoughts but also I love sharing things with others.

Why did you start writing fanfic?

To get all these ideas out of my head and to help me mentally.

Which character is your favorite to write?

Hmm...I wonder...

Raffi, of course though Emily will always be my baby too.

Which character is the toughest to write?

Sometimes I find Seven tough from a 3rd person pov, but honestly men are just hard to write lmao

Do you write for multiple fandoms? If yes, what is your favorite fic of yours for each fandom?

Well I've listed my CM and Picard faves already but my Voyager fave is probably A Collective of Four

How often do you read your own fics?

So often lmao.

Do you want to write something outside of fanfiction? If so, what about?

Well me and bestie want to write our AU's into books. Princess and Knight AU and Pirate AU. All wlw of course.

If a movie or show were based on your fic, which fic would you choose and who would you fancast?

All the Saffi fics should be real. Just saying. (Well not all of them...)

What inspires you and your writing?

Stupid dumb characters in my head /affectionate, and talking to others.

Do you research for your fics?

Usually if its needed. And it's usually for small little things.

What fics do you prefer on a scale of canon compliant to wildly original?

Probably in the middle. But I'll read near enough anything tbh.

Do you often write about a relationship or focus on an individual?

I usually focus on one character within a relationship with the relationship surrounding it.

Have you included any sexy scenes in your fics? If yes, do you find them easy or difficult to write?

It depends on the vibe tbh. Sometimes it flows a lot easier than others. I do have to write from a giving position usually though otherwise its hard af lmao.

Is it easier to write angst or fluff?

Angst. I never feel like I get fluff right honestly.

What sort of endings do you prefer to write: ambiguous, bad, happily ever after, etc.?

Happy endings even if everythings gone to shit before. Except Before the Sunrise but that's an outlier. Sometimes I'll do ambiguous or bad but I tend to need the happy endings to make me feel better haha.

How many WIPs do you currently have?

Oh no...I don't even want to count. Ones that are written that don't include multichapters? Maybe 5? MC's and just ideas included thats probably in the teens honestly.

Does anyone beta read or edit your fics?

Bestie Blaine is always the best beta and makes my stuff make sense <3

Is there a fanfic or fanfic writer you recommend?

If I had to choose one fic, it would have to be Foundations. Authors, alreadyaccepted, smol_yellowbumblebee, ericine, daxs10thhost, bimichaelburnham, sleeplessrivers, dolcewrites, fenrisranger, thequeerengineer, sgtmac, falltonadir...okay just everyone in the Saffi/Picard tag okay <3

What led to your interest in the fandom?

My partner got me watching the first season of Picard and there were gays so, the rest is history I guess.

Are non-fandom friends aware that you write fanfic?

I am quite open about it haha.

What is the most impactful lesson you’ve learned about writing?

Reading other people's fics and interacting with them is the best way to enchance your own writing.

Do you like writing short fics or long fics?

I love writing long fics but lately that's been an impossible struggle and I've felt kinda like a failure. Last year I wrote something like 70 fics because I did a lot of drabbles. This year I want to focus on longer fics and I have quite a few ideas stored up.

Do you have a writing milestone you’re working towards?

It depends. Sometimes i can look at a chapter and I'll guess how long it is (and then it'll be longer) but I usually go with the flow.

Any advice for writers working through burnout or writer’s block?

As someone who just got out of burnout, its to try something new. I started With Love, A which is a totally different format from what I've done before and it's really brought me out of the slump. Also talking through things with other people is always great.

Would you ever want to write something canon if you got the opportunity?

I would like to make my own canon someday haha.

Is there a favorite trope you like to write?

Hurt/comfort is my beloved.

If someone were to make fanart of your work, what fic or scene would you hope to see?

Polycule cuddle pile. Which one? I have too many to choose from.

[idkwhatimdoingbutslay]

Ranking My 2023 Fics + hints of a planned 2024 fic (that im hoping to actually get done lmao)

I did this last year so I’m gonna do it again 🏃🏾‍♀️

Side note, before I begin, I would love love love to say a huge thanks to all of my readers, everyone who’s been interacting, enjoying and sparing a glance at anything I’ve written over the year. It tends to get really busy sometimes but I push through for you guys so thanks a ton :)))

ALSO I got a beta reader this year and they are one of the swaggiest people on the planet and I def would not be here without ‘em so an extra special thanks to @justicecaballer (who also has a few fics out) 🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾

OKAY LETS GET STARTED

1. dear, hello, salutations, love, sincerely, from, goodbye (8.99999/10). Im lowkey obsessed with this fic????

Like obviously it’s based off of my favourite movie of all time (DONT GET ME STARTED ON TO ALL THE BOYS-) and it also gives me the chance to explore Caitlyn and Vi’s relationships with their parents. Handling Vi’s grief AND being able to research lacrosse (I’ve been watching gameplay for the upcoming chapter lmao), something I’d never do if it wasn’t for this fic, has just been so fun. I still worry about my characterization of Cait and Vi, but I feel like I’m doing a pretty solid job right now. Also this is officially my longest fic to date and I’m glad I’m getting more and more comfortable with descriptions and getting better at pacing. The slow burn is kind of hitting I can’t lie, they’re so in love it hurts!!!! I’ve also been loving writing Caitlyn’s friendships! I’m SO GLAD I decided to write in Kai’Sa I’m obsessed with her. Jayce appearances have been few and far between, but they’ve been quite nice. I’m super excited to have this fic be finished and to get all of my ideas out!! More of Vi’s family dynamic is coming soon 🤭🤭🤭. ALSO, more scenes from the movie and even the book will be included I’m so excited lemme stop yapping!!!!

2. play stupid games, win gay prizes (8.8/10). SO FUN I CANT

This was my first beta read fic and also just one of my favourite fics of mine in general. It is genuinely so fun. I wish I added more festival/pride month vibes, but Caitlyn and Vi annoying each other did it enough I think LOL. That vibe of them just being the biggest nuisances to each other unfortunately didn’t last super long in the show so exploring it in this fic was exciting! The make out scene most definitely hit………. Like come on they’re soooo obsessed with each other it’s embarrassing. The bingo scene was most definitely iconic!!! The twister scene was too! It was just an entire bundle of fun no one gets it. Maybe I’ll post my notes for this fic. Part two…… is in the works…. Expect it by spring maybe?????

3. fix my galentine (7.5/10). Cutie patooties 🤭

I’m sorry but the whole “lemme just break something in my house so hot lady comes over to fix it” just kind of hits to me???? Like Caitlyn was so disastrously down bad it was the cutest thing ever. The reveal of what Mel (the greatest wing woman of all time) asked Vi was just so fun as well. There was no angst or anything in this one, it was just cute valentine vibes and flowers and love and all of those gross stuff so it was great to get out and enjoy. LET THE GIRLS BE HAPPY! I also thought a lot about Caitlyn’s job in this, weirdly. She was Hextech’s lawyer and something about that is just so fun to me lol. Was also thinking about a scene where some pipe bursts in the company building and Vi’s called to fix it and everyone is drooling over Vi but Vi’s just waiting for her job to be done to see Cait in her office and in a suit 🤭. First person was definitely a choice but I don’t think it hurt the fic all too much. ANYWAY, super cute and super fun.

4. who tf is this girl (6.5/10). Anniversaire 🤞🏾

Honestly nothing too interesting. A short little one shot to pair with the first ever fic I wrote and posted on ao3. It was just a fun little thing. I don’t know if Caitlyn would really be a jealous person…. Protective, most definitely, but jealous just doesn’t fit her too much in my opinion. It was nice little thing tho that I still enjoyed writing and finishing. I think I could see a lot of my improvement from the og fic to my this one. I just love their established relationship shenanigans idk let them be a normal couple fr.

5. hunting prize (6/10). Ooooo suffering.

SORRY THIS IS LAST LMAO. This fic was lowkey just exhausting to get through lol. It most definitely is not the worst thing in the world, but I’m starting to realize how draining it is to just write constant suffering. It’s still technically incomplete lmao. The last chapter is supposed to be about a year or more later. Caitlyn wipes out the enforcers and brings in the Wardens and then asks Vi to be the Undercity lead for them as they dance at a ball for the official announcement. I appreciate everyone who stuck with this fic because it took soooo long to actually finish. Whump is just really not my thing lol. I have yet to truly do the canon verse any justice in one of my fics but next year I’m locking in, I swear.

This year has been so great for my fics and everything, so a massive thanks again for all of you friends :))))

MORE TO COME!!! Count on it :)

Idk when I’m finally gonna get this one done but expect it probably mid year!!!????

[godstrain]

ok before i get to writing replies, i have to address the whole "wesker but supreme unhinge brain moments" thing that i sorta touched on earlier today?

so, we know that the t-virus really screws things up. basically zombifies them when the host isn't compatible, which is uhhh a lot (except 10% of people have natural immunity and no one knows why, i guess. is this 10% of the WORLD or of people in the USA or... ???? 10% of the world is actually a pretty big number?? anyway) and this can be seen especially in the ... whatsit, beastmaster's notes- the one that describes what the infection process was like, starting with coherent things and ending with tasty. itchy (horrifying! thanks i read it once and will not again for a while!) we also know the virus wesker was given is a modified strain of the t-virus. we later learn that while it resurrected wesker from death by the tyrant, it DIDN'T fully work, because he is relying on the PG67A/W- on top of that, wesker likely had natural immunity in general (i've addressed his immune system in another post)

he needs the PG67A/W to maintain the superhuman abilities he gained from the progenitor strain, but clearly, other shit must've been going on, too.

we know wesker hasn't aged a day since he infected himself. in the concept art for re1 it also says "wesker is surprisingly the same age as barry, 38" which implies wesker looks younger in general, which may be a side effect of whatever else was being put in his body thanks to the project w (fuck that shit, fuck spencer and also fuck the original wesker dude who was leading that project, i wish u a very fucking perish forever). so on the outside, he seems fine.

on the inside, not so much.

while never as drastic as the researchers who were infected and died at the mansion, wesker's brain suffers a similar decay- and then before he really loses all higher thought process, the virus revives the dead tissue. after infection with uroboros, the condition of his brain decay and revival was less severe, but still there. this is where he becomes erratic and rather immature- because parts of his brain are hecking dying. before uroboros, the symptoms would also affect his motor skills- the best comparison i have is unfortunately huntington's disease (i've worked with a patient with huntington's before and i am still devastated and saddened by what i saw), and the difference is wesker bounces back.

he's well aware of this, too, and it's terrifying for him. the episodes of these symptoms from the virus are short, but for the few days that they're there, it's awful (luckily[?] the longest period was four days, and the episodes are spaced out across many months, so it's like once every 4 months this shit goes down). they're his most volatile days and he also always feels like he wants to crawl out of his skin. he knows what's causing this. he did this to himself. post5, he also suddenly has vivid clarity and understanding of what it was like for everyone who was infected and died at the mansion and that sorta haunts him.

on a related note, wesker's strain of t-virus is only contagious via blood. and even then, since it seems to have been modified for him, any person infected would essentially have a rather unpleasant case of something resembling shingles- which will go away! you know, like shingles. although, neuropathy would be a common long term symptom, but otherwise it sucks but not as much as it COULD suck... he can only infect another person with uroboros if he actually attacks them WITH uroboros and most of that virus' power is spent regenerating his body from uhh being in a volcano lmao so i guess people are in the clear there? thanks for coming to my tedtalk

[andpierres]

I 100% agree we should be careful about what we reblog and be aware of who the terfs are in our community and block them, but can we not pretend it’s easy? I’m sorry but it IS hard, and I’m hoping as a fellow trans person you can understand this. I mean, to make sure someone is not a terf that means possibly subjecting yourself to transphobic posts that can be distressing/dysphoric/triggering/etc. And I’m not saying we should be slacking just because it’s hard, i just want to recognize that it takes a toll. And people could say “You don’t have to go through someone’s posts, you can just go through a blocklist,” but at the same time we preach “do your own research,” and I’m someone who wants to do my own research before blocking (because come on, it’s the internet 🙄). You don’t have to respond to this at all, and I’m sure you said the whole “it’s not that hard” thing because you’re frustrated and I totally get that, just it is hard sometimes… like I just went through that persons blog rn to see what made them a terf and now I wish I could put my brain through the washer machine lmao seeing that shit just really takes a toll. Anyways, again, no hate to you, and no need to respond. you’re one of my favorite artists and I appreciate you for making us aware of the terfs causing harm in our community!

i wasn't really sure how to respond to this, because i do appreciate the kind words (thank you!). but at the same time, i want to, as gently as i can, combat the idea that making our community safer for one another -- particularly for trans women & trans fems -- requires a level of effort that we shouldn't try to put in.

i know it sucks. im subjecting myself to the same posts you are. and that part, unfortunately, never really gets easier, at least it hasn't for me, even in all the years ive been on this goddamn website. what DOES get easier, though, is learning how to recognize terf dogwhistles, and finding tools to use to make the overall process easier, like shinigami eyes. this allows me to spend less time actually hunting on terf blogs, which makes the process both faster and much easier to handle.

but obviously, still, not everyone can do this. particularly trans women!! which is, again, why we have things like shinigami eyes, as well as the work of other people in our community to double check allegations for you. i do think it's important to double check information, obviously -- but if the notes on a post confirm the information presented to you, i do think it's also important, and healthy, to foster a certain level of trust with each other. double check your sources, yeah, but if double checking the sources would do you harm, well... that's why i made the post in the first place!

ANYWAY. the point of me saying all this isn't to shame you or blame you or anything like that -- and im sorry that you had to experience all their bullshit for yourself. maybe framing it as "easy" wasn't the best wording on my part -- rather, i think that it's worth it to invest time in understanding WHY terf beliefs are harmful, why they choose to believe them, the goals of their community and such, because then, instead of simply seeing "x is a terf" and having to scroll on their blog until they all but say "yeah I'm a terf", you can spot patterns and ways of thinking that will tell you someone is a terf even if they don't put that they are one directly on their blog description or something. this is super important when it comes to spotting cryptoterfs especially.

again, you're very sweet, and i appreciate you reaching out. more than anything else, please take care of yourself!

[mcalhenwrites]

Yet another writing-related rant (it's actually a rant lmao)

Okay, I don't want to see "wow let's make sure now more than ever to have positive queer rep" bc while it's good to have that, it's not wrong to have toxic queer characters, and that won't make the fucking fashies like us more!

How about we all just write what we want to write, making sure it's not bigoted*, and stop fucking supporting book bans along the fascists bc if you hadn't noticed, it's after ANY queer rep and ANY rep for people of color.

*And make sure when you're working around this, you're not attacking people who talk about the discrimination they've faced. Work on boycotting bigoted propaganda.

Positive representation is important, but the people who write the less positive stuff aren't your fucking enemy. I fall under the queer umbrella several times, and I've met people who are toxic in that community.

Actually, you know what? I'm a better person than I used to be, but there have been times I've been hurtful or toxic too. I work to be better every fucking day, but I grew up with some shitty people and I used to hurt myself, and in doing so, I was hurting my friends. I would be hard on myself and make fun of things with friends so we could all feel better about ourselves, and do you know what that fucking did? NOTHING GOOD. Sometimes people aren't great. And honestly, someone who isn't great might get better! Someone who was horrible to you might go on to be a better person to other people. As long as they're learning to be better. For those that do harm that requires legal consequences, they need legal consequences. But let's not say "they're not queer" or w/e. Harm is done in all groups.

I'm currently wrapping up a story that has two abusive gay fathers. And before anyone says, "Queer people make better parents" NO ALL PARENTS CAN MAKE MISTAKES

And I've seen plenty of queer people normalize spanking kids, heck I've seen it even when they have spanking kinks. Like, nah, I'm sorry, go fucking read Psychopathia Sexualis cases to see how many found their kink via childhood (and I dislike Krafft-Ebing immensely, but at least he even said "maybe we should stop spanking kids"), look up Rousseau, actually just do any research for an hour and you'll find out how much of a sexual violation that was for so many people when they were kids.

And even if the kids don't find it sexually violating, they can still be messed up from it. It's not effective.

And you'd think(???) with all the queer people who are like "my parents beat the shit out of me when they found out I am gay/trans/etc" they'd be less inclined to be chill about child abuse. But no. Actually. So many still justify it. Practice it. We need toxic stories just as much as positive ones, because it's actually a good sign that if you read something with toxic characters and find it uncomfortable, you recognize that the behavior is bad! This doesn't mean you can't enjoy the story, either! Though maybe you won't, and that's okay!

What's important is that you're like, "Yeah that's not a good way to treat a person IRL, this is interesting to explore in fiction" and stop fucking trying to cancel out everything to please fashies

THEY WILL NOT LIKE YOU EVER THEY WANT TO KILL US ALL

It's why your shitty crap about cutting the B and T and Q out is also just as fucking horrifying. Why it's so curious that we always have to leave the I out! THEY WANT TO END THE L AND G TOO

Ugh I'm so angry.

I have positive representation but damn I have negative representation bc sometimes I need a good fucking cry over my exasperation over the world.

Anyway. Yeah. Today's ruling shouldn't end with "oh my god positive representation of queer people is SO IMPORTANT after today" yeah no let's all be loud and proud, and if someone is truly doing harm, we make sure to take measures to lessen that harm.

I really wish people realized fucked up fiction can be catharsis and informative, and IRL offers some horrifying shit that we sometimes have to write about through fiction to tell our stories or it hits too close to home. I literally was reading a thread about people's experiences growing up in cults/churches just last night and think maybe that's an actual thing to work on fighting in the US.

I'm going to write toxic shit and if you go in thinking that the exposure to it will make you suddenly do terrible things, maybe think about if you weren't already a horrible person going in or why you think fiction is a how-to manual (and never an insight to what has already been done to people). Personally, I can read something awful and go, "Yeah that's wrong, and I have a solid personal moral system that still holds up after I consumed this fiction."

Sorry for the incoherence, this was actually a rant lmao