#idk what to write here tbh

[purrfectly-nina]

IN SEMI-DEFENSE OF JACKSON <3

Jackson hate is a little forced imo cause he’s really just a teenage boy battling depression and grief and is constantly stressed and anxious about things being out of his control for really no reason. Like you have to remember Jackson has known these people for only a couple of months at this point and they bullied him and Exer made his life shit for a good bit of it 😭 now I love Exer that’s my princess and Jackson has made mistakes but it’s what makes him an interesting and dynamic character, people complain all the time that Jackson is boring and one note but he’s really not if you pay attention to his flaws as character traits and not just “oh Jackson here we go again 🙄”

+

For just season 3 stuff so far he’s kept 1. leaving therapy a secret from Pam 2. Not telling anyone about the diary and Used the diary to manipulate Exer (both consciously and unconsciously) and 3. Spent time with the reds as a form of getting information and its kinda manipulation tbh so I just wanted to give my 2 cents on it in defense and criticism of Jackson cause he’s paralleling Exer in a lot of ways and it’s unfair that he gets shit on so much when Exer is loved and praised by the fandom (again Exer is my favourite character).

+

1. Leaving therapy a secret from Pam is not a good thing Jackson is doing, he shouldn’t have kept it from her and he shouldn’t have lied that it wasn’t that big of a deal because a big theme in this comic is that keeping secrets and lying really hurts people and relationships and you need to be open and honest with those you love. That being said it’s a really hard subject that he’s still getting over himself, therapy was a safe space for him where he was finally in control and was heard not just listened to. He’s still getting over this and he could barely even talk to Harry for weeks without feeling horrible so yea it’s a really troubling thing for him to think about. He told the detention kids because sometimes it’s easier to be open with friends who get the situation than your girlfriend who you don’t want to disappoint because she was so happy you were getting better and how do you tell her your world fell apart all over again and you’re scared. I’m not saying this excuses his actions I just think there needs to be a bit more understanding here, Jackson should have told her sooner and tell her that he’s not happy about it but he’s also not ready to talk about it just yet, it’ll be good for him to open up to Pam more instead of trying to keep up an illusion that he’s doing great but it’s a hard thing to shake.

+

2. Telling anyone about the Diary, especially Exer is not fucking easy at all. Some of you are making it sound like if he just told them everything would go smoothly and well and that he’s the bad guy for keeping it hidden. So go on and tell me how exactly you’d tell the person who bullied you over petty reasons that you might have accidentally manipulated and fabricated their feelings and that you’re the reason he apologized, you’re the reason he got a job and started over, you’re the reason he confessed as is dating his boyfriend and that none of it is real and that you did it all by accident. Because that’s exactly what Jackson thinks he did, while I don’t agree with Jackson’s theory he’s convinced of it himself. For all Jackson knows Exer really is that prick back in season 1 and the only reason he changed is cause he wrote it down. That’s a lot of weight on your shoulders especially the whole romance thing I mean Jackson wholeheartedly thinks he accidentally manipulated Exer into falling in love with someone and that’s a very heavy burden to carry cause wtf do you do with that as a 17 y/o depressed child. Not to mention that the Diary is his therapy journal so that’s his one healthy outlet destroyed and he feels guilty about ever coping using it so that only fuels his self hatred and mental health issues. All of this without mentioning he’s still grieving over his mother who gave him the damn thing and now he can’t even have that once connection he has with her because of course it’s tied to Exer the person who’s made his life so difficult up till now. NOW!! Pause, this does not excuse his actions but it does explain them, Jackson is not in the right here because at the end of the day he does need to talk to Ex about it because, accident or not, he’s manipulating him and he needs to know. It’s actually incredibly interesting how much this parallels to season 1 Exer, Exer who started purposely using his magic to cause harm and then slowly losing control and doing it by accident (all while not telling Jackson he has magic which made it hurt so much more) versus Jackson’s harm being on accident at first but now he’s experimenting and knowingly causing changes to Exer. This is a big flaw of Jackson’s, he wants to understand before he takes action but only in ways that benefit him. He wanted to understand Exer’s magic before he told Pam and now he wants to understand his own before he tells anyone and we all saw how that turned out with Pam and the others in season 1/2 so Jack’s definitely going to learn his lesson. Remember that if Exer got that mad cause he was jealous over petty things how do you think Jackson, who thinks he’s one of the only reason Exer became nice, thinks Exer is gonna react to something as big as this!!

+

3. This is a bad thing aaallll around and Jackson needs to stop 😭!!! Jackson hanging out with the reds just because he wants to study Exer is not a good thing but it’s an interesting character flaw!! This goes back to what I was saying earlier, he wants to know and understand and will fixate on it so bad he neglects the consequences. Not only is he harming the reds by manipulating them into thinking he cares and is friends with them he’s also really hurting himself. As much as I would love for them all to be friends again, Jackson just isn’t in that headspace right now where he can. He’s so obsessed with the magic and how it’s affected him that he can’t get over the bullying, he can’t get over how Exer used his magic to hurt him, he can’t get over him hurting Pam, he can’t accept the many apologies, he hasn’t even accepted that Exer wasn’t in control all the time. He just can’t move on. He needs to move on and not because what happened wasn’t hurtful and is all in the past now (it’s been like 2 months since Halloween mind you) but because he needs to let go and prioritize himself instead of holding onto all this anger. He’s not just an asshole who can’t get over being bullied (which like even if he was that’s valid to a degree), he’s so obsessed with regaining control of his life and understanding what the fuck is going on that he’s actively choosing to hurt himself to hang out with people he doesn’t like. He doesn’t have to be their friends and he doesn’t have to forgive them, yes they’ve gotten better and yes they’re sorry but tbh if my bullies apologized and everything I would not forgive them and I’d certainly not be friends with them. They just need to go their separate ways until Jackson knows what he wants. But it’s hard. Being 17 and struggling with mental health (IN THE 80s!!) is very very hard and that’s before you even begin with the magic shit so cut him some slack.

Anyways this was so long and rambley I’m sorry, I just don’t love the Jackson hate I see when he and Exer are so similar but he doesn’t get the grace of being adored and pawed at. Do I love Jackson? Not as much as I do Exer but I get him, I get being a teen trying to save myself while everything around me keeps trying to push me down so I respond in anger and I’m so over everyone being so mean to him. I could go on for ages and make more points but that’s it for now so!!!! Anyways support Paola on patreon 🩷🩷🩷

[nixotinix]

ART !!

(+ a close up & WIP for u)

[mellioops]

Psst if any of yall wanna see my stardew brainrot i have a side blog @meoops :3

[vilintciay]

" Ohh mmfp- FUCK..! Waka- TOSHI!.. Ahgg- God-."

Your eyes rolled back to the back of your skull, drool seeping out from the corner of your mouth. Above you was Ushijima Wakatoshi, ruthlessly pounding into you from behind, keeping both your arms pinned behind your back with a grip of a single hand as he pressed you further and further into the mattress from how hard he was fucking you stupid.

Your head laid turned to the side, cheek pressed up on cushion below as you gazed up at him with your ass in the air, stood and displayed all for him to bury his thick cock balls deep inside your tight, sloppy wet cunt.

"Ahhg- mnpff- mm- yeah! Ohh fuuckk! Yes, yes, right there!"

You mewled and cried out with pleasure, moaning and whining under him while his expression stood the same. A stoic and blank face with dark and lust filled eyes taking up each bounce and jiggle of your tits, ass, and thighs whenever he'd pull out his thick cock out of your tight cunt, plunging back in hard and rough. Grunting only occasionally.

You were out of it. So fucking out of it that you didn't even notice the sound of your apartment's door opening, light shuffling coming from the living room as someone called out a greeting. But it didn't reach you. Too fucked up and cock drunk that you could only focus on the way his hand would lift in the air to land a harsh and almost skin-tearing smack on your ass, squealing with delight as pain mixed with pleasure, stomach twisting tighter and tighter.

Your orgasm was building up fast, so fast you could barely catch up with your own breathing, slowly coming undone beneath him as you writhe, screaming out his name so loud you weren't surprised if you'd get at least 10 noise complaints from your neighbors. Oh wait.. that's right. This wasn't your house.

With a full body shudder, you felt the knot in your stomach completely burst, squeezing down hard on his pulsing cock as you squirted all over him and the bed below before slumping over and panting. What was I thinking of again?

Oh right, this wasn't my house. This... Wasn't my house?

... Oh. Right. It was his house. But only I didn't live here anymore.

It was only then you'd snap out of your daze, the door to the bedroom opening, your head snapping to look over at the door way. There stood a familiar woman, looking dumbfounded.

"Babe..?"

You were now his ex-girlfriend after all.

[domjaehyun]

https://x.com/nctzoro/status/1884280714981695989?s=46&mx=2

a jaehyun ver. for I Love Nerds perhaps 🤓☝🏻??? going crazy over him in glasses ever since the content dropped HOW IS HE REAL??? 😭

nerd jaehyun earnestly and eagerly telling you allllll about the intentionality behind music theory and whole time you’re just thinking about how good he would feel on top of you.

when you decide to cut to the chase and put your hand on his leg, he just freezes, looks at it, looks up at you, and then smiles widely and goes back to talking (he has no idea what you’re doing). you’re getting a teeny bit frustrated at this point so you slip your hand up higher and maybe you even squeeze a little bit.

fortunately, this definitely gets his attention, and his sentence is rudely interrupted by his sudden, flustered coughing fit. whole time he’s coughing, his torso is pivoting and moving this way and that but you can’t help but notice that he’s doing everything in his power not to move the one leg that you’re holding onto while his body is wracked with coughs and dry hacking.

as ridiculous as he looks right now, his loud medical emergency unwittingly drawing attention to yourselves tucked away in the corner of the library, you can’t help but be endeared to him.

“jaehyunnnn,” you whine when he’s done coughing up what sounds like his gallbladder or some other internal organ. “i wanna go back to my dorm.”

his face falls—and it falls fast. “oh, i’m sorry,” he mumbles woefully, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose as he sniffs once and looks away from you.

“sorry?” you ask, confused. “for what?”

“for talking too much and making you want to go home,” he answers sadly, his brows starting to knit together in the middle as his emotions get the better of him. “sorry, i just got so excited, and i know you don’t care, so i shouldn’t have gone on the way i did—“

“jaehyun, i think you’re confused.” you say slowly. “i’m going to my dorm,” you explain, pointing at yourself.

he nods slowly in understanding.

you turn your hand to point at him. “and you’re going to my dorm.”

his eyes widen and he turns to look at you so suddenly that it sends his glasses slipping halfway down his nose. “i’m going to your dorm…?” he asks, a tinge of excitement and relief creeping into his voice.

“yes.” you nod.

“with you.”

“yes, with me.” you hold back your laugh.

“we’re going together.”

“yes, sir.”

“to your dorm.”

“indeed.”

“where we’ll be together… alone…”

“most definitely…”

“in your dorm.”

“you know what?” you chuckle, rising to your feet. “you take as long as you need to process this. i’m gonna head to the bathroom and you should be packing up or packed by the time i get back, okay?” you run your fingers through his hair, ruffling the strands into a messy, tousled look that screams effortlessly handsome, and if you’re not mistaken, he shivers a bit at your touch when your nails reach the back of his neck. experimentally, you drag your nails along the nape of his neck and lightly across the side of his jaw until you’re playfully tugging at his earlobe affectionately.

you maybe expected a giggle or a chuckle perhaps from him; maybe even a “stop, that tickles” or something of the sort. what you didn’t expect in the slightest was for his eyes to roll all the way back into his head and flutter shut as he lets out a low, delighted groan.

“oh?” you giggle, stroking the shell of his ear with one finger.

“holy shit, keep doing that,” he grunts.

“mm, yeah? feels good?” you can’t hide your smile and the smugness it’s tinted with, but it’s not like it matters—jaehyun is so wrapped up in your ministrations on his head that his eyes are shut tightly and his mouth is hanging open ever so slightly, shallow, almost ragged breaths leaving him.

“feels so good.” he admits in a slurred mumble as you proceed to scritch and scratch gently at his head with one hand and massage his ear with the other. to your surprise, he reaches up and loops an arm around the backs of your legs, pulling you between his slowly parting legs to bring you directly in front of him.

“hi,” you hum sweetly, and he looks up at you, pupils blown out with desire and an utterly overwhelmed look on his face.

“hi,” he mumbles shyly, watching you intently. when you resume massaging his ear, he turns his head in so his lips can press against the inside of your forearm. it starts off slowly, a brushing against each other so light that you think you imagined it. but when he sighs softly, his warm breath moistening your skin before he unmistakably presses his lips to your skin, you know it’s not all in your head.

he looks up at you for a reaction and when you just watch him wordlessly, intrigued and a bit amused with your head cocked to the side, he does it again. and again, lips shifting further up your forearm—and further still, until his lips are smooching the crook of your arm and you’re giggling in surprise—and even still, his fingers hurriedly pushing up your sleeve so he can kiss the newly exposed flesh.

“jaehyun,” you hum to get his attention.

“mm?” he hears you, you’re pretty sure, but it’s obvious he’s not truly listening as he kisses a path from your inner elbow, down your forearm, and to your hand, where he places kiss after kiss after kiss—your wrist, the very center of the palm of your hand, the fingertips of your middle and ring fingers, and when you attempt to pull your hand away to tilt his head up so you’re looking at each other, he grumbles something whiny in protest and his eyes scan your surroundings as if he’s looking for something.

your curiosity gets the better of you and you can’t help but ask. “jaehyun, baby, what are you looking around for?”

“i wanted to make sure you and i were actually alone and that nobody’s watching us.” he murmurs, but there’s an urgency to it you haven’t heard from him before, and that coupled with the dark, unwavering look in his eyes only piques your interest further.

“why?” you say slowly, dragging the word out a bit to emphasize your confusion.

“so i can do this,” he mumbles, eyes darting briefly around for good measure before he’s clutching the hand he’s been kissing and bringing your fingers to his mouth, pressing soft, gentle kisses to each pad of your fingers as you giggle shyly in delight. “feels good?” he murmurs, and you are absolutely certain you’re not hallucinating the suggestive, teasing lilt to his voice.

“yeah,” you sigh blissfully, and he chuckles with your fingers still pressed to his lips.

“what about this?” he doesn’t even give you time to reply before he’s leaning forward and taking your middle and index fingers into his mouth. you gasp in surprise—because of course you do; the very hot music nerd has you between his legs and your fingers in his warm, wet mouth and while you want this, oh, so very badly, this is not how you anticipated it to go.

he’s sucking on them eagerly, fingers looped tightly around your wrist so you couldn’t yank it away even if you wanted to. when his tongue comes into play, the mischievous wet muscle gliding along your fingers and swirling around them, you realize you might just be a goner.

he smirks—yes, smirks—when a small moan escapes you, and he slowly pulls your fingers from his mouth but doesn’t release your hand from its position, your fingertips dangling pointlessly just a breath away from his waiting mouth.

to your surprise, he stands up and haphazardly shoves his laptop and notebook in his bag before slinging it over his shoulder. he stretches his hand out for your bag, which you hand him readily without even really processing it fully. with a firm grasp on your bag and his bag securely on his back, he nods to you in agreement and starts to lead you out of the library.

“where are we going?” you wonder aloud as he leads you through the shelves and study tables with a sureness, a confidence and an energy that, once again, you don’t think you’ve ever seen from him.

“your dorm, baby. you forgot so soon?” he has the absolute audacity to tease you in response, a playful grin on his face as he regards you carefully.

all you can do is chuckle in response, now eagerly anticipating the moment you can get your revenge.

[fzjp]

Thinking about something angsty for coalecroux and this one... is kind of a heavy oof

It's based/inspired by a post about alligator's life expectancy versus a genasi's and if i can remember that post id link it here (and if you know it please send it to me in my DMs or replies here thank you) (edit: post was found!!! thank you quillst!!!! It was you!!!!)

Mentions (more like the main topic tbh) of death and loss, alcoholism

So I've been thinking about either Gideon or Kremy dying first, after their adventure in the feywild, they paid off their debt to Mr Garou, open up Carnivale Lecroux again or living off Mr Rosloth's (is that how his name is spelled idk) reward money

Cuz if Kremy dies first, I feel like Gideon would drink his weight's worth in alcohol daily til he dies from alcohol poisoning and/or from his drunken stupor he dies from a fight

And I know this wouldn't work cuz of the spell's description and duration BUT WHAT IF

Kremy casts Suggestion on Gideon and tells him in his dying breath, as his dying wish to his business partner, partner-in-crime of a husband, "Gid, would you kindly live for me?"

And Gideon just... lives. For as long as Kremy's suggestion lets him... and then he reunites with Kremy

If Gideon dies first, Kremy would continue living. After all, The Good Baron promised him an afterlife...

ALTHOUGH, Kremy would be more closed off to other people, even the Krew. Forcing his smiles, faking his laughs, he can hide his feelings behind his mask right? Why would other people should know he's suffering inside? He's living his life for the sake of the contract...

If and when he were to face an opponent that would be his last, he'll go guns blazing, have a "try and kill me, i beg you to kill me, end me from my misery"

Hopefully, after death, he reunites with Gideon, Gideon waiting for him by the end of Baron's domain and they enter together

[diamond-rozie]

danny died bc he tripped and accidentally turned on the portal? actually that was the reaction waves of krypton finally dying reaching earth. the wave of kryptonite coincidentally gave danny his powers.

ghost form? thats actually his body's reaction to the sudden surge of power (which includes shape shifting). his phantom form is what he looks like as a "kryptonian".

he doesn't rly align w the other supers? thats bc each kryptonian family has their own source (aka core) for their powers. the s on superman's design means hope and prosperity, and is the symbol of the house of el. which is why kryptonite (formed by the death of their planet/ Disparity) weakens them

danny isn't from the house of El. his fam represented life/resilience, which is why he's weakened by blood blossoms, created by gruesome death. and also y danny can see the dead kryptonians and interact w them. (his house ruled over/ controlled the phantom zone???? maybe)

clark was ecstatic to find out that the yj's newest recruit was a kryptonian. danny was surprised when the scans/mandatory physical said he was actually an alien. bruce is happy for clark, but isn't happy to know that apparently kryptonite isn't an effective contingency plan. konner doesn't know how to feel abt his new team mate.

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

Title: The Tradition of You and Me

Pairing: Alex Turner/Miles Kane

Summary: One summer, Alex and Miles watch the Euro Cup together. It becomes something of a tradition. Tags: Fluff, Smut, Developing Relationship

⨯ . ⁺ ✦ ⊹ ꙳ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹ . * ꙳ ✦ ⊹

so a couple of months ago @daddy-long-legssss made this post about miles and alex watching the euro cup together in miles's mr bridger designs and... well, this happened. it was meant to be a short drabble fic, but it's me, so naturally feelings got involved and it's now 4,000+ words 😅

i know it's been taking forever for me to post the next chapter of four walls (i'm so sorry, it really is SO nearly there, but it probably will still be about a week before it's actually ready for posting), so i thought i'd share this in the meantime! i hope you enjoy, if you feel like it then feedback would absolutely make my day 🥰

[unordinary-diary]

Seraphina and Arlo: The Brainwashing of High Tiers

Exposition:

— Remi, Episode 50.

There is a heavy implication that Seraphina and Arlo were raised in much the same way. The pressure on Seraphina comes from her parents, so I’ll extrapolate that the same goes for Arlo. This raises the question: how do the authorities create such a strong societal pressure on such a small percentage of the population? Most high tiers will probably not know any other high tiers besides their parents. Take Wellston Private High School for example: it’s the most prestigious private school around, and canonically has the “highest concentration of high tiers in the region”. There are six high tiers in Wellston. Apply this to god tiers specifically, and there are only three. Not to mention that this current group of students is uniquely strong, even for Wellston. In Rei’s senior year, he was the strongest at 5.8 max.

So much of this brainwashing relies on the parents to do all of the work, and it only takes one or two people to break the cycle. So how are the authorities creating this immense pressure? One tactic could be by isolating high tiers. There is a very widespread concept that one shouldn’t associate with those outside their level range. A caste system like this that affects everyone is much easier to create and maintain than an expectation for a small group, and it also means that high tiers are only being influenced by those who are also high level. This creates an echo chamber. I’ve researched cults and how they brainwash victims, and the first step in the process is isolating them in exactly this way.

But, if there are so few high tiers, how the hell are they supposed be isolated from other groups? The answer is that high tiers are just isolated in general. Take a look at Arlo: his only friend is Remi, and even her, he keeps at an arm’s length. Arlo is only close with Remi in the first place because he was close with Rei, who, at the time of meeting Arlo, was presumably close in level with him. [EDIT: I forgot about Holden, which I think says a lot about his relevance. He is kept at more than an arm’s length and doesn’t seem to have any actual influence on Arlo, let alone a deep relationship. He is also not presented as an equal.] Take a look at Seraphina: before meeting John, she didn’t seem to have any friends other than possibly Arlo. Seraphina and Arlo pre-John seemed to have had more of a professional relationship, and while they were not close in level, Arlo did fit the bill of being a fellow god tier, and strong enough to also be brainwashed.

Now let’s look at Remi. In episode 60, Cecile says to Remi: “And yet here you are... Always hanging around those two monkeys, Blyke and Isen. Letting them treat you as an equal even though you’re in a completely different league.” This struck me as odd because, aside from Cecile herself, the Wellston students closest in level to Remi were Arlo, Blyke, and Isen. And who is she friends with? She actually was doing a pretty good job at following that social convention, unless Cecile wanted to be friends with Remi, which she clearly didn’t. But... her friends were still not close enough to her level. Was she supposed to just not have friends at all? The answer seems to be a resounding yes. Can you think of any genuine friends that Cecile has either?

Friendship simply isn’t considered a necessity for high tiers.

But... why is it that Arlo and Seraphina were brainwashed differently? Creating a societal norm for an isolated group of people is one thing, because those people’s mindsets feed into each other. Putting pressure on individual families to keep them in line, but doing it all in different ways? That would be near impossible. My theory is that Seraphina recieved the typical high tier brainwashing, and that Arlo was raised differently because he was being groomed to work for the authorities. Seraphina didn’t have a set career path planned out for her, but if she’s trying to be “perfect” by the standards of those controlling her, she’s bound to end up going in a direction that pleases them. Arlo on the other hand was specifically planned to become an authority figure. That’s why his brainwashing is so centered on leadership. Also, growing up with direct contact to the authorities makes it more possible for them to customize his brainwashing in this way.

But does all of this apply to high tiers in general, or is it specific to god tiers? Let’s take a look at the high tiers in Wellston. We have Seraphina, John, Arlo, Terrence, Remi, Cecile, and Blyke. John is a unique circumstance because he wasn’t raised by high tiers, so we’ll cross him off the list. Terrence was also unique, so we can cross him off as well. Remi was different from the norm as well. Why is that? Well, Remi actually wasn’t raised by high tiers either. Rei said on screen that both of his parents were elites. We can cross Remi off. Blyke doesn’t fit the bill either, but that’s easy to explain. He was an elite for a large part of the story, and he shot up rather quickly. We don’t know much of his family, but he probably wasn’t expected to be a high tier at all, and was raised as an elite. (All of this also serves to emphasize how much of this brainwashing comes from a person’s parents.) That leaves only Seraphina, Arlo, and Cecile to look at.

Cecile does seem to have high tier brainwashing, but it’s not nearly as intense as with Seraphina and Arlo. She doesn’t seem “obsessive”, and she wasn’t one of the examples Remi mentioned in chapter 50. It’s clear that high tiers are brainwashed in general, but god tiers are kept on a much shorter leash. This makes sense, obviously, because keeping a population in control like that is less necessary the lower the level. However, it’s also a chicken an egg situation: god tiers are both more important to keep in control, and also easier to keep in control. It’s important to note just how many exceptions we had to cross off. People like Remi and Blyke aren’t actually that unusual— a lower leveled high tier is much more likely to have non-high tier parents, or to have not always been a high tier themselves, or just in general, to have way more day-to-day interaction with non-high tiers. The brainwashing gets more and more diffused the lower down the ladder you go.

[eiro00]

I wanted to make another design, this time about Elden Ring and I thought Varre would be funny to do for clothes and bags

🩸🌹🩸🌹🩸

[prince-liest]

This one's for half moon anon, who inadvertently helped me figure out exactly how I wanted to write this scene.

[rainc0at]

noooooo noooooooooo ive been cursed with a hyperfix on brassic now nnnnnnnnooooo

[southern--downpour]

okay first thoughts. i dont HATE the ending i just feel like it needed more time in the season to reach the conclusion it did

[darehearts]

in case anyone was wondering about mom's operation,  it went well and she's resting  💛

[nostalgia-tblr]

"are people not into that?" i ask, after posting my weird niche shit to the internet, despite knowing it to be weird niche shit.

[tangents-within-tangents]

Would that there was a faithful, accurate adaptation of Dracula so that Jonathan Decker and Alan Seawright could discuss the nontoxic masculinity, healthy friendships, and the BEST MARRIAGE RELATIONSHIP IN FICTIONAL HISTORY but nooo!