#i have 0 friends and this is why
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im so cringe
#beavis and butthead#beavis x butthead#beavhead#art#old beavis#old butthead#beavis and butthead fanart#my art#im losing my mind#my artstyle changes each post im dead serious#i cant draw old ppl im so sorry yall#someone needs to put me down#i have 0 friends and this is why#im trying my best#happy pride month btw 🌈
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what are some of your most minor pet peeves with hellaverse?
this is a funny question. i like it
whining about silly things under the cut
the white on imps sometimes being scars and sometimes not throws me off because i can never tell what's meant to be subtle indications of a characters history (especially fun for bg designs imo) and whats like. a spot
i honestly think the main 3 in helluva have pretty good design synergy with each other and it makes me hate loona's design because she throws off every group shot
niffty being designed so similarly to the morningstars (stark white skin with red cheek spots) bugs me more than it should
it wasn't so bad in his first appearance iirc but ever since then asmodeus consistently gets drawn with a really tiny head and i can't not notice it
i struggle to really articulate why and this is probably dumb and snobbish of me but the form everyone gets where they get bigger and scarier being called 'full demon' just feels oddly juvenile to me. what does that even mean. full demon. are they like, half demon at their basic self? make up a cool word instead. it sounds like something i'd have written into my cool death reaper umbreon oc at age 9. i hate it. i dont even know why. it just sounds so dumb to me. like peak 'a child wrote this lore'. watch out guys im going full human (permanently injuring a muscle in my body because i stretched slightly funny while over the age of 25)
this feels mean to say but cherri's voice actor doesn't do a very good australian accent at all and it's incredibly distracting if you're even remotely familiar with how it should sound. similarly maybe it's just auditory processing issues on my end but i can't even tell what accent valentino is meant to have
his design is otherwise fine comparatively but i hate the eyes on pentious' tail. breaking up his shape and like. you slither on those. floor in your eye. at least 10 floor hairs in your eyes. i dont care if theyre just markings i hate them
remember when viv said vaggie's name wasn't vagina and then canonised her name as vagina (the only lesbian main character across both shows btw) and also instead of changing her name for real after she restarted her life from scratch she just changed the pronunciation instead of just the whole fucking name, so like clearly it bothered her just not enough to change it fully like she for some reason wanted to keep in part the name 'vagina' given to her by a misogynist man she hates-
i'm irrationally irritated that emily and sera's underwhelming. 'full angel' forms i guess turn up for a split second, it felt so weird and useless to reveal them now for nothing
in fact why is every angel we meet personally in heaven in s1 a normal humanoid even though there's a diverse variety of designs in the background. imo adam is the only one who has an excuse to just be some guy. furthermore where are st peters fucking ears. why were ears deliberately ommitted on his design and no one elses. he has no fucking ears viv
saint peter
#helluva boss critical#hazbin hotel critical#thats it. just st peter.#abt the niffty/morningstars one#i watched hazbin with a friend who is very offline and 0 clue about fandom in general#as well as the friend who held me at gunpoint to watch helluva#and the non-fandom one thought they were secretly related the whole time#bc she 'didnt get' why they looked so close#so somewhat vindicated in my dumb baby bitching there lmfao#i could probabyl go on but i'll cut it there i have a lot of annoying little crybaby things i dont like bc i myself#am deeply annoying#ask
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everyone’s favorite freak, Academy addition!
#my friend and i have jumped on the ‘Viktor used to smoke before he got sick’ bandwagon#and i LOVE IT#also can we talk about how STUPID the pants of the uniform are???? WHY DO THEY LOOK LIKE THAT#i literally spit this pose out with 0 planning and prep and i’m BAFFLED#the power of a year of anatomy studies and 2 Celsius’s i guess#anyway#love him#i fucked up proportions a bit but yk#viktor#viktor arcane#viktor art#viktor arcane fanart#arcane#arcane fanart
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When i say i like the dilf + twink dynamic, i DON'T mean radioapple
#And lucifer isn't even a dilf#He's a twink with tumblr sexyman traits!#anti vivziepop#anti hazbin hotel#hazbin critical#hazbin hotel critical#I don't get why people ship radioapple#I guess they wanted to pair lucifer with someone that wasn't lillith#Some of my friends ship radioapple and i have to pretend i don't mind when in reality#It's torture#0 disrespect to my friends tho#Anti radioapple
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Raughhh I'm fine rn but frustrating to think that I haven't been able to like - just relax and enjoy things lately cause I'm too busy overthinking and having a constant anxiety attack ( exaggeration ) about nothing
#like can i pls just#live in the moment#broooo#its so augh#this is a vent but an unserious one#just pre-emptive cause i know ill probably be havung a meltdown tomorrow evening#i am prepared for it#in theory#likely i will forget all this and have 0 rational thoughts#abd if youre wondering why i will have one#its cause im playibg a game that i love with friends that i love#and FOR SOME REASON i have had a meltdown after every single session#genuinely dont know whats wrong with ne#but im learning how to Deal™#yay#anyway anxiety is exhausting so if you know someone with real bad anxiety you should hug them or snthn#but also explain why cause they might assume the worse#just saying#also this is queued cause im going to bed#NEVERMIND I FUCKING POSTRD IT ON ACCIDENT
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contemplating deleting my blog soon I might make a new blog but idk
#.bdo#i just need to work on some insecurity issues is all. been on a long self journey this year#can't shake the feeling that every time i say anything it's wrong somehow#and there is some reality to that. i have been wrong several times I've even been downright mean to people over misunderstandings#i just haven't been able to break out of the habit of feeling permanently embarrassed about every small mistake I've ever made#& old insecurities from my childhood are resurfacing#like when i was a kid/teen and no one would ever tell me when i was breaking social cues but they'd make fun of me behind my back#i have 3200 followers and most of my posts get 0 notes sometimes i get 1-5 so it makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong#i end up deleting a lot of them...#almost every post of mine that's gone viral was just a screenshot or picture saved from somewhere else....#and the times that i have gotten attention over a post that stands up for people who aren't like me it makes me terrified#that i look like i'm trying to play a savior role or like i'm virtue signaling#i have a few good mutuals who i love so much and that's why I'm still here#it's also the only social media i use currently#but it does really hurt when i put a lot of thought into something like spending hours making a funny meme or a thoughtful post#just to find out that the only people who find them interesting is my extremely small circle on here if anyone at all#it's so dumb i shouldn't be feeling like this over fucking numbers....it's not even real#i find a little bit of (petty) solace in the fact that there are people on here who are loudly and repeatedly saying way more embarrassing#shit than I've ever said#but even then when i know someone is absolutely wrong it makes me feel nervous like what if im the next person to fuck up that bad#and i find out through public ridicule#well that actually kinda did happen on here once but not on that scale#last year i sent someone something i thought was funny and they sent back an 'ok'#and then immediately made a huge long post about how you shouldn't talk to strangers like you're already friends#called it parasocial behavior...got tens of thousands of notes and i knew it was about me...#i wholeheartedly agree some people go too far with parasocial behavior but i never fully understood what part of what i said/did was wrong#and i went back to feeling like the kid who never found out they were doing something wrong until they heard that they got made fun of#i don't even attempt to make new friends on my own on here anymore because i'm terrified of that happening again#almost all of the people I've become friends with on here came to me first and i love and appreciate them for that#but even then i feel too nervous to socialize that often bc i never find out/realize that i fuck up until later on
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To find a friend is to find someone like myself, someone who is very similar, yet a bit different somehow. It is to see a soul that is almost like a mirror of my own, a soul who can see things in almost the same way that I see it. This is one reason why friendships are so vital. Friends help validate our perspective about life and the world we live in. They help us see the meaning we seek. They help us find the truth we’re looking for. And that is why all the other qualities that other people say about friends depend only on this very foundation. They say that friendship is trust. But how do you trust someone who cannot share the core of who you believe you are? They say that friendship is camaraderie. But how could anyone be a good company to you when they cannot look into your soul? Friends understand one another’s soul, that’s the full meaning of it.
— the ultimate guide when a friend breaks your heart by jocelyne soriano
#friendship#platonic love#platonic relationship#relationship anarchy#like the article is not relationship anarchist necessarily but the way it approaches friendships is really beautiful tbh#like it gives the importance that they have#why say friend or any other category when you can explain how someone understands your soul/your self#can you be my friend if you don't care to understand my soul#idk idk#going to a friend fight rn with my ex situationship#like we get along really well so I wanted to mantain the friendship but goddamit I feel like he doesn't care#and takes things for granted#like he doesn't care about being a good friend#like 0 effort from his part#words words words#fountain pain#threads and ties
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pls i need to provide updates
#basically yesterday night was chaharshanbe suri . which is a solar new yr tradition where we let go of the past suffering in our year#and like...start the new yr w fresh vigour . anyway so my friend was at the event and we were abt to leap over the fire#and she was like bro im im glad u blocked her (situationship) etc etc . and then. my phone started vibrating. and i look at it. and my f#friend looks at it. and its her. and were both like what the fuck?? i blocked her things r Over and anyway so i pick up the phone and shesl#acting like nothing happened (bc nothing DID happen for her) and she was like ohh ur doing chaharshanbe suri im not doing anything etc what#are ur new yr plans so i jusr .IDK WHY I DID THIS . but ig i didnt wanna come off as like lonely i said probably hanging out w family and#friends maybe reading poetry together . et cetera and she was like wait that sounds so fun why didnt u invite me!#LIKE WDYM YOUVE BEEN CONSISTENTLY MAKING IT CLEAR U DONT WANT TO BE IN MY PRESENCE . and i told her that after#everything i thought she didnt want to see me again and she was like you always think that 😐 . like. ?? ok anyway so she expects me to#invite her . and like. there is an above 0% but sub-5% chance she will actually show up . but the panic that gripped me#i started making calls to my friends asking them if they can come on the 23rd bc there must be an event and also i asked my mother#and she said actually yeah i am doing a thing on the 23rd :D it involves over 16 ppl (we live in a v small flat) of which like...7 are kids#so you wont have space to be in ur own room let alone invite others. which tbh like ...being around a bunch of loud kids doesnt seem fun fo#any of my friends or me etc so i thought maybe i should arrange things so that we all go out together and if she shows up she shows up 🤷♀️#but . im so. WHY DID I SAY THAT . i had to panic-call my research partner and ask him to get from oxf to where i live on the 23rd#and when he heard the explanation he like. the light in his voice disappeared 💀 but he potentially agreed so idk#THE ISSUE IS. 23rd im supposed to also have . a date#w this girl that i had a huge crush on when i was 15-16 (posted abt this b4 but id get shitty black coffee in the mornings just to spend a#few more minuted w her each day and she was the cleverest girl in school and she cared abt nothing but her academics but now shes very gay#scraggly homosexual etc etc shes cute) and YEAH IDK#like id have to go there on the date come back fast meet ppl POTENTIALLY (again under 5%) meet situationship girl#like is that even doable#but the thing is it would be so so so funny bc all of my friends dislike her sooo much#.........what if i invited the girl im supposed to have a date w over to hang out w us#god that would be so hilarious and chaotic . i wont do it tho im a mature person x#but it would be soooo funny#I HAVE AN ASSIGNMENT DUE TMRW 12:30PM IT IS 10:49PM RN I HAVENT STARTED IT bc i was rotting sadly in bed#popped a ritalin pill tho so here we go x#i have found myself in a state of such sheer agony and rage and sorrow and grief over this girl that atp i feel like#its just so entertaining . like i feel vaguely over it? ik nothing will come of it so its like just . have fun . vibe
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okay but Sirius who has a blind spot the size of Russia for Regulus. Like, guys it's not his fault if he's supporting Voldemort, it's our family's. It's not his fault if he's turning into a Death Eater, it's because of who he's hanging out with. It's not his fault if he's getting sucked into a blood purist cult, it's because he's too soft, too kind, too naive, too stupid to push back against what they've been taught. He's a good person at heart, Sirius swears, and makes excuses.
But also, Regulus having an equally Russia-sized blind spot for Sirius. It's not his fault if he's getting distant, it's because he's alone in Gryffindor without support. It's not his fault if he's questioning everything they know is true, it's because of his so-called friends. It's not his fault if he's becoming a blood traitor, it's because of the mudbloods and the half-breeds and the blood traitors and fucking Potter. Regulus arguing with his parents for the first time because they can't disown Sirius it's just letting them win and we can't let them keep Sirius.
Sirius distancing himself more and more from his family the more hateful Regulus gets (look at what they're doing to his brother!) and Regulus growing into more and more of a blood purist the more Sirius distance himself (they're stealing his brother, they need to get rid of them!).
And neither of them realizes it either.
#hp#rambles of my soul#tbh i do see them as being really close as kids#regulus getting upset when he can't go to hogwarts with sirius#and then getting angry and jealous when sirius comes back and he has (internal gag) friends#like he's he not enough? why would sirius need them when regulus is right there?#regulus never grew out of feeling replaced bc his brother got friends: the family drama#sirius is so annoyed bc he doesn't understand what's regulus' problem is#so he spends more time with his friends bc regulus is not fun to be around anymore :/#so they end up never getting close again bc too much resentment and 0 communication#although a regulus lives au where he has to confront the fact that he lost sirius bc of his own actions would be pretty funny#like uuuugh okay he can come to term that he was wrong about the blood purist thing sure fine no problem#but now he has to (UGH) play nice with his brother's friends to get something of a relationship with him back???#the horror he would have rather died actually#anyways#it's 4am i'm rambling everything's fine#regulus black#sirius black#hc
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Real pretentious for rusties to call themselves burgundy…you don’t see any other caste arguing about what they’re called :////
}:0|
#YKNOW YEAH YOU DO ACTUALLY }:0(#RUSTBLOODS A SLUR FOR US BRONZE AND BURGUNDIES }:0|#PEOPLE FORGET THAT }:0|#ALSO YOU DO SEE OTHER CASTES ARGUING ABOUT WHAT THEYRE CALLED }:07#LIKE CALLING INDIGOS OR CERULEANS BLUE }:0|#IVE SEEN A LOT OF DEBATE OVER WHICH ONE IS CALLED THE BLUE CASTE }:0|#EVEN THOUGH ITS A TITLE FOR BOTH }:0|#ITS ACTUALLY PRETTY MUCH THE SAME SITUATION AS BRONZE AND BURGUNDIES WITH ''RUST'' BLOOD }:0(#EXCEPT BLUE ISNT OFFENSIVE }:0(#IVE SEEN CERULEANS GET CULLED FOR CALLING THEMSELVES HIGHBLOODS THOUGH }:0|#LIKE NOTHING WRONG WITH THEM EXCEPT THAT }:0|#AS IF A MISCONCEPTION OR DIFFERENCE OF OPINION IS A GOOD ENOUGH REASON TO SEVER THEIR FILIAL LINE }`:0(#EVEN THEN YOU HAVE THE OLD DEBATE ABOUT MUSTARD OR GOLD }:07#WHAT YOU JUST SAID IS LIKE SAYIN' “REAL PRETENTIOUS FOR THE P%%%BLOODS TO CALL THEMSELVES MUSTARDS” }:0|#IM SORRY BY THE WAY GOLD FRIENDS }:0(#BUT MY POINT IS LIKE THATS JUST A SLUR }:0|#THE SLUR IS A SLUR AND ITS GONNA PROBABLY STAY THAT WAY TILL IT GETS SO RECLAIMED PEOPLE FORGET IT USED TO BE A SLUR }:0|#AND BURGUNDIES HAVE THE SHORTEST LIVES OF US WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE MEAN TO THEM DURING IT }:07#YOU REALLY GOTTA STOP CALLIN THEM THAT BUDDY }:0|#IVE BEEN CALLED RUSTIE TONS OF TIMES AND I STILL DONT FEEL SUPER COMFORTABLE SAYING IT CAUSE I KNOW ITS MOSTLY A SLUR USED FOR MAROONS }:0[#LOWEST POINT ON THE HEMOSPECTRUM AND THE SHORTEST LIFE AND YOU GOTTA BE A BULGE TO THEM }:0?#THIS REALLY WAS ONE OF THE }:0[#SHIT TAKES }:0)
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im not that happy with this, made the lineart too thin cuz of the canvas size ig so i messed around and theres no fixing it now so
#dandys world#dandys world flutter#dw flutter#i have 0 thoughts on her#like shes friends with gigi thats all i got#her hitbox is also weird to play as so she's just not my vibe i keep getting hit whenever i try juking and ik its not a skill issue#cuz i can do it with goob pebble tisha etc why not her#anyways back to tagging#redesign#zinkysworld redesigns
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I’m 98% sure gotham is nowhere near close to Britain but I feel like Tim would still have a British accent
British accent is too vague im gonna say tim sounds like he's from Cornwall
#ask#anon#why cornish#bc i have beef with the cornish#a friend of my in uni was from cornwall#most annoying person#she thought that cornwall was on the same level as Ireland on the victims of the english scale#newsflash it aint#and my grans from cornwall#so far a 0/10 on people i personally know from cornwall#so tim can have a cornish accent#and act oppressed
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not to reblog that one jo post but i am special hihi
#also you cant have deep friendships without being hurt sometimes#bc you are still connecting to other people(not yourself)and you will care for each other and need each other differently at times#bc you still live different lives and those thing then affect you differently#and you just won't meet each others needs all of the time#and its that feeling of love and hurt but as long as that hurt isnt like caused on purpose#or on sheer lack of care for you as a person#i dont know#my best friendships were the ones that made me feel all the range of my emotions#and i never regret coming back to them#and that is also why i never regretted (okay lies there was this one time but still mostly) cutting them off if i felt the need#and i dont think they ever regretted coming back to me when i wasnt the perfect friend#(which btw i hate ya novels so much for this bc id see friendships and always be jealous of how good friends some people were#and how they always knew to say the right thing and how i would want to be that kind of friend even tho those were written planned people)#but anyways i was gloating this is my gloating post lol#0 notes to me#this is so silly also pls dont take my friendship experience too seriously like i am not a looking up to person haha
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Animal collection as a hobby, a perfect fit! (Patreon)
#Doodles#SCII#Damned#Pokemon#ZEX#DAX#And a Machamp and Zoroark(?) even I'm not sure lol#It's difficult to pick Pokemon for ZEX because are there any he /wouldn't/ like? Hard to think of any honestly#Mostly just carried-over thoughts from my own Pokemon stuff haha#Friend Balls look like VUX!!! Green with the red inlays (and also orange)!!!#A VUX is shaped like a friend you heard it here first#Now that I think of it why Haven't I made a ZEX friend shape.....Huh#There is already that one doodle of ZEX with a Pokeball also giving it a ''?'' haha I just couldn't help myself <3#And a Portal Cube! ZEX gets all the video game swag#If I was still in an Institute mood (I am - deeply) there was also the fact that Xigbar got a Pokeball at one point#Never saw him use it :0 Wonder what that was all about! Sounds cool :)#Clearly still in an Institute mood considering the final lol#Small silly scribbly based on that one comic haha ♪#What's there to talk about O> They're beautiful and that's that#What Pokemon teams would they have! How could ZEX possibly pick just 6 haha#He has a whole menagerie for a Reason#He Would end up with widely-agreed upon ugly 'mon wouldn't he...........Conkeldurr.......#Machamp is so obvious haha that's just a man! With four strong arms to hold you <3#DAX does not approve of your shenanigans ZEX#When does he ever haha#What would his team be like I wonder hehe ♪ Something loyal and serious hmm#A Stoutland immediately comes to mind for some reason haha#What would most VUX consider cute! An ever-question for me haha
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~
#very random (not snz) haha but#does anyone else feel like their social battery fluctuates like. 0 to 100 with no middle ground or is this perhaps something wrong with me#i will go for weeks without having the social energy to talk to people i love and treasure 😭#maybe it's a lack of dopamine in general idk... would not be thrilled to add another mental illness to the list#but then i'll have a night where i am super talkative and happily reply to half the people i've been talking to#or times when i send off all my responses and sit at my laptop like when are my friends going to reply 🙂 i can't wait to talk to them 🙂#i apologize if you have personally been on the receiving end of my extreme inconsistency 😭#i have been thinking about it recently and i think that's in part the reason why i also gravitate towards long form conversations;#it feels mentally easier for me to deliver a meaningful response once in a blue moon than like sustain that level of#conversational depth on a more consistent basis? because i am inconsistent#but sometimes in the long wait between responses (which i have arguably played a large role in establishing) i feel unexpectedly social and#then feel strangely lonely 😭 (🤡)... truly i feel like i am lowkey a badly adjusted adult#this is not a catastrophizing post (though i did catastrophize slightly more over it in past weeks); just passive musings atp#i go through similar flows with artistic motivation but the highs and lows are not synced with my social energy at all#i think i am someone who likes to analyze my habits just as a whole because i really enjoy optimizing for things 😭 so this tendency in#particular really perplexes me#delete later perhaps because i know this is truly a yap post. (i apologize)#i met with a friend earlier irl and this might be the remnants of the social energy from seeing her or it might be a function of#the drink i had (strawberry matcha 🥰) if you have read this far i apologize personally
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like ive absolutely been aggressive because bipolar literally makes me unable to regulate my mood. ive both cried my eyes out over something that didnt matter and also shoved someone hard into a wall (i was in school) over something small because of my mood disorder. ive absolutely acted entitled because of my mood disorder and i to this day struggle with extremely entitled thoughts due to a delusion of grandeur in my life that if i openly talked about everyone would greatly dislike me because the thoughts are so painfully and severely Me Me Me Me all about Me. bipolar disorder is MOOD disorder that EFFECTS EVERY ASPECT OF YOUR LIFE so im sorry but if you want to be a better advocate you'll have to accept that the person with BD acting weird in public or who punched someone was under the effects of an episode and not try to disarm bipolar disorder to make it appetizing to the people who demonize us. because playing into the ''our disorder isnt bad were Good People Smile Emoji'' is what gets people who Dont act good during their episodes killed or jailed
#i dont trust anybody to speak for me if they want to ignore that there is always a slight chance that i can harm them#because guess what people everyone around you is at a baseline chance of harming you#your partner who loves you so much isnt at 0% chance of harming you. they are at all times at a chance of harming you#your parents your best friends your lovers are all at a baseline chance of harming you#so why do i have to put in more work to assure you im at a 0% chance of harming you when the people around you dont#and you just automatically give them the benefit of believing they wont harm you/that the low chance is good enough for you#but i have to be at absolutely 0% chance for you to feel safe around me. when youre more likely to be hit by your partner than me
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