#i am feeling much better today
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Choose Your Own BL Adventure - Day 14
Options:
Tell Gelt yes. You’re starving and ask him where to meet up.
Ask Gelt how he got your number.
Snow is still on your mind after that near kiss this morning. Ask Gelt if Snow can tag along as well.
Day 13 here.
#2023 choose your own bl adventure#i am feeling much better today#and this is late because i felt well enough to go to the store and buy some food#yall be proud of me i bought actual food instead of just cake#also had an interesting conversation with my manager earlier in our one on one#basically it sounds like management wants me to take some more leadership responsibilities just the little things#and not too much because i still haven't been there long enough to truly have that conversation buuuuut#it sounds like they want to give me a leadership role as soon as they're allowed to which is great#he did say he can't make any promises because obviously it's still too early but also i know how this office works#also i know how good i am at my job so it's not surprising in the least to have that conversation#you're welcome for the life update in the tags of this post lol
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They're out and going to get some tamales (drawn while craving tamales)
and to everyone who has ever sent me messages or tags saying that they like how I draw meiko, I love you ❤
#Vocaloid#Meiko#Kaito#piko utatane#iroha nekomura#Also thank you for those who have helped so much I was able to eat today too not tamales but am feeling a lot better !#Doodles
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right now i'm very torn between "taking critique is important as an artist and it's not an attack on me personally" and "people commenting about my same face syndrome under my posts upsets me an unreasonable amount and i wish they would stop doing it"
#ramble#sorry i am not having a good art day today#i'm TRYING i promise#this is 100% a me problem and i hate it#i think it's because when i have a Problem with my art. i need to fix it INSTANTLY#and that's not how art improvement works#idk why it gets to me so much i can't explain it#even if it's polite and means well it makes me feel weird and i don't know why#maybe because i thought i was way better about it than i used to be but right now i'm getting it way more#yes i know posting art means you have to take people's opinions#but how do i say 'please do not leave lengthy critique under my art that i make for fun when i didn't ask for it' w/o sounding like an ass#i just feel like. i would never go to a fic and point out all the writing mistakes in the comments if the author didn't ask for it. idk#i'm fighting really hard not to yell 'IT'S MY ART STYLE' bc that's not an excuse obvs
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#sleep token#a smiling vessel#using this to say a few things...idk if i am going to be here tonight#i woke up at 3 am and i have been awake ever since and also i need to work today so idk#i feel much better when i stick to my sleeping pattern XD#but i also want to be here and see what is going on...damn it
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click for better quality!
it's this way! / squirrelpaw and leafpaw
#my art#do not copy trace or steal#squirrelflight#leafpool#warriors#warrior cats#wc#waca#wc art#IM SORRY THIS TOOK A WHILE sufferer of the stardew valley fixation and college u_u#IM GETTING MORE COMFORTABLE RENDERING which is cool but im still testing the limits of what works and what doesnt so .#REGARDLESS I AM SUPER DUPER STINKIN HAPPY WITH HOW THIS TURNED OUT#you are not immune to me constantly drawing leaf and squilf#i belieeeve theres one more coming and then ill be back to regular schedule#and that will mean either silly little/medium to low effort things or radio silence#did i tell yall i have an exam next week for algebra and i have no clue whats going on. its cobwebs in my brain#but other than that classes are going very well and i am enjoying second semester very much. i got to look at daphnia thru a microscope#today which is super fun :-) microbiology is so cool#one day ill plan my posts better since its midnight but i have a feeling yall are gonna eat this up#WHICH SPEAKING OF you guys have been so kind to me :'-) i read all of the nice things yall leave in the notes and it makes me so happy#i always get so nervous before i post and idk why#tomorrow i will put this up on my redbubble if i remember . i would do it now but it takes a while and i gotta get up#at six to study for a quiz at 8 </3 crying sobbing#anyway if the erins want to sponsor me my email is m- * sound of metal chair wham *#thats a joke unless they want to ANJHKFDGB
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theyaresosofttheyaresosofttheyaresosofttheyaresosofttheyaresosofttheyaresosofttheyaresosofttheyaresosofttheyaresosofttheyaresosofttheyaresosofttheyaresosofttheyaresosofttheyaresosofttheyaresosoftmmmmmhhhhh!!!!
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yeah some mistakes, yeah i can't do proper backs yet, I don't fcking care honestly, i love it <3
#pulls a glock out and presses it agains each and every one of my brain cells#WHO WAS IT??#WHICH ONE OF YOU??#TELL ME SO I CAN CHAIN YOU ON A CHAIR SO U CAN NEVER LEAVE#better post this now before I feel anxious about it#they. are. so. fcking. soft.#I mean I fck up the coloration again#but thats nothing new lol#to be perfectly honest I was in awe and could think of much after doing those outlines#so I just pastell...all of it#THEY ARE SO SOFT!!#and here i thought i would suck at drawing kisses lol#*puts it on a frigde with a magnet*#look what I did :3#kn8#kaiju no 8#kafhoshi#kafka x hoshina#fanart#here I am thinking I felt yuri today lol#well im gonna get to that i promise#soshiro hoshina#kafka hibino#kn8 fanart#icy's art
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this one's for all the yuri enjoyers out there — nsft under cut
meronia event prompt(s): scar
#death note#mello#near#meronia#meroniaevent#fem mello#fem near#i had fun w this one!! i love drawing yuri even though i dont do it nearly as much as i want lol#also i love drawing bush thumbs up emoji#i let the lines be messier bc my hands have been a little sore and i am not in the mood for linework#and in honor of yuri day i should get to do whatever i want forever peace and love on planet yuri#anyway i didnt know what to do w near's hair but decided to keep it short bc i didnt want to cover her back for composition reasons#sorry for posting so late i woke up at like 10am which is late for me as of late and had school shit to do boooo#also im in the mood to talk so i made a pot pie today (no meat im vegetarian) and i followed no recipes and used my heart to make#it and i did so well it fucks so hard my heart always leads me to greatness and recipes do nothing for me bc im a culinary genius#<-blatantly untrue but we stay silly#oh!!! and also i got a thing in the mail the thing being a weevil plushie i ordered a bit back that i bought on a whim that i should not#have bought bc im saving my money but actually he makes my life a million bajillion times better and i love him dearly#anyway meronia event is making my life so much better i feel 100% better than i did 2 days ago and hopefully the joy this brings#me will stay w me for long enough to get through the rest of my summer classes bc they are killing me lol. my current ones are ending#in like a week or smth but i have 2 more in july *sobs* all this just to graduate a semester early#k anyway enjoy the yuri ...or dont. im not the boss of u. ig
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WIFI IS MINE ONCE AGAIN as i sit on a mattress on the floor
#it feels like ive been without it for so long...#it has been... three and a half days... i am Weak....#nah jk i wouldve been find without it for much longer#but boy howdy am i Glad to be able to use my dear beloved laptop again#i am In The New Place i am Beginning To Settle#tomorrow i begin unpacking my own stuff!!! exciting!!!#i cant wait to admire all of my Things!#ohhhh and i finally have a spot on the wall for my combo whiteboard/corkboard....#im still very stressed and i want to lay in a hole but!!#i am doing slightly better than a few days ago!#the weather has been nice... cool and rainy... i am not used to cool and rainy#its also cold and i am - unfortunately - a desert creature#suffice to say i am wearing hand warmers a hoodie and a blanket#absolutely unprompted#the place's last owner Didnt Fucking Clean though#so there have been many spiders. and cobwebs. and general Grime we will have to scrub#like seriously today i was dusting the ceiling. THE CEILING.#had to dust & vacuum the windowsills... gonna scrub my bathroom tomorrow...#theres a large tear in my bedroom carpet too...#ugh and the cabinets are Small so organizing all the spices and shit has been Rancid#stuff has to go out of place and you cant see it all and MY ORGANIZATIONAL SYSTEMS ARE CRUMBLING#sometimes it feels like my adhd and autism are fistfighting but during a move?#lockstep babeyyyy. they are Streamlined. lots of things and lots of sorting & placing and eeheehee#i have also killed most of the freakishly huge mosquitos in the house so! things are better!#that first night was Rough! its better now! this shell is becoming a House!
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2.08 IT CHOOSES | 1.03 THE DOLLHOUSE
#yellowjackets#yellowjacketsedit#mistynat#mistynatedit#otp: you should be thanking me#otp#parallel*#i love parallels#inverseparallel*#mine#edit#*#tag meta#meta#wordles#HI HELLO I AM HAVING FEEEEEEELINGS ABOUT THIS TODAY#~#feeling particularly crazy about 1) the fact that misty stays more hands-off in the dollhouse; it's like she's learned more about how#she needs to handle nat - that forcing her is necessary to an extent but that it made a seed of resentment when they were kids#so misty knows better now to give nat a little bit of space and guide her instead of tackle her#(i am once again Thinking about misty treating nat like a bird!!!)#so instead of holding nat back in gif two - where misty runs toward her in 97 - misty lets her go and just watches after her#and 2) NAT PUSHING MISTY AWAY HURTS SO MUCH MORE NOW#because she didn't in 97 - when they were kids nat let misty hold her back let misty justify why she needed to let javi go and then focused#her anger about that inward at herself. but in the dollhouse nat pushes misty away!! she's turning inward again but she's letting her anger#out a little at misty! and misty takes it!! misty is her knight and it is her job to protect her queen and she tried to do that#until the very end
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in honor me turning twenty three, i give you: some old original notes about twenty three year old adrien from thirteen<3
#me turning 23: (thinking about my fanfiction) this is so meta#ml#anna rambles#thirteen#smh i haven’t even had an old abandoned nightmare house to haunt today…#23 year old adrien from thirteen i am so you today. you are me. except i’m having a much better birthday than you#taylor swift announced a new album for me. you’re having to clean mold and think abt ur childhood💔#thinking also about 23 year old emilie agreste for related reasons. don’t worry about it#anyway feeling and acting normal. as always.#the day that anna scribbles turned twenty three was a monday in february chilly and bright. she didn’t do her homework.#<3
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Catching up on all of your art and, holy shit, you are genuinely beocming one of my inspirations for my own art. Like, up there with professionals in the industry.
Keep up the good work, Spectre! You're going places!
The fact that I see this when I'm at an all-time low of feeling talentless with my art;;;; tysm omg ueeuueueueueueueueuweue,,,,,,,,
#thank you so much for the ask;;;#I.... I feel so honored#I actually felt really low today like it feels like I'm just churning out shit-tier art#and to be compared to professionals;;; when that's my literal life goal.....#it just rocks me heart and feels#I worked so hard to get where I am today#constantly trying to evolve my drawing style since day one and become better than I was yesterday#so that I could be a professional indie artist someday#thank you. thank you so much#I feel a bit more reassured about my art now#ziku's insane rambles
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gonna go get the new covid booster tomorrow ya girls gonna feel like SHIT
#stupid rant is stupid#yeehaw#i mean like hopefully i wont feel like shit for too long#we'll see lmfao ugh#better do my chores and cleaning today and tomorrow before i crash#also for my new people#i am a case where my body had decided to make me feel like covid when i get the shots#like the second shot of the first wave of vaccines put me down 5 days lol#that time has since reduced but its been a year since my last booster#so#mmmm#trepidation lol#but i would much rather feel like shit for a few days than make my current problems worse with getting sick or long covid
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i haven't been this not okay in over a year and i do not miss it and i do not want it
#good to know i can still spiral this hard and catastrophize as well as i ever did DESPITE EVERY TECHNIQUE I KNOW.#and yoga. and breathing. and cold water and ice. and logic. and distractions. and thought reframing.#teeth aren't a moral judgement EXCEPT THEY FEEL LIKE THEY ARE#I feel like I'm going to ACTUALLY DIE. ACTUALLY DIE#I was JUST the other day so grateful it's been so long since I was mostly dissociated instead of mostly present and now all I want is to be#checked the FUCK out and also not exist so I don't have to go tomorrow#pull yourself together @ me you have objectively already survived much worse#and you have it much better than it could be#and worst case scenarios are still dealable-with even though they don't feel like it#unhelpfully. all my brain wants to do is tell every person i know that i'm freaked out and terrified and full of shame and guilt and dread#and want COMFORT AND ATTENTION#and it's like bitch you wouldn't even accept it if you asked and they DID give it to you. you are so fucked up right now. chill. OUT.#@ all of you I am SO sorry i'm liveblogging my breakdown today. i'm scared to open my journal and spiral more so this is all I've got#I'll be done with this mode by the end of tomorrow I promise#shh katie
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Behold! An enormous snugglebeast.
It has cookie flavoured lipbalm on its head now.
#Today I gave Big Baby Rosie and my Tiny Baby Belle a ham bone each and they have been having the time of their lives#I think baby belle dribbled all over herself tho so she is gonna need a bath after that.#It allowed my sister to pack up her car and leave though. So it worked as a good distraction. The house seems so quiet now#The holiday season is very much over now. I have so much cleaning to do holy shit#I am very in pain but I do feel incredibly loved. My fluffy babies look after me so well#dogs are better than people#fluffy baby
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A lot of people are going to be VERY frustrated with Lando and Oscar for different reasons but the boys drove a great race. I have many thoughts (Mostly about the Mclaren boys):
Lando had a great start and Oscar had a BEAUTIFUL overtake. I can’t blame Oscar for trying to win and I can’t blame Lando for being disappointed with p3.
Unfortunate that they both had to go with a 2 stop and that gave Charles the opportunity to grab that win. There are many more races to come and I’m sure many victories.
I LOVE that Mclaren let them race but today should’ve looked a lot different and Mclaren managed to throw away a 1-2 yet again due to strategy and not being able to make difficult decisions. I know Andrea Stella doesn’t want a number 1 driver and in 90% of cases I agree. But in the context of the WDC there should have been a priority to maximize a points finish for Lando AT LEAST for today especially with how far down rb were. Oscar absolutely drove brilliantly but there is a 0% chance of him winning the WDC this year- there is a (while unlikely) chance Lando could win this year and I can’t help but be disappointed that Mclaren have basically thrown that away today just because they want to seem “fair”. I can’t help but feel there may be some double standards in place at Mclaren.
#monza gp 2024#f1#formula 1#lando norris#oscar piastri#this is coming from someone whose favorite driver is Oscar#idk I have many thoughts#it’s just starting to seem that team orders only get called when Oscar is behind#while I do think Oscar overall drove better today I can’t help but feel a bit weird about it all#All this to say I am a Lando and Oscar fan… NOT a Mclaren fan :)#I just can’t help but think Mclaren are going to ruin Lando and Oscar’s teammate relationship trying to make it equal#I KNOW they will be okay but I CANNOT take much more of it#Lando having to fight for fastest lap on the last lap 2 races in a row shows that he is on his own in the fight for the WDC
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Got a very lovely surprise yesterday when I received a delivery of flowers from one of the autism organizations whose Board I am on, with well wishes for my recovery from surgery! I don't think any organization I've been associated with has done something like this for me, and I'm genuinely touched by such a kind, unexpected gesture...
#personal post#this was such a nice surprise#albeit entirely unnecessary#but i am so grateful that my colleagues thought enough of me to do this#also today is day five post-op and i am feeling so much better#one day at a time#people can be awful sometimes#but then people can be wonderful too#and i'm just so grateful#thank you all you lovely people for being here#<3
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