#he had to hear it
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
arrowmaker15 · 10 months ago
Text
(Steph, Jason, and Tim sitting on the couch in Wayne Manor)
Steph: So, why did you and Rose break up?
Tim, curious:
Jason: Well, we broke up for the reason every other couple breaks up. We weren't having the amount of sex required to ignore the bad things about each other.
Tim: ....what...?
Jason, not stopping: It's just like this one phrase; "Love is blind. Lust is Hellen Keller."
Tim, spitting coffee out: JeEZus!
Steph: We don't have that problem, do we?
Jason: Oh, hell no. Three times a day is perfect.
Tim, partially choking: STOP TALKING-
95 notes · View notes
fanaticalthings · 7 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
next thing you're gonna tell me is that the butts match 🙄
<- Prev Masterlist Next ->
10K notes · View notes
puppyeared · 1 month ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Bridge to turnabout doodles
7K notes · View notes
bet-on-me-13 · 5 months ago
Text
The weirdly competent Doctor
So! The Watchtower's Medical Bay is a hub of constant Activity. With the number of Heroes who work under the Justice League, there are always injuries, health check-Ups, and illnesses that need healing.
But with the amount of Variant Biologies that those Heroes have, it's always a guessing game as to how to help them best. Some Metahumans react positively to penicillin, but others react like it's their Kryptonite. Some Aliens have anatomy similar to Humans, others are so different you can't tell the Stomach from the Bladder.
So when they hired a New Doctor for the Medical Bay, they had to run him through an entire Course on Variant Biologies and how best to treat specific Heroes. It was long and difficult to remember fully, but it was necessary for him to know.
But then the new Doctor started correcting Them.
"Actually, Martian's react better to the Syrup of Eucalyptus Plants better than Penicillin, since Eucalyptus is very similar to a medicinal plant from Mars which they used in many of their antibiotics."
"I don't think just pumping double doses of sedative is the best way to calm down a Speedster, that could have adverse effects on their body. Perhaps try Psychic Intervention? Their minds move a Mile a Second, but if you can calm them down their bodies will follow suit."
"Of course you use Micro-Doses of Kryptonite to operate on Superman! What else would you do?! I don't know, maybe ask JLD to enchant your Equipment to make use of Kryptonian suseptiblity to Magic? The Kryptonite is just gonna give him Cancer!"
Of course the Doctors didn't take kindly to being rudely corrected by a newbie, and Fired him on his first day.
Then a few days later their usual Treatments don't work, and they decide to give those strategies the Quack Doctor gave them out of desperation.
And Lo and Behold, they work! Martian Manhunter is fully healed and feels much better than the previous times he has needed surgery. Apparently they used a different Antibiotic that worked better with his Biology. Which was incredible, how had they figured it out?
Another Doctor you say? One who was experienced on Martian Biology and Medicinal History? He would very much like to meet with the man!
...
What do you mean you fired him for talking back?!
7K notes · View notes
camofag · 7 months ago
Text
the public reaction to i saw the tv glow is like a perfect case study into how cis people take up queer spaces and unknowingly mock and enjoy trans suffering. sitting in the theater, i had a pit in my stomach the entire time. so many times, i would tear up and then someone else in the theater would laugh. and i wouldn’t cry because how would they look at me when the lights came back on? because they don’t see it. they don’t see the pain. they think it’s funny. i left the theater completely silent, not saying a word to my boyfriend and he didn’t say a word to me until partway into the drive home. the people around us immediately got to picking it apart, explaining what it all meant to each other, dumbing it down, making theories. cis people see the the movie, just like transness, as something to debate. a conversation. something to dissect because it makes them uncomfortable if they don’t understand it in their easily digestible way.
6K notes · View notes
jjkyaoi · 6 months ago
Text
the headcanon of regulus just being able to cry on command is horrifying but also the funniest thing i’ve ever fucking heard. like i imagine regulus is hanging out with the marauders, post black brothers reconciliation, and him and sirius are bickering and sirius JOKINGLY goes “well it’s not MY fault it’s impossible for you to show any emotion” and regulus blinks. and then just fully starts sobbing.
and james and remus and peter are all like ?!?!?! what the FUCK . RIGHTFULLY SO. and james’ heart is hurting so bad because he’s never seen regulus cry before and he’s trying to comfort him and hold him and regulus, (who is gay and a little shit) is just letting himself be hugged and letting james pet his hair or whatever and remus is like. sirius what the fuck apologize to your brother??????? because sirius has been sitting there the entire time unmoving and he just raises his eyebrows, completely unimpressed and deadpan when he goes, “you guys do know he’s faking right”. and then when remus and james both are like HUH??? torn between bewildered and angry with this reaction, regulus just extracts himself from james, face completely neutral but with tears drying on his cheeks, no sign of the heaving, hyperventilating sobs he’d fallen into literally a second ago and says “i win”. it terrifies peter so bad that he can’t look him in the eyes for a week
6K notes · View notes
amvipod · 5 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
charlie’s uncle knew a guy who installed pacemakers in his garage for a hundred bucks and the rest is history
3K notes · View notes
chloesimaginationthings · 7 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
Gregory making sure Michael is a true FNAF fan
7K notes · View notes
aru-art · 10 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
sourdough rolls with homemade lemon curd what the absolute fuck man
7K notes · View notes
iguessthisisanewobsession · 8 months ago
Text
The ring was small and silver with a single emerald embedded in the metal.
It wasn’t something flashy, it probably cost less than the smallest gem from his vault all together.
But it was perfect.
Which made it so heartbreaking to turn it down.
“Dick.. you know me so well.. I wish I could take this ring, i really do.”
Dick was still on one knee in the little apartment, but he put the small box down on the floor as he asked.
“Then what’s stopping you?”
Danny let out a bitter chuckle,
“The US government.”
3K notes · View notes
beebfreeb · 3 months ago
Text
Wait I just found drawings of Resetti I did like, last year, and never posted because I got horribly sick for 2 weeks.
Tumblr media
3K notes · View notes
technically-human · 6 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
Edwin after the confession is a menace
Bonus Charles being normal about it:
Tumblr media
3K notes · View notes
ganondoodle · 6 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
jerren on his way to beat miquellas ass once he learns what he did to radahn
(Elden Ring)
2K notes · View notes
monochromeia · 4 months ago
Text
Reading The Way of Kings is really funny so far because you go from reading about Kaladin and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day(s) to Shallan and her sailor buddy Yalb's wacky book-buying adventure back to Kaladin about to fucking kill himself.
1K notes · View notes
kittykalliarts · 1 year ago
Text
Tumblr media
For decades, the blank vision that Iudex Neuvillette wears near his heart has been subject to much discussion in Fontaine. Nobody remembers who it had once belonged to or why the ancient dragon protected it so jealously. It is said that if the Chief Justice would to stare at it for a long while, it would be sure to rain right after. Oh, how beloved that person must've been.
4K notes · View notes
choccy-milky · 7 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
seb about to learn every language there is 📚📚
3K notes · View notes