#hal clark

[sully-s]

Listen, if I had the time I would just make Justice Leauge the mockumentary, lol.

[bruciemilf]

Anyway, thinking about how Bruce’s mom tendencies bleed over around the League.

He pulls out a Barbie pink scrunchie from his endless utility belt.

Oliver is very sure he’s seen it in Spoiler’s blonde mane before. He wordlessly secures Diana’s hair in a ponytail before she jumps into battle.

Barry skins his knee while running, which, considering, is pretty severe. Definitely not the kind of wound you can treat with Gray Ghost bandages.

“I’m NEVER taking this off.”

“Okay, gross?”

“Shut up, Hal, you don’t even wash your suit, you just make a new one every time!”

“I’m allergic to laundry detergent, everybody knows that, BARRY.”

Bruce does not tolerate their fighting for more than 15 minutes at a time. “I will count to 3.”

Hal is quite literally flabbergasted when, after a particularly rough mission, Batman walks over to him and gently places a plate of fruits before him.

“Hal,” in that rain soft voice. “Fruit.”

“…Thanks?”

He just walks off. Like it’s nothing.

“…Did he just do something nice for me? Everybody saw that, right? You’re all witnesses. “

Everyone’s equal parts shocked and equal parts losing their shit. Clark’s eyes are just slightly red.

“I need to take a nap.”

[pinkiemachine]

Hehehe…

[frownyalfred]

favorite Bruce Wayne hc of the week: you’re allowed to follow him into the Cave to continue your argument, but he’s going to start undressing and pulling off armor while heading for the showers and if you get an eyeful, that’s on you.

It’s an effective tactic and stops a good 60% of those arguments in their tracks. The remaining 40% are usually intense enough to follow Bruce into the showers and yell at him while he’s casually showering off grime and blood.

[daydreamerwonderkid]

RIP to Bruce. Can't get a single night to himself smh

[jesterraconteuse]

Hal Jordan finding out about Nightwing: YOU. You have a *kid*?

Batman: well... Technically he's my oldest and age of majority... But he's still my kid.

Hal Jordan: OLDEST? YOU HAVE MORE? 2? 3?

Batman visibly annoyed:... 6... Legally.

Hal Jordan: I'm going home. This has single handedly killed my willpower for a week, I need to process this.

Later....

Superman: Ah so you finally found out. I'm proud of him honestly, good to see he's willing to bond with others again.

Hal Jordan: You knew?

Superman: ...His kids basically call me Uncle Supes. I've babysat. I was around when he still just had Nightwing

WW: They're so cute! Children of such strength and bravery. Not to mention his dog, his cat, his cow... His son has animals even I've never seen before!

Hal Jordan: I've had enough.

And Hal hasn't even learned about his crime fighting cousin, batwing, Oracle, bluebird, Spoiler, and of course Jarro.

Note: everyone knows Supes is a father, he's the dad to talk your ear off about it but he's too nice with too much country charm for anyone to say anything about it. WW and Martian Manhunter are the only ones who listen absolutely intently.

[arkangelo-7]

Okay, but, Bruce gentle parenting the fuck out of the Justice League is literally such a funny concept. Like, the only reason it works so well is because of the overwhelming amount JL Daddy Issues; they’re all secretly desperate for some parental affection and Bruce is so naturally a Dad that he can’t help himself.

That gold star thing he used to do with Dick? Where he gave him a little star every time he kept himself safe during a patrol? Same thing works perfectly for Clark. He’s literally indestructible (but Bruce worries) so whenever he comes out unscathed from a battle (which is most of the time) he’ll hand Clark a little golden star sticker. Clark collects those things like they’re priceless artifacts and sticks them on his laptop.

The anger management therapy he did with Jason? Where he’d run through katas (a series of choreographed martial arts movements) whilst doing breathing exercises? Works like a charm on Diana and Dinah. They’re both super powered, so anything Bruce puts in front of her they’ll destroy, so going through a good old fashioned kata before a big mission will help them both focus without risking the destruction of the Watchtower.

The mindful meditation he did with Tim? When they’d sit in silence until Tim’s brain finally trained itself to know rest? It’s the perfect thing for Barry. He’s a speedster so his brain moves at about the same pace as Bruce and Tim’s (though maybe not quite as analytically); the post-mission meditation sessions are the perfect thing to help him calm down.

The art therapy he did with Damian? Where they’d paint memories that brought them pain/loneliness/loss/sadness because talking about it was too hard? Surprisingly, both John and Hal are into it. (Must be a Lantern thing.) Neither of them are great artists, but John paints about his time in the army and Hal about his time in the Air Force. They’ve both lost friends and comrades, have seen the worst of humanity up close, and just can’t always verbalize that feelingly of powerlessness even though their the galaxy’s greatest warriors—but they can paint it.

The silent chess games he’d play with Cassandra? Where’d they’d sit there and pick each others brains without having to say a word, could communicate an immense amount of emotion with the slide of a pawn? Great for Jon. He can’t talk into Bruce’s mind (not without considerable effort) and he can’t really talk to Bruce about everything that happened to him on Mars, but they can sit and play chess until they both have a mutual understanding of one another’s trauma.

All the crocheting he’s done with Steph? Where they’d sit in front of a fireplace in Wayne Manor and discuss their similarly complex relationships with their parents? Loved to do this with Arthur, of all people. They have to get waterproof Atlantean yarn, but the efforts worth the creations they make during Monitor duty, and it’s one of those rare time when Arthur can really vent about all of his troubles leading a life above and below sea, being a king, his love life—anything. Bruce will always listen.

And then, all of the soccer that he’s played with Duke? Where they’d let loose and just be competitive? Cyborg similarly appreciates this, but prefers football, naturally. Now, Bruce is too old to tackle a Mother-Box-Enhanced human, but that doesn’t stop him from covertly setting up pick-up football games on the front lawn of the Hall of Justice every other week.

So yeah. Bruce and his gentle parenting.

[nightingale-prompts]

Danny lives in a horror movie-DC x DP prompt

Based on my favorite book series "tales from the gas station"

It's not every day that a mission requires the league to travel to middle America in a bid to obtain a highly cursed artifact but it certainly is today.

Locating the Seal of Silent Ashes was a task usually given to Justice League Dark but Constantine was currently busy. So that meant it was left to the poster boys to get this done. They dressed in civilian attire to investigate the last location of the seal starting with the first building on the edge of town. A small dusty gas station near the woods.

The inside had an awful smell, like death and cleaning fluid. The lights gave off a greenish-blue tint. Rats could be seen out of the corner of your eyes. Most of the chips were offbrand and crappy.

Behind the counter was the teenage boy chewing gum. He looked up at the group before going back to reading his book. He had clearly seen better days but didn't show signs of caring about the state of his hair or bags under his eyes. He drank his coffee.

The air felt off.

"Hey kiddo, do you mind giving us directions?" Clark started.

The kid narrowed his eyes as he popped his gum.

"You're not from here. That or you're from that cult in the woods. Listen I'm not joining. Seriously, cosmic nihilism and fatalism sounds doomed. Hey wait-" the teen checked his notes " No, the cult killed themselves in that mass suicide 2 weeks ago. I forgot, sorry."

The teen didn't say anything else as he went back to his book.

The horrified look of the adults shared was almost hilarious. At least to the teen if he looked up.

"Oh, and stay out of the woods. I don't want the police to come back and ask about who saw you last. Seriously if whatever is in there tears you apart I won't feel bad. I put those signs out forever ago and if I get one more girl covered in blood running in here screaming about her dead friends I'll get a headache." The teen shrugged turning the page.

"What do you mean?! Why would-?! Who's killing people?!" Barry asked frantically as Bruce serched for more reports of missing people in the area.

"I don't know. Why would I know? If you want to go in the cursed forest go ahead. I mean that's how they all die. It isn't my job to stop you. My job is to sit here and watch this store." The teen huffed in annoyance.

Before anymore questions were asked the signal of the radio was disrupted and a demonic howl screeched through the radio.

"God damnit. That cunt is back. Stay here." The teen growled as he grabbed his bat from under the counter and walked out the back door. "String bean! Get off the fucking roof you bastard! You know that radio is all I have here!"

A chattering laugh like a death rattle was heard and the sound of 2 sets of feet was heard on the roof then they lept down.

"Come here so I can beat you to death!" The teen ran around the building towards the front of the gas station chasing-what the fuck is that!

It was like a human that was twisted to crabwalk on all fours backwards. Its face was contorted into a black stretched-out smile with no teeth. It had no eyes just black sockets. All its limbs were stretched out to an extra meter in length. It was a skinwalker of some kind with chalk-white skin. It was skittering away from the teen who was swinging his bat at its head.

"Stop running! I told you before what would happen if I found you fucking with me again!" The boy meant it as he finally landed a hit and began wacking it over and over it.

The skin walker screeched and tried to run for its life but couldn't.

After reducing the monster into a black puddle the black-stained teen came back inside to sit back down not paying anymore to the monster blood he was covered in.

"Sorry about that. Most of the freaks around here have learned to stay away from this place. That one is new and he doesn't listen. You'd think they'd learn but Sting Bean thinks he can torment me. Petty bastard." The teen sighed "anyways are going to buy anything or are you going to waste what oxygen we get in here with this shitty ventilation.

Diana couldn't help but admire the boldness of the boy. He had no hesitation or fear against the beasts of this area even if was crude.

"Does Constantine have a cousin or something? Just a more angry one" Barry whispered to Hal.

[violent138]

More than half the League is betting at any time that they know when it's actually Batman under the mask, or someone else. Unfortunately, they were wrong when:

Dick was doing a phenomenal job of playing Bruce (didn't give himself away even once by smiling), because he fell asleep

Batman stubbed his toe against a table and swore like a sailor which led to cash exchanging hands as several people figured it was Jason, but Bruce had recently switched out of Matches Malone to dress up as Bats and hadn't shaken the Mindset yet

Batman's suit sat weirdly empty at the table and Oliver, annoyed, tried to tell Damian that this was too serious a meeting for Bruce to delegate, but it was Batman, hit with a de-ageing spell and too stubborn to sit out

After sustaining pretty serious injuries, Batman was whiteknuckling the table, in an awful mood, and nobody thought anything of it. Barry offered to help Bruce up (if the pain was keeping him trapped, trying not to insult Batman too much), and Jason tightly replied that if he moved the suit was going to tear.

Clark and Bruce had a bet for how long they could replace Bruce with a mannequin without anyone noticing, and because Clark kept looking over at "Bruce" and giggling (pretty par for the course for them), nobody noticed for five hours.

[florisa6s]

a idea- mainly Bruce

I like the idea of Bruce being really weird and random at the most surprising times just to mess with people and Damian, Dick and every other kid sadly got that trait too.

----

Damian: as a child of divorce-

Talia: me and my beloved is not divorced.

-----

Clark: Bruce why didn't you say anything about them?!

Bruce: What they look at me first it's not my fault I'm a snack

Clark: Bruce you have kids.

Bruce: A Dilf snack

Clark: No!

Bruce: Listen as the hottest one here-

Hal: What you not that hot-

Bruce: AS THE MOST SCRUMPTIOUS SNACK HERE!

----

I swear all his kids got this trait from him, they watched and learned from the best so they all do it too

----

Jason: one time I got stuck in a hole for months

Roy: A hole why'd you get stuck-

Jason: I kinda like....died so yeah kinda got stuck in a hole for months I'm lucky they didn't cremate me.

------

Dick: if Damian ever had a date I'd kill them

Wally: Dick you can't just kill someone because-

Dick: if anyone lays a hand on my baby brother they are dead.

Wally: I thought bats don't-

Dick: I'm not a bat I'm a big brother first.

------

Tim: why did my camera break? It lasted two years falling off fire escapes and getting shot at but it died when I knocked it off my desk...why did it have to leave me in this cold cold world...

Steph: are you sure he was only supposed to take 2 pills?

Cass: *shrugs*

-----

[mild-and-hammered]

So, I know the fandom (myself very included) love to talk about JLA playing fuck marry kill with Brucie Wayne as an option...but I offer an alternative. Bruce overhears a conversation between Clark, Diana, and Hal.

Clark: No I mean if we're playing, I'd fuck you Diana, obviously it would be a wonderful night--

Diana: and all the way into the morning, obviously

Clark: Obviously. And I'd marry Batman, so sorry Hal, I guess you gotta go.

Hal, outraged: Marry Bats???? Over Me???

Clark: Yeah, hello, have you seen him? No offense and all, but if you get the chance to sleep with wonder woman you kinda have to. And if I marry Batman I get sweet gadgets, nerdy banter, awful coffee, and I get to use the little ears on the cowl as handles while I bend him over the breakfast table every morning.

(plot twist, Clark totally knows Batman's there and this is his extremely weird and roundabout way of flirting)

[abisalli]

bring your kid to work day 

★bonus:  he’s impressed 

[kenandeliza]

Older brother

How the heck indeed plastic man

inspired by @im-not-buying-it-ether ‘s post

[pinkiemachine]

Concept: an episode of the Justice League cartoon where the MCs get sucked into a 90s teen movie… powers get reset to when they were that age.

[frownyalfred]

The command structure / ranking of the Justice League is actually super hard to understand from the outside, if you think about it. How many times have alien diplomatic missions arrived to meet with them, only to struggle to pick out who they should direct their communications toward? Sure, you’ve got the Kryptonian, he’s big and flashy and recognizable across sectors. But there’s an Amazonian princess standing next to him who looks dangerous and speaks like a royal. You’ve got an Atlantean king behind her, also royal, also dangerous. You’ve got a Green Lantern of the Sector with trace ion signatures from all the recent battles in nearby galaxies, and then — then — you have a man in black, shadowy armor who doesn’t introduce himself, who doesn’t speak or negotiate unless the others falter, yet ever single one of them looks to him as the conversation proceeds — checking, assuring, looking for guidance etc. is he the leader, then?

[clericxhood777]

just imagine how stressed the jl would be after finding out that bruce has a biological son. he's batman, so of course, he's not going to get laid, right? then he introduces the new robin that acts and looks a lot like him and the jl malfunctions

Diana: So, he's not adopted?

Bruce: No, he's my son

Clark: How did you? How can you? How did this happen?

Hal: What Clark's trying to ask is, how did you get laid?

Clark: Especially with you brooding all the time

Bruce: It just happened

Diana: *Picks up Damian* He's quite cute

Damian, about to stab Diana: I am not cute

Diana, who is used to kids with a sword due to being raised on Themyscira: Oh and he's a warrior by heart