#fuck john house

[anythingbyadriannelenker]

house md is so crazy because it’s all i can think about but the thoughts oscillate between oh my god wilson’s ransom note for house’s guitar lmao to remember the episode where a rape victim was able to recognize house as a victim of abuse and was struggling to move on until he talked about his father. and the camera pans away as she starts to talk about her experience so the audience doesn’t hear her story and it stays between her and house

[blistering-typhoons]

THAT'S HOLMES RIGHT??? IN HIS BOOKSELLER DISGUISE ON THE LEFT???? THAT'S THEM WALKING IN TOGETHER SIDE BY SIDE RIGHT?!!?!? JESUS CHRIST?????

[moonyswarmsweaters]

Walburga: You are not good enough for my son.

Remus: You’re not good enough for your son.

Walburga: Excuse me?

Remus: You heard me.

[future-crab]

A funny thing I've noticed about responses to the Locked Tomb is that most people I talk to agree that the memes and references are kind of hit or miss for them, but no one can agree on which are the hits and which are the misses.

I've seen someone whose taste and opinions I really respect say, "Look, not all of the memes in these books work for me and I think overall there are too many of them, but None House, Left Grief is fucking gold," and someone else whose taste and opinions I really respect say, "Look, I don't hate all the memes in these books, but None House, Left Grief is just unforgivable I hate it."

[hilsonamore]

hahaha yes yes 2004 medical malpractice show suuuuure, show me the cutest little episode full of hilson pranking each other and house fucking MELTING at the sight of wilson trying to trick him, suuuuure show me how much his eyes light up whenever his boy-bestie is near and suuuuuuure end the episode by showing house looking at his sword with his father’s name engraved on it and being on the verge of tears suuuuure David Shore thank you for destroying me suuuuuure ahaha

[panmostuck]

commissioned my awesome oomfie habibi purgatorism for these dirkjohn creatures! go check it out on twitter and on instagram!

[incorrect-hs-quotes]

DAVE: we need a new fucked up drink pilk wasnt enough

DAVE: suggestions?

JOHN: tequilk.

DAVE: ok competition closed what the fuck

[fortjester]

i just think it's so interesting that the Eighth House is the soul siphoner house, when Mercy is (to put it incredibly simply) an anatomist. as far as i'm aware, she has little to no interest in souls past the baseline interest she needs to have. but you know who was very interested in souls? Cristabel.

devote your life to god; then go ahead and end it to help a man who might as well be god understand soul magic. devote your second life to your best friend; devote your body to her; devote your second death to keeping her soul alive for infinity. have the House you built with her take your sacrifice and devotion, and make of it an abomination. talk about tragic irony.

[inkbybambi]

imagine going to a haunted house with your friend, she gets so freaked out she runs ahead and you trip and fall and can’t catch up to her.

ghost sees you, stalking toward you with a knife and you suddenly can’t breath, tears streaming down your cheeks as you choke on a sob and beg for him to stop.

you’re hyperventilating, trying to crawl away but backed into the corner of the hallway, and you’re absolutely shaking from fear. it’s hard to catch your breath, feeling like your chest is collapsing in on itself, fat tears still falling and dripping from your jaw.

ghost puts the knife away, holds out his hands in a placating manner but you’re still too scared, still begging him to stay away.

he uses a radio to call for someone, and you watch as a gentleman — no costume, no fake blood or weapons — comes to you. ghosts turns the other way to keep others away as the man crouches in front of you, blue eyes deep with worry, a frown pulling on his lips.

“you’re alright, sweetheart,” he says in this raspy drawl. “can you walk for me?”

all you can do is whimper and shake your head, unable to stop glancing over his shoulder, wondering if ghost is going to come back, if someone else — someone worse — will appear in his stead.

“i gotcha,” he says, carefully scooping you up in his arms, making sure to not jostle your ankle too much as he takes you through a door, the atmosphere not as suffocating.

he gently places you on a chair, still worried, checking you over for anything he might’ve missed. he looks so soft, his distinct facial hair trimmed and kept, eyes gentle.

“‘’m john,” he says, and you find it within yourself to give him your name back.

he politely ignores the crack in your voice.

“you okay?” he asks as he places a hand on your knee, rubbing his thumb gently over and over.

“m-my friend,” you begin, voice thick and tears pooling at the corners of your eyes, catching on another hiccup. “she really wanted to go to this but none of our other friends wanted to and she looked so sad and i hate scary stuff, but i went with her anyway and then i tripped and she ran off and never came back for me,” you babble through increasingly thickening tears, reaching out for his shoulders and curling your fingers into his shirt, for comfort, to ground you.

he cups your cheek, thumb wiping away your tears, holding back his tongue on how your friend left you.

“let’s get you out of here, hm?”

[ikarakie]

sherlock holmes as a concept is so gay. ooohhhh look at me im some fucking guy solving murders with my bestest and only friend in the whole wide world! get a grip

[ks-lair]

An Empire's Catacomb

One for the Emperor, first of us all; One for his Lyctors, who answered the call; One for his Saints, who were chosen of old; One for his Hands, and the swords that they hold.

Two is for discipline, heedless of trial.

Three for the gleam of a jewel or a smile

Four for fidelity, facing ahead

Five for tradition and debts to the dead

Six for the truth over solace in lies

Seven for beauty that blossoms and dies

Eight for salvation no matter the cost

Nine for the Tomb, and for all that was lost

Nine is also for that really angry butch with a big sword

Just as intended by the Necrolord

Just some skulls I pixelled up since The Locked Tomb's brainrot is real and had to be externalized somehow.

It is pride month

[constablequodo]

No cause, it's the way Holmes and Watson were always destined to find each other in every universe, but there is not a single one where they are destined to end up together.

They are quite literally doomed by the narrative in every universe they find each other in, forced to have their future together ripped away from them by any means necessary. Whether that be death, marriage on either side, or simply the fact that it was inappropriate for the time period, the universe refuses to allow them to become any more than friends.

[blistering-typhoons]

fina/empt soviet holmes edit

song: everything reminds me of you by take care

[phantoms-world-and-more]

Danny running around DC

Danny decided to take a break from the teenage hero life and decides to visit the infinite realms, and stumbles upon DC

He sees that there are heros everywhere, rouge gallerys, magic, creepy billionaires, clones, butt kicking furries and more

So he decides to just go around and not give a fuck

He goes to metropolis and calls superman out for clone abuse and neglect IN THE MIDDLE OF A FIGHT, the villain decides to try and attack danny, but all danny dose is slap them in the face and scold them about manners and not interupting someone and when he's done he goes right back to criticising superman, danny stole his cape too

He showes up in one of Constantine and Zatanna jobs and just starts showing up at random, once he showed up in the house of mysterys and just starts touching cursed things and everyone is shocked when nothing happened

He showes up in star city and made it his mission to steal one of green arrows arrows in front of him, he just walked up grabed (whatever he carries his arrowes in, no idea what the name is) and runs away all while making eye contact, green arrow chased him for an hour before he lost him

Danny showes up in gothem and just starts doing cartwheels on the roofs and whenever a robin showes up he just has a normal conversation but the second batman himself showes up, he starts sassing him, left right and senter, and if batman comes within 5 feet of him danny will yell TAG slaps batman and take off running, still while doing cartwheels, flips and giving dick grayson a run for his money in acrobatics

The best part is danny dosent bother to transform into phantom so its fenton showing up at random

Everyone in the JL are loosing their mind with questions, superman and green arrow want their stuff back, and batman is fighting for adoption rights

[hilsonamore]

“WILSON! THIS IS STUPID!”

“You see, he really is getting better”

[dykedvonte]

Danse and Hancock work only after blind betrayal because it’s the equivalent of the one closeted person you kinda pity getting kicked out after being outted and you and your like 7 other faggot friends take them in and help them do a 180 on their outlook on life and personal style and get them to weed (possibly grape mentats in this case).