#fics: how not to drown

[embroideredhope]

Title: How Not To Drown

Fandom: The Sandman

Pairing: Dream of the Endless x Female OC

Chapters: 1/?

Summary:

Gods rise, they fall...and some of them rise again. Several thousand years after Fhenic, the God of Rebirth disappeared....a mortal dreams of her death.

Notes:

I have no idea what I am doing this is the first fanfic I have ever written. Heavily inspired by listening to CHVRCHS album Screen Violence on repeat. Tags & warnings will be updated as the story progresses.

Chapter 1:  I Don’t Want to Say I am Afraid to Die.

It was not often he went traveling through dreams, for it was not often there was a reason to.

Dreamers dreamed. That was just what they did when they came here. There were trillions of souls dreaming here at any one time. Not just humans, other sentient life spread across the universe. Even on the roof of this woman's apartment building, pigeons dreamed. Somewhere at the foot of her bed…a cat dreamed. 

Of all of the dreams…this one caught his attention. 

He watches silently from a shadow. 

A watcher of humanity and never quite taking part in it. 

It is a nightmare. One could wax lyrical about the difference between dreams and nightmares but they were made of the same stuff. The dreamer decided which it was. Perception was everything after all. 

In her nightmare, there is a man. Chasing her across an opulent and decadent bridge made of glistening white stone. Stone carvings of creatures across the top as she sprinted across the vast but shallow pond of the courtyard. Water perfectly still except for tall white flowers sticking up from its body. It shimmers in the moonlight, a full moon hanging high above them in a sky that is impossibly colourful with nebulae and stars. Constellations that her species had no name for, for this was not Earth - it was the heavens. 

“Fhein!” His voice rings out across the bridge, he is angry. 

The name sparks recognition…and his interest is captured. 

She runs faster. Ragged breaths, burning chest, a hand clutching the fabric of the long dress, hem of fine silk and lace almost edged like feathers, it floats behind her like a wake wave off the end of a boat, gracefully despite the clearly frantic emotions on her face, the tears and gasps for air as she leaves the bridge and enters the small circular pavilion. The platform of stone was the last structure before a vast and endless black ocean. 

The tranquil and still waters of the palace ponds gave way to the depths of the abyss. A watery void of nothingness that separated their realm from the mortal world beyond it. 

“No, no, no, no, no-” her distress is palatable, and yet there is a moment of peace as she realises something - there was nowhere to go but down. A slow turn, to look at the man running towards her, he was yelling her name again…and Fhein is unsure if it is because he is still angry, or if he is scared.

Her hand reaches out, materialising within its grasp is a dagger, its silver blade glints in the moonlight, red inlay in the shape of a swirl of flames along its blade reaching out from the red hilt. 

“Not again.” 

He can feel the sentiment echoing across the dream, like waves ripping out from a pond, for she had dreamed this a hundred times over, and then maybe another hundred more. 

“It’s a dream,” a shake of her head to herself, long dark hair follows her head movement, bright green eyes frantically searching around her, like she is looking for something, a way out? Anything?

It was surprisingly common for humans to be aware that they were dreaming. For all of his aloofness to humanity, their consciousness was interesting. How could it not be? He held them all in The Dreaming, along with almost every sentient thing in the universe - even Gods dreamed.. All of them visited here, the ones who dreamed in vivid detail with recall, the ones who dreamed in only concepts and feelings and didn’t remember. 

Except this was not a dream. 

It was a memory. 

Of a God who had lived a thousand thousand years ago and maybe some more. 

Dream remembered her name, if only because she had been unusually pleasant for a god. 

Over the many millennia that humanity had been walking the Earth many gods had risen and fallen. She had simply disappeared. Most of the time that meant one thing, death. He had never known what had happened to her, though he supposed…he was about to find out.

There is a small part of him that feels bad, that he had not noticed this dreamer before, dreaming over and over the last memory of a god that had lived long before her, but things just hadn’t lined up. He had not been looking, why would he, Fhenic may have died…but her entire pantheon had died one by one after her. For that was the way things were. 

They rose, they died, they fell. 

Only the Endless were…well endless. 

Then green eyes find the shadow in which he stands…and stops. She is staring right at him, like she can see him. 

She can see him. 

“You-” the word that leaves her is but a whisper, frightened and lost…jarred out of the dream of a memory before it resumes. In one swift movement Fhenic takes the knife, spins it in her hand and drives it into her own chest. Her body jolts with the force of the impact, and it happens so fast the King of Dreams can not avert his eyes. Many gods had died, not many of them had killed themselves. 

A step backwards is her final action, off the edge of the pavilion and into the waters below. Black hair fans out in front of her, layers of red dress caught up in the air as she falls in slow motion, as she hits the water…she wakes up. 

In the Waking World, consciousness returns to a young woman, she had not slept nearly enough, considering the morning was not early. A tired hand reached for the phone on the bedside table, only to let out a frustrated groan. Her alarm would sound in four minutes, she would rather there be hours of the night left, that way she could attempt to roll over and sleep and dream another dream, one that she would not remember. 

It was the same dream as always…well…kind of. For a moment her eyes narrow and stare at the ceiling, this time was different. This time there was someone else there. Something else. At the back of a shadow? 

“It’s too early for this shit…” maybe if she just closed her eyes she could focus on something other than the dream, though respite from her own thoughts come from a paw in her face and a soft meow. “Pumpkin, stop.” Another, more demanding meow as the ginger fluff ball decided it was wise to plant another paw on her face, “alright, good god I am up - I’m up! Fuck sake can’t get two moments peace in my life, come here then.” Hands drag out from under the covers, wrap the feline up in an embrace before it decides to dramatically collapse onto her chest.

“Maybe we could just lay here for a few more minutes…” for someone who disliked dreaming, she sure was desperate for more sleep, that was the thing about lack of sleep though - it wasn’t like you got more productive time in the day, you just got more time feeling crappy. 

A cry from the creature finally spurs action, “fine, fine-” she rises from slumber into the chilly air of the room. Feed the cat. Coffee. Work. In that order. 

Meanwhile, a realm away, the Dream King stands rooted to the spot where a nightmare had once played. He wanted to dive into the water after her, to stop the tides of mortality pulling her down. Yet it was not possible, he was millenia too late on that front. Instead, he takes two soft steps through The Dreaming back to his castle, left with only thoughts of how her death had been more tragic than she deserved…and how her marriage had been more than she could bear.  

The mortal world was not fair, neither was the realm of Gods. 

Sometimes people got what they deserved, sometimes they did not. 

That was simply the way. 

Yet, this time around, he did not like it 

[ohposhers]

OHPOSHERS, DRAW CLAYLEX AND MY LIFE IS YOURS !!!!!

give me your credit card number rn (sorry the canvas is really small i didnt realize i was so zoomed in when i was drawing euaggg)

[baeshijima]

— the weight of a sinner

to bear a sin is a result of consequence, but to bear a sin with no relation to you is an inescapable burden — a means to have a scapegoat and someone to hold accountable. unfortunately, you're one of the very few who seem to think as such.

CONTAINS : gn!reader, 3k wc, angst(y-ish), bittersweet, some lightheartedness in there... somewhere, shackling prison/pre-banishment dan heng, mentions of high-cloud quintet, relationship w/ dan feng left ambiguous (but implied dan feng x reader)

A/N : dan heng and reader face inner turmoil just as i do when facing any minor or major inconvenience. (the dan f/heng animated short was looped while i was writing this...)

Your time within the lifeless prison is limited. Lest you want to be caught red-handed by the stationed prison guards or, worse yet, Jing Yuan for trespassing, you ought to hurry. (You have an inkling he is well-aware of your routinely visits, but you choose to ignore the thought. It makes pretending to be none the wiser a little easier when you’re with him.)

Well, that much is easier said than done. 

Shooing away unnecessary thoughts, you continue your way down towards the depths of The Shackling Prison. Blending into the surrounding darkness, you wait as patrolling guards pass by, watching their receding figures with calm eyes. As always, the security towards the bottom of this dreary place is tighter. It’s understandable, really, when taking into consideration who they have held captive.

Eventually, you come to a stop. You take in the familiarity of the surroundings, of the damp smell, of the hollow drips echoing within the walls, of the eerie isolation which encroaches on you.

Several guards hover in front of the cell. A quiet sigh escapes you, though it doesn’t come as a surprise. With the fluidity it takes for you to knock out the guards in one swift movement, one would think the act to be like that of muscle memory. It’s not all that far off when considering just how many times you have done this, on top of your past merits as a Cloud Knight. Now left without any potential risks, you step out from the dreary shadows and make your way through the bars and into the chamber.

Laboured breaths; beads of sweat; a harsh crease between his brows; clothing torn and sullied. No matter how many times you see him in such a state, your heart lurches for him all the same.

With quick, light steps you draw closer. Features you are all too familiar with become clearer in spite of the dingy lighting, but your attention is more focused on the dark, murky wisp festering his soul.

“Those blasted Elders,” you mutter to yourself as you take in the young man’s haggard appearance. “Just what poison have they deceived him with this time…”

His body hangs limp against the metal restraints, ragged breaths wracking his worn body as his expression contorts into one of pain. Dark spots flicker ominously when your eyes skim his body. The burden wrought as a result of the Preceptors’ influence must weigh heavily on his mind if his soul is this contaminated to such an extent. (You dread to think of the lies they’ve been spewing to him about Dan Feng for him to be in this state of conflict.)

Your gaze stops at one particular point, its shadow more concentrated compared to the rest. “They made his soul murkier than it was just a few days ago!” And he’s sustained more bruises than before…

Immediately, your hands hover over his chest. A dim glow distorts the matted appearance of his skin, its shallow light allowing for you to get a closer look at the injuries he has sustained since your last visit. Eyes narrowed at a particularly concerning spot, you’re loath to believe the Elders have even a smidge of humanity left within them — assuming they even had any to begin with, that is.

Amidst your hushed curses towards the Vidyadhara Preceptors, a low groan resounds from in front. The once slack figure writhes against the chains, hissing at the uncomfortable friction the metal must no doubt be causing to his raw skin. You are about to move your attention to his wrists to help alleviate the pain until a flash of colour appears in your peripherals. You blink once, twice. Tilting your head up, you find yourself gazing into an unmistakably striking pair of teal eyes akin to that of the viridescent horns atop his head, the crimson which rests under his eyes and woven into a portion of his hair standing out despite the gloomy environment.

The faint clanging of metal brings you out of your daze. Oh. Right. He regained consciousness.

…Oops.

“You… What did you do?” His voice is hoarse — raspy. There is a slight edge in the gaze he regards you with, a precautionary means of defence. You can’t say you’re all that surprised. Rather, it makes you glad he remains on guard even though he has seen you a fair share of times.

Pausing the usage of your abilities, you cast your full attention onto him as you engage in this rare conversation. “I’m simply here to tend to your injuries and alleviate some of the burden weighing you down.”

(You’re not lying, per se, but you opt to omit the part wherein this selfishness within you merely wishes to save what you failed to before; an unnecessary burden you carry on behalf of someone long gone.)

“Thank you, but why go out of your way to help a sinner? You receive no benefit from this.”

A bitter smile stretches your lips at his words. A striking familiarity seeps within his tone, yet you’re no fool to mistake the man in front of you for someone who no longer walks the path of the living. You’re not like the rest of them who are stuck in the past.

“No one deserves to be shackled by past burdens. I hope that, one day, you can break free from the shadows of the past and live the way you desire. This is your life. No one has the right to dictate what you can and cannot do…” Your fists clench, eyes narrowing into a glare towards the ground. The next words leave a bitter taste in your mouth. “Not even those Elders have the right to do so.”

Silence follows your words. You take that as your cue to resume tending to him; he lets you.

Thinking back, he seems far more relaxed compared to when he was awake during your first couple of visits. He would shrink in on himself when you tried to cross a certain distance, his tail flicking anxiously in response as he regarded you with trembling yet hostile eyes. It’s a stark difference to how he is now. For one, his tail isn’t even out, having retreated when he came to realise you weren’t a threat nor were you going to harm him. He isn’t tense in your presence either, merely watching you do what you came here for with calm, slow blinks.

“Alright, all done here!” Leaning back with a huff, you bring a tentative hand to wipe away at the beads of sweat accumulating atop your forehead. There seemed to be more work than your previous cleanses, but you find the extra effort to be worth it when not even a speck of that murky contamination is left within him. Pride swells within you at your handy work. Haven’t lost my touch just yet!

Now with no reason to stay, you make a move to stand when a quiet murmur halts your movements.

“...You’re not calling me by that name.” When you give him an inquisitive look, he elaborates, “Dan Feng. You don’t call me by that name.”

That name roots you in place. Your mouth runs dry when his name is uttered in that voice, breathed out by that unnervingly similar face, senses growing dull as an all too familiar ache weighs down on your heart.

Your gaze drops momentarily before meeting with his own one — one riddled with confusion and a hunger for answers. “Because you’re not him. You are not Dan Feng, you are you.”

In spite of what all those Preceptors keep trying to hammer on about, how the Vidyadhara High Elder Dan Feng still lives and must face the consequences of his sins, how they have not diminished in power and influence, you find yourself to be one of the few who abstain from such beliefs. How could you not when you were someone privy to his private life, to his wants and hopes, his fears and worries, his dreams for a better future when all was said and done amidst your roles in history.

As such, you can hold your beliefs with confidence.

Dan Feng is gone. Dan Feng is dead. Dan Feng, despite the haunting similarities which stand before you, is not the one you’ve been looking out for within this seclusion. The incarnation in front of you is not the same man you have spent countless years by the side of, nor is he the one privy to the deepest, most intimate parts of yourself only few know of, just as you were with him.

“And…” You pause for a brief second before standing. His eyes follow your movements in caution, though you can tell your words resonate within him (the previous uncertainty which clung onto him is nowhere to be seen, for one). “I hope this is the last time we meet. For both our sakes.”

You lingering around him like some shadow will do the both of you no good, and you would be no different than all the others who hover around him for his status and power. It’s a decision you have long since come to terms with, one you knew would take place the moment you left your house to come here today.

It’s for the better, you tell yourself as you walk away. With this, perhaps you can finally allow yourself to let go of him and the past—

“Wait…!” There’s a shuffle behind you, the faint clinking of metal, a soft curse and grunt following soon after. Upon turning your head to gaze over your shoulder, you find yourself staring into glowing teal. “Every time I— ugh!” A pained gasp escapes him when he struggles too much against the restraints. Before you can reach out and alleviate his pain he merely shakes his head, signifying he has no need for your power. Not a second later, he continues. “Unlike the other blurred or vivid dreams I have of the previous life, every time I see or think of you my mind is calm. I know little-to-nothing of you, and yet, instinctively, I feel safe in your presence. Who are you?”

His words cause your eyes to widen and your stomach to drop. You weren’t expecting him to have some awareness of Dan Feng’s life and your identity, nor for his eyes to shine so brightly despite there being no light. Your teeth clench; your lips wobble. Someone must have tampered with his rebirth, or else he wouldn’t be able to recall even a single thing. You’ve heard some of the ways in which Dan Feng has been described by the Elders — how he is a criminal, a sinner, a monster, one who brought shame to the Vidyadhara name as the High Elder, and how he as his incarnation is no different.

He won’t be able to live this life as his own without being shadowed by the past. He won’t be able to escape the sins and burdens not meant to be carried by his shoulders. He will forever have the name and consequences wrought by his predecessor follow him instead of his valour and achievements, and the mere thought of it weighs heavy on your heart.

A wince involuntarily makes its way onto your features at the recollection; you don’t dare think about the cruelties they could have sneered into the young man’s ears when he was at his weakest and most susceptible to the brainwashing.

When you gather the courage to face him once more, you remember he asked you a question: “Who are you?” Looking into his eyes, there’s a hidden desperation in his gaze which causes your lips to naturally form the beginning phonemes of your name. But you stop, instead deciding it would be best to omit anything that could potentially implicate you with his previous incarnation. After all, for him to forge a path of his own, the past must remain as just that.

And so, with a light smile, you answer, “I’m just someone who doesn’t wish to see an innocent person bear the sins of their predecessor.”

He doesn’t have the chance to respond. You’re long gone from the confines of his chamber, as though you were never there to begin with, and he is left to stare into the abyssal darkness which has accompanied him throughout the entirety of his life. 

The only tell-tale sign of your presence being real is the warmth which spreads through his chest, warding off the dulled pain administered by the Preceptors.

In spite of your earlier words, the shackled Vidyadhara cannot help but to hope your paths cross once more. Whether that be within the tethers of a sinner, or perhaps in the distant future when he’s strong enough to leave his past burdens behind and start anew, he hopes he can talk to you as himself; as Dan Heng.

Maybe then you won’t have that pained look in your eyes when you gaze at him.

--

There’s a slight trickle of rain when you step foot outside into the Exalting Sanctum. It’s a stark contrast to the suffocating air of a cell, though the resulting chill which follows seems to be a worse trade-off.

You ought to have a word with whoever’s in charge of controlling the weather. Or at least get Jing Yuan to have a word with them. They certainly could have timed this better. What’s done is done, however, as chains of the past already begin to entrap you within its cold tethers.

“Forgive me,” you murmur, gaze upturned and blank as your body steadily becomes drenched in artificial rain. “Even your reincarnation will only know you as an emotionless sinner by word of those Elders.”

You must look terrible like this, soaked to the bone with nothing to cover you. You can picture him reprimanding your carelessness with that worried tone of his, laughing off his nags before he ultimately covers you with an umbrella and brings you back to his abode where a pot of hot tea and spare dry clothing awaits you.

But he’s not here to do all those things once more; nor is there anyone in the vicinity, for that matter. It is simply you, your grief, and your lonesome.

“You’re gone. Baiheng’s gone. Yingxing isn’t here. Neither is Jingliu. There’s only so much more Jing Yuan can try to carry by himself before he cracks. Or maybe he already has but remained stubborn as ever, hiding his burdens like always. And I… I’m just a coward who cannot do anything other than wish for the happier days to come back. I just want us to be happy again...” Warmth trickles down your cheeks, a stinging sensation blooming from within your senses. Abruptly, your voice quietens, barely a whisper. “Is that too much to ask?”

Had it not been for that prophecy of depravity and betrayal… would things be different now? Would everyone still be here drinking under the moonlight, telling stories of one-another (both the embarrassing and the emotional), sharing tears and laughter, sparring and honing one’s skills until muscles cried for rest and reprieve?

If you weren’t a coward back then — if you had just said or even just did something — would this all have been a mere nightmare they would tease you in good nature for?

You laugh, humourless. “Hah. What am I doing? It’s not like you can hear me if I talk to the rain. You would’ve given me an answer years ago if that were the case.”

A bitter taste lingers then, ceasing the rest of your words and instead causing you to choke up.

Inhale, exhale. Through the nose, out the mouth.

Having calmed down, your eyes stray towards the outside of the ship, taking in the bleeding hues of purple and blue distorted by the rain. Motionless, you remain in a trance for a few moments.

“...Remember that plan we talked about before?” you begin once more, voice steady unlike a few moments prior. “The one of all of us travelling planet to planet and exploring life beyond missions and the Luofu? Well, I think it’s about time one of us keeps to our word. I guess I should prepare to say goodbye to Jing Yuan soon.” A half-hearted chuckle escapes you at that. Your eyes close and drop with a sigh, a wry smile stretching the line of your lips. “Do you think he’ll resent me for leaving him as well?”

Silence is your only response, and you come to realise the rain has stopped. When you lift your gaze, the moon shines bright through the lingering mist. It’s almost reminiscent of happier days, when you were young and free, only having to worry about preventing a scuffle between Yingxing and Jing Yuan from breaking out, sometimes sharing a drink with Jingliu as Baiheng chattered away about her day. But most often were nights such as this spent together with Dan Feng, wiling away the nights stargazing and reminiscing missions and basking in one another’s quiet company.

It’s about time I move on, too.

With a swift turn you begin the trek home. For the first time in a long while, you have a goal — a hope and a dream to your name. Your mind recollects the young man’s gaze, how his eyes burned brighter than the sun itself in that one instance. Despite your prior words, a part of you hopes you meet once more when he truly discovers himself; for who he really is as opposed to the ghost which clings to his being.

For someone who can still create such an expression despite those conditions, his future is limitless.

(That night, after having packed your essentials in preparation of heading out the following day and penned a letter for Jing Yuan to read in your disappearance, you had a dream. Through your fragmented recollection, you recalled a woman with a comforting smile; a man wise beyond his years; a familiar, yet unfamiliar, young man who wields a calm aura; a cute girl with boundless energy; a stoic-looking girl with unexpected charm; a rabbit-like creature dressed akin to a conductor; and you… you were happy. Happy in a way you never thought you would be again.

It was a lovely dream.)

if you enjoyed this, then reblogs with/or comments are greatly appreciated !! <33

[sparkles-rule-4eva]

"Can't Die with Regrets."

SONIC 3 SPOILERS!!!

Based on this post

AO3 version

“If neither of you have the guts to help me, then I’ll do it alone.”

Words that Sonic was regretting. Severely.

It had been nearly an hour since he’d last seen his brothers. In a fit of rage, and grief, and too many negative feelings for him to process, he’d all but stolen the Master Emerald and hunted down Shadow, fully intending to kill him.

Looking back at himself, the way he’d just lost control, he felt ashamed, but he could still remember why he’d done it in the first place. He still could feel the paralyzing fear that had gripped him when he’d found Tom unconscious, completely unresponsive. Fear that had quickly turned into an early kind of grief, reminding him all too much of a night long ago, when he’d found himself alone in an unfamiliar forest at night, crying over the loss of Longclaw.

His first parent.

Things had been fuzzy. He was scared. He was stressed. He was angry.

He had not waited ten painful years for his family, only to have it stripped away from him again. He didn’t know what he would do without them. Without his dad.

“What kind of hero abandons his friends to pursue revenge? Abandons his family?” Shadow’s chilling words still echoed in his mind. He hadn’t had an answer. All he’d been able to feel was rage, and grief, and a spiraling sense of being completely out of control.

And while the fury had subsided as he remembered Tom’s words to him recently, about not letting his pain from losing Longclaw change who he was, the grief had stayed. The fear had stayed. Even as he let go of Shadow, as they sat and talked about their experiences with loss, the pain continued to burn in his chest.

Sonic pushed it to the back of his mind as they both charged up on the Chaos Emeralds and went to stop the giant cannon about to destroy a chunk of Earth. Talking with Shadow had helped him a little, as he reminded them both about how they could deal with their grief and their pain. Finally befriending this edgy other hedgehog had done him well. Fighting alongside him was even its own brand of fun.

But it was hard to not think about his family.

How the last he’d seen his parents, his father was in some kind of coma and being taken into an ambulance. His mother was looking at him and his brothers… strangely, as she sat with her husband. With a blank expression, one that chilled him and stirred a different fear entirely in his stomach.

Like she wasn’t quite sure of them anymore.

And his brothers?

He had not parted with them on friendly terms. He’d been in the thick of his grief-induced anger still. He’d snapped at Tails for attempting to comfort him, and had nearly fought with Knuckles over his demands for the Master Emerald. Knuckles had refused to fight him, which in hindsight made him feel even worse.

He wanted to apologize to them. But he didn’t know where they were.

In the distance, the huge cannon thing was crackling with chaos energy, clearly about to fire. Shadow dealt with the last of the bots that they’d been fighting, then they were both making a beeline for the cannon.

It probably wouldn’t destroy the entire earth— it was a precision weapon— but it would still kill many innocent lives. At the moment, it was aimed directly for London.

As far as Sonic knew, his entire family was down there.

So the only plan he could come up with in the panic of the moment was to block the hit directly, using the combined chaos powers of both himself and Shadow.

It was a big risk for sure, but there was no way he was letting that blast hit the earth.

“Now this might hurt a little!” he yelled to Shadow, as they flew directly up in the line of fire.

The cannon unleashed its blast.

It hurt more than a little, as they both raised their arms to create an invisible shield of sorts, blocking the blast, protecting those far below.

“This was your plan?” Shadow demanded beside him, his voice strained as he squinted against the blinding light.

Sonic didn’t answer, grunting as he tried to conserve his quickly-draining energy. Desperate for any kind of hope, he hollered, “Would someone mind shutting down the giant death ray?!”

He figured it was just the Robotniks up there, and they were the ones who’d planned this whole thing, but somehow his plea was answered. Slowly but surely, the continuous blast started to tilt, gradually away from the earth.

However, it was quickly getting harder and harder to keep blocking it. The ray was hot and excruciating to the touch, only less so because he was in golden god mode, but even that energy was starting to… fade.

Sonic gritted his teeth, nearly whimpering as he struggled to keep on blocking it. Hundreds of people are at risk down there! he snapped at himself silently. Including your family. Keep at it!

The ray continued to turn, slowly.

The edges of his vision started going dark.

He shook his head slightly, glaring up at the ray. The ray glared back at him.

You HAVE to do it! You have to get back to them! You have to see if Dad will be okay. You have to check on Mom. You have to apologize to Knuckles and Tails. YOU HAVE TO!

SO KEEP AT IT!

“Can’t… hold… much… longer!” he gasped out, as if whoever was turning the ray could hear him. Shadow looked over at him for a split second, then immediately turned back forward, pushing even harder against the blast.

Sonic couldn’t risk looking down to see how far the ray had turned from the earth. All he could do was keep looking up, keep hoping against hope that they were going to save everyone— and make it out alive. Both of which he couldn’t afford not to do.

But it wasn’t looking likely.

He didn’t have any more energy he could just summon out of nowhere. And he was very quickly running out of time.

And even as he struggled against the ray, his heart began to sink.

He had too many regrets. Too many things he still needed to say. Too many things he still didn’t know.

Stupid cannon should’ve waited a bit longer, at least so he could’ve gotten a chance to do all that.

But, just like throughout this whole ordeal, he was absolutely powerless with such a thing.

It was too late.

The darkness at the edges of his vision spread, as his arms and body started going numb. And with a final yelp, he blacked out.

The last thing he registered was a hand on his shoulder, forcefully shoving him to the right. Then everything went blank.

---

Sonic had truly thought he was going to die.

If he’d fainted while still in the direct path of the death ray, he would’ve gotten incinerated.

But that hand that’d pushed him… had it gotten him out of the way? Shadow had saved him?

His consciousness slowly edged its way back in, stirred by the sound of coughing. As his senses recovered, he realized he was lying down, sprawled half on an earthy floor, halfway on top of someone else…

Vision and hearing foggy, he squeezed his eyes shut tighter for a moment before wearily blinking them open. “Sonic, look,” a young, familiar voice said quietly.

Slowly, shakily, Sonic pushed himself to his feet, still trying to register what was happening, where he was, what was going on. But as he looked up, the memories returned, and another wave of grief hit him hard.

There was a huge, nebular mass in the sky above them, clearly the result of some kind of massive explosion. Tails had gone on excited rants to him in past months about astronomy, and stars, and what happened when they exploded. How they left a beautiful nebula blanketing the space around them even after they were gone.

“Shadow and Robotnik,” Tails said quietly beside him, staring with a hollow look up at the remains in the sky. “They sacrificed themselves… to save everyone.”

…Oh.

Shadow was gone.

Sonic looked at the distant fire, swallowing. “You always have a choice,” he murmured, remembering how he’d told that to Shadow right before they’d gone in to stop the death ray.

“The light shines, even though the star is gone,” was what Shadow had said, as they’d sat and reminisced on the moon’s surface.

They’d saved Earth, and everyone on it, but Shadow had given everything to make the right choice in the end. He’d become his own fallen star, like Maria, and he would shine on even now that he was gone.

Sonic’s chest ached. For all the drama and violence and pain of the last few days, he would never forget Shadow. The words they had shared stuck with him. Shadow had not deserved to die. He’d become a hero when it had mattered the most.

And so had Robotnik, apparently.

Sonic swallowed again, then turned to face his brothers, a sudden dread pooling in his heart. In what he’d thought were his final moments up there, he’d been desperate to live so he could apologize, and he’d pictured himself dramatically rushing back, shouting out the “I’M SO SORRY”s, hugging everyone left and right, rushing to do everything he thought he couldn’t. But now that he was faced with the real opportunity, and the reality of what had happened, he… was scared.

Scared that he’d gone too far. That they wouldn’t trust him again after he’d betrayed their oath.

Especially as he realized that Knuckles and Tails must’ve saved him after he fell. Even after what he’d said to them. It was the only explanation for how he’d woken up piled with them both in the middle of a corn field, relatively unharmed for having apparently fallen all the way from space.

“Guys, I’m really sorry for running off like that,” he said softly, avoiding the two pairs of eyes locked on him. His heart pounded uncomfortably in his chest. “I shouldn’t have left you behind.”

He dared to meet Knuckles’s eyes. The echidna stared back at him, his eyes hard.

“The truth is,” he went on, shifting his gaze again, “you’re the best teammates a hedgehog could ever ask for.” He glanced at Tails, the words spilling out now, and he was struck with a sudden gratefulness that he was here, getting to say all this, when he’d truly thought he’d missed the chance. “And the best friends,” he quickly added. “…Can you ever forgive me?”

Sonic held his breath. Silence reigned. His heart skipped a few beats.

Knuckles continued to stare.

Then the echidna slowly raised a fist towards him. “Team Sonic?” he asked quietly.

Sonic stared at his brother’s extended fist for a moment, almost weak as relief rushed through him. In a rush of emotion, he smiled like a sap and lurched forwards to hug Knuckles close, grasping to pull in Tails as well. “How about, just ‘team’,” he replied softly, resting his head against the echidna’s chest and wrapping his arms around both him and Tails.

His teammates. His friends. His best friends.

His brothers.

----------------------

there will be a second chapter soon btw

[vigilskeep]

really enjoy a habit i’ve noticed in lucanis fic of forcing him to fly down to catch a falling and/or drowning rook. that’s good

[marlsswrites]

Summer camp AU, part 31!!

July 31st, final part <3

Age - @jegulus-microfic - words: 1079

First part Previous part

Protective arms hung over his shoulders, moving his fingers softly and adjusting his arms onto the guitar in his hands into the perfect position. This had been his morning, the golden sun shone in lines through the blinds, every other second catching his eye and all he could see was sunlight for a few moments.

A breath so close to his neck flushed him from his shoulders to the tips of his once pale skinned ears.

"One, two, three." His favourite voice whispered. "There you go." As beautiful music flowed from the instrument. 

"Why did you bring a guitar?" Regulus snorted after a few seconds, looking up at James through adoring eyes and new found fantasies. 

"I left it in my car, thought I may as well bring it in." He shrugged, hands still around the younger man - who just hummed in response and continued to brush his fingers against the rough guitar strings. Normally he wouldn't persist this long, but when James had his arms around Regulus like that, he'd stay here forever and do anything James asked of him.

Shortly after, the arms unwound themselves and he instantly felt full of empty and cold. He let out a whine of annoyance, twisting his head up and glaring at James. "What?" James laughed. "You've got the hang of it now."

"No I haven't." He lied, attempting to play a horrible chord on the guitar. "I need more help."

An eyebrow raise. "Do you?"

He only nodded, placing the guitar down on the floor and folding his arms stubbornly as he watched the smile become harder to fight away from James' stunning face. 

He finally broke, tackling Regulus into a hug and knocking them both onto the bed behind them, laughs and giggled breaking out between the two as Regulus smiled more than he feels he ever has in his life. 

Kisses tattooed his neck, hands massaged his hip bones and lips smiled into his own. Eyes opened in front of his, hazel meeting grey in the light of the sun. Yet one could see the green decorating the brown, and the other counted every speck of blue in those grey eyes - every single detail.

-

A splash in the water snapped Regulus from his daze, James was grinning, hair wet and stuck to his forehead yet still looking perfect. Lips twisted around soft words as he beckoned Regulus to come and join him with grabby hands and an utterly adorable pout.

"Jamie-"

"You can hold onto me?" James smiled as he approached Regulus, who sat on the pier with crossed legs and a book in his hands, finally letting go and smiling the smile he'd been hiding behind built up walls since he met James. Those walls fell, crumbled, disappeared as he got closer to the brunette.

He sighed. "Okay." He spoke through his smile as wet James' hands slipped onto his waist and pulled him into the water, swirling him around and kissing his shoulder while Regulus laughed and wrapped his legs around his love.

Quickly, James plunged under the water, keeping a hold on Regulus' cold arms as he did so. The man tugged ever so slightly, encouraging Regulus to join him. As he sank lower into the water, he felt the ice liquid prick at every bit of skin on his body like needles, but that soon went away when he opened his eyes and felt a hand on his cheek.

Air bubbles shaped like pearls fell from both of their smiling, swollen, kissed lips as James laughed out a chuckle that was silenced by the water surrounding them almost like it was protecting the two men.

Pulling on the gold chain around James' marked neck, he kissed James like he was the only oxygen left in this world, the only healer for the pain that he once had, the only warmth in this cold arctic or the only light in a dark room that was Regulus Black. 

-

"Can we stay like this forever?"

"In this moment?" Regulus questioned.

James nodded, resting his head on Regulus' shoulder. Both gazed out at the sunset, at the way it reflected onto the water and bounced back into their wanting eyes. Regulus' eyes would flick between the actual sun, and his sun - he much preferred the second one. Because his sun had one thing the real one didn't have, a heart so loving it threatened to break Regulus in two.

"Yeah." He nodded. "Let's stay like this forever." Combing his hand through messy hair, he pressed a soft kiss into the brunette's waves and finally took a moment to look around at where they were.

This is the part of the pier where Regulus sat on his first day at camp, sulking and cursing at the sky, because why must this decide his fate? He didn't want it - he didn't think he wanted it anyway - turns out that there was always a part of him that loved James Potter, he was just too blind to see it.

But now, touching, feeling and loving the boy with the golden frames seemed to knock him off his feet in a way not even Shakespeare could explain. His view on everything, everyone, himself and James included, changed so much - certainly for the better.

He watched his sunlight breathe, he felt his heartbeat under his hands, his heat radiating like a replica of the sun on Regulus' bare shoulder. He would indeed take the sun in his hands, not caring if it burnt him, because the feeling in the moment was so amazing he doesn't think he's ever planning on letting go.

"I love you." He whispered into the breeze that blew on both of the boys.

"I love you more." The brunette lifted his head to look at Regulus, smiling a soft smile at the boys fond face. A pair of lips pressed into his, adoring, caring, careful, loving, healing lips.

He ran his tongue along James' bottom lip, stroking the older mans neck as he pressed their foreheads together with a tilt to his forever loved and joyed lips. "Not possible."

And this was it, he would forever keep this man. He never thought he needed much sunlight to survive, but James proved him entirely wrong. Now that he knows what it feels like to finally have someone as wonderful as James Potter warm his once slow beating heart, he would be ever so stupid to let that man go, not even after they're both aged and gone.

After all, James is his sunlight, and Regulus is his star.

[serickswrites]

Spare

Part 2 Alternate Part 2

Warnings: captivity, torture, restraints, self sacrifice, forced to watch, drowning, mcd

"Please," Caretaker sobbed as Whumper stalked towards them, "please spare me, Whumper. Spare me." They couldn't stand this. Any of this. Whumper would torture them, kill them even, if given the chance. They couldn't let that happen to them.

"Why would I do that, Caretaker? Your terror is absolutely delightful. Especially compared to how stoic Whumpee is. I would much rather hurt someone who is openly afraid. It's much more," Whumper paused dramatically as they stopped short of Caretaker, "enjoyable."

Caretaker pulled on the cuffs keeping them restraint. "Please, please, spare me!"

"Take me instead," Whumpee offered quietly. They hadn't said much said Caretaker had screamed at them to shut up. Caretaker had wailed and wailed for hours, cursing Whumper and blaming Whumpee for being trapped.

"We're in this mess because of you!" Caretaker shouted when Whumpee had tried to comfort them. "I wish I had never listened to you!"

"I'm sorry, Caretaker. It's going to be ok. We're going to be ok."

"Whumper is going to torture us and kill us! How is that ok? I wish I had never listened to you. I hate you! I wish I never met you!"

Whumpee went silent after that. Caretaker hadn't cared. They were too absorbed in their own panic to care. Whumper was going to torture them both. They had to find a way out.

"Take me instead," Whumpee repeated. They didn't look at Caretaker. They didn't sound afraid. They stared at Whumper, their determination clear.

"You're volunteering for this?" Whumper cocked a brow. "You could die, Whumpee. Are you sure? You don't want to let Caretaker go in your place? They said some awful things earlier."

Whumpee nodded. "Take me. Hurt me. Leave Caretaker alone."

Whumper's grin grew. "Very well then, this will be fun, I can tell. You're going to prove to be quite the challenge, Whumpee." Whumper hurried over and unhooked Whumpee from the chains, still keeping their wrists cuffed. "We'll see how long you last. The brave ones either go pretty fast, or they last for a long time. Which flavor are you?"

Whumpee thrust their chin out. "You'll get to find out, but you can't hurt Caretaker."

Whumper nodded. "Yes, yes. Hurt you. Only you. Leave Caretaker alone. No problem."

Whumpee walked willingly with Whumper over to the large tub in the center of the room. It was rusty in spots and filled with cold, cold water. "Kneel," Whumper commanded.

Whumpee slowly got to their knees. They still didn't look at Caretaker. They stared straight ahead. Caretaker was too afraid to say anything. Too afraid to draw attention to themself. Surely Whumper would hold Whumpee under a few times and then leave them in a sopping sobbing mess.

"Let's see how long you can hold your breath for," Whumper said as they kicked Whumpee's legs wide and knelt between them. They held Whumpee briefly to their chest before shoving Whumpee's head below the surface.

Whumpee, to their credit, held very still for a while. They didn't move. Didn't thrash. Didn't try to buck Whumper off. They merely let their head be held under the water.

"Well this is dull," Whumper said as they held Whumpee's head beneath the water. "Let's make this more interesting." They punched Whumpee in the ribs hard.

Caretaker could see bubbles rush from Whumpee's lips. "That's cheating, Whumper! They weren't fighting!"

"Exactly," Whumper said as they put all their weight on the hand keeping Whumpee's head beneath the water. Whumpee bucked and thrashed wildly beneath Whumper's hand. "This is much more fun."

"They're drowning. You're killing them!" Caretaker shouted. Their heart hammered in their chest, fearing for Whumpee's life.

"They won't drown yet," Whumper said as they lifted Whumpee's head from the water. Whumpee gasped and choked, water spewing from their lips. "See? Not dead."

Before Whumpee could get a good breath or Caretaker could say anything, Whumper shoved Whumpee's head below the surface again. "Please! Don't kill them!" Caretaker begged. They had wanted to be spared. They had wanted to be safe. But they didn't want it to come at the cost of Whumpee being drowned to death.

"Killing them too quick will ruin my fun. I want this to last as long as possible."

Whumper repeated the process countless times. Caretaker's throat was raw from shouting at Whumper. But it hadn't mattered. Whumper had kept their word and only went after Whumpee. Caretaker remained untouched.

"Let's see if you can last just a bit longer, Whumpee. If you do, you're the longest lasting toy I've ever had. Isn't that wonderful?"

Whumpee's eyes were unfocused. Their chest heaved and it was unclear if they could even hear Whumper. Caretaker had to figure a way out. Whumpee couldn't last much longer.

Whumper shoved Whumpee completely into the tub, submerging Whumpee in the icy water. "This is much more fun this way."

"Whumper!" Caretaker shouted as Whumper stepped into the tub, pressing one boot on Whumpee to keep them below the water. Whumpee's legs flailed wildly as they tried to kick out. "Whumper! Let them go! Don't kill them, Whumper!"

Whumpee's foot connected with Whumper's knee and Whumper stumbled. With a growl, Whumper kicked Whumpee in the face. They knelt in the water, pinning Whumpee completely. Caretaker hollered and yelled for Whumper to stop, but Whumper couldn't hear over the splashing water. Whumper punched Whumpee over and over. Their anger was unrelenting. Rage contorted their features into a grotesque mask of anger.

Slowly, Whumpee's frantic kicking stopped. Slowly, Whumpee's thrashing in the water stopped. Slowly, the water grew still once more.

"Let them up, they can't breathe!" Caretaker urged Whumper.

But Whumper didn't acknowledge them. They ignored Caretaker and instead glared down at Whumpee beneath the water. "Whumper! Whumper!" Caretaker tried again. But Whumper ignored them.

Finally, after what felt an age, Whumper stood up. Caretaker didn't let out the breath they were holding. They wouldn't, not until they could see Whumpee breathing again. "Well, so much for longest lasting toy," Whumper finally said.

"What?" Caretaker's blood froze. No. No. This couldn't be true.

"I don't think anyone could have survived that, Caretaker. Whumpee's good, but five minutes below the water good? I don't think so."

"NO!"

Whumper reached beneath the water and grabbed Whumpee by the throat and lifted. Whumpee's head lolled in Whumper's hands. Their hair was plastered to their face, obscuring their features from view. Their limbs hung limply as Whumper lifted them higher. "Not my longest lasting, but certainly one of my most fun."

"Whumpee, Whumpee, say something!"

Whumper rolled their eyes. "Caretaker I told you, no one could have survived that long. Whumpee can't answer you. They're dead. See?"

Whumper tossed Whumpee like a ragdoll towards Caretaker. Whumpee landed in a heap where they remained unmoving. This couldn't be happening. Couldn't be true. Whumper stalked over and kicked Whumpee onto their back. Their body offered no resistance as they rolled.

"Whumpee, please," Caretaker whispered, refusing to believe Whumper. Whumper had lied before. Because if Whumper was telling the truth, then Whumpee had died in their place. After they said all of those awful things. Caretaker wouldn't be able to live with themself if this were true.

"Look, Caretaker, look," Whumper said with a dark chuckle as they brushed Whumpee's sopping hair off their face.

Something broke inside Caretaker as they stared into Whumpee's half lidded eyes. Something broke as they stared at Whumpee's slack jaw, their lips parted for the gulp of air they would never get. Something broke as they stared at Whumpee's lifeless body.

Caretaker sobbed, unable to articulate anything into words. This was their fault. This was all their fault. Whumpee was dead because they had been a coward. And they had said terrible things to Whumpee. And now Whumpee was dead. Had died thinking Caretaker hated them. Had died for Caretaker.

"Still," Whumper said as they stared down into Whumpee's lifeless eyes, "one of the most fun toys I've ever had. It's a shame they had to break."

Tags: @mousepaw @jumpywhumpywriter @knightinbatteredarmor @hufflepuffwritingstuff2 @anightmarishwhump

@steh-lar-uh-nuhs @celestialsoyeon @st0rmm @ay5ksal @pedro-pedro-pedro-pedro-pe

@artisticdemon

[crow-with-a-pencil]

Hi @naffeclipse I'm very normal about your fic. Have some frantic midnight sketches as extra kudos along with some tag rambling :)

[sometimeswritingsometimesdying]

fellas is it gay to steal your best friend's jacket with his last name on it?

[diaryofamadsunwukongfan]

One big, happy family/s

[verdantglow]

I finished reading Not friends, no we're something in between by @prudentseer about 45 minutes ago.

I am still getting hit by random waves of residual emotion whenever the slightest thought of it creeps back up in my mind.

Please go read this fic, y'all. Please. It's so good. Please.

[amrv-5]

Going to walk into the fucking water 🙏👍🚶➡️🌊

[lowkeyren]

Hii I hope I'm not intruding, but I was overcome with the urge to rant after I read your alhaitham childhood sweetheart fic. Truly amazing piece of work. Genuinely, my jaw is hanging. I had to clutch my heart in fear it would grow legs and leap out of my chest. Was absolutely swooning.

Anyways. I just wanted to say how Fanfiction is one of the best things to ever exist in this world. It has the potential to ruin and destroy but also heal and fulfill. And I can't appreciate artists enough in this regard because they bring to life, life. If that makes sense. They color a black and white world. They fill the heart with so much imagination and instill so much hope. Love exists because of their creative liberty. And the way writers incorporate all these seemingly minor details to a character just builds them in a light we either yearn for or relate to. I'm rambling this off to you solely because of how much I love alhaitham and how much your fic truly brought me to life. It was insanely well written in my eyes. I loved alhaithams portrayal. I loved the idea.

You captured it so well that i could taste the sweetness of a sweet on my tongue. Oooh and that little moment with alhaitham, cyno, nari and kaveh left me grinning so hard. LIKE I LOVE THE DIALOGUE. nothing too wow or dramatic but it fits and flows o well together with the characters and the story. oh lord and when alhaitham meets us at the end. I'm in love with the way he loves us. [without waiting for an answer, you decide to indulge him, linking your pinky with his. as your thumbs briefly touch, you catch the look in his eyes —serious, yet with a softness that makes your heart skip. “a promise that i’ll be by your side as long as sugar tastes sweet,” he says, his voice low and sincere.] This needs to be framed and hung on my wall. AS LONG AS SUGAR TASTES SWEET? GET OUT OF HERE. adorable. Heart twisting, gut wrenching. I'm rolling on the dirt floor crying. And then u have him say ["so come back with me"]

I'm in a romantic mood. I'll go cry about this. Not getting over it ever. You're amazing. Thank you

YOU😭🥺💧Eu💧💧E E😭😭 E EUE🥺🥺😭UUUUE😭🥺💧🥺😭 ue 💧ee😭🥺💧ue 🥺e e e😭e💧🥺😭Uueuuue💧💧you😭🥺ee e🥺🥺😭eUEE 💧🥺💧EEE 💧💧😭U E 🥺😭EE H💧🥺😭E EUU💧🥺😭yo u🥺💧😭EUEH🥺😭💧💧ue e😭😭eeeeee💧💧💧uu🥺😭 euuuee😭🥺YOUUU🥺😭💧

HEYA NO URE NOT INTRUDING AT ALL!!!! u actually made my made my whole week. no joke :') TYSM FOR READING THE FIC IM SO GLAD PPL LIKED IT AHHHHHH

your ask legit left me speechless for like 3 days straight. to hear that my fic had that kind of impact on you, esp on alhaitham's characterization, is beyond rewarding. genuinely, thank you for taking the time to share your comments with me —it seriously means the world to me!!!! (GOD URE SO SWEET URE SO SWEET URE SO S— cavities.)

AND YOU LOVING THE DIALOGUE? THANK YOU, I STRUGGLED WITH THAT SO MUCH ARRUGHHH (cus i was like dang this is such a perfect chance to include a 4ggravate scene but i was so worried i wld mischaracterize them LMAO)

dw i lowkey giggled at alhaitham's last few lines too (so come back w me / as long as sugar tastes sweet) i tried out other lines, but i ended up sticking with these ones because it felt the most impactful to me SO IM THRILLED TO HEAR THAT OTHERS THINK SO TOO (˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶) .ᐟ.ᐟ

you, you're amazing, dear reader. thank you for your kind words, you lovely wonderful sweet soul <3

[howdidthisevenhappenanyway]

I reread my story kindness the other day, the first fic that I published in star wars, and it’s not perfect but I was really cooking with that scene where maul loses a duel with a pissy upset obi-wan kenobi because he is offended that he got given the padawan to fight instead of the master and the padawan isn’t even that powerful.

and obi-wan is like you’re having a crisis? feeling neglected and a little disappointed? welcome to my life’ and wins the duel because he has those crises every mission he goes on, lmao

obi-wan: oh qui-gon just took off and left me here to sort this shit out. I feel abandoned but what’s new. just another taungsday

maul: this was supposed to be the day I kill a jedi master and what do I get? this little shit. this is devastating for me

[mispatchedgreens]

the house, its crow

The sudden and treacherous addition of a horrible interloper to Ouyang's life and home

(part of the kitchen extended universe, chronologically precedes all other installments)

[crazy-fangirl2524]

Things I’m so grateful for in tsc (things I was praying would become canon and they did and I will kiss the floor Nora walks on)

TSC SPOILERS BELOW

Jean having a crush on Kevin (the unrequited love omg)

The end of tkm in another pov (I love reading about the foxes in another pov especially Jean’s)

Jean describing Neil (finally the recognition of Neil being completely unhinged and dangerous)

Jerejean pining on both sides (we won but at what cost)

Jean/renee acknowledging how the thing between them wouldn’t work even if they wanted to try (right person wrong time)

Stuart

Basically I feel like everything I read was somehow already in some fanfics I’ve read (so nothing much surprised me because I was expecting the worst) but obv this is way better and it’s CANON

Actually just the entire tsc I love it so much I wouldn’t change a single thing about it and I’m so grateful Nora wrote this