#feels depressing.

[stil-lindigo]

lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)

if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.

--

no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.

I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.

I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.

If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.

[disc80s]

[slightly-awkward-sunshine]

Anyone else stuck in a freeze response for years and years and years and years

[icharchivist]

I did hear that the OG was a bit obtuse and especially when the world opened up later, you kinda had to talk to every NPC for breadcrumbs leading to your next destination, and I actually love doing that? I love talking to every NPC in a video game! I play Pokémon to go into everyone's houses and talk to them, that's the best part!

Maybe in the Remake they tried to avoid frustrating people by having things be so unclear, but they could've figured out a happy medium. Maybe optional quest markers

The newer Zelda games let you disable quest markers if you love stumbling ass backwards into problems and solutions

We have the technology, is all I'm saying

yeah right!!

Like it's true the OG becomes a bit confusing when you unlock the open world, there's some point where it becomes hard to remember where you're supposed to go, and if you stopped playing in the middle of exploring and forgot what you were doing, you're out of luck! Not to mention also super weird stuff and secret place to unlock some limit breaks (thinking about that one NPC that will give you Aerith's final Limit Breaks after you walked a certain amount of steps with a Materia). that's definitely an issue, but it's also... fun? to have you figure out where to go next by talking with people?

and like, the OG didn't have quest markers or even an easy to use map, so it's kinda confusing yeah, but just adding that would already help a lot without completely cutting down on interreacting with the scenery?

like yeah pretty much, the OG was confusing sure, but in ways that modern technology could help out without removing the detective aspect of trying to talk with people to figure out where you go next.

there HAS to be a middle ground between leaving you fully on your own in the OG and taking your hand on literally everything in the Remake, yaknow?

esp also since the first part of the Remake follows the one "linear" portion of the game where you mostly have to go from one map to another without specifically having any way to leave the area you need to stay in.

Like the Shinra building is normally kind of one puzzle or detective work by floor in order to unlock the key to unlock the next floor, so all of them come with the aspect of letting you discover each floors.

in the remake it's really just going from one quest marker to the other instead, and every exploration bits are instead replaced with cutscenes that tells you straight up what to do and it's just.... why... where is the interactive aspect of it...

idk it feels frustrating, and if it happened only for one or two quests it's whatever, but at this point it's been systematic and anything that's supposed to feel like something you worked for in the OG ends up just.... well. being hand held instead through everything. Once or twice is fine, but when it's all the time it's just. man what the point.

i miss the OG 😔

[emotionaleating]

pls don’t flirt with me i want to be nonchalant so bad but i unfortunately crave connection so intensely that i will give you my entire soul and forgive you over and over until i’ve lost myself completely and feel like i’m drowning

[ibikus]

tumblr users when someone asks them what they did on april 1st

[professionallyunstable]

kinda tired fighting for a life i don’t even want

[densewentz]

When a cunty witch beats you to death then steals your boy toy for eternal torment 😢 (based on that 'don't you miss her???' meme)

[injuredsoullessfrog]

[rainywhispersblog]

[lostmf]

[sleeplessv0id]

maybe in another universe, I can ask for help when I need it.

[commonzinnia]

maybe i wasn’t meant to be loved

[emotionaleating]

[vixensofdeath]

I am so tired and burnt out, I don’t even know what I’m doing anymore

[professionallyunstable]

“whats wrong with you” - a lot actually