#compulsive behavior

[storytellerslense]

JJ Maybank character analysis

How parentification shaped JJ's personality

Part 2

Victim role, low self-esteem and compulsive caregiving

Especially in the first season of Outer Banks there are moments where JJ is not fully respected by his friends, the Pogues, and he often accepts this dismissive treatment. For instance, his ideas are frequently brushed off, and he is called names like "dumbass," reinforcing his belief that he is not valued or taken seriously. JJ tolerates this treatment, likely due to his low self-esteem and his desperate need to maintain these relationships, as flawed as they may be.

Additionally, JJ voluntarily gets himself into situations where he simply can't win, exemplifying his compulsive caregiving and martyr complex. For example, he confronts a group of Kooks alone to defend his friends, even though he knows he is outnumbered and likely to lose the fight. This behavior underscores his willingness to sacrifice himself for the sake of others, even when it is detrimental to his own well-being. He also constantly highlights how the Kooks have the advantage, which, while often true, also shows how he puts himself in the victim role more than the other Pogues.

JJ's low self-esteem is most poignantly visible in his interactions with Kiara in Season 3 Episode 4.

JJ feels uncomfortable when Kiara is getting close to him

When Kiara confesses her love for him, JJ's immediate reaction is to dismiss it. Kiara tries to confront him again, reminding him of an affectionate moment on the boat where they almost kissed. But JJ shrugs her off, recollecting the moment as "just weird", later admitting that he has issues getting close to someone.

Considering that JJ probably had a lifelong experience with parentification, it has caused him to prioritize others' needs over his own, leading to poorly developed emotional boundaries and a lack of understanding of his own desires. Coupled with his low self-esteem from his abusive upbringing, JJ struggles to believe he deserves love and affection. So when faced with Kiara's romantic interest, he feels confused and uncomfortable, questioning his worthiness and feeling that someone as stable as Kiara couldn't genuinely want to be with him.

Another point is that the potential relationship with Kiara represents a significant change and requires vulnerability, which JJ finds unsettling due to his need to always be strong and in control. This internal conflict makes the near-kiss feel strange and out of place for him. When admitting to his feeling of unworthiness, describing it as "not even having a home or parents" Kiara offers him help, which he refuses, illustrating once again his difficulty in accepting care from others.

JJ's low self-esteem and compulsive caregiving are deeply rooted in his responsibility thrust upon him from a young age and the lack of nurturing from his father which led JJ to develop a skewed sense of self-worth, believing that his value lies in what he can do for others rather than who he is. However, this can also expose JJ to extreme stress and anxiety. This is notably seen when JJ and John B. encounter smugglers threatening Miss Lana at her house in Season 1, Episode 2.

JJ's decision not to help Miss Lana once the smugglers are gone can be attributed to a combination of emotional overload, psychological exhaustion, and his complex relationship with trust and authority.

Contrary to his usual impulsive and confrontational nature, JJ experiences an anxiety attack, urging John B. to leave rather than confront the danger. This reaction can be interpreted as a symptom of his chronic stress and trauma of having experienced his abusive father. The sound of someone being beaten and threatened might evoke a generalized trauma response, leading to anxiety and a desire to escape the situation. This reaction could be seen as a form of PTSD, where certain triggers cause an overwhelming urge to flee rather than fight.

******I am sorry. This time I had to hurry and I wanted to get this done before going on holiday tomorrow. Thanks you so much your support, for reposting and giving me thumbs up!!! I find JJ to be a very interesting character with surprisingly much depth for a series like Outer Banks, probably because he is portrayed most relatable and realistic. If you have any other suggestions and ideas on what to do next, let me know.******

[deepinsamsara]

Here's an idea:

Instead of doing that thing?

Just sit still.

[mental-mona]

We don't do compulsive behaviors because we lack willpower. We do them because it's the only way we know how to self soothe. Soothing is an instinctual behavior, not a moral one.

- Dr. Nicole Lepera

[thecouncilofidiots]

Sounds are WEIRD

Sounds are SCARY

Brain is SCREAMING at us to CHECK THE DOOR CHECK THE LOCK but we are warm and comfortable in bed and PARANOIA OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE PARANOIA

Fuck fuck

:(

Do not like

Bad sounds

[daphnix]

its crazy how spending money makes me feel alive again. any money that comes in comes out so quickly, i have this emotional NEED that blocks all rational thinking

[1introvertedsage]

We don't do compulsive behaviors because we lack willpower. We do them because it's the only way we know how to self soothe. Soothing is an instinctual behavior, not a moral one.

~Dr. Nicole Lepera~

[enbycarp]

A few years ago, I started having to give a "kiss" to every animal I saw. It's a mental kiss. So when I see someone walking a dog, I just say "kiss" in my head. (It actually started with me actually pursing my lips and doing a little kiss, but I was able to change to the mental kiss when I got worried people would see me doing that).

This expanded, so that whenever I saw a picture of an animal, I had to give a kiss. Then even drawings of animals (not all drawings. They have to be realistic enough to trigger my kiss response). Now whenever I'm scrolling through tumblr, I'm constantly giving mental kisses to all the critters I see.

I don't know what happens if I don't give an animal a kiss. I've tried to not do it, but after a few seconds it stresses me out so bad that I always give a kiss in the end.

Also, many years ago, I was interested in Buddhism, and was going to a Buddhist temple for a while. I learned to chant Amitabha Buddha's name. At some point, I started saying his name three times when anything bad was happening. I don't know how I came up with three times, since I think you're supposed to say it at least ten times. I was the only white person at the temple I went to, and there as a bit of a language barrier (services were in Chinese), so my learning curve there was steep. But like, when someone was sick or in a bad place, I'd chant the Buddha's name. And then when I would hear about someone dying or suffering I'd have to chant it. If I think a bad thought about someone, then I have to chant it.

I'm not Buddhist. I explored that possibility and determined it wasn't for me. But I can't stop chanting the Buddha's name. I don't know what happens if I do stop, but I can only imagine it's bad.

When I see a poster for a lost pet, I now have to give it a mental kiss, and chant the Buddha's name. When the poster is in my neighborhood, and I see it every day while walking my dog, I have to give a mental kiss and chant the Buddha's name for it every day.

Sometimes, it gets tiring. Sometimes, I chant the Buddha's name for someone in my family, and then I have to chant for everyone in my family, and all the pets.

Sometimes, I see a picture of a dozen wolves or something, and I have to give everybody a kiss (though I've started being able to satisfy the urge by giving one "broad kiss" to the whole group). Scrolling reddit's popular page is an exercise in compulsive actions, because every other post is either an animal, or a story about someone dying or suffering.

But I can never stop. I don't know what happens if I stop, but it's certainly bad. I don't know how the world functioned before I started doing these things.

PS: I have been going to therapy and been on meds for anxiety for years. I just thought I'd share.

[parulprasad]

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[favorhealthcareservicesllc]

Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) is often misunderstood as a condition solely characterized by an irrational fear of dirt or germs. However, the reality is far more complex. OCD encompasses a wide range of intrusive thoughts and compulsive behaviors that significantly impact an individual’s daily life. Let’s delve deeper into this misunderstood mental health condition.

[traumagenica]

*through gritted teeth* regression is fine. it is a natural part of the healing process, which is not linear nor instant. it's okay that my tooth brushing compulsions are coming back- my dentist will be so proud of me! this is a good thing. this is not a bad thing. we can cope with this. this is fine.

[al-emadi22]

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[thecouncilofidiots]

What term for when compulsion make continue read distressing thing because moral say have to or be not good person? /genq

Not in a hurt self by doing self-hurt thing, but a have to do thing even though it hurt because otherwise Bad...

Think Council have this? Not know for sure, Mouse is experience for first time and no have access to know from other headmate

[the2amrevolution]

Tumblr triggers my compulsive organization/arranging behaviors when I queue and tag things, and I lose hours every day I queue stuff. For zero reason. No one cares. Theres zero consequences. The only way I can think to avoid that is to either completely stop tagging or only tag things I have quick tags for and to stay off the queue page on desktop, only hitting shuffle on mobile.

Because when I'm not compulsively organizing on tumblr I get other things I want to do done.

[tomato-puppy]

one of my definitely neurodivergent traits is that i have a compulsion to reinforce cardboard boxes for storage purposes.

I mean this in itself is ONLY possible because I tend to keep most cardboard boxes that come into my possession. (I was about to take a pic of the stack of random boxes I have here but realized that I'd have to individually blur out a bunch of shipping labels that have my address on them) And like, most of them do end up being useful in some way, mostly as I go through all the junk I've accumulated over the years and sort things into piles (yes I also enjoy sorting objects into piles according to various attributes....)

but it does beyond simply reusing.. i often can't help myself but spend a few hours actually repairing some really old ones that got worn out and tore, reinforcing the spots with weakness or add structural integrity by adding cardboard. lots of complicated cutting and trimming. lots of packing tape. i buy packing tape in packs of at least 5-6.

actually organizing and sorting objects into that small box might end up being a 1+ hour job lmao 🤣😂

[mlleshopping]

Social Media: ‘Everything You Do Is Wrong’ — HeartyPsych

Social Media: ‘Everything You Do Is Wrong’ — HeartyPsych

Source link: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/thinking-about-kids/202212/social-media-everything-you-do-is-wrong Anxiety and defying common sense feed clicks. “Throwing balls to your dog teaches obsessive behaviors and will cause permanent damage to their bones and joints.” That was the last straw. Loki, my pandemic pup, is involved in a lot of dog sports. He is a natural at FastCAT…

[ash-says]

If it kept you alive then don't regret it.

What's important is surviving. Being alive . By whatever means possible.

Forgive yourself for all those decisions you made, you think were wrong and do the right thing now.

You are here. You are alive. It's all that matters. I am proud of you.