#cocsa vent
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Shoutout to everyone whose abuser(s) were never punished.
Shoutout to everyone whose abuser is living a normal life.
Shoutout to everyone whose allegations were immediately dismissed.
Shoutout to everyone reported their abuser to the police and nothing happened.
Shoutout to everyone whose abuser was able to get out of significant legal punishment.
Shoutout to everyone whose abuser is generally seen as a good person.
Shoutout to everyone whose abuser is a “pillar of the community.”
Shoutout to everyone whose abuser has lied about you.
Shoutout to everyone whose abuser has framed them.
Shoutout to everyone whose abuser threatened them into silence.
Shoutout to everyone whose abuser discouraged them from reporting.
Shoutout to everyone who lost friends after reporting and or exposing their abuser.
Shoutout to everyone who lost family after reporting and or exposing their abuser.
Shoutout to everyone who received backlash for reporting and or exposing their abuser.
Shoutout to everyone who has created a rift in their family or friends by reporting or exposing their abuser.
Shoutout to everyone who is terrified to tell anyone about their abuser.
Shoutout to everyone who never had the opportunity to talk about their abuser.
Shoutout to everyone who feels like talking about their abuser is worthless.
Shoutout to everyone whose case was dismissed by the court.
Shoutout to everyone who faced backlash after their abuser was put in jail.
Shoutout to everyone who faced backlash for testifying against their abuser.
Shoutout to everyone who still has yet to be believed that they were abused.
Shoutout to everyone who knows their abuser will never be punished.
Shoutout to everyone who knows their abuser will never face backlash.
Shoutout to everyone who knows their story will be dismissed by loved ones.
Shoutout to everyone who spoke out about their abuser, but wasn’t believed until something happened to someone else.
Shoutout to everyone who spoke out about their abuser and wasn’t believed until they seriously harmed you.
Shoutout to everyone who has been mocked for trying to speak out about their abuser.
Shoutout to everyone who has faced social repercussions for speaking out or exposing their abuser.
Shoutout to everyone who has suffered financially for speaking out or exposing their abuser.
Shoutout to everyone whose abuser has admitted guilt, but never faced justice.
Shoutout to everyone who knows they were abused and are punished for it.
#mental health#positivity#self care#mental illness#self help#recovery#actuallytraumatized#mommy issues#daddy issues#childhood trauma#bpd#traumacore#trauma#self h@rm#child abuse#cocsa vent#csa vent#csa survivor#abuse survivor#ventcore#vent art#thinspø#tw ana bløg#low cal restriction#self mutalition#depressing shit#neurodivergent#sad thoughts#sa survivor#tw self hate
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will this horrible feeling ever pass?
#bpd feels#bpd blog#bpd thoughts#bpd#bpd vent#bpd safe#borderline problems#actually borderline#borderline life#borderline blog#actually neurodiverse#actually autistic#neurospicy#cluster b safe#cocsa vent#vent post#vent#tw depressing thoughts#cocsa survivor#sa survivor#spilled thoughts#spilled words#spilled ink#spilled feelings#bpd emotions#word post#sleeplessv0id
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having a complicated relationship with sex/sexual things after sa is so weird because like . it'll be 1 am and ill be switching through apps and ill be thirsting over a character and then ill open tumblr and i remember everything bad shes ever done to me
#cw vent#sa survivor#sa vent#sa victim#vent blog#vent post#tw vent#vent#sa trauma#cocsa survivor#cw cocsa#cocsa vent#cocsa victim#tw sa mention#tw sa#sa recovery#tw csa#cw csa#csa vent#csa victim#actually traumatized
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milk and honey - rupi kaur.
#✧ for the loss of innocence and childish joy.#vent#cocsa survivor#cocsa vent#cocsa victim#csa survivor#sa survivor#sad writing#sa awareness#vent art#sa vent
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“But he was just a child”
So was I
And I’m suffering and he’s not
#cw cocsa#cocsa victim#cocsa vent#cocsa survivor#tw cocsa#csa vent#tw csa implied#csa survivor#tw csa#actually mentally ill#actually ptsd#ptsd vent#personal vent#traumatic experience#actuallytraumatized#mental health#repressed memories
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yeah, i hate everything that my abusers did. but what disgusts and angers me more than anything that they did, is the fact that they're living their best lives, with no consequences. meanwhile, i'm still trying to fucking repair the life that they ruined for me
#actuallytraumatized#traumacore#trauma vent#ventcore#actually traumatized#actuallybpd#bpd#bpd vent#angercore#anger vent#tw child abuse#csa vent#tw cocsa#csa victim#tw csa#cocsa vent#cocsa victim#sa vent#sa victim
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It’s always “I’m sure she didn’t mean anything by it” and never “I’m sorry that happened to you”
#she was 10 and I was 6#she told her stepmother what she did#not out of guilt though. she was proud#her stepmother did nothing. just said she didn’t care#I am angry#tw cocsa#cocsa survivor#cocsa vent#sa survivor#sa awareness
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Trauma art about how the Menendez trail affected me. Lyrics from Lingua Ignota and Ethel Cain
#survivor#jose menendez#free the menendez brothers#monsters: the lyle and erik menendez story#menendez brothers#documentary#monsters#freeerikmenendez#freelylemenendez#erik and lyle menendez#trauma#childhood trauma#ptsd#complex ptsd#trauma recovery#trauma survivor#sa#tw cocsa#cocsa survivor#cocsa victim#cocsa vent#cw cocsa#ventcore#vent post#personal vent#vent#venting#vent blog#tw vent#vent art
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maybe it was all my fault that i was raped cause she was literally my age and we were just kids. i didn’t want her to do it but i didn’t say no so i was probably asking for it anyway. i shouldn’t have let her sleep in my bed i should’ve told her to get out of my room but i couldn’t. why didn’t i just say no. i should’ve told her i didn’t want her filthy fingers in my vagina but i didn’t and i still feel her fingers all these years later. i tried to speak and nobody believed me cause we were just kids.
“she was only 10!! a 10 year old can’t rape someone!!”
then how come she scissored me and fingered me and fucked me raw when i was literally just a child? who cares if she didn’t know any better she still did it. she penetrated me with her filthy fingers and i wanna die now and i can’t believe i let her. all i think about is sex now. just sex sex sex sex sex all i wanna do is touch myself and i think of her and i think of her disgusting voice and when im finished i can’t even look at myself in the mirror cause im such a fat filthy whore. i hate myself and i hate everyone cause nobody will believe me. i feel so disgusting i hate her so much she was my stepsister why would she abuse me like that when i was just a little girl? i wanna stop thinking about sex so bad i wanna stop i feel so disgusting and filthy. please god let me stop hypersexual please stop!!
someone please help me
#cocsa vent#vent poetry#personal vent#tw s3lf harm#sa poem#tw csa#im hurtin#please#please help#i should kms#coquette#lana del rey#girlblogger#gaslight gatekeep girlboss#female hysteria#girlblogging#lizzy grant#female manipulator#this is what makes us girls#femcel#i wanna kms
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i wish i could remember how many times it happened.
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Does it even count
Sure I spend nights crying over it, without being able to breathe properly
But does what they did to me actually count
Can I really call myself a victim
Sure, there isn't a hierarchy of victims, but I feel like I went through so little to call myself that
Sure I remember wanting them to stop, being terrified, paralyzed, of actually asking them
But they didn't do much
Aren't I just overreating, I wonder
It's been years I've been wondering
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Reminders this Sexual Assault Awareness Month that your assault(s) are valid even if:
Your loved ones don’t believe you
Your assaulter was your lover/partner
You “didn’t fight back”
You were intoxicated
You originally consented
You had consensual sex with them in the past
You waited to speak out
You’ve never spoken out
You didn’t realize it was assault until later in life
You didn’t speak out until later in life
You didn’t go to police
You still haven’t told anyone
You were a child
You were a teenager
You were an adult
You both were children
You were wearing “provocative” clothes
You flirted with them
You pretended to like it
Penetration wasn’t involved
You “gave up” on fighting
You’re scared to tell someone
You can’t talk about it
You can talk about it, but don’t want to
The police didn’t believe you
Your “friends” didn’t/don’t believe you
You still had consensual sex with them after it happened
You never developed any mental illness/trauma-related symptoms from it
The person(s) stopped
The person(s) apologized
You thought it was consensual at the time
No one else was assaulted by them
You initiated the encounter
You orgasmed
You showed signs of arousal
You never were given an apology
Your assaulter refuses to say it was assault
Your assaulter was a family member
Your assaulter was a friend
You feel like it was your fault
You feel like you could’ve stopped it
You’re a girl
You’re a boy
You’re trans
You’re nonbinary, gender-fluid, etc.
You were bigger than them
You were stronger than them
If it was “only” once
If it happened multiple times
If you didn’t act on a bad feeling before the assault happened
If you could have escaped
If speaking out will “ruin their life”
If “it was just a mistake”
If you were warned
If it was an affair
If they were never punished
If they were punished, but it doesn’t feel like enough
There is no right or wrong way to be assaulted. There is no real or fake way to be assaulted. There is no type of assault that “isn’t that bad.” There is no assault that is your fault. You didn’t deserve it. It wasn’t okay. I believe you. I believe in you.
#mental health#positivity#mental illness#self care#self help#shblr#ed but not sheeran#baby cvts#mentally fucked#mentally ill#tw self destruction#cocsa survivor#cocsa vent#bpd#mental health awareness#self h@rm#childhood trauma#consent#trauma#ana stuff#recovery#ed recovery#eating disorder recovery#body positivity#pro recovery#actually cptsd#actuallytraumatized#male ed#ana trigger#skinnni
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sometimes the distractions fail, and I am forced to confront the fact that I am still as sick as I've always been.
#bpd blog#bpd rage#actually bpd#bpd vent#borderline problems#borderline blog#borderline culture is#actually borderline#cluster b safe#bpd#tw self destruction#cw cocsa#cocsa vent#cocsa victim#complex ptsd#c ptsd#sa survivor#vent post#bpd relatable#bpd issues#autistic spectrum#sleeplessv0id
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I am sitting down in the shower It is this dirty type of clean That keeps me trapped in here for hours Still, I scrub and scrub until my body bleeds Convince myself I am coming clean Forget and ignore who I used to be That kid is never coming back
Bathtub - The Front Bottoms.
#✧ for the loss of innocence and childish joy.#✧ an ode to suffering#cocsa survivor#sa survivor#csa survivor#sa awareness#cocsa vent#sa vent#cocsa victim#sa victim#sad writing#vent
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I hate that I need validation for my trauma
Like I didn’t have a mental breakdown so bad yesterday over my flashbacks my mom called the hospital
And yet I still question if I’m being to dramatic was it really that deep? Was it really sa? I don’t even remember enough
#cocsa vent#cocsa survivor#cocsa victim#cw cocsa#actually ptsd#childhood ptsd#actually traumatized#actually mentally ill#tw cocsa#trauma healing#traumatic childhood#traumatic experience#post traumatic stress disorder#living with ptsd#ptsd#ptsd vent#personal vent#csa vent#csa survivor
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