#batman don't care

[snakeredbirdbatkatana]

So I know how we have a lot of Jason and Dick or even Alfred drugging Tim in fics.

I have never liked that what so ever.

Like I don't think we as fandom really think about it.

I want you to imagine your brother or grandfather adjacent person handing you a drink that without thinking you take. You drink it and then nothing your are just out for over twelve hours.

You don't know what happened, you will never know what happened in that time frame all because you weren't sleeping the amount they wanted you to.

Also these are trained vigilante's who have more than likely witnessed rape cases with drugs who have had to help someone who was roofed home why in the fuck would you do that to one of yours.

Now another aspect why in the fuck would Jason Todd no drugs to children, and Dick Grayson who has had his bodily autonomy taken from him do this to their brother.

Alfred ok maybe he's done it to Bruce so many times he just doesn't think.

But look me in the fucking eyes and tell me they wouldn't lose their actual fucking shit if that was done to Damian or Tim.

They wouldn't be cool with it, they wouldn't laugh at it.

Imagine Jason and Dick chilling in the cave it's been a long patrol about to head to bed when they see Alfred come down and hand Tim coffee an energy drink pick your poison. They watch as Tim looks at Alfred before shoving it away.

"Master Tim it would be beneficial to your health if you drink your beverage."

"Sorry but I don't feel like being drugged tonight."

Dick wouldn't even blink before shattering the mug. Jason would be screaming at Alfred.

They would never trust that man again, the man who fed and taught them someone who had their backs.

Betrayed everything it doesn't matter the reason.

Or what if Tim drank it.

He starts slurring his words, starts to almost fall over calling for Jason or Dick.

"It was Drugged."

Falling unconscious into Jason's arms.

Jason who is screaming for help they don't know what it was they assume someone poisoned him not their sweet grandpa Alfred. The whole family rushing Dick practically crying only for Alfred to not blink tell them to get him bed as if it's normal.

In conclusion Dick Grayson and Jason Todd would not be the the spokesmen for drugging your baby brother and then carrying him to bed. They would not tamper with Tim or Damian's food. They would not ok with little brothers falling out of chairs or losing time not knowing what happened. All because they weren't following someone else's rules.

Well Tim hasn't slept in twenty four hours oh ok then let's drug him without his consent because I want him to go to bed.

That's some Arkham level bullshit.



[batfamhastwitter]

Part 19! Behold, Tim and Kon's first forays into babysitting! for people in charge of saving the world every other weekend they were way too unprepared for taking care of Lian lol

Prev ~ Beginning ~ Next

[bet-on-me-13]

Bruce Wayne was never Batman.

So! The night that Bruce Wayne's parents got shot, he developed an Unbreakable Resolve. He needed to get rid of the Crime that had taken his Parents away from him, no matter what.

But that night, he also developed a deep-seated fear of Death. He was face to face with his own Demise and instead of dying himself he saw his Parents die instead. He was Terrified of ending up like them.

But he still needed to stop Crime. He couldn't just let criminals go unpunished, and while he was still using his wealth to try and prevent it before it began, he knew there needed to be something to stop crime After it had been committed. And the Cops were useless on that Front.

He eventually found a solution while looking through his Parents Family Heirlooms.

Ancient Books dating back to the founding of Gotham and even before then, telling of a Creature from another world who his Ancestors had helped in the Past. A Being of Fear and Shadow, who owed a debt to the Wayne Family. He needed that Being. A Monster of Shadows and Fear was exactly the answer to scaring criminals away from committing crimes and punishing those who did.

But he needed to find the Being from another world first.

So he left home, traveling across the Globe training with the best Magicians and Demonologists in the world in search of the Monster who owed his Family a Debt. His travels took him far, from the streets of LA where he met a man named Zatara, to the Snowy Mountains of Nanda Parbat where he learned of the Lazarus Pits and the Demon's that came out of them.

While studying the Lazarus Pits, he was trained by the organization who guarded them. They despised Weakness, and while their leader was in awe of his Intelect he was less impressed by his body's conditioning. If he was to study the Lazarus Pits, he would first have to earn the Right in Combat.

He eventually managed to pass their Tests and eventually left them, having handed over a Copy of his research as the price for being allowed to Study the Pits.

Years later, he finally returned to Gotham, fully equipped to Summon the Being that owed him a Debt.

Bruce drew up the Summoning Circle as perfectly as he possibly could, he had one shot at it.

A drop of his blood and a splash of Lazarus Water later, and the Circle began to glow an ominous Green. Slowing, a shifting shadow began to emerge from the Circle, at first only a mass of writhing darkness before their form Solidified.

The Books he had found on the Spirit said that it would take the form of the Summoners Greatest Fear, which just so happened to be Bats for Bruce. The Form that the Spirit chose reflected that, with large Dark Wings falling over their form as if they were a Cape, and horns looking like the Ears of a Bat. From the Darkness, two glowing eyes appeared.

"Spirit, hear me. My name if Bruce Wayne, and I am calling in the Debt owed to my Family centuries ago. My City is plagued with crime and malice, rotting from its Core. My efforts to prevent Crime from the side of the Light have been in vain, Crime persists despite my efforts. In order for my vision to be fulfilled, the Criminals of this City must have their hearts pierced by Fear. Fear of Retribution. Fear of Consequences. Fear of Vengeance."

Thoughout bis Speech, the Shadowed Figure stayed silent.

"That is why I have called you here. I want you to stalk these streets, punish the criminals of this City and strike fear into their hearts from the shadows, so that they know to stay in the light. I don't want you to Kill them, never kill them. Let them live with that fear in their Hearts until their final days."

After he finished his speech, the Figure finally spoke.

"Your Quest is an Honorable one. You seek the betterment of your people's, and are unafraid to resort to drastic measures to achieve that goal. It reminds me of my Liege's resolve." It Spoke, it's voice low and rumbling. "Very Well. From this day forth, I shall protect your City from the Darkness in its own Heart. I shall be your Dark Knight."

...

Had this idea out of nowhere and needed to write it down. In this AU, Bruce still wants to protect his City from crime, but is understandably traumatized from seeing the Deaths of his Parents. He has a deep-seated fear of Dying, so he chooses to forgo fighting crime himself.

Instead, he finds out about a Spirit that his Ancestors helped long ago, and decides that the most logical next step out be to Summon a Demon to protect his City. Instead of training his Body for a decade to become Batman, he trains his Mind and Studies as much about Magic and Demon's as Possible.

He still knows how to fight because he trained with the League. He approached them with an offer to study the Lazarus Pits and give them his findings, and they accepted. But Ra's didn't want a weakling on his Base so he also required Bruce to train his body. He saw his potential for combat, and was so disappointed that Bruce had chosen a different path. He could have been Great!

Bruce still has a thing with Talia that produces Damian, he is still a point of interest from Ra's since he is insanely smart and has huge potential, and he knows how to fight pretty well. Albeit not as well as in Canon.

Bruce becomes the Benefactor/Guy in the Chair for Fright Knight (who is the one he summoned if you couldn't tell), who looks like a "Bat Man" because of Bruce's fear of Bats. Fright Knight agreed to this because 1.) He had a debt to pay, 2.) Bruce reminded him of Danny, and 3.) He respected Bruce's ballsyness to Summon a demon and command it to protect people.

Bruce still adopts his Kids, but there are some changes.

Dick is adamant about fighting Crime, and eventually Bruce is forced to let him go on patrol with Fright Knight, who has started going by Batman. Thankfully Frighty managed to give him some blessings so he had minor powers and would be safer.

Jason is mostly the same, and he is so excited that Robin actually IS Magical. When he dies, Fright Knight, who had gotten attached to their Family, goes into the Zone to search for him. He is unsuccessful unfortunately.

Tim is kind of funny. He figured out that Dick was Robin, and Jason was the 2nd Robi , but assumed that Bruce was Batman. When he approached Bruce about becoming Robin so he would stop going down his violent Cycle, Bruce Redirected him to talk to Fright Knight, who was not taking his failure to find Jason well.

Damien grew up knowing that his Father was a Genius, and the Master of the Batman, which gave him a bit of an Ego. At first he thought of Fright Knight as a Servant, and tried to command him like he did with Alfred. Frighty corrected him quickly enough.

Any more ideas for this AU? I have so many, but I think I need to stop for now.

[lambsouvlaki]

Prompt: AU where Jason Todd didn't get taken in by Bruce, because he actually succeeded in stealing the batmobile's tires. He sold them to the local mechanic, who was so scared for him (the tires are pretty distinctive) that he kinda-adopted Jason himself to protect him from any fall out.

Batman still figures out who stole his tires and confronts Jason, who refuses to be cowed. Bruce is just as amused and impressed at this twelve year old's gumption.

Cut to ten years later. Jason now runs the Alley's workshop, and is Batman's emergency mechanic when the car breaks down in the city.

On your average tuesday night Killer Croc shreds the batmobile's tires and Batman skids into the shop, with fucked up rims and shredded rubber going everywhere, and a twenty two year old Jason in coveralls and smudged engine oil is just like 'again, old man?'

[mikakuna]

nothing would be funnier than the bats universe-hopping and finding all these different versions of jason, and shoving in their jason's face that these alternate jasons would not agree with his fatal treatment of criminals (because some of them look straight up happy and have great relationships with bruce + the others).

but then to everybody's surprise, each jason has their own variation of their jason's methods. they literally all have similar opinions, even the ones who didn't die at the joker's hands. some were robin and some were never robin, some were adopted by bruce and others weren't, some lived worse lives than their jason and others lived much better lives-- but they all became their own version of red hood either way.

and jason is just absolutely having the best time looking at the bats' disappointed faces

[gnomewithalaptop]

Rereading the Our Worlds at War tie-in again and God I miss their friendship every day

[violent138]

Diana, looking into the camera as Bruce and Clark have yet another couples' argument in front of the entire JLA.

[the-batblog]

This is probably a hot take but I don't think anybody actually cares who Batman is outside of the GCPD and conspiracy theorists.

When Batman first shows up he's a friggen poltergeist. He's a cryptid. For a second there maybe people thought he was just a creepypasta.

Then when people start to think… actually it kinda seems like he's a guy…? Like, he's a real…? Person…???

Then the GCPD is like, 'Okay, well, then he's breaking laws.'

But your average schmo is like, 'And? Yeah he's a guy; he gave me fifty bucks to get home last night. Right after he saved me from an acid piranha pit.'

But the thing is, Bats has his own personality. He's a whole person as the mask. People don't ask who Superman's secret identity is because, as far as they're concerned, Superman is just Superman, and when they can't see him, it's because he went home. It would be the same with Batman. They probably think he sleeps or hangs upside-down all day.

I think Gothamites like him as Just Batman; he's the city's pet monster, and they like it that way.

I think we get super caught up in the, "Batman's secret identity might be revealed! 😱" because Batman's secret identity is famous. But if someone unmasked Clark or Barry or Hal it would be like

"…I have no idea who this is."

And they expect the same of Batman.

GCPD wants to know so they can arrest him, conspiracy theorists want to know because they wanna know where he fits into the machine, gossip columnists want to know so they can get catch some drama, and real-person fanfic authors wanna know so they can accurately describe him when he takes his mask off to kiss Bruce Wayne.

[riddler-enthusiast]

[littlefankingdom]

When Jason shots Scarecrow and free Bruce in Arkham Knight, he already has a red bat painted on his militia fit, WHICH MEANS, after being defeated by Batman, he went around Gotham looking for red paint to mark himself as one of the bats. This boy. He wanted Bruce to look at him in the eyes when he died, but the moment they do look at each other in the eyes for more than a couple of seconds, Jason folded and went back to being an ally of Batman. The months/year of torture did not stand a chance to having his dad calling him Robin and asking him to come home. And I think Jason knew that the moment he revealed himself and saw Bruce's reaction, because during their fight, Jason keeps trying to keep his distance, doesn't look at Bruce for long and refuses to listen to him. He thought it was going to be easy, but the moment he was facing his dad and saw the emotions on his face, he started losing determination in his vengeance.

But also, Bruce not being able to punch the Knight because he can see Jason's face. He is looking in the eyes of his son and he cannot punch his son!

[adripakoffee]

They don't really think about Alfred's aging. Well, it's impossible to miss, but they all push it to the back of their minds. Of course, Alfred doesn't remind them. It's his job as a butler (and as a grandfather) to make sure the Waynes are comfortable and happy. So he doesn't tell them when he gets a hearing aid. And they don't notice at first, or rather most of them don't.

Tim and Bruce, in their ever-paranoid states, at first think Alfred is either wearing a wire or forgot to take off his comm. When they realize it's a hearing aid they don't say anything but they do start treating him with more care. They usually stay to the side of his bad ear when out in public, just in case he misses something from that direction that they could intercept. Tim starts allocating a lot of funds in WE to research into hearing loss and accessibility for the hard of hearing. Bruce almost cries (internally of course) whenever Alfred misses something he says. He doesn't want to think about it.

Duke and Cass notice next. Duke treats him a little differently. He wasn't 100% comfortable with having a butler in the first place, but now he doesn't let Alfred do anything for him. Apart from cooking. He'll always let Alfred cook. Cass doesn't treat him any differently. He still acts as if he's as capable as he's ever been because he is. Alfred could still snipe you with a rifle from half a city away if he needed so she doesn't worry.

Damian notices next and tells himself he simply doesn't care. His grandfather is at least a few hundred years older than Alfred and much more capable. Sure, he's also dipping himself in the Lazurus pit as his daily bath, but Alfred can handle himself without that boost. He pretends it doesn't bother him when Alfred needs him to repeat something. And how he looks at their family with a bit too much nostalgia. He pretends it doesn't bother him when Alfred talks about things as if he'll be gone someday. He won't be.

Dick and Jason notice last and freak out. Because oh my God, oh my God, Alfred's actually getting old. Dick spends more time at the manor and tries to spend as much time with Alfred as possible. He coodinates family outings with Alfred and makes sure everyone attends. He invites Selina half the time too, because God forbid Alfred gets too old without seeing Bruce in a happy stable relationship. Jason goes to the cave every time he gets injured, even if it's something minor just so Alfred can fix him up. He pretends like he needs Alfred more than ever and will stick next to him for about a week before thinking he's being a bother and dissapearing for a while. Then he comes back and does it again.

[erinwantstowrite]

Would you mind elaborating on what you mean by having to edit Stephs relationship with the bats in the fic?

before i read more about her character i assumed she had a more sibling relationship to the Bats and her mentorship with Bruce was different/more parental. i even had one of them refer to her as a sister or vice versa? but i know better now and went back and changed it. though she does comment that dick is like a brother to her i see it more as being good friends with your friend's/ex's/new partner's sibling, if that makes sense. i made a post a while back to clear up the miscommunication with the change but it has been a while

[thevoidstaredback]

How To Balance Your Daytime and Nighttime Activities So That You Don't Burn Yourself Out More Than You Already Have

Batman has an insane patrol schedule. Danny knew this, somewhere in the back of his mind, but it was only just settling in for him.

"You're gonna be dead tired tomorrow," he warns Dick, "You were tired for only being out for two hours longer than your new normal, going from sunset to sunrise is gonna knock you out. I can't drive, Dick, so we'll be stuck in Gotham for another day if you pass out."

Dick patted his head with a smile. "I'll be fine. I'll vene bring ya back some Bat Burger, okay?"

Danny blinked. "Bat Burger?"

"You've- You've never had Bat Burger?" Louder, he called to Barbra and Tim who'd just come back from wherever the Cave entrance is with a comm for Danny, "Danny's never had Bat Burger!"

Barbra gasped dramatically. Tim clutched ay imaginary pearls. "You've never had Bat Burger?!"

"That sounds like an exclusively Gotham thing, and I am decidedly not from Gotham."

It was quiet for another moment as the three stared at him. Finally, Dick blinked. "Have you always been Midwestern?"

"As far as I know, why?"

His head tilted slightly to the left. "Your accent just seems..."

"Much more prevalent." Tim finished.

"Yeah, that."

“I don’t know what you guys are talking about. I’ve always talked like this.” A lie. He was hiding his accent from everyone so that tracking him down would be ever so slightly harder. Danny shrugged, “Right, Barbra?”

She shook her head. "No, you leave me outta this. As far as I know, you've sounded like this the whole time and these two are only just picking up on the accent."

Good job, Danny. Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss your way into their hearts.

"Anyway," Barbra continued, holding her hand to Danny, "This is a comm. It'll keep you patched in until we come back up to the manor after patrol. If you get tired of us or when you sleep, just take it out and put it on your nightstand; we'll take it back down in the morning for you."

"Are you sure you don't wanna come to the Cave?" Tim asked.

Danny shook his head, the comm now sitting in his left ear. "Mister Wayne already hates me, I'm not gonna go into his space. Besides, I'm already intruding as it is."

"I just don't want you to be bored."

"It's alright, I'm sure I'll find something to occupy myself with while you guys are out. And, isn't the whole point of me being on comms so that you guys can talk to me?"

"You're right," Dick agreed, "We'll see ya when we get back."

"Alright."

Occupy himself with? Yeah, he's going back to Bludhaven. Another problem he just realized, though: How is Bat Tech going to react to/around Phantom? Danny figures he has about two minutes to figure it out or he's gonna have to bench himself for the night.

There was no one around, so he ducked into the nearest room to transform. It was a quick lightshow, as always, but not enough to draw attention of anyone passing by.

Except Alfred. Alfred probably knows.

Alfred won't tell Bruce, right?

Right?

Probably not.

Hopefully.

Focusing on the comm revealed no static, though there was no sound either. Was someone trying to talk to him already? Hopefully not. That'd be upsetting.

There was a soft crackle before: "Danny, can you hear us?"

Phantom allowed a small smile of victory. "Yeah, loud and clear, Barbra."

"Call me Batgirl right now, okay? Tim's Robin, and, as you know, Dick's Nightwing. And, if you really need him, Bruce is Batman."

"Got it."

"We don't use real names on comms," Robin said, "Do you have something we could call you?"

That's probably a fish for what his hero name used to be. All three of them - Tim, at the very least - were hung up on the 'not anymore' of his denial and it really showed. He could make it easy and tell them to call him Phantom, but he really does not want them finding out his childhood right now. So, "Tutelary."

"'Tutelary'?" Nightwing asked.

"It's Greek," Batgirl said, "Tutelaries are deities or patrons of protection."

"Aw, that's cute," Robin cooed teasingly, "But you aren't doing much protecting from the Manor."

Phantom - is he really ready to give up that name? - blushed green, "Shut up. Protection Spirits are a big deal where I'm from!" Yeah, meaning most people don't actually think they're protecting them, but who really cares about technicalities?

"And that would be..?" Batman spoke up, his voice coming out much more 'gargle glass' over the comms than was probably intended.

Phantom smirked. "The Midwest." Limits options, but not specifically but he figured he could throw them a bone. Though, that's the only one he's giving Mister Wayne.

Speaking of, "I'll try not to be a distraction, Mister Batman sir, but I won't make any promises."

Nightwing, Batgirl and Robin were all sniggering. Batman was quiet for no more than a few seconds. "Stop getting distracted; We're leaving."

"Yes, sir!"

Phantom listened closely, focusing on the Cave below the Manor. Batman and Robin had gotten into some kind of assault vehicle-race car mix and were driving out into Gotham Proper quickly. Nightwing and Batgirl were both on motorcycles, leaving out a different way but just as quickly.

"Have fun out there, you guys."

Nightwing laughed, "We'll bring ya back some Bat Burger."

Part 15 Part 17

Real quick, before you move on, a quick Thank You to @bianca-hooks123 for the idea for Danny's name Tutelary. I hadn't even thought of using that until it was suggested, so thanks <3

[bruciemilf]

One of my biggest pet peeves is the justice league being labelled as " The Avengers of DC" and its like. No? The avengers are law enforcement. The Justice League are volunteers

[gothamite-rambler]

Lady Shiva: You dating anyone yet?

Cass stopped eating her cookies when hearing that question remaining silent for a few seconds.

Lady Shiva (strict mother tone): I want to know about your social life! You won't kill, but I'm still your mother.

Cass (shy): Right... I'll circle back to the dating thing. What else would you like to know?

Lady Shiva (stirring her tea with a stick cookie): Anything really. I learned you and that Red Hood man team up to fight crime, but you've been continuing to work with the blonde girl?

Cass: Yes.

Lady Shiva: And the skinny one?

Cass: Skinny- Oh you're referring to Red Robin. Yes, he's a good teammate and brother.

Lady Shiva: What? The rich guy adopted him too?

Cass (holding up her hand with five finger spread out): He has five kids, including me.

Lady Shiva (mystified): The Batman... Has five kids? The Robins are his actual children?

Cass (smirking): Yes... How did you think he had four interchangeable boys? That they were working for him?

Lady Shiva: Not going to lie, yes. I was with David and men make me sick. I can't with men!

Cass: Don't make me agree with you right now.

Lady Shiva: You share my DNA. Well, is this Bat-man a good parent at least?

Cass (sweetly): He is. He really is.

Lady Shiva rolled her eyes with a small smile.

Lady Shiva: I don't care for his code, his suit, his voice, but if you're happy... Then I won't kill him.

Cass: I'd break every bone in your body if you tried, but thank you.

[geeky-nightphilosopher]

🦇Batfamily🦇

Damian: *needing help on something so he's in the batcave* Are you doing anything?

Tim: *At the batcomputer* No, don't you know that I'm just here to look pretty?

Damian: Well, your doing a good job of that.

Bruce, Dick, Cass, Jason, Steph, and Duke: *blue screen*