#batman asexual

[beingaroace]

I think asexual Batman would make more sense. Pretending to be playboy, going on dates without having interest in any girl because that's what billionaire guys are supposed to be! But in real, he's very Asexual!

[arguablysomaya]

i personally believe that dick knows all of the lgbtq+ community memes better than anyone in his family despite the fact that he categorically refuses to come out so it's like

dick: omg ur asexual? do you like cake lololol

jason: ...how the fuck do you know about that

dick: more of a garlic bread guy then?

jason: if you're trying to kill me from cringe, believe me, I'll get you first

-

dick: it's getting cold out, gang, so dress warm. tim, no more bisexual cuffed jeans

tim: you can't call me out for that when you dress the EXACT SAME WAY, idiot

-

dick: the economy's getting bad. steph's gonna have to start dating men again soon

steph: LMFAO that's pretty funnyyyyyexceptit'sactuallytrueandalsohowdoyouknowaboutthat

[vodrae]

Asexual Jason Todd is actually the secret weapon of Batman.

Let me explain.

Every major female foes of the Bat used their sex appeal at one moment to distract the police, Arkham guards...

But, imagine Ivy increasing again and again and again the power of her pollen and Red Hood does not react. Maybe sneezing.

Circea trying to play whith his mind and

"Wtf are you doing ? Stop moving your hands like that."

Every teen heros getting caught lurking on Kori or Power Girl and he doesn't understand why those idiots can't start the meeting. Wtf does "My eyes are here" even mean.

Evil foreigner billionaire sending a spy to seduce the oldest boy in the family still in Gotham to steal informations on WayneTech and after a party of dancing and talking, with innuendos bigger than his arms, the dude takes back the girl in his plaza room to be sure she's safe and fall asleep on the floor.

Meanwhile the spy doesn't know if she lost her talents of if Jason has a really strong mind.

If Jason was Batman from the start, first encounter with catwoman, take 1 :

"What arrre you going to do, arrrest me ?

- Yes.

- Wait, what ?"

Jason going to college and always being invited to girls night when they're going to bars or nightclubs because they have a 6'6 werewolf with them to dissuaded the other guys and they feel secure because they can't recall one time he tried something that made them uncomfortable, or just something in fact.

Never hit on a girl, loves litterature, takes great care of his body...Jason Todd is the only gothamite unaware he's a gay icone.

[feartoxinjelloshot]

you KNOW theyre getting weird with it in there

[writingpoorly]

me: *aroace* how do I write a date?

[littlefankingdom]

I lied. Put your clothes back on. We're going to talk about how Batman was not meant to be "vengeance" but "compassion", and how his character has been twisted through the decades that now people thinks he is supposed to be vengeance, which harms his character.

(See how here, Batman becomes a figure of vengeance from grieving Robin? Batman being vengeance is when he is at his lowest, like when Jason died, but he isn't supposed to be vengeance most of the time. Also, this is Dick.)

(And Alfred explaining Bruce is motivated by compassion not revenge.)

[heybatterbats]

I’ve been seeing entirely too many posts about how ace-spec people aren’t really LGBTQ+ and don’t belong at Pride. And I got mad about it. So…*aces your Batfamily*

Yes, all of them. Every last one is now ace-spec in some way. They even named their dog Ace.

Bruce is sex-neutral biromantic demisexual, and came out by accident at age 24 to a random reporter who was not expecting it. This sparked a social media storm that was only halted by the much bigger social media storm of Bruce adopting Dick.

The Batman has been asked his sexuality before. Bruce replied- perfectly straight faced- that the Batman is an asexually reproductive entity and creates its Robins via mitosis. A third of Gotham, most of Metropolis, and several members of the Justice League still believe this.

Dick is sex-repulsed biromantic asexual, and is of the type to make the dirtiest jokes you’ve ever heard because sex is a joke to him. Came out in the form of an acrobatics performance he did at a pride parade, wearing a terrible Batman costume with a bi heart as the Batsymbol, an ace flag cape, and no pants. The audience was ecstatic. Bruce was mortified.

Nightwing has never said his sexuality, but anyone who claims he’s straight is quickly met with pictures of the Discowing suit and up to a dozen laughing emojis.

Jason is sex-repulsed aromantic asexual. He’s not as vocal about it as Dick is, but he does like it to be known. He’s the type to make garlic bread/cake/world domination jokes. And ESPECIALLY dragon jokes. He kinda tends to just insert it casually into conversation, he didn’t do anything crazy to come out. It’s just a fact about him.

Red Hood claims to be sexually attracted exclusively to guns. Bruce hates this joke.

Tim is the opposite of Bruce- he’s sex-positive bisexual demiromantic. One of the few Batkids to come out while in costume- he got a concussion on a case and blearily mumbled into Bruce’s hair that he’s “you but backwards” and completely confused Bruce. Tim is a little shy about his identity, but since dating Bernard he’s been more open about it.

Red Robin is out as bisexual, but hasn’t added demiromantic to that. Tim is worried people will piece his secret identity together, since Tim doesn’t realize that most normal people are not highly skilled detectives who can tell a person’s identity from a single acrobatics move.

At the moment, Damian just thinks he’s feeling the normal “ew cooties” that most children do. In the future he’ll realize that he’s sex-repulsed ace/aro, although he’ll refuse to use those terms in favor of broodily muttering “this bloodline dies with me.” Ra’s has an actual heart attack the first time Damian says this to his face and has to go into the Lazarus Pit to recover. Talia has never been more proud.

Barbara is sex-neutral, demiromantic and asexual. She’s more outspoken about it than most of the family, and runs social media pages about disability and the asexuality spectrum alike. Aphobes and ableists that make the mistake of leaving comments often mysteriously find that their most embarrassing search histories have been sent to their grandmother.

Cass is sex-repulsed ace/aro. Steph was the one to explain sexuality to her, and also made her an ace ring. Cass told Bruce first, then the rest of the family. She’s never come out publicly- Cass doesn’t like media attention being on her- but some sharp-eyed Gothamites who are looking can spot the black ring on Cassandra Cain-Wayne’s middle finger in a few paparazzi shots the papers got their hands on. (I have a fic about this!)

Black Bat has never been asked her sexuality, mainly because she’s absolutely terrifying and nobody can stammer out the words when faced with her.

Stephanie is sex-positive graysexual grayromantic, and absolutely not shy about it. She’s almost as good as Dick at making horrible, filthy jokes. Has punched a guy in the face for aphobia, does not regret it. Stephanie is out and proud and loud about it.

Spoiler/Batgirl III have both been seen wearing a rainbow flag as a cape too many times for anyone to assume they’re straight.

Duke is sex-neutral demisexual/demiromantic, and is probably the most open about it of the whole Batfamily. He’s fully out and so is Signal, and will inevitably show up at any daytime Pride event just to say hi. Gotham adores him, and he’s practically the ace-spec community’s mascot. Can and will use the entire rainbow spectrum of light to create various pride flags over Gotham whenever he feels like it, and has started taking flag/location requests. Once turned the Batsignal gay.

Harper is sex-positive bisexual aromantic, and where Stephanie is loud about it, Harper gets violent. She carries a souped-up taser and doesn’t hesitate to use it. Has knocked at least four homophobes/aphobes out cold not counting the ones she beat up in the Narrows. Bluebird is not only publicly out as bisexual but wears two out of three bisexual colors, and while it’s not come up publicly yet, she won’t hide that she’s aromantic either. Along with Signal and Spoiler, Bluebird is one of the vigilantes that’s known for being specifically good at handling LGBTQ+ issues. She wouldn’t have it any other way.

After being forcibly outed as gay and then bullied for it, Cullen is still in the closet about the fact that he’s asexual and sex-repulsed, too. The first person he told after Harper was Alfred. By now the whole family knows, but they’ve been careful to keep it away from the media until Cullen’s ready to come out himself.

Alfred is sex-neutral, aromantic, and pansexual, though he’s older than some of those terms and doesn’t often use them to describe himself. Bruce didn’t know Alfred was anything but straight until he was almost seventeen, to which Alfred replied- signature eyebrow raise at full height capacity- that he had a career in the theater, Master Bruce, and no one who does that can possibly be typical in matters of orientation or any other aspect of life.

The outfit might seem antithetical to this, but Selina is ace too! Specifically, she’s sex-positive, heteroromantic and demisexual. The leather outfit is primarily for distraction purposes rather than true sex appeal. When it comes to Bruce, however, Selina’s more than once described herself as “morosexual.” Bruce, bless him, still has no idea what that means.

There ya go. Ace-spec Batfam. Happy Pride to everyone but especially all you fellow ace-spec folks who absolutely, 100% belong there.

[the-one-and-only-ruination]

Fuck toxic romance, bring back toxic QPR’s.

codependent platonic soulmates with separation anxiety are where it’s at.

[logince]

your honor, I would like to present.............. him

[custardconsumer]

“STOP HEAD-CANNONING/MAKING VILLAINS ARO/ACE/AROACE ITS DEMONISING PEOPLE ON THE AROACE SPECTR-“

sshh…no…keeping doing it…i fw the villains they’re my kin. You mean bill cipher, the baddest b in the multiverse is aroace just like me? yes king welcome to the club happy to have you 😍

(not saying bill is aroace just saying at lot of ppl headcanon him as that and im using him as an example DONT YELL AT ME)

(but yes also making villains aroace cuz they’re “evil” and “cant feel love” is bad dont do that plz lol i was being silly)

[angelofpearls]

i don’t have crushes i have victims of the enormity of my desire and yearning

[arguablysomaya]

jason todd would be one of those asexuals who thinks they’re bi for the longest time because they’ve figured out they have the same amount of attraction to each gender, but they haven’t yet figured out that amount is zero 💀

[sqrumels]

Bruce Wayne being the biggest flirt and the biggest aroace guy to ever exist! He can flirt with everybody ( to get what he wants) because he feels the same amount of attraction to everybody

But as soon as the flirting starts to take a bit of a serious vibe, he runs, he dashes, and then one of the Batfam will find him curled up on the couch in his comfiest pajamas and chocolate icecream.

[tbalderdash-art-blog]

Headcanoned him as sex-repulsed purely out of spite (I saw the horrors in the Telltale Riddler tag)

[littlefankingdom]

At the speed I'm going, all the batfam is going to be asexual.

I read Batgirl (2000) and Cass shows being uncomfortable with being sexualized, something I relate to? She's asexual now.

I read great fics where Bruce was written as asexual? He's asexual now.

I see some good fanart where Jason is wearing a small ace pin, and when I point it out the artist is so excited about their "Asexual Jason Supremacy"? He's asexual now.

I read a post about Dick and how he used to be written uncomfortable with being sexualized and why op hc him as asexual? He's asexual now.

I read and see panels of Jean-Paul being uncomfortable with people (women) being into him or finding him attractive? He's asexual now.

Y'all cannot stop me.

[saicochomo]

There is something that just hits right about asexual Bruce Wayne. He has that play boy persona and tends to throw money at people to make sure that persona stays but he has never had sex, he has never felt the need or want to.

Bruce and Clark finnaly confess to each other and they are out on date that is getting a little steamy. They go back to Bruce's house and are making out. This Bruce is okay with this he has done plenty of times with Oliver, it was somthing he like doing with friends that he was particlly close with. But then Clark starts getting a little more frisky and Bruce just folds. He starts getting awkward and blushing like a school girl. He starts to interanly panic, should he be more turned on right now? Should he also be touching Clark? Sure he's gotten a little turned on sometimes but he has never felt the erge to finish the job or realy do anything about it.

Even when he had met Clark seeing um in the tight superman suit or just in his casual work attire that made him so damn cute. Bruce never really felt turned on enough to do something about it. This was part of the reason why it took him so long to come to terms that he did in fact love Clark. Socity had it ingraied to him that if he didn't want to have sex with the person he loves (Romanticly) Then he truely didn't love them.

Even now with Clarks hand travling down his chest plaming his half hard cock. He wasn't overly turned on. He loved every second of this but he loved it becuase he was with Clark and they where touching not because he was going to have sex with him. Bruce loved cuddles and just being close to Clark.

Clark picks up something is wrong with his boyfriend and asks Bruce if everything is ok. Bruce bashfully confesses his true thoughts and feelings about sex and being pshyical with Clark. To which Clark asks Bruce if he is asexual. Being the logical fuck he is Bruce then googles this and spends the next 2 hours resurching asexuality and states that yes he gets turned by sertant things but that is boiled down to just being the bodys reaction to situations. He himself feels no sexual needs, but loves being in contact with his boyfriend.

They talk more about this and come to terms that make out session and stolen kisses where always ok, but sex was something that Bruce needed to be told about in advance so he could prepare what he was willing to do with Clark that day because as much as Bruce doesn't care for sex Clark does, but he also loves his nerdy boyfriend and respects his wants and needs.

It ends up working as Bruce bottoming for Clark a few times a month. This takes Clark a bit to get use to because being the caring lover he is, he feels bad that Bruce doesn't cum or take phsycal pleasure from these moments. Bruce has to remind him that he may not psychally get off but he loves feeling close to Clark and seeing Clark happy is an enjoyable expreaince on its own.

Other times Bruce will use the fuck machine that he made with a mold of his cock and just let it hammer down on Clark, while he praises his boyfriend. This doesn't happen to much since Clark isn't a big bottom but he does enjoy it from time to time.

Sometimes Clark will masterbate with Bruce in the room. Wether Bruce is wokring, making out with Clark or intructing Clark how to get off. What ever it may be this is Bruce's prefered option. He doesn't have to prep himself and gets to watch Clark wither under his gaze.