#barbie crit

[anarmorofwords]

Okay anyone else seen Barbie and is let down because they expected a truly revolutionary satire dismantling parts of patriarchy such as the cult of women's beauty and high contradictory expectations in an actually meaningful and substantial way and not one short monologue? and instead got a mainstream feminism lackluster "inspirational" adventure movie that paints patriarchy in a really naive and simple way and also operates on very binary views and ultimately is not half as deep as it promised to be?

[kerryweaverlesbian]

How come in the barbie movie none of the women get to do any violence. It's what I keep coming back to when i think about this movie. Allen throws a punch. The Kens do a dance sequence battle but they do also battle. If you have fights in the movie then why aren't women doing them. They didn't need Allen to psychically fight the Kens at the gate, but they did, which makes it stand out.

That and the complete lack of lesbians were really weird non-choices in this movie.

[undead-knick-knack]

[thewhalelord]

Son of the Wind

[nyxofdemons]

like i can appreciate the consistency of blitz truly having EVERY bridge to his past burned down for better or worse and it makes sense that would include barbie wire but man i really wish we got SOMETHING more interesting with them literally anything at all

[honshew]

heaven's eyes

my dm recently changed keva's home country lore to being inspired by cappadocia, turkey and the middle east, and yesterday i got the sudden itch to rewatch one of my favorite movies prince of egypt, and then this happened

[imjustlaughingalong]

After watching the barbie movie...it was okay. I can't help but think it'd be better if it had more scenes like the beginning or the "I'm just ken" scenes, babies doing barbie things & having fun, like life in the dreamhouse

[dreamstar-moonlight]

Yeah FOR REAL.

I’ve had it with these "pjo tv" fans. If I see one more person defending that dumpster fire of a show with "it's a kids' show," I'm actually gonna scream. Since when did “for kids” become a synonym for “brainless rot”?Are y'all seriously so blind and deluded that you can't distinguish between quality content and a shameless cash grab? It's infuriating how one can stomach such a pathetic excuse for entertainment and have the audacity to defend it.

To everyone out here bending over backwards to defend this garbage just because your precious "Uncle Rick" is involved this time around—what’s with the hive mind? Need validation much? A desperate desire to fit in with the crowd?

Grow a spine. You're all parroting the same drivel without taking a single moment to actually sit down and objectively analyze what you're defending.

Sure, negativity is bad, but this level of toxic positivity is downright pathetic. Calling you blind would be an insult to the visually impaired, and even they see better.

WAKE UP.

Rick’s not your "uncle." He’s a cash cow. The Rick who wrote the original books out of love for his dyslexic son, Haley? He’s long gone. Now, he’s just cranking out low-quality, mediocre junk riding on the coattails of PJO—and you’re all partly to blame for this nosedive in quality. You’ve turned him into some untouchable deity and swallow whatever crap he dishes out.

GROW THE FUCK UP!

Or at least grow a pair of eyes and enough brain cells to realize that putting someone up on a pedestal and hero-worshipping them is is nothing short of idiotic and mindless. It's embarrassingly pathetic, making you look like you've got the critical thinking skills of a goldfish. You're not fans; you're mindless sheep, blindly following without a shred of individuality or intelligence.

And while we're on the subject, let’s tackle your pathetic defense of "it's a kids' show!", shall we? Enlighten me, what exactly qualifies as a kids' show?

Better yet, give me some names.

Starting with the classics—Tom and Jerry, Looney Tunes. Absolute staples of childhood entertainment. Ever heard of them? Of course, you have. These aren't just kids' shows; they’re household names around the globe.

How about Scooby-Doo? Powerpuff Girls? Samurai Jack? Each one a masterpiece, cherished by kids and adults alike. These shows have stood the test of time and are just as popular now as they were when they first aired. Scooby-Doo churns out new content every year, with a Japanese version on the way. Powerpuff Girls is not just getting a comic revival but also a new show with the original creator, Craig McCracken himself at the helm.

Ben 10? Danny Phantom? Avatar: The Last Airbender? Tell me, is there a soul in the multiverse who hasn’t heard of Ben 10? The show grossed $8 billion, and is listed among the highest-grossing shows ever.

Danny Phantom is still beloved, continuing in graphic novels and a fan-made crossover with Ben 10 called "5 Years Later" by Kuro the Ink Tank. It's so popular that even the official creators and voice cast have taken notice and appeared on their YouTube channel.

And A: TLA? If you're unaware of this goldmine, you've been living under a rock. It has continued in graphic novels, fan adaptations, and is so loved across all age groups that new movies are being made, with an ongoing live-action adaptation that, by all accounts, outshines the Percy Jackson show in quality—even without the original creators involved.

And oh, how could I forget? The Barbie movies—yet another cornerstone of kids' entertainment. Her fairytale classics have enchanted kids for generations. and let's not kid ourselves—whole families could enjoy them too. Take it from me, a grown man; when I was a kid and a Barbie movie came on, my entire family would gather around to watch. The music? Phenomenal. It introduced me to Tchaikovsky and Beethoven, and it's directly responsible for me taking up music studies myself. The animation, for its time, was spectacular and still holds up with a nostalgic, ethereal quality.

The stories were super fun, magical, and relaxing. I’ll never forget how my grandfather passed away listening to "Written in Your Heart" from The Princess and the Pauper. The impact these Barbie movies—meant for children—can have on a person speaks volumes about their magic and the love poured into them.

Finally we have My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. The pinnacle of "kids' shows". This show took the world by storm, leaving everyone wondering why adults are head over heels for a show meant for 5-year-olds. It ran for 9 seasons (with a 10th in the comics), nearly 400 comics, novels, mangas, role-playing games, toys, merch of all kinds, flash games, and fan works of such a massive volume that there are specific fandoms for them—animations, PMVs, comics, you name it (ever heard of Fallout: Equestria, Equestria at War?) And guess what? Much like Ben 10, MLP: FIM MLP: FIM is listed among the highest-grossing shows of all time, raking in over $6 billion.

There you have it—these are kids' shows. What do they all have in common?

Epic storytelling that grabs you by the throat and doesn’t let go. Gripping, multi-dimensional characters who feel so real you cry for them, laugh with them, and feel every triumph and heartbreak like it’s your own. Their arcs wring emotions out of you that you never even knew you had. Creativity so wild and off-the-charts it makes you wonder, “How the fuck did they come up with that?”

Unforgettable stories that burn into your brain, living rent-free in your memory forever. Awesome action scenes that have you gripping the edge of your seat, teeth chattering, heart pounding. Fantastic world-building and immersive lore that you feel like you're right there, living in those realms.

And despite being labelled as "kids' shows," they transcend age, nature, color, gender, nationalities. People of all walks of life love them. Why? Because they’re actually GOOD. Truly good.

These shows don’t just entertain kids; they build massive, loyal fandoms that span all ages. Adults are binge-watching these shows, buying the merch, and diving into the lore because quality entertainment knows no age limit.

Now, tell me with a straight face that the Percy Jackson Disney show compares even remotely to any of these actual kids' shows I’ve just mentioned. Does it have even one-tenth of the elements these shows boast?

And it's not like Percy Jackson lacks these elements—it does, very much so—IN THE BOOKS.

But the show? Bland as unsalted butter. You can't get more vanilla than that. Stilted acting, lackluster writing, exposition-heavy narrative—basically everything OP pointed out. They even watered down the fun and exciting story into a dreary "I'm dying" snooze-fest.

So if you’re out here using “it’s a kids' show” to justify bad, lazy writing, you need to sit down and rethink your life choices.

Seriously, stop. Just STOP using that phrase as a free pass for mediocrity. You’re insulting the audience and the entire medium.

Kids deserve better. We all do. You don’t write “for kids” or “for adults”—you write a good story, period. Quality storytelling resonates with everyone, no matter their age. Focus on making something great, and the rest will take care of itself.

People using “it’s a kids show!” as a defense for the PJOTV show makes no sense to me for many reasons, and one of the reason is that if the show’s questionable quality is a result of it being for children, how then do you explain or justify the removal or weakening of so many elements that kids enjoyed about the books in the first place?

You know one thing kids like? Cool action scenes, and yet most of the action scenes in the show were pretty lackluster. They were over within seconds, and largely replaced by conversations and exposition.

You know one thing kids like? Cool outfits and cool costumes, yet the costuming for the characters, especially the gods, was extremely bland, uninteresting, and devoid of any charm or personality.

You know one thing kids like? Humor. And yet the humor in this show was also very lackluster, especially in the way of Percy, who’s supposed to be a funny, snarky, and witty protagonist, and yet this depiction of him was incredibly dry.

You know one things kids like? Relatability. And yet you watered down or even straight up excluded so many of the character’s relatable traits, especially the depiction of ADHD/dyslexia, Grover’s shyness and cynical yet funny remarks, or Annabeth’s crush on an older friend figure or hear tearing up when it was time to leave the dog, or her grabbing Percy’s hand when they first get in the Underworld because she was scared.

You know one thing kids like? Bold personalities. Yet, so many of the gods are missing the elements that made them bold and memorable, and they just seem like nothing more than a bunch of grumpy adults.

You know one thing kids like? Mystery and suspense. And yet every chance this show had to build some, it was killed on arrival by the insistence that the characters needed to know everything.

You know one thing kids like? Funny references and fun twists. The Underworld was supposed to be set up like airport lines. The entrance was supposed to be a record studio named DOA (Dead on Arrival). Chiron was supposed to be in a fancy Italian suit and shoes. Each of the cabins and thrones on Olympus was supposed to be uniquely constructed and colorful to depict each god’s domain. And yet all of that got eliminated.

You know one thing kids like? Places and adventures that feel grand and magical. And yet, when it was time to show off grandeur at the Lotus Casino, we took away all the sky diving and reverse deer hunter games and replaced it with exposition, and activities that don’t seem magical in the slightest. And we didn’t even get to watch the characters play and be kids.

So how, just how, do y’all get off saying that we should go easy on the show because it’s “just a kid’s story”, and yet the show neutered most of the elements that endeared kids to this story in the first place?

[undead-knick-knack]

[bahja-blix]

One Helluva Shit Show! 🤡👇🏽💩

I'm sorry Vivziepop but... I hope you just cancel Helluva Boss 😂

Your show is the Literal definition of an Actual shit show 💩! Nobody wants it anymore like they used to back then. It's never going to be as popular as it used to be!

The specials held up for a little bit at 29M views

Those two Stolitz episodes were consistent but with a drop of 13M views which got us at 16M views

Then EP 11 rolled in and got the worst of it with a 6M view drop that was sitting at 10M views and recently went up to 11M views

Then Stolitz once again rolled in town and the views surprisingly went up at 3M+ increase that got us 14M views but still dripped

And lastly, The whole crew showed up and for the Grand Finale and it got 12M views... A 2M dip for the shows ratings

You've TANKED this show into Oblivion, Down straight into the toilet 📉🚽! The Ratings show, the Views show, and the Units of merch you Still haven't sold that occasionally hit the CLEARANCE RACK titled "Last Chance" that nobody wanted it in the first place, Also show!

The fewer units of merch you make, mainly because you can't produce as much as you used to because the show and it's products don't sell anymore!

Hell, not even people of Your political side wants it! Democrats DON'T Want this! Us LGBT folk Don't want this okay!? NOBODY Wants Your Shit Shows Viv 😂!

It happened in movies and in comics back then where people of your side try to pander to other Democrats and they never show up or help sell their shit because the audience you thought was on your side doesn't want this either mainly because there was never usually an audience to begin with.

Wanna know why Barbie and Oppenheimer were successful Viv? Because they DID something Right!

I don't want this as a Bisexual who's been in the LGBT community for more than a decade and This begs the question of the fact that:

We constantly ask you Vivziepop, who the HELL this shows even supposed to be for and You Yourself can't even answer that! You can't represent jack shit outta Anything or Anyone!

You can't represent, White, Brown, or Black communities, you can't represent the LGBT comm because you think that stereotyping the hell out of everything is necessary, you can't represent the disabled community. You know who represents ALL of that including me? JAPAN! know what else? Anime, Manga, and South Park!

You really sat here and opened your mouth somewhere on the Internet claiming to be a Creative Genius that and I quote "Took inspiration from South Park" really? ARE YOU SURE? Well then, Where's the fun satire and jokes that embrace that? Where's the charm that South Park has? Where the Hell is it?

Did you shove it up your ass? Like how you did shoving fucking Stolitz down everybody's throats because you think that shitty ass ships gonna save the show you wasted Millions of dollars on?

And turn around and claimed to want to make MORE of your crap nobody wants? You seriously think you can handle a THIRD SHOW? Like for Fuck sakes Loona, Can't even Save this show! That undeveloped weasel shit you made who I DID love at one point and Was my favorite until You fucked her All up and wasted large amounts of money on merch and made her into wasted space of screentime can't save this show because the only thing that Will (Scuse me) Might is STOLITZ!!!

The few extra views (As you can see in my screenshot above) certainly prove that! I can't believe that's what people want. A level lower than the depths of Hell itself...

And yet you Also sat here probably on Bluesky most likely of all platforms where you ran and hid because I called you out last time on X and you hid by locking your account down because you got scared over receiving criticism all around you yet again!

Probably because I'm an Actual diverse person and politically balanced in Every direction which is why people think TWICE before coming at me. Despite me being smaller than you, you knew not to fuck with me! But you'll go after other critics... wtf...

You my dear friend Vivziepop, are Weak in Spirit! You can't take the heat from other Democrats or Anyone because You Yourself think everyone who even lightly critiques you are All bigots when You and people of your ilk are the ones who have been creating actual bigotry for Years by Normalizing the fact that your shit shows are synonymous with incompetence. And That is on You!

Here we are as past fans who Used to look up to you Laughing at Your Ass because shit like this is Actually funny to watch!

Four seasons??? Like who the flying Fuck has the budget to pay for that cluster fuck of a catastrophe? Ain't no way you're going to deliver this shit in an age like this especially with the shift in politics! But that darn ol Vivziepop sure do gotta plan hidden up her sleeve and in that big ol head of hers now do ya Vivziepop?

Your brain must be filled with SEWAGE to look at this Fuckness and think that it's still okay! Look, Viv, at the end of the day, a polished turd, Is STILL a Turd!

I'll finish off by taking a look at Gooseworx! Obviously Goose and her amazing indie team is doing something Right! This show BLEW your ass and your shit shows away with one swipe of the pilots sword! 🗡️

While the Halloween Episode did Dip it's still very popular and is still noticeably gaining views faster than Helluva Boss. Notice how the McDonald's AU EP for Spudsys with Gangle's story gained an increase of 7M Views which got us At from 54M views to 61M views and STILL counting because I check Everyday on Gooseworx and Vivziepop's channels to see if anything moves and so far Gooseworx is moving but not that darn ol Vivziepop!

IN CONCLUSION

When it comes to Vivziepop, Let's just Mooove away from All this horse shit, stop allowing her to shove her brain diarrhea down everyone's throats and normalizing said sludge heaps. Let Vivs horrendous garbage heaps of shit just die straight into the depths of Hell where it belongs!

I'm Bajah-Blix and I'll see you All in the next one!

[necrowtic]

Haven’t watched i saw the tv glow but everything besides your crit has been positive, is it worth it or another fad?

its not a Bad Film necessarily its just a bit too surface level in what its trying to say while presenting itself as having Something More, best analogy i can think of is that its the barbie movie for transgenders

[leohtttbriar]

at this point i've written four different pairings that feature nyota uhura (because i'm obsessed with her) and it's sort of interesting for me to think about the ways uhura's linguist-ness plays out depending on whichever barbie i've decided to make her kiss.

like with t'pring the linguist-ness is front and center because it's an obvious way to bridge divides between two aliens and also a fun way for me personally to explore where aliens might differ from each other because at last one character (t'pring) only says rational and/or well-reasoned things and at least one character (uhura) is aware of linguistic realities and is also good at lit crit.

with jadzia, the linguist-ness is sort of an answerable intelligence to jadzia's technobabble smarts and uhura's command over language is a specific tool for both penetrating jadzia's performance and validating the performance for what it is, which makes the way they talk to each other a fun reifying of the art of conversation itself.

with rand, uhura's mastery of linguistics is a mastery of 'people', at least the abstract idea of them, which reflects rand's role of administration and personality-wrangling and professionalism in tos, so it's less a conversation between two opposing themes, like with t'pring and jadzia, and more an expansion on the theme that exists in both the leader of people and the linguist--an attending to the details and a carefully constructed distance between observer and observed.

and with chapel, the linguist-ness is incidental, so it doesn't really interact with the story. they're simply friends and chapel, by the transformative power of typing the slash key, just thinks uhura is hot.

[fancylala4]

Hi! I see where U reblogged my tangled crit posts 👀

I dont hate it, it just doesnt hit as well as it should. I prefer the barbie version. And I prefer Disney Rapunzel with ROTG Jack because not only they the same age but i find the parallels a bit more fascinating.

I remember seeing a arrow toy Rapunzel themed at Target, just recently I found out she was going to use a bow and arrow beforehand XD much much cooler than a frying pan!

Which begs to question! Why is the franchise so off with its girl characters? Gothel's entire motivation is staying young, Cass ended up a mess, Ariana is underwritten. And Rapunzel barely has another girl her age to hang out with. It's just Cass.

I get it. I disliked the movie at first because of the movie itself and how badly it was written but I started to hate the movie because of the rabid, racist fans and how badly they treated patf just to prop this movie up back in the day. The fandom is still pretty bad from what I seen.

The Barbie version is one of the best adaptations of rapunzel I have ever seen. It’s so good and it holds up perfectly well today except for the animation of course. If you get a chance, you should check out rapunzel’s revenge. It’s a great rapunzel comic and Disney took elements from that version as well.

I definitely agreed that Jack Frost and rapunzel would make a good couple. I liked them way better than him and Elsa and definitely would be way better than creepy dream.

Oh I saw that now in stores and I wonder why they made it when Merida is right there. I did hear that the series writers wanted her to have the bow and arrow but Disney didn’t like that idea. Probably because they wanted her to be helpless and didn’t want her to be taken seriously with a weapon. I remember looking at some Lego sets and I saw that rapunzel had a bow in a set for the series. So I think that rumor was true. Yeah, I would like the bow and arrow way better than that dumb frying pan. I guess it doesn’t matter since rapunzel wasn’t shown as a threat with the frying pan and it was more Flynn’s weapon in the movie.

Yeah, it’s so weird how this franchise is targeted towards little girls and all the female characters in it is just off and can be really offensive. Gothel is a walking outdated stereotype of many, rapunzel has no flaws, gets overshadowed in her OWN movie and couldn’t even drive the plot of the movie! It’s hard to believe this movie was made in 2010, it belongs in the 50s.

I have limited knowledge of the series characters but is cass the one who they made a villain and has blue hair like she’s some anime character? If so, It’s bad because I think I seen people say that she’s a villain because of how she looks and they turned a friendship into a bitter one just in a sake of something dumb. Do the writers think that girls have to be catty to each other or else it’s unrealistic? It’s a weird choice for a franchise targeted towards little girls. Ariana is the queen, right? I think I reblog a post about cultural appropriation in the movie and they mentioned her name. But really? They could have had a good plot point about rapunzel and her getting used to a good mother after what she’s been through. But they thought it was better just to focus on the king, have him be even more abusive to rapunzel than gothel was (reading her diary, following her everywhere and locking her up in a fucking tower after she just got out of one!!) and say that it’s ok because he’s doing it because he loves her.. I also “love” how the queen basically did nothing about this and just say supportive things rapunzel behind the king’s back like that means anything. Disney really needs to hire women for this franchise because this is just embarrassing and sad in this day and age.

[uninformedartist]

im sorry all of the other crit blogs are saying this was one of the ““better” eps but…for me it was just so…unpleasant. like even for helluva boss raunchy comedy standards it just felt gross. but i feel like an outlier

Yeah. Me aswell actually. I thought this would be a better episode, one the would explore Blitz's past, his relationship with his sister, have Moxxie and Millie shine on their own without Blitz but nope. It was a Blitz pity party fest how he's trying to help Barbie but she's rude, resentful and wants nothing to do with her dispte her having good reason to resent him. Nope lets absolutely destroy Barbie as a character, make her Versosika 2.0, a bitchy person who resents Blitz and add her being a groomer like Versosika being a sexual assaulter. Lets make a pointless shallow arc of giving Millie some "character" even though the whole arc of her feels forced and the cherry on top Barbie JUST so happens to be at the same camp M&M are doing a job at so that brings Blitz there too since he's looking for Barbie.

The episode was unpleasant in every aspect the world of helluva boss feel small since Blitz has to be included in every scene where he's not needed, have Barbie be in idk paris or something getting drugs why did it have to be at the exact camp they had a job at and where M&M were too.

It is the outlier, no excuse for the disgusting "comedy" in this episode, a grooming scene/themes, an incest joke, fetishising galore, playing on the audience's feelings to have sympathy for an abuser etc this entire episode is the pinnacle for everything helluva boss truly is and what its creators and die hard fans stand for/want to see/view as funny.

[eto-bee]

Marisha Ray and Matt Mercer just posted a photo of themselves dressed for Barbie and not only are they the best but I would love to be a fly on the wall of them discussing the movie in their car afterwards. Can I commission a 30m special of the Crit role crew discussing Barbie please

[skunkes]

just saw barbie and i get it now. ken is silly. Heart Eyes

yeah. yes. honestly i wont discuss it here but i DO have my crits of the film, my obsession isn't based on me thinking it was a Super Deep, Perfect Film etc but despite all of that it was in fact Fun and i wanna go watch it a 4th time for Ken alone honestly i love him i want him i want him i want h