#and thats not what theyre trying to do. theyre doing what THEY personally want to do. like they clearly dont care abt what others think lol
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30 Million Subscriber Q&A summary!
i didnt catch all the questions as i was writing as it was going (also english is not my first language so some things slipped, sorry about that)
Skim was also in the Q&A as he is a writer and director so i'm adding some of his answers too
now, the questions!
Q: Where was Alan in Animation vs Minecraft? A: The whole 3 seasons happened in like 4 hours and Alan isnt on his computer 24/7 so he probably was in another room or working on a laptop and leaving the sticks to their shenanigans
Q: how did Purple ended up in the mac with the villagers? A: in Alan's mind: since he came out of a thumbnail in 2011 he had like 7-8 years to live and learn. Somewhere in the journey he found a mac, minecraft, and made his little village
Q: is Animation vs Education canon in AvA/M? A: AvE was made to educate and trying to make it fit with AvA/M wouldnt make sense. it could be an alternative universe or a dream
Q: is The Dark Lord gonna come back? Alan: do you want him to come back? chat: YES (they already made a desicion. Alan: "You will see in an upcoming video")
Q: Who made stickfight.com? A: Giving how stickfigures work in the universe, some animator made them and thats how they became to be
They have a plan for Green's socials (didnt say anything more)
Q: Would they be Hatsune Miku fans? A: They get obssesed with things easy so everyone would be Hatsune Miku fans. Alan says Red maybe more than the other (Skim says Yellow)
Q: Are The Second Coming and The Chosen One meant to have a brother type relationship? A: Long lost brothers, born from the same source but they're strangers, they dont know each other
if the series keeps going Alan thinks that they might need to focus on another characters cuz there would be nothing more to tell about the main characters
Q: What would their voices sound like? A: Alan personally doesnt think they have voices (tho he say they have kinda telepathic communication) text in influencer arc is like them translating for us :o
fun fact: whooshes were made with a wood ruler fun fact: there's a short with Blue coughing, that's Skim
Q: What happens with death stickfigures? A: Their code is still there just not connected. like theyre in another dimention and its imposible for someone in the living dimention to take the code and revive them (unless they know? idk it was vague)
More adventures to come with different pairs of sticks!
Q: Favorite part about writing stories? A: Making them feel believable, real, like something that could happen (theyre really in the videogame or interacting with that person in the computer)
Q: How old are the stick figures? A: They dont have an official age, you can see them as teenagers/early 20s (because of their personalities) "is not like they're people and age the same"
Q: Do you think AvM tournament arc is a good idea? A: good idea, brainstorming something similar
Q: Would you think of making a series about TCO/TDL or slice of life of the mercenaries? A: Great ideas, would be experimenting with the shorter episodes
Q: Is AvA 12 coming this year? A: Summer if everything goes fine
Q: How Purple met King orange? A: "You've seen the tunnels conecting the outernet and the internet, thanks to the wings Purple could travel safely and meet him"
Q: When is Purple's birthday? A: Alan doesnt know and thinks Purple wouldnt know either (maybe february? Alan feels like it would be)
Q: What are the/would there be Mercenaries official names? A: Become a member to know what production calls them
Q: Least favorite Character? A: Alan is not that emotionally attached to The Chosen One (cuz he's not very emotionally developed) (they have plans for that)
Q: Favorite Episode? A: episode 30 AvM
Q: If you turn off the computer, what happens to the character? A: Think of it as when electricity goes off. Is dark, is cold, nothing works, cant interact with anything. They probably just sleep.
Q: Is AvA/M same universe? A: Same universe, they happen offset of each other (like an alternative path created after discovering minecraft). Sometimes AvA is first, sometimes they happen at the same time (very messy timelines ngl)
Q: Would Mitsi be revived? A: We will see
Alan doesnt play among us (idk random chat question hehe)
Q: Are you planning another series? something different? A: Theyre gonna try with the minisodes
Q: Why are there so many Green episodes and little of the others? (concert, influencer arc, prank) A: They had the ideas before deciding who, is coincidence. They want to even it out.
Q: Why are newer AvM so childish? A: Alan didnt see them as childish and a lot of the audience are children (younger than 30) so
Q: Who made Corndog guy? A: Skim did and he is sorry
Q: Was AvM season 3 planned from the start or was it made as it was going? A: It was a skeleton and got stuff added (like the Warden was added as soon as they knew about it) (Alan contacted the creator of the Warden and he didnt answer until after the episode released lol) The golden apple was a placeholder for whatever the Warden dropped
Q: Will King's son come back? A: Do you want to? (another poll, chat was very divided) "thank you for the feedback" and said nothing more
Alan has cried after watching the finished animation (cried with King and Victim's stories)
Q: Has the story changed? A: Yes, Alan didnt plan to do more after AvA 1
Q: How long did it take to write AvM season 3? A: It took months. Alan got ideas while watching Avengers. King is inspired in Thanos and Purple in Loki
Q: What are some quirks the sticks have? A: Green likes udon noodles and listens to daft punk. Yellow could be into rubiks cube, Blue could be superstitious (horoscopes and astrology), Red has the most ADHD so whatever people with ADHD do. There's nothing "official" and we fans can give them some.
Q: Character you relate the most? A: Alan: The Second Coming. He's he older brother/father figure. Little silly and wants to stay home all day. Skim relates to Victim (connected while writing him.) Quiet and wants to keep occupied with work, has problems relating with people but gets stuff done
Q: How long does it take to make an AvA episode? A: Depends, last one took a year (because of all the new things) 6-8 months if everything goes fine (theyre working on AvA 13 as well)
Q: Is Purple part of the group now? A: Kinda. Like the friend who doesnt live there but visits a lot
Q: Why the name Mitsi? A: Someone sugested reverse Victim's name and change some letters
Q: If you could rewrite someone who would it be? A: Bob
Q: Would there be scary videos? A: Yeah? (kids like scary so maybe?)
Q: Episode you're most proud of? A: Right now Animation vs Adiction
Q: Upcoming video you're excited the most? A: (to avoid spoilers they mentioned the bedwars episode and Alan is excited for the next season of AvM) (Skim is excited for AvA 12&13 and said they're kinda like 2 parts of the same episode 👀)
Q: Would you upgrade to Windows 11? A: Is in discussion
Q: Are there gonna be new characters introduced? A: In AvM maybe, in AvA there's room for that, dont know about mayor characters
Q: Why the sticks dont talk? A: It was unintentional but it turned out fine. no script, no lipsync, no voice actors, more international audience
Q: Animation vs Roblox? A: they have no idea how to do it. it had to be a series and each episode they play different famous games (dont get your hopes up for this one)
Q: When are the mini episodes coming out? A: soon
Q: How rich is corndog guy? A: Not rich enough
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what intrigues me abt caines dynamic w the rest of the cast is the way that none of them seem to understand why he is the way he is. like not in the comedic sense but how they dont seem to have a clear concept of his motivations or anything of that sort
we havent seen toooo much of it. but we have seen how pomni, zooble, jax, ragatha, and gangle view him and its so fascinating
pomni is like. she doesnt understand what hes doing but seems to view his actions as malicious in some way. i dont think she sees him as a 'mean' person but with how she says she thinks he wants her to suffer its very illuminating of how she sees him as someone who wants all of them to hurt. i dont think she knows why he would, but its the only conclusion shes got. it also speaks to her distrusting nature that upon being hurt by him her first thought is that its an intentional decision to harm her, and unfortunately for caine she hasnt actually been given much of a reason to think he feels otherwise. i dont know how she thinks caine feels about them but its clear to me how she views his goals and hobbies for lack of a better term
zooble doesnt trust him. they find him to be annoying but more significant is that they KNOW he likes them all. it adds an interesting tone to how they see him, that they specifically say that whats 'holding caine back' is that he 'likes [them]', which on one hand is them interpretting caines actions as being done from a place of liking the players, and that his actions are coming from a place of NOT hurting them, because he likes them (its interesting to note that they have participated in less adventures, so its unclear how much they know abt caines adventures firsthand). but on the other hand is implying that they think caines holding himself back at all. that there IS a desire or a capability to be cruel that theyre wary of. theyve also seen caine at his most vulnerable (in the show itself at least) and their comment, 'whose therapy session is this again?' implies theyre at least aware that this is caine having his own problems, though i dont think theyre comfortable safety-wise with how these problems affect them and the others. them asking caine 'why did you think i would like that?' speaks to the idea that they do think hes genuinely trying to appeal to the players, but they seem to find his lack of understanding of the players frustrating and unsafe for all of them
jax i think is pretty vague since most of his lines to caine are brief, and the most telling line he has abt caine is the only one we have. but he seems neutral on caine as a whole. caine is just a guy who makes things for them. he tries to entertain them and thats all jax really seems to be concerned with- whether his 'its not in his nature' line is reflective of him genuinely Believing that is smth i see debated often but i think no matter what, it conveys that jax Generally sees caine as someone who isnt malicious. hes not trying to hurt them, and whether or not he thinks caine is capable of hurting them is whats less vague. either way, jax doesnt seem to like or dislike caine
ragatha has very mimimal interactions with caine and not many lines about him, but i think her line in the pilot, 'thats just one of caines little adventures. theyre just something fun to do to, yknow, prevent us from going insane,' is extremely telling of how she sees caine. of all of them, she seems to have the most positive view of caine, since she interprets his actions as an active attempt to stave off abstraction in the players. whether or not she thinks caine is acting from a place of wanting to stop disruptions or if he wants to ensure the players arent doing as unwell as they could IS up for debate though. the way she talks about him in the pilot in general reads like she has some level of trust in him, but it seems like a surface level trust in him at the worst- she knows hes not malicious and knows he wants to help. she knows he can help her when shes jumbled. but its not clear if she Likes him. she seems to enjoy the adventures though (which, ill keep it brief so i dont derail this, but it honestly reads like a deliberate parallel writing-wise that the two of them both seem fond of distractions as an acceptable solution to a bad situation- if her assessment of Why he makes the adventures is anything to go by)
gangle is harder to read on this front, as she has way less lines about him, though she does have multiple notable interactions with him in ep 4, in the way of her seeming genuinely enthusiastic about his adventure (it doesnt seem completely directed at him, but she seems genuinely a bit happy about his praise of her leadership skills). when she calls him it doesnt convey TOO much i dont think but the way she talks to him and requests he make a punishment could imply she doesnt think hed normally make one, but also that hes not opposed to it, which is confusing in what it means about how she sees him but it feels important. her interaction with him at the end of the episode also doesnt convey much in this way (i feel like caine is not the main focus of most of that scene- which works for the scene and is good writing wise bc the scenes important for gangles writing of her own problems, but in terms of breaking down this idea it means im not sure this scene conveys much about how she sees him)
and then. i didnt mention kinger at the beginning specifically bc i dont think we have... almost any indicators of how he sees caine. he tells caine abt kaufmo in ep 1, suggests caine could find pomni in ep 2, doesnt address the thing pomni says abt caine in ep 3, and even his suggestion in ep 4 to sit out the adventure doesnt convey almost anything. the only throughline is that kinger sees caine as someone who can help them if they ask, but it doesnt convey any thoughts on what he thinks caines motivations are or his thoughts on caines actions. which frankly reads like a deliberate choice when kinger should be the one with the most history with caine
this post is long but i just am bery intrigued by this. i thinka ll the character dynamics are so deeply fascinating but with caine being the closest the show has to an antagonist (which of course is a loaded statement but i mean it in the writing sense and not in the 'antagonist is evil' way) it means that the way the characters see him holds a lot of weight. it conveys a lot abt them all with how they interpret the person that has (at least on the surface) the most control over the situation
#tadc#im tired but i thought abt this and just kept typing until this post was created#but like. yeah#caine is a fascinating character on his own i also just rly like how the others characters are highlighted#by how they talk abt him and how they interact w him#thats not even factoring my own ideas that start getting into theory/hc territory#since i wanted to keep this to stuff weve seen#but like. the classic is. do they KNOW hes an ai?#bc it changes so much imo#i dont think they do. i think kinger knows but im not sure the rest of them know#and even w kinger? i dont know if its smth he actively thinks abt#so much as is smth he knows more intrinsically#zooble might know but it depends on where they think the separation between caine and the circus is#they know caine getting upset(?) made the circus glitch which#as the audience w the knowledge caines an ai we can go oh thats bc of this or that and it makes sense cus hes an ai#but i dont think the players have that foundation. i think some could suspect hes an npc but i dont think most of them#understand him further than that. in terms of what he is#as far as they know he could jsut be another person in the game who happens to have authority over them#its obvious hes an ai once you know but he has limited interactions with them already#they dont know what he does when theyre not around#idk its just very cool but i think i might be talking in circles im really tired#oh man why is this 1200 words
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lights character really isnt as simple as “doesnt actually care about justice/only cares about justice”



all these panels are from one single conversation which i think fits what im trying to say. he does genuinely want to make the world a better place (just look at those big genuine eyes….talking about killing people…but still) AND he wants to be god. making the world a better place means hes not a bad person. being a god means hes not a bad person because hes the one responsible for passing judgment. it means he did have the right to kill those two people. all of this means that all he was doing was making the world better so hes not a bad person or a murderer for killing those two people.
i think its interesting how he mentions hell also be killing off people who harass others or are immoral through illnesses or accidents. possibly because the motorcycle dude (who died from an accident) wasnt a hardened criminal and he needs to validate that murder (he even noted that he didnt think he deserved the death penalty before he switched up)

but doing all this desensitizes him to death (and breaks his psyche). he starts seeing it more like a game than taking human lives and justifies it with his status as god. he takes pride in disposing of those who try to catch him with the justification that theyre supporting evil. he makes a pretty big effort to use justifications like that whenever he kills people “theyre evil for defying kira/theyre the evil ones/theyre protecting the guilty/blah blah” because he needs to justify it in his head that hes still in the right. that his actions are right. his sadistic glee at killing them could even be relief at the thought of eliminating people who see him as evil because at the end of the day being evil might just be what scares him most. its almost like killing off these people calling him immoral represents him trying to annihilate his guilt.




its also worth mentioning that he has a logical explanation for wanting to become god too. he thinks if they know someones passing judgement then theyll stop committing crimes out of fear which is what he wants. he can want both things and he does
he justifies the accident that made him into a murderer using his status as god but then defends his descent into becoming what he hates with it as well. its a double edged sword. even by the end, i still think he wants to make the world a better place. the problem is hes trying to remove the rot from the world “but its not enough! this world is still rotten!” but as ryuk said, so long as hes still in it thats not possible
#light yagami#death note#no matter how much i reread these posts i never feel ready to post them lol#i hope this is consumable
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love thinking kipperlilly spends her afterlife looking for lucy in a familiar forest
#not art#fhjy#fhjy spoilers#like. does she have a mean of knowing lucy and yolanda got sent to cassandra's domain to hang out for a bit#kipperlilly's isolation means so much to me. she is punished for everything she's done she just doesn't pick up on it#until the moment she dies! one more funky thing that mirrors riz in which he's actively tried to cultivate a community and denied it#until the bad kids. while kipperlilly does not want or care about a community she just wants someone who validates her#but she does Need a community so she latches onto the person she lets closer to her to fulfill her emotional needs#she took the ritual willingly so this might genuinely be her first death. probably terrifying#probably not even enough bandwidth to feel mortified. maybe immediately seeking something comforting out of instinct alone#lmao honestly thinking too much abt fantasy high afterlifes gives me a headache And a visceral fear#Im not religious but I grew up in a culture with a dominantly buddhist/taoist cosmology its Scary that u just go to A Place after u die!!#and then ur still urself!!! thats scary to me what do u mean u stay like that forever. thats fucked#but yeah I think this influences how I see kipperlilly turn out a little bit. in a sense I think of her as being a ghost now#yknow. trying to solve something from life so she can move on and. stop living this life etc#man the reveal that lucy took being killed pretty seriously and is like yeah the others are decent and even sweet#and probably was just trying to hold her party together and do what she thinks is moral by hearing kipperlilly out#lol lmao etc. gods I gotta wonder how kipperlilly's mindset handled jawbones' help#it really is damn tragic tho. I stand by what I said folks like this will complain and be nasty to be around#but they dont have enough desire to inconvenience themselves to off the bat do something abt what they find unfair or whatever#its when theyre handed the seemingly very easy means to be right that they'll start being dangerous#its horribly tragic that the supposed metaplayer and the self-perceived mastermind turned out to ultimately be just an useful idiot#yknow what. I think personally in my heart kipperlilly moves on from her afterlife the moment she says sorry#doesnt even have to be to lucy but that's probably gonna be who received it#ah.... teenage rebellion. teenage gamejacking
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why are ppl always so mean about taz :(
#every time theres a new arc everyone who only liked balance is like 'oh if u dropped off after balance u have to listen to THIS arc bc its#JUST LIKE BALANCE'#every damn time.#it happened with ethersea a bit but especially w steeplechase and vs dracula#and u get ppl in the notes of these posts saying 'oh yeah i fucking hated everything after balance sooo glad theyre finally doing exactly#what i want them to!!'#like. its ok to have personal preference but dont be mean about it :(#and comparing every campaign to balance is rlly annoying sry#let them be their own thing#stop being so blinded by nostalgia ig#like not to be rude but. i think ppl think balance is the most Perfect Thing Ever but its rlly...not#all the campaigns have flaws but i aint canceling them for that#like what happened with grad#idk its like if balance came later ppl would probably be much more mean about it#bc they wouldnt be blinded by nostalgia as much or smthn#anyways#at the end of the day the mcelroys shouldnt be expected to make a replica of balance every campaign#and thats not what theyre trying to do. theyre doing what THEY personally want to do. like they clearly dont care abt what others think lol#theyre experimenting and having fun#its like. a free podcast with a bunch of silly dudes playing for funsies. they shouldnt have such high expectations or be demonized#in any way#my point being. if i see anyone being mean abt taz u get blocked#>:(#coon speaks#not tagging taz. i dont wanna see nasty ppl in my notifs ty
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A succubus and a demon! (The succubi don't have names but the demon is Kronos and the succubus is one of his bosses in Hell and he's not /fond/ of the succubi for many reasons but they all adore picking on him)
Also because I love them and like to point it out, the succubi act more as pleasure dealers in the sense of they offer up whatever a human wants most in exchange for their soul. It's rarely of a sexual nature since it's what they want MOST in life. And most people's ambitions are outside of a bedroom. (happy pride, asexuals are able to get affected by a succubus now without discrimination)
#my characters#did i make succubi in a plot that i could fall victim to as an asexual personally? yeah#kronos is just a petty lil baby with a younger brother who is very nice for a demon#kronos is responsible for being a dick to everyone in the plot and yet has the weirdest morals and its not fine#but hes gonna make that everyone elses problem not his#for instance he originally goes to earth bc a human has somehow just stolen all of the Devils attention and its annoying#why fixate on one human doomed to Hell just let the guy live and die then fixate#so he goes to kill the human but ends up saving the guy and then agonizes because even as a demon#its REALLY tacky to save someone and then kill them#so he doesnt kill him and instead demands to be a roommate until he returns to hell#and then they team up to kill demons and other creatures that seem obsessed with the human#and so they just kinda kill and banish demons back to hell and its fiiiine kronos is just causing problems for Hell#thats not even a new issue hes always doing that !#and then they meet a siren who refuses to talk and kronos is like oh time to be the biggest dick ever#and is like well if she wont talk and she needs a name i vote halibut#as a mean joke bc why would she want to be named after a fish#and she lights up and is SUPER happy and nods and beams and is so happy with her new name#and then the human is like well she needs more clothes than one outfit right#also shes barefoot and its cold i need to buy her shoes idk what tho#and kronos is like here buy her these rainboots and so the guy buys them and is like just wear these#until you can show me what you want bought ok and halibut is in love with her cute lil yellow rainboots#so basically everything kronos does out of spite to the weird mute siren (by choice) backfires#and she adores him and doesnt know hes trying to be mean to her#anyway the succubi collectively like to pick on the really silly and childish demons they outrank#like kronos! so he is constantly a target for them to mock which is why he isnt fond of them which fuels them more#the succubi are just really chill most of the time though ?#and its just. i love my succubi ok theyre wonderful#and that has been another story time in the tags bye
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i love madoka magica however i dont think we as a fandom talk enough about how tragic madoka herself is. probably because the narrative itself steers you away from thinking about her personally. shes not a character shes a desire that homura has, shes a force of good, shes homura's foil. but those are all madoka's narrative roles but madoka herself as a person is not really looked at because we are viewing this world from an unreliable narrator(homura) who only sees madoka as those things. The best thing homura could have done for madoka was give up on her, to let her go. because every time we go back in time the image of madoka is distorted, she loses more of herself every regression of homura's as she tries harder and harder to save her. We don't even know what madoka originally wished for to become a magical girl in the original timeline. and she actually acts quite differently than the madoka we meet. shes a lot more honest and caring and bold. by the time homura's has reached the actual anime madoka has been reduced by the sands of time to a figment of herself. she has no wants or desires of her own beyond wanting to do good and help her friends and when all her humanity is stripped away is when she finally acends to godhood because thats all thats left of her. an ideal and a faith in her. madoka kaname died a long time ago and all that is left is her ghost.
#of course homura doesnt care anymore because she cant go back she can only go forward cuz if she gives up she killed madoka for nothing#she could have left her pass away with dignity but now shes a ghost stuck in a web of time and the only thing she can do is keep trying#to save her#i feel like inately homura knows this but she doesnt want to admit to herself thats shes the real one who killed madoka kaname#this is a very charitable reading of homura#homura died too but its a clear moment because homura is our narrator#homura akemi will never come back madoka kaname will never come back#but life goes on anyway for homura#heres my truth#i loved rebellion but im actually a bigger fan of the original anime's ending so im glad it seems like red ribbon homu is coming back#i thought that ending was a lot more hopeful and beautiful and rebellion was kind of a downer but i always accepted they were parallel#and seems im right based on posters#for walpurgis#madoka uses one of my favorite literary devices which is the underuse of a character#i dont know whats it called but i love it when they dont outright develop a character usually to signal an upholding of the status quo#i already explained how madoka is not shown as a character but they do this in princess tutu too with mytho#mytho is a character from a book hes not real in the way that the others are and therefore cant actually change like the others can#hes always the focus of others and never the one thinking of others#i mean yeah he spends like the whole anime thinking about tutu but thats PART of his book its not him as a person#anyway ive been talking too much but i wanna bring up my favorite subtle use of this in takopi's original sin#the boy#idk his name rn lmao#hes straight up not present for the bulk of the manga and hes legit just absent from the ending scene despite being one point of a triangle#at first that weirded me out like??? he doesnt get closure???#but the reason was he didnt need it#the focus and moral is that those girls were 'weird' unable to be normal (because of trauma) and their closure was theyre at least together#but he doesnt need that because hes already normal hes the status quo a benchmark for the reader for the reader to judge the characters off#and the characters to judge eachother off of#anyway anyway sorry this has been so long#i had to get all of that out of me
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Grits my teeth
#dont get involved in the shuro drama. dont. dont chime in. not worth it.#someone scruff me im tired of these stupidass takes#like 1. he is a grown ass man. he can correct people himself.#2. he is not a real person. its admirable that you would insist on the comfort of a real life asian who has been stuck with a nickname#but he is not a real life person. he is a character written by a japanese woman who calls him shuro as a shorthand in nearly everything#3. as an east asian 100% hearing people who used to call you by a slightly incorrect nickname suddenly try to use your legal name#UNCOMFORTABLE. hate it. i do not blame that man for not bothering or potentially not wanting to correct laios and others#AND FURTHERMORE#YOU CAN SEE HOW KUI HANDLES NAME PREFERENCES WITH IZUTSUMI VS THE REST OF SHUROS RETAINERS#they have real names too but they use their given code names so thats what theyre listed as in all canon material#izutsumi is introduced as asebi but its a footnote in her character entry bc she doesnt want that name
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Some mild existential dread in the house today
#im just feeling reeeeally really drained#works taking a LOT out of me#like. it feels less intense day to day? or maybe im reacting less? but its still very much piling up#and im just feeling very...idk. like im still waiting for permission to live my life#except now the permission osnt coming from any one person its. having the money to docit#and the time and the energy#and i guess thats just what adult life is? waiting#and hoping#and along the way losing sight of what i even wanted in the first place because im so *tired*#idk. i definitely need a project of some kind but im struggling to settle on something and then organise it#i have stuff to do today anyway. alfie had a lil bit of emergency cash saved so i need to go shopping#and i need to tidy the kitchen and do some dishes#and have a bath and shave at some point#i also want to draw but again. struggling ti pick something and idk if ill have the executive function spare#AND i want to try and be more social and talk to folks but thats its own kind of difficult#part of me would like a disc server that just has all of my friends in it bc i find it easier to dip in and out of conversarions#but i imagine that would be weird for folks who dont know each other#idk. lot goin through my mind when all i really want is sleep#which also hasnt been...greeeeat lately#mainly because Alfie wakes me up in the mornings bc they dont like being alone but also have a very different sleep schedule to me#and can take multiple smaller naps over a day whereas i really need a solid 8 or so hours or i just. dont fully switch on#but theyre also struggling atm (mentally and also they got an injury at work AND seperately broke their foot ffs)#so they need me more and its just#this never ending cycle of SOMETHING needs my attention#and its fucking exhausting asfghfkd#but!!! we keep goin!!!!! been applying for a bunch of jobs and havent heard anything positive yet but. we keep tryin huh
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Must a gradfilm have a message. Is it not enough for them to be ghosts who are gay
#'okay so theyre a gay couple thats fun but whats the message' its just a fun little gay movie im not trying to be revolutionary okay!!!!!!!#like i get it. but also this is just for fun its not that deep im not a deep person#thinking now if i should add a message but???? i only have 2 and a half months to fully animate this and its already 2 min 40 do u want me#to die#anyway#caleb rambles
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Challenging myself by opening up to my friends more and being honest about how I feel is like learning to walk on coals without screaming in pain. But I do it regardless.
#this change happened 2 days ago okay? im still learning the proper amount of sharing tho#i dont want to overshare or undershare#someone once told me ‘match their energy’ in terms of talking vulnerably but. im not sure thats the move???#‘how are you?’ ‘good. you?’ in that scenario I would only reply with good too#but if its my friends its like… do they think I dont care? are they busy but still wanted to send a text?#do they want me to not ramble so theyre keeping it short? or do they want to hear about how I am actually?#how do you even talk to someone more if they respond so short? it always to me equals disinterest in talking#im trying not to think it is that and opt to think they r busy. but what if they’re ready to throw me out already?#what if Im not good enough? what if they were using me for something and are done now? what if they hated me the whole time but cant hide it#man. overthinking will be the goddamn death of me. it is literally not that deep sometimes#but I know it CAN be sometimes. and notoriously has been my experience. so I keep my walls up#but I gotta start beating the shit out of those walls w/ a wrecking ball so I can finally get close to someone#but I hate the thought of trusting the wrong person#ANYWAYS……….#vent posting#vent post#vent#cw vent#vent cw#tw vent#vent tw
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Did or does anything inspire your art? It’s so fun and unique
I do have artists (both Established and like Peers/Mutuals) I enjoy and I do pluck traits from art I like as I see fit to mold my own but I don't have any conscious inspiration ykwim...ive had ppl tell me my art looks like or reminds them of things i like, whether "vibe based" (stuffed animals) or a specific media (care bears) but i dont consciously draw inspiration from care bears ykwim... I could tell u i loved archie comics as a kid and i love the art style but thats not a good answer to the question bc it doesnt present itself in my work (and if it does its not on purpose) ykwim...i hope dis makes sense.
I always bring up Urasawa when this question comes up, like I love urasawa's art and often save lots of it for inspiration but my work doesnt really ever come out as an emulation of his as a result, it's more osmosed as I try to figure out how I want to draw, bc I haven't seen anyone who draws the way I'd like to yet. (Also using him as an example, as this is how I feel about all my other "inspirations").
Theres tons of different ways to draw every possible trait of a face or body etc, so I just do that, taking shapes and such from other artists i observe along the way without really picking up the influence (and if i do its never for very long), since I've yet to find anything im very happy with
#ive never understood how people do those inspiration boards and you can SEE how all the people they list influence their art#if i could scrounge together enough artists that inspire me then i dont think you'd even be able to tell unless you Guessed#if that makes sense#similarly i do have thousands of folders of artists and mutuals' art i have saved#to go look back at for inspiration...but its not direct inspiration#like zaftiguy2 on twitter (NSFW) is an inspiration of mine....you would never guess though bc what I osmose from his work doesn't#present itself very upfront in my stuff‚ if at all#does this make sense? i feel when ppl ask others this question is bc they wanna see more art adjacent to that of the person theyre asking#but unfortunately its not like that for me ykwim :(#id be much much better if there was someone who drew the way i want to draw that i could copy off of LOL#my art is so bad BECAUSE i feel like im making it from scratch. and im bad at coming up with things#anonymous#skunk mail#so thank u for thinking its unique bc i personally think its very generic as a result#like. entry level art style#off the top of my head artists i LIKE are kemafili manaohu and yawningyawns#on twitter....kemafili is on here though (kemafili1 on twitter)#those are artists i have in my ''fave'' folder. theres others i think but thats the only ones i can think of rn#i also have tons of artist folders saved in general but read my above statements about inspiration#eraserplains is another one... they're on tumblr too#i like raymodule (tumblr) and robottoast (twitter) but again not in a way where im like wow i want to draw exactly like that lets try
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Man I fuckin hate how people will do the dishes in this house and put it all in the dishwasher and then not even turn it on. And then stuff gets left in there for days while the whole time there's not a single usable glass in the whole house.
#what is the thought process??? wait until the washer is full??? meanwhile every glass in the house is sitting in there????#at that point who cares about only having to turn it on once!?!?!?! are you trying to save momey on water or something???#AND I KNOW ITS NOT MY MOM OR GRANDPARENTS DOING#ITS EITHER MY UNCLE OR HIS WIFE AND I GUESS THATS THEYRE MENTALLY BUT MY GRANDPARENTS CAN AFFORD TO PAY THE WATER BILL SO JUST TURN IT#THE FUCK ON. WHO CARES.#ITS NOT LIKE THEY USE THE DISHES IN THEIR HOUSE ANYWAY#I WANT THEM FUCKING GONE FOR FUCKS SAKE#personal
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I love taking care of people omggg 😍😍😍
#i love when i can go into nurse mode and get people what they need and run through the checklist of what helps#especially if i know the person because then i already have a handle on preferences or what they typically need#i have like. half a degree for a few things and i have a specific interest in physiology and psychology#i also used to really enjoy crisis management and peer support stuff but theres a lot of elements of that i cant do anymore#because the toll that shit takes is more than i can pay#specifically crisis related events#theres a lot I have to work through yet before i can manage those situations#anyway. my dream situation would be to work with someone to help them figure out what they need#like. assess the situation. find resources if needed. check on their ability to address basic daily tasks. make crisis plans.#start some basic dbt conversations and try to figure out what help they need and how to get it#i know some people dont want to go to a traditional psychiatrist or psychologist for whole host of extremely valid reasons#so being able to help them with self help or finding other alternatives. or just like. being a person they can regularly talk and vent to#because sometimes people don't have anyone. and just one person in their life can make a major impact#and like. its not exactly like therapy in that way. like i have the knowledge base to incorporate aspects of it in if wanted/needed#i think some people just need to be heard and that can help them move forward#and my goal isnt to like. transform you or whatever. there are people out there who need help but its hard to start#or it's difficult for them to access what they know they need#and i just want to meet people where theyre at and help them take enough small steps to being able to live how they want#like. harm reduction type shit. if you just need clean needles thats a step forward. and maybe its the only step they feel they need#to be happy. and now they can have a little bit of a safety.#like. a little more agency over how they want to live their life while improving quality of life#a step is a step man#anything that moves you toward the life you want counts#you deserve a win#the edible hit part way through so sorry if theres incomplete and tangential thoughts#also how can i do this shit for profesh??#i know similar jobs exist but theres a huge foundation of shit i just dont agree with built into them
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Wistfully thinks of Spellwind, I should make a headcanons up to ep 31 list its just my equivalent of like Skyrim or lotr where theres so much going on and so dense but god damn one of my favorite episodes was when two of my favorite characters became trees and the entire experience was like...they were tripping on shrooms but also one with the shrooms? Its like episode 8
and I love the dms orc captain that hates going on land and is there for the in between transportation from sea to sea land to land ferryman (not really I feel like its mostly hard to narrate and have a character at the same time) I just love captain buttocks' (yeah I'm pretty sure thats his name) humor and how him and djett ('jet') were closer in the beginning
I love ty and varsha together but I also ship smith with them as time went on, I can't tell who I want to joke as the third smith and varsha are friends to lovers, ty and varsha are irritated assholes to lovers, smith is just a jaded old fuck that loves his morons (he respects varsha a lot and thinks ty is an entertaining idiot)
Varsha and Djett are siblings they love each other like family and share different spells and potions and knowledge of interest notes
I feel like the only person really thinking too deeply about this tabletop story and wanted to drop a few lines of appreciation, I like listening to it to go to sleep since its so slow paced and gently spoken and the music and sound efx is so sweet
#spellwind#ttrpg#table story#homebrews are my favorite of genre of story telling right now#its what got me into midnight burger#Spotify knew what kinda creative storytelling I liked and said#pbbt here you go guy you need to listen to more audiodramas without the dice in the mix#the way podcasts can tell stories is so cool#dice rolling#describing everything thats going on in a natural dialogue so that it paints a picture for the person listening as if theyre part of it#like youre in the environment with them it was a really smart way to carve a story and narrative#wolf 359#wolf 395#idk off the top of my head I'm trying out a few episodes but I like how its a blend of that similar storytelling method but like also??#log entries and some conversation between characters which is mostly how midnight burger does it#aaaa I just love audiodramas#and tabletop actual plays#I want so badly to do ttrpgs but this is my live vicarious through the media I consume era until I can find ppl that wanna let me take try#and be a DM#I could totally make engaging stories like the things I listen to#its like execution of the stories that go on inside my head the tones the themes I wanna touch on the emotions I want to convey#at the same time theres a small part of me thats like mehh but they did it already but I can still share that vibe for people that either#have or haven't chewed up the same things I love over and over and over like a maniac#plus I still have my own take and taste and ideas its just a time and place thing#I have a trillion ideas written out I just have to sort them out and do some stitchwork on the canvas that is the blank page#embroidery on those sweet words and patchwork a story ive been brewing in mind#this is slightly a personal ramble about story making#and also a segway into a sideblog thats not 100% midnight burger#I wonder how this blog will evolve over time
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tbh i might go ahead and put dungeons in as a part of the bellum x linebeck fic's plot since like. 1) struggling to actually figure out a main plot and having dungeons as sort of bit points to hit and be little bits of fitting exploration and bonding and 2) i do kinda want to do dungeons. i like thinking of them and again i do think its fitting.
#bellum x linebeck fic#albw fucks thats where i got the idea. i mean dungeons are a general loz thing but albw is rlly good with a bunch of dungeons#the deal now is like. why are they doing dungeons (beyond. linebeck likes treasure and adventure and bellum likes doing stuff with him)#it doesnt really need to be an endgame thing if that makes sense. a mid to late story plot as smth extra for them to do to interact with#the world and ig the issue is that i cant figure out what they'll get out of these dungeons. considering theyre a bit morally fucked. so#i'll have to think on that. will prolly do only a few bc. yknow. or could do some other kinda of like. major points to hit. but tbh dungeon#do fit in since ppl go exploring a lot and ive been playing with the idea of a fantastical system that like. refills dungeons if theyre#influenced by certain magic or w/e. i like the great sea having a lot of magic kinda just. existing around the world unchecked#it def gives a lot of opportunity for worldbuilding and like. things to do and have exist in the great sea setting. anyways#need smth for bellum and linebeck to do other than play a weird dating sim with each other as their endgame picks#honestly the actual plot side of things is the messiest fucking thing abt this and im trying to keep it from getting out of hand#i have the actual romance set up well enough and i really ought to focus on the romance in chapter planning before trying to#string together a main plot between all of it yknow#salty talks#thinking more on it it might not even need to smth where theyre fully successful bc its like. idk. maybe they just want to do some stuff#cuz there is no world threatening thing (thats bellum's role.) so like no sages or pendants but maybe some fucking mcguffin#part of me thinks. oh. triforce! but thats uh. a lot. i might just leave the dungeon stuff as like. bellum wants him to clear them out as#as like possibly places for bellum to hide out in since he's afraid of being threatened and killed. like hes looking a smth like a base#i like that ig. cuz it could end up with them being like. hey i like being around this person that i think i have feelings for#oh. this might be good to use in development of romance too
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