#Also I like what happens if you try talking to them and have the Mastery Over Insects skill.

[maddymoreau]

You ever see a design so ugly it’s cute? Anyway-

[pimpnchips]

Needed Me 2

Part 2

Natasha x Wife!Reader

Warnings: angst, slight smut, blow!job, slightly mean!

nat.

Summary: heated arguments with Natasha

Authors Note: I’m sorry it took me so fucking long to finish this, I'm okay! but I had major writers block and I wanted to make it good for you guys. I also wanted to put the daughter in here more.

Lena swung her head in your direction, "Mommy I want this one," she whined. The rack of stuffed animals sat on display as your daughter complained about how much she wanted the pink bunny.

"No baby, you remember what mama said."

Last night, Natasha talked to lena about behaving properly. Now that she's getting older you can't keep babying her and supplying all her wants after a tantrum or fit.

So Natasha decided on no extra things outside of the store list for a month so she can learn that you won't be able to get everything she asks for even if she decides on throwing a fit.

"Lena, no means no," scowls natasha. Carrying Mateo in his car seat with her left hand, "Pick her up detka — let's go."

You couldn't help but bite your lip at Natasha's authority

Seeing her do what she does best turned you on in so many ways you couldn't explain. You couldn't stay upset with her no matter how hard you 'tried'.

Heading to your shared bedroom last night, Natasha had a way with her words, instead of hate sex you made love.

You missed her warmth and her touch but there's nothing you miss more than how sexy she looked taking care of her family.

Yes, your wife is a lot of things but you know how deeply she cares for the three of you and if you didn't.. you wouldn't have taken her back.

-

You sighed in frustration, "I'm not trying to upset you baby"

"I never said you did," she muttered, gathering the clothes and putting them into the drawer across from you.

Which was a lie, you knew she was upset because you disagreed with her thoughts of not putting lena into school right now.

You brushed your fingers through her red hair trying your best to comfort her, "I understand there's a risk baby but I want her to have a normal child hood"

Natasha chuckles in disbelief,

"You understand nothing."

You scoff, "Natasha? She's my kid too so what don't I understand?" You started walking across the other side of the room away from her.

"Please, humor me." You sat down in the chair next to the open window, your hands slapping your knee as you sat down.

A blank stare on her face caused you to raise an eyebrow, bouncing your leg impatiently waiting for an answer.

It wasn't surprising that you and Natasha got into an argument today, it was always bound to happen. Sooner or later.

"You do shit like this all the time," she mumbles under her breath, trying to make it hard for you to hear.

"Are you fucking kidding me, Natasha?"

Your wife clutches the shirt in hand, more frustration clouding her eyes as she stares at you. She clearly didn't have an explanation, only acting on impulse.

"Am I the one who forged our divorce? If anybody does stupid shit it's you not me." You protest, rubbing your fingers on your temple.

But there's something about crawling under Natasha's skin that pumps you up. Toying with her is what got you here, having two of her kids and married to her for seven years.

She ignores your directed comment, "There's too many risks."

"She's not attending school and that's final," Natasha grumbled, her head was filled with your nagging comments.

"Nat -" you tried to reason with her.

"Don't" She growls, snapping her eyes up at you.

Your mouth clicks shut, "Sorry," you mumble. She knows how well you respond when she gets pissed off.

Sometimes you can't believe the effect Natasha has on you.

She knows your weaknesses and has no problem showing her mastery over you. Something you craved over the past few months, something a certain someone couldn't give you.

You haven't told Natasha, you figured if she ever found out a another woman came around the house, she'll probably kill the girl.

She's too possessive of you to share you with anyone else. It'll tear her ego down, make her seem like she doesn't have control anymore.

—

"What do you know about banana bread, bunny?" Natasha laughs, hearing your daughter talk about how much she loved the taste of the dessert at the dinner table.

Lena giggles with a wide smile, "Miss Maximoff always makes some for me and mommy" she grins, picking up her last nugget eating it innocently.

Fear was written across your faces as you avoided contact with your wife. Natasha furrows her eyebrows at you, mouthing something you couldn't quite pick up on.

You stood up, "Let's put you to bed baby."

Natasha stared daggers at you, continuing to watch you walk away but you tried your best to not turn around.

The anticipation of waiting for you to get back sent nat over the edge causing her to throw everything off her desk.

"Fuck!" she screamed.

You heard nat scream through the door as your hand hovered over the door nob. You took a short breath to get yourself together before entering.

The door shut behind you, Natasha turned around instantly averting all of her attention to you.

"Natasha"

Before you could finish your sentence, she already had her hand wrapped around your neck causing you to inhale shakily, "Please baby."

Your wife clenched her jaw, staring into your eyes making you feel small under her grasp.

"Did she fuck you?" For a moment you saw her eyes darken, her hands starting to grip tighter forcing you to answer her question with a quivering voice, "No"

She released her hand, slamming it on the wall beside you, "Don't fucking lie to me!"

Your eyes welled up with tears and your body shook at the sudden movement she made. You and Wanda didn't have anything special she was nice but she was too nice for you.

You needed something stronger, you wanted Natasha hence why you never went further than a kiss on the cheek. But in this moment something clicked in you.

You needed her.

You looked up at the red head, moving down onto your knees. You wanted Natasha to know that you were hers and no one else's.

"Get up," she gritted.

Ignoring her statement you unbuttoned her pants pulling it lower until her underwear came off. Her dick sprung free ready to be sucked by you.

After a long pause, she moved forward grabbing your head forcing her cock into your mouth. Your tongue sliding along her length as you bobbed your head up and down. She groaned, holding onto the wall, "She could never fill you up like this" she said between pants.

You locked eyes with your wife who was watching you with pure lust in her gaze. Natasha cleared her throat, cock twitching from her own thoughts.

"You don't deserve my cock, detka."

She smiles at the whimpers that escaped you. Her hips started to move and you moaned.

"You shouldn't be sucking dick like a slutty little whore"

Tearing your gaze away from the cock, which was dripping with pre cum, you stared straight into her piercing orbs.

"We didn't have sex, Natty." You whispered, voice mildly hoarse already.

Natasha's face was flushed, cock weeping precum still.

She hadn't realized how close she was to coming until you stopped. "I know.you wouldn't do that to me," was all she uttered as you moved to take her again.

Natasha groaned, every word dying on her lips as your mouth was back on her cock. "Oh...just like that detka... fuck your mouth takes me so well..." You glanced upwards, watching her throat bob as she tilted her head completely back. A low, husky moan left her lips as you swallowed.

The sound of your daughter's voice from down the hall made you pull back. Saliva and cum dripping down your face as Natasha groaned at the sight, painting your face with her milk-white cum.

She forced your mouth open with her hand, releasing the rest of her cum into your mouth. Seeing you drop to your knees for her and pleasing her needs without asking made her proud. It made her thirst for you more.

You quickly got off your knees in a hurry, rolling your eyes at your crazed wife for making a mess of your face while trying to get up.

"Put your dick in your pants before your daughter comes in here" you whispered by her ear, a demanding tone that surprised natasha.

Quickly walking to the bathroom to clean your face, the sound of your daughter's voice getting closer to the room startled Natasha as she buckled up her pants.

"Mama, where's mommy? I can't sleep" Her hair was all over her head, fingers rubbing her tired eyes.

You shouted from the bathroom, "Mommy's coming baby!"

You threw your face towel down, walking out of the bathroom being met with Natasha sitting on the bed with the little girl tracing her tattoos, her head on her mama's chest.

Lena looked up with a smile making your heartmelt at the sight. "Why was mama screaming earlier?" She questioned, tilting her head.

Natasha bursted into laughter, you quickly sent her a pointed look causing her to quiet down. You sighed at your daughters question, "Nothing love, I was helping her with something"

Lena was even more confused than before, it was written all over her face but she shrugged her shoulders letting it go.

Nat smiled at her confusions, leaning down to kiss the temple of her head.

You smiled at the interaction it made you realize no matter the fights or arguments you and Natasha will have she'll forever be here to love you and the kids.

And you'll always love Natasha.

Even if that meant you needed her more than she needed you.

Needed Me

Tags:

@starfire1008@viosblog112@dvrkhcld@ciao00000111 @ddreader04@twentyonetornmyheart @pancakefan7529@widowstingsposts @rosea-reginae @coxlong

[meanbossart]

I’m not sure how to ask this but who initiated the… ahem, **slayer screwing** activities between the two? Like what was that initial conversation like, if they even talked about it at all lol

Slayer-Layin' as the scholars call it is likely something that started and ended during the "honeymoon phase" of the Bhaalist DU drow timeline. That is the only iteration of him that gets the slayer-form, and I think what happened is that in the same way they were drunk in the power, control, riches and fashions of their newly-found position, the Slayer form also became this novelty and symbol of DU drow's status, representative of his power; and, at least then, Astarion would have found that attractive, not for what it is but for what it symbolizes. He may have wished for that power for himself, but in avail of it this will do. I don't think he would have engaged with the Slayer form otherwise.

So, at some point, DU drow shows off his new form to him. He does it not so differently from how he might gift him with jewels or fine clothes - a surprise awaiting for him in their private quarters, so he can enjoy his reaction away from prying eyes. And much like the garments and gems, he wants Astarion to touch them, feel how smooth and soft they are under his fingers, try them on, give them a spin.

In his Slayer form, DU drow would have insisted on his curiosity, aimed for familiarity. Touch whatever you want, stare for however long you like, watch me flick your curls and embrace you with the exact same level of tenderness I would were I down a pair of arms. He watches his grin turn into shocked laughs and eyes dart wildly trying to take in all of him. The more comfortable they get, the more he begins to touch back.

And I think it's the absurdity of it that has Astarion engaged and wondering how far this can go, as well as amazement. He still loves DU drow at this point (I guess he always will, though in this version of the story this feelings change over time) and as upset as he may be about remaining a spawn, shouldn't he count himself lucky to be Bhaal's favorite Favorite? To wield such a fearsome beast in whatever shape it takes with so much mastery, even under circumstances this intimate? Gods, but isn't he magnificent, really? Isn't he a sight yo behold? One that makes you want to drop to your knees?

It's a little bit of control, it's a little bit of genuine adoration, it's a little big of "well, when in rome"

[wangxianficrecs]

💙 Caught in 4k by KizuKatana

🔒💙 Caught in 4k

by KizuKatana (@kizukatana)

E, Series, WIP, 184k, Wangxian

Summary: A night-hunt goes wrong, and Wei Wuxian is scapegoated for the death of the Jiang Sect Leader and the destroyed core of the Jiang Sect Heir. As punishment, his core is taken and given to Jiang Cheng, and he is stripped of his cultivation credentials and expelled from the sect. What everyone forgot was that Wei Wuxian was wearing the standard issue body camera that each cultivator wore on training missions and high-risk night-hunts. Struggling to make ends meet, Wei Wuxian finds his way to Caiyi Town with the doctor who performed the surgery, a partial core still secretly in place. His application to work at Cloud Recesses is summarily rejected by the hard-edged Second Jade of Lan after an unfortunate initial encounter. But things change when someone hacks into the Jiang systems and releases the footage of what happened. Kay's comments: The series is still a WIP, but the main story is complete! I am so weak for Kizu's modern AUs with cultivation, they are great. Especially the world building and how the cultivation society might function in a modern AU shines in this story. Definitely not a story for fans of the Jiang family, but a story for everyone who wants to see some retribution for the things Wei Wuxian went through. Here, Jiang Fengmian dies during a night-hunt accident where Jiang Cheng's golden core gets destroyed and Madam Yu makes Wei Wuxian give his golden core to him, unfortunately for her, his body-cam is still filming everything. Wei Wuxian finds himself taken in by Wen Qing and her family and we get the sweetest found family and Dadxian vibes here and then meets Lan Wangji as well, who's highly judgemental at first but soon finds himself drawn to Wei Wuxian as well. This story really got it all, the drama, the horny, the softness, the restitution & humor. Excerpt: Still Wei Wuxian forced himself to at least try one last time. “You could also interview me. Have me talk to your best talisman experts,” Wei Wuxian said, forcing himself to keep the desperation out of his voice. “Interviews are scheduled based on receipt of proper credentials and references.” “I don’t have any, at least not right now. But that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t be a great teacher.” “No references, no interview.” “Come on. Look, ask me anything about talismans. You’re an experienced cultivator, right? So you must know enough to at least interview me to see if I know what I’m talking about.” “Simply ‘knowing about something’ is not sufficient. Our lecturers are renown cultivators, and masters in their fields. No references, no interview.” Wei Wuxian felt frustration well up in him, especially at the reminder that Lan Wangji didn’t see him as a cultivator. No one would, in his current condition. Why would they? He didn’t have a functional core, which was the main scale against which all cultivation efforts were measured. He thought he had done a good job of not getting his hopes up about the teaching position, but the suffocating feeling constricting his chest was calling him out for being a liar. He should have known better. Why did he never learn? Some people had luck on their said, but Wei Wuxian had never been one of them. “Right. Of course. Because it would be impossible for someone who wasn’t born to the fucking clan nobility to ever actually be good at something, and the cost of taking the mastery test makes sure that other people can’t do it!” Lan Wangji’s lips parted slightly, like he might say something, but his expression was as opaque and emotionless as before. Wei Wuxian didn’t need to sit around and listen to him defend the clan system. “Good to know that the Lan are just the same as all the other sects,” Wei Wuxian continued, his lips twisting into a sarcastic smile. “Thanks for making that clear.”

pov alternating, modern setting, modern with magic, yu ziyuan being an asshole, dysfunctional jiang family, jiang family bashing, canon divergence, golden core reveal, burial mounds ensemble as family, golden core transfer, golden core transfer fix-it, top lan wangji/bottom wei wuxian, dual cultivation, strangers to lovers, misunderstandings, meet ugly, families of choice, hurt/comfort, emotional hurt/comfort

~*~

(Please REBLOG as a signal boost for this hard-working author if you like – or think others might like – this story.)

[fsfghgee]

If Sektor and Bi-Han really were a couple, what HCS do you have for them? Honestly, if they were a couple someday, I wouldn't mind. After all, it's a new universe and some things had to change ^^

....

When Bi-Han first saw Sektor, he was enchanted by her fighting skills and beauty. She had the skills and swing of an experienced warrior, but the delicate face and gaze of an apprentice hungry for knowledge.

Always around his older brother, Kuai Liang noticed when Bi-Han acquired the habit of not only watching the training of warriors with their father, but also for keep looking for a specific female warrior.

Bi-Han spent months just watching Sektor from afar and not even knowing her name, he began to dream about her and wish more and more to be able to talk to her. Bi-Han wasn't a coward, but he felt like one whenever he tried to get close to her.

As a future Grandmaster, most people treated him like a prince, unintentionally isolating him from most people in the clan (especially the lower ranking ones), and his demanding training schedule in diverse areas made Bi-Han had little time to even try to get close to her.

On the day the Grandmaster was too busy to choose the weapon that Tomas would use in his fighting practices, but wishing to congratulate him on his newly acquired mastery of typhomancy, he assigned Bi-Han and Kuai Liang to go to the nearest master armorer to buy a blade. That day Bi-Han exchanged words with Sektor for the first time and as he left the place he longed to hear her voice again.

In the days that followed, Bi-Han would sneak out of training to visit Sektor's family workshop. Making excuses about acquiring more knowledge about weapons and buying more weapons that he wouldn't even use because he made his own weapons with cryomancy, he got to know Sektor better and the connection he felt with her, a connection that grew every single day mixed with the desire to have her close at any time, made him question if he was suffering from the same weakness as his younger brother.

On a night, when Kuai Liang and Bi-Han returned early from a visit to Liu Kang, their father had stayed behind to continue dealing with more serious matters with the god, Kuai Liang talked non-stop about Harumi to Bi-Han and how he wanted to visit her again when he was surprised that his older brother showed interest in the subject instead of just listening in silence with a bored look. Bi-Han asked how it was… How he knew she was the one… Kuai Liang explained how he thought about Harumi constantly, how he missed her when he was away from her, how the time seemed to fly by when they were together, how she always understood him and how he felt at home just being in her presence.

Sektor enjoyed Bi-Han's company and he attracted her like no other ever could. Her father advised her about her entanglement with the heir and how she should be more cautious. After all, he was still the heir to the clan's leadership position. The responsibilities that weighed on Bi-Han's shoulders were beyond her knowledge.

When they kissed for the first time, it had been Bi-Han's first kiss to Sek's surprise. She took his lip virginity and he blushed in a way she never imagined a cryomancer could do.

A few days after Bi-Han had confessed his feelings for her, Sektor began to hear talk about how something must have happened to the Ice Prince because he no longer accompanied his father on visits to the warriors' training sessions and that everything indicated that he had been sent to a distant sub-clan for training. She cried for three days because he had left without saying goodbye and could barely eat without her father's encouragement.

When his relationship with the daughter of a master armorer reached his father's ears, along with his constant absences and delays for his daily lessons, he punished him. Sending him away and only allowing him to return after he swore by his mother's spirit that he would never see the armorer's daughter again. Constantly reminding him of how unworthy he still was of his position and that if he disobeyed his orders again he would punish Sektor's family, Bi-Han complied with his father's orders without a second thought.

Sektor got to know Bi-Han's cold side when she managed to get close to him one day, eager to talk to him and find out how he was doing after not seeing him for so long. He broke her heart that day and he wept over it in a way he had only did the night he learned of his mother's death.

Not expecting his father to ever approve of Sektor, especially since the marriage talks before he took over as grandmaster continued in discussions without any real interest in his opinion, Bi-Han knew the moment his father had that accident that he would have to let him die if he wanted to be happy one day. His father was too strong and stubborn to ever change his mind or die naturally.

After all the honors were done, warnings sent, matters to be finalized finally concluded, Bi-Han took over as Grandmaster and looked for her. After so many years of avoiding her, it was expected that Sektor would reject him and Bi-Han would accept, but after explaining why he did what he did, she accepted him back. As if they had never been apart, she loved him even more. Recognizing all the sacrifices he had made so that they could be together.

Bi-Han named Sektor second in command of the Lin Kuei and reminded her of the dreams and plans they had made together before he was forced to leave her, she agreed to help him in his efforts to make them all come true immediately.

Sektor was not pleased to learn that Bi-Han had known her apprentice for a long time, since the Zaki clan, one of the many Lin Kuei sub-clans scattered in Earthrealm, was where Bi-Han was sent when he was punished.

Sektor used to be very jealous of Bi-Han's relationship with Frost to the point that she couldn't hide her annoyance when Bi-Han talked about his apprentice, but over time, after hearing from Bi-Han many times that she was like a little sister to him and that his intentions towards her were the same as hers towards her apprentice, Cyrax, she began to treat Frost in a less unfriendly manner.

Sektor used to feel jealous of Bi-Han with Cyrax when she watched them doing anything together due to the friendship they cultivated, but her trust in her apprentice and Bi-Han made her hold her tongue. Although she still can't help but feel jealous of seeing him near Cyrax, even if it's just to lecture her.

In any argument, even when it comes to the future of the clan, the one who has the last word is Sektor.

What Bi-Han loves most about Sektor is her quick thinking, her understanding, her confidence, her loyalty, her genius, her ingenuity, her affection and her combat skills.

What Sektor loves most about Bi-Han is his confidence, his determination, his open-mindedness, his generosity towards the clan, his concern, his strength, his puns and his combat skills.

Though they are cold and ruthless to their enemies, they value those who are loyal to them above all else. Sektor knows he would kill and die for her, and Bi-Han knows she would do the same for him.

When they first met, Sektor withheld her birth name and gave him her codename; Bi-Han calls her Sektor more than by her real name to this day.

Sektor never calls him Sub-Zero or Grandmaster. But she demands that Cyrax and Frost call him Grandmaster always.

.....

[alexanderwales]

Pitchposting: The Waves

Here's the logline: a hero flits between universes where everything is different and yet all characters recur. The love interest is the same, whether she's a pirate captain, a cubicle worker, a bard, whatever. The villain is the same, whether he's a rear admiral, a corporate tyrant, or an evil overlord.

Multiverse stories are often about the path not traveled, the way that the world might be different. This would be a story about commonality, everything staying the same.

So there are some number of stories being told here, and the shape of all of them is exactly identical, all hitting the beats at the same time. A death in one means a death in the other, but our protagonist is only in one place at a time, so we see each beat only once and infer the rest. A car chase in one story is a ship chase in another. The climactic battle where soldiers crash against the castle walls becomes a climactic battle where the pirate horde smashes against the walls of a fort, and that turns into a modern cityscape where rioters smash against the walls of a towering skyscraper.

My vision here is that we do grand changes as we move between stories, only to find that everything is equivalent.

So what do you do with this? What's this sort of structure for? What cool stories or scenes does it lend itself to?

My first thought is to break it, naturally. If there are five or six realities that we're cycling through, maybe our protagonist can get just one of them onto a different track, one where fate has something else in store. I don't know how you would do this, there's this neat scene in my head where we go "all is lost -> all is lost -> all is lost -> all is ... wait, what's that?!".

My second thought is that having multiple realities moving in perfect synchronicity with each other allows for a way to really underscore a character, say something about them with thick red marker. The elemental thing that's supposed to define a tragedy is that the bad ending is something that came from within the character, right? Something that they could have stopped, if only they had been a different kind of person. The seeds of their downfall laying within them. So isn't there something nice about seeing that this is invariant? That the worlds are different, circumstances are different, but the choices are the same? You'd have to be incredibly careful with this (and the whole thing, really), because I think in constructing different parallels you might end up with something that the audience doesn't consider parallel. But it could work, layering the emotional beats on top of each other.

My third thought is what I think should have been my first thought: the story is one about mastery, coming to know and understand the rules, "winning" across all realities because of understanding, ideally with some kind of character synthesis along the way. I think this is ... well, difficult, given the rules as I've been talking about them. If there's a "twist", then it should be a twist that happens across all realities simultaneously. If there's something gained or lost, it should always have a parallel. I cannot immediately think of some clever way of breaking this system - something that the reader would understand to be clever or at least worthwhile. (I say reader, but this would be better in a visual medium.) Maybe "breaking it" in a different way is the ideal, pulling the realities into each other, swapping conceits and genres. But this, too, would take a lot of planning to pull off, and you'd need to be careful about these set pieces.

So if I were serious about this (which I'm not, this is pitchposting,) I would start out with our characters, then build some worlds around them, trying for maximum variation in those worlds. The plotting is also pretty vital, particularly the "standard" plot whether you're going to break that or not. I do really like the idea of having a single "mundane" world, a place of office buildings and stakes that are measured in lunch breaks and water cooler conversations. I want the swings to be extreme, but the parallels blindingly obvious when they're put in front of you.

To be clear, I'm not sure that this structure/gimmick could actually work. In a text medium, which is what I primarily work with, I think you'd have to spend too much time on blocking and descriptions and detail whenever you switched realities. Switching scenes can be rough even in the best of circumstances.

But it's an idea that I've had rolling around in my head, and if I can't do something with it, then I hope it can at least spark something in someone else.

[scarred-but-still-smiling]

Jay's Odyssey (chapter 1 of 2)

Jorge only knows one way to get to the underworld without dying, and for that he needs to visit Circe. But without any Moly, he'll have to hope the presence of Athena will be convincing enough.

An epilogue that became a sequel, because there's a good few things I wanna explore.

Read here on AO3

"So, Jorge Rivera-Herrans of the future, what were those changes you refused to talk about in the palace?"

Jay looked over at Athena, stood to the rear of the ship, the stern he vaguely recalled. They had been at sea for around half an hour, with Athena teaching him how to actually sail, since he had very little experience compared to the men he knew she was used to sailing with.

"From what you said, I can gather it was something that would affect the relationship of Odysseus and Penelope, but I also gather there's a bigger secret you're hiding."

He sighed, "Well, you're not wrong." He glanced at the sail, thankfully the wind was still favourable, and he wouldn't have to start rowing any time soon. "For that specific detail I was referring to, in the original tale, the first one recorded, Odysseus did sleep with both Circe and Calypso." He caught Athena's shocked expression, "but!" he interjected, "in both scenarios, he didn't want to. Circe had threatened his men's safety, and Calypso had worn him down over years in isolation with her." He ran a hand through his hair, "in my time, that is not considered cheating, but I had to operate under the assumption that I was talking to the Odysseus from the original telling of The Odyssey. That Odysseus was far less kind. Still a loving husband and father, but also that Odysseus had his maids hanged for unfaithfulness because they were assaulted by the suitors. I needed to operate under the assumption that was the Odysseus I was talking to, I didn't want him to think he had cheated on Penelope because he was assaulted by these women."

He saw Athena's expression soften, "I am truly glad that that was not how things truly transpired."

"That's the other thing," Jorge said, smiling a little sadly, "the big secret you sensed. The truth is, in my time, there is no evidence that any of the things in those 20 years ever happened." He looked away from Athena and at the ocean beneath them, unable to meet her gaze, "as far as the historical record is concerned, there never was a King Odysseus of Ithaca."

He heard Athena gasp, "So, you weren't being metaphorical when you called all this a story, were you?"

"Unfortunately, no. Mastery of time alone might not be enough."

"Well, it's a good thing you're friends with the god of travellers, isn't it, darling~"

Jay froze; it couldn't be. How could this be possible? He turned in the direction of the irritatingly familiar voice, "Hermes?!"

And there he was, the exact Hermes he'd been trying to avoid for so long; fur coat, sunglasses, the works, laughing that unmistakable laugh, the wings on his bedazzled Docs fluttering as he chased their little boat.

"You know, you gave Talya and your parents a right scare disappearing like that, my dear," The god teased, flying a ring around him, "you should have seen them, your poor mother nearly fainted."

He'd been worried about that, "Hermes, what happened?"

"What happened after you got poofed, or how did the poofing happen? Because I can tell you both."

"You know how Jorge got here?"

"God of travellers, my dear Athena, of course I do."

"No, that can wait, how are they? Are they okay?" This wasn't a fear Jay ever expected to feel; that nauseating pit in his stomach, knowing that something very real could have happened to his parents, to Talya, to the rest of his friends, and he wasn't there to protect or help them.

Was this how Odysseus had felt?

"Well, luckily for you both, those two things are somewhat connected." Hermes explained, "but you've got a very long journey ahead of you. One might even call it an Odyssey~"

Jay's heart sank, he'd expected as much what with how much food Penelope had sent them off with, "How long?"

"Well, if the winds and tides are feeling merciful, around 10 days at the very least." Hermes flew in a loop happily, "and unfortunately there's nothing even I can do about that. That's just the way the geography works out, I'm afraid."

"You seem far too cheerful about this, brother." Athena said, annoyed, her brow furrowed.

Jay let out a short, sardonic laugh, "oh trust me, he's always like this." He pinched the bridge of his nose, "Hermes, if you managed to find me here, however the hell that was, I'm gonna assume you can make the return trip. Is that correct?"

"Not with a passenger, but I can, yes."

"Well then, can you at least pop back and inform the others that I'm fine and that I didn't..." he gestured in an upwards motion, "evaporate? I'm not sure if I'll be able to return to the exact time and place I left, so I want them to have some reassurance in the meantime."

"Of course, darling. But first," Hermes pulled what Jay immediately recognized as Troy's phone out of one of the pockets of his fur coat, "I want to get a selfie with you and Athena. Partly for bragging rights, and partly to stop your mother worrying herself into joining my darling granddaughter in the underworld."

"Don't even joke about that." Jay growled, glaring at the trickster god. But still he walked to the back of the ship to stand next to Athena. "You sure she's gonna show up in that?"

"I mean, I do, so I don't see why she wouldn't" Hermes fluttered down beside them and held out the phone on the end of his caduceus, one of the coiled serpents lifting its head in readiness to take the photo. "Say cheese, darlings~"

"What-?" Athena tried to interject, but before she could say anything else, the phone made its shutter sound and Hermes had already returned it to his pocket.

Hermes laughed, flying loops again in glee, "Don't worry, darling, Jay can explain everything over the next week and change." The god winked at Jay, and he could feel the tips of his ears redden again, as they had meeting Penelope. "I'll hopefully be back before you reach Circe, but who knows how much help your friends will need now they've awakened those powers~"

"Wait, powers?! Hermes, what-?" but before he could ask anything, Hermes had disappeared in a burst of sparkles.

"From your reaction, I take it that's not normal for mortals where you're from?"

"Not at all," he replied, "but, given the context of everything that's happened today, I do have a theory. I'll just have to wait until Hermes gets back to ask him about it."

By now, the sun was beginning to set on Jay's first day in Ancient Greece. As he watched the golden light of sunset dance on the waves, he began to think about what kind of legacy he would leave behind when his time finally came. He wondered if the mark he'd made with Epic would outlive him, if he'd accomplish something even greater in his life that would live even longer. He thought about Talya and the life they had ahead of them once he found his way home. He tried not to think about the very real possibility that he wouldn't.

Athena sat beside him, handing him some bread, smoked meat and cheese, "Here," she said softly, "don't worry about me, gods don't need to eat or sleep, so just focus on yourself."

Jay accepted, and began to eat. He hadn't noticed he was even hungry, what with how chaotic the day had been. "Thanks," he said, between bites, "for everything you've done for me so far."

Athena leaned her head against the side of the ship, gazing up at the slowly appearing stars, "You're worried you won't get home, aren't you? It makes logical sense, but you forget that traders make journeys such as these all the time. You look enough like Odysseus that Poseidon wouldn't dare harass you, and if any harpies or the like try anything you have me to protect you, and even weapons of your own." She turned her head to look at him, "I won't fail you like I did Odysseus, you have my word."

The two sat in silence as Jay ate, and for a while after, as he watched the stars twinkling above them. He'd never seen the night sky like this before, he didn't think it was even possible with all the light pollution in the modern day, so now, gazing up at the glorious arc of the Milky Way, he truly understood why so many cultures looked up at night and saw gods.

The next thing he knew, he was waking up to the late morning sun in his face, a woollen blanket draped over him, and Athena keeping watch at the bow of the vessel. He groaned, sitting up and stretching, trying to get the horrid stiffness from his joints caused from sleeping on the plain wooden floor of the boat.

Athena glanced over, alerted by his noises of protestation, and smiled kindly, "First time sleeping on something other than a bed?" she guessed, "I doubt this is something that would still happen in your time."

"First time in a while, yea." he replied, "people do still sometimes choose to sleep rough, when they go camping for instance." He looked around, "has Hermes returned yet?"

"Not yet, no." Athena moved along the perimeter of the boat, her eyes on the horizon, "how do you know each other, if I may ask?"

Jay smiled, "Honestly? He just sort of... arrived?" He shrugged. "Like, I had put out a casting call for the character of Hermes, and as soon as I had cast Troy, Hermes just Showed Up. He stuck around until a little bit after the release of the Circe Saga, gave me some weird life advice, and then kinda fucked off." He stood up, stretching out his legs, "according to Troy, he'd been living with him for a while after that, and then once I had announced the Vengeance Saga he, once again, broke into my house to annoy me." He sighed, "Honestly, though? I'd never say it to his face, but I do like him. His enthusiasm is contagious, and with the world the way it is in my time, that's a very valuable kinda friend to have."

Athena frowned, "Back at the palace, you said-"

"I know. The world is still much kinder than the world you and Odysseus know, but unfortunately some of those inevitable monsters have found themselves in positions of power, and they're making it everyone else's problem."

"So tyrants are still a problem, even near 3000 years in the future."

"Sadly, yeah. But we manage." Jorge wandered over to the small hut where the food was stored and grabbed an apple, "the systems we have in place in the future aren't perfect, but it's definately better than divine right of kings." Picking up another, he made to toss it to Athena, but then a thought occured to him. "would offering you this apple make Aphrodite mad? Last time a goddess was offered an apple, the Trojan War happened, and I do not need that right now."

Athena laughed brightly, "Jorge, I'm flattered, but no; that was a very specific apple with a very specific purpose."

Jay tossed the second apple over, which Athena gratefully caught. Biting into his own, he was immediately struck by how sweet the apples he was used to must be. It wasn't unplesant, just not what he was expecting.

The pair ate their apples in silence, eyes on the horizon at each side of the boat, watching for danger or stormclouds. After a while, he heard Athena speak up in query.

"How much has changed of the world? What knowledge is there that those who live today will never know?"

Jay laughed, turning to face her, "More than even I know, my friend. There are whole landmasses you might not know about, and that's not even touching the advances in technology." He gestured to the sky, "like, did you know that mankind will one day walk on the moon?"

Athena gasped loudly, her eyes going wide, "really? Does man live there?"

"Not yet, only a few people have ever actually walked on the moon so far, it's a very complex and expensive process to get people there, one I'm not entirely sure about, but I do know it involves a lot of fire and explosions."

"What about the oceans? If man has reached the stars, surely the ocean would be child's play."

"That's the funny thing," Jay said, gazing out over the water, "we actually know more about things beyond the sky than we do about the depths of the ocean. The problem with the ocean is that water is heavy, and it's difficult to make things that won't get crushed down there." he shrugged, "for all we know, Poseidon himself might be chilling out at the bottom of the Marianas Trench and we'd be none the wiser."

They spent the next few hours like that, Athena asking questions about the modern day, and Jay doing his best to answer. She was especially amused by electricity, and how mankind had harnessed it.

"So you're saying that man will one day learn to take the power of my father and control it for themselves?" She leaned forward where she sat, eyes shining and eager, "and they use it for entertainment? Not even for warfare?"

"Oh it has its role in war, electricity is at the center of everything modern man uses, but it's not used as a weapon directly, no." He pulled out his phone, Hermes and his selfie the previous day had reminded him he still had it on him, "this is a cellphone, one of the most common means of communication in my time; it, in combination with something called the internet, I'll get to that later, can allow a person to talk with someone on the other side of the planet."

"Oh, that's the strange tablet Hermes had yesterday. So it can do more than capture images?"

"It can do almost anything," he replied, "but a lot of it requires connection to a network of hubs called the internet, so I can't really demonstrate right now." He returned his phone to his pocket carefully, the last thing he wanted was to lose it in the ocean of an Ancient Greece that technically didn't exist.

"So this Internet, is that how you told your story of this world?"

"That's right, it's how I found most of the singers to play the different characters, and how I shared the story."

"You say most."

"A couple were my parents; my mother sang for the moment when Odysseus saw his own mother in the underworld, and you actually likely know what my father sounds like as he sang for Hephaestus. The other major character I didn't need the internet to find a voice for was actually the woman we're going to see; Circe's voice was provided by my girlfriend." He paused, realising what that likely meant. "Which means she probably looks like Talya, which is definitely gonna feel a little odd."

The conversation continued, hours passing by, Jorge teaching Athena things about his time, and Athena teaching him about hers, until the sun began to sink in the west. He looked around, puzzled and slightly concerned. "Still no sign of Hermes. Normally I'd appreciate that, but given the circumstances, I'm starting to worry about what's keeping him so long."

"Maybe access to his powers are somewhat limited in your time, given that magic doesn't exist there." Athena posited, "Perhaps that's what's delaying him."

"That or he got distracted." Jay said with a smirk, "he does that a lot."

"You know what? That makes sense for him." Athena agreed.

Trying not to think about it, Jorge decided to put together a meal before he called it a night; some figs, some cheese, what looked like crackers, a veritable charcuterie board of decadance. If he was gonna spend 10 days at sea, he supposed having rations supplied by royalty would definitely keep morale up.

He woke early the next morning, the second real day of travel, to a familiar laughter. He rolled over, shielding his eyes from the morning sun, "G'morning Hermes, what kept you?"

"Well aside from trying to convince your friends not to take advantage of having access to divine power, which, I never thought I'd ever have to be the buzzkill but if they got in trouble they'd probably get kicked out of Ithaca, and who knows if you'd ever be able to see them again if that happened." Hermes pulled something out of his coat, "you know, for being an island, it's surprisingly hard to find fishing supplies in modern Ithaca."

Jay smiled, "Okay, remind me to pay back whoever bought that fishing rod for you, okay Hermes?"

"Bought?"

The smile dropped from Jay's face like a sack of rocks, "Hermes, you did buy this, right? Also, we're gonna need to circle back to that first bit right quick when we're done with this, man."

Hermes laughed again, handing the rod over, "Oh don't worry darling, I made sure to leave a couple drachma on the counter as I left. I already told you, I don't want your little friends getting in trouble before you can get home, and given that Troy is divinely blessed to look exactly like me, stealing anything would definitely be counter to what's best in this situation."

"Okay, thank you, though that's still not legal tender so I'm not sure how much it's gonna help." Jay took the rod and sighed, "but can we talk about that other thing? Please? Why would them leaving Ithaca mean I might not be able to get home? How did I even get here in the first place? Athena initially thought it's because time is thinner in the palace, but what do my friends have to do with that? And where do powers come into it?" His breathing quickened, he knew his parents would never willingly leave the island until he was back, but if they didn't have any choice, could he be stranded here?

Seemingly noticing his panic, Hermes came down and stood on the deck, jubilant smile falling, "Okay, from what I can tell, the thinning in time wasn't the only factor, given that technically we don't exist in your world. The thinning was just the presense of a door, the key to that door is you. Specifically, the heart and soul you put into Epic. That's why your friends are keys too; there's a part of their souls in this world as well, meaning that, as long as they remain in proximity to the palace ruins, that door is able to be opened again."

Jorge nodded, that all but confirmed his hypothesis. "That's why powers manifested, isn't it?"

Hermes giggled, "You should have seen it darling, Luke was about run through the archway after you, and Earle, in a panic, threw out his hand like ''WAIT!'' and accidentally used Quick Thought on him, which, because it was Ares' Quick Thought, made Luke mad, which wasn't exactly ideal, because it seems like those powers are triggered by heightened emotion, and since Luke is connected to dear old dad, a thunderstorm immediately started forming overhead, and lightning very nearly struck Earle. He would've been completely fried if Troy hadn't used my speed to tackle him before the lightning hit the ground."

Jay staggered back a couple of steps, the realisation that one of his friends nearly died hitting him like a tidal wave. "Are they okay? Were they able to calm Luke down before anyone got hurt?"

"Have you ever been bitchslapped by a blacksmith?" Hermes asked, a grin on his face, "because your father was not about to let an angry demigod get in the way of getting his little boy back. In fact, it was his idea for Troy to call me. He slapped Luke across the face and was like, ''this foolishness will do nothing to find Jorge. Troy, see if you can call that Hermes guy; Jay says he's the god of travellers so if anyone can find my boy, it's gonna be him.'' and Troy was like ''Oh Hermes, we need your help, please help us!'' and then I made myself visible behind him and scared him."

Running the list through his mind, a thought occurred to him that made him sick to his stomach, "Hermes," he ventured, voice trembling, "is mom okay?" Anticlea was a ghost, a spirit of the departed, and if his friends were taking on aspects of the characters they played...

"Oh's she's fine, don't worry." Hermes reassured him kindly, "it's only the supernatural that decided to manifest as far as I can tell, and there's little more natural than a spirit in the underworld."

Jay sighed in relief. "Oh thank god."

"Mason, however..."

His blood turned to ice in his veins, as if he could get any more afraid, "Hermes," he said, his voice as low as it had been when recording Odysseus, "what happened to Mason?"

"Well, for one thing, he's stone blind."

"And that's only one thing!?"

"And for another, your friends aren't gonna be seeing you in the next 24 hours for them, at the very least."

"How do you know that?" At least Mason wasn't fading away, at least he was still alive.

"As well as the blindness, he did get a slightly weaker version of the futuresight Tireseas has; only 24 hours and only that specific version of reality."

"He's not gonna stay blind, though, right? You said the powers seem to be triggered by heightened emotion, so all he needs to do is calm down, right?"

"That's easier said than done, I'm afraid." Hermes said sadly, "try being calm when you just watched a friend vanish into thin air, another friend almost get struck by lightning, and then learn that the friend that vanished is stuck nearly 3000 years in the past. It's likely that he's gonna stay like that until you get home."

Jay took a deep breath, there was good news in what Hermes was implying; time seemed to move differently between him and his friends back home. Since Hermes couldn't technically travel through time, since, again, the story he was trapped in was entirely fictional, it appeared that only a few hours had passed for them at most over the last 2 and a half days. If he was right, the remaining 8 days would equal a little under a day for them, and then with the added day or two required to reach the cave to the underworld, that should line up with Mason's prophecy.

But, then again... Athena did say that time can be malliable...

"Hermes?" he ventured, "can you swim?"

Athena looked at him curiously, "are you thinking about what I think you're thinking about?"

"If you think I'm thinking about a god powered speedboat, then yes."

"That would definitely cut down on how long it takes to get to Circe, since the biggest hindrance is how slow vessels like these are."

"Absolutely not, darling." Hermes complained, leaning up against the mast, "this outfit is dry-clean only."

Jay glared daggers into Hermes, a burning fury welling up inside him, but then a thought occured to him, and he smiled coldly. He picked up the bow he'd been gifted, and retrieved an arrow, noting the slight magical shimmering on its head. As he drew it back, he turned and aimed at Hermes, time seeming to slow as he did so, a faint ticking at the very edge of his perception, and a familiar sound in his ears.

He fired.

Before Hermes had time to react, there was a wet thunking sound, and the god had been pinned to the mast.

Jay set down the bow and stalked towards the helpless Hermes, the ticking fading, "Athena, could you summon your spear for me? I need to borrow it."

Athena waved a hand and the spear appeared in his hand. "Jorge," she cautioned, "I hope you know what you're doing."

"J-Jay, darling," Hermes stammered, hands raised in surrender, "you don't need to do this."

Jay pointed the tip of the spear at Hermes' throat, pushing just hard enough to leave a thin rivulet of golden ichor trailing down the god's flesh. "Oh really?" he mused, "does that mean you've changed your mind?" his smile grew icy, "because that's the only way you're getting out of this without a few new holes."

"Yes, okay, I'll do it!" Hermes said hurriedly, and Jay could see genuine fear in the god's eyes. "I'll strip if I have to. Just don't hurt me. Think about what Talya would think!"

"You know, Hermes," Jay said, pulling the arrow from Hermes' torso, "I think she'd be fine. Because there's one thing about me that you seem to have forgotten about." He let the tension fall from his body, smiling cheekily. "I'm a goddamn actor."

He turned from Hermes and walked away, handing Athena her spear back.

Jay laughed, "Oh, not a chance. I told you; I'm no warrior. Plus the guy looks like my friend Troy, so even if I was, I wouldn't have been able to do it." He looked back to Hermes, "A deal's a deal, darling," he teased, "get out and push."

"Would you have actually done it?"

[burningcheese-merchant]

Use me as the ask to rant about the kid's Soul jams, pls. I need to know that lore and the reaction to the news.

Hahahahaha another hapless creature has fallen into my trap. Now you will endure my rambling. There is no escape.

Seriously though. I actually sat and mulled over how to answer you, because someone else also asked about the kids' Soul Jams and I don't want to copy-paste the exact same answers, you know? I don't want to do that for anyone I talk or reply to (that's partially why I take forever to answer asks lol, I want to give as complete, articulate and unique of responses as I can. I feel that's the least I owe you for being interested in me and my thoughts enough to want to ask me something)

Now that I answered the other one, I think I can answer yours with new information (that I may have deliberately withheld just so you can have something too haha)

Pepper Jack's Soul Jam is dark blue. Matar Paneer's is orange. (You'll know what hers is called when I drop her doodle, she's next)

I explained this already, but them gaining their own Soul Jams really was an accident. Neither Burning Spice nor Golden Cheese were actively trying to give them those. It turned out to be a natural consequence of their union, particularly because they own the two halves of the same Soul Jam and in creating these children, the halves "united" and became whole again like they were originally meant to, and in doing so, created something new. Blah blah true love blah blah destiny blah blah special blessing blah blah blah

Nobody knew this would happen until the kids were actually born. Besides them practically radiating that familiar aura that all the other Soul Jam wielders have, there are little things that give it away. Golden Cheese didn't always have wings, she was given them after acquiring the Soul Jam. Meanwhile, Jack actually was born with his. He inherited something that his mother technically doesn't truly have. Something she only got through the power she possesses...

The Soul Jams aren't... "there", so to speak. You can't touch them or hold them or anything. They're not stones that exist in the real world like the other Soul Jams do. When Spice and Golden gave them a bit of Soul Jam, it was the power itself they handed down, not the actual, physical thing. For Jack and Paneer, the Soul Jams are literally, unironically in their souls. The power is imbued in their souls and thus cannot be seen or touched, only sensed/felt (but if you look into their minds or souls, you can and will actually see them. Shadow Milk can when he peeks into their minds, for example. It's how he helped confirm that they exist in the first place). If you want to take their Soul Jams away, you have to take their souls themselves away. So they're infinitely harder to rob than their parents lol

They do not truly know how to use them for a while. They are blessed with great power, but learn to wield it and unlock its fullest potential as they grow older

Additional point to the above: you know how the Soul Jams seem semi-sentient? Remember how they "talk" to their owners? (Hollyberry's speaks to her during the princess contest arc, for example. Golden Cheese's also "says" things to her in Beast-Yeast episode 6, right before she awakens.) Jack's and Paneer's are like that, too. But they don't "hear" them for a while. Not until they unlock their full potential

They will not achieve true mastery over their Soul Jams until they are adults. And they only truly begin that journey after they are both pushed to their absolute limits. (Won't spoil what that is, I'll just say it's different for each of them. They are going to suffer, that's all you get for now lol)

Mentioned in a previous post that Golden was super duper tired while she was pregnant with both of them. Well, this is why lol. Carrying extremely powerful children, to whom you and your husband technically surrendered a portion of your own power in the process of creating them, takes a lot out of you physically

While they were given pieces of the Light of Abundance/Destruction, those pieces transformed into something entirely new and original to suit them specifically. The kids took the Soul Jams and made them their own

Think of Spice and Golden passing down their power to Jack and Paneer as like... how Pitaya Dragon granted Fire Spirit some of their power via their deal. Similar situation here. Hopefully that makes all this make more sense

Lot of excitement and nervousness from people all around when it came to light that two new Soul Jams were conjured from practically nothing lol. Now there are 12 Soul Jam wielders, not just 10. No one knows what these two are, what they can do, what powers they've bestowed upon the children. How dangerous they can really be. It's a great and terrible responsibility even for adults. These are literal children. They hold the might of gods before even knowing their own names. What does any of this mean for the world? How might this interfere with preexisting power dynamics, particularly amongst the other Soul Jam owners? What will they end up doing with this power? What if they choose evil, like their father once did? There's no tangible Soul Jam to take away, how would they be stopped if push came to shove? CAN they be?

There are legitimate reasons behind Jack's being Renewal and Paneer's being [you'll know what it is soon enough lol] that I will explain in due time. Not right now though, because I'll be spoiling their character arcs in a massive way. So be patient

[dingodad]

you can link to it if youve already answered it, but how do you think lord english “runs” his empire? by the way you talk about alternia, it sounds to me like you imagine he did play a role as some kind of shadow political leader that made active decisions in the structuring of alternia. is that the case? i think thats really interesting, i always wondered what his rulership over the condesce actually looked like. iirc lord english has only ever shown been screaming and destroying things so i’ve always struggled to imagine if he would even be lucid enough to make decisions or do anything other than mass murder. does doc scratch have some way to implicitly understand his desires and then deliver orders to the condesce on his behalf? or was the caliborn that the “kids” fight at some nebulous time in the “future,” the one who’s soul dirk rips out, not teen caliborn but an actually fully realized adult cherub caliborn who had already been fucking with alternia? idk if that makes sense, the part of the comic where the beta kids are described by caliborn to have been sucked into the juju has always been a little weird for me to wrap my head around. i always imagined the battle happened between them all as kids still but now that im trying to imagine a lucid lord english im realizing they could very well all be adults because we still havent “seen” it actually happen aside from caliborn’s claymation right? anyways. very interested in what your thoughts on caliborn’s active influence on alternia looked like

lots of really great questions! i'll try to get my thoughts in order here.

to start at the beginning of lord english's story: yes, it is an important point that we have no idea "when" caliborn's masterpiece actually takes place; how old caliborn is, where the kids who beat him up even came from... and I think this is because the details in that story don't necessarily matter. while i certainly believe there is a point in caliborn's timeline where a gaggle of teenagers show up and stuff him into a puppet, what we see play out on his claymation stage is a mythologised account of something that happens to him over and over again in many many different ways over the course of his time loop.

so while i wouldn't call that caliborn "fully realised", necessarily, i think we are supposed to see him as "caliborn-as-lord-english"; he has the peg leg, he has mastery over the felt, he's finally obtained the rainbow magic eyes, and while he certainly hasn't encountered the trolls yet, no, he has had loads of practice at being the puppetmaster of his own world as he hones his homosuck craft and uses the terminals left to him by his session to influence homestuck itself! (i don't think whether caliborn is ultimately "teen" or an "adult" is hugely relevant, because caliborn's specific circumstances mean that he doesn't really "grow" or "mature" by aging the same way a human does; he gradually acquires power in different ways.)

related to this, i tend to use the names 'caliborn' and 'lord english' interchangeably. which i know not everyone will agree with, but i think it aligns with the hussie's philosophy that act 6 is about the kid versions of the comic's grownup characters; while, yes, the lord english contained within lil cal also contains sprinklings of equius, dirk and gamzee, these characters are ultimately caliborn's servitors, and i would argue that subsuming weaker personalities into his own is kind of part of caliborn's Bag as a dominant cherub.

anyway, all that is just to say that it's important to be aware that lord english DOES act like caliborn, and isn't just a mindless, speechless force of destruction - at least not all of the time. when damara tries to escape his captivity, he speaks to her in caliborn's voice, and perhaps more importantly, tells us the one thing you must never forget about lord english: he is ALREADY HERE. never be fooled into thinking lord english only showed up at alternia's death and then fucked off into the furthest ring to hunt his sister - his first act was to travel back to the beginning of alternian history and become its architect. notice how as soon as lord english speaks, two things happen: first, the cursor changes into english's reptilian hand; second, we see the puppet hole in doc scratch's back - he was the literal puppetmaster behind scratch's actions the whole time!

so yes, lord english was an active participant in the shaping of the alternian empire, though i think "political leader" is probably the wrong description; he certainly never had any face-to-face conversations or gave any direct orders to any trolls, at least within modern troll history. but that's not what he's about: as the cuestick, and with scratch as his cueball, english's manipulations are more about lining up the perfect shot, executing a precision strike, and then letting events play out exactly as planned.

probably the most influential of these precision strikes was establishing the subjugglator cult, who worship him and his puppet as twin mirthful messiahs; while we don't know exactly how he did this, it's not hard to imagine it had something to do with appearing to them as an all-powerful angel at the very dawn of their society. compare this to how the condesce makes cordial visits to every planet she passes on her journey through the stars, then fucks off to let her army of trolls decimate the place. after all, scratch operates in exactly the same way: he doesn't waste his time constantly relaying orders to his proteges, but rather grooms them when they're still young, turning them into his unwitting soldiers so that when he finally does intervene he's only telling them to do things that "deep down, they already know they want to do." (commentary from Homestuck: Book 4, p. 216)

while the condesce formally becomes english's puppet when she kills the handmaid - inheriting both the rustblood's curse and essentially taking up scratch's role on earth - it's not like she was ever particularly hands-on when it came to helming the metaphorical ship herself. in porrim's words, she was "the Lo+rd's slave all alo+ng [...] thro+ugh manipulatio+n by his cunning emplo+yee", but what the condesce enjoys doing most is delegating! on alternia she gave most of her authority to the subjugglators, and then did the exact same shit again on earth. remember meenah never wanted the responsibilities of heiress, and ran to beforus' pink moon to escape them; the way i see it, the condesce rushing off into space to explore the galaxy instead of overseeing the planet she's responsible for is just a repeat of the same behaviour, and doing so left a power vacuum for english to essentially insert his own guys into. (possibly thematically relevant, since lord english's role is fundamentally to shoot balls into unfilled dark pockets.)

in short, english is cleverer - or at least, more competent - than we give him credit for. it's just that rather than a chess master who moves each piece to its proper place individually, he's playing pool; if you line up just the right shot, you only need to make one move, and the balls will play the rest of the moves off of each other. looked at another way, as the Lord of Time and master of the alpha timeline, english makes his moves by controlling inevitability itself. he engineers things so that events can only play out in the exact way he wants them to, and all other options are doomed. and to do that, he only needs to be present at key moments in alternia's history - most importantly its very beginning and its very end.

[antiendovents]

hiii I might start doing this every so often bc Ik from experience answering vents is hard work how are you/yall doing? anything interesting happen today? did ya go anywhere? learn something new? hell whats your obsession, I'll listen to you rant about it :P <3 /p

awh, thank you so much!! We really appreciate it, while we do love being able to help people it is pretty tiring answering vents a lot, so it's nice to get little breaks ! ^_^

We're doing fine, a little tired right now. Nothing big is happening today (thankfully) but we are trying to focus on finishing off our SP (after like a year of working on it) or at least getting closer to finishing it if we can- we did just learn some random facts about queen bees (like how their workers swarm them and basically cook them alive when they're old or how they starve them to death, or how sometimes the queen bee will take half of the worker bees and go to make a new hive when there's a new queen, or something like that)

Currently our obsession is probably Dandy's world, though we're also pretty interested in Call of Duty (though we can't actually talk much about it in a canon sense because we can't afford the stuff needed to play it, so we're more or less just obsessed with the CoD fandom and the characters).

((long rant below about Dandy's world— made with the assumption you already know what it is, I would explain what it is just incase you don't but I'm actually horrible at explaining it so I fear I might just confuse you even more 😓))

Honestly though, we've gotten into Dandy's world a lot lately, our brother introduced us to it because he knows we like games with cute little guys and we loved it immediately. Glisten is one of our favourites, we sort of headcannon him to have NPD (well actually it's more so just us projecting because we relate to him and we have NPD, but yah!), but we also LOVE Goob. We spent like a week straight trying to find his twisted so we could get Scraps and then when we got her we worked as hard as we could to get her mastery and to get enough ichor to buy Goob! We're not really good at distracting (because we keep walking into walls or accidentally getting people killed 😓) but we find Goob adorable and we honestly wish we could play him more without people being angry at us. Speaking of we actually really like Astro too, he's such a cutie, we spent a while finding his twisted and then about 3 days saving up to get him. We're not the best at playing him (movement speed fucks us over) but we love his little animations and the sounds he makes when he speaks, we really wanna get his skin (the yellow one, I forgot what it's called) because it's just so cute. We actually really want to make an AU for Dandy's world but we're so bad at keeping up with those sorts of things and making them in time that I feel like once we actually made it no one would be interested in Dandy's world AU's anymore :( and also we saw someone with basically the same idea and it made us wanna cry because we thought our idea was cool (we made it with our brother too). We might talk more about that AU some other time, I'm not sure.

[tealfling]

Rolan would be such a good uncle, is perpready to give Lia and wyll time to rest by taking the baby.

It's important to him that the baby knows they have family that cares

Absolutely.

Rolan's already there constantly visiting (he calls it 'checking up on them' but we know better). The Ravenguards are in a position to want for nothing, but Rolan still brings them magical quality of life improvements.

And he showers that baby in gifts. Every visit he brings something.

Rolan and Cal are secretly in an unspoken "Favorite Uncle" competition. Points are tallied every time the baby gives one of them "uppie" hands. Rolan is ahead by two somehow and Cal is fighting for his life trying to be the goofy fun uncle to catch up.

Rolan's 'little light show' is a family favorite that gets more fantastic for the family littles. There are nights when Uncle Rolan watches the baby and leaves the dancing light over the crib while she sleeps.

He loves his siblings deeply and by extension their children. At one point all they had was each other and that bond is unbreakable. They know they can call on other for support.

The second Lia calls for him, he's ready. It doesn't matter for what, or why or when, the man is THERE. He's even reaching out to Cal: did you talk to her? Do you know what's going on? Are you going? The tiefling siblings always roll together.

Wyll & Lia could have called on the best clerics in the Gate, but they call for her brother first. There's probably a manor full of staff, the baby probably has her own nurse, but Lia & Wyll have strong family bonds and are very hands on parents. So it's family they look to for advice first.

Rolan knows exactly how frustrated she is when feeling helpless. Whatever's going on, they'll figure it out together.

A Rolan in a relationship with Tav also brings his partner along, and Wyll is always over the moon to see his friend.

This is the dream team of "We've got you covered."

If they sense at all Lia and Wyll are tired, they promptly send mom & dad off to rest. Even still, they make sure Wyll & Lia are making sure their own needs are met.

For fussy baby problems, they can all trouble shoot together and figure it out. We saved the world, everything else is easy. If all else fails, they know three great healers they can call on.

(Wyll or Tav can make a joke about calling on Jaheira for some of her great motherly advice. Which is only really a joke if the baby isn't too ill. If that baby is in pain or has a fever they can't deal with Tav would personally knock on Jaheira's door.)

A druid or cleric Tav would be able to handle it too. But I imagine an arcane wielder (like Coren) could be very creative with spell use.

[ "Oh, what troubles you so my little Squishy? Do your wittle nubbies hurt?" The sorceress runs her icy palm over the child's forehead. "Does that feel better?" She asks, massaging the swollen node with her finger, sending the faintest electric hum to numb the pain.]

As the children grow, there is a fantastic sense of family amongst them. Every occasion is a large family gathering.

Dad, former Blade or Frontiers, Hero of Baulder's Gate is still a renowned story teller. Now his daughter has taken to telling tall tales of her own.

Imagine everyone seated in a warm sitting room where an adorable little tiefling girl with a wooden sword acts out a familiar adventure. It doesn't happen quite like those in the room that lived it recall, but it's a charming story and Uncle Rolan makes the best visual effects with his mastery of magic.

[mythicalartistx]

I hate Master Odin from DR and my opinions of the other Masters

Mickey

Mickey is constantly hated in KH but there is someone who deserves it so much more. First of all he only knew Aqua was in the realm of darkness for a year.

Then Yen Sid commanded him not to go, plus he was busy with dealing with Organization XIII, then the Journal, and the exams Sora and Riku took. And the last two only probably took a month or so each.

Then he tried to find her with Riku's help because it's probably better to go with another person....

I don't get it especially when Odin— the worse master to ever happened exists.

And Mickey did so much for Riku and helps him when he needs someone.

I hate Odin with so much passion and one of the main reasons is that he isn't shown as doing anything wrong. They treat it like he didn't make any mistakes.

Ansem

He makes Ansem look so good in comparison —who I have mixed feelings on and I think Ansem's change of heart isn't genuine and seems way too fast.

Like the dude is talking trash about nobodies and how they don't deserve to exist and they have no feelings. Then suddenly at the end you regret that and is like I'm sorry Roxas?? Like why? How did you get to this reason?

It doesn't seem genuine and then he sacrifices himself like oh now we're supposed to feel bad because he did this one good thing?

And Riku did not need to deal with this guy, he's awful.

But back to him.

Odin

This guy is the reason why Xehanort is the way he is. He set him on the path. Odin can't understand mental health. This student of his was going through some things because his sister was missing and presumably dead. He was not in a good head space and depressed so Odin decides to isolate him??

Yeah.....

Not a good thing.

It makes him worse and then darkness influences him🤦

And then there are these missing students so he decides the best thing to find the students are to send his INEXPERIENCED UNDERCLASSMEN?

It makes no sense.

It's stupid.

They could also get hurt.

Why doesn't he A MASTER TRY TO LOOK FOR THEM or send I don't know another master???

But he send Xehanort Eraqus and several others.

And basically them going to worlds make it where they question how things are which lead Xehanort down his path of destruction. It makes him curious about darkness and curious if it's right or wrong to dwell in world's affairs even if it's a world with people doing bad things.

Then the student who was not in a good place... Yeah Baldr gets influenced by darkness badly and wants to hurt and decides to kill everyone

IT'S NOT GOOD

And then Xehanort and Eraqus are the only ones left. So Odin decides to tell Xehanort to kill him.

And Xehanort has been having thoughts about darkness and light and what everything means. And he didn't exactly disagree with some of the things Baldr said.

WHY WOULD HE PLACE THE BURDEN ON XEHANORT?

And by doing that he cause him to eventually go down dark path.

Then Odin retires.

I'M SO GLAD.

He deserves to retire after failing and being an awful person and master.

Like dude is so bad.

But that's not until he sends the two survivors into taking the mark of mastery exam which is a stupid exam which always have bad things happen.

And Xehanort meets The Master of Master who honestly seems chaotic and just does things because he is bored. That's my gist of this guy. An he's not good for him.

He causes him to go farther in and become worse.

Yeahhhhhhh

He gets so interested learning about darkness and light. He probably heard about things relating to kingdom hearts from M.O.M.

Then Xehanort leaves Eraqus and when he comes back he's different. Eraqus can tell and realizes he has been obsessed with darkness. They even get in fights. It doesn't go well.

And Odin isn't heard from again thank goodness.

If Sora dealt with this guy man it would be so bad.

Master Yen Sid

Now he isn't that great.

For one he believes all nobodies are bad?

Like why? They just want hearts to live. They aren't bad people. But he makes Sora think really bad of them.

Also he doesn't really do much. He seems to be really strong as shown in kh3 but he just sits back and lets all the kids do everything.

During the exam in DDD, it was rigged because of Xehanort. And Sora doesn't pass because Riku dived in a second time. BUT SORA WOULD DEFINITELY DO IT FOR RIKU.

It's the stupidest reason why Sora didn't pass. I'm fine with the idea of Sora not becoming a master yet BUT MAYBE DO A BETTER REASON OR SOMETHING

Yen Sid is dumb.

Also not allowing anyone to go back to search for Aqua until kh3

And taking the exam in the first place is dumb. They just realized that something bad is in the midst from the recoded events and then he summons Sora and Riku to take this exam.

They don't think someone might try to mess with it AT ALL??

Also as Sora said, they proved themselves several times. Only because of Riku insecurities they end up taking it. Riku's still doesn't believe in himself and fears his darkness a bit...

So Sora takes because Riku does. He just wanted to take it with him and be with him by doing so.

Yeah that doesn't work out.

Also Yen Sid training Kairi with Axel is kinda bad??? Like they should have helping them instead of endlessly training. It doesn't seem that great since they both easily gets knocked away.

But yeah, it's not too good but it's not necessary bad.

Eraqus

He's a pretty decent Master. And when I say decent I mean he tried. What he does that no one else does is he APOLOGIZES. He acknowledges what he does is wrong in kh3. He hugs all of them and apologizes. It seems genuine.

And after dark road his actions make sense he does what he does because he's afraid of them dying from darkness like Baldr or being corrupted and dangerous.

Though I HAVE NO IDEA why he brought Xehanort around?

Did he not remember??

He sees all three of his apprentices as his own.

He has Aqua look out for Terra because he was worried. But he realizes how much pressure he put on her.

As for Ven he thinks destroying him is the best way to stop the χ blade from being forged and doing what Xehanort wants.

IMMEDIATELY AFTER HE REGRETS IT.

He is like how could I raise my hand against you, talking to Terra and referring to Ventus.

And Terra protects Ventus because he cares for him and he uses darkness for a good reason.

And I'm not going into Aqua because she doesn't really do that much with others besides watch Terra which Eraqus told her to do, it's not from her own decisions and things. She doesn't really have time to act that much. And afterwards she is by herself in the realm of darkness.

Riku, I'm not going into either because he doesn't do much yet involving his title.

[vampvalerian]

Most wonderful afternoon, Labelas! 6 (perhaps pertaining to Mystryl, or any other God you happen to remember?), 9 and 14 for the ask game!

Afternoon to you as well!! This was insanely fun to write

6 - Memory with [Mystryl]

While my knowledge of my doings before the spellplague is limited, I remember Mystryl. For a specific memory, when we created the Time Conduit spell together. She was sick of time travelers, I was sick of time travelers, we got together and with my mastery (or, at that time, more like loose grasp) of the continuum and her mastery of the weave we created a spell to prevent mortals from screwing with my domain. Unfortunately this did not pertain to gods, as I would shortly find out. Fuck you Moonbow.

I remember that the time of our collaboration was one of the first that I had been respected as my own deity instead of an extension of Corellon and for that I am immensely grateful to her. As the goddess of the entire weave and then some, her opinion of me carried heavy weight that thankfully carried past that of her passing. I never got close to Mystra, unfortunately, as by the time she had rose to power I had become a bit more bitter than I would like to admit.

9 - If you could change anything you did in canon / go back and do something you didn’t do, what would it be?

Oh! I quite literally just talked about that. What a fortunate transition. One of the things I would do is try harder to reject Corellon's influence. As the father of elvenkind he had a harsh grip on all of the Seldarine and wanted to mold most of us to his image. Now - I make him out to be much more malicious than he truely was. I was naive and vulnerable and he simply rubbed off on me too much. His influence, by none of his will, turned me from a stoic yet gentle god to a bitter and somewhat harsh one.

If I had never undergone that transition, I would have probably been more acquainted with Mystra, but Corellon convinced me that I was above the doings of mortals and so for a goddess so devoted to ensuring her domain was secure to the point of collaborating with mortals - well, I wasn't a fan. Wow that was a long sentence. This sentiment goes for many gods, actually.

Even though the two are directly related and I had to go back and only change ONE action, I would never have abandoned Ollie how I did. I had originally created him as my own vessel but his resemblance to a drow made me see him as unfit. I can't blame Corellon for that one - it was my own hatefulness. I could have used him as my vessel, or I could have, at the very least, raised him to be his own god, however that would have worked. He was destined for so much greatness and the moment I sent him off to mortal parents I threw it away.

14 - What was something you loved in your canon?

Reading. I loved reading. I was an archivist, so naturally I documented the doings of both mortals and the gods. Because I was so against meddling with mortals, my only exposure to the mortal world was books written by them. I mostly read those written by elves, but I did read some academic papers from all over Toril. I quite enjoyed reading about Drizzt a few years after that ordeal had started - the idea of a 'good drow' was very novel to me. It was also one of my only pastimes. When I wasn't having an aggressive staring contest with the continuum or dealing with some mortal who time-fucked a bit too close to the sun I was reading. When I reconnected with Ollie, I swooped him into my domain for hours-long tea parties where I shared all of my favorite books with him.

Labelas, go one post without mentioning Corellon challenge. Level: Impossible.

[noodyl-blasstal]

Blupjeans Week: Bet (day 2)

It's @blupjeansweek day 2. This follows on from yesterday's prompt. You can also read on Ao3

-

"It's going to be fine."

"Easy for you to say, you just casually revolutionised thermodynamics, you're gonna walk your viva." Barry could hear Lup rolling her eyes at that one, though he stayed resolutely focused on the raggedy copy of his thesis which was, at this point, 70% sticky notes. Could he read what any of them said because of how much they overlapped? Shut up.

"Natch, evocation is never going to be the same thanks to cha'girl's research, but that doesn't meant you're going to fail, Barold."

"No, they're just going to MPhil me out."

Lup sighed heavily. "Oh no, you worked hard and gained mastery in a subject, how terrible, what an embarrassment."

Barry did look up then, didn't she get it? He’d thought she’d get it. It was an embarrassment! She’d watched him put so much into this, the stupid well thumbed, badly bound paper stack represented four years of late nights, early mornings, cancelled plans, 3am anxiety… he thought she understood. She’d lived it with him, they were working for the key to the next level, if they gave him the wrong one what was even the point? "You think…?"

"I'm being flippant because that's not going to happen. Once again, I've read your work my guy, it's good, in fact, it’s great. In fact, right now, you’re arguing with established fact.” Barry grimaced as Lup spoke, but she ploughed on. “... you've already published three chapters of this thing in peer reviewed journals. 6/6 esteemed peer reviewers agree!"

"But they publish bad science all the tim…"

Lup cut him off. "Barry stop. You know you’ve done good science because a) I would have told you if you hadn’t, and b) peer reviewers might be lazy but you’re not. You know your submissions were solid, just look at the citations.”

“But…” She was right. But Barry still struggled, sure she hadn’t said anything incorrect, he knew he’d done solid work, but he also just knew that he’d fucked this up.

“...But what? But maybe they're idiots who can't recognise genius? They're gonna recognise it, Barry. It's impossible not to recognise how brilliant you are. That thesis is just you yelling “I’m Barry Bluejeans and I know what the fuck I’m talking about, pay me money about it.” Plus, publish a few more chapters and you can do PhD by publication without those losers to worry about anyway."

Barry didn’t even register the second part because Lup thought he was brilliant! Lup thought he was brilliant and she was telling him and he kept shutting her down instead of just being grateful about it. Maybe if he tried to accept the compliment. "Than…"

Lup started speaking at the same time. "In fact…" She paused to let him speak, but he shook his head and gestured to her, he could try being gracious another day. "... Okay, if you're sure." He nodded. "I think, Baraldo, that we should make a bet, you and I. I may as well profit from all this self doubt, so I bet you're gonna pass with no corrections."

Barry laughed bitterly. Whatever she was betting she'd be losing. "Lup, I'm going to fail."

Lup shoved his shoulder gently. "You're not and you know it. Be serious."

"Oh, like yours was serious?"

Lup's ears flicked back defensively. "Serious? Barry, c'mon. Obviously we all know cha’girl’s out here shaping the future of evocation, but you're doing magic within magic on all your spooktacular stuff. The chapter on spell wheels? I'd never considered it, and even if I had, I definitely would have taken at least 10 minutes longer than you to come up with something so elegant. You know what you're doing, I know what I'm doing, it's why we're such a great team."

They did make a great team. They’d met the first day of undergrad at orientation. Barry the lone mature student in a sea of babies, then Lup and Taako had appeared, and sure there was The Nerd Incident, but they cleared that pretty fast. They coincided in most classes, worked together in labs, and powered their way through a ridiculous amount of higher education together. There hadn’t been any question about it when the option of choosing housing came up, they lived together off campus and were joined by a rotating cast which had pretty much always featured Taako (well, until this year), but LupAndBarry, BarryAndLup? They were a constant, they worked. “We do work well together.” 

“You can say that again.” Lup glared at him as he opened his mouth to repeat it. “...And you know exactly how smart I am, right?” Lup asked. Barry could taste the trap-ness of this question, she was an angler fish and the question was a beautiful little light, he was going to answer it honestly and wholly and she was going to chomp him down with her big clever teeth.

“You’re incredible Lup, your research is amazing and you’re passionate and eloquent and so smart…” 

Lup’s teeth closed. “Then you know I know my shit well enough to know your shit’s good, so, what’s your bet?”

“I pass with major corrections?”

Lup raised an eyebrow. “Question, or an answer?”

“I pass with majors.”

“Fine. If you want to lose whatever you’re betting then be my guest, Bluejeans.”

“I don’t think I have anything you want.” Barry said, and he wasn’t sure, it was a ridiculous thought, but he could have sworn that Lup’s ears reddened at the tips. She coughed loudly, then almost shouted “Jeans.”

“What?”

Lup coughed again and spoke in a softer tone. “I get rights to your wardrobe. I know your jeans are comfier than mine.”

Barry hesitated. He’d already lost a good chunk of his shirts and sweaters to Lup. Not that he minded most of the time, he usually managed to steal his favourites back briefly on laundry day, but his jeans? He only had three pairs and they all served specific purposes in his life, he couldn't afford to sacrifice them, no matter how cute Lup would look in them. But, <;i>but</i>, there was no way he was actually going to pass without corrections, everyone at least got minors and Barry's supervisor definitely didn't think he'd even manage that. According to the available evidence, this seemed like a safe bet. "Deal!"

Lup grinned big and wide and dangerous . "GuyWhoJustLostHisJeansSaysWhat."

"What?" Barry asked.

Lup snickered. "Just asking what you wanted from me if your externals are somehow struck incapable of recognising brilliance?"

Oh... yeah, Barry had forgotten this part. Lup's brash overconfidence in his abilities had essentially signed her up to do whatever he wanted. He could stick her with dish duty for the next hundred years; make her actually use the dregs of her body wash before she moved onto the next one so the edge of the shower wasn't a terrifying pile of upside down barely balanced bottles; he could ask her to tell him whether there was an expiration date on their whole thing, whether the end of study meant different directions and fond memories, phone calls which dwindled as she remembered less and less… "You have to come home with me." He blurted out the thought before he could properly consider what he was asking. Was that too much? Oh it was probably too much. A trip home meant a road trip, motels, meeting his Mum. There was no way Marlena wouldn't pick up on exactly how he felt about Lup, not that she hadn’t already, but it was easier to lie on the phone. Plus, there was no way his Mum wouldn't love Lup too. How could anyone not? Then he’d only disappoint her when Lup moved on with her life and left him behind. Maybe he could back track, do the dishes thing instead…

"You have yourself a deal, Mr Bluejeans, may as well use that title one last time. Now, I have some outfits to plan, go eat the sandwich I made you, then I'll help with the last minute prep." Lup disappeared in the direction of Barry's room. 

Barry resigned himself to losing another few shirts while Lup investigated his wardrobe and obediently shuffled his way to the kitchen. It was definitely time to eat, he wasn't entirely sure when he last did… probably the last time Lup shoved food at him. He definitely had to thank her when this was over. 

-

"...And why did you decide on Necrostics?" Lup looked expectantly at Barry. 

"It was the most logical methodological approach as it incorporates acknowledgement of the agency held by constructs and the undead while also acknowledging the influence of social and summoning factors. I modified the approach to ensure it was appropriately controlling for the new spells I developed."

Lup clapped her hands delightedly. 

"It was that good an answer?" Barry asked.

"It's that good a wardrobe. I cannot wait to get my hands on it, Barold, you're gonna be living in your pants… although…" Lup narrowed her eyes. 

"Absolutely not, no!"

Lup shrugged. "You can't watch your stuff all the time, Barry. Cha'girl needs some new sleep shorts."

Barry felt his face flame at the thought of Lup sleeping in his clothes, Lup wanting to. "I'd better go now!" He said, too fast and too loud. "Gotta go get it over with."

Lup jumped up. "Cool, I'll grab my book and and few other bits and come with. There's some comfy chairs in the corridor with my name on them."

Oh. Lup was going to come with him. Lup was going to wait for him. "You don't have t…"

"I want to."

–

"Good luck Barold, you've got this." Lup hugged him firmly, he squeezed back. If he didn't let go he didn't have to go into the scary room. Can't defend your thesis if you’re in the middle of a hug, that’s just science. Lup pulled back slightly, then dipped her head to kiss him on the cheek.

Barry didn't have time to react before Lup pulled away and planted herself across the corridor chairs, head buried in her book.

"Are you ready, Mr Bluejeans?" A voice asked from the door behind him. All Barry could do was touch a hand to his cheek, turn, and nod. 

– 

"Congratulations again, Dr Bluejeans, this may be the most enjoyable viva I have ever taken part in." Said Dr Combish, opening the door for him. 

Barry was going to pass out. The adrenaline finally drained out of him, weeks, months of panic, gone. It was over. An outright pass? It was so rare, so ridiculously unlikely. He should be raring to celebrate, but mostly he just wanted to go home and sit very still in the dark. He stepped into the corridor, remembered to thank Dr Combish, and stared numbly at the door as it closed. What did he even do now? It was over. A whole chunk of his life was just… done. He had the keys to the next stage, had the fancy title, had everything he'd worked for and… and? 

"Hey Bear?" Lup nudged his arm gently. "How'd it go?" 

"I… I passed?" Said Barry. "Yeah. They. Well. I passed!" His voice broke momentarily, to say it was so surreal. "Lup! I passed!!!" He grabbed her into a hug. "I did it! We did it! Thank you, thank you thank you thank you!"

"Knew you could." Lup said thickly, hugging him back. They didn’t say anything for a while, just held on tight. “We… we should do something.” Said Lup, eventually. “Celebrate, you know.”

“We’ll celebrate together when you pass next week.” Barry didn’t even have to think about it. Whatever he could do, Lup could do better, there was no way she’d be correcting anything.

“Fine, but we’re getting pizza, from the good place.” Lup grabbed her backpack from the chairs.

Barry stared for a second. “You… you’re wearing my garden jeans. Lup!”

“And they look great on me. Told you I believed in you. Fair’s fair.” Lup winked, wiggled her butt, and grabbed his hand. “Now, let’s get you home, Baraldo. We need to ring Marlena and tell her, she’ll be having kittens.”

Barry couldn’t do anything but nod.

[donnerpartyofone]

As a casual bystander, I see a lot of dialog about the economic aspects of AI art, and comparatively little about its actual artistic value--that is, what happens when the viewer consumes it. AI imagery can have a fun, surprising impact that I would compare superficially with broken english; someone who doesn't have mastery over the conventions of a language may come up with excitingly unusual expressions that would never occur to a native speaker. When I see AI art it seems like a lot of the action comes from looking at the prompt and looking at the image and kind of measuring the distance between them, trying to imagine the program's "thought process" if I can call it that. Sometimes these things have an interesting aesthetic too, but it's hard for me to tell where that comes from or how controllable it is (and I mean the real visual effect of the thing, not like "Oh I see, the prompt included 'comic book style'" or something). But the key difference between AI art and human art seems to be the physical presence of the person. I'm not even trying to be sentimental or something, I just mean when I look at most sculptures/paintings/drawings/installations/textiles/etc, I sense the person who made them. I get an idea about the physical energy and discipline and difficulty that went into the creation of the object, and I also get a feeling about what the artist meant by what they did. As a result of who they are and what they have experienced, they developed something that they wanted to say so badly that they were willing to undergo a major trial to say it in a highly specific way.

To be fair intentionality is really slippery and hard to prove unless the individual artist has been very explicit (and even then you can't always trust them, or you can decide their intention isn't as important as your interpretation), but to some degree the viewer is always helplessly projecting something about themselves onto the art and/or their personal construction of who the artist is. You look at art and you estimate what kind of experience that artist seems to have had, and your emotional and interpretive responses to the art naturally draw on your own feelings and memories. That whole part seems to be missing from AI art; of course there's the human composing the prompts, so there's a trace of psychology in that, but the actual creation of the work (as far as I can tell) is done by a program that is not reflecting on its own history, or the personal sacrifices that it made to build its skillset, or its feelings about its own social/political/historical context. Basically there is nothing the program is wrestling with, that the viewer might relate or react to.

Of course art is always a rorschach test on some level, and there is no law that says you have to view works of art as records of biographical fact. Actually there's a whole aspect of art history writing that totally rejects personal and psychological suppositions about art. One of my college advisors loved me when he saw my writing potential, and then completely turned on me when he realized that I was only interested in (or only capable of) a psychoanalytic style of interpretation (my thesis was on a selection of Crumb comics where the artist or his stand-in rides on or inside of powerful female bodies, driving them like tanks or jets, which I thought suggested fear, awe, and jealousy, not just garden variety misogyny). He was a pure historian; you were only allowed to do purely material investigations of the art object, and you could only talk about its larger historical context. He had done some big project on a famous painting cycle with an exclusive focus on the state of industrial paint production at the time of the work. In one of my first classes with him we all went to a museum where everyone was assigned a short essay on one piece there, and the rule was you could ONLY do a formal description, there could be NO interpretation. I wish I could think of the name of it, but my piece was just a clear plastic tube that was stuffed full of rubbish. Coming up with a compelling description of this thing was borderline impossible, I basically just had to list as many pieces of garbage as I could identify--which sounds sort of poetic and funny now, but I'm sure it wasn't when I wrote it. I don't know how much I learned from doing that, but I thought about this professor when I saw the Warhol Diaries docuseries recently. There's a late episode where they talk about Warhol's famous statements about wanting to be a machine and insisting that his art has no personal meaning, and a bunch of experts argue convincingly that his work is actually loaded with personal material, anxiety, longing, shame, etc--it's encoded with the things that Warhol was too afraid to say out loud in a literal way. One particular collector finds all of this totally repulsive and unnecessary, as if it's just a stain on the formal quality of Warhol's output. His way of seeing things is totally valid and not uncommon, but it's curious that he gets so angry when people see Warhol himself in the work. Now I wonder if and how this lens could apply to looking at AI art. Is it possible to do that same kind of purely formal analysis if you don't have an intimate understanding of the AI's mechanics? If it's not possible, and it's still IMpossible to view AI art the same sympathetic way we view human-produced art, what is left?

My question is not rhetorical, and I'm not saying that AI art can't be art because of the absence of human psychology; I don't know if I'm ready to make that conclusion. I think I'm saying that if AI art IS art, then consuming and appreciating it requires a really different philosophy than what most of us are used to using. It might even require a different definition of what makes something art. Maybe AI can produce art, but not art as we have known it. Are we sort of looking at AI art the way we look at shapes formed by clouds? That one looks like a heart. That one looks like a bunny. That one looks like a guy, but he's got too many fingers. My analogy is not perfect because there IS someone whose input inspires the shapes, but there is a similar entropic quality to what shapes are actually produced and why. If there is a God up there molding clouds into familiar shapes, then His thought process is probably beyond our comprehension. Our perception of familiar shapes may be pure projection.

[rosie-kairi]

Other possibility of the Lauriam and Ven travel together AU so like a different branch if you will.

I personally love the theory that Kairi's grandma is master ava (I also make Lea Kairi's older brother and a keyblade wielder already I love tragic siblings what can I say) so when Lauriam gets blasted off he ends up in Radiant Garden and meets up with his old master.

Ava has tried to live a peaceful quiet life and so when she has a daughter she purposely didn't make her a keyblade wielder, teach her about light and darkness or the keyblade war. She wanted her daughter and by extension grandson to live in peace. However things go wrong when she's pregnant with Kairi and goes into labor. Her pure light attracts all sorts or heartless and darkness trying to snuff Kairi's light before she's born. Ava has no choice but to fend off the attack leaving a 12 year old Lea to be midwife and deliver his sister. Unfortunately the strain of the attack and darkness trying to extinguish light means his moms light get taken instead. Her heart passes moments later. Ava blames herself, had she not let fear take hold in her heart perhaps her daughter would have been able to fend off the darkness and not leave her children orphaned. After checking over kairi Ava realizes she's one of the 7 pure lights and realizes in despair she'll be hunted down by darkness. With little choice she tells Lea about her past and begins training him do he can protect his sister.

Lauriam shows up not long after. He fills Ava in on what's happened and the two start piecing things together. Ava realizes MoM orchestrated all this and she was too blind to see the red flags. She promises to help find Ven and properly train Lauriam.

Lauriam becomes a master in those 4 years and looks high and low for Strelitzia and Ven as well as any of the fore tellers and Xehanort but they all seem to be hidden well. He starts hearing rumors of 3 keyblade wielders traveling the worlds and tries to track them down but he's just one step behind.

Lea is getting ready to take his own mark of mastery, he and Lauriam have formed a close friendship, he remind him of Ven and watching Lea take care of Kairi reminds him of being his own sisters caretaker.

By the time Lauriam makes it to the keyblade graveyard the battle is over. Frustration builds he doesn't understand why all his loved ones are out of his reach.

Over the next year he hears Lea and Isa talk about a girl and hope flares that maybe it's skuld. But before he can properly investigate xehanort plunges the world into darkness. Ava teller Lauriam to take the kids and run while she holds off the heartless but even he knows she'll be overwhelmed. He tells Lea and Isa to take Kairi (sadly their 3 fates are sealed) and run but he ends up running into Luxu, same thing happens as before Luxu has been keeping an eye on Lauriam waiting for the right moment and now here it is. He doesn't beat him in a fight Lauriam is much stronger here but he leads Lauriam to think Ven is tied up in the basement. He desperately goes to find him but it's a trap and gets attacked by terranort. As he's becoming a nobody all he can think about is how no matter how strong he gets it's never enough.

Marluxia has only one name in his head that he can remember, Ventus. He doesn't know why being around Roxas is familiar and painful. Being at CO however ironically stirs up his forgotten memories and while he can't find Ven hidden in the chamber he just knows he's there and suddenly understands why Xemnas sent half of them here. So Marluxia purposely plays the villain he doesn't trust himself to protect Ven this time and thinks being killed will be the better option. Sleeping away Ven's heart inside Sora responds to Marluxia making Sora very confused because he hates Marluxia but he also has a deep longing to be with the lord of the castle. Marluxia's final moments are praying Ven and the others are safe and silently apologizes for all his failures.

He has zero memories at the keyblade graveyard it's not until his second death does he remember and thanks sora for "protecting him when he could not" once again confusing sora.

MoM is watching all this and is like hmmmm that Ven and Lauriam maaaaaay be of use to the next phase of my plans. (He's such an asshole).

Basically what if Lauriam went to RG met up with Ava and even though he gets stronger it's still not enough and he's still chasing ghosts and being a step behind just a minute too late to make a difference.

Anon, if you're going to hurt me like this, I'd much prefer you come to my house and shoot me directly rather than torture me psychologically over tumblr asks.

(That is to say, this is great keep it coming)