hiroyildiz

[hiroyildiz]

All hail Jorge Rivera-Herrans.

Gotta be my fav fanfic writer 🫶

[hiroyildiz]

So, have you guys got a Song of Achilles AU that's told by Achilles' POV or do I have to write that for me?

[hiroyildiz]

I don't usually get these but MOVIE IDEA✨✨✨

A psycholog who can't date, because whenever they try to date someone they psychoanalyze them, and their partner always hates it.

Partner 1: *Keeps buying psycholog expensive gifts and are so annoying all over*

Psycholog: You're trying to buy affection with money, and you are an attention whore, forgive my informal languace. Your parents didn't give you much attention in your childhood and were always busy tring to make money. I don't want to date you.

Partner 2: *Talks about hyperfixation for hours, is from a conservative family*

Psycholog: You're autistic and you have religious trauma. I wouldn't like to be a part your family. (Doesn't mean anything bad by it, but the partner gets offended anyways)

Partner 5: *Breathes*

Psycholog: Daddy issues.

And then they met someone so fucked up they are like: 🥺 I can fix them! Even better, I can write my Phd about them🥴

And then they get into a relationship and their partner slowly realizes that: the psycholog is crazy af.

Like one day they will trauma dump them and they will start evil laughing and shit.

Partner be like: you are actually so fucked up aren't you?

Plus points if the psycholog is something like Dr. House or Sherlock Holmes (Also I learned House is somehow inspired by Sherlock Holmes? I actually love that.), or it can be fanfic.

[hiroyildiz]

In most places, the children are taught to scream 'mom' when they are in danger.

In Crime Alley and Bowery and other turfs of Red Hood, parents teach their kids to scream 'mom' but also, when they are in a really dangerous situation where one person won't be able to help, they teach them to scream 'dad' or 'Batman'. They know Batman won't come, and that a man will not have the same instinct as a woman to run into danger for an unknown child. It's not because of that. It's because Red Hood will hear, he has ears everywhere in his turf, and he will come. He will come running when a child calls for help.

Jason Todd will come running when a child calls for Batman or dad, because no one came for him when he called. He screamed for his dad and he knows how it feels to think he will die and no one will come. He will not let that happen to these kids whom he swore to protect.

It doesn't matter if it's night and he is in costume or in the morning when he is running groceries, it doesn't matter if the kids call for mom or dad or batman, Jason Todd has a greater heart than most people and he chose to use it for the children.

[hiroyildiz]

Of course YJH is so fucking gay for KDJ; he is HSY's love for KDJ embodied and she ended the fucking world to save him!

[hiroyildiz]

One Piece but Luffy is flirty as fuck.

This boy was raised on a bar until he was seven. He spend most of his time with Shanks in said bar and idolized that man. He heard so many things.

Then he was sent to live with literal bandits and I'll be damned if those dumbasses never tried to rip off rich assholes by schmoozing em.

There is also Ace and Sabo. These three tricked restaurants into believing they were an adult man. I can't imagine Ace not taking the role a little too far and flirting with waiters. Sabo was raised rich and he never grew out of that gentelmanly passive aggressive flirtation tactics that work on rich women, whick consisted of body language and small touches on the hands, shoulders and hair. After Sabo's incident it was only two of them Luffy would sweet talk people to distract them as Ace piled up dishes from the kitchen.

Worst thing is, he doesn't even know he is doing it. He is constantly using words like: love, honey, sugar, sweetheart, etc... and his crew just gets used to it along with pecks on the cheek and pats on their shoulders, arms, cheeks, legs... They know he doesn't mean anything bad by it but their first meeting were awkward at best.

Luffy: All this heat must be getting to your pretty head, what about you come with me sugar and sail the seas?

Zoro *thinking*: I will kill this guy.

-after all the fiasco-

Luffy: What do you say, love? Ready to go?

Zoro *thinking*: Wtf? I'm... gay?

Zoro: Aye aye, captain.

Luffy *twirling a lock of Nami's hair on his fingers*: You know stealing is bad, kitten.

Nami: Listen here you fuck-

Luffy: I knew your daddy, he was a nice guy, very handsome, just like you.

Nami, Usopp: WTF MAN???

(Zoro is getting the hang of Luffy-ism at the time so he doesn't outwardly react but still feels the shiver)

Luffy: All Blue can have all the fish at the sea, if only I get to keep you, darlin'.

Sanji *panicking bc some weirdo is flirting w him*: Nu-uh. I'm into women. Go away. Go. Just go!

Luffy: *Only ever addresses Vivi as Princess*

Luffy: The real monster is my heart, can't you hear it roaring?

Chopper *a doctor*: What do YOU MEAN YOUR HEART IS ROARING?!

Luffy: Sure u can stay Mama.

Robin: *morbidly curious and entertained*

Luffy: Wow, look at those guns, baby.

Franky: *too dense to know what flirting look like*

Franky: I know right. They are SUPER.

Brook: I can't feel anything. Why? Because I'm all bones and no skin! Yohohohoho!

Luffy: Does that mean you can't feel my love for you?🥺

Brook *panicked*: Of course I feel it! Deep in my bones! Yohohohohoho...

Luffy: You can have my heart mr. tall, dark and handsome.

Law * Slightly suspicious*: No thanks.

Luffy: U sure, sweetheart? It beats for u. *Wink wink*

Law *100% suspicious*: U-huh.

Luffy *At Wano*: Kids! Daddy is back!

Crew: *Cheers*

Jimbe *Resigned after Impel Down plus Marinefors plus Mermaid Island*: Yeah kids, daddy's home!

Everyone is mortified. Straw Hats are the flirtiest bunch u will ever meet. And Shanks doesn't even know what he has created.

[hiroyildiz]

Look, this is fine;

Teen Titans: Tim! That's poison!

Tim *throwing away the knife he was just stabbed with*: It's okay! I am from Gotham! I'm immune!

Teen Titans: What?!

But I like this more;

Teen Titans: Tim! That's poison!

Tim *throwing away the knife he was just stabbed with*: It's okay! Batman(or any other mentor he trained with) poisoned me slowly(so I would gain immunity) when I was working under him! I'm immune!

Teen Titans: What?!

[hiroyildiz]

I have seen a few Spiderman in Gotham fanfics, but I haven't seen any of them featuring Jason and Peter being trauma buddies.

What I mean is this:

Jason got blown up in a warehouse. Peter had a building fall on him. Both of them have the potential to be triggered by closed spaces. Also, Daredevil and Deadpool are basically trauma bags. I bet they have some traumas regarding small spaces. So where the fuck is my red-coded-trauma-buddies fanfic that features Jason and Peter? Where the fuck is my angst? Where the fuck is my crossover Team Red™?!

[hiroyildiz]

BRUHH SHGLAHFKSHFJAHF

Fanfic idea:

When Jason inexplicably gets out of his grave and starts wandering the streets of Gotham it's not Talia who finds him, it's John Constantine.

Jason: *Zombying*

Constantine: Ah! A zombie!

Jason: *Holds his hand*

Constantine: Ah! Attachment!

Tim: What'cha got'cha there mr. Magic User who isn't supposed to be in Gotham?

Constantine: *Holding a dangerous artifact he stole from Tim's house*

Constantine: *Shoves Jason forward* The old Robin.

Tim: Holy overreaction, magic man.

Featuring tired-single-mom-of-two Constantine™, magical side of Jason, Tim's house full of cursed artifacts, League of Assassins in distress and bat-kids making Bruce re-evaluate his life choices by getting involved with sorcery.

[hiroyildiz]

Lmao babe, you're absolutely right. But that's why this idea is fucking hilarious. That's why we must do this. 'Cuz even if this ends badly, it still will be pretty funny.

Fanfic idea:

When Jason inexplicably gets out of his grave and starts wandering the streets of Gotham it's not Talia who finds him, it's John Constantine.

Jason: *Zombying*

Constantine: Ah! A zombie!

Jason: *Holds his hand*

Constantine: Ah! Attachment!

Tim: What'cha got'cha there mr. Magic User who isn't supposed to be in Gotham?

Constantine: *Holding a dangerous artifact he stole from Tim's house*

Constantine: *Shoves Jason forward* The old Robin.

Tim: Holy overreaction, magic man.

Featuring tired-single-mom-of-two Constantine™, magical side of Jason, Tim's house full of cursed artifacts, League of Assassins in distress and bat-kids making Bruce re-evaluate his life choices by getting involved with sorcery.

[hiroyildiz]

Hmmm... Okay, there are 2 ways I see this going:

1- Constantine: What'cha got'cha there Timothy?

Tim: *One hand holding Cass' hand and the other holding Shiva's bo-staff* A bo-staff that I stole from one of the most dangerous women in the world.

Constantine: Holy shit.

Tim: *smirking* how the turntables, magic man.

2- Bruce: Where is the black haired little girl that I stole from Shiva?

Alfred: She is out with her friends.

Bruce: She has friends?

Alfred: Most healthy people do, sir. Of course, you are the exception.

Cass: *Hanging out with Constantine, Jason and Tim in a house full of cursed artifacts, thinking* Gotta protect the idiot little brothers and idiot smoking man. They won't survive the wilderness.

Alfred 100% bullies Bruce to become friends with Constantine btw. Constantine thinks Bruce is flirting and isn't sure whether that should turn him on or weird him out. On one hand the man is gorgeous and on the other hand they have so many kids between them, it's like they are ex-husbands.

Fanfic idea:

When Jason inexplicably gets out of his grave and starts wandering the streets of Gotham it's not Talia who finds him, it's John Constantine.

Jason: *Zombying*

Constantine: Ah! A zombie!

Jason: *Holds his hand*

Constantine: Ah! Attachment!

Tim: What'cha got'cha there mr. Magic User who isn't supposed to be in Gotham?

Constantine: *Holding a dangerous artifact he stole from Tim's house*

Constantine: *Shoves Jason forward* The old Robin.

Tim: Holy overreaction, magic man.

Featuring tired-single-mom-of-two Constantine™, magical side of Jason, Tim's house full of cursed artifacts, League of Assassins in distress and bat-kids making Bruce re-evaluate his life choices by getting involved with sorcery.

[hiroyildiz]

Mother FUCKER-

GUYS

GUYS

Constantine can summon a fucking demon that will drag Joker to hell!

It ain't like they're killing him either they're just sending him to hell WHERE HE BELONGS!!!!

YES! YES! THIS IS THE BEST IDEA I'VE EVER HAD!!!!

Joker: *being dragged to hell by a literal fucking demon* Hey you! You are a hero! Save me!!!

Constantine:

Jason:

Tim:

Tim: *Giving a thumbs up* Fuck him up guys.

Joker: *Screams in ugly mutter fuccer*

Fanfic idea:

When Jason inexplicably gets out of his grave and starts wandering the streets of Gotham it's not Talia who finds him, it's John Constantine.

Jason: *Zombying*

Constantine: Ah! A zombie!

Jason: *Holds his hand*

Constantine: Ah! Attachment!

Tim: What'cha got'cha there mr. Magic User who isn't supposed to be in Gotham?

Constantine: *Holding a dangerous artifact he stole from Tim's house*

Constantine: *Shoves Jason forward* The old Robin.

Tim: Holy overreaction, magic man.

Featuring tired-single-mom-of-two Constantine™, magical side of Jason, Tim's house full of cursed artifacts, League of Assassins in distress and bat-kids making Bruce re-evaluate his life choices by getting involved with sorcery.

[hiroyildiz]

He is World's Greatest Ho- ahem- Master of the Dark Arts.

Fanfic idea:

When Jason inexplicably gets out of his grave and starts wandering the streets of Gotham it's not Talia who finds him, it's John Constantine.

Jason: *Zombying*

Constantine: Ah! A zombie!

Jason: *Holds his hand*

Constantine: Ah! Attachment!

Tim: What'cha got'cha there mr. Magic User who isn't supposed to be in Gotham?

Constantine: *Holding a dangerous artifact he stole from Tim's house*

Constantine: *Shoves Jason forward* The old Robin.

Tim: Holy overreaction, magic man.

Featuring tired-single-mom-of-two Constantine™, magical side of Jason, Tim's house full of cursed artifacts, League of Assassins in distress and bat-kids making Bruce re-evaluate his life choices by getting involved with sorcery.

[hiroyildiz]

Babe, they're gonna kick the league's ass(in a funny way) what do you think? 😏

Also I didn't know that, I knew Damian got magic for a while but I didn't know it was the same way as Constantine. That's awesome. They shall bond over it.

Fanfic idea:

When Jason inexplicably gets out of his grave and starts wandering the streets of Gotham it's not Talia who finds him, it's John Constantine.

Jason: *Zombying*

Constantine: Ah! A zombie!

Jason: *Holds his hand*

Constantine: Ah! Attachment!

Tim: What'cha got'cha there mr. Magic User who isn't supposed to be in Gotham?

Constantine: *Holding a dangerous artifact he stole from Tim's house*

Constantine: *Shoves Jason forward* The old Robin.

Tim: Holy overreaction, magic man.

Featuring tired-single-mom-of-two Constantine™, magical side of Jason, Tim's house full of cursed artifacts, League of Assassins in distress and bat-kids making Bruce re-evaluate his life choices by getting involved with sorcery.

[hiroyildiz]

AJSKAHDJSHDJSGD

Well, Tim will be sent to confront Constantine but obviously he will say: fuck it and be buddy buddy with the man.

And Dickie Bird might show up but not untill later.

When he does show up tho, he will have that moment but i can't say because of what.

Fanfic idea:

When Jason inexplicably gets out of his grave and starts wandering the streets of Gotham it's not Talia who finds him, it's John Constantine.

Jason: *Zombying*

Constantine: Ah! A zombie!

Jason: *Holds his hand*

Constantine: Ah! Attachment!

Tim: What'cha got'cha there mr. Magic User who isn't supposed to be in Gotham?

Constantine: *Holding a dangerous artifact he stole from Tim's house*

Constantine: *Shoves Jason forward* The old Robin.

Tim: Holy overreaction, magic man.

Featuring tired-single-mom-of-two Constantine™, magical side of Jason, Tim's house full of cursed artifacts, League of Assassins in distress and bat-kids making Bruce re-evaluate his life choices by getting involved with sorcery.

[hiroyildiz]

I FORGOT TO SAY!!!

I think it would be hilarious if they didn't try to hide Jason from Bruce but it still took a lot of time for World's Greatest Detective™ to figure out his dead son was alive again and hanging out with his new protege and a middle aged magic user.

Tim will even try to drop hints, let Bruce know easily, and Bruce will still be like: "I am an IDIOT." (In subtitles)

Fanfic idea:

When Jason inexplicably gets out of his grave and starts wandering the streets of Gotham it's not Talia who finds him, it's John Constantine.

Jason: *Zombying*

Constantine: Ah! A zombie!

Jason: *Holds his hand*

Constantine: Ah! Attachment!

Tim: What'cha got'cha there mr. Magic User who isn't supposed to be in Gotham?

Constantine: *Holding a dangerous artifact he stole from Tim's house*

Constantine: *Shoves Jason forward* The old Robin.

Tim: Holy overreaction, magic man.

Featuring tired-single-mom-of-two Constantine™, magical side of Jason, Tim's house full of cursed artifacts, League of Assassins in distress and bat-kids making Bruce re-evaluate his life choices by getting involved with sorcery.

[hiroyildiz]

Johnny boy travels a lot doesn't he? But i think some of the trips they will take will not be so consensual- the league ahem-

And I am sure he will have an aneurysm when he is inside the Drake Manor for the first time, and second time... And maybe third time...

Maybe one of the artifacts will be the key to restoring Jason's half-sanity so who knows🤗

Fanfic idea:

When Jason inexplicably gets out of his grave and starts wandering the streets of Gotham it's not Talia who finds him, it's John Constantine.

Jason: *Zombying*

Constantine: Ah! A zombie!

Jason: *Holds his hand*

Constantine: Ah! Attachment!

Tim: What'cha got'cha there mr. Magic User who isn't supposed to be in Gotham?

Constantine: *Holding a dangerous artifact he stole from Tim's house*

Constantine: *Shoves Jason forward* The old Robin.

Tim: Holy overreaction, magic man.

Featuring tired-single-mom-of-two Constantine™, magical side of Jason, Tim's house full of cursed artifacts, League of Assassins in distress and bat-kids making Bruce re-evaluate his life choices by getting involved with sorcery.