#yes youre seeing that right
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MIDAS FANS I GET IT
#fortnite#fortnite fanart#midas fortnite#midas#midsummer midas#yes youre seeing that right#i drew FORTNITE FANART of all things#i cant be saved at this point#what more can i even say#like LOOK AT HIM#they gave him a vline and for WHAT#FOR WHAT FORTNITE WHAT WAS THE REASON#LIKE THIS ISNT FAIR#ITS LIKE THEY WANT ME TO NEVER RECOVER#the parasites made me do it#its me im the parasite#do i regret this? no#midas could turn me to gold and id be happy#vioqumins art#my art#rkgk#らくがき
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call out my name when you need me again
if you know who I am, why won’t you call my name?
#shaking u and telling u a soul w no king is an ideal reality song…#YES this is self indulgent and I would draw a whole lot more but I’m lazy!!! Somebody do it for me#p5r#akechi goro#ok… joker is implied#persona 5 protagonist#so… shuake is implied…#shuake#telling uuuuu it’s so ideal reality coded#”but if this is what you want why speak of right and wrong you still go in for the kill you speak of the devil like he’s not your friend”#R U SEEING IT#the joker trying to justify the ideal ending#trying to pretend#Yeah this if definitely not the meaning of the song but cmon. Cmon.#my art#doodle#doodles
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I think depictions of Anya being cruel to Curly or drawing out his suffering are artful and chilling but completely miss the point of the story and her character.
I'm not saying she doesn't deserve to have that "I told you so" moment with him but not in something callous or cold. Even if that is how it happened, she'd immediately feel guilty cause at that point she's not tormenting her tormenter or even the person truly at fault. She's doing something cathartic, similar to how Jimmy likely hits Curly to release rage he can't against the rest of the crew. She'd see herself as no different when she'd come back from the moment and see Curly cowering at her. She wants someone to take responsibility but how does being cruel to the defenseless help? Why would she want the power Jimmy has over her over Curly?
The idea of her extending someone else's pain is just so against the struggles she already faces and how she can't even bring herself to cause someone pain even to help them. Her very desire is to release herself from her own suffering and I doubt she'd even fine some sort of guilty release in being cruel to another.
#anya is not a character i see taking agency or indulging in cathartic behaviors#not knowingly like i see her as a character trapped in her head and maybe in the scenario she's cruel to Curly she is envisioning Jimmy#in his place but its not a story about justice or those deserving of punishment and those not like its the opposite of people projecting#their issues on the wrong people and saying things to the wrong people and doing things they shouldn't but anya uniquely falls out of it as#she is subjected to a lot of it but it is also not something she wants to subject another person to like you are doing what Jimmy does and#placing ur rage into another persons and viewing their actions through your eyes like she'd more likely yell at him than do harm or#cause him more pain like at least make it in character#but also she clearly doesn't want to see jimmy or curly in the same light and doesnt because she still repeatedly goes to Curly for comfort#and protection and god there's like concepts that need to be applied to characters individually and then the story as a whole#we can not view the game through only one themed lens less we forget to inspect the compounding factor of Anya is so much more than girl#that needs to be allowed to go off but a woman that simply wants right to be done by her and no more harm like she doesn't want to be aroun#the suffering like idk but some of yall would just benefit from like understanding that people are inherently grey with the capabilities of#black n white thinking or actions#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anya mouthwashing#i like her the most but then again i am defensive of all women in media and hate when people change the way the character would take agency#for themselves like yes I want her to tweak out but she just wouldn't and I like seeing realistic depictions of a woman suffering the way#she is like shes not the type at the end of the movie to have a one liner but feel a shallow freedom cause she needs to realistically heal#idk but its just like there is an obbsession forming with making her character her pain and not how she handles and navigates the issue
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Charles Rowland truly made of sunshine rainbows and pettiness
#i see you and your 'brat' by charli xcx behavior#he is beauty he is grace he is making fun of you right in your face#am i reusing gifs yes it's called recycling#dead boy detectives#charles rowland
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LIVE LAUGH LOVE FENGQING FOREVER!!!!!
#I am an avid fengqing enjoyer#I LOVE THEM SO MUCH#they are in love your honour#madly in love#fengqing#mu qing#feng xin#tgcf#I have a looooot of doodles from back when I was first reading the books#might post those later? we'll see#heaven official's blessing#tgcf fanart#tian guan ci fu#fengqing fic authors are sooo cool they make every au so awesome sauce#I love modern fengqing a lot :] and them being teenagers back in xianle#Skipsart#fanart#hualian invented love yes but FENGQING???? IT SPEAKS TO MY SOUL I LOVE THEM SO MUCH#it took me so long to draw feng xin's outfit right in the first drawing 💀
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last night i had a dream i had to go to school to take an exam in my young justice (1998) class. and i was bewildered as to what could possibly be on an exam in a yj98 class but i showed up and sat down and got my exam paper. the first question was "which of these medical conditions do you have but have never disclosed?" and it was multiple choice and i don't remember all the options but one of them was "asplenia", and i looked up and in one of the other seats in the classroom, tim drake was sitting there and just Frowning at this exam paper.
#rimi talks#woke up and immediately started laughing#i think one of the other questions was ''have you ever broken a bone on purpose?'' and there was a note like#Do Not snap your finger right now just so you can answer yes to this question. if you just did... go see the nurse... you fool...#what was this dream even 😭😭😭
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"ascended astarion is his bad ending because he becomes an abuser" no its actually his bad ending because he becomes cringy
#like yes youre right#but hes also so. annoying when hes ascended LMAO#are you telling me you prefer him when hes like ughhh get on ur kneeees or whatever the fuck#its the BIGGEST ick in the world to me#i already dont like to romance astarion i dont have anything against it but its just not my thing#hes one of my favourite characters but i like him more as my bestie#just personally#but my gooodddddd every clip of ascended astarion i see its just CRINGE !#bg3#baldurs gate 3#psa i havent played an ascended playthru idk him like that fully#posts im not gonna tag with astarion#shadowheart#gale dekarios#wyll ravengard#karlach#bg3 companions
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I hope leftists who think they’re above voting for president or are voting for Jill Stein or whoever because it’s their stupid way of protesting the system feel good about themselves, especially if Trump wins partly because of your negligence 😍 I know you’re not doing shit to plan the proletarian revolution, especially before January, so you guys better not complain about something harming you that you didn’t even bother to try and change
(edit: changed the last part bc I wrote “…if life gets a lot worse for you” cause that does nottt sound right at all and I apologize for writing that)
#if you have the option to help make change and do nothing then that’s your fault#ah yes! taking absolutely no action! that'll show the corrupt two-party system!#I’m literally a leftist too I don’t like aligning with the democrat party either but like… what other choice do we have right now#why not just vote for the one who sucks less#also you do know Jill Stein and Rudolph Ware don’t give a fuck about you or any leftist issues right#like they’re literally just there to get in the way for people who are too dumb to realize they’re basically just handing a vote to Trump#sorry for my raging here we see that I am very nervous for this election lol#and i know i'm being dramatic i don't actually want life to get worse for anyone but like... if you're anti-trump but don't vote for kamala#you're basically just getting what you asked for#american politics#vote blue#us politics#i know trump supporters are the ones to be angrier with ofc but this type of people are really irritating too#breaking: 20-year-old chronically online tumblr user changes the minds of thousands last-minute by ranting (/s)
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Huzzah! It's birthday time! I'm slowly accumulating more and more things I like (latest additions this vest I made and a travel typewriter! Still need to fix the latter one though)
Sure has been a year.
#terri#niart#got my wisdom toofies out#well 2 out of 4#still got stitches#idk if this removal lowkey fixed my fear of the dentist?#it was so easy and painless#also finally i'm on anxiety meds jkahsdjash#i also got depression meds but i haven't tested them yet#I'm going to see the love of my life soon again!!!#only 2 more months to go....#i've also finally found awesome friends who don't make me feel like i'm insane for wanting to be cared for#the difference is like night and day#old friends saying hey let's surprise another friend of ours oh also i think it's your birthday on that day#new friends reminding me to pick a brunch place for us to go on my special day#i am sobbing#the right people are out there#don't lose hope#i've never felt this platonically loved honestly#also yes i'm working on the next dragon's lair aksjdhasjkd#just#a lot of things happening and i'm sooo burnt out#this piece was such a strain and i just#don't have patience for art rn#this is photobashed btw there's an actual photo of my typewriter under all those layers#i'm not about to spend 300 hours just to draw a typewriter from this angle kajshdjkasdh#ALSO ONE MORE THING CAN I JUST GUSH ABOUT THE ANASTASIA BROADWAY OKAY?!?!?!#I didn't realise until now that they made it way more historically inspired and i mean bruh BRUH#i have been having a recording of it playing on the background nonstop for like 3 days now#Vladimir Popov I want to inject you straight into my veins holy shit he is a perfect man
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MDZS x ISAT part 2: Grandmaster of Time.
(Part 1)
#in stars and time#ISAT#Siffrin#Loop#digital art#I was going to wait a bit longer to post the other side of the swap#but we are coming up to the 'come back to gusu' moment in the audio drama so it has been on my mind.#Yes. That is indeed a screenshot of the demon baby blood cave from The Untamed.#It is so over the top edgy. I love how far WWX leans into his Evil Yiling Laozu role in this arc.#Better yet he invites LWJ over and is so unapologetic about it. It really does feel like a 'damn you live like this?" moment.#I think there are two kinds of friends in this world;#those that see your blood pit cave and say nothing and those that tell you they'll come by tomorrow to help you clean up.#ISAT thought time: I know Loop hangs out under a nice big tree 99% of the time but lets be honest;#If there was a evil bloody cave in the vicinity - that is 100% where they would ask Siffrin to meet them in.#Loop sends texts to their stardust with Ominous black images and says 'Go here. Into the dark.'#That or highly specific IP addresses that are right over sinkholes. Or in graveyards.#Point is; I think Loop and the Yiling Laozu would thrive in each other's aesthetics.
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After seeing @felassan's post about there being two different versions of Neve and Taash's cards, I needed to sate my curiosity and went digging to see if I could different versions of the other companions as well.
Lo and behold, there are! I found them for every companion except for Emmrich. There's no way to say with absolute certainty which is the old version and which is the new; hopefully we can get some confirmation on this.
For the time being, I went ahead and marked the differences for those who have trouble spotting this sort of thing. Hopefully it's not too overwhelming for the ones that are very marked up, but I wanted to include some of the more mundane changes as well.
Neve — The biggest changes are the crossed leg (making her prosthetic more visible) as well as the metal rivet detailing on her outfit (see: the collar, the shoulder pads, the sleeves, the skirt portion). Some of what I'm calling the more "mundane" technical changes include the lighting and shadows on her staff, her nose, and her chest.
Taash — The most notable difference here is the coins (I didn't circle all the individual coins but you get the point) and the dragon in the background. In one version, the eye is more distinct, and a bottom row of teeth have been added to the dragon's jaw. There have also been changes made in the shading of her face. Her body shape (namely, the torso and her arms) have also been changed, as well as the general shape of the "spikes" on her hips and her shoulders.
Harding — Just a couple changes here. Her eye is more white/ghostly looking in one version, and the shading on her face and neck have changed.
Lucanis — LOTS of differences. They're pretty inconsequential, by which I mean there hasn't been any added/removed/changed symbolism in his card. The shading on his nose has changed, as well as the shading on his collar, hand, forearm, armpit (didn't circle this one oops), hips, and hip dagger. The purple "wisps" have changed in shape here and there. One of the orbs in the upper left have moved, and there is another orb above that one which has been removed/added.
Davrin — Just a few changes with Davrin, though they are big ones. His face/head has been changed, and the vallaslin has been redrawn. The scar on his eyebrow has also moved slightly.
Bellara — Bellara's head has shifted and her neck elongated/shortened. There are stars in the background and around her arm in one version.
As for Emmrich, I mentioned I could only find one version. I did compare the image we currently have with what I believe is the earliest Emmrich art that was shared with us (a cropped version of his card) by overlaying the two on Photoshop and didn't see any differences.
And that's it! You might have also noticed that some of the versions on the right hand side have a white line at the top of the image. Make of that what you will.
(People viewing this post on PC will have an easier time quickly clicking back and forth between the images to spot the difference. If you're on the mobile app and care enough to do so, you might have an easier time saving the images and flipping through them in your photo album. At least I know it's easier if you have an iPhone, I don't know about other models.)
#if you spot something I missed please let me know!#da4#da4 spoilers#da:tv#dragon age: the veilguard#da:v#dav#tagging this game is such a headache#neve gallus#neve#taash#harding#lace harding#lucanis dellamorte#lucanis#davrin#bellara lutara#bellara#It's my personal opinion that all the lefthand versions are the newer ones and the righthand are the old#mostly coming at this from an artist's perspective (my belief that the changes made in composition light and shadow are better#in the lefthand versions).#lucanis's card is a good example in why I believe the left image is the newer one. The orb moving more towards the center makes for a#better composition in my opinion. And in the right image there is a random black wisp on his left forearm (our right) that looks like it#shouldn't be there.#but to play devil's advocate the righthand images ARE currently on the official website AND I used the wayback machine#to see what was there before AND IT WAS THE LEFTHAND IMAGES. but also alsoooo I do believe the first versions of art we ever#saw are the righthand images which would make them older. but I can't confirm any of this so really it's all up in the air#anyway neve gallus are you impressed with my sleuthing skills and if your answer is yes please call me. pleas
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Not trying to be rude or anything but you shouldn't use the word 'manic' or 'manic period' etc. unless you actually have manic/depressive episodes because it downplays how severe those disorders can actually be. They're just words but unlearning harmful terminology like that can help destigmatise mental illness and I would hope youi would want to do that.
yeah it's almost like i used those words specifically because i DO understand how severe they are
#ramble#what's that post about how some people only see ideologies and concepts and not human beings#yes we should stop throwing terminology around like nothing but also#that is not the biggest problem neurodivergent people have right now#and also you're asking me to disclose my conditions to strangers so you can decide how i'm allowed to speak#also this isn't the point but i don't know anybody who uses the word 'manic' to describe their symptoms unless they have FELT IT#because it's. so specific and you do not use it unless you know what it means#for me a manic phase doesn't mean just a little energy buzz it feels like i'm on fire#anyway please don't waste your time sending me things like this because i don't like it#go after etsy shops who sell ocd merchandise not people talking about their own struggles
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you know what really pisses me off? so many people acting like he is the worst person out there and no one will miss him. A LOT of people are grieving now and missing him including people that these people supposedly follow and care about. liam was not the supervillain people wanted him to be. he was messed up and did messed up things likely because of what happened to him. this conversation deserves so much more nuance than people are giving it. and maybe it’s too early to have this conversation now but it’s helping me process and grieve so i’m really writing this for me. people are complex and doing bad things doesn’t make you a bad person or someone worthy of death without being given the chance to make things right. and another thing, it is SO hypocritical to make fun of him and look down on him like he’s the ultimate Bad Guy meanwhile i bet every single person you have ever admired in the spotlight has likely also done bad things or at least things you wouldn’t be proud of. fame is an illness and it can cause people to harm others because they were hurt themselves. human beings are a culmination of everything that they’ve been through and everything they’ve done. he is not only the bad things he’s done and it’s okay and normal to grieve him as a whole person, because he was one.
#i’m glad most people are asleep right now so i could write this#i’m just so fed up with all the jokes on his behalf#people are IN PAIN. i’m sick to my stomach#liam wasn’t evil. he was messed up clearly otherwise he wouldn’t have been so intoxicated#man’s it drives me to insanity that these people who ‘stan’ an artist any artist could be so hypocritical right now#you don’t KNOW these people. they are famous and fame is an illness#it fucks up your brain and makes you do shitty things and act in ways people and yourself dont even recognize#EVERY celebrity has done something shitty in their lives and will continue to do so because that’s the price of admission#yes it was serious what he has done and that shouldn’t be swept under the rug but people are more than their worst moments#i feel so sick and dizzy over this. seeing all this shit about him everywhere is making me ill. i wish it would stop#i also feel for maya. this post isn’t to erase her trauma and experience at all. she has every right to speak her truth.#just have more compassion for people on all sides for christ’s sake#where is the humanity#grief#death tw#lp
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GEMINI NORAWIT as HEART and FOURTH NATTAWAT as LI MING in MOONLIGHT CHICKEN (2023) for @loversmore
#moonlight chicken#heartliming#heart#li ming#gemini norawit#fourth nattawat#mlcedit#bledit#dailyasiandramas#thaidramaedit#mine.gif#surprise…#happy 3 years to us 🥺#i made 20 gifs for this (yes again) remind me to send u the rest in dms#for u :( cause u loved them even more than tinngun (crazy i know right)#143ily🤟 jubjub#<3liming sequel next we will wait 👍#im already laughing u will lose your mind when u see this notif hrjdssjsek#also happy folklore day but thats zweitrangig#its not really golden but#golden like daylight / if i was a blue bird / you bring blue lights to dreams#oki bye thanku for 3 years of dealing with me...<3
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CHARLIE MAGNE from HAZBIN HOTEL (2019): Pilot - "That's Entertainment" ↳ "So, I've been thinking: Isn't there a more humane way to hinder overpopulation here in Hell? Perhaps we can create an alternative way to change souls through... redemption?"
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel edit#hazbin charlie#charlie magne#hazbin edit#requested#hazbin hotel pilot#that's entertainment#charlie#my gifs#god ain't she the cutest little thing!#not gonna lie i get a bit emotional seeing her do The Pose during ''wonderful fantastic new hotel''#it's the same pose she does in the S1 poster :')#okay actually im back here to say some things in the tags:#holy almighty LORD these gave me so much grief to color in a way i thought looked nice#specifically the one of her in the news chair. sorry i was NOT gonna let that hideous highlighter green color assault all your eyeballs.#did i lose nearly two hours of sleep getting it right because i still have no idea what i'm doing? yes. worth it? YES. ohh yes.#i liked the seafoam look so i made the cloud sequence match :] or at least tried to#there WAS supposed to be another one of her in the news room but i just hated how it kept turning out so i scrapped it.#coloring the main series was one thing to learn but the PILOT? never has it been so obvious to me just how much more bright and vibrant#the colors got during the progression of the world design. also. if by any chance one of those cool and experienced#gif makers happens to see these tags and wants a good laugh: i've been doing this for how many months now? and just last NIGHT figured out#how to use the fucking eraser in photoshop....... thing is... i also draw. i KNOW what program tools look like. i KNOW ppl draw in PS.#i'm just a really silly fuckin goose!! TEEHEE FUCKING HEE I GUESS!#so for months i've been like ''god i wish i could just erase this part from the layer'' and looking at the eraser tool and just being like#''nah it's probably different and weird i'll just stick to what i know'' -> said boo boo the FOOL#see i could be in the club but i'd rather be aggressively neurodivergent about the silly queer demon cartoon that altered my brain chemical
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Making sense of love for love's sake: the game
Despite all the things i absolutely adore about how the plot unravels and expands in love by love's sake, upon first watch, there's some things i couldn't piece together, which @lurkingshan echoes in their post:
'The way the author was messing with Myungha and forcing cruel choices on him really does not track with a desire to help him find happiness.'
And to preface, this is not something i fully get yet either. I think i'll need a good month and a sizeable reading list of relevant resources to understand just what/who this author/sunbae is and what his role is and how he is associated with myungha. But as always with the best shows for meta (aka bad buddy), as a plot unfolds, you can always find a better understanding by looking backwards and re-contextualising what you've already seen. so i watched ep 1, specifically the scene between myungha and his sunbae at the bar. And i will talk about how everything said in this scene has a whole new meaning now we know the full story, but for now i wanna focus on that question that they keep coming back to; "Then... will you change it for him?".
When you watch the show for the first time, your brain follows the simplest, most obvious version of the story you're being told, one where myungha has been pulled into the world of his sunbae's novel that's being turned into a game and given the opportunity to fix the thing he didn't like about it; making yeowoon happy, and thus you just think the rules of the game are imposed by the author, and so when these cruel choices first come up, you see them as the difficult roadblocks that are nevertheless necessary to any kind of game, forcing the player to make an impossible choice so that the game can continue in a certain direction and its only after that you learn whether it was the right choice or not, or there is no right choice, it simply changes the game you are playing.
And when its revealed what this game actually is, at first i tried to interpret these cruel choices, namely the choice between yeonwoon and myungha's grandma, and at best i could come up with the concept of this being a choice between staying stuck to the past aka choosing his grandma, even though he knows that choice doesn't mean she's safe bc he knows the future where he loses here, its an inevitability, but thats the small happiness he knew before it was taken away and thus that happiness is known and safe, theres no risk, versus choosing to pursue a new happiness, a love of yeowoon and thus himself, which he doesn't know, he hasn't experienced yet, and could be risky. Its a happiness that isn't guaranteed like his grandma, but its a happiness that looks to the future and has hope in it that he can find a new happiness to pursue despite what has happened in his past.
And that fits nice, okayish. But then i watched ep 1 and heard that question "Then... will you change it for him?" And watching through the rest of the eps, we come back to this scene at the bar and each time we get a new run up to the author asking this question, either new dialogue is added or we hear a different piece of the conversation entirely. It starts at the beginning of ep 1 as:
"Because Cha Yeowoon is the only one who's miserable." "It can't be helped that some people's lives are like that" "The fact that some people are destined to live that kind of life is what's vile."
Then a bit later in ep 1 we go back and its expanded.
"It can't be helped that some people's lives are like that" "The fact that some people are destined to live that kind of life is what's vile." "Why? Do you think you'd write it differently?" "Yes, definately. Someone like Cha Yeowoon, or someone like me with an awful life, can also be happy."
And then all the way on in ep 6, we get this new dialogue.
"I don't like talking about destiny." "Why?" "Because it means everything is predestined." "Then do you not believe in fate?" "Fate and destiny are the same. My grandma likes to say that. She said life is like a written book, and how you'll live and die are written in it. (...)I don't like things like this. Even if fate is already destined, I think it can still be changed. Otherwise, there's no point in trying." "Really? Then Myungha..."
And while we don't hear the author ask the same question, I feel like him getting cut off like that insinuates that the conversation leads to that same ending point. All that is to say, every time we hear this question being asked, its like we learn more and more about what this whole thing is, what the game is, what myungha is saying he will do by agreeing to do what the author asks. And every time, we see myungha being more defiant against the idea of yeowoon being resigned to his miserable ending. He starts off thinking that kind of life is destined, and while it's miserable, its not something he can fight. Then he says he'd want to write the story differently, bc yeowoon, or even him, could be happy. He challenges the idea that yeowoon, and thus himself, is fated to be miserable, and opens up the possibility for happiness for them both, but doesn't yet have the means or resolve to do it, its like he knows its possible on a fundamental level, but doesn't see it as something he can actually achieve. But then we circle back to the idea of destiny and books, both of which came up in the previous quote, and seems incredibly pertinent seen as this whole thing is about a novel this author has written. Myungha talks about how he hates the idea that life is a book where everything written is predestined to happen, from the moment you live to the moment you die. He says "Even if fate is already destined, I think it can still be changed. Otherwise, there's no point in trying." That vile way of life he described before that he said was destined, he is now saying it can be changed, and that possibility is now something he's holding onto, its what he sees hope in so that he can keep trying, bc now he finally is trying, he has the resolve, he's trying to realise this thing, this impossibility of rewriting the life he thought was destined through the way he loves yeowoon.
And coming back to those cruel choices, given this fresh context, it made me think. bc this isn't actually a game that myungha has been put into where the rules are dictated by an author completely separate from him. He said himself, he'd rewrite it, he'd change things for yeowoon. And when you start to think of it less as him fighting against a rigid, removed system and more like him being a character in a story he is trying to rewrite himself, that has both the author and his own limitations, or just his own if you're in the school of thought that the author is some figment or part of myungha himself or his conciousness, then you can start to see where these cruel choices might come from. They could be myungha, the author making edits to this new story, imposing his own doubts and limitations on himself. When he says he has to pick between Yeowoon and his grandma, what if that's the new author myungha seeing this story unfold and thinking no this isn't right, he can't have it all, i'm not deserving of this much happiness.
And what makes me like this idea even more is that when we get that second choice between ending after 14 days or getting 100 days back at the cost of resetting Yeowoon's affection to 0, that whole conversation happens in what I think the bar actually is which is this frozen moment in time where myungha is in the water with this extension of a voice in his head that is talking through these things. That conversation in itself needs its own post, but when you look at it both as a decision to break up or not or a decision to hold onto life or not, you can see how the author is just this soundboard relaying the decisions myungha is going through in his head. The author's voice is his own, weighing up his decisions. And if he is the author here, it only reinforces that the person making the rules of this game is him. You can even extend it further to the idea of the debuffs, where he puts in place this thing that makes it so he causes harm to yeowoon when he's around, and its only by garnering affection that he can prevent it. He gives himself a reason from the get go to stay away from yeowoon and reason it as him doing it for yeowoon's safety, when in fact the only way to make yeowoon safe is to increase his affection, which he can only do by being near him. Its a system that at first gives myungha a reason to stay away aka not like himself, but ultimately says the only way you're going to make yeowoon like you, or the only way you can like yourself, is if you accept risk. And that in itself screams to me of a myungha writing in these game systems that are trying to encourage his own-self love while falling at the hurdle of his own lack of self-worth.
The idea is still messy in my head even for me, but i just really like the idea that myungha could be trying to fix this thing both as a character and game master, and that both these versions of him have these flaws that manifest in their different ways to cause the events we see. It kinda is the definition of being your own worst enemy, the idea that in order to work towards loving yourself, the biggest obstacle you have to encounter is yourself, bc we are the ones holding ourselves back, making all these rules that make it harder to like ourselves and pursue our own happiness. The voices in our head telling us that we aren't good enough and aren't deserving are our own, and while the things that happen to us can inform what they say, we're the one's reinforcing those words. And what this show teaches us is that, if we're the one holding that pen all along, we can choose to change what those words are. If we make the rules, you don't have to create a game with concrete ultimatums, you can create a game where rules don't control you. Instead, you make the decisions, and you can make the ones that make you happy.
#wow look at me writing actual kinda thought out meta#also something something about how the pen being in his pocket wasnt a pen given to him by the author its a pen that was his the whole time#look even if this isnt the right interpretation as intended by the author i just kinda adore this headcanon ive come up with and i cant wai#to rewatch the show again through this lens and see if it holds up#i just adore the idea of this whole thing being this manifestation of a flawed doubtful person trying to navigate through their own messy#nonsensical thoughts to find their own happiness#bc yes thats what triggered me thinking of this whole thing. me seeing that post and thinking yeah that doesnt make sense7#but then again when you tell yourself things an put your own mental blocks in the way they dont make sense either but you still have to fin#the ways to work around them in order to find happiness#like those things dont go away we just find the loopholes or the ways to overcome them that mean we can be happy#the game is your own mind - deal with your own existential crisis as you wish#anyway this is only part 1 in what i hope will be a very extensive meta analysis of this show - stay tuned#love for love's sake
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