#we're still in the process of moving
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Visit Tumblr Blog
Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.
Last Seen Tumblr Blogs
Fun Fact
BuzzFeed published a report claiming that Tumblr was utilized as a distribution channel for Russian agents to influence American voting habits during the 2016 presidential election in Feb 2018.
Text
What's this hairy potato??
Oh it's a dog
#marte#borzoi#russian wolfhound#sighthound#dogblr#snootblr#we're still in the process of moving#hello from a hotel in Dallas!#food lookalike
17 notes
·
View notes
Text
#idc if there is new material WE AS A SOCIETY MOVED ON FROM THIS TOO FAST#choi san#san#ateez#ateez gif#san gif#maxsixgif#that's the problem with kpop: it moves so fast#you've barely processed one era but they've already moved onto the next#i still have not processed Guerrilla era and we're two eras beyond that#the lighting on his face here was amazing though#one of his best styling eras for sure#From The Real MV shoot#i just randomly came across this again today
668 notes
·
View notes
Text
the bittersweet but absolute flood of relief that comes from admitting defeat at living independently, to have to move back in with parents. we tried! we gave it our best shot for almost 3 years! but living like this (being on our own) is just not possible for us at this time of our lives. we've finally proved it to ourselves that we can't do it. it'll be okay to let ourselves rest now
#latimers parents not mine!!!! i am NOT moving back to florida LOL#really hope that the changes will be good for my mental health. this apartment is toxic to us#ive been on the verge of meltdowns Kind Of A Lot lately. imnot doing great#extremely dependent on substances. just to reach a baseline level of functioning. but even that isnt working as much anymore#the only things i do on my phone or tablet these days is like. 2 mobile games. and skirting past my dms to check latimers blog#its too overwhelming to even open discord these days yknow. everything on earth is too much for me right meow#i havent been drawing i havent been social online OR irl i havent been cooking or creating#i havent been keeping up with personal hygiene like at all im particularly ashamed about that one#i've been really bad about doing my T the past few months which is a HUGE shame because im SO fucking hyped to be on it#theres just. too many obstacles in getting it done half the time. and the other half of the time i just forget#anyway. anyway.#our lease ends in july so between now and then we're just gonna try our best to tolerate our living situation enough to get by#there's a light at the end of the tunnel. and its called 'i only have to be in charge of like 2 rooms at most. and not a household!'#we're gonna try to slowly comb through all our things between now and then so the process of moving wont suck as bad#cuz listen. its pretty fucking bad right now#maybe not for other people. but it is for me. and its okay to let myself come to terms with that#im just. so relieved. still very stressed! but theres at least light at the end of the tunnel and its only like 2 months away#ill be able to draw guilt-free again. ill be able to just EXIST guilt-free#i dont think ive felt guilt-free for just existing the way i do since like. turning 20#i know my mom wouldve loved if i stayed home forever. and im sad i cant be there for her#but ever since i had a fight with my dad at 15 or 16 it just really felt like he didnt want me there more and more#maybe as the youngest he was resenting that i was preventing him from becoming an empty nester or something. i dont know#because all the other kids had been moved out and on their own at least once but i had never left home before#i dont know if he'd be heartbroken or not to hear that i feeling like he was resenting me. but thats the energy i was picking up for years#i dunno. i dont know#anyway. back to housing. for now im going to try to relax and store energy for the moving process#the huge pile of things by the kitchen? i dont have to worry about that becoming permanent because we're leaving in 2 months#the general discord of the state of our possessions? we have to go through everything to pack it all anyway. we can move in RIGHT this time#when we moved in here we didnt have a car or license so we were dependent on latimers 3-hr-drive-away parents to help us move#just /across town/. and we had a whole month between leases! but it still had to be done in a weekend
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
..
#weight loss cw for the following tags#i need to word vomit some stuff out#pain stuff recently got super bad#like i was waking up crying bc it was so bad and i could barely move#and ive been doing pain management stuff with my doctor and hit a bit of a wall#so im trying to lose weight to see if that will improve stuff#BUT my pcos makes losing weight stupid hard even without the pain making exercise suck hard#so we're in the process trying some drugs to help and see if we can get things started and my metabolism back on track#and mentally its been a v weird few days coming to terms with it#partly bc of frustrations about my body just never doing what i want it to#im fine with getting the help i need but i just wish my body wasnt fighting me on every front#and partly bc if i lose the amount of weight im hoping to it will be an obvious change#and i know some people in my life are going to make v unkind comments#and im dreading that already#which i know is my anxiety spiraling and catastrophising#but its still stuck in my head and making this harder#especially bc i dont want to lose weight for aesthetic purposes so i dont want those ppl commenting on my body#but there will be no avoiding it. i must mentally prepare for it
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
weekend melancholy is starting to kick in >~<
#im gonna go and do my food shop etc to keep myself busy and hopefully my 2nd meds will kick in and we'll be able to handle it together#i think i kind of do this so regularly bc my brain is just processing everything bc i dont rly have time during the week#all cool tho im doing good overall def on the up n i feel way more capable of coping emotionally which is nice. i <3 meds#also.. possibly settling on the idea that i might be agender. very tentatively. lots of experiences n thoughts coming together rn#ive been reacting in unexpected ways to a lot of gendered shit atm which has made me reconsider the way i think abt myself#but very difficult to articulate it to myself let alone anyone else. so ive been sitting with it for now until it precipitates#gender stuff has never rly affected me much or ive never been in a place to explore it which is why i havent thought abt it super hard#but im not the sort of person who needs a lot of internal exploration to figure out my identity like im v self aware tbh#and while im wildly indecisive abt most things in my life for some reason i never have been abt stuff like this. i learned abt lesbianism#like idk 9 years ago-ish and straight away was like yeah that makes sense for me. never looked back since#n similarly ive experienced forms of gender dysphoria before n just immediately dealt with it symptomatically n moved on#its never been smth to agonise abt for me like i know what makes me comfortable in my skin so theres no question abt doing it#and ik im privileged to be able to do that. and also it helps that gender for me is mostly divorced from external perceptions#+ that im v autistic so social pressures dont stick to me very well. i mean yeah i was bullied for it as a kid but i was stubborn asf#so yeah from the moment i realised i was genuinely uncomfortable/upset abt it earlier this week i was like okay. lets try this instead#its given me pretty instant relief from any distress i was feeling so far which is nice. rare respite from one of my torture labyrinths#just testing out internally whether it frames things more clearly n makes me feel more myself/at peace before i choose to stick w the idea#but not gonna do a whole coming out fanfare either way. dont think i wanna change how ppl interact w me + im still a dyke#so i dont consider it relevant to anyone else unless they share a similar understanding of gender to me. or if we're v close#ill prolly broach it w other trans friends eventually bc insert philosophers talking image. but to everyone else its business as usual#happy to play my cis-sona at work. + w new queer ppl i meet ive been introducing myself recently w mirrored pronouns instead of any/all#and i think i prefer that. virtually indistinguishable but theres smth nice abt inviting ppl to recognise me the way they do themselves#like translating + localising a non-gendered language into a gendered one... simplifying decisions abt how to perceive me#and ofc ppl are still gonna perceive me however but idc much unless we're actually friends. the rest is all a performance anyway#doubtful anyone on here ever has reason to refer to me but if u do for some reason... im freeloading off ur pronouns now btw <3#but yeahhh. much 2 think abt. i need to read more alien/ai sci fi.. non-human sentience has been such a comforting concept lately#but yea tldr i woke up one morning this week like damn im prolly agender but i have a full time job to go to rn so idc abt that#.diaries#okkkk my dex is kicking in im no longer on the verge of tears lets go get these groceries wooohoooo
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#you know. i never really liked the sound of rain or how it looks outside when it storms#but i moved into my apartment yesterday and last night while I was unpacking it was raining pretty bad#and I think theres something poetic about me stopping the video I was watching and sitting on my bed to listen to the rain for a while#i have a lot of good things in my life right now. im not used to having good things. im not used to letting myself have good things#its a process we're slowly learning. but im glad to be here. and im looking around my bedroom still processing that this is mine#i turn 26 later this month and my birthday is always a rough time for me bc I get older but I would always feel stuck#but for once in my life. i think ill be okay.#anyway all of this to say is I have a semi busy day ahead of me and I need to shower but im afraid bc idk how my new shower works#that thang looks like some sort of contraption and I havent learned the secrets yet but such is life and a part of growing up#cal.txt#sorry for my weird poetic rambling i didnt feel like there was enough here for my collection of poetry google docs
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#this might be both oversharing and being too vague rn but it's 2am and i'm emotionally exhausted#i can't believe during one of the most traumatic moments i've had in the past year i was lucky enough to have scott as my biggest supporter#the entire time as i was going through it he was so supportive giving me space to process shit and always having my back#and yet there are some people in my life who are always going to villainize him for one comment he said during that time out of context#or even if they're not ''villainizing'' him i now feel like i have to begin every sentence about scott with#''yeah we don't agree on everything but we're still friends and isn't that amazing!''#which yeah that is true and i do genuinely enjoy when scott and i disagree and are respectful about it#BUT WHY DOES THAT HAVE TO BE THE FIRST THING I SAY ABOUT HIM????#and honestly that whole experience made me agree with scott on way more than i started out with#i'm proud of how i was able to grow as a person and for the fact that it brought me and scott much closer together#but that shit i went through at my college was still traumatic. and it did change me as a person#it completely changed my relationship to activism in a way i'm not happy about bc i want to be more of an activist#but when i had someone use social justice language to justify horrible things against me it's hard not to be wary#of how hollow and performative a lot of conversations can be#and like i'll even say it. like people might get mad at me for admitting it#but that whole traumatic situation has irrevocably changed my relationship to gender as well#or at least how i label myself and how i move through these conversations#and in some ways i'm grateful for it bc i do feel like i know myself more and like i don't have to worry about what others' think#or even what other people understand#but it shouldn't have had to go down like that. and as much as the time i got to spend with scott during that time was so much fun#and such a great experience and he was truly the perfect support system during that time#he shouldn't have had to deal with that and neither should i#and the fact that scott somehow got villainized in some people's minds while the person who actually caused that trauma#is instead treated like ''yeah he was a bit misguided and made a mistake but he was probably anxious about it!! he's just a person!!''#that's never going to stop being painful. especially the idea that with the importance people put on labels#i would supposedly have more ''community solidarity'' with that asshole than a cis gay man like scott#idk i think i'm past the timeframe of that traumatic experience bc it's not consuming every day like it used to a few weeks back#but something triggered it tonight so i just need to process it. anyway shoutout to scott for being there for me i really needed it
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
hmm. had an actual conversation with nightmare coworker today that seemed mutually productive. she apologized for saying some bullshit that hurt my feelings and i clarified that my intentions are to help not to undermine her, and we both agreed that there's no competition against each other and that it's the lack of growth in our role that's the problem. it was...productive.
and further cementing for me that it is time to begin making my Exit. i will be sending out my resume to a few places this weekend.
i'm still processing the conversation, and am struggling to place myself in where i am responsible to better my behavior. because i genuinely don't want to be an ass, even though i really don't like this lady and will jump for joy the day i never have to see her again. she stated that she knows my intentions aren't to hurt her, and that she thinks i'm very kind. i apologized for if my behavior came off as undermining her, and said that my intentions are only to better my own growth—and that i know she's trying to succeed too. i validated her feelings, and complemented the effort she is putting in.
where i'm struggling with is: am i in the wrong/causing harm and needing to change if the issue is that her feelings are incongruent with what she knows of my intentions? her feelings are her responsibility (WOW i almost typed "her feelings are my responsibility". i feel like that's a freudian slip) and she states that she knows i don't mean to hurt her. i'm going to try to be more clear in wording my intentions with her (she feels like me trying to take work off her plate is to undermine her. when really, i'm caught up and see her getting overwhelmed, and i want to help and also have something to do since i'm bored).
but i'm really struggling to look at my role in this and pass judgement on myself. i can and want to do better, and i don't think i did anything wrong, but i'm always so hesitant to say it's not my fault or i didn't do something bad. like i can't trust my judgement on that. my intentions were good, her bad feelings are ones caused by her insecurities, which she more or less has expressed to be aware that they are not true—the hurtful thing she said to me, she acknowledged was said out of hurt and not what she actually thinks. so, is it fair to say i'm not the bad guy? i'm not in the wrong? i know good intentions that still result in harm don't absolve anyone, but when the things that are clashing are insufficient communication and reactive insecurities... i'm not a monster, am i?
#well. i AM probably a monster for how much i dislike this lady#but i don't ACT on it#and i genuinely couldn't care less about her. i participate in decent human pleasantries because i am a decent human.#and at work we're stuck together#the thing that's irked me so much about this conversation is just.. her self centeredness#that she thinks everyone is out to get her. to undermine her. whatever.#bitch nobody cares about you enough one way or the other to put in that kind of effort. i sure don't#i empathize but i do not sympathize. to feel that pit that makes you feel like the worst kind of center of attention#i get it. but genuinely you are not the main character and no one is going to spend their limited time and energy to slowly attack you#you are not the cat with all the knives pointed at it#it's a terrible feeling to feel like you are! but when it influences your behavior to the point that you are making snide comments#to people who have no option not to interact with you then uh. then you're in the wrong buddy#and the people around you (who cannot easily leave! bc work!) should not have to bend over backwards to assure you#that they're not pointing knives at you. to protect themselves from your feelings making you say mean shit#like yes. i can be more clear with my intentions. i'm generally not the greatest at that. but my baseline that i want to#modify my behavior from is NOT one that a regular well adjusted person would take as anything but kind#and if a regular well adjusted person got a little offput by me volunteering to take work off their hands we would've had a very chill#3 sentence conversation about it MONTHS AGO.#i understand and respect (even if i find it annoying and overbearing) the need for me to announce my intentions like im working in a kitchen#and saying 'hot water' or 'knife' as i move around other people but we shouldn't have reached this conclusion this way#and frankly who's to fucking say me being more clear with my intentions will only feed the flames of her thinking i'm out to get her!#'i caught up on my stuff and your plate looks full. i'm bored. anything i can do to help?' could be a pointed knife for all i know!!#and if it is- and my actions still hurt her in that scenario- am i still responsible for the hurt caused??#like WHERE DOES IT FUCKING E N D ?#personal#*exhales* okay i feel better now#i just hate talking about my interactions with her bc i just want NOTHING to do with it. i want her out of my head!!#but until i process it i can't let go#and i'm still going to have to go over all of this with my shrink tomorrow#it just makes me mad how much of my time this bitch takes up. i'm not getting paid to think about work right now!!!!
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
How I, the most burnt out piece of toast, felt saying goodbye and leaving my job of 5 years yesterday
#what i'm learning is that after a 5ish year point#leaving a job has a bizarre familial sort of vibe to it#you're weirdly sentimental about people and things that were nothing but infuriating to you this whole goddamned time#not in a 'i regret leaving' way#but more in a 'i am seeing these people and things in a way that makes me realize i have grown and learned something from this' way#a weird sort of gratitude that tools useful to you in the future#can be forged directly out of the shittiness that you need to move on from#assuming you're willing and able to put in the work to make that happen#if that makes sense#we're still processing#it's bittersweet as hell#but i'm ultimately happy to have gotten into the delorean in time to lightning myself back to the future
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
I hate moving but I can nawt Wait to be out of this apartment 😭
#still not fully processed that I'm moving because well folks if we're being honest it was a deeply impulsive decision#but godd every day I become more and more glad#I'm always so careful to be quiet when I'm up and pretty sure other ppl are asleep#the floors are so loud but I try to walk as softly as posdible yknow#but every time I happen to be awake during 'normal sleeping hours'#when one would rightfully assume I am not conscious#and my housemate is awake#she's. SO loud#absolutely no care that I might be asleep#it just feels so rude?#there's lots of stuff like that like she expects certain courtesies but then does not return them#anyway. just a week left.#ghost posts#text
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
as a person w so goddamn much medical trauma the thought of having to go through the process to find a new doctor that is not just simply compatible w me, but who is also, like. u know. an actually nice, understanding person who will put genuine effort into taking proper care of me is so taxing. like i wish it was a simpler process, but it's not. bc i gotta deal w the very real possibility that by having to go through this process, my medical trauma will be worsened even further. & it is already bad enough that i have panic attacks every time i have to go to any sort of medical facility.
im literally so fucking furious over how much this happens. & that there's no fucking consequence for doing it to a Human Being. for tossing a Human Being that needs medical care aside like a piece of fucking trash. the american healthcare system is such a stupid fucking joke.
#mine#and it sucks bc tbh im at a point where i rly wish i could say 'fuck it' & just. not bother.#but i dont have a choice bc im on daily medications that i cant abruptly stop & Have to take to function#like i literally dont even know how to like. deal w processing the doctor my family has had for potentially decades just dropping me#outta nowhere. like damn i literally cant even trust the doctor literally my entire immediate family has seen for YEARS#to fucking give a shit abt me.#ive been through such an absurd amount of betrayals this year i literally feel like a broken shell of a person#im numbing. i really fucking am. what the fuck else am i sposed to do.#like... literally i feel so nauseous over this shit.#no warning. no head's up. just 'oh btw we're not treating [them] anymore.'#like ?????????????????#bruh this year has fucking brutalized my dissociation. i literally dont feel like a real person w feelings anymore.#bc ive just been treated like a piece of shit that's an inconvenience & a burden & worth more effort than i deserve to be granted.#it's so... just... idk. man. i dont even have it in me to be sad or hurt anymore#im just so fucking burnt out & exhausted. ive been wallowing in merciless agony since i had to move back in w my parents#i am genuinely BARELY surviving at this point & Still shit just Keeps Piling On.#i literally dont know what to do w myself anymore. im trying as hard as i fucking can but holy fucking shit.#i already have way less energy to spare than the average person bruh. it's ridiculous#im sick of being told it'll be ok. im sick of being told ppl feel sorry for me.#im sick of complaining. im sick of being miserable. im sick of feeling like this.#i just want to be done w all the hardships im so fucking exhausted i dont wanna be a person anymore man.#also like. v fucking taxing bc not every doctor can nor will prescribe my adhd meds.#so. like. that's also terrifying. nauseating to deal with.#i literally just want to give up bruh and not even in a suicidal way like i just am so sick of trying for nothing#i could do nothing at all and still be put through bullshit im over it all im so fucking over it.#never in my life has being told 'it'll be ok' felt more dismissive than it does this year but my god. does it feel so dismissive & taxing.#ive literally never not been more not okay than i have been this year. & i continuously get more brutalized no matter what.#it's exhausting as shit just let me fucking breathe what the fuck jfc.
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
in the final season of this love story with INFJ...
See below the link if you want my musings.
I think I’ve come to terms with love is not all you need in a relationship! At least for me, there is an aspect of choice and what you’ll accept from someone... which it seems like I’ve always known but hadn’t put it to words until very recently.
INFJ and I went out quite a lot in the past couple of months but it was very ‘situationship’ given that I knew he was coming out of a relationship and wanted to leave the country for a short time. I helped him with his application letters and read thru his letters of rec and when this man finally asked me if we should try again. I was like sir, u tryna leave the country right?
It’s just amazing to me that I really feel that I love him and want to help him but at the same time, I’ve said no to him maybe three or four times since 2020--not including deflecting certain advances. So maybe I wasn’t letting my emotional conscious deal with the fact that my rational conscious did not want him. Also, we hooked up a month or two ago and I was lying there thinking oh wait... I didn’t feel anything? Or maybe it felt like an end.
So ya! I think I was extrapolating romantic feelings that I had in the beginning of our relationship that had turned platonic. Also I very much know, and knew in 2020, that other than some sexy dramatics, he doesn’t offer me what I want. I think he wants me because he’s lonely. I also don’t really think that he knows what he wants and is chasing something. Meanwhile, I want a best friend and a partner. I also want some kids :).
I recently met someone kind of great, an ENFJ, who I think was written by a woman (I’ll post abt this fabulous man later maybe idk but this helps me think?), and we’ve been dating for the past month. I broke the news to INFJ, who took it a little hard, and who apparently thought something was going to happen even though he’s moving to East Asia (bruh). I’m very pleased for the progress in any case <3, I’m very happy where I am these days, and I hope INFJ finds what he’s looking for!
#this was only about infj because i hate having the story still like... open and unfinished on here#the will they won't they vibe is kinda overplayed#when the real question is should they#also i recognize that me moving to another city where I don't speak the language... and him moving at the same time nearby had me holdin on#because i had no other friends#when truly we needed either distance#or cognizant recognition that loneliness does not equate truly wanting someone#i'm very thankful to him for his friendship when i was lonely#in this season and when I moved to Germany alone during lockdown#he's helped me so so much over the years#at the same time though#i'd told him we shouldn't date when I moved to Germany and i was going through the same thought process:#we're not meant to be romantic partners#and i think this can get confused when you generally like someone and are attracted to them#but the act is made out of loneliness or worry of dying alone#i felt then and have felt recently that maybe he was my only chance but going for him always lowkey felt like settling#in terms of treatment (he isn't the very best in this regard#and this should be vERY important in choosing a partner)#also i now do not believe that there is only one person for someone and this is the thought that i really think was holding me back#i now believe we can love many and we can choose who loves us back the best#we can choose what we accept for ourselves and choose to look with an open heart for something more suiting or better#<3#personal
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
i really hate how hard it is to heal from the past
#trauma fucking sucks#i still keep thinking back to 2019 2020 bc that's when i got hit with back to back trauma#but it was half a decade ago#this is why i feel stuck#and i feel so pathetic because of it#and trying to shove my emotions to the side is the reason we're here processing this now so#and ya know what so fucked up?#i'm not even thinking about the things i should be#i'm not thinking about nearly dying or the man who did#i'm thinking about stupid fucking arguments#and my stupid ex like omg can you believe it lmao#i think my brain is trying to distract me a bit#i became masterful at diverting my attention away from whats actually upsetting me#so idk if my brain is just like 'hmm here think about this dumb thing your ex said that hurt your feelings'#instead of ya know#the actual triggers#but it's driving me insane bc i feel like i'm not progressing#like my brain is STILL not properly processing things#release me from this cycle#tbh EMDR is one of the only times i actually felt like i processed something and moved forward#maybe i should do EMDR tonight...#i'm too scared tho lol i'll have a meltdown all alone#anyway does anyone get a kick out of reading my insane rambles lol#urdtarah complains
0 notes
Text
Going to test drive a caaaar tomorrow 🚗🚗🚗
#personal#Our shitty truck is on its last legs and we've had to borrow my mil's car for the last week 🙃#Because it broke down in the middle of the road and had to be towed to the repair place#Where they kept it for 6 days before going ''we can't fix it take it away''#I think we're going to end up selling it#But either way we need another car stat so!#This will be my first car! ☺️#I hope this one is good bc I'd love to not have to go through hoops with the car-buying process#We're still in the midst of the house-buying process 😩#We should be closing in the next 2 weeks#So it's gone like this:#May - get married#June - get served 60 days to leave apt bc landlords got bought out by gentrifying flippers#July - endless house hunting + end up adopting a cat#August - offer on house is accepted + packing to move + car dies + buy new car + see if we'll be able to close before need to be out of apt#If not we'll have to either stay at a hotel or with my mom in the interim and have all our belongings in storage#Yippee wahoo etc right#Good grief I'm tired#What ISN'T happening right now
0 notes
Text
y'know. i don't often hate the way my brain is and how difficult it makes certain things for me.
i do a little today though.
#i'm probably going to feel this way the rest of the week#got some Stressful Stuff on my plate - none of it is world ending no matter what my brain thinks#but it's stressful and needs to get done#we already took care of One of the big major things just today because i was having a breakdown about it#because peeks threw up on my favorite shirt after having thrown up all over my bed yesterday and i'm like#she does this when there's a lot of change and stress going on and we've just moved and also we're attempting peace negotiations between he#and Solaire and it's. y'know. hampered by the fact that she's poorly socialized and both of them are dumb as rocks#and so she's stressed out because of the myriad of changes happening to her#and i'm stressed out because she's stressed out PLUS all the other bureaucratic nonsense i have in my brain#AND there's external stress in my foundkin (we're workshopping ways i can integrate the Family Label to apply to folks who weren't terrible#to me when i was a child) and it's just like#i had a really good day yesterday#i've been having pretty good days in general and i knew the crash would come and i knew that i'd get stressed about these things to the max#and that's. like. I know the science and paths behind how we got here#but i also hate that i'm here in this mindset with these things and i also cannot do the laundry myself after all#first because stairs are not always conquerable (they are Exceptionally Not For Me as of yesterday to the point where i'm going to have to#limit myself to the bathroom that doesn't have 2 stairs down to it even if it's closer in the moment)#and second because i ABHOR the texture of tide pods but i cannot deny that they are useful and so much easier to use/keep tidy#than a jug of Cleaning Goo is#so like. i'm embarrassed that all my bedding needs washing and i'm embarrassed that my shirt needs washing#and i'm embarrassed that i make dirty clothes in general and i *am* getting over that#it's slow but the fact that physically laundry is not a task i can complete on the wet side of things#(i still really enjoy the process of folding and sorting though i don't get around to it quickly)#but like. this is one of the reasons why i get freaked out about the fact that i create laundry that needs doing#even if it's not actually my fault (i'm trying very hard to remember it's not my fault the cat threw up on my clothes#and them being put away would have meant she probably would have thrown up on something else that needed to be cleaned#like the bed for example - i cannot put my whole bed away so she doesn't throw up on it)#becuase i feel like i'm burdening someone else to do a whole bunch of work for *me* and i can't do anything in return#(as if i haven't been very deliberately trying to keep up with the dishes daily this whole week so i don't feel like i contribute nothing t#the household)
1 note
·
View note
Text
True love is me chattering nonsense at my cat and she looks up at me with her big green eyes, not a single thought in her little head. Or perhaps too many thoughts for her to be able to process
#my poor kitten we are in the process of moving today and she's so stressed T^T#i wish i could explain to her with words that everything's okay and we're not abandoning her#have to lock her in a room to make sure she doesn't get stepped on or anything and she hates it so much :c#tho for now it's just me and her here so i have decided to free her. which has helped her calm down a lot#but she's still looking for the rest of our family :c
1 note
·
View note