#cuz listen. its pretty fucking bad right now
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the bittersweet but absolute flood of relief that comes from admitting defeat at living independently, to have to move back in with parents. we tried! we gave it our best shot for almost 3 years! but living like this (being on our own) is just not possible for us at this time of our lives. we've finally proved it to ourselves that we can't do it. it'll be okay to let ourselves rest now
#latimers parents not mine!!!! i am NOT moving back to florida LOL#really hope that the changes will be good for my mental health. this apartment is toxic to us#ive been on the verge of meltdowns Kind Of A Lot lately. imnot doing great#extremely dependent on substances. just to reach a baseline level of functioning. but even that isnt working as much anymore#the only things i do on my phone or tablet these days is like. 2 mobile games. and skirting past my dms to check latimers blog#its too overwhelming to even open discord these days yknow. everything on earth is too much for me right meow#i havent been drawing i havent been social online OR irl i havent been cooking or creating#i havent been keeping up with personal hygiene like at all im particularly ashamed about that one#i've been really bad about doing my T the past few months which is a HUGE shame because im SO fucking hyped to be on it#theres just. too many obstacles in getting it done half the time. and the other half of the time i just forget#anyway. anyway.#our lease ends in july so between now and then we're just gonna try our best to tolerate our living situation enough to get by#there's a light at the end of the tunnel. and its called 'i only have to be in charge of like 2 rooms at most. and not a household!'#we're gonna try to slowly comb through all our things between now and then so the process of moving wont suck as bad#cuz listen. its pretty fucking bad right now#maybe not for other people. but it is for me. and its okay to let myself come to terms with that#im just. so relieved. still very stressed! but theres at least light at the end of the tunnel and its only like 2 months away#ill be able to draw guilt-free again. ill be able to just EXIST guilt-free#i dont think ive felt guilt-free for just existing the way i do since like. turning 20#i know my mom wouldve loved if i stayed home forever. and im sad i cant be there for her#but ever since i had a fight with my dad at 15 or 16 it just really felt like he didnt want me there more and more#maybe as the youngest he was resenting that i was preventing him from becoming an empty nester or something. i dont know#because all the other kids had been moved out and on their own at least once but i had never left home before#i dont know if he'd be heartbroken or not to hear that i feeling like he was resenting me. but thats the energy i was picking up for years#i dunno. i dont know#anyway. back to housing. for now im going to try to relax and store energy for the moving process#the huge pile of things by the kitchen? i dont have to worry about that becoming permanent because we're leaving in 2 months#the general discord of the state of our possessions? we have to go through everything to pack it all anyway. we can move in RIGHT this time#when we moved in here we didnt have a car or license so we were dependent on latimers 3-hr-drive-away parents to help us move#just /across town/. and we had a whole month between leases! but it still had to be done in a weekend
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Head Empty. Thinking about high!plug!fontaine n high!reader. He’d def be the plug that flirts with her and gives her deals and one day he asks her to smoke wit him for free and they just start making out in his car listening to music. ����😱😱
gurl the new pfp frightened me a bit ngl 💀���
but coming right up! i took some creative liberties cuz i kinda forgot to double check what your ask said. im srry its just once i got that ball rolling, i couldn't stoppp ( ´,_ゝ`)
plug! fontaine x high! reader | (the nsfw is below the cutting off)
▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎♤▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎♤▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎♤▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎♤▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎♤▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎♤▪︎▪︎
♤ taine wasn't exactly your first choice for a plug. he was a well known dealer in the glen, but the things he was known for made you hesitant. he was a no nonsense type dealer, he gives a price, you pay on time. if you can't do as simple as that then you wasting his time. and knowing you were tight on money sometimes, you decided it best to stick to the plugs you knew.
♤ but twelve wack ass joints later, you found yourself sitting in a certain green cadillac that you never thought you'd set foot in. both of you sat in silence for a few seconds, only a few feet away from each other.
♤ you patiently watched as he tried to light his spliff with the faulty lighter. growing more frustrated, he soon tossed the lighter onto the dash, then turned to you expectantly. and as if you could read his mind, you pulled your lighter and held it up for him to take.
♤ he stared at you for a bit, you felt as if you body was on fire. he had a pair of the scariest eyes you've ever seen. and he kept those eyes on you the entire time. not once looking away.
♤ you felt him wrap around your wrists. he pulled your hands closer to his face. your entire body became solid rock. all you could hear was your heart beating in your ears. the grip on your wrists were slack, giving you enough leeway to pull back if you wanted to. but something about the way he looked at you, made you stay still for him.
♤ he motioned for you to light the joint. you obliged. the orange glow of the flame made his eyes even more sinister. god he's terrifying. hot but, terrifyingly hot. once it was lit, he leaned back and let your wrist fall from his grasp. he took two puffs before he passed it over. " 'ere. take it. ' tell me if 'sgood enough."
♤ your breath was shaky as you inhaled the smoke. it was strong, definitely would get you fucked up in less than a minute. you handed it back to him. "you barely took tha' shi'. come 'ere."
♤ he placed the blunt back between his lips, as he settles one of his hands behind your head. "was he gonna gimme a shotgun right now. he's not....is he?" you let your brain rambled for bit till a low "open" brought you back.
♤ taine never does this, especially with cilents. but he took an interest in you. you seemed nervous, unlike most of his clients that just want their quick fix. and it helps that you weren't bad looking either. kinda cute in fact.
♤ but that didn't mean he wasn't fed up from watching your pretty little lips not taking his blunt properly. that shit ain't cheap. but you took the shot gun gave you pretty well. he saw how the smoke made your eyes a little teary, so he wiped a couple away before he let you go.
♤ you stared at him for a bit. he found you amusing that's for sure. and while he was trying to subside a smirk, you were trying to calm the ache between your legs. god you needed to get out this car before you did something you regret. but would you regret it? from the way his pants seemed to be stiffening, he probably felt the same way.
♤ reaching into his jacket he pulled a small plastic baggy,,that looked to contain at least 5 grams. your eyes went wide. this was way more than the agreed amount, that's at least $45 bucks, you didn't have that much on you. shit shit shit.
♤ "easy ma, this one's on the house" and with that you became one of his regulars. and his favorite at that.
♤ of course you became his favorite. i mean he'd never let a customer come over his house. much less one sit on his couch, smoke his blunt and watch a show on his tv.
♤ he certainly wouldn't let a customer stretch their legs across his lap either. or let one inch closer to him than appropriate, to the point where they made it onto his lap. he didnt mind, it definitely did help him relieve the ache between his legs. and he wasn't opposed to the way you let him kiss alongside your jaw, and even suck a couple marks into your skin.
♤ no regular of his ever let him pull down their shorts and toss them to god knows where. he's never gotten on his knees and licked a fat stripe along over their panties. never has he had to pull said panties to the side just so he could finally get a good look at how at your cunt.
♤ you were the only one who's clit he's mouthed at till his jaw ached. he didn't stop till he had to wrap his hands around your hips to hold you still.
♤ never once as taine let a regular, eagerly lick his precum from the slit to the point where he'd lull his head back everytime he felt their tongue dip into his slit. or had one force his cock into their mouth till the tip hit the back of their throat. and they stayed deepthroating him till he finally released. or had one lick up every last drop of cum that could find. no matter if it some was on his stomach, chest, thigh or on their face. he's never given a regular a couple puffs of his joint as a reward for sucking him to completion.
♤ he wondered if his weed made you like this. was it so good that it made you do your best to take him to the hilt, even though you could barely take a proper breath. probably it was the reason he'd take a minute or two cause the way your walls squeezed him, he swore he was gonna cum inside you right then and there.
♤ was his shit so good that it made you cry out his name and claw at his back with every thrust. had him having to slap your tits whenever you looked too far gone. make him tell you to how good you were, or that from the way your walls started to push him out, you were close. make him coo at you whenever you finally came, so you knew how proud he was. maybe it was why you bared the overwhelming sensation that your release brought so he could reach his edge. maybe that what made you mumbled about him cumming inside you.
♤ tempting but he preferred to release on your cunt so you could reach your hand down and desperately collect his droplets into your mouth. god he loved when you did that. he especially when you parted your slit so he could get one last lick before he let you suck it off his tongue.
♤ never had he had a regular make him feel that good to the point he gave them free weed.
#fontaine x reader#they cloned tyrone#fontaine they cloned tyrone#fontaine x black reader#☆° via writes °☆#fontaine smut
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STRANGER THINGS SEXUALITY HEADCANONS BECAUSE ITS MY GOOD RIGHT 🗣️🗣️🗣️ + YAPPING!
I am so tired rn. I'm having a German exam on Friday and my ass is sitting here writing down shit for yall because WDYM I ACTUALLY HAVE PPL READING MY SHIT? TYSM FOR THAT BTW 🫶🫶🫶 THIS WILL ALSO BE A SHIT TON OF YAPPING BTW!
~~☆
Mike: Okay, so I guess atp we all know that this guy is just a closeted Homosexual. He tries so hard to hide the fact he's gay, he's failing miserably. And he is VERY confused by his feelings thorwards Will.
Will: Openly gay. I don't have to say anything else. We all know he is yearning for Mike. We all know he always had been.
Lucas: Bi. As a preteen he was kind of simping for a random basketball player. Later in life he realized that might've been a little more than just that.
Dustin: Straight Ally to bi-curious. He is pretty sure he is into girls but he prolly wouldn't say no to trying. ALSO CAN WE PLS APPRECIATE HIS AND SUZIES RELATIONSHIP? Bros live SO FAR away and try EVERYTHING to communicate with each other.
Eleven: I am actually SO TORN. I am 100% she is Asexual. Kissing, cuddling, holding hands, being cheesy is a 100% yes for her. But anything more is gross. Also I am a Lesbian El truther. Cuz Lesbian and Gay pairings are ALWAYS fun (Syd and Stan IANOWT). But also just because I personally think that she was just so incredibly attached to Mike, she didn't even rlly knew what love even means. Mike was the first boy her age she got to know. Ofc she had to be with him. Now the hard part. I am unsure wether Aromantic or Demiromantic El. I do belive in independent partnered El. BUT ELMAX. God they got me going FERAL. Either way she's on the spectrum!
Max: 100% Bi too. I love Lumax and Elmax, both is PERFECT. Max never thought about her sexuality much. She fell for Lucas, realized girls where cute too and just vibed with it. She and Robin probably had a talk about that when Robin outs herself. And they are very casual about it!
Suzie: Straight Ally! The sweetest and kindest soul. She will listen to everyone's pains and relationship struggles, sit there akwardly and then yap to cheer them up. She is probably bad with comforting. (Actually I just realized as I'm writing this that Autism makes sense for her! And now I'm HAPPY about that.)
Nancy: Bi panic in person. Her relationship with Steve was merely to fuck around (haha literally.) and be rebellious. Her relationship with Jonathan wad more and really serious. But you are on my blog and therefore you KNOW what I'm gonna scream for. RONANCE. After sorting things out with Jonathan, they both decided to part. She was akward around Steve but only because she started falling for his bestie. And god she loves Robin sm. She was so afraid of getting attached but SUPRISE SUPRISE. She did.
Jonathan: Straight Ally(???) I actually never thought much about him even tho from season 1-3 he was one of my ultimate favs. He just decided to be single for some time after Nancy and him broke up and he's happy about it. He goes back to California (after thinking about it for a long time because he wanted to be there for Will. But after Byler sorted it out he could leave peacefully.) Anyways, he and Argyle just keep vibin, he gets a photography job and maybe eventually after a break another girl.
Argyle: Pan. Oh GOD I LOVE HIM. I just know he and Jonathan did things when they were high. (Jonathan actually told Nancy and apologized like 500 times but she didn't mind a lot). He hooks up with random at times. Not in a bad way. He is a mindful person and makes sure everything is safe and protected. He has a few girlfriends from time to time. Some boyfriends here and there. Just happy to be there! He just wants someone who doesn't care about him being a stoner.
Steve: Bi panic in person #2. This man was convinced he was straight until he met Robin. She talked to much about herself that Steve probably realized at some point that guys are actually kind of hot. And some of his 'idols' where maybe small crushes. I am not OBSESSED with Steddie. But I don't hate them. I don't really care about them. But Steve will be happy, doesn't matter if a girl or guy!
Robin: Canon Lesbian. God I love the way she found out in rebel Robin. And over the time, when she grows closer with all of the party she eventually gets less closed up and pretty loose with the topic of her being a Lesbian. The second person she outed herself to was Nancy (under tears and sobs because she's so in love with her.) And then strangely enough Mike because she noticed the akward pining for Will and decided to talk some sense into him. Her first real crush and gay awakening was Tammy, which is canon. She liked Vicky in a way. It was a complicated in between after she met Nancy. But since she was with Jonathan, she tried to get rid off her thoughts with focusing on Vicky, But as the upside down got worse and she spend much more time with Nancy she was convinced she wanted her more. And luckily these feelings where mutual. Also rip Robin, you would love Chapell Roan and Billie Eillish.
Eddie: I think we all are convinced that he is gay. He cared about Chrissy but didn't know her close enough. He always liked boys and was okay with it. He immediately knew what Robin is and was honestly just vibing. He had a girlfriend (which made him realize he likes boys) and a secret boyfriend before. And once the party is so comfortable and Robin outed herself to all of them he followed to make her feel less akward which leads into everyone outing themselves. Because fruity people attract fruity people.
Vicky: I honestly don't know enough about her atp. I think she's Bi. Or maybe a little confused about all this esp when she met Robin? I like Rovicky. Not more than Ronance, but it's cute and I honestly only want Robin to be happy ):
Joyce: Straight Ally but like the biggest in history. She kissed Karen before (cuz I say so.) She always knew that Will was gay because of the way he interacted with Mike. She is so gentle and careful about it. Educating herself, asking questions if confortable. She just wants to protect. That's why she is also do incredibly nice to Robin, because she knew her parents won't give her unconditional love so someone has to.
Hopper: Straight Ally but very confused about everything. He doesn't get the whole lgbtq thing. But as soon as Will officially outed himself, Hopper made such an effort into educating himself to not say anything wrong. And when El outed herself he spit out a very smart sounding scientific definition and El giggled.
Murray: Gayest character in this show. Bro is like gayer than Will atp. He wanted Alexei. He loved him and sobbed for months straight. Thats it. A miserable sad gay man.
Special Guest: KAREN!!: I am very deep in this fandom since August 2023. ADHD does fun things and made me read too many things. And from all these times on Ao3, Tumblr, Pinterest or the part in Rebel Robin where Robin realized that everyone is just trying to fit into society and be perfect in a way, I've been growing VERY fond of the closeted Lesbian Karen headcanons. She liked girls so much, she know she did. And she decided to not embrace it or even try to. She just adapted into that sad tradwife life and decided to make everyone satisfied. She was very happy when Nancy brought home Robin and Mike brought Will. She is so proud of her children expressing themselves unlike her. Also how tf did she pick Ted? The laziest, stupidest and most gross mf ever???
So uhhh- Robin is projecting... If you have anything you want to see from me. If you want moodboards, drabbles, OS, headcanons or whatever, PLEASE REQUEST THEM. I'm so desperate. I do all Finn Wolfhard and Maya Hawke fandoms cuz that's my thing >:)
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#stranger things#ronance#robin buckley#nancy wheeler#lesbian#will Byers#mike wheeler#eleven hopper#eleven jane hopper#max mayfield#lucas sinclair#dustin henderson#suzie stranger things#jonathan byers#steve harrington#argyle#joyce byers#jim hopper#el hopper#Murray#Karen wheeler#Byler#Jopper#Lumax#Elmax#Jancy#Murray x Alexei#Robin x Nancy#gay#I love gay ppl
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FLORA please . . . thinking abt dazai n fedya locked up together makes mi think of a threesome w them 🤭 how rough do u think they would be :O r they fighting over who gets to fuck ur pretty cunny ! ! giv mi all da deets teheheh :3
coco!! hmmmm ok i've been thinking a lot abt this hehehe sorry for how long it got 🤭
okey this could go so many different ways i could write an actual dissertation but. im going to come at this as if u are fyodor's lover hehehe
so. fedya is typically very gentle and sweet with his lover, esp in bed (unless you ask for otherwise) but... he hates dazai, and would rather die than let him have anything of his, especially u. so if u somehow stumbled into a threesome with them, it would be a lot djfjsjdj the way i see it happening is dazai purposely pushing all of fyodor's buttons abt how beautiful and sexy you are and how bad he wants you, probably taunts fyodor and says that he doesn't satisfy you ,,, and usually fedya can ignore dazai easily but when it comes to u and saying some shit like that he absolutely loses his SHIT and is like you're gonna watch and see how good i fuck her, how she falls apart over my cock
and he's very right!!! u do you def do. plus you've always thought dazai was kinda sexy so u agree to go along with their stupid game
so it starts out as just u and fedya while dazai watches, likely starting out w just missionary/ nearly mating press. he immediately jumps to what he knows makes you whine and moan the most, like fucking u right at the angle he knows feels the best, not too slow but not too fast, hips meeting flush with yours as he massages your clit and presses sweet kisses all over your face and lips. bc to him, this isn't just abt showing dazai how good the sex is, anyone can make sex feel good, he wants to rub it in his face too how much u just fucking love him and want him to be inside u not just cuz of how heavenly it feels, but bc u need to be that close to him. dazai fists his angry red cock, massaging himself to the sounds of your whimpers and cries and just how hot u look getting fucked.
when fyodor spills his cum inside you is when he decides its ok for dazai to take u next, smirking bc now he has to deal with the fact that he'll be fucking fyodor's cum right into you. u cant lie tho, dazai is really fucking talented. he's taking you from the back, ass high in the air as he shoves his desperate, needy, neglected cock so deep inside you it kisses your cervix and makes ur eyes roll back in your head. dazai is kinda losing it himself, absolutely mesmerized by the way ur cunt stretches and pulls with each thrust of his cock, the cream that's dripping down ur thighs and gathering onto his length. fyodor's the one watching now, irked that dazai's making you moan but is confident enough to know he could never be as good. he can't stay away for too long tho, sidles up next to u as dazai continues to fuck u as he sticks his hand in between ur thighs to rub your clit and suck on your nipples, and to say you were overstimulated was an understatement. your senses were so overloaded and on fire as they both had their way with you, but goddamn did it feel fucking amazing. it was the best orgasm you had had in a long time.
one of the hard and fast rules fyodor set was that dazai was by NO means allowed to cum inside u, and if he did it would result in very unsightly consequences. dazai doesn't rly listen to rules but he knew fyodor did not fuck around when it came to u. so he settles for flipping you over so he can cum all over ur tummy, using his fingertips to spread the seed all over you and squeeze your breasts. fyodor slaps his hands away. ur incredibly out of breath and fucked out at this point, a tiny bit of drool pooling at the edge of your mouth as you tried to catch ur breath, but things weren't over yet.
dazai wanted to know what ur mouth felt like, and weirdly, fyodor was ok with that. let him experience how good you suck dick and have to live knowing that fyodor is the only one who'll ever get to experience that. sat on fyodor's lap with your back to his chest now, his cock buried deep inside you as a reminder of who u rly belong to, dazai is sat on his knees next to you so you can suck him off. now he's the one whimpering and moaning as you take him into your mouth and skillfully use your lips and tongue to give him the best head of his life, and fyodor only smirks as he watches and feels u very slowly rising and falling on his own cock, subconsciously chasing the familiar feeling. and with a good massage of dazai's balls, he's cumming down your throat with a hearty groan -- he almost immediately gets hard again when he watches u swallow every single drop easily, licking ur lips afterwards with a smile.
in the end, fedya is right. dazai would forever be jealous that fyodor is the only one who ever got to have you. and that's how i think a threesome would go :)
#sorry it took me so long to get to this :(#also i didnt kno if u meant actually taking place in prison so i didnt do that fkdjjfdfj#hope u like :)#voices in my head#lover: coco 🎀#dazai x reader#fyodor x reader#bsd x reader
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Do you ever love a character so much you sorta steal your entire personality from them,,
<autism rant>
Cuz like I'm obsessed with Nicole from class of '09, if sorta stolen my whole humor from her, Which isn't really a good thing because shes kinda a piece of shit, the game revolves around her being a horrible person or trying to kill herself or something like that, I'm not like as mentally ill as her, but my humor has evolved to be similar to Nicole and ive sorta had this not care attitude. I've also been really jokingly mean to one of my best friends (he knows its a joke, thats our humor) but I accidentally did that to my little brother and felt SO bad lmao,, (he said something very obviously and I loudly go "yeah no fucking shit bitch" then started apologizing profusely) This other time I was playing blooket w/ that same friend and I did something that made him eat a fake burger and I went really loud "have this fucking burger you fat ass bitch" and hje just stared at me like wtf,, and the other person on the call (who I just met) was SHOCKED.
i'm not a bad person,, hes okay with me making those jokes btw
well im sorta a bad person but i'm working on that
i sorta hate having obsessions over character because i want to BE THEM. and it sucks even more when theyre a horrible person--and when theyre a girl,, cuz like i want to de-transition and become a terrible person and chane my name to Nicole WHAT THE FUCK WHY I DONT KNOW and like i had an alt acc on tiktok where i used she/her and named myself nicole and it was like a class of 09 fanpage sorta. and like i dont wanna be a bad person nor do i wanna hurt people feelings or be addicted to drugs AT ALL but like NICOLE🙏🙏🙏
this always happens when i have some sort of obsession. i dont typically have favorites but when i do its like an obsession
and like one other problem with being obsessed with nicole is i accidentally obsess over mental illness and (stuff i shouldnt obsess over), wich is really bad and unhealthy.
I gain little obsessions over certain things, like right now im REALLY obsessed with a game called "bad parenting" and it's a really really sad game. I wont spoil it but its genuinelly depressing and made me cry. after i saw it i wanted to hug my dad and tell him i loved him for being a good dad. ive been listening to the backround song on repeat for a bit, i might even draw fanart of it idk,, but i feel like i shouldnt be hyper obsessed with it
as a kid i also was really obsessed with "salad fingers" wich had a sadish theme to it, i kinda forget the plot but i thought it was interesting and how the main charecter was kinda messed up.
I also really like "little miss fortune" wich was also really sad. again i dont remember the plot my childhood is sorta a blur and i dont remember it well
"Sally face" is another sad game i liked. not gonna spoilt it but i loved the supernatural bit and there was a lot of death.
I also really love horror movies, ESPECIALLY horror movies that go into psychology. Like for example, saw is pretty interesting because its cool to see if people would rather cut of an arm or die. I know it's fake but it's still really cool.
Theres a lot i find interesting but i dont wanna sound like im actually insane lol
This ran went in so many placed i forgot what the original post was about😭 took me abt 2 and 1/2 class period to wright
If you read this all, thanks! If you relate reblog or comment (or make a new post and tag me) and tell me what charecter you relate to/obsess over
#midwest emo teen#midwest emo kid#midwest emo music#midwestern emo#midwest emo#midwest#emo kid#emo#nicole class of 09#jecka class of 09#class of 09#class of '09#i'm litterly nicole from class of 09 i dont care what anybody says I AM HER#mental illness#horror#bad parenting#saw franchise#salad fingers#sally face#little miss fortune
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so my day literally just started, like im on my way to uni for my classes rn (which btw kinda sucking rn cuz its literally -40°C out), but i have so much jason brain rot i need to share
- jay absolutely would get a kick out of flirting like hell but would also immediately go redder than his helmet if it got turned around on him (he'd be so cute, i love flustering men lmao)
- i am in love with your idea of him just utterly messing around with constantine's sidekick!reader like yes, peak comedy right there, but also i think he'd be so so just heart eyes, fully entranced watching them do their magic especially for the first time
- i keep having this image of messy haired jason just curled up in bed, reading his favourite book and it's golden hour and he's wearing glasses (for actual sight purpose or for aesthetic only idk) but the sunset's making him all glowy and majestic and ugh i wanna play with his hair so bad
anyway that's it from me for now lol
-🦊
i kinda miss going to uni MMMM but anyways how tf are they making you go with that weather????? i would def throw myself on fire, in my country 24° C is already a bit cold....... (we do live in hell, yeah)
now thanks for sharing now i feel the urge to kiss your brain, please
i can totally see jay being all shy when he is indeed flirting with you because he does likes you so as soon as you call him "pretty boy" for the first time he's about to explode !!!! does he even needs the red helmet to be called red hood???
AND FUCK YES, HE WOULD BE SO STUNNED AND UHHHH i can totally picture jay sitting there listening to every story you have, to every adventure you've lived with constantine and he's so into listening to you he smiles widely because you sound so passionate about it i want to cry i need him so bad to be my bf and i– 😭
okay........ okay i can can i mmmmmm i can get why, just him being all cozy and calm, reading because he's so into the book almost as if nothing else around him existed besides you, he enjoys reading while your fingers brush his hair and your nails scratch his scalp, he can even feel himself getting sleepy but the book is just so good and your company makes it even better
dear 🦊 anon, please keep the jason brain rot strong, do this for all of us make the world a great place (plus have a good day, hun)
#luv letters!#i need jason to be real so bad uhhhhhh#jason todd brain rot#jason todd imagine#jason todd blurb#jason todd x reader
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tag game! 🎧🎶 tagged by @theocannibalism shuffle your music library and share the first 10 songs that come up.
Thanks bud! Shuffling my liked instead of my playlists for fairness ✌️
Waiting For The Weekend by San Cisco: a decent song! I liked it more in uni but it's certainly still musically pretty - it's a little trite to write a love song about drugs being personified, but San Cisco can make anything a sexy indie jam (7/10) Favourite line: And when she's standing right next to me / She's never quite as close as I'd like her to be
Your Dog by Soccer Mommy: a STELLAR song by a band truly so close to my heart - my fav combination in music is a clean voice and dirty bass. also this song also has a fucked up relationship dynamic and its. very Izzy Hands to me sorry (10/10) Favourite line: Forehead kisses break my knees / And leave me crawling back to you
Pulaski at Night by Andrew Bird: another top tier banger but also (shout out to artificial ghost radio listeners) this is my NBC hannigram song its so. like the classical instruments and delusional sweetness makes it feel like a candlelit waltz in a blood splattered suit (10/10) Favourite line: I write you a story / But it loses its thread / And all of my witnesses / Keep turning up, turning up dead
Paint It, Black by The Rolling Stones: truly wild that this is in my likes because its a great song but its like. I don't think I've ever intentionally listened to the rolling stones apart from this? anyway bangers only I always love how dramatic and goth it is (8/10) Favourite line: No more will my green sea / Go turn a deeper blue
Androgynous by The Replacements: this song honestly makes me tear up sometimes, even tho its purely joyful, because it makes me think about how its a song from the 80s that has more kindness and love for genderqueer people than most people do 40 years later. It makes me love being t4t (9/10) Favourite line: Now, something meets boy, and something meets girl / They both look the same / They're overjoyed in this world
Cinnamon Spider by Jack Off Jill: nothing wrong with an alt/goth song about revenge and guilt with weird voice modulated screaming and creepy whispering (7/10) Favourite line: Consumed by hate and guilt, she'll never retire / Too old to fix, too dead to ever acquire
Human Fly by The Cramps: I've been listening to a lot of rockabilly/oldhead goth rock recently and I'm loving the cramps! I've only really heard the big hits until recently, but Human Fly is definitely my stand-out favourite, I love songs that are kinda nasty and maggoty or more conceptual or goofy! It makes it stand out to me (10/10) Favourite line: And baby I won't care / 'Cuz baby I don't scare / 'Cuz I'm a reborn maggot using germ warfare
The Price Is Right Theme Song by Antarctigo Vespucci: I'm a little over listening to indie emo at the moment so I do frequently skip this when it comes on shuffle, but the lyricism is honestly heartbreaking (5/10) Favourite line: Oh my lord, I wish that I didn't know they'll still make TV shows long after I go.
Big Bird by AJJ: I have thoughts feelings comments and critiques of AJJ, but I can't deny that if you want to be in a dangerously bad mood it hits. it completely hits. and I think its interesting that they make songs about taboo intrusive thoughts and criticisms they have of the world, even if i dont always love the song they make in the end (6/10) Favourite line: So I bought a knife / I am a knife / I am a Knife Man
Arty Boy by Flight Facilities ft. Emma Louise: a real vibey party song about being inexplicably into the guy taking photos and smoking at the function instead of dancing - to me it reads as a little comphet, or a little bit bisexual, because the way Emma Louise is singing about the ladies is a lil sus (7/10) Favourite line: And all the girls must be models here, sipping up on margaritas / Twist their bodies so beautiful, making shapes with the music
idk who to tag but if you want an excuse to do this, go with my blessing and pretend I tagged you
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Someone said headcanons? (Most of these are John cuz I'm literally him in the same way you're Marquis) I guess some of these are not really queer specific but it's the John Wick universe so everything is queer by proxy. - In my hc John is bi but I mean any interpretation that is not straight is correct in my mind. All the sexualities exist in him simultaneously. He's everything. - Helen is also bi btw so these two are this type of couple that appears straight at first and then you learn Helen had a girlfriend of five years and John used to go to bars to suck di- - I'm pretty sure people have said it already or at least partially, but I'll repeat because JOHN IS A SWITCH. He also gives of service-top so yeah do with that whatever. - They would tell each other their past experiences and fuck afterwards. I don't know does it count as swinging if it's memories?? - I can see John being into choking, on both sides. Something about working with your life constantly on the line and then having enough trust to let someone have control over your literal source of life is...kinda hot. - John still has a leather jacket full of old queer pins somewhere in his closet. By old I mean something you'll see when you type "vintage queer pins" into google yes he probably has those. - John is good at pick-pocketing, he just doesn't do it much anymore. Although he would sometimes steal a friend's wallet and give it right back to be cocky. - He probably listens to Soviet punk rock like "Grazhdanskaya Oborona" and "Kino". - A bit of a reach buuuut. Marquis tried fencing to hit on someone he liked. - And she fucking FAILED because of course. - So now he's not only alone but is not good at fencing either. Failed at both. - Also I imagine Caine had some sort of existential crisis, because for most seeing people loosing sight is terrifying. So he would touch John's face as a way to calm himself because he can't look at him anymore. - He stopped with the face touching but he will still grab or at least try to touch someone next to him when stressed - That probably also applies to sex somehow. This bitch will grab you and REFUSE TO LET GO. - Also power-bottom vibes, do with that whatever.
Okay I should stop or I'll break the website bye bye
John is good at pick-pocketing, he just doesn't do it much anymore. Although he would sometimes steal a friend's wallet and give it right back to be cocky.
Bro changed for the better i fear😭😭 imagine being john’s friend when he was younger you reach into your pocket and the wallet is NOT there whatsoever. this man is a menace even when he was YOUNGER he just grew more refined and professional
John still has a leather jacket full of old queer pins somewhere in his closet. By old I mean something you'll see when you type "vintage queer pins" into google yes he probably has those.
brother needs to drop where he got these because damn i need this in my life like actually
A bit of a reach buuuut. Marquis tried fencing to hit on someone he liked. And she fucking FAILED because of course. So now he's not only alone but is not good at fencing either. Failed at both.
STOPPPP😭😭😭😭 her villain origin story fr😭 how are you gonna be a FRENCH NOBLE and be bad at both RIZZ and FENCING⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️ this is insane pls get him a wingman
He stopped with the face touching but he will still grab or at least try to touch someone next to him when stressed. That probably also applies to sex somehow. This bitch will grab you and REFUSE TO LET GO.
Its CAINE so i would let him hold onto me and idk like grab my arm because my oh my papi😍
#john wick#caine (john wick)#caine jw#marquis de gramont#marquis vincent de gramont#vincent de gramont#he/she marquis de gramont#wickblr headcanons
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yesss omg gl with android!minhee i’m looking forward to that!!!! take ur time of course!!
so.. i teased biker!hee.. subby! biker! hee or i’m thinking like street racer hee .. the point!!! is just that either he’s a racer of some kind but then he melts in the palm of his partner’s hand when he gets home, needing to be taken care of<333 or.. that’s fun, but im also thinking of like.. rival street racers heeseung and y/n, and blah blah, lots of badmouthing and poor sportsmanship that turns into hate sex <333 cuz i just desperately!! need to humiliate and degrade him because he’s too much all the time, he thinks he’s all that and he needs to be put in his place fr.
so like, i’m thinking post race while the adrenaline is still buzzing in both of you, heeseung shoves u a little or something and he’s getting angry cuz you cut him off around the last corner (idfk anything about racing ok but listen!!!) and ur like no fucking way, that was just you being really bad at what you’re trying to make a living off of :) and idk i don’t rly feel like writing anything happening in an alleyway so maybe like idk work with me here, he’s at ur apartment. somehow. and just. i’m not being creative rn ok but imagine with me, ur now straddling him on the couch and swiping your thumb over his bottom lip, “how about you use that pretty mouth in a way that’s more fun for both of us? hmm?” and of course he would squirm a little, parting his lips to protest but u don’t push your finger inside.. you don’t need to, because you grind your hips a little against him, running your hands over his firm chest and he’s sucking your thumb into his mouth on his own, moaning around it <33333 and again there’s too much detail to think about but just, i think i literally said all of this last time i talked about sub!hee but riding him, with his back flat against the mattress, i wanna degrade him so bad so just all the dirty talk would be, “look how pathetic you look like this, so cute”, or “if only your other opponents could see you now, nobody could be intimidated by you if they saw you like this,” and caressing his cheek, and pressing your palm against his throat 😵💫 also like you said last time 1000% spitting in his mouth, “open up, slut” and then spitting into his mouth, pushing his jaw shut, and commanding that he swallow, “you’d do anything i’d tell you to, isn’t that right?”
idk how it got there but yeah. that’s what i was thinking.
- 🧁 anon
aaaaaaaaaaa all of this is so .. :( /pos
putting hee in his place is not a want its a need‼‼ especially when he acts like hes so much better than everyone else , better than you ,, even if u both know at the end of the day behind closed doors he'll always do whatever u ask of him without a second thought :3
(srry i dont rlly have much to add to this rn :')) but i swearrr what u wrote is so so so good omg)
#🍰 seongminiz !#🥞 enha !#enhypen hard hours#heeseung hard hours#enhypen hard thoughts#heeseung hard thoughts
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HIIII BAEKSSSSS I missed you 😔 how are you? Wsp? How's everything?
Man, I've been pretty peaceful I'd say..kinda idk. Maybe the calm before the storm but that's besides the point. I miss your work so so so much 🥹🥹🥹 like rlly, not wanting to pressurise you just GIRL RLLY MADE 2022 SUCH A GOOD EXPERIENCE.
Anyways I've been watching a ton of stuff ofc, found a new pakistani drama 😈😈 well it's kind of the same plot as u wld guess, but I like this one it's like if not a lot then a bit diff frm the same ass dynamic. It's like a first daughter x youngest son the fun part is it was supposed to be, first daughter x first son but he was a jerk and a red flag. So yes...it'd be fun, it's a silly dynamic imo ik for sure there are going to be a ton banters.
ALSO dude these asmr Rps be getting Outta hand 😭 Nah cz i cried. I CRIED. THE ANGST OHHHHH. Some asmr artists are just so fucking good like alanakamakwk i felt like I was in a movie.
Lemme tell u a bit abt it, so the concept was basically, an old bsf comes back into the listener's life not in a bad way or anything just cz the bsf lived farrrrr away.
"do you wanna see the new tattoo i got?"
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LIKE OKAY and then we did trace them too and a while later the convo goes deep "i got this tattoo bcz u told me seven years ago, what you don't rmr?" And then he sort of reminisces over the old times
"and that day..I went home, and texted you how much I liked you. And wanted to hang out with you a bunch.."
"that didn't happen I never texted you."
BRO OMG OMG ONWKWJWKW IM TELLING YOU THE FREAKIN TENSION BW ME AND MY HEADPHONES.
And then the best part was the listeners bf calls who also used to be friends with the bsf, and goes "i love you."
In hopes of hearing it frm us too. "Dear...?" Silence.
NO CUZ IMAGINE STANDING IN FRONT OF SOMEONE U ACTUALLY LOVE AND U GOTTA SAY ILY TO YOUR BF WHAT??? OMG.
And then when he comes out to go run errands he talks to the bsf AKA THE ASMR ARTIST I TELL U HIS VOICE *melts*
"we'll see you right?"
"... farewell"
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That's the visual representation of me I'm not even kidding. And....he just leaves. LIKE THAT?? WHAT ABOUT US AHHHH *dies*
Nah but yes, I've been obsessed now. At least it makes me feel something 😮💨
Ok also no way my old Bollywood obsession is dying anytime soon *listens to bol na halke halke*
Anyways bye bye baeks MAKE SURE TO TELL ME ABT YOURSELF HOW U DOING AND STUFF OK?? OK MWAH ILY 🤭
YOU SENT THIS LAST WEEK AND I JUST KIND OF LOGGED INFBWNDBSK SO SORRY
i hope you’re doing well!! i’m currently sick bc of a heatwave i caught at a wedding 🥰🥰
i’m glad you’re feeling peaceful! AND DHSKDHKW DONT MENTION IT FNDMSKC ITS BEEN 2 YEARS 😭😭😭 maybe my writing bug just dimmed LMFAOOOO haven’t been on here or read anything, ive been in my drafts just giggling and reading but never like posting or writing fbdndb but ive kind of, maybe wanting to write something for fall time which i’m not sure ill post but it’s got me smiling a bit!
WHAT IS THE SHOW TELL ME 🔫
omg i can never get behind asmr, i have this thing called misophonia, i just despise the way the arm sounds make my ears feel fmandksb i just feel triggered BUT U CRIED BC OF IT WHY 😭😭
u gotta send me the link of it bc the voice actor u say… 👁
does our bollywood obsession rly die 😭😭 the new tauba tauba got me going a bit crazy,,, heard the jannat bgm but sad version and iM OBSESSED WITH IT, it lowkey inspired me to think and write <3 got me giggling and imaging stuff <3 in my pillow fbwndbsj
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TRIPLY WHAMMY: The Monstrous, 🕸, and then I couldn't decide on the cat one so Tabby AND White Cat :3c
I guess that makes this a QUADRUPLE WHAMMY but that rolls off the tongue less good
math was never our strong side lets just say its cuz its from three different games. thanks for the ask babes xoxo The Monstrous this one is funny to me because as far as i know canonically frank gets to be at least two supernatural creatures. collecting that shit like he does other men's wives. anyway im not gonna be creative here and ill just say werewolf. big hairy often commits murder in a messy way and ends up covered in blood. but also there are so many long texts about how misunderstood the werewolf is as a figure. so like it fits in my mind. maybe if i got a long list of all mythical creatures and spent an hour reading it id come up with something more creative but this works too no?
🕸️
(song that reminds you of your ship) LIKE THREE actually none of them very extraordinary brave choices but im gonna go for the funniest one out of them black and white by kombi. the polish one. yeah. because okay listen. one thats just his color palette. haha. the song itself is about seeing the world in only those colors which is also very him. "life has no middle ground // love rule and divide" like okay do you hear me. please. i love assigning polish songs to fictional characters.
Tabby (are they snuggly?) right so i think meta menardi gets very cuddly and affectionate with frank because shes overwhelmed a little......... by what she feels. and now this is where it gets tricky for me because like. its not that he doesnt like it. its not that he exactly likes it either. its weird. its unusual. it takes up so much of his time for no reason and hes always got better things to do than this. but also once shes hugging him he doesnt really want to leave because as much as he dislikes it and he hates how soft she always is with him, its so... nice. so uh i guess point being meta is snuggly as hell, maybe less so when sleeping, frank isnt for the most part at least not actively but as time goes on both his enjoyment of and how bad he feels about the affection grow. ARGH i have a lot of thoughts about this specifically but i cant put them into words ever. their whole thing is just a bit complicated but in an entirely different way than frank is used to by that point. plus the more he genuinely likes her in any way the less he wants to stay because yeah sure she has some powers but she is NOT used to the level of danger he brings (the place she's a spider-person for is relatively chill) and hes reminded of that every time she holds him in any way. he likes having his arms around her in some way (standing behind her, keeping her by his side etc) and her favorite is cradling his head to her chest. like a baby. he doesnt like when she puts it like that.
White Cat (are the f/os eyes striking?) i said it once under some post but like hes got that fucking. blue-eyed people stare. so in that way yes. but also since its frank the look in his eyes is almost always a little unsettling. because of the uh you know. the war trauma and the murder trauma and the violent tendencies overall. but meta likes them, she likes the little changes in them depending on what hes thinking. subtle but there and shes always soo proud of herself to catch them. also to me (and by extension to her ahaha) hes just. in some strange way. real pretty. in turn frank doesnt think metas eyes are "striking" exactly but he does thing they fit her a lot. theyre round, warm, and with a look of naivety. like they are by all logic so common and so unremarkable really (which is fitting because nearly everything about her is - she is the common cave spider afterall!) but theres this softness in the way she looks at him that makes it special. shame she doesn't like him seeing them though.
sorry for yapping this came out longer than i wanted it to but im just so desparate to share things and do things and have them be percieved. yeah
#selfship#frank castle#sona: meta menardi#ask meme#'sorry for yapping' this is literally meant for you to yap. girl.#time to be annoying get bent get fucked i do what i want#sorry. sorry
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STAR TREK: DISCOVERY | S1E5 "Choose Your Pain"
[I will react to each episode individually and in full, raw reception and then post as is unrevised here onto my tumblr for the full span of every and all NuTrek episodes and series that have been and will be released. If this falls under your field of interest - I welcome your company in joining me. Enjoy the ride.] -------
yeah i still dont like a black woman being "someone to fear burnham" idk guess we'll see. hmm i feel like there could be something in that telescope oml this view into the bridge and other facilities onboard discovery at the start of this episode is SO PRETTYYY let me LIVE. there. oh this is weird oh so space bear gets the titty stab but not burnham XD ofc ofc awww space bear depressed let him outttt id be depressed too, stuck in there with only a slop bucket and no moss in sight :/
ayyyyeee vulcan aboardd also why katrina's eyes are so red is she ok? bruh i been preoccupied by tardigrades too um ok lorca, mr. isaac clarke over here with your eye stabbery i kinda like lorca's face. hes so "f everything idgaf" oh my god the scale of the ship next to the shuttlepod
beat em up oh crap hmm hes gone so acting captain'll be saru thatll be interesting ugh i love this intro theres this feeling of utter suspension hearing and seeing it ugh seeing discovery fly through all these things and spin its so nice ugh the handssssssssssss i love the measurements and all these things and the constellations left behind ugh so much to see look at saruuuu cant wait till he frkn understands burnham's previous decisions and can stop treating her so blah i love his eyes WHO ARCHER JONATHAN AAAA PIKE CHRISTOPHER OH FUCKKKKK AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AND THEN IT WILL BE you know. you know. YOU. KNOW. oh my god ok shaking okokokokok MUDD DID YOU JUST SAY YOUR NAME IS MUDD MUDDDDDDDDDDD AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA oh my god this is so cool
oh dang. this poor guy. he was just in there to get foot in face. you sure are mudd. you sure do do that survivin. hi stamets. lmaooooo he knows hes brilliant - get it stamets own that shit it is kind of odd hearing burnham say such praise haha oh yeah its all BURNHAMS fault uhuh. cool to see some lone captain scenes its so odd to see such serious lighting in a trek production. listen. this is still all so NEW to me k. this guy ash tyler is pretty what is that its cute but also id be way to scared to come anywhere near that thing ughhh this outside shot of ncc discovery is so PRETTY thats so interesting? warp freeways because of space shrooms. damn. im with it.
DI DID DID DID THE THEY USE THE F WORD ON S T A R T R E K ???? DID THEY FUCKING USE THE FUCKING F BOMB ON FUCKING STAR TREK, ON THE FUCKING STAR TREK ARE YOU FUCKING SHITTING ME RIGHT FUCKING NOW HOLY FUCK I DID NOT I DID NOT HEAR THAT. my fucking mandible fell off when i heard that. i cannot believe what i just witnessed. i cannot believe my ears. not even AOS did the "fuck". oh my god "fuck" is canon in trek. that brought tears to my eyes hang on yall holy. shit… ima table that cuz i cant get over that idk when i can wow
saru has the perfect voice its so saru. its really cool to see his face like this the prosthetic is so great. it looks more real than (almost) anything pure cgi. cuz it IS real. i love it. beautiful example of practical effects. beautiful execution. also sorry but "predator"? really…? i dont appreciate burnham's treatment at all when its already bad enough that black women are almost always represented racially or with such a societal disdain cuz fucking EVERYONE hates black women. it is what critically annoys me in this series above all else so far :/ also sorry but WHAT THE FUCK DID STEWART DO HOW DARE YOU FUCKING THROW IT FUCK. YOU.
#LorcaNotMyCaptain
ugh not again with the titty stabbers. dude. this is slavery. let the fucking space bear go. look what you did to it. he shriveled up to survive. i HATE the treatment of other lifeforms in this series so far. CRACK IT OPEN? fuck you saru. fuck you too stamets. man everyone is so unlikeable. thats another issue i have in this show so far almost everyone is unlikeable af.
i didnt get to know phillipa that much so not much to say. burnham is so standoffish, idk if we have anough time to unravel her dimensionally. sylvia is kind of more annoying than endearing. lorca is lorca. ofc i dont like him (except i DO like an unperfect captain - i just wonder if hes redeemable). stamets is so catty like i get it yes be proud of your ideas that people might be ignorant towards but bruh still theres not enough good quality to counterbalance it so far. saru looks cool sure but hes so blatantly crass towards even other non-human lifeforms when he himself is non-human, cuz sry all that "crack it open" bullshit is gross af, desperation or not. i would NOT want him as my acting captain, ill say that, no matter how pretty he might be. i like ash tyler the most so far. i mean i get it its only episode 5 of 15 in s1 of 5 seasons - but still maybe im not too used to this many characters simultaneously being difficult to connect with. im gonna wait and see if this all develops. saru's feet. are hooflike his hands are so expressive his shape is so hes so lank. im SO impressed with how amazing he looks up close. i can SEE the subsurface scattering of his skin and the blood in his veins yeah please. we need this small talk with saru. thanks. k. i needed to see this redemptive quality in saru and co. cuz the getgo, everyones so adverse to alignment and connectivity
poor space bear i really hope you will be happy out there, mossie. youre FREEEE oh my god. space bear just warped. oh my god WARPING space bear. i need a plushie of it. mossie. stamets and doc. they gay for each other. they hubbies. they are literally brushing teeth together. yeuip. they gay. mhm. for sure. wow. first ever fucking explicitly gay couple in star trek. and it took this FUCKING long. i aint talking about TOS yall, we all know the love story that is the first 4 seasons + 6 classic films + 3 alternate reality films of Star Trek k - i just mean very literal and established archetypically, that makes sense. about fucking time. IDIC is literally mother gay but this took half an entire century to fucking show a gay couple onscreen. fuck me. k well. SNW Season 2 and 3, dont let us down. Im going to fucking die if theres even a wisp of something near Lower Deck's "K+S" carving scene. i digress.
alright DISCO, ima see how you unpack all this universal animosity, cuz damn are you thick with it in the first entire third of your first season.
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I was curious, are you in any fandoms? Or in general like a thing a lot.
oooohkay so. I'm not in any fandoms really, I don't watch online media enough to really say I'm in a fandom
HOWEVER
I am a HUGE science nerd. Especially about biology. I am constantly researching animals and their behavior especially with ocean animals and reptiles. I also really love insects. I'm planning to have a reptile/insect keeping room one day because I love them so much. I have literally told my girlfriend I rather have a blue tegu than a dog. I don't really like furry things all that much if I'm being honest, I relate a lot more to the types of animals people claim are unable to love. Like yeah they probably don't get the burst of oxycotin that humans get about things, but getting a lizard or snake to trust you enough to be held without pitching a fit is amazing!! They're demonized so much in media and I adore them. My main special interest is also sharks so take that for what you will. I relate a little too much to animals that people make out to be "evil".
I also have a big interest in psychology. My brain is ten different levels of fucked so I kinda like doing research into how brains normally function or hell, even how my brain functions. Like the fact that people with schizophrenia are (I think) 80% more likely to experience insomnia than the average person! I just thought I was bad at sleeping but no there's a reason for it! But I'm also a big fan about the science behind human sexuality. I won't get too into the facts of it cuz a lot of it is NSFW, but looking a the science behind getting it on and how it affects the brain and how fetishes and kinks form, ITS SO COOL. I also collect vintage erotica and gay porn because of this gkjdkjlkfldkgl.
I also just generally have a big love for queer history, learning about the aids crisis and the struggles that our community has faced but also just the fact that we've ALWAYS been here... It makes me feel less alone.
And like the last main thing I'm into is spirituality type stuff. I'm actually a certified pagan priest irl, but my disabilities and life circumstances have made me need to take a really big step back from the work I've been doing. But I've always fueled my work in this with the fact I have seen SO MANY people do it the wrong way, that I want to be a guiding force in doing it the right way.
Besides that, I'm really big into the punk anarchist scene, I like the vulture culture community on tumblr here and have a few specimens myself, I build legos and models a lot, I like art (obviously), I'm learning how to do leather, metal, and wood working, and also building costumes or restoring old clothes/shoes. I like music and singing a lot now that my voice has dropped from testosterone, I play Minecraft and the Sims a lot in my free time, I'm not big on video games but I'm trying to get into TF2 again. I'm getting pretty good at the Pokemon Trading Card Game, as well as Magic the Gathering (Magic is much slower than Pokemon TCG if I'm being honest, that game is complicated.)
To be honest most of what I watch on youtube is documentaries, food reviews, and reddit videos, haven't found any youtubers I'm particularly into. Honestly, I spend most of my time scrolling through tumblr and listening to rock music because I'm two weeks away from finally getting to go home after getting stuck in Texas for seven months and I'm kinda stuck in wait mode. Hopefully once I'm back in Chicago, I'll be doing a lot more hobby wise. I might even share some of it here if I get my old camera back.
But yeah, that was a big old ramble, I know it's weird for me to be on the fandom website and not be in any fandoms but it honestly takes a LOT for me to get into series of any kind. 100% of the series or fandoms I'm "into" it just cuz I have an alter from their source. Either way I hope this accurately answered your question! I appreciate being sent stuff a lot!
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HI i just got back from a like. 7 hour gaming session of the forest and SHITT MANN (RAMBLE)
we had a few goals, one was to put up spike walls for our upper base, n then another was to finish just small furniture things
the main one was to go to the caves and get the schematics cuz i wanted a glider. we GOT IT and it was all good and we made em but MANNN
my throat started to be like? TIGHT? feeling horribly paranoid and on edge for 7 hours straight will do that to you i guess
we went to the village for cloth and then fucking megan was there and i was like HM theres a PROBLEM leave now so we ran and listen
I WAS UNDER THE IMPRESSION that if you SLEPT they just despawned. my impression was incorrect ofc, when you sleep they just move a bit farther away
so.... we went back assuming she was gone and man! she was not gone! i pretty much made direct eye contact with her and my friend is so. SHE. the way like.. WHAT IF I DIDNT KNOWWWW
anytime i see somethin im like PROBLEM theres a problem theres an armsy, cowman, WHATEVER but no she has a sort of. freeze and then flee rresponse, so she saw megan and then saw it start to chase me and ran, said nothing which. GOOD THING I WAS PAYING ATTENTION.
i made some really interesting noises cuz i thought she was RIGHT on my tail like i kept hearing a weird whipping noise and i just thought it was over for me man. literally my friend was shocked cuz like.. IVE MADE SOME WEIRD NOISES WHEN IM SCARED ALRIGHT
being chased in horror games is one of my favorite like... TO ME thats the scariest thing i hate chases they mentally overwhelm me to the point where when im watching someone play a game and their getting chased, i have to pause the video every 3 seconds because i physically cant handle how stressed it makes me SKFJS
so... imagine that but its me and there is no pausing!!!!! horrible awful
we antagonized her a bit and lured her around cuz. for SCIENCE i needed to get close to this creature and hear how she sounded, so i know what to listen for
she despawned eventually which sucks cuz it was right when i was gonna call upon my monster hunter skills and kick her ass but no she vanished (scared obviously)
THAT WASNT THE END THO, no of course not.. so we built our house in the same exact spot markiplier and his friends built theres. it looks pretty similar too (rock walls, 3 doors, you get it) and last time we played, we branched upwards to the area above us. so we built proper walls and weve got 3 cabins up there for each of us and its cute its our little base with our other watch towers
i hate it up there!!! actually despise it, cuz of how the trees are and the hill its hard to see incoming threats, and we tend to log up there for convenience so. ITS EVEN WORSE when im trying to track several things with my ears at once. gotta listen for deer so i dont get scared, gotta tune out my friends chainsaw (i never log with the chainsaw for this reason, i need my ears so bad when im playing horror/survival games KSJFS), gotta listen for THREATS and look too im reallllll paranoid. IT SUCKS
last time we played, we got wormed, i didnt even see it because i was just hanging out up top finishing our walls and this bitch said "WORM." and she had ALREADY ziplined down to our main house since the cabins werent done yet. i was HORRIFIED because i didnt hear a damn thing!!!! i know worm is quieter but.. when SHE notices something before i do, something has gone wrong KSFJSF so.. it spawned behind, i forgot we had a zipline and threw myself (successfully) down the mountain by habit and i saw little worm bits fall down behind me before i quit the game
THIS TIME, it spawned behind her, and right in front of me while we were going to place the tower for the gliders
literally just glooped up from the ground i didnt even realize what i was looking at at first?? and i was like ah! WORM and we left the game so fast (we dont want that smoke hush)
but we got paranoid because. last time it spawned, she saved and THEN left, so it despawned and that was our worm spawn of the month right
but this time we both just LEFT so i was worried maybe it didnt save the spawn and it would spawn again, yknow? so bottom image is us both hiding up in the towers cuz i was. GENUINELY AFRAID TO TOUCH THE FLOOR
i thought it would just. POP UP BEHIND ME. i think we got really unlucky. cuz i dont think its meant to spawn AT US yknow? like i dont think its programmed to spawn where we are on purpose, its jsut really unlucky that BOTH TIMES it was RIGHT UP HERE SKFJSFS
thats why i hate it up here, its worm hell!!!!! fuck all that
its fine tho we did it, we made our gliders and flew around a bit it was fun
it sucked cuz like... we needed cloth and her cloth things were kinda bugged? cuz they werent respawning for her so.. IT WAS ALL ON ME and i HATE going anywhere in the forest. limited visibility, too far from the water, its all bad man
and the last few times!!! once was a cowman, 2nd was megan twice!!!!!!! so i was so fucking reluctant to go grab them but the last time we went, we put on our paint, we were careful (also i told this mfer i said bestie i need you to be my eyes while im trying to look for cloth and she said okay o7 and i turned around and shes like all the way down the hill not looking for me 💀💀)
we went in and got everything and no one even showed up!!! man i was nervous tho kSKFJS so we go it, finished our gliders and flew
overall, horrible day! everytime i got scared like when i was being chased my heart wouldnt even just drop, it would SEIZE UP it legitimately HURT
only good part is i realized i wanted to recreate my cabin in sons of the forest cuz i could put on overhang over my patio like i wanted to (mine is the house with the red icon)
anyways im fucking exhausted and i need to destress so im gonna keep writing my story lmao
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Just gonna post some Sayid screenshots. I wonder how many people unfollowed me by now.... LMFAO
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Sayid with hair in his face is cute but it has the unfortunate side effect of covering his face.
Charlie is also contemplating the pros and cons of Sayids pretty hair in his face. (citation needed)
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I think this is the first time he smiles in the show and then he smiles like 10 other times and thats it. In the whole show. Neither of them know how hard theyll go for each other in the future.
Also Sayid reminds me of the cheetah in that post.
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Hair half in his face is a good look. Cuz you get pretty curly hair AND pretty face at the same time. This is the way.
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Kate and Sayid watching Shannon and Boone bicker is so funny. They really said 👀😒*listening intently*
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g g girls... pr... ..etty
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Parallel play with the besties.
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Whyd they have to look at Hurley like this... what did he do to deserve this... Mean girl behavior.
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Kate, probably: Dick from terrible men hits different when you got the baddest bitch you know in your ear telling you he aint worth it.
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Sayid being a completely rational, reasonable man on an island where everything is unreasonable and irrational... he doesnt deserve this.
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Sayid pulling the trigger on Danielle and her telling him she removed the pin and that her lover didnt notice the missing pin either... then later when Danielle gives him another gun he checks the pin just in case.
We love a man who can learn from his mistakes.
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Ben didnt even say thank you after Sayid served this hard in front of him. Thats crazy.
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Pretty... this warm lighting is such a good look. If it was bad for Sayid to torture 'Henry Gale' then why so pretty?
And also he was right so.
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Sayid: Everything was just as you said it would be... but I still didnt believe you... so I dug up the grave.
Ben (in his head probably): .... who the fuck digs up a grave....
Everything worked out so well for Ben when it came to Jack and Locke... Sayid beat the shit out of him and almost shot him in the face for it. LMFAO.
Honestly I would have loved to see the look on Ana Lucia and Charlies face when Sayid just gets to his knees and starts ripping at the ground with his bare hands.... cuz its not like they had a shovel.... so Sayid had to have dug up that grave with his hands. Put those nails to good use.
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Pretty.... also Sayid big tiddie tan lines...? Real?👀
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Sayid talks about dying like he thinks he deserves it so its interesting that he always fights so hard to live. I guess its cuz he always has a mission like finding Nadia or protecting the Oceanic survivors in one way or another... he did tell Jack he was 'willing to give his life but he wont give it for nothing.'
Also... the fake nurses face as Sayid wraps his own IV tube around the dudes throat is so fucking funny. Bro realized he was not built for this.
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At least Sayid is polite enough not to kill someone at Jacks work? Like he killed everyone else that got close to his people... some dude died getting slammed onto a bunch of upright knives like Sayid was an agent for Death in the Final Destination franchise. He just shot you with your own tranquilizer gun...
You didnt even thank him for it.
Jack didnt either.
Men are so rude to Sayid.
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ughh
i keep having like? i keep having dreams where my mom protects me and its kind of upsetting me
why is it so frequent? i keep having them where she keeps me safe or says she'll always be here for me, and if its not my mom directly its some motherly figure protecting me. im like GROWN TOO im not a little kid but i always feel like i am, i feel so powerless, helpless, afraid.. and i hide behind my mom because she will keep me safe, right?
this time it was my sister, she was being so fucking mean to me like how she used to, to the point where like. i had to go in this building with her and her bf and she told me to get out of the car real hostile like and i was clearly scared and about to cry and my mom was like hey. we'll go together, okay? and she held my hand and the building? was like this dark like. SOME KIND OF LIQUOR/SMOKE SHOP, it stressed me out and then when my mom came with me it turned into a pretty candy store and she let my sibling get whatever they want but . im too conscious of our money so i didnt get anything before the dream switched
then i was at like? the store owner had these policies ensuring people didnt ABUSE THEIR KIDS in her store, saying like hey. if yr kid tries and steals something, ill catch them, no need to yell at them or get physical. if theyre loud, its alright, theres plenty of other kids here so its probably gonna be loud regardless like. idk it made me really sad cuz that meant she had dealt with it enough to make explicit rules about children being hurt or scared in her building. and immediately my brain knew she was someone i could trust
my family like left but . i got in the car with my moms husband instead cuz i thought they were gonna get in but he drove off too fast and then he was being really reckless and driving into oncoming traffic and shit and it was really scary cuz hes like. ive been in the car with him pulled over by the cops cuz he was speeding before he drives so horribly i feel so unsafe when he drives, and yknow who it makes me think of? my mom, because even if my mom has bad road rage, shes safer than him
the car crashed obviously and i was hurt and scared and i just wanted my mom and i managed to make it back to the candy store cuz it had like a proper daycare section now i guess?? and i dont know. my moms bf was like unhinged and i. ive had too many dreams where im afraid of him, afraid of what he'll do. i made it back to the place and i guess the kids there were also scared cuz they knew he was gonna come back and the lady was like reassuring us and she said that no ones getting hurt here, and that shes gonna do everything in her power to keep us safe
idk it made me feel good that like. even though i was obviously an adult she was still there to comfort me and assure me cuz i was fucking scared, just like the kids were i was terrified and she didnt exclude me from that safety
i think i have mommy issues guys 💀💀 i dont know why i keep having these dreams. maybe being neglected as a child makes you grow up too fast and then you suddenly cant be grown up enough when yr actually an adult. when they fight, i feel so small.. i feel like a child again, listening to violence thru the walls. i wish i could be brave, i wish i could be a MAN, be an adult, but im too scared..
why does my head crave that motherly comfort? i dont understand.. my mom isnt a bad mom. shes an okay mom, not a great PERSON, but an okay mom. shes done a lot for me and i appreciate it, but.. be there for me is not one of them. maybe im sad, maybe i wish i could have a mother that i can say with 100% certainty i love. i wish i could have a mom who was there for me and cared more about me and i wish she was .
she used to be really mean to me, after she kicked her bf out several years ago (got us nothing in the end cuz hes fucking back so whatever) . i think she missed fighting and needed someone to focus her anger on. i remember one time she came into my room and screamed at me for doing something wrong? something i DIDNT do, and then when she found out it was my sibling who did it, i guess she tired herself out cuz she just said whatever
it got so bad that like. everyone knew she was treating me unfairly. my siblings thought she was, i thought she was, and SHE thought she was. that time we were sitting in the car with my sister and she was like yeah im too mean to you, you dont deserve that. and i was just. quiet. what do i say? do i say 'yes, you are too mean to me'? probably not, my sister is my moms number one yes man, if i said anything implying my mom was less than an angel she'd direct her anger towards me. AGAIN. but i cant say no cuz that would be a lie. i just said it was fine and she said it wasnt and that was the end of it. i dont even remember if things changed
or like that time? she called me a disappointment for failing in highschool and when i jsut left, and went and sat in my siblings room, SOMETIMES she feels remorse and she comes and apologizes cuz i think deep down she does love me. but this time? no, she just came in and KEPT going, saying it was my fault and that she doesnt have shit to apologize for. okay!!!! that was when the elections were happening too , thats when she started becoming a worse person, more right wing yknow. its sad watching someone i used to admire dissolve into just.. garbage, yknow? ugh
i almost had a panic attack at my grandparents house one time cuz she raised her voice like. not AT me but i was still there and then my sister started harassing me when i got all quiet cuz i was SCARED and my brother and grandma tried to stick up for me but i just went to the back room and i couldnt fucking breathe. and then later my sister had the audacity? when we went to the park later she was like hey. btw. its not MY fault you were being weird like. whatever, fuck off
i wish i loved my family!!!!! i wish i had a family i was capable of loving. i wish i had a family who didnt hurt me, i wish i had a family that didnt make me feel like.. like im not always safe in my home. ive never ever felt safe, from my earliest memories to my most recent, its just.. carnage. dreadful
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