#to descend on me because they see me talking trash!

[funny---pics]

What the fuck is this

@staff @wip @support

"original posts only" as an opt-in?? If you have to make a useless change, at least don't make it the default!

And no way of letting bloggers choose whether or not they want their reblogs to show in the tag search, when until now that has always just been blog specific and people use weird tag systems on their blogs specific only to their blogs??

I don't tag for the search, it doesn't make sense for posts to show up there when I just tag stuff or people the posts remind me of, not what's actually in the post, or trash talk about a fandom I don't like and I definitely don't want that to show up in the search for people who are looking for content in that fandom.

Staff if you feel the need to keep that weird update around, at least make it so we can choose whether or not we want our reblog tags to count for the search!

Best would be an opt-in button per reblogged post, so the default would still be to not show them. Maybe in addition to that a blog settings thing to change whether you want to generally share reblogs to search or not, to always turn the slider to 'on', but the original default should definitely be 'off', holy f-

And a setting for when you make an original post, for whether you want ppls reblog-tags to even be allowed to show in the search, would be very appreciated too.

[lej222]

Supernatural Involvement and Ominous Signs in ASLFUA

For a while, many readers have theorized that there is some kind of a higher power/higher being in ASLFUA, and looking at the latest episodes it seems to have been confirmed. With this post, I've tried to gather every instance of the higher power's implied presence and all the ominous scenes in the story. I also included foreshadowing scenes that could have made Miae aware of certain things if she had paid attention because coincidences are important in the story, and certain moments that were defining in the plot. The list contains spoilers for the newest KR episodes and it keeps being updated.

Episode 2 :

Miae is reading a book in the library about how the last day of 1999 will be the end of the world: "'1999, a terrifying overlord is coming...the end of the human race.." -> this might be a reference to the famous prophecy of Nostradamus in which in the 7th month of 1999 a great king of terror would descend from the skies (which makes me think...is it July in the story right now?)

The Hwang family's phone stops working

Miae's dresser breaks and therefore she has to take out the trash, where she sees Cheol crying

"This boy is about to be this girl's most special person, someone whom she will never be able to forget."

Episode 3

Miae and her mother visit the Buddha statue and Miae's wish is not to be in the same class with Cheol - it doesn't come true.

Miae, Cheol and Jisu all become classmates in their last year. Miae and Cheol become deskmates by coincidence.

Episode 4

Cheol's furniture becomes Miae's, along with the contents of his dresser, something only he knows about

Episode 5

Yunhui calls Miae on their new cordless phone, the line is interrupted by another conversation, "Did you get the present I sent you?" - it sounds like a message to Miae from the higher power about Cheol

Episode 8

Miae ruins her bangs, her mother says she should do something about her hair - the first time we are told Miae should go to a hairdresser to fix it

Hwanggeum Academy uses corporal punishment - might be relevant later on?

Miae has to go to karaoke so she gives up on going to the hair salon (this foreshadowing is super crazy btw)

Episode 9

Cheol is compared to the protagonist of the comic Miae reads, 'My First Love Next Door Is Number 1' - gets into trouble and transfers, fights the school bully and wins, nicknamed Lucifer, has a facial scar, lives next door

As Miae is thinking about Cheol, her thoughts are interrupted by a cockroach in the classroom

Episode 11

Miae notes how strange it is that she keeps seeing Cheol while they didn't bump into each other the previous year (just like how Jisu later keeps commenting how strange he keeps meeting Miae) - Miae acknowledges the higher power

Yunhui's pager says "between friends goodbye"

Episode 12

Miae has a weird feeling when she's talking to Cheol's shoe as if it understands what she's saying

Episode 15

In her dream, Miae remembers Cheol crying and her making a wish with a stone tower about how she wants to be his friend. The phone suddenly rings, the TV becomes static and there's a storm outside despite the weather forecast not saying anything about it. The other end of the phone is silent and the lights go out.

Episode 17

Cheol's shoe gets smudged with ink so Miae cannot give it back to him. She cannot concentrate on her practice test, foreshadowing her involvement with Cheol's academy.

Episode 21

Miae again remembers some memories about Cheol saying he doesn't want to be her friend while she's sleeping

Side note: while Soonkki is a great writer, there's some inconsistency about Jisu's seating arrangement. I think she always meant him to sit in Block 1, that's why we got limited panels of that area of the classroom, but his position kept changing until his official introduction. Here, he should have been sitting in front of Seonghan, but there's another boy in that seat. In episode 23, we get a panel of Block1 again, and there's a boy who looks like Jisu from behind in that.

She again remembers her time with Cheol while sleeping on the bus

Episode 24

Daebak Academy notebook says "The teacher is spoon-feeding you, so why can't you pass" -> the higher power is giving hints to Miae, why can't she understand them?

Episode 29

Miae thinks about how she doesn't bump into Cheol as much as before, we get a close-up of the shoe and the Daebak Academy notebook

Episode 37

Miae falls on Cheol while playing soccer

Episode 39

Miae and Cheol are arguing but still bump into each other because of their parents

While Miae thinks about how Cheol should smile at people, she almost gets hit by a ball but Cheol saves her.

Episode 40

Cheol goes to Miae's house to do their homework. Miae's mother says she wonders if it will rain before she leaves. Cheol tries to change the lightbulb in Miae's room, but the lights go out because of the storm. Miae thinks "again?" and they fall on each other. She tells Cheol they should be friends.

Episode 41

Cheol agrees to be Miae's friend and we see a flashback of young Miae wishing they would be friends. While they are doing their homework the rain stops. Miae says planes even fly in the rain and Cheol replies that airplanes fly above the clouds.

Episode 42

Miae answers their phone and the line is interrupted again. Someone thanks their boss for the present and says they will do well on their own from now. -> is it a sign Miae should do well on her own after the hints?

Interesting to note that every time Miae might be involved with the higher power, certain objects in her room are highlighted - Cheol's shoe, the lamp, the notebooks. They all give signs to Miae that she keeps ignoring.

Episode 43

Cheol and Yonghui point out that Miae should get a haircut. Miae ends up cutting it herself instead of going to a salon.

Episode 45

Miae wishes upon a star instead of a plane so that the presentation in class will go okay. This actually comes true, as also noted by the narrator in ep 46.

Episode 46

Daebak Academy booklet says "nothing comes easy"

Episode 47

Something I've noticed is that throughout the story Miae keeps thinking she forgot something, and there's usually a situation that seems like the answer to it. Here, it turns out she forgot about Jinseop's homework. And Taekwang's song is about how someone cannot do both things at the same time. It was the same when she forgot about her homework while playing soccer. Forgetting about things is a recurring plot point for Miae, which culminates in the Jisu subplot where we learn Miae completely forgot about his existence even though she didn't have many friends who were boys.

Episode 50

Cheol's father wants to take a picture of Cheol and Miae, but Cheol refuses

Episode 51

Miae again cuts her own hair and wonders if she cut it too straight

Episode 55

Cheol kicks Miae's pencil into Jisu's chair (side note: you can see here again how Jisu's seating arrangement was inconsistent, he should have been closer to the window)

Episode 56

Miae gets sent out to the corridor with Jisu

Miae's friends talk about handsome boys and someone mentions the number1 student (Jisu)

Episode 60

Jisu becomes Miae's folk dance partner - the first time Cheol and Miae are not doing something together

Episode 61

Hwanggeum Academy booklet says "there's nothing you can't do if you put the work in, do not expect a miracle" when Miae is struggling with the dance

Episode 65

Cheol's father takes a picture of Cheol and Miae after the sports festival

Episode 66

In Miae's dream, Cheol's sister says for a while means 5-6 yrs, Miae counts she will be in middle school by then. There's also a memory of Miae running after Cheol, saying "wait for me".

Miae's mother tells her to get a haircut but Miae replies she needs a bigger allowance for it.

The narrator says Miae should watch where she's walking after she bumps into Cheol.

Episode 67

Miae loses her name tag and Jisu finds it

Episode 70

Miae wonders how her wishes never come true, but remembers she also made one with the stone tower as a kid, but cannot recall what it was about.

Episode 71

Miae's mom notes their phone keeps ringing since yesterday. The day before Miae wanted to tease Cheol with how she heard him saying he "loved her" in the shop and she saw him shirtless the same night.

Miae doesn't realize it was Jisu who called her a pervert

Episode 72

Miae notices someone wearing her name tag (Jisu), but doesn't find the culprit

Episode 75

Cheol wants to ask Miae something, but the homeroom teacher interrupts. Miae and Jisu get called to the teachers' room and have to do cleaning duty together for a week.

Episode 76

We see Miae's mom at a hair salon - could the lady in orange be Jisu's mother? who knows

Episode 77

Cheol stands up for Miae, but when Honggyu asks if they are dating, they both vehemently deny it. It suddenly starts raining.

Episode 78

Miae and cheol promise to be friends for real, forever. The narration comments, "But will they end up regretting their promise?". The rain stops. "1999, the final year of the century is half over" -> Miae's story is half over at this point. I have pointed out this before, but the series seems to be about the transition period between childhood and young adulthood, symbolized by the last year before the new millennium. Hence the title, 'green apple academy'

In her dream, Miae remembers asking Cheol if they are friends. She is awoken by their phone. the Daebak Academy notebook says "you are in danger if you are relaxed" and we see a girl talking to Cheol.

Episode 81

Cheol and Miae fall on each other and almost kiss, but the phone rings. Later, they do end up in the same position with an accidental kiss.

Episode 82

Miae wants to confront Cheol about the kiss and gets embarrassed, but her actions are interrupted when the trash bag she gave Jisu splits open, spilling its contents. Miae runs to him to collect it.

Episode 83

While Miae talks to her friends, she thinks back on her memories with Cheol and the narration says "I always liked.." and Miae looks surprised by it.

Episode 86

Interesting detail that Cheol doesn't know why Miae keeps looking at airplanes. If we assume she has a reason for doing it from the past, it's likely not related to Cheol.

Episode 87

Miae uses the trashbag as an excuse to run away from Cheol, repeating how she has to throw it out. All of a sudden, Jisu appears and takes it out of her hand, giving her a chance to run. It's just my personal theory that the trashbag here symbolizes Miae's vulnerability and reluctance to face her feelings, and Jisu takes it from her hand. It makes sense when we remember how his words made her think about her actions when she wanted to interrupt the confession. It's a great early foreshadowing that Jisu might play an important role in Miae's growth story as her voice of reason.

Episode 89

Cheol and Miae take photos together in a photo booth, first with Jinseop and Song-I, then the two of them alone. We don't know if Miae still has her pictures, but we can assume she somehow lost them during running around from the bullies because we never see them again. Cheol gives her a new name tag in the next episode.

Episode 95

Cheol gifts Miae an airplane model for her birthday. I personally believe this episode marks the end of the first part of the story and it's a turning point, but more about this under ep96.

While Miae leaves for school, their phone suddenly rings and her mom answers it. Miae sees posters about love on her way to school. For the first time, Jisu arives early for cleaning duty.

Episode 96

The series has had 2 symbolic illustrations at the end of 2 episodes. The first one was at the end of ep2, when Cheol and Miae's story started in the present:

Miae is offering a green apple to Cheol - a biblical allusion, here, the green apple probably signifies how Miae helps Cheol in the first part of the story to mature and grow as a person with her own knowledge.

This illustration comes at the end of ep96. Like I mentioned, I believe this marks the start of the second half of the story which focuses on Miae's growth as a person. Space is an important concept in the series, Miae also has planet stickers on the wall of her room,has a charm on her bag, etc.

"16 years old. An age much like the universe." "16 years old. An age where it's like you're thrown into space." - highlights the narration.

But why is it compared to space? We have the illustration right after Jisu splashes water on Miae's face and Cheol wakes up from his dream. In my opinion, it's because this is where these kids' limited worlds start to expand. In part 1, Cheol and Miae were mainly together, but as you grow up you start to feel like you're just one insignificant part of a greater whole. You might feel like you're the center of the universe when you're a teenager, and that the world is ending when you experience negative emotions, but as the illustration shows us, it's not just Miae and Cheol standing alone in the universe. There are other people, facing different directions, but they are all interconnected by an invisible force. Miae is looking at Cheol, but Jisu is standing in her shadow- because even though she was not aware of him, Jisu had his own life happening parallel to what we saw in part1, and this is where he starts to have an intersection with Miae. If there is a higher power in the story, it is aware of all these connections and talks about youth in a nostalgic way. The sense that these moments are fleeting is always present in the story, however, connections formed between individuals will always have a lasting impact, just like how the universe will continue to exist. Being thrown into space might feel like losing your footing, but here it's the personal relationships that ground these teenagers and make them stay close to Earth.

Episode 98

The teacher tells Miae to cut her hair after Jisu takes the blame for ruining the plant.

Cheol is acting strange because of his dream, and while Jisu looks at Miae the narration box says: "16 years old. An age riddled with the unknown, just like the universe."

Episode 99

Miae's hair gets stuck in the zipper of Cheol's bag and he pulls it out, ruining her bangs in the process. They go to the infirmary after Miae gets scratched by the zipper.

Episode 100

At the countryside, while Miae picked a flower she thought how nice it would be if Cheol came to her school - and it became true. She thinks how it was so strange -> Miae again unknowingly acknowledges the higher power when it comes to Cheol

Episode 101

It's raining and the TV is not working in Cheol's home. He remembers taking a picture with Miae in the countryside. He asks his father about the picture on the sports day -> the data was lost. Miae gets grounded by her mother and she wants her to quit the academy.

Episode 102

I've mentioned symbolic objects in the story, but this one was noted by other readers as well: in ep 101, Miae accidentally drops the chalkboard eraser out of the window and Jisu fails to catch it - but Cheol does. However, in this episode Miae tosses it back to Jisu before saying she hopes they'll never see each other again (it's the first, but not the last time she declares it).

Cheol fails to convince Miae's mom about the academy -> Miae's mom points out Miae's grades have been dropping since last year. She makes her stance clear - she wants Miae to study.

Episode 103

It's raining and Miae cannot open Cheol's drawer in her room.

She tries to cut her hair, but the phone rings. On the other line, Miae hears someone saying "I only did what I did because you wanted it so bad, but you screwed up that chance! You don't deserve that project, I'm going to hand it to someone else." -> the first time the higher power tries to directly say Miae is late

Miae's mom cuts her hair instead of sending her to a salon...

Miae loses the name tag Cheol gave her

Episode 104

Jisu says "see you again" to Miae (and will keep saying for a while lol). Miae points out she never wanted to see him again.

Episode 106

After the teacher discovers their conversations in class, Miae and Cheol get separated and Miae becomes Jisu's deskmate. Miae and Cheol are not allowed to interact until the final exams are over.

Hwanggeum Academy's notebook remarks "Do you regret it now?"

Episode 107

Miae dreams about the flower from the countryside and a voice says she should hurry up and do what she wants about her wish if she remembers. She doesn't remember and the voice gets angry, Cheol appears and crushes the flower, telling her if she doesn't remember she should just forget it. The voice remarks Cheol is angry because Miae is late.

Episode 111

Jisu, who has also become aware of the coincidences, tells Cheol he's not the only one having something special with Miae.

When Miae calls Jisu her friend from the same class and tells him he should learn for himself, Jisu tries to say something, but he is interrupted by Cheol.

Episode 112

Miae thinks about their bet and how she should ask something serious, something more than friends do from Cheol, and we get a bunch of error messages. Cheol's dream is all fuzzy.

Jisu wins the bet, but we never get to know his wish because Miae gets angry at him.

Episode 115

The narration points out Cheol has changed and matured a lot, is it Miae's turn?

Episode 116

We see some posters about a summer festival, the forest in Midsummer Night's Dream and how everything is the product of coincidence.

The forest in Shakespeare's play is dominated by the supernatural - what we have in common with this story is the forest Miae and Cheol played together as kids, and obviously the involvement of a higher power. The coincidences poster is possibly a reference to Carl Jung's Synchronicity, a concept that states that seemingly meaningful coincidences have a deeper meaning, they don't have a rational explanation - almost like destiny, a deeper order in the universe. It's a connection between one's psyche and the material world (so you have to notice and acknowledge the deeper meaning of these coincidences in order to experience synchronicity). Jung used this to argue for the existence of the paranormal. For example, if you cannot decide something, you might come across a book on the topic. What a coincidence, right? In this interpretation, everything is interconnected in the universe, and we are a part of this web of connections. So those coincidences...were actually not coincidences. -> Hmmmmm.....I wonder.....meaningful coincidences, the universe, connections...why do they sound familiar??? BECAUSE OUR STORY IS EXACTLY ABOUT THIS NOTION! Who notices these coincidences? Miae about Cheol, Jisu about Miae....One has to be open to the possibility of the connection between our inner world and the outside world, only then they can start to notice the signs the universe is sending them. Soonkki, you deserve my applause! Because it was exactly what I said about the art at the end of ep 96 and the placement of the characters. Mind? Blown!

Miae thinks that she feels something is wrong

Yunhui's pager says friends goodbye

Jisu gets involved in the Yonghui-Yunhui storyline by coincidence

Episode 117

We see all the coincidences from Jisu's perspective and how he became aware of them. And what does he say about them? That they are fascinating and kind of funny! My boy Jisu got the synchronicity message.

This is the 3rd time Miae and Jisu didn't hold hands. The first time Miae pretended to help him up, only for him to fall back. Then Jisu held out his hand after the exam, but she didn't take it. Here, he again reaches out and Miae doesn't take his hand. Remember this later!

Episode 118

Someone steps on Cheol's bag, and he's worried it might be Taeuk

Jisu wants to join in another bet in exchange for his help

Episode 119

Jisu gets involved in the Shim storyline, and as we know from later he picks up the cigarettes to get revenge on him

Episode 122

Miae learns that Cheol rejected Seonyeong and the lights flicker in her room

She cannot remember her dream. The narration says that she should have realized that something changed.

Episode 123

Miae notes that she experienced the kiss in the comic book with Cheol

Jisu almost catches her, but Cheol pushes him away

Episode 126

The parents are having dinner together at a pig feet restaurant and toast for the future of their children. The TV is not working, and a boy who looks like Jisu tries to fix it.

Miae kisses Cheol

Episode 127

Miae has a dream again in the white dress. As she realizes she might like Cheol, the voice says she's too late and there's no use regretting it.

Episode 129

Miae remembers that they took a picture in the countryside together and wants to take one now. She makes a wish to an airplane about how she just wants one photo, and remarks that the planes never granted her wish before. Spoiler, they won't this time, either.

Miae chooses to take the picture with Cheol. The narration box says "she's always done whatever she sets her mind to. That has always been one of her better attributes. But Mi-ae, it seems as though you keep forgetting something. I told you, you're too late."

The pager's message means idiot, cancelled and it suddenly starts raining. Maie and Cheol cannot take their photo and Cheol cannot give her back the hairpin she dropped a few eps ago.

Episode 132

Graduation photos were postponed until the second semester

In Miae's dream, the voice says she's all over the place and cannot decide what she wants from Cheol. In her memory, Miae wishes at the stone tower that Cheol would like her back. The voice angrily remarks how it must not mean much to her.

Episode 133

While Cheol and Miae are looking at each other, Miae is smacked in the face by a flyer. Later while they are riding the bike, Cheol almost says she looks pretty but he is hit in the face with a flyer that belonged to Jisu.

Episode 134

Miae takes the cigarettes from Jisu and puts them in her backpack

While Jisu and Miae look at each other, the narration box says "Well. this is what we would call fate. What do you think?" Miae can sense the voice and dismisses it.

Jisu again says "see you later" and Miae answers let's not, but Jisu replies they never know and it would be fun.

On the radio in Miae's room there's a voice speaking, asking if it was a success and how there is something you can't stop thinking about. "A friend? The fact that you weren't wrong? Whatever it is, I don't think it's such a bad thing to obsess over it a little bit. I hope you have no regrets about it."

Episode 135

Miae's eyebrow and bangs are so ruined she has to finally go to a hair salon. Yunhui gives her money and says there's a cheap place where she can go. It turns out Jisu's mother is a hairdresser and after realizing she is Jisu's friend, she doesn't ask for money. So if anyone ever wondered why Miae kept ruining her hair in the story, here's the answer....

a little bit of strange wording here:

The narration says "Now that I think about it, this was about the time..wait,no, it was a little bit earlier that things started to go wrong, little by little. You two were completely oblivious, though. Just you two."

Miae's mother goes to the academy. One theory I can give on this is that Miae's family might be moving. She wished for it at the start of the story, mentions it in a later episode as well. Who knows ~

Episode 138

Miae doesn't tell Cheol her feelings because of her pride as she feels like she would lose first

Miae has a feeling as if something is trying to make her look bad in front of Cheol and her gun suddenly starts working

Everybody forgot to buy the picture they took together in ep 139

Episode 140

After conveying their feelings indirectly to each other, Miae tells Cheol they cannot date right now because her mom wouldn't allow it. She plans to go to the same high school, university, everything and thinks there's no one to stop them so nothing can go wrong.

Episode 141

Cheol imagines high school together with Miae and their friends

Every time Cheol is flustered, he accidentally drinks his sister's coffee and he cannot sleep at night..in a story where dreams are relevant I'm sure this is just a coincidence, right???🧐🙃😏

Miae says they should not be obvious before the entrance exam and they start to think of it as a competition

Someone watches them from the street

Episode 144-145

We get everything from Cheol's POV

Cheol got his scar because he wanted to give Miae the romance book she liked before they left and he fell on the stone tower

The picture his dad took of them is about a young Cheol accidentally kneeling with flowers in his hands, the same flowers from Miae's dream, in front of Miae. This picture was in the book Cheol and his family kept.

Cheol realized the book was in his dresser that is now in Miae's room, the one she couldn't open before

Episode 146

Miae sees two flyers in the newspaper, one is about how a student still didn't give it up, the other is about changing one's car

On the street, the same car ads keep flying after her in the wind

Miae goes with Yonghui to wait in a line and the same flyers are all over the place

Episode 147

Miae wants to call Cheol, but Jisu stops her. Miae notices how often they have met during vacation, and Jisu says these coincidences are fun. He remarks it's almost like as if some higher power is involved (!!). Miae is standing on the car ad, they look down on it with Jisu, then she kicks it away. Jisu tells her he has a feeling they will meet again, but Miae hopes they won't.

The academy is also full of the car ads and Miae falls on them

Miae thinks that for a while she's had a feeling as if something wants to get between her and Cheol, but brushes it off

Miae ends up with a bubble gum in her hair and goes to Jisu's house to fix it. Jisu tells her she should stay because he is bored, and there is a car ad on a stool.

Episode 148

We see some of Jisu's childhood memories and he was called a magpie by Miae which was a symbolic choice (I also made a post about it). Jisu in this story is the grateful magpie.

Miae and Jisu "touch hands" for the first time when they high-five (I wrote about how their hand hold never happened before)

After spotting some men smoking, Jisu tells Miae to go inside (one of them might be his father?)

Episode 149

Miae finally remembers Jisu

the narration boxs keeps saying how Jisu is cool and showing heart-thumping sounds and Miae is confused about these strange things

Miae not remembering Jisu was an important plot point considering she recalled everyone else from her past. As I theorized, memories and fate seem to be intertwined, the synchronicity theory also supports this. Synchronicity happens when seemingly unrelated events coincide and they become significant to you. It's easy to see why Jisu was aware of this notion, but Miae was not - because Miae had no idea about those coincidences other than meeting Jisu randomly. Him being her classmate, being the one who found her pencil, who helped her in the crowd, found her name tag, etc. - only Jisu knew about these. But right now, Miae was made aware that they knew each other in the past - a pretty big coincidence.

So now that Miae might have kickstarted her own fate, the question is whether she will be able to fight it or if there are certain things bound to happen no matter what. Is the narrator omnipotent and omniscient? So many questions that will hopefully get answered.

Episode 150

For the first time, Miae says she and Jisu will see each other again sometime. Before this, it was always Jisu who said it and Miae would reply that she didn't want to meet him again.

Miae remembers Jisu transferring, but doesn't know why he singled her out (so she will probably recall more memories later)

As Miae leaves Jisu's house, the car ads are flying in the air around her

Jisu enrolls at the academy and for the first time he says it's not a coincidence

Episode 155

Hwani tells her mother it would be great if they could keep being neighbours with Miae because she's fun. After a pause, Cheol's mother agrees.

Jisu keeps telling Miae she's a "traitor" or "bat" (depending on the translation, meaning she keeps secrets from others like the Yonghui Yunhui situation and the fact that she went to Jisu's house) and she might get into trouble because of that

Episode 156

The narrator directly communicates with Miae again, and informs us about Miae's thoughts. It makes heart-thumping sounds when she's with Jisu just like in previous episodes, but Miae ignores them.

Jisu again says how the coincidences are so fun. He counts to three until the teacher interrupts Miae and Cheol's bickering (similarly to Taekwang in ep 158)

When Jisu tells Miae he'll go out of the room to let her talk with Cheol, Miae thinks she'll talk to him regardless of anyone's interference and we get a close-up of an academy notebook saying 'NO' and a plane flying in the sky.

Episode 158

Flashforward in the episode to a scene with Cheol leaving Miae at the academy while a storm is coming and Miae looks like she's about to cry

An hour earlier in the story the dark clouds are already gathering (I mentioned how rainy weather is always connected to the change in Miae and Cheol's relationship, and how it's usually an ominous sign). After seeing Jisu's flustered face, Cheol tells Miae that he wants to change the lightbulb in her house before she gets hurt. The lights at the academy are highlighted as they keep vibrating. (I also noted how the lights are signs of the supposed higher power, they get their own panels in Miae's room, and they went out 2 times when Miae and Cheol's relationship changed)

After Jisu reveals that Miae was in his house and Cheol gets angry, Miae's pager starts buzzing (again, the pager messages always appear when the higher power wants to communicate with Miae).

Taekwang is an interesting character because the things he says are sometimes connected to the greater theme of the story. Like when he listened to his music and said how Miae cannot choose two things at the same time (come on, it was the foreshadowing for the current conflicts!), he smelled Jisu on Miae (???), Jisu even said he's the one he cannot deal with, and now he was counting the seconds until Miae got another sign. Is he used as a medium? (who knows lol)

Miae wants to check the pager message but the fluorescent lamp(?) breaks. Jisu shields Miae from the shards while they fall on the ground, making it his first successful attempt to save Miae in the story. The pager lands in the corner of the room.

Episode 159

Miae goes to a phone booth to check her messages and it's filled with the car ads so she kicks them away

The first message is a loud noise of a song recording. I personally think if there's a higher power in the story, this message came from it. The other is about Miae's friends telling her they'll visit her at her academy which gives Miae a sense of panic knowing Yonghui and Yunhui might meet.

Miae sees an airplane in the sky and the narration says Miae has a feeling that something is interfering with her and the panels get fuzzy with flashbacks to phone calls earlier in the story (omg this is actually crazy)

It starts raining and we get a glimpse of the last countryside memory we haven't seen yet about Miae running after Cheol at night. In the present, Miae trips just as she did as a kid, but instead of Cheol she meets Tae Uk.

[whenmemorydies]

This needs to get good or go away.

Having watched all of season 3 of The Bear, Carmy's epic spiral in 1x07 The Review makes so much more sense now. Let's take a look.

Recall Sydney's Cola-Braised Short Rib & Risotto dish from 1x06 Ceres, which she asks Carm to try:

Carmy tells Syd the dish, while tremendous, is not ready to be rolled out as part of The Beef's menu:

Now at Eleven Madison Park, where Carmy was CDC before returning back to Chicago to take over The Beef, when Carmy produced a dish that his EC (Joel McHale as psychopath, Chef David Fields) didn't think was ready, he was berated and abused for it:

Carmy would then be made to THROW AWAY the food he had made:

This is because in Chef Field's kitchen, the food needs to get good or go away:

Note: This particular brand of abuse by Chef Fields almost certainly set the stage for the COLOSSAL waste of food we kept seeing in season 3 as Carmy chucked "not perfect" dish after dish into the trash. He was reverting to learned patterns of behaviour picked up under Fields at EMP in his feral pursuit of a star at The Bear.

Alright, so I think we can establish that in Carmy's experience, there's no serving food to patrons where the EC doesn't think that food is ready to go out. Even if this means huge amounts of perfectly edible and probably delicious food gets chucked in the bin.

But what does Sydney do in 1x06 with her tremendous but "not ready" dish of Cola-braised short ribs with risotto, of which she has an extra plate? She sends it out to a patron. Because Sydney Adamu Does. Not. Waste. Food! (a woman after my mother's heart):

She even tells Carmy that she didn't want to waste the food in the next episode, 1x07 The Review, when we find out (along with Sydney) that the patron she gave her dish to was a food critic who wrote a glowing review about The Beef, and made special mention of Syd's dish in particular (note: this is the same review that Syd has stuck to her fridge door in 3x10 Forever):

Now Carmy plays the review and the fact that Sydney's dish made it out of the kitchen off here. He insists "its all good" but this lasts for about a second before he drops this petty, passive-aggressive barb:

And then as most people know by now, the kitchen rapidly descends into chaos when we come to realise that Sydney accidentally left The Beef's online pre-order option open, resulting in a huge number of orders that the crew could not reasonably be expected to fill. While this is happening, Carmy begins to spiral. He starts berating Sydney:

And then we get it, the moment Carmy snaps to EMP, Chef Fields and Michelin Mode:

Of course, Sydney asks the question that we're all thinking:

Because really, the short rib and risotto dish has nothing to do with the pre-order fiasco...but Carm is in the middle of a spiral here.

He is off kilter, triggered by Sydney sending out a dish he deemed was "not ready" and a new system they've tried to implement now blowing up in their faces. When Sydney asks Carmen what her Cola-braised short rib and risotto dish has to do with the pre-order issue, Carm yells at her:

Chef, stop!

Then Sydney does her best to try and manage expo but at this point, Carmy is taking anyone speaking to him as an act of insubordination. His need to regain control is so great at this point in the episode that he blows up at Sydney in a moment that is still hard for me to watch:

As I said at the start of this post, seeing the windows into Carmy's culinary (and familial) ancestry across all 3 seasons of The Bear has contextualised Carmy's breakdown in 1x07 that much better for me. Key to this context is control and agency.

@chaoswillcalmusdown and I talked here about how important a lack of control is in driving much of Carmy's actions, particularly in the context of being locked in the walk-in at the end of season 2. I think this obviously holds for season 1 as well.

Carmy's history of trauma, particularly as the child of an addict, means that he has grown up feeling powerless and fearful in the one place where he was meant to feel safe and secure: his home.

This fear was felt by all the Berzatto kids. In 3x08 Ice Chips, Carm's sister Natalie tells their mother, Donna, that the latter scared all of her children and that this is something Natalie doesn't want for her own unborn child.

In his Al-Anon monologue in 1x08 Braciole, Carm also discloses a number of other instances where he felt powerless, including as an adolescent at school and later in his relationship with his brother Mikey:

Carm wanted desperately for a relationship with his oldest brother but the latter's addiction and mental health issues meant that Carm was kept at a distance. Mikey's death by suicide would have been another foundational trauma for Carmy: an event he could not have controlled at all but, had he been able to, would have tried to change with everything in his power in order to avoid losing the only father figure he's ever really known.

Now, add to all of this: Carmy's experience at EMP working under an Executive Chef who seems to get off on inducing a perpetual state of fear and powerlessness in his staff. We see from Carmy's flashbacks throughout the series that at EMP, he never speaks back to Chef Fields despite the latter's incessant verbal and psychological abuse. The ONLY time we see Carmen challenge Fields is when he makes the decision to sub out his EC's choice of fennel soubise for blood orange in a hamachi dish - a dish that eventually will make its way to Sydney Adamu. But even this challenge by Carmy is oblique, one that doesn't involve direct confrontation of Fields himself. In fact, as far as we know, Fields never finds out about Carm's act of insubordination.

Where folks have experienced repeated or chronic trauma like Carmy has throughout his life, a common coping mechanism is to try and assert control wherever possible. This reflex is an attempt to claw back some of the powerlessness that traumatic incidents have taken away. We've seen Carmy do this most profoundly throughout season 3. But this is also what has been happening all along in the show, including in ep 1x07.

Here at The Beef where Carm was in effect EC, his sous, Sydney, challenged him by sending out a dish he said wasn't ready. She does what he did at EMP but the difference is, here Carmy finds out about it. And then, as the kitchen descends into chaos because of the pre-order fiasco, Carmy ROARS. He doesn't stop to think about how similar Sydney is to him in their rebellions. Or that it makes sense to not waste perfectly good food. Instead, he lets the bear out of its cage in an attempt to scare everyone in his vicinity into submission. He channels the most recent mentor he's had - the one whose abuse would have literally altered Carmy's brain chemistry and behavioural instincts (because thats what trauma does to us) - in order to assert control and avoid, at all costs, that familiar feeling of powerlessness.

All of the above is not to say that Carmy's behaviour in 1x07 (or 3x03 or 3x09 etc) was acceptable. It wasn't. Carmy even recognised this in 1x08 when he apologises to Syd via text:

Later in that same episode, Carmy offers to start The Bear with Sydney: a peace offering and a commitment to their relationship.

We got none of this remorse or show of contrition from Carmy in season 3, which I think has contributed to why the most recent season of The Bear has divided audiences. But given the events of 3x10, I suspect these things are going to come from Carmy in the next season. I also note this interview with co-show runner Joanna Calo where she says (about depicting trauma and recovery on the show):

[I]f you're going to change, its probably temporary [...] or if you do actually change, it takes a while.

[...]

[c]hange is gradual and you do, you go back and forth [...] You make gains in one way but then when its actually tested in another, you realise you actually aren't fixed at all [...] and that felt like a real thing that we knew we wanted to explore.

Watching this interview after season 3 was reassuring. It contextualised a lot of Carmy's behaviour as regression, given his past trauma. This leaves room for the next season of the show to explore what happens after Carmy realises the cost of his regression - on himself and his loved ones. And hopefully we then get more steps forward than backwards in his recovery. Hopefully, we get less perfection (which itself is an attempt at control) and more joyful, loving mess.

[rocksibblingsau]

so in the au where barb is baby but everyone else are grown ups did Trash just decided to adopt/kidnapped branch when he was a kid or what happen

In that AU I think Branch heard noises so he went further away from the village and found the Rock Trolls. He was pretty scared but also really intrigued and when Thrash went up to him the first thing he said was "You look like me."

Thrash's first thought was "Baby Rock Troll" but then he realized they were close to Pop territory so he was like "Nah probably not, probably just grey- oh..."

He asked Branch about where his family was, then where the people taking care of him were, of which there are none. Thrash was like "At least let me take you back to your village, it's not safe out here." And Branch pointed out that they clearly didn't want to get caught so he'd just walk back himself.

Branch starts to but then he sees them all packing up to leave and he decides he'll just... sneak into their bus and go with them. He hides until everyone leaves and ends up in the city and he borrows some clothes/boots that were left on the bus.

Here's the thing: you'd think Rock Trolls would be bad about keeping track of their kids. They are not. Even if the parent doesn't know where their kid is, someone does, and that someone is keeping an eye out.

As you might imagine, a random kid turning up makes people talk and Thrash gets pointed Branch's way. Branch who is currently making a bed behind some boxes and metal barrels. He of course is like "Mine" (after clearing up that Branch doesn't want to go home) and he keeps Branch as his kid. Since he has no kids, he's upfront with Branch that he'll be the next heir and Branch is like "I don't even like music, I can't lead a whole other tribe" and so Thrash says he can find Branch another foster. Branch can kinda tell Thrash was pretty excited about having a kid and he stays and starts learning all the things an heir needs to know.

Instead of imitating Barb, this Branch imitates Thrash so he has wild and frizzy hair like him and the cat's eye eyeliner that Thrash has going on. He's Thrash's shadow and Thrash has to nudge him to make friends his own age.

A few years later Thrash has a celebration to officially recognize Branch as the rightful heir to the throne. Branch still feels like he doesn't deserve it, in part because he's Pop but also because he's not Thrash's actual son. Thrash explains that Rock Trolls don't believe in distinction from birth or adoption and he tells Branch that he's 100% certainly not a direct descendent of their ancestor if you count out adoption. In fact the royal family has one of the highest rates of adoption with Rock Trolls. Almost every king and queen keep the first child they foster, which often times leads to them being the oldest child and thus the heir to the throne.

This leads up to Branch becoming king about 2 years before World Tour would have taken place.

As king he's fantastic, everyone says it's like Thrash never left.

Remember what I said about kings and queens adopting their first egg?

Branch ends up with an egg in his care: an egg safely left at his door by someone who wasn't interested in being a parent. Eggs can typically be handed over to a foster family immediately, since they don't need to be monitored for their mental health, but Branch couldn't bring himself to part with it.

Thrash had once told Branch if he'd ever had a daughter, he'd name her Barbara, so that is the name Branch picked.

Branch in the Baby Barb AU is functionally more of her dad but I'm Rock Sibblings, not Rock Father and Daughter.

[bonefall]

i know u dont rework arcs untill theyre complete but im very excited to see what you do with a starless clan, theres so much exciting things happening in this arc to work with. do you have any changes you already know for sure you’ll be incorporating?

No for-sures. I don't want to make any for-sures. I have ones I'm feeling but I don't want to call ANYTHING a for-sure yet. I need to find out what the ending is, WHERE this is all going, because I have a strong philosophy in my writing that a story is like a spear;

IT'S ALL ABOUT GETTING TO THE POINT.

But we are 4/6 of the way in, so I CAN start talking about thoughts!

I'm actually leaning pretty heavily towards axing Nightheart as a POV. There's still time for the books to turn around and justify it, BUT HEAR ME OUT

(Saying AS someone who is a Nightheart Enjoyer)

So far I'm really feeling that his character would benefit from us never being inside of his head, or seeing what he's been going through. As much as I WILL stand by that I enjoyed books 1 and 2 and liked his perspectives there, I'm starting to think that it would serve the story a lot better for Sunbeam and Frostpaw to be guessing just as much as we are.

We'd get introduced to Nightheart on the journey for catmint.

Sunbeam connects with him immediately, because she's tossed on this mission while she's in the middle of a swirling tide of drama. With nothing but Clerics and a hardened Rootspring to the left and her ex-bestie (exstie) to the right, he's really her only other choice for companionship. She's chronically unable to stop problems before they get out of hand, the sort of person who becomes frozen by indecision, and then here comes this Glorious Bastard

In her eyes, he's so caring, and bold, and fun! He's the first one to jump headlong into danger, to really be interested in her problems and just let her talk, and his story is so heartbreaking! A mother who's so hard on him... and his Clan is so mean all the time, but he wants to prove to all of them that he's more than just Firestar's descendant... but he was so brave to choose his own name.................

And then, when she follows him into ThunderClan, she learns he fucking lied. She changed Clans based on SOB STORIES

When she first comes, no one knows what he's been saying behind their back. Even if they did, they don't want to start trashing Nightheart right to his new mate's face. But then he LEAVES, and Sunbeam will bring up,

"Maybe it was because you were hard on him?"

And then Sparkpelt tries to agree, just to take blame onto herself and stop all this, but Finchlight's had eNOUGH and ends up setting the record straight;

"No this is DEFINITELY another tantrum. He already ran off once before."

"NO he didn't pick his own name, he stopped the whole ceremony to complain and Bramblestar gave him a compromise"

"MEAN to him?? I had to do HIS WORK because he couldn't STAY ON THE GROUND"

"Oh he's buckling under the weight of his legacy? that must be so hard. I was cat-fifteen when i punched my first fascist and he was wearing the face of my grandpa."

"His mom aba-WHAT?? ABANDONED???? OUR MOTHER WAS EXILED AND HE STAYED HOME!!!!! WE WERE CAT-FIFTEEN!!"

With this false hope shattered, Sunbeam is thrown into a devastating situation where... her mother was right. She was tricked. And now she's stuck in this new Clan without any of her old friends, without this mate who was too-good-to-be-true, the ONE impulsive choice she's made on her own in her WHOLE LIFE turns to ashes in her mouth. She can't go back, either, because Berryheart would NEVER let her live this down.

But... it's okay.

It's a slow shock, to make a choice SO impulsive and SO self-concerned, and find a safety net below her. It's going to be okay. The trials are fair. The cats of ThunderClan interrupt and speak over each other, but, that teaches her to be more assertive. Sparkpelt and Finchlight are not the mean assholes that Nightheart built them up to be, and they'll support her no matter what she chooses to do with her possible mate.

I want Nightheart TO get better, but, in order for that to happen, he has to face, and, more importantly, ACCEPT consequences. He needs to develop the maturity to say, "I acted like a brat and didn't appreciate what I had. and I'm sorry. you don't have to forgive me."

Bottom line being, Nightheart is striking me lately as a character that works best as unpredictable, because we have NO IDEA what's truly in his head. It would be interesting for him to have a novella later, but as it stands, his POV has consistently just been a duplicate since he joined ShadowClan. We gained NOTHING from splitting the Frostpaw Journey of the newest book in half POV, and VERY little from splitting the ShadowClan one into half POV.

I might reduce the POVs to 2, just Sunbeam and Frostpaw, or change Nightheart's to Lightleap. If I NEED 3 main characters, then they should all be a consistent camera on different parts of the conflict.

Again. I do not commit to changes until the arcs are done. Nothing in BB!ASC is set yet.

But here's some other little things I'm thinking,

Bramblestar is VOTED out.

He does not step down. The little "game" he played with Nightheart to create a situation to yell at Squilf, who hasn't been his mate in a long time in BB, was the LAST straw for ThunderClan.

They had sympathy for him before that point, because of what he went through with Ashfur, but his leadership was long and controversial even before the Impostor.

And there's a really strong sentiment that IF Bramblestar had been a good leader... they would have realized he was possessed sooner. So, there are those who partially blame him for the tyranny of the Impostor.

Basically; enough is enough.

Berryheart's hate group has ACTUAL consequences. Someone gets killed; probably Antfur, who survived the last arc to die here.

More fights. This arc has been too bloodless. Already planning SEVERAL sudden, random brawls in RiverClan as tensions boil.

Heartstar is going to be MORE controversial. Not controversial enough in canon imo. I don't like how Leaf and Squilf seem like they have "hypothetical" issues with the invasion instead of being able to point at REAL ones.

riverclan didn't forget how to do the chores they've done their WHOLE lives, no. I'm going to talk about POWER VACUUMS and create ACTUAL factions that begin to coagulate in RiverClan.

if we're going to have a brainless plot about how "Well Ackshually democracy has enough problems to make us reconsider not having unaccountable, tyrannical dictators, because a vote could maybe be called over One Single Issue" then I'll talk about shit like the spoiler effect, mob mentality, and factionalism. Get the hell out of my way ERIN I'll cook

No Smoky. Society has progressed past the need for Smoky. No Smokyng Area.

Whistlepaw should to try and take care of her ALONE, not trained enough to take care of SUCH bad wounds and barely able to keep her trembling paws straight, and Frostpaw realizes that she's making her watch her own friend die.

Is this how her life is going to end? slipping away under the paws of someone she loves, for what? pride? to do what her mother told her-- trust no cat?

As she TRUSTS Whistlepaw? Trusts her SO much, that Frostpaw will force her to be the only witness to her death?

FROSTPAW CALLS THE HUMAN

...which in BB, is a team of researchers. She drags herself to them, and collapses. This is why they just HAPPENED to have the proper equipment on them; they're WILDLIFE VETS.

Not sure how I'm going to handle Frostpaw's Journey though. In BB, the Park Cats are already a foundational part of Clan Culture.

In all honesty, while I HAVE to praise the fact that the Erins have FINALLY created ONE outsider group that isn't malicious or defenseless... I don't much care for them.

sending frostpaw on a side quest to what's essentially a big DOTC reference. Look! It's that group we introduced in the last 5 chapters of our latest glorified recap! cooool.

We're just going to get nothing but fucking founders in every dream from now on. I'm SURE of it.

As a consolation prize to myself though I will be writing cool angel scenes of the absolute BEING that Riverstar has become in heaven.

Riverstar (normal cat): "Elder Bones I'm going out!"

"not dressed like THAT you're not!!!"

Riverstar (the manifestation of the river, the rain in the sky above, and the abyss below, and how through water we are all truly connected as one being): "better?"

I will probably keep the Park Cats and rework them significantly, but I'm leaning pretty heavily towards Frostpaw visiting a LOT of places. A holy pilgrimage.

ESPECIALLY one of the Tribe's three wards; the River Ward. The Tribe of Rushing Water believes (it's even in the name) that water connects all things.

So I think it would be really fitting for Frostpaw to learn from MANY perspectives, starting with this philosophy put forth by the River Ward.

And she realizes-- that's what Riverstar is, as well. As a being. He is mentoring her on this pilgrimage, while barely saying a word. She can feel him wherever she is, because he isn't JUST the God of the River.

He is connection. He is peace. He's water. Too much and you'd drown, not enough and you'd thirst.

EDIT FROM THE FUTURE: Here is the rough draft of Frostpaw's Journey

[darcytaylor]

I'm so glad I discovered your blog! It's nice to see people have similar opinions on LN. Tbh, he was the cast member I was most concerned about when I initially saw (what I consider to be) the poor writing (and editing) of P2 because he doesn't have the same body of work that the others do to point to and say, see, it's not me! I also think he's going about his career all wrong, but it doesn't seem to occur to him that he is? It's very strange, maybe he's surrounded by yes-men? I genuinely think he's one serious dramatic role away from setting up a steady career for himself, but at the same time suspect that his team is putting him forward for trash projects that ultimately won't do anything for him in the long run.

I actually think he should age up his styling/demeanor because the way he's presenting is too young. I know that the conventional wisdom in acting is to stay up for younger roles as long as possible. However, the issue is that there's a sizeable crop of older Gen Z/Zillenial actors who are killing it right now and if he's going up against them in auditions, he just isn't going to book those parts. What there is, on the other hand, is a vacuum in the 30-something bracket that he could slot into nicely (if he and his team were smart) now that the Redmayne generation has aged out. There's so much he could've done to capitalize on his current popularity, but he's descended into a glorified model. Only booking an animated film and a play with how big the show has been is... weird to say the least. It certainly isn't due to a lack of talent. No short films, even as a favor to a friend? No music videos? Hell, a smart manager would've had him at least drop an EP or do a duet with a reasonably popular singer. He doesn't have any friends who are writers/directors to make a push to get a project made for himself? He's in a position now to try something like that, but I'm not sure he knows it. It all feels like he's spinning his wheels right now.

As to the young gf, on some level, if he's not ready for certain things, I'd actually rather he not waste the time of someone his own age because that's when women start to think about major life milestones and all that sort of stuff. He clearly has some things he needs to get out of his system first. Appreciate you!

I am also very confused as to what Luke is trying to do with his career. I guess from the outside looking in, it seems like he can't get it together, or figure out what direction he wants to go in.

But I am also not in his industry and don't exactly know the ins-and-outs of how everything is done. While I can take note that it seems like he may be spiralling, or confused as to where to take his career, at the end of the day I have NO idea what he is thinking and doing behind the scenes.

His industry is also a very hard one, even when you have a name behind you. It is very competitive so I can sympathize and also wonder if he is auditioning for things but just not getting any call backs.

I also think that some of the drama that he has found himself in has probably set him back professionally behind the scenes, and I think that laying low and not causing too much of a scene may be a good thing (if he doesn't have any jobs lined up).

But then going to smaller events and keeping his name out there a little may also keep the peace for a while, not cause issues and focusing on putting his name in the good graces of professionals and industry folk.

Another thing that could be happening is that he does have some things in the works but he is not allowed to talk about them at the moment. While I don't really have too much hope for this, it could be true! Or maybe he is just happy to wait for Bridgerton season 4 and is only waiting on that to start back up again.

I don't really agree with your statement about him dating young women because age appropriate woman are thinking about milestones. Or that he would be wasting their time. I don't love the narrative that it creates. When you start any relationship you should always voice what you are looking for, your needs, your wants and what direction you see it going/want it to go, communication is key.

But I think that many women who are Luke's age can also be looking for the same thing that he is or are also trying to work through things. Just because you are a woman doesn't automatically mean you want to settle down, have a family, get married. I know lots of women Luke's age that don't want any of that right now.

Most of my friends who are having children are in their late 30s. It's not uncommon for people to start a family at that age anymore. So even if Luke decided to date someone in their late 20s, it would be age appropriate, and I'm positive that he could find one that was on the same page as him emotionally, professionally, and there wouldn't be such a power imbalance.

(also I appreciate you as well! I love a good dialogue between people. It gives different perspectives and even if I don't agree with certain things, doesn't mean I don't want to hear what others think! So thank you for taking the time to read my thoughts, and joining in on the conversation)

[hopeymchope]

The Legend of Zelda and shipping

I can't understand people who are like "I only ship Link in every game with one single character ever." What the hell... HOW?!

This seems to be most most common with people who ship Zelda/Link or "Zelink" — always wanting every Zelda to be with Link, because they're the main characters, though the phenomenon does exist with Malink and some other ships as well. And that’s not to hate on Zelink and Malink, because I love them! SPECIFIC INCARNATIONS of them, I mean.

Because there are a bare minimum of EIGHT different incarnations of Link, and you can’t tell me you think every single dude named Link has chemistry with/should have romance with every single girl named Zelda. Like EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.? I just can't with that. It's unfathomable, IMO.

I mean, OKAY, let me back that up: I get that people find it romantic to think that these are like... some kind of soulmates who always find each other through every reincarnation ala Hawkman and Hawkgirl or something, but it's not like they even display the same personality traits or share memories or something in each version of themselves. They just... act like totally different people quite regularly. Because by all accounts, they are.

Furthermore... shit - if we assume the incarnations are all descendants of one another and the same descendancy lines keep hooking up with the same partner lines, at what point do we wind up becoming dangerously incestuous with this repeated pairing? Because that shit seems INEVITABLE in such a case…?

NAH, my fam — I believe each Link and each Zelda are their own person, with their own traits. Their only unifying truth is that every person Link will ALWAYS look best in a green tunic and matching green, pointy flop-hat. (Sorry; I don't make the rules. Facts is facts.)

With that in mind, these are my sundry ships for various Links. And I apologize in advance for the fact that they're all boringly het. :P

Skyward Sword — Zelink, absolutely. Childhood Friend Romance always gets me right in the heart. I love these two together. The casual playfulness and fondness they display. The lengths they'll go to in order to see each other/protect each other. And although Zelda loses some of her distinct personality when she learns she's a reincarnation of Hylia, she gets her groove back near the end, so it's all good.

Ocarina of Time/Majora's Mask/SC2 — Malink with a bullet. The singing farmgirl and the boy without a fairy, two people who felt alone in the world and find each other. The nicknames! "Don't be long, fairy boy." The fact that you can declare your romantic intentions for Malon while you're still a fucking KID! The Gossip Stone that tells you how much Malon pines to be saved from her daily life by a hero on a horse! It's SO GOOD.

Wind Waker/Phantom Hourglass — I'm only mentioning this era because this Link is an ACTUAL CHILD. He's like, what? EIGHT? Maybe ten, if we're feeling generous? So I just want to say: Yeah... I just can't bring myself to ship this literal child with anybody. It ain't RIGHT.

Link's Awakening — Marink. If you weren't feeling these two by the time their sunset beach conversation wrapped up, I don't know what to even say to you. This was probably my first serious ship from playing the TLoZ games. Plus this ship is a good reason why the original black-and-white Game Boy version's secret ending is actually the best version of that bonus scene.

Twilight Princess — Ilink. Is there even any other contender worth mentioning? The writing and direction of the cut scenes makes it pretty clear that Link and Ilia are sweet on each other. You barely even meet Zelda in this game, and the only other option would probably be, well... Midna? You know - your partner imp that spends most of the game trash-talking you for her personal lulz and repeatedly slamming her body weight down HARD onto your spine? Mm, I’ll pass.

Breath of the Wild/Age of Calamity/TotK — Miphlink/Miphalink, no items, FINAL DESTINATION. Their story makes my heart just ACHE. The flashback to Mipha healing him up... Mipha's diary (OMFG that diary)... the Zora armor and its descriptions... holy SHIT, fam. And even if that story DIDN'T melt me into a complete puddle, Zelda put herself out of consideration by stealing my fucking house. I don’t understand why she pulled that, but given her privileged upbringing, I doubt she understands the value/expense of home ownership. So maybe she thought this was like yoinking a french fry. :P

Haven't Played — The only major entry I haven't played yet is "Spirit Tracks" on the DS. So I can't speak to that incarnation at this point. But the two things I can say is A) The Zelda/Link relationship sure appears cute? but B) This is also the same style of Link seen in Wind Waker, so I won't be surprised if she's supposed to be a LITERAL CHILD again (and therefore not a shippable character for me).

[teecupangel]

was reading through your claudes tag and came across this tag "at this point we’re only missing petruccio and we will have all the auditore siblings x desmond headcanons XD" and it made me think of an au where desmond is reborn around the same time as petruccio is born so they become childhood friends after they hit it off after tthye "coincidentally" meet on one of petruccio's rare days out

so they grow up together with desmond feeling guilty about using petruccio to get closer to petruccio's family not realizing that he's started thinking of them as petruccio's family instead of ezio's and that his motivation has shifted to saving petruccio instead of sparing ezio the pain of seeing his family die

meanwhile petruccio has a puppy crush on desmond forever because desmond while protective of him doesn't coddle him like his family does and also being very understanding about changing plans because of petruccio's disability like "oh we had planned to play outside today but now you're not feeling up to it that's cool lets go play cards, or read together, or play whatever board games existed in renaissance italy"

side tangent had the thought of desmond apprenticing to a woodcarver so that he could learn how to make some of the few board games he can remember from the future to play with petruccio

also i feel like demond would have to have petruccio's crush pointed out to him a la white aster before he has his oh oh moment probably by one of petruccio's siblings letting something slip by accident

The post from the #claudes tag where I did write in the tags that we’re only missing Petruccio from the Auditore family.

With this ask, Desmond now have the complete set XD

Okay, let’s talk about this childhood friends-to-lover setup for Petruccio and Desmond!

Why not just make Desmond be reborn as the son of a carpenter? That would give Desmond easy access to what can be considered as ‘trash’ and he could just start trying to carve it because he keeps on talking about board games he remembered playing and Petruccio always looked interested in playing them but then Desmond would remember that they wouldn’t be invented until later on.

We can even make Desmond’s father a descendant of the Vikings so he could teach Desmond how to carve out his first Orlog set so Desmond would have something to practice on.

From there, Desmond could start bringing his own board games to play with Petruccio.

So in this scenario, Desmond would have played lots of board games. Maybe one of his coworkers in Bad Weather liked board games and would invite his coworkers to play during the weekend or something and Desmond enjoyed it because it felt like he was connecting with people without lying about who he was.

In this situation, I think it would be funny if Desmond making board games he remember to play with Petruccio would lead to Leonardo discovering him as a genius ‘game maker’.

How?

Because a lot of the board games Desmond remembered needed more than two players (although Petruccio does love Patchwork and they play that a lot) so the other Auditore siblings (and sometimes their parents) get roped in to play with them as well.

The Auditores are competitive kids and even Petruccio shows his fangs during this time (even if the main reason why Petruccio is being competitive is because he doesn’t want to lose in front of Desmond and, really, the three try their best to support their youngest brother's puppy love but their thirst for victory superseded any familial love they feel for one another).

So Leonardo gets roped in to the weekly (biweekly? Triweekly?) board game night and he sees all of the many board games Desmond had made and he starts to interview him about them and Desmond tries to answer all of them, admitting that a lot of the board games are actually versions 2 or 3 because he had to tweak the game balance (since he didn’t remember all the rules) a lot of times which embarrasses him. This only makes Leonardo think highly of him because admitting that it’s not perfect meant that Desmond strives to keep upgrading his work.

Leonardo’s sudden interest in Desmond makes Petruccio jealous though and he already had to be make peace with how Desmond seem to be ‘like’ Ezio (in Desmond’s defense… he’s bias to Ezio thanks to his life as Desmond Miles).

But he can’t do anything because Leonardo is a friend of the family and a loyal friend for that matter and…

Well…

Leonardo was also trying to help Petruccio try to get Desmond’s attention.

It all comes to a boil when in one of the more stressful board games (I’m thinking maybe Nemesis or maybe even Werewolves/Blood on the Clocktower), someone (probably Claudia?) calls out Petruccio’s actions as less of him playing to win but playing to make sure Desmond wins and that’s cheating because he can’t let his love for Desmond be the reason why he’s willing to lose the game and drag everybody with him.

And everyone just grows quiet…

And Petruccio runs away.

While Desmond’s just sitting there, having his own “Oh my god, he loves me! Why didn’t I see that? Oh Jesus Christ, I’m so dumb! Why didn’t I notice it???” and “Do I… Do I love Petruccio??? Have I fallen for him without realizing it???” breakdown on the inside while he just looked at the board game blankly.

This would happen when Desmond and Petruccio reached like maybe 18 or 19 (so yeah, no Auditore execution event because Desmond had been busy).

Leonardo would actually be the one to talk to Desmond and he would talk about how the real reason why he fell in love with Desmond’s board games (which they’re working on selling soon) was because it was made with love.

Each carving done by the same pair of hands each time…

Each stories engraved in the board…

Each rules to ensure fairness…

Desmond wasn’t just making them for fun.

They had always been a labor of love.

But the question then becomes…

Who was Desmond thinking of when he was making all of these board games?

And Desmond just stares at Leonardo before he goes, “Thank you.”

Leonardo just smiles back as he asks, “I’m not the one who needs to hear the truth about these board games now, am I, Desmond?”

“Yeah…” Desmond stands as he agrees, “I should… I need to talk to Petruccio.”

Leonardo nods and watches as Desmond rushes back to Palazzo Auditore.

Ah… young love…

[tomorrowsdrama]

I just finished Re-reading The Dreamer in the Spring Boudoir and omg it’s just amazing the second time around. Technically, this would be my first time reading it completely. The first time I read it, I got distracted at around the 90% mark and didn’t finish.

But omg I love this web novel so much. The characters are so flawed and complex and human! Trash Man aka Ning Yuxuan probably had the best character arc out of all the characters. I loved hating him in the beginning when he truly was a trash man. And then I gleefully laughed when Ji Man threw him for a loop and didn’t make life easy for him. Then I relished in his suffering as he had to grovel and work his ass off to try to win Ji Man’s heart only to fail. After that, I felt bad for him as he desperately tried to get Ji Man to open up her heart a bit. Then that turned to rooting for him to get the girl and also wanting to shake some sense into Ji Man. And finally, I swooned and awwed seeing the lengths he went to to protect Ji Man and give her a peaceful life. If you’re going to get swept up in a fight for the throne and dangerous political intrigue, Trash Man is definitely the person you want to be with!

The level of scheming and many layers of planning this man did was truly frightening albeit highly effective.

This line especially stuck out to me:

““Right now, was this considered a meeting of villains that were colluding together?”

Because viewed from a different perspective, Trash Man and Ji Man could definitely be the antagonists in another story bahahaha. I loved that Trash Man had once considered taking the throne for himself but only turned down the idea because of some weird clan rule that said his clan’s descendants could never ascend to the throne. He certainly could have usurped the throne several times easily.

And Ji Man! What a great main character. Just like Trash Man, she is frighteningly competent and not someone you want to mess with. I like that she doesn’t go after people unless they harmed her first. Oh boy does she hold a grudge and will do anything to get her revenge. What’s great about her is that she’s not omnipotent and gets into trouble/makes mistakes/misreads situations. She has a bit of an advantage since she knows some of the story’s plot and has her knowledge from modern times, but that isn’t always enough to keep her safe or out of trouble. That’s so refreshing to see in a transmigrator story!

And the side characters! I don’t know how this author did it but they got me to care about the side characters. I even teared up while reading the death scene of the second prince and his wife Pengyue. This author really has a way with words because I could totally imagine how the second prince looked and sounded as he dragged his body over to his wife’s bed, not realizing that she’s already dead. And the whole time he’s “berating” her for seemingly betraying him, he’s also making excuses for her and already talking about how she’ll have to make it to him. We didn’t get too many details about their relationship, but the author easily conveyed how much he loved Pengyue in just that one scene. I would totally read a story or watch a drama just about those two.

I was invested throughout the entire novel even though it’s super long at over 500 chapters. It’s THAT good. That’s why it pains me to think about that abomination of an adaptation. I haven’t seen it, but just by the trailers alone, I could tell it would not do the story justice. There are too many plot lines in this story that would not pass censorship. I mean, Ning Yuxuan was responsible for raising up and then dethroning three different emperors one after the other. No way would the censors have allowed that. But even if we were to put that aside, there’s just too much stuff to fit into 38 episodes.

Anyway, read it, loved it, would absolutely recommend it you’re into transmigrator stories. Now I’m off to read the bonus chapters.

[psychiclounge]

also for anyone who Does want to know what my favorites off that list are & some of my thoughts on them

to start, the big obvious Properly Good ones are fables of the penitent thief, the sun within and the sun without, and upside down. everyone should play these. i love them dearly

& going alphabetically speaking about the ones i have the most thoughts on:

thief: brainchild had me like... weirdly enraptured for how bare bones and empty it is. it's basically just a big keyhunt, but it creates this crazy rat in a maze "this place hates you" feeling that i haven't seen many more polished fms go for- which is a good thing, because it'd immediately go from intriguing to infuriating if you had any objectives other than escaping. no handholding whatsoever, no explanation of what this Facility is, areas of pitch black, entirely metal textures, genuinely labyrinthine architecture, weird jumps, spots where you can get yourself stuck and killed. i kinda can't help but love it. i think the misaligned textures add to the overall unnatural feeling that i like

fables of the penitent thief is a classic. what can i even say about it. it's like a goofy picture book about a thief returning all the items he stole from the king and then fighting an evil ghost. it's so sweet. you'll love it. the currency is whole apples.

ganbatte thief-san has katamari music. you gotta just see what's up with this one.

i played the harlequin very early into when i was first getting into fms and i just have a soft spot for it. "playing" all the little carnival games at the beginning, and then a fun dark ride, yayyyyy

kill factory 1 is cute. the demo for kill factory 3: strain 7 has some of the most interesting and smoothly implemented custom items/weapons i've seen in an fm. KILL FACTORY 2: ESCAPE FROM THE PLANET OF THE ROBOTS FUCKING RULES, PLAY IT NOWWWW

melancholy in porto & umbelina are two of cardia's fms that contain no enemies and are focused on just portraying real places from his life, which is something i always find extremely charming in a fan level for any game. umbelina even has photos of the real apartments and items that the two levels were based on in the files. they're not the most fun things on earth to play, melancholy in porto especially turns into scouring every corner of every room for loot items, which with how big these levels are gets boring fast. play it on normal, only the loot goal changes.

i have spoken at length about my feelings on one man's trash on this blog already LMAO the humor is. whatever for me but i'm just fascinated with this vision for a more modern version of the city, all the little details... i always get a kick out of real licensed music in fms, too. there's like... bjork in here. hanover aldercash is very quickly becoming a name that i'm excited to see in the fm scene also, especially considering his involvement in reuploading all those object repository models

ten little taffers is extremely charming, the three different difficulty levels having you play different characters, all the guests dying off over time, the way loot items start to disappear around the map when you're playing on the non-garrett difficulties... it's just a delight. i think on one of the non-garrett difficulties, you bump into garrett at the end, and i remember him being the biggest pain in the ass to run away from/fight. he kicked my ass so hard

the sun within and the sun without i have also spoken about, but i've tried to avoid talking about the exact reason i put it on this list: there's a second, secret fm that you access through a password-protected zip file packaged with the main fm. you do find the password in the fm. also the main level has one of the most frustrating movement challenges i've ever had to do to get a secret loot item. that fucking mushroom on the edge of the asteroid

upside down has a similar charm to ten little taffers' non-garrett levels: you're a guard making your rounds when a group of thieves descend on the manor, and it's your job to take them all down. windows shattering as you run around, getting flashbombed, valuables disappearing from around the mansion, thieves darting into secret passages to run away from you... it's so wonderful, you gotta play it

[hell-drabbles]

(tbh, I don't even have the angel cards cuz I'm broke lol🙃, but I'll tell a few thing's what I noticed on other people's post about them either the comics, message's, or stories and theories)

Let's start with Rafael, the dude is like that one insecure kid in the family that always get compared to their other siblings or cousins, Gabriel is the messenger, Michael is the right hand, Rafael wanted to be acknowledged as something, he sees god as kind and benevolent being and being too merciful so he wanted to be the one who punishes evil for him because he loves god and wanted to understand him in some degree, so he judges based on his beliefs wether they're innocent or not and just like other Angel's, his views are always on god and wouldn't acknowledge the God's other creations because he sees them unworthy of God's recognition, bro is already insane (and God didn't even reprimanded this type behavior idk) and had spiraled further since God disappear when peepaw Solomon died, so ever since then he sees all of his decisions and other forms of punishment as a will for/from God in hopes he will come back one day and see his work.

So, the Christmas event happened and most of us know about the chastity belts they wear as to keep them pure for god, and out all of the three seraphim, Rafael is the only one that had his successfully and actually taken off by Raon (that's what they say) and by the time our little rara came back to heaven, bro had his post nut happiness because no joke that the brother actually thought he had ascended into a higher rank than Michael and Gabriel after he experience his first nut (since Lucifer said that Angel's engaged in ecstasies and eventually stop before they climax) Rafael was in a good mood back in heaven during those days that he scared most of the other Angel's.

(that's all bro, I'm new to your blog and love your raon trash talks, sorry English is not my native language btw, you also get a follow, I'll still go a couple of research for the other seraphim)

[ and also After reading a couple of your Lucifer x Companion works I'm hooked, Raon is so rotten to the point I think he wouldn't stop even if ever one day Companion gets married to Lucifer and Raon would just insist that its for the betterment of hell lol bye]

Funny you should send me Raphael of all angels, I was actually starting to write about him. So that's how he's like huh? That's funny. I am going around and reading what I can find about him, especially his card lines because I get the strongest grasp of a character by the way they're talking. And wow, he's a delusional one, ain't he? Also, I take an interest in his relationship with Heaven, since it's pretty clear he has no love for the others that live there, and if need be, will burn that place to the ground if it aligns with his views on God. What a weirdo.

Haaa, my brain has been stuck on how the seraphim would take in interest in the Embittered Companion, and how that would descend into some good old obsession. I know for certain that they didn't take any interest in the Embittered Companion. It's only after spending time in Heaven do things start to descend. Of course, I naturally want each of their obsessions to be distinct from one another. Like, how I imagine Gabriel to take issue with anyone who keeps a feather of the Embittered Companion to themselves, regardless if they were demon or angel. And Raphael, he has a weird sense of when the Embittered Companion is about to become lucid, so he tends to be there and just, stares. And sometimes laughs for seemingly no reason. He's creeeeepy.

Michael, eh, I don't have anything on him right now. Maybe later.

And yes, yes, Ra-on is certainly a rotten little thing, because holy hell man, incel behavior is no joke and that shit is extremely hard to weed out of a person. So, Ra-on is going to be a frustrating character to deal with, but he'll get better eventually. It's just going to be a rather painful process because of how much he's gotta unpack. Thank you for liking it all!

[cazort]

I hate when I randomly see a TERF post on my dash and I'm like who even is this, I don't recognize their username...why do I even follow this person? And they don't even follow me. I'm selective about who I follow and most of the people I follow follow me back and those who don't are mostly either side-blogs of mutuals, or people I chat with and know.

Does Tumblr make it easy to accidentally follow people and I slipped and clicked the wrong button at some point? Or did one of my old mutuals randomly descend into the TERF ideology and quietly unfollow me, perhaps also changing their username to something I don't recognize?

TERF posts and blogs are so irritating to me because they often start reasonable, talking about real issues I care about like misogyny and sexual assault and relationship abuse, sometimes homophobia directed at wlw, but then they gradually descend into man-hating, which of course sneaks in in subtle forms, and then that man-hating spills over into hating all AMAB people and special intense levels of hate are reserved for hating transfem people and then transmasc people also get a unique special type of hate too.

And it's just so nauseating. I'm like gag me with a spoon, I'm not only unfollowing I'm blocking, I was so done with this ideology 20 years ago, now I don't even try reasoning with people who post this trash. Like you go have your dumpster fire over there on the other side of the parking lot and behind the building, thank you ma'am. I'm going to enjoy my Chinese takeout here on this bench under a nice tree, far enough away that I can't smell the stench.

I can't express how much joy it brings me to have this stuff completely out of my life. I love being surrounded by people who care about all people, including transfem, transmasc, GNC people, nonbinary people, women, cis men even. I love it. I love all people and I love being surrounded by positive people who think rationally and love people and focus on breaking down systems, while lifting up people.

[escarietson]

Judgement Day 2024

Today is Judgement Day 2024, Election Day.

The day in where either we, the United States of America will descend into a dictatorship or live on as a democracy. And the closing messages from Donald Trump and Kamala Harris were crystal clear...!

It's long past time to take out the trash that is Donald Trump and the MAGA Republican Party, to take them all out to the dump where they belong for their actions against Americans and women. To force them all out of our lives and our bedrooms whether they like it or not, to flip the patriotic bird at their vile desires of regression and dystopia. The day in where we can and must turn the page on this horrific chapter in our lives and close the book on this vile mark in our history in order to move on to the greater good for all, not just ourselves. Today, we make our final push to rid ourselves of the unforgivable plague that Trump and his rich allies forced upon us, which has persisted for over 8 years even after Trump rightfully got the boot he deserved in 2020 for his disgraceful failures.

As an American patriot who supports and upholds the constitution I make my final pitch today about this topic that has sapped my spirits and soul: Vote for Kamala Harris so we can finally heal from the unforgivable scars that Trump and the GOP left on us. This is not only for our own sake but also for the rest of the world that relies on us, such as Ukraine given their war against Russia, who is being assisted by North Korea. Should Trump win not only we suffer but also everyone else in the world under his selfish & hateful wrath that'll further empowered the ruthless autocrats and dictators of the world that will ensure the end of democracy and freedom for the entire world.

Though there is a lot of evidence that Trump may lose given how his crowds have been dwindling and his rallies have been getting emptier and emptier...

... and also Trump himself has been pulling a lot of crappy PR stunts that blew up in his face. Such as posing as a McDonald's employee and posing as a garbage man...

... we still cannot be complacent in this at all given whats at state given Project 2025, the USA version of Germany's Project 1933 via Adolf Hitler.

I know politics is annoying and not a proper topic to talk about, but the dangers we face cannot be overstated or ignored given how everyone will be affected this time; the men, the women, the blacks, the Latinos, the immigrants (legal or illegal), the poor & middle class, and the LGBTQ+. Everyone is affected and also at risk this year given what the far-right has planned and how they see things outside of the common man.

Should Trump and the far-right win, it's all over for everyone that isn't rich, religious, national, or a white man. Not just internally but also everyone else in the world that isn't them. Political opponents and those who stood against them in some way or form will be rendered targets for arrests or execution. If the right wins there won't be any checks & balances anymore, no guardrails, no oppositions, nothing. People like me will be hunted down and either incarcerated or executed via firing squads given that Trump insisted such desires onto Liz Cheney, the moderate republican who opposed him and proudly served in the Jan 6 Select Committee who put country over party.

Because Trump desires uncheck power and total authority over everyone and everything in service to himself, everyone's lives are in jeopardy and at the mercy of a mentally defective old man's thin-skinned ego.

As of today unless the election is called for Kamala and the democrats this could be my last days on this planet as a free man, let alone alive and well. All because I rightfully stood against the epitome of what our founding fathers had long since opposed; a king, a madman, a ruthless dictator, a petty tyrant.

Should Trump win and gain unchecked power... It was an honor to vote while I still had the chance and life in America was swell until my demise comes at the hands of a petty tyrant or his loyalists who desires my death all because I did not bend my knee to him and didn't kiss his ring. Though I am confident & optimistic that Harris will win and secure the presidency along with the democrats regaining control of all branches of government in order to clean up Trump and the Republicans messes I have to brace myself for the worst despite my confidence.

As of now at this point I can only hope for the best...

Against all the evil that republicans can conjure, all the wickedness that conservatives can produce. We'll send unto them, only you. Vote and turnout, until it is done...!

[myinky-cloak]

13 Books

What’s up readers?! How about a little show and tell? Answer these 13 questions, tag 13 lucky readers and if you’re feeling extra bookish add a shelfie! Let’s Go!

Not tagged by @softest-punk but I saw it on their page and decided to get involved.

1) The Last book I read:

Just finished Tana French’s “Broken Harbour”. I LOVE Tana French, particularly her Dublin Murder Squad series. I wasn’t very satisfied with the ending. It required too much suspended disbelief for me. Too many characters descending into madness at the same time very conveniently. But it was interesting to consider how many issues we cause for ourselves by attempting to be someone we think we should be.    

2) A book I recommend:

Not to be basic Tumblr bitch but Neil Gaiman’s “The Ocean at The End of The Lane”. The way he can articulate the terrible things that happen in childhood, how we deal with them, how we carry the memories, and the effect they have on us for the rest of our lives left me shaken and breathless. ”You don’t pass or fail at being a person, dear.” I wish I didn’t need this reminder but I do, so thank you, Neil.

Plus, I find it fascinating to see the difference between people who can intimately relate to it and those for whom it is just a story.

3) A book that I couldn’t put down:

Stephen King “The Waste Lands” The third book of The Dark Tower series. A book series that started out so promising and ended with me throwing the final book against the wall in disgust and cursing Mr. King to high heavens. For all the issues the final books in the series had “The Waste Lands” was an absolute masterpiece. I remember reading it on a train to work and nearly missing my spot because I needed to find out what happens next.   

4) A book I’ve read twice (or more):

One book?? Right. Stephen King’s “Salem’s Lot”. It absolutely terrified me when I read it as a teenager. I loved the feeling of small town America invaded by the supernatural which he writes so well. Plus, vampires!  I have a habit of re-reading it every time I go home, don’t really know why. I probably should get around to reading it in English at some point. 

Sometimes I re-read books by accident. I consume so much crime fiction that occasionally I will pick up a book from the library and happily read it with no recollection of the plot only to be told by GoodReads I’ve read it years ago.

5) A book on my TBR:

I am beginning to think this list was made by someone who isn’t a reader. One book? I guess it has to be R.F.Kuang “Babel”. I really want to read it. It's like The Secret History but in Oxford! I know I will enjoy it but I only have it on Kindle. I prefer reading long books in their physical form but the library copy is in hardback so it’s cumbersome to carry around. Thus it stays on my TBR.

First world problems of a bookworm.

6) A book I’ve put down:

Dan Brown “Angels and Demons”. I knew about his reputation when I picked it up, but I wanted something mindless to read and thought it would be fine. Reader, it wasn’t fine. Terrible, terrible writing. I couldn’t deal. Turns out I do have standards even for my trash reads.

7) A book on my wish list:

Stephanie Foo “What My Bones Know: A memoir of healing from complex trauma” I’ve read so many books on trauma and complex trauma both for my degree and for personal understanding. Surprising no one most of them are written by men. I’m very excited to read female perspective on it, plus she talks about generational trauma which is such an incredibly fascinating topic. 

8) A favorite book from childhood:

Alexander Dumas “The Three Musketeers”. I was obsessed with this book. OBSESSED. I’ve read it so many times I could recite pages of it. It introduced me to my first problematic fictional crush Athos, starting my love affair with all the sad tortured blorbos which going strong till this day. I named my dog Count de la Fere after him. I wanted to be a musketeer so bad. Still kind of do.  

9) A book you would give to a friend:

It does slightly depend on a friend but Amor Towles “A Gentleman in Moscow”. I was so blown away when I read it. I gave copies to my friends. I talked to everyone about it: friends, people on the internet, strangers in bookshops or on public transport (In London! Imagine the horror!) One of my friends refuses to read the last chapter till this day because she does not want the story to end. This is probably my proudest book gifting achievement.  

10) A book of poetry or lyrics that you own

The OG problematic bae Lord Byron Selected Works. It’s a second hand school library's copy from 1950’s full of underlinings and scribbled notes. I love seeing evidence of other people engaging with writing and thinking about words. 

Such a problematic person. Such a great poet. 

11) A nonfiction book you own:

Cindy Crab “Things That Help: Healing our lives through Feminism, Anarchism, Punk & Adventure”. I found this book in the feminist bookshop in Brighton when things weren’t going so great for me for the umptheen time and it was like pouring healing salve on my soul. It’s not a book in a traditional sense but a collection of self-published zines collected into a little tome. It destroyed my very conservative idea of what a book is and how “professional” it should look that I did not realise I held until that moment. Most importantly, it reminded me there are other ways of being in the world that a conventional way of living.    

12) What are you currently reading:

Teo van den Broeke “The Closet”. It’s a memoir of a fashion journalist who tells of growing up, coming out and figuring out himself through clothes that were important to him. It’s written in an easy, conversational style. As someone whose wardrobe consists of jeans, leggings and t-shirts I find it so interesting to peek into fashionista’s world.   

13) What are you planning on reading next?

Isabella Hammad “Enter Ghost”. It is a book set in Palestine about staging Hamlet and possibly also a queer love story. What more could you want from a book? Cannot wait to start this one!! 

[fantasyinvader]

I feel like Byleth becoming the Bodhisattva is a good arc for his character. They start off as the Ashen Demon, a mercenary who kills without emotion, but over the course of the game become more of an all-loving hero (see Kamen Rider Ghost for another example of a MC being a Bodhisattva-type). They become more confident as well, earning their spot as a leader of Fodlan. This is in direct contrast to Flower, where Byleth follows the animal path Edelgard set out for them, becomes distant once again as they mow down everyone in Edelgard’s way because they believe something different (according to the game’s creators),  don’t become a leader and instead follow whatever their spouse does post-war. They let their attachment to Edelgard blind them, their understanding of the world is one of delusion, and taking out everything Edelgard hates.

Not the path of good karma.

But, if we look at the Bodhisattva thing… Just think about it. Edelgard lies and tries to manipulate Byleth, turning them into her pawn. FEH even backs this up, yet we’re not supposed to hate Edelgard. Edelgard contributes to Flayn’s kidnapping, which leads to the experiments in Remire and people literally being turned into monsters yet we’re not supposed to hate her. She basically wants to do whatever the fuck she wants and will order the deaths of anyone who tries to oppose her, be they Byleth or her former classmates, yet we’re not supposed to hate her. Edelgard starves her citizens, conscripts them to fight in a war they don’t believe in so that she can enact reforms that “coddle” the nobility and oppress the masses, all while trashing the Empire’s economy and feeding her people misinformation (even including propping up her own Church), yet we’re not supposed to hate her even as she says her goal is simply conquest and elimination of all who would oppose her.

I’m reminded of a scene from Beast Wars, where BW!Megatron kills OG!Optimus (he gets better). He talks about how the Decepticons lost the Great War, were ruled over by the Autobots and their descendants the Maximals. He makes the whole thing out to be him fighting for his people, but then at the end he talks about how Cybertron is his to rule and later how evil triumphed.

If we’re not supposed to hate Edelgard, what are we supposed to feel? Pity? Pity for someone so toxic, who turns their head away from anything that contradicts their delusions? Whose rule is backed by violence, and will try to kill someone for offering her mercy? Someone willing to sacrifice as many people as it takes until she gets what she wants and get rid of what she hates?

I’m sorry, but it’s hard to see Edelgard as anything other than a villain from a Saturday morning cartoon. If Byleth is supposed to grow into a humble, all loving hero who was willing to forgive Edelgard’s transgressions if she would have repented, fine. He’s just like Kamen Rider Ghost then, who does try to forgive his father’s murderer.

And if I’m not supposed to hate her, than all I can do is pity her. But that means I’m pitying someone who is willingly ignorant, whose ambitions lay waste to the continent and who was crafted into a weapon against her tormentors hated enemies. Someone who is following the animal path, acting on impulse and instinct according to the symbolism, preying on others. Someone willing to turn herself into a monster for her twisted views on what it means to be human.

Yet despite all this, she needs to be stopped.

(Kinda makes me want to go back and rewatch Beast Machines and see if it was just bullshit mysticism or there was actually something to it beyond "extremism on any side is bad")

[blackink-onpaper]

The Descend and the Resurface

Damian Hart (Beyblade) x OC

Summary: OC comes from a complex background, and in the midst of trying to save it all and help her family she enters a strange arrangement, which will change her life forever.

Masterlist 🖤

Tags: Beyblade, Beyblade Metal Masters, Julian Konzern, Jack, Damian, OC, Gingka Hagane, team Starbreaker, team Excalibur, dr. Ziggurat, Hades Inc.

A/N: Hope you enjoy!

Also, please let me know what you think so far! It means a lot to me!

Chapter 5

Bewildered, I ripped the entire envelope apart and opened the letter:

Dear Miss Casilarghi,

You are hereby personally invited to come to Hades Inc. headquarters tomorrow at noon for a meeting with dr. Ziggurat.

This invitation also extends to a pick up at 11:30AM and return to your hotel with our chauffeur, a guided tour of the entire Hades complex and a complimentary lunch. We are looking forward to your arrival.

Best regards,

Dr. Ziggurat

CEO of Hades Inc. and Hades Academy

“Oh like fuck I will” I threw the letter into the trash: “I wasn’t even asked, they just let me know I am supposed to come! Hah, ridiculous” slowly sitting down on the bed again and running my hands through my hair, my thoughts continued: “Hades…” could it have anything to do with Kerbecs? With Starbreaker? A quick Google search later, I learned that Starbreaker is managed by this dr. Ziggurat, and that this academy is where they train their bladers. I also came across many articles about how Starbreaker members are the only three members of the Academy that were ever publicly acknowledged as graduates of the program. Apparently, many people apply and get accepted, but the majority get sent home eventually. One article even said all accepted candidates of the program need to sign iron-clad NDAs, but this was from a blog so I took it with a grain of salt. I was in a conflicted position: on one hand, I didn’t want to waste my time, which was meant to be dedicated to reconciling with Julian, on the guy who managed those lunatics from Starbreaker, but I also couldn’t help but wonder what he wants to talk about with me? This was all very suspicious, yet thought provoking. Drawing myself a warm bath to rest in, I decided to indulge dr. Ziggurat and see what he wants. After all, if I will want to leave I can. After this, I will get in contact with Julian and see if he recovered enough to speak with me.

For the meeting, I decided not to dress too formally. Even though I decided to indulge dr. Ziggurat with this meeting, I don’t plan on honouring him or his organisation by wearing my nice clothes. Therefore, I settled on a pair of ankle-length straight white jeans, and a black viscose tank top with a square neckline and thick straps, accessorised with a regular black shoulder bag and white sneakers. At 11:30 sharp, the chauffeur was in front of the hotel, holding the rear door of a big, black jeep open for me. The driver himself was dressed all in black, and was wearing black leather gloves and sunglasses. He greeted me with a polite, noticably trained smile as I settled into the vehicle. The seats were comfortable and soft, but the tainted side windows made me feel uneasy. The drive itself was not long, but it occurred to me that the reason why they sent a driver in the first place was because they want absolute control over who comes in, and who goes out. The Hades complex was in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by nothing but dust and empty land. A circle of tall buildings built of sun-reflecting glass surfaces, which gave the city a kind of glow from a distance, surrounded a single skyscraper. Upon entering the city, I noticed that there was no one in the streets, maybe an odd man here and there. The driver pulled up in front of the tallest skyscraper, and another suited man opened the door for me.

“Welcome to Hades Inc.” A short, blonde woman greeted me with a neutral but pleasant voice. She accompanied me to the elevator, where she placed one of the highest floors.

“How come there is no one in the streets?”

She smiled mildly at me: “people are working! This is a company more than anything. Besides, this time of the day it gets too warm, and the solar panels work better if there are no disturbances.”

“But where are the employees’ cars then?”

“There are several levels of underground facilities in this complex, the first one featuring a garage” she spoke just a bit more lively than Siri or Alexa, but in a very similar manner. When the door opened, there was another frosted glass wall in front of us, the door of which required a finger print for enterance. Apparently, the glass wall was sound-proof, because when she let me in I could hear two men discussing something:

“Sir, your 12PM appointment is here.” the woman let me in and closed the door softly behind me.

Dr. Ziggurat sat straight across from me, seated behind a minimalistic black desk, with two chairs in front of it, and surrounded by light gray walls and carpet. There was a lot of natural light coming into the room through floor-to-ceiling windows, yet the room was at a comfortamble temperature.

Dr. Ziggurat got up from his seat, and walked over with a grin. When he stood up, I noticed he was much taller and skinnier than I expected. He extended his hand: “Camila, so nice of you to come!” He showed me to one of the seats in front of him. On the left side of the room was a two-seat black leather sofa supported by a silver metal rod, and a man with a short beard and thin glasses sat there.

“I am dr. Ziggurat, the owner of Hades Inc., and this is my colleague, dr. Carlisle. If it is not a problem, he would like to stay for this meeting.”

“You have a lovely complex, dr. Ziggurat” I employed a bit of charm my mother taught me: “I am really impressed by the design and upkeep of the entire facility.”

“We do try our best” Ziggurat smiled, before leaning back and looking at his tablet: “So Camila, I see here you speak 4 languages?”

I was just about to engage in this small talk, when I decided my time was more valuable: “Why am I here, dr. Ziggurat?”

He smiled again: “Straight to the point. Very well. Are you aware that I am the managing figure of the US representative team in this Beyblade championship?”

“Until now, I wasn’t” I lied, but I was not going to give him the satisfaction of admitting I Googled Hades Inc. last night.

“How did you like the battle yesterday, especially as a supporter of the European team?” He grinned and looked at me directly over his orange-tinted glasses.

“Doctor, am I really here to talk about that? Besides, I didn’t even watch it.” I blurted out, I don’t even know why.

“Now now, lying is not very ladylike. I’m sure you know that” He fixed his glasses: “Besides, we are well aware of your affiliation with Julian Konzern, and your recent… how shall I put it… change in this affiliation?” I stared at him, I did not know what to say. Yes, I was frequently photographed with him and his family, so I wasn’t unfamiliar to the occasional photo in the newspaper, or a mention in a gossip column, but this guy seemed to have more information on me than I would be comfortable giving if he directly asked me.

“We think you were not treated fairly by Julian, or Excalibur.” He lowered his tone a bit: “and after seeing your passionate support for the team regardless of the severed relationship, we could not help but want this extraordinairy woman for ourselves.”

“Excuse me for being so direct, but why are you interested in my personal life and disrespecting my privacy?”

“Please forgive me. I am a scientist, I’m not so good with words.” He explained, but I highly doubted that statement: “What I meant to say is; we think Julian and Excaibur treated you unfairly on a personal matter just as much as a professional one. You abandoned further studies and pursuits after graduation in order to support Julian, and were not compensated for the years of devoted service in any way. How is that fair?”

“I loved- I love him.”

“Yes, but do you see in what kind of a position he put you in? And left you in?” Ziggurat continued: “not to mention your family.”

In order to not come across as outraged, which I was, I took a moment of silence before I asked once more in a soft tone: “Doctor, why am I here?”

He smiled, this time a genuine one I think: “We would like to help you and your family by offering you a position at Hades Inc. with a generous salary. You would be working closely with the members of Starbreaker at a salary of your choice.”

I was absolutely baffled: “What?”

“We know you’re a supporter of the European team, but we hoped you might give our generous offer a thought.”

I thought about it, but how does any of this make sense? Who am I benefitting here? I could literally be ripping them off for vast sums of money? For what?

“And what would be the nature of my employment?”

“What an eloquent young lady” Ziggurat purred: “This is exactly what the boys need. We would like to hire you as… an assistant, shall we say. You would be living and working in the Starbreaker wing in order to bring a softer touch, and more team building among the members.”

Then the other doctor spoke up: “Their schedules are very densely organised, so we considered adding a feminine touch might help the boys feel more calm by bringing a more realistic environment to them. More balanced.”

“Balanced?” I asked, and I still wasn’t sure what my job would be exactly.

Ziggurat picked up this time: “We’ve seen your demeanour by Julian’s side, and we believe you would enhance our boys’ performance by providing them with a friendly, emotional support. Plus, the program of the Academy does not yet feature girls, so having a female presence might remind them of previous education, or of home.”

“And you would pay me whatever I asked to be a friend to the boys from Starbreaker?”

Carlisle cleared his throat: “by no means are we suggesting a particular kind of relationship, we would financially support your natural development of a relationship with the members of Starbreaker as a means of helping them reach their maximum potential.”

I accidentally snorted: “wait, you think I’d like to hang out with Jack and Damian after what they did to my friends yesterday?”

Both doctors chuckled: “Ah yes, Damian loves to take things too far to entertain the audience. And Jack is… simply extravagant.” Ziggurat explained, but I was not convinced at all. Enteratining the audience or being dramatic is completely different from torture and ridicule.

“I am sorry gentlemen but as of this moment I am not sure about this offer.”

There was a brief pause, before Ziggurat spoke up again: “Camila, you are a smart girl. You went to a prestigious school, and while all of your peers followed their dreams and potential, you were halted by your family’s lack of funds, yes, but primarily by a boy who asked you to drop everything to be by his side, only to leave you to fight your battle alone once things got too difficult for him to manage.”

“He never asked me.” I defended myself

“Not directly, no” Ziggurat left a moment of silence pass: “Consider our offer until this time tomorrow, and if you decide to join us, send a message to this contact.” He passed a card across the table, and leaned back in his chair: “Would you like a tour of the complex? Something to eat?”

Darting s look at the clock on the desk, I’ve noticed somehow an hour and a half passed, and I did not want to be here any longer: “Actually, I am still quite tired from yesterday. I would like to go home.”

After saying goodbye to both doctors, and promising to Ziggurat I would carefully consider his offer upon leaving the room, the door closed behind me cutting me off from the conversation the two doctors were about to have:

“She is very interesting” Carlisle massaged his temples: “not even typically pretty, she really has that subtle beauty.”

“Yes, she is very European” Ziggurat said, perhaps even sarcastically: “but she is exactly who we need in order to get what we want on all sides, and from what the investigators found her family is… quite desperate” He chuckled at this last part.

Carlisle looked at his colleague: “Do you think your plan is going to work?”

“You’re the psychiatrist, dear friend.” Ziggurat poured a glass of whiskey, and handed it to Carlisle: “Besides, it’s all women are good for isn’t it?”